It's the afternoon and I've had my lunch
Yesterday a child who looked about 13 asked me to buy him 10 Mayfair. I laughed in his face and said "Not a chance". Should I have been harsher to him or is it just kids being kids innit? Back when I was a lad, I was getting served booze at the age of 14, but obviously not in my school uniform, and I've always been of the opinion that if you don't look old enough to buy it yourself, you shouldn't have it.

Discuss.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:34, 203 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I thought Mayfair was a porno?

( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:41, Reply)

10 copies seems a bit excessive

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:51, Reply)

But then you could have lots of pages open at once
and pretend it was an orgy.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:52, Reply)

Clicking this ^

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:55, Reply)

I like having the popular page
It makes me feel worthwhile. Now I just need to say something funny enough for people to click on.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:58, Reply)

good luck with that

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:00, Reply)

I've just single handedly popular pages that response.

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:04, Reply)

there are a load of my posts on the popular page
what's going on?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:06, Reply)

Your smug gland took control of your right hand
and clicked them all.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:07, Reply)

must have happened when I blacked out a minute ago....

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:12, Reply)

There was a time
back in the days of yore when I hung around /links and I would have at least two links on the popular page at all times* and was regularly in the newsletter.




*slight exaggeration
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:03, Reply)

You could just get angry at people.

(PsychoChomp, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:05, Reply)

Sadly
due to getting angry with people, I have forever been branded a bully and a cocksucker by the slightly more retarded faction of this board. Hence they won't talk to me and I can't get a good debate going.

I do try and wade in on QOTW when I get the chance though.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:07, Reply)

Hahahahahahahahahaahahahaha!
You cocksucking bully.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:10, Reply)

The best thing about it
was my other account recieving a gaz from a particular person slagging off this account.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:17, Reply)

Excellent!
I'm putting my alternative account into storage for a while...it flew a little too close to the wind and was almost uncovered. Not good.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:23, Reply)

that was good
who was that from again?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

I don't want to get into naming names here
Well, that's a lie, I do. It was B69.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

I thought so

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:32, Reply)

You Kaoltarded spastic

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:17, Reply)

Absoposilutley

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:17, Reply)

Really?
Maybe he was wallpapering with them.
**insert manglue joke here**
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:53, Reply)

When I was under 18 I had no problem getting served anywhere. Several months after I turned 18, everywhere started asking me for ID.
It still happens now. Yes I should take it as a compliment that I don't look like a dried up withered husk, but it's still fucking irritating having to carry ID at all times.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:41, Reply)

Um...
I'm going to have to ask you for some ID before you can say that. :)


I got ID'd for superglue when I was 29....
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:45, Reply)

A college friend of mine was asked for ID to buy a magazine a couple of months ago. She's 23.
A FUCKING MAGAZINE THOUGH. Dear god I almost had to get the tena ladies out.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:47, Reply)

What magazine was that?!
Magazine? Huh? Wuh?
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:49, Reply)

Some shit women's trashmag with a SEX feature inside

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:50, Reply)

Ha haha
Not even worth the humiliation! :D
They get worse when you move abroad, then you return and find out that, no, they really are all that bad!
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:55, Reply)

Why am I not surprised at this information

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:56, Reply)

Sounds like
you own a brain. I'd see a doctor about that if I was you.
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:57, Reply)

Er thanks
ONLINE VALIDATION
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:10, Reply)

I wrote a letter of complaint to Sainsburys when I was IDd
My main complaint was that I was 31, paying with a credit card and the beer formed a small part of my weekly shop. Hardly the typical profile of an underage drinker.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:49, Reply)

I find it funny when people get all up tight about being ID'd
Why would you bother to write a formal letter of complaint? The shop faces a massive fine if they are ever caught selling to minors, I realise that you probably don't look underage by a long shot, but in the US you will be asked for ID in every bar or liquor shop, and the world doesn't end for them. Just get a driving licence or a Prove it card if you're that worried about it happening again.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:55, Reply)

It's actually the person who sells them the offending article that gets the fine, so I'm never shitty with them as I know they're just doing their job. I however do not look under the age of 21, so fail to see why they employ idiots to work the tills who
cannot work out someone's age.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:01, Reply)

Thing is
when I was younger, I always think older people all look the same, so I would never know who to ID and who not to, so to be safe I would ID everyone. And if they are under 18 themselves they need to get one of the older till monkeys to approve it anyway.

I'm pretty sure the shop gets in trouble too though.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:03, Reply)

But you think that everyone looks the same
RACIST!
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:04, Reply)

I'm worse than Clendrix me.

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:05, Reply)

But she has far better norks.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:07, Reply)

Nobody has better Norks than her.
Even when they are all jizzy.

In fact, especially when they are all jizzy.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:09, Reply)

But who's jizz is it though?

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:11, Reply)

She has a special man for that sort of thing

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:16, Reply)

Ahhh this is true

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:17, Reply)

My ex's family used to have a member of staff
(yes, they are that posh) called the Backdoor Boy.

Perhaps Clendrix has one too.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:18, Reply)

I'm sure he does that too
when she asks him.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:22, Reply)

Asks?
Tells.
( thealternativefact, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:56, Reply)

good point

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:59, Reply)

*shudders*

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:10, Reply)

Oops :(

( thealternativefact, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:21, Reply)

Haaaaaaaaa, there'a a shop called Starlight stores in a village called Downley, just outside High Wycombe where I went to Uni that employs kids and every single fucking time my flatmates and I were in there there would be a strangled cry of
PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT...CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARD. The twisted gnarled form of Pat would then lumber out of the back room, still on the phone, gurning away and adjusting her skirt - she only had 3 functional fingers on her left hand, so it took a while. Take one look at us and snarl "Serve em quick"
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:08, Reply)

^bugger I look like a right grumpy cunt don't I!
To be fair to the till monkey's though, I worked in an off license for a few years when I was a student and was a license holder for a while - shitty managers kept stealing stock and getting caught, so that dubious honour belonged to me - and I sometimes got it wrong with ID'ing people who were old enough to drink, but I wouldn't ask the same people over and over again to produce ID unlike the cunts in supermarkets.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:04, Reply)

You think they remember you?
You think your face is so stunning that they have it seared onto their very souls?

Arrogant much?
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:05, Reply)

They remember because she punches them in the face
like a true b3tan.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:08, Reply)

I like this idea

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:09, Reply)

Oh yeah, this too :)

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:10, Reply)

I endorse this approach

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:15, Reply)

This was when I was going into the same Sainsburys every single day to buy cigarettes at the same time, being served by the same hatchet faced old cunt
We would have the same argument every day because she was an uppity fucker.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:09, Reply)

You should have taken chickenladys advice.
Or, you know, stopped smooking.

edit - or even smoking.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:10, Reply)

Chickenlady's advice
that has a nice ring to it.

For all your lifestyle needs - Chickenlady's advice.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:12, Reply)

You should totally start an advice thread every day. I'd read it

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:13, Reply)

Good idea
*goes off to start advice thread*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:19, Reply)

Will you give
sexual advice?

(Not that I would ever need it, it's for a friend who's too shy to ask.)
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:12, Reply)

I am. No point quitting before exams though. Lots of point quitting after them

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:12, Reply)

I wrote a letter of complaint because she was incredibly rude about it
and I didnt like being treated like a piece of shit.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:20, Reply)

I was 6'2" at 14 and my brother was one of the local crusty/hippie types
so not only was I the designated beer buyer but I had to go to the bikers' pub to get the acid and hash too. I grew up far too young. Started drinking home made (not by me) wine at about 12 or 13.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:44, Reply)

6'2"?
I imagined you were shorter.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:51, Reply)

The dangers of hot washes
?
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:52, Reply)

And an imagination peopled with shortarses.

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:53, Reply)

in the words of DJ Chuck Chillout & Kool Chip,
'I'm Large'
www.youtube.com/watch?v=djXdOJLqOvU


Fucking TUNE
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:55, Reply)

I watched half of that
not my type of music at all but I did like the Bond theme in the background.


*Goes back to listening to Obadiah Parker*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:02, Reply)

In truth
I've not played it myself for over 20 years but I used to play those records for money. Nowadays I just buy creaky old rock records
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:06, Reply)

I listen to things like that and suddenly become my father
"Where's the tune? Where's the singing? That's not music!"

It's rather disconcerting becoming my father...what with me being of the female persuasion and all that.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:09, Reply)

Mayfair?
I thought all the little scrotes smoked Lambert & Butler? You should have slapped him for being a ponce, it's the only way they learn.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:44, Reply)

I think Mayfair are the same price, if not cheaper than L&B

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:48, Reply)

Ah...they just sound posh (what with Mayfair being the bestest spot on Monopoly)

( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:50, Reply)

You should have knifecrimed him in the lungs.
It's cheaper in the long run.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:48, Reply)

Nowt wrong with a bit of stabby when it's for the greater good
besides, you could have sampled the sound of the air whistling from his lungs as the pneumothorax occured and made a fortune on spotify
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:50, Reply)

*applause*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:51, Reply)

I'd buy that

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:58, Reply)

Ooh, that's so down with the kids! :)
I must be aging... I would have given him a stern ticking off.
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:51, Reply)

srly now, is no one going to ask the question that Al's so clearly been waiting for someone to demand from him
WHAT DID YOU HAVE FOR LUNCH AL?
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:54, Reply)

WOO!
I had a ham sandwich and an apple, a Braeburn, they're my favourite type, and I had a packet of salt and vinegar French Fries and I'm saving my yoghurt until later when I get hungry about 3 or 4 o'clock.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:57, Reply)

I don't eat lunch anymore
/eatingdisorderinthemaking
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:06, Reply)

YEAH!
Anorexia is where it's at these days, only the fucking retards are throwing it back up again afterwards, all the cool kids are exercising some fucking self control YOU BUNCH OF FAT CUNTS.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:08, Reply)

Couldn't be doing with vomiting
but missing meals is easy - just have a cup of tea instead. And the thing about getting fat is that you're just eating too much - solution - eat less.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:14, Reply)

I quite agree
I lost lots of weight about 10 years ago. When people asked me how I did it, what diet I was on and so on, I just reply with the truth.

I ate less.

Rocket science it is not.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:16, Reply)

I've lost a stone since I came back from holiday in the summer
I'm rather pleased with myself.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:18, Reply)

Was it from your massive beardface?
I wouldn't notice otherwise
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:21, Reply)

lost about 2 and a half stone in a period of time that I can't quite figure out
it's good, aside from having to spend lots of money on new clothes. that was a pain.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:21, Reply)

YES! THANK YOU AL!
I have been waiting for another opporunity to post this for aaaages.


(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:58, Reply)

Anorexia is so 1997
Now it's all about eating what you like and then going for powerslides on escalators.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:15, Reply)

But if I ate what I liked
I'd get stuck in chairs.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Eat standing up, makes all the difference.
Oh dear god, I've just found a pro anorexia site.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:22, Reply)

Pro anorexia is a bad thing
and I'm too lazy to eat standing up.
I was once told that you should always sit down when you can and lie down even more.

I try to do this as much as I can.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:25, Reply)

I'm doing this right now
I thought all the pro anorexia sites were taken down a few years ago.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:32, Reply)

Along with all the extremist websites
look how that worked.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:41, Reply)

This is true. b3ta's still here afterall
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEY skinny girls, how you doin?
*rubs thighs*
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:46, Reply)

They aren't skinny enough
STOP EATING YOU FAT PIECES OF SHIT! NO ONE WILL LOVE YOU WITH ALL THAT LARD HANGING OFF YOUR BONES! YOU ARE REPULSIVE! STOP LOOKING AT THAT CAKE! YOU CAN GET CALORIES BY PROXY!
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:50, Reply)

STOP LOOKING AT MY CAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAKE
Bastards the lot of em.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:58, Reply)

Pink Lady
Worst apple ever. Followed closely by Granny Smith
( Jimbuktu See? Right here, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:09, Reply)

I like a Granny Smith occasionally.

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:10, Reply)

I had an Innocent organic veg pot
Steer clear of the Tuscan Bean Stew one, it's bloody awful
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:34, Reply)

The cops routinely run stings around here, but mainly for alcohol, not cigs.
They'll get underage kids to ask you to buy them booze, and then arrest you if you do it. A couple of my friends have been busted for it and got 30 days in jail for it.
Fortunately, I've never fallen for it.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:55, Reply)

When I worked one summer in cardiff
I recall buying myself some lunch and smokes in a spar when two young welsh slags came in, each pushing a pushchair with baby in situ. Both got refused for cigarettes on an age basis.

how I laughed
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 12:59, Reply)

Rant time...
Al mentioned above he'd had salt and vinegar French fries for lunch, which got me thinking. Twice recently I've seen adverts for crisps where they're referred to as 'chips'. One was for Kettle Chips (see, even in the product name) where they were extolling the virtues of hand made, simple chips, and Pringles, who advertise the number of chips they have in the new packets.

But wait a minute. This is Britain. These are actually crisps. Chips are also made from potatoes but are shaped as rectangular prisms and served in paper from a chip shop.

I have no problem with Americans, but this is going too far.

/Daily Mail
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:12, Reply)

but this is going too fa except for the fact that they are fat stupid and warlike, but at least they aren't all criminals like the darkies, or smell like curry like the pakis or steal our jobs like the poles.

note to the mods - this is not intended seriously
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:15, Reply)

or drunks like the micks
or stabby gits like the Scots.
And don't even get me started on the Welsh.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:16, Reply)

And as for the English...
What can I say?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:19, Reply)

Gods own people
Apart from people from Cornwall
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:20, Reply)

You will be assimilated.
Resistance is futile.
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:19, Reply)

All bastards

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Or thieving cunts like the scouse
Or stupid sounding idiots like the brums,
or rude cunts like the londoners,
or incapable of wearing more than a vest than the geordies.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Oh shit, I think I'm part Geordie
I'm only wearing a vest and jeans today. No wait, the central heating's on and I can hear people being arseholes outside. Must be London :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:23, Reply)

I agree
*waves union jack*
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:15, Reply)

Why do people care about shit like this?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:19, Reply)

I've noticed that, too
I like Americans, my father lives there and is married to a very nice one - it's not even their fault.

Companies emulate them in their ad copy because subconsciously people like the terminology as they've seen it in films, People who are cunts, that is.

Another big area for this is the post - or 'mail'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Pharmacy?
No, it's a FUCKING CHEMIST
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:22, Reply)

Yes
An Americanism which amuses me is 'drug store'.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:24, Reply)

So what is the person who doles out the drugs called?
Are they a chemist? NO THEY'RE FUCKING NOT ARE THEY, THEY'RE A FUCKING PHARMACIST!
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:25, Reply)

Damn you cunt, stealing my posts before I can write them.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:29, Reply)

Yes, thats as may-be,
but, the shop, sorry, 'the store', itself is called a Chemist. Boots the Chemist, for example.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:30, Reply)

Go down many high streets
and you will find Lloyds Pharmacy, as well as hundreds of smaller independent PHARMACIES. When you are in a hospital and the doctors want to drugs, they don't say "Nurse go to the Chemistry and get me 300cc's of morphine STAT!" They say "Get yourself to the Pharmacy".
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:32, Reply)

HEY MR PHARMACIST!
Can you help me out today?
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:35, Reply)

No
you're too much of a cunt, ask me tomorrow.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:41, Reply)

Teeee-une
It was covered by the Fall was it not?

The original is a personal favourite
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:41, Reply)

The Other Half,
recorded it originally, although i was weaned on The Fall version.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:47, Reply)

this is the truth
see also: pharmaceutical industry
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:39, Reply)

You are right,
it's a store where they sell drugs. ?Why call it a Chemist's Also, there are no "Chemists" in Drug stores; they’re all in university laboratories trying to make bombs for our holy crusade no, Righteous war on terror no: our waste of people’s lives.
(MichaelS wasn't picked again, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:28, Reply)

Don't order chips in Spain

You'll get crisps, unless your on the South coast in which case you'll get a free egg on top and some curry sauce.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:20, Reply)

Meh
I never really mind getting IDed, being accused of stealing Amaretto in Tesco however... I strongly objected to! I ask you... who steals a bottle of Amaretto?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:16, Reply)

I'd consider it
I like Amaretto.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:17, Reply)

Me too but
I didn't steal it! :(

I was going to a pic-nic in Hyde Park and had ran into Tesco to pick up some plastic cups and got stopped at the door. They found the booze and obviously it wasn't on the receipt, so DiT had to run back to our flat, find my receipt for the booze which I had brought the day before, come back and show it to the man before I was let off... booooo!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:23, Reply)

Wait a sec, you took amaretto to a picnic in Hyde park
That's your first mistake right there. Everyone KNOWS it's pancake topping, not for drinking. Consider yourself suitable chastened.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:25, Reply)

Hehehe
I did, I like mixing it with coke to make a yummy drink! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

Never tried it with coke, only neat or on pancakes
Probably accounts for why I'm not a massive fan of the stuff :)
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

Oh its rather nice.
I'll only drink it neat at Xmas after dinner! :D
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:31, Reply)

Then this I must try when I go drinking next :)

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:33, Reply)

Hurrah!
Apparently it tastes sort of like Dr Pepper... so if you don't like that... then maybe give it a miss! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:36, Reply)

I wonder what it'd be like if I mixed Amaretto and Dr Pepper
a positive TASTE EXPLOSION in my mouth
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:40, Reply)

Maybe
I wouldn't try it though... just in case! :S
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:41, Reply)

Maybe I should just stick to Corona
Fucking expensive, generic beer of the gods. Trufact
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:43, Reply)

they'd cancel each other out
and it'd be like drinking booze-water
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:41, Reply)

pancake topping?
weird

also, amaretto and coke? that sounds gross
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

Its
ACE! You can't judge until you have tried it.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:31, Reply)

naa, I know it'd be too sweet and sickly for my liking
I understand why you might like it though.

despite liking coke, I find that mixing it with spirits makes it do weird things to my teeth.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:33, Reply)

It's the perfect pancake topping
Try it and then have an opinion, until then STFU
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:34, Reply)

the perfect pancake topping is lemon juice and sugar
(almost type lemong)

this is fact.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:35, Reply)

Oh fuck off with your traditional boring stuffs. The sugar never dissolves so the pancakes are crunchy. That's rubbish.

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:41, Reply)

use caster or icing sugar
or enjoy the fact that the crunchiness is awesome.

you've got some fucking crackpot ideas about what is good.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:42, Reply)

They aren't real sugar, so it doesn't work. Besides, then I'd have to specially buy caster or icing sugar just to have as a topping
then have it sit alone and unloved in the cupboard because it's foul.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:45, Reply)

How is it foul?
It's fucking SUGAR!
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:49, Reply)

It's fucking rubbish sugar
it doesn't work as a sugar based product. Sherbet's better than icing sugar.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:52, Reply)

caster sugar is real sugar (unless you don't count white sugar as real sugar)
it's just fine grained.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:50, Reply)

It's too orangey for crows

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:58, Reply)

hahah

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:09, Reply)

Ah I see
Maybe you should stick with the beer then! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:35, Reply)

lemonade or OJ works fine with spirits
or I just guzzle jagermeister
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:37, Reply)

Isn't that
basically an acoholic Dr Pepper?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:38, Reply)

Yup
But nicer! :D
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:40, Reply)

Dr Pepper & Jack Daniels
*taps nose*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:42, Reply)

Hmmmm
That could work...

*notes*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:48, Reply)

Tramps will steal anything,
You must look like a tramp.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:18, Reply)

This is true

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:21, Reply)

It's an excellent bit of logical thinking

( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:22, Reply)

Meanie
You're no longer allowed doughnuts on Saturday
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:24, Reply)

I can though right? DiT said I couldn't have pizza, so I fully intend to gormandise the doughnuts instead

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:27, Reply)

But of course
Why did DiT refuse you pizza?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

What!?
Hang on, we're taking time out of our busy lives to help him move and he's starting to bogart all the good food already?

What a cunt.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:30, Reply)

Haha
I haven't been made aware of this, although he might have told me and I just didn't listen, that happens a lot - I get distracted easily.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:34, Reply)

I can't remember now, I think because I called him a gayer for Al
*checks* No wait, it was because I said the prize on the gadget show would be mine.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:35, Reply)

Ahhhhh
Well then he would be annoyed. He's been trying to win for quite sometime now... despite us already owning most of the gadgets they have in the compo... he's a strange cookie.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:37, Reply)

I tried to win for a few weeks, but got bored. The cost of the text was too prohibative anyway

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:42, Reply)

This is my problem
Whenever they have a track day as an additional prize I enter... other than that I have stopped now, its too depressing.
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:43, Reply)

Tramps drink Lambrini
when they're having a party
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:21, Reply)

You're confusing Tramps with Lampito
though it's an understandable mistake
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:23, Reply)

OMG you bitch
Just because everyone's thinking it, does NOT give you the right to say it. You utter utter fuckwad.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

I'm a bad person
I'm sorry.
(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:29, Reply)

Giggles like the girl she is

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:47, Reply)

I don't look like a tramp
I look like a flim-flam you bummer
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:23, Reply)

you got mentioned on tv again last night

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:25, Reply)

Way to change the subject dude

( fuck shit up the best you never had, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:25, Reply)

oh sorry
she does look like a tramp

how's that?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:27, Reply)

Was it a documentary about tramps?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

It was about bummers

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:29, Reply)

You'd know
Being the main star of the show and all
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:39, Reply)

Really on what this time?
Was James May there?
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

It was Derren Brown
He's in your brain now
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:29, Reply)

like a worm
eating away at your consciousness
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:31, Reply)

Making you do stuff
stuff
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:32, Reply)

Oooooh
Mystical
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:38, Reply)

I don't look like a tramp
I look like a flim-flam you bummer
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:25, Reply)

You're confusing her and her husband

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

*headbutts*
Shhhh you
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

Quite the resemblance
www.fadingad.com/blog/queens/elmhurst_flimflam.jpg
(PsychoChomp, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:26, Reply)

Hahahaha
brilliant
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:27, Reply)

Were you ever caught?

(PsychoChomp, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:28, Reply)

Nope
You'll never catch me alive copper

*legs it*
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:32, Reply)

I learnt to say that in Welsh when I was at uni
well, "you'll never take me alive coppers"

one of the two useful welsh phrases I learnt and could only say when drunk
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:34, Reply)

Hehe
Its handy to know in every language I suppose! :)
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:38, Reply)

I wish I could remember it
I can remember how to say I like tortoises, but that's not as useful
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:40, Reply)

Haha
Probably not... unless you carry a tortoise around with you, in which case it will always be relevant to any conversation you have!
(Flim-Flam the Magnificent "You is talking loco and I like it!", Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:42, Reply)

I'm not in the habit of doing that
maybe I should start
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 13:43, Reply)

I got asked for ID in Tesco a couple of months ago.
I drew myself up to my full 5' 7 and a half, pointed at Flim Flam and yelled:

THAT'S MY WIFE, YOU KNOW!

Instead of taking it as a random proclamation from a strange man in Leytonstone, the checkout operator took this as proof of ID, and ran my bottle of Tiger Beer through the checkout.
( Devil_In_Tights the *real* DiT!, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:35, Reply)

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

(Bazongaloid, Tue 17 Nov 2009, 14:48, Reply)