I just saw the best youtube comment ever
someone remarked grumpily that singers should just sing instead of 'wafting sex around like a cat on a fan.'

What have you heard recently that has made you laugh?

Alt Q: best supermarket? Or your nearest one/what that says about your town
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:40, 130 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

WAITROSE

(PsychoChomp, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:41, Reply)

100% agreement

( djtrialprice, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Waitrose is well expensive!
Not everyone can afford to spend £9 on a jar of coffee!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)

It's only as expensive as you want it to be
Lots of the stuff is a similar price to other supermarkets, just better.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:06, Reply)

this is true
if my nearest one wasn't 15 miles away then I'd shop there
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:06, Reply)

'It's only as expensive as you want it to be'?
What - you can haggle with the staff?
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:36, Reply)

I like to call it 'shotgun-haggling'

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:39, Reply)

The police call it 'armed robbery'.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:53, Reply)

Asda, every single time
And this made me laugh!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:42, Reply)

that is really funny
especially the emphasis on thousands of years
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)

I love them all equally
Except for any co-operative type. Over-priced shite.

I also severely mistrust the meat that you get in LIDL.
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:45, Reply)

I concur in principle
But as a vegematarian's boyfriend their meat is of little concern to me, and their prices make everything else acceptable
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:51, Reply)

I've only got a Tesco and a Morrissons near me
And fuck Morrissons.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)

I love the salad bar in Morrissons
it's so delicious
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:05, Reply)

they do good meat too
and bread
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)

Our Morrissons is frequented by, how shall I put this,
The dregs of society.
True, I live in Stratford-upon-Avon, so even the dregs aren't that bad. But still, they're scum.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:22, Reply)

the one near me is in a place called Beacon Heath
or more accurately Broken Teeth. Full of similar dregs
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:23, Reply)

Sounds lovely!
Our Morrissons is right by the Job Centre, hence it attracts all the doleys.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:27, Reply)

Oxford is a bit like that
even the dregs of society are relatively alright, though we do seem to have more mad people than other cities
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:27, Reply)

We tend to have more Mildly Racist Tories
Like my grandad's girlfriend (go Grandpa!) who was shocked that the local Conservative candidate is an Iraqi. Outraged, she was.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Oxford's just a strange place
definitely attracts strange people
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:30, Reply)

Booths

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)

Booths?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:48, Reply)

Northern supermarket
Lovely fresh produce, local meats and cheeses, just a nice friendly place.
We don't have one but I go whenever I'm in Cumbria.
And I've been to the preston one.
And I'm collecting their hessian bags with different designs.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:52, Reply)

mm that sounds really nice
I'd like a place that sold a lot of local stuff
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:55, Reply)

And their booze section is good too

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:00, Reply)

Their beer selection beats every other supermarket's selection into a cocked hat
Its absence is the drawback to living down south...
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:08, Reply)

Yeah
I was able to get my dude's fave ale there for his birthday.
Wouldn't have had a chance in Liverpool. (I dont think)
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Choose Booth's booze

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:09, Reply)

now that I think about it
Sainsbury's booze section is a bit rubbish. When I had a cocktail party a couple of years ago and asked everyone to bring a spirit, some of them were pretty weird but Asda had them all, whereas Sainsbury's didn't even have triple sec when I wanted it a few months ago. Well, they do, but only the brand name stuff, like Cointreau, which I can't afford.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:45, Reply)

^This
I wish there was a Booths near me.
( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)

Me too.
They're not particularly big supermarkets but they have SUCH a range of everything.
Good stock control and good use of space.
/supermarket geek
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:28, Reply)

I have two about 3/4 hour drive away from me.
It's not really worth the trek.
( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:31, Reply)

It so is

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:40, Reply)

When I'm back home
I live less than 3 minutes from Booths. It's ace, especially when I play the impoverished card to my ma and she takes me shopping there. That happens less often now, sadly...
(berk, Wed 19 May 2010, 16:02, Reply)

I am jealous
My favourite is either Kendal or Ulverston
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 16:05, Reply)

Ahem
Windermere for the fantastic cafe, and wierdest confusing entrance that then sends you round the one way system
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 19 May 2010, 16:57, Reply)

Sainsburys,
only because inverse snobbery makes me reject Waitrose (and I can't afford Waitrose). And I choose Sainsurys because there's only a giant Tesco near me and it's full of kinfecriming chavscum. I'm going to do that there online shopping sometime soon (probably if my ankles get anymore swollen) and I'm going to buy stuff from Sainsburys.
( crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:50, Reply)

I'm of the same opinion as you
Tesco is full of scumbags. They aren't any really cheaper than Sainsburys either.

plus Sainsburys is the only supermarket on my way home from work
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:54, Reply)

This
Sainsburys is on my way home too.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:55, Reply)

I should really shop in the local farm shops
but they have all been aimed at rich cunts, so while the stuff is good, it's also way too expensive.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:59, Reply)

I'm surprised you don't frequent the local boulangerie

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:01, Reply)

if I had one then I would
the closest thing is Martin's Pie Shop.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:05, Reply)

you live in Prince Charles place don't you?

( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)

nope, next one along

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)

I would if I had any farm shops
around. There's not even a greengrocer near where I live or where I work. I miss Leamington for this sometimes.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:15, Reply)

there is a greengrocer on my way to work
but it opens after I go to work and closes before I leave. fucking useless.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)

I used to think Sainsbury's was for snobs
until I actually had to shop in one. Now I realise that Tesco and Asda are indeed full of parasites and I am in fact a snob.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:06, Reply)

good girl

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:07, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=9DC3xNPwLe8
( Lisette von Falcon, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:53, Reply)

Sadly
we only have Sainsburys here. Two in town, and a Co-Op ten minutes bus away. Which says the whole city is a bit middle class
Edit: though there is a Marks and Spencers
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:54, Reply)

You live in Oxfrord
Surely the denizens look down on the middle class?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:57, Reply)

Nope
Oxford is middle class not upper class. Really. We don't even have a Waitrose let alone anything better
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:01, Reply)

Isn't there one in Headington?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)

I don't think so
but then I've never really explored Headington
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:12, Reply)

I go to Asda to make myself feel pretty

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:55, Reply)

Are you the only one not wearing PJs?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:59, Reply)

he wears a nightie
and has his hair in curlers
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:01, Reply)

Stubbing a cigarette on the pushchair full of Stella...

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)

By which you mean the beverage and the child named after it

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)

Nah - the kid's called Nokia.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)

WRONG, ACTUALLY
Asda is near my work so I only ever go there looking smart. And I only EVER go there if I'm having a bad day and need reminding that it could be worse. However hideous I may be, at least I haven't scraped the bottom of the Asda-shopping barrel
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)

one thing Asda is good for:
towels

lasted a fuck load longer and are just the same soft and fluffiness as ones we got from Next for 5 times the price.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:14, Reply)

I did not see that coming

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)

I like to keep you guessing

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:20, Reply)

Pricktease

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:40, Reply)

Prick

(PsychoChomp, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:41, Reply)

Pri

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:46, Reply)

I really hate that PJ wearing phenomenon
it's like tracksuits didn't look common enough for them
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:09, Reply)

The Asda in Gloucester is like the obesity wing of a mental hospital.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)

hahaha
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:29, Reply)

Never seen it here.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:34, Reply)

I buy all my food locally to support my local small shops and businesses
just messing, I do my weekly shopping at Tescos. If you go early you avoid all the dole scum and it's a reasonably pleasant experience.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:56, Reply)

Great insult, "She was fat and smelt of Asda"
I can't shop in Asda as it's full to bursting with scum adn I feel dirty when I leave.

Sainsbury's for me as there is a local one around the corner.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 19 May 2010, 14:58, Reply)

"She dresses like an explosion in Primark"

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:01, Reply)

Budgens
Finest North London purveyors of shit groceries.
( fuck shit up the best you never had, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:00, Reply)

We have Budgens in the westcountry
for our sins
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:02, Reply)

Yes.
With baskets of 10p 'out of date' crisps near the tills.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:05, Reply)

The big one near me is really just a petrol station
but I never use it because you have to queue for ages behind food shoppers. "Pay at Pump" is the way forward.
( Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:11, Reply)

I go to all the Supermarkets for various reasons.
Asda because it's a minute away from work.
Morrisons for a certain brand of wine and it's the nearest one to my home.
Tesco for a big shop so my mum can get the points on her card.
Sainsburys when I want a certain type of bread or just fancy a change.
( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:04, Reply)

I regularly shop in sainsburys
and I'd say that bread is one thing they do worse than most other supermarkets.

tesco's own bagels are good, for all you bagel lovers out there.

to be clear, I don't mean people who fuck bagels
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:08, Reply)

They stock a certain German bread that I like.
And I get various odds and sods that I can't get anywhere else.
( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:10, Reply)

interesting
what is the bread like?
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)

yeast, flour, water and salt?
cooked for a bit
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)

*shakes fist*
why I oughta....
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:15, Reply)

It's a German ready sliced rye bread.
I don't get it as much as I used to.
( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:16, Reply)

I like rye bread, I shall look out for it.
in fact, I love most types of bread. Think it is Morrison's that do a salt and black pepper tiger loaf. Fucking sublime
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:17, Reply)

I only really like Morrisons for the bread.
The rest of their stuff is crap.
( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:25, Reply)

Pfft!

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:23, Reply)

can't believe I missed that....

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:25, Reply)

and they're pretty much the same price
as most other supermarkets
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:14, Reply)

Not something I have ever considered...
...but now you mention it
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:12, Reply)

essentials from Tesco
nice stuff and treats (mainly meat) from Waitrose or Shelford Deli, weekly dose of lunchtime fruit from a local grocer
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:07, Reply)

Booths
And they have a great selection of beer too.

Expensive, but the quality is great.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:13, Reply)

Though speaking of Sainsburys
never go to the one in Bristol near Parkway. Freakiest shop ever, absolutely filled with bizarre people
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:16, Reply)

what, like a Somerfield?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:17, Reply)

I have never
been in an Iceland, Lidl, Aldi or Netto store

The Cambridge Waitrose is awesome, full of yummy mummies and staffed almost entirely by fine young 'gels' who go horseriding and eat swan for dinner
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:18, Reply)

Lidl and Aldi occasionally have some good stuff
continental meats and things like that

Iceland is fucking diabolical. I got my fridge freezer from there though, because I needed one that was a weird size and they happened to have it.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:19, Reply)

there is a Lidl about twenty minutes away from me
I have been there once and bought some rather nice tortilla crisps. I think I'd mistrust meat from there though
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:22, Reply)

I love Aldi
They have a lot of strange things or food from Spain at an incredibly low price.

It has good beers as well.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:23, Reply)

I've only been in one Lidl
In Dublin. I was very confused by the haphazard stacking of pallets full of stuff in no discernible order.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:24, Reply)

Aldi is great for fruit and veg.
And post Wimbledon you can get a 'Pikey' Pimms for about £4 a bottle -and let's face it if you are lobbing it into a jug with ice, cucumber, mint, fruit and lemonade, as long as it is near the mark you are in business.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:23, Reply)

haha my room-mate has that
and also the cheap version of Malibu, called Coconut Dream or something similar
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:24, Reply)

Read the label.
'Coconut Dream' is air freshener for the car.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:31, Reply)

I've actually picked up a reasonably decent Chablis in there
for a bargain price.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:24, Reply)

Ah
And I like to buy the meat at the butchers and the fish at the fishmonger in the market. It's much better than in the supermarket.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:22, Reply)

Well said. And how continental of you.

( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:26, Reply)

Ha!
I love going to the market. Bury and Stockport are very good. I usually go to Manchester Arndale, as it's close, but it doesn't have many things.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:28, Reply)

I'm a sucker for those Italian markets that tour town centres round here.
Waaaay over priced foods - but then where else could I get them?
I spent £25 just on cheese last time I went.
Why does B3ta talk turn to food mid-afternoons?
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:33, Reply)

I'm on a diet as well :(
but I am temporarily calling it off at Pizza Express tonight.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:36, Reply)

I'm going to Florence on Friday
We'll see how my diet copes with that... I think I'll probably get fed up for not being able to eat what I want, and just stuff myself.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:41, Reply)

I'm so jealous
Enjoy Florence for me
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:49, Reply)

I'll think of you while feeling guilty for enjoying my pizza
I can't bring anything back, though, as the bags cost more than the ticket, so I'm not paying for luggage.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:56, Reply)

If you want to buy good continental food
Aldi is usually good, but you have to be lucky, as they don't stock the same thing twice, which is annoying.

There is a fantastic little shop in Didsbury that sells great cheeses, sausages and continental foods. It's more expensive than the supermarket, but it so good.

I think we all think about tea at this time. I have a bit of nervous stomachache (if that's the real spelling, it's a very funny word), so no food for me right now.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:40, Reply)

it is the right spelling
but has a space 'stomach ache'
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:47, Reply)

Why?
You write headache, and backache, don't you?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:49, Reply)

that is a very good point
for which I don't have an answer. I suppose technically headache and backache should have a space too.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:51, Reply)

Ay
English and it lack of rules. It makes my head in.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:56, Reply)

I have a good market in my town but never have time to get to it as I work in another town.

( girlinthehole, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:28, Reply)

I have a (different) proposition.
The market stallholders should set up their own on-line shopping delivery service. 'Avacart' sort of thing. Then we could all get market goodies instead of prepacked Asda shite.
( Larry Vest One day at a time, sweet Jesus, FFS., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:53, Reply)

I second it!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:57, Reply)

I should do that
the people at the meat counter in my local supermarket are all completely incompetent - 4 x 200g steaks? that'll come out to almost 900g then - fucking numbnuts
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:31, Reply)

I would do that
But I can't cook, and butchers don't sell oven food.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:33, Reply)

you can cook sausages in the oven.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:35, Reply)

and a roast

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:38, Reply)

And joints of meat.
*Edit Damn you Vippers.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:40, Reply)

did it take you 2 minutes to write those 4 words?

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:44, Reply)

Yes.
They are in the right order, well thought out and have some semblance of meaning.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:54, Reply)

There is a great cooking tool
It's a silicone tray with a cover, and another tray with holes (like a steamer) that goes inside.

You put lemon juice and a few herbs on the bottom of the no-holed-tray, then the holed-tray with whichever meat you fancy, then cover and to the oven. I promise it'll be delicious.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 19 May 2010, 15:43, Reply)

nor could I really up to a year ago
but its surprisingly easy to cook nice stuff, even if at the moment im limited to about 10 different dishes.

plus stir frys and pasta sauce (tin of chopped tomatoes plus anything from sausages, bacon, onion, mushroom, garlic, peppers, lob in a bit of oregano or mixed 'erbs and serve spinkled with parsley or basil and your done)
(Halfy By light alone, Wed 19 May 2010, 15:49, Reply)