b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 832569 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

New Thread - last one got long
I hate this question so I'm asking it. Where do you see yourself in the 5 years?

Alt Q? who would win in a fight - Keith Chegwin V Bobby Davro. No holds barred.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:35, 121 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
coke, hookers and a pimped out car
Alt Q: I do not know who either of those people are
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:36, Reply)
gimps from British television.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:40, Reply)
Renting a flat with a mate/bird
In SE London, New Cross is my ideal place. Working for a half decent local paper. Then I will work my way up the ladder, become editor of the Guardian and print vicious rumours about all of you on the front page.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:39, Reply)
Guardianwanker

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:41, Reply)
I used to read The Times
but the culture section is utter toss.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:42, Reply)
I no longer read The Times
Used to but not anymore. But The Guardian is still shit. Monbiot is a waste of space
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)
The Grauniad is brilliant
I remember meeting a writer from there at a careers' evening, and he said the standard "Oh, maybe we'll have your name in the paper!" I responded with "Well I hope you spell it right"

I was 14, and I hadn't realised they had a reputation for mis-spelling things :/
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)
haha that's pretty good
we had a former editor of The Guardian in to give us a talk a couple of terms back
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:47, Reply)
I was sick by that point of correcting people on the pronunciation
oooh, Raef from the Apprentice is on Come Dine With Me. DELICIOUS
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)
the only Apprentice candidate I remember offhand
was the 'I went to SANDHURST' guy
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)
Oh that was brilliant
I remember him. Raef I always thought was Indian, he's half Portuguese.

IDENTIFICATION FAIL
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:53, Reply)
RACIST!

(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)
Oh totally.
How goes it?
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:14, Reply)
I have a cold
which is making me grumpy
(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:15, Reply)
Oh dear, feel better soon.
I'm doing delightful nothing. I'm horribly bored.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:18, Reply)
Download the open source version of Transport Tycoon deluxe
and play it for hours and hours and hours.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)
Isn't that Windows only?
/MAC fag
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)
Probably
you should get a proper computer too in that case.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:24, Reply)
Possibly
Though I have a simple computer for a simple mind.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:25, Reply)
You can get it for Mac too
As I have it on my Mac.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:30, Reply)
I'd forgotten how much I loved that game

(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:31, Reply)
So had I
I hadn't played it for year. I built lots of planes and made huge amounts of money.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:33, Reply)
Linky?

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:46, Reply)
Not relevant, but just read this on FML
"Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He also decided the best way to end our relationship was to kill me and our virtual child on The Sims 3 by setting us on fire. FML"
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)
that's excellent

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:45, Reply)
The one and only time I played the sims
I made my own family. I died in a fire and my daughter was taken to military school. I started playing as another bloke in a house up the road. The first time I used the chemistry set it made a love potion and my recently widowed wife fell in love with with this Michael Bachelor guy. What a slag!
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)
Probably just the same.
Maybe I'll fail this year over and over and over and over again and take 5 years to complete my course.

I don't particularly know.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:44, Reply)
No need to worry, that wont happen to you
they'll kick you out if you fail your re-takes
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:49, Reply)
not if you have a good reason I'd assume
like feeling sleepy on the exam day
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)
you could claim you have ME

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:53, Reply)
"My hypersomnia's playing up again, sorry!"

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)
The worst thing
about having a genuine real excuse is the unwillingness to use it.

I'd probably have lied through my teeth when I was younger about being ill and not being able to do end of year exams, but now I've got a real reason I turn into the most stoic of stoics
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:56, Reply)
There's a boy on my course who does dramadramadrama to get out of shit
I don't know if he's making shit up, has an underlying problem but is milking it, or is as bad as he says.

The latter is almost certainly not true.
You're just a better person.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)
I girl on my uni course ended up with a first
because she put in for extenuating circumstances because her boyfriend had dumped her. He dumped her 6 months before the end of the course and they and been going out for about 6 weeks. Her grades were worse than mine before they regraded. I'm bitter.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)
I got a first
by working hard.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)
And that's the way it should be.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)
I've only ever failed two exams
and one was on purpose
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)
"Sorry sir, I had Vipros"
"Well, alright then, take the year again."
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 17:35, Reply)
I passed everything this year, thank god

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)
Well done

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:52, Reply)
Me too
with a distinction as well. Apparently my research project was the highest mark they had given including last year.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:00, Reply)
As it happens
in five years time I expect to have finished my degree, also finished my conversion course, and to be living poor and alone in London waiting for the good days
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:45, Reply)
I imagine things will be much the same
although I hope to be surfing much more, have finished doing up my house and have bought a van and some kind of sporty convertible.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:46, Reply)
You'll have a kid
and a people carrier. And your surf board will be used mainly for ironing.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:48, Reply)
if I have a kid it will have been a terrible accident
I'm seriously considering the snip just to prevent it
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:53, Reply)
God me too

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)
easy for you lot
much more difficult to convince them that 21 is the right age to make that decision
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)
We're 28 and have no children
Pretty sure they'd try hard to talk us out of it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:58, Reply)
I'm pretty sure
I read somewhere they're much more unwilling to do it to women
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:59, Reply)
Because women change their minds about FUCKING EVERYTHING?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:00, Reply)
I'm 29 now :-/

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:59, Reply)
Oh dude. I'm sorry
I'm not far behind ya.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:00, Reply)
that is close to Monty territory!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)
30
:(
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:10, Reply)
Surely you can just tell them
that they're your damn tubes and if you want them tied, then tied they shall be? Threaten to go to Mexico to do it, or something.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:12, Reply)
Baby killer.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)
Not killing
Preventing.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)
happily

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:55, Reply)
I'm the same I have no interest in having my own children
I like giving them back at 3.15pm.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:58, Reply)
This attitude should be encouraged
it's a rare day when my serenity isn't disturbed by some wailing, snot-coated shit screaming because his lovely mummy won't give him something he wants.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:58, Reply)
I just don't want them
nor does the mrs.

and even if she did, she has rationally said she wouldn't be interested in having kids with someone who doesn't want them, and being with me is more important than having kids could ever be.

which is nice
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)
Conversely
My mrs said "I'll get kids out of you somehow..."
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)
you poor bastard

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:05, Reply)
It'll end up
With me ripping my balls off and throwing them down a well, before laughing like a maniac and collapsing from bloodloss.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)
sounds like a good plan

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:07, Reply)
Cauterisation is probably your best bet
ripping is so terribly...bleedy.
(berk, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:31, Reply)
Surely that's when you lean back, fold your arms behind your head and tell her to give it her best shot,
safe in the knowledge that you wound Clenders up to the point where she castrated you years ago?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:23, Reply)
People are often shocked
by my intransigence on this subject.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:05, Reply)
You've fallen into such an obvious trap there
The fact that you used the phrase "She rationally said" when refering to a woman is evidence enough.
(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:20, Reply)
that is a good point
and one that kept me awake at night I have to admit, but I've conducted more research and am confident that it was a momentary aberration in which she actually engaged the usually dormant rational or "manlike" centre of the brain.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:35, Reply)
I thought that said "it will have a terrible accident"
and I was like "dude that's dark".
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:26, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:35, Reply)
A van? Are you going to travel the country solving mysteries?

(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)
yes
and sleeping
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:52, Reply)
barefoot and pregnant, hanging clothes out on the line next to my trailer

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:50, Reply)
will someone nearby be playing a banjo?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)
um
no
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:08, Reply)
shame

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:16, Reply)
it'll likely be bluegrass on the radio though
"I hear a sweeeeeeet voice caaaallllllliiiiiiing, waaaaay up in heaven on hiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh"
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:17, Reply)
Will you still think about those times we spent listeing to Miley?

(Bazongaloid, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:17, Reply)
are you kidding me or what
i'll totally be rocking my hips like yeah
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:18, Reply)
BRANDINE!
I gone blocked the turlet!
(I helped save b3ta! Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:53, Reply)
In 5 years
I'll probably be in the same job, same house and with the same car. But I'll be covered in awesome tattoos.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:51, Reply)
Your car won't last five years

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:21, Reply)
On the moon
i will be the fucking moon lord
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 15:54, Reply)
read that as fucking the moon lord

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:01, Reply)
FUCKING FUCKERS!
GODDAM it. Stupid bloody charity shops. Waited in all day for delivery of chair, nothing, no phone call, anything. Called them for the second time today and they are all like "wah wah wah there's someone out in a van, they might be coming"

Can't really shout at charity shop staff, though :(
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)
someone give me sympathy!
the outdoor theatre thing I was going to this evening looks like it's been rained off, too.

i am doing a sad face :(
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:19, Reply)
awwwwwwwwwwwwww
there there
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)
that's better
I nearly had to winge that I couldn't even get sympathy from pretend internet people

thanks
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)
I feel I should ask why are you buying a wheelchair?

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:31, Reply)
eh?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:33, Reply)
I'm sure somewhere you said it was a wheelchair
oh man now I'm goingg to have to look where I have gone insane
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:41, Reply)
temporary insanity

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:46, Reply)
permenant temporary insanity

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:47, Reply)
in theory
a successful novelist living in cheshire with hot husband and possibly some sort of animal/baby thing and a villa in the caribbean for writing in.

in practice i'll still be here. working 15 hour days and whinging about it online instead of cutting it down to 12 hour days!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:02, Reply)
What age do you want to retire?
and what age do you think you actually will retire?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)
35
65
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:04, Reply)
That is a significant gap. Like that Jagger girl's teeth.
How easy is it to progress to in your company.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:06, Reply)
She looks like Nosferatu
/tangent
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:10, Reply)
Ye I don't get it at all
some quirky models are ace but Jagger.... I suppose it's just a matter of preference though.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:15, Reply)
So does your mum.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:39, Reply)
Animal/baby thing?
So you're going for novelist/rogue genetic engineer? Or were you just going to shag various beasties until one of them knocks you up?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)
James or Craig?

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 18:08, Reply)
My Daughter will be 7 and a half
and my second child will be 4 and a half. So I am guessing I will be bald, broke, possibly divorced and even more autisms than I already am.
(I helped save b3ta! Peej, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:03, Reply)
If all goes well
and by that I mean if I've managed to drug Wiggy in the manner of Mr T, I will be in Australia NOT Canada.
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:22, Reply)
Chompy will still find you there.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:23, Reply)
Didn't you know?
Chompy is Wiggy
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:27, Reply)
on a completed unrelated note
I found a picture of Darth and his bird
thechive.files.wordpress.com/2010/08/random-hilarious-pics-10.jpg?w=500
(I helped save b3ta! Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:30, Reply)
OMG
winnah of the internet
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:32, Reply)
awesome

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:34, Reply)
POTW
Loud office lol
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)
Hahaha
Jesus christ, how thin is that woman?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)
too thin

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:42, Reply)
I'm so sexually confused right now

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:36, Reply)
I thought I saw him the other day
here
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:37, Reply)
holy shit
that really looks like him
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:37, Reply)
I'm pretty convinced it IS him

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:42, Reply)
I'm most of the way to being convinced.
disturbing, yet unsurprising
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:43, Reply)
+& his boyfriend

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 16:42, Reply)
Celebrating the fifth anniversary of you asking this question.

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 20:10, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1