PSYCHIATRIC HELP 5 cents
THE DOCTOR IS IN
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:02, 199 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

I had a blip
I got all grumpy but I've had my mum's roast. I'm doing my quiz, seeing my mates, had a bit of booze, and I promise to keep my snappy temper in check from now on. But if I feel the red mist descending, can I call your premium rate number?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:10, Reply)

Certainly toots!
Mothers' Sunday roasts ftw. They release endorphins for sure :)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:21, Reply)

hey ma
I'm curled up in bed watching come dine with me. Feel a bit ick still.
How the fook are you! Sluuurrrrp xx
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:15, Reply)

You got a nangover?
Or you sickly?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:17, Reply)

proper sick so worthy of sympathy!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:18, Reply)

Come here. I will look after you.
As long as I get to be the little spoon later on.
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:21, Reply)

Hiya you!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:24, Reply)

Alright Darlin'!

( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:27, Reply)

yay lusty snuggling

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:26, Reply)

*delivers copious sympathy*
I'm knackered, I have aching muscles which didn't even exist 'til yesterday. We took my Mam to Go Ape for her birthday :)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:23, Reply)

What's Go Ape?
I'm on my phone so please don't make me do google...
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:25, Reply)

crazy rope swinging climbing walking adventure place

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:26, Reply)

Ooh, I might be going there in a few weeks!
But I don't like heights :(
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:34, Reply)

MTFU and go for it mate!
I'm the biggest wuss so if I can do it, you can....
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:36, Reply)

Having to do a lot of MTFUing soon
My brother's got us tickets to the Fright Night at Alton Towers on the 30th, but I have a childhood-incident-caused fear of waxworks as well and there are bound to be loads. Having nightmares about pissing myself in fear in front of a load of kids :S
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:38, Reply)

Kanga pants are the way forward ;o)
Love your sig btw!
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:44, Reply)

Thanks for the tip :)
Haha, cheers!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:51, Reply)

^ this
and with zip wires dude :)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:35, Reply)

Just makes me realise how fearless I was as a kid
And how desperately aware of my own mortality I am these days.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:44, Reply)

I'd still have had sympathy if you'd had a hangover.
It feels like total shit the same as a 'genuine' illness. But after you'd got better I'd have laughed. I have a cold that is threatening to hit but is fortunately just at bay. What kind of sick do you have?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:23, Reply)

fainting vomiting sick
Possible food poisoning
Have drank copious amounts of water
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:25, Reply)

Too much water can make your tummy retch.
Keep an eye on your lil self.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:40, Reply)

im sipping often not guzzling
Have learnt that the hard way
But thanks for the reminder Dr roots
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:41, Reply)

!!!!
You have drunk copious amounts of water sweetie.
One of those sporty drinks like Powerade might be better?
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:41, Reply)

i dont have any sporty drinks
I do however have timeteam
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:43, Reply)

Ohhh snap.
This is all I can manage to do today. I might have a walk by the river later, but I probably won't.
*lazes*
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:18, Reply)

The sun's just come out here...
You should definitely go for that walk lovey.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:24, Reply)

I am waiting for a gentleman friend to join me.
Walking is wonderful, but walking with company and someone to suffer hangovers with is wonderfuler.
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:26, Reply)

is it your boooooyyyyyyyfriiiiieeeeennnnnd?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:29, Reply)

I have nothing to say to that.

( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:34, Reply)

heeheeheehee

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:34, Reply)

You are going to tease me mercilessly next time I see you aren't you?
Meanie.
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:37, Reply)

would i do something like that!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:38, Reply)

Yes.
Yes you would.
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:38, Reply)

ok i would
But only because I think its so cute you have a booooooyyyfrrrrriiiieeeend
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:40, Reply)

Ohhh shhhhh.
You know I don't have a boyfriend. I could never cheat on you, even though you bully me.
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:51, Reply)

we've got a naughty kind of love

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:53, Reply)

hahaha :)
that's better than the Phil Collins version
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:05, Reply)

Anything's better than Phil Collins!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:06, Reply)

That's such a yes!

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:36, Reply)

Lusty and *****
in a tree
K.I.S.S.I.N.G
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:37, Reply)

Hahaha!
I would never do that sort of thing! Boys are rubbish and smelly.
( wanderlust, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:41, Reply)

TOTALLY

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:01, Reply)

I've had a fucking shower today you cheeky mares.

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:22, Reply)

Can you diagnose aspergers?
Online.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:29, Reply)

I think I've got it now.

( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:32, Reply)

And multiple personality disorders from the looks of yesterday's threads!

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:35, Reply)

I've only got one personality
But she's an indignant cunt!
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:37, Reply)

I was sympathetic to her at first.
But it's such a catalogue of disasters and mishaps that my credulity snapped after a while. Too much like this Walter Mitty-type twat I used to work with.

*edit* I'll clarify that I meant that you're adept at spotting the alternative accounts of the various mentals on here. I should really learn to fucking read what people are writing!
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:41, Reply)

I'm not fussy on how it's most of us who take the piss out of her
But it's me who cops the shit! She seems to think I'm some popular cheerleader type who needs taking down a peg or two. We all know I'm a generally amiable but occasionally venomous dork.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:47, Reply)

Can't see you with pom poms to be honest :)
I think it's probably because you saw through her straight away.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:48, Reply)

give me an R!

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:49, Reply)

No!
Give us a T you sexy bastard.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:56, Reply)

milk? sugar?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:05, Reply)

kipper tie?

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:08, Reply)

Welcome to my world.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:33, Reply)

Totally
I'm doing a level 3 course in autism and everything.
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:33, Reply)

Well today ends a week of pure productivity.
I was going to cook something nice tonight, I have a dressed crab that I was going to toss with some pasta and garlic and parcily and smoked garlic. It would be really nice but I'm soooooooooo00o0o0o0o0o0o tired, like, really shattered, I only got a few hours sleep last night. I didn't manage to finish the code I wanted too, but I got a lot down. The monday deadline was self imposed so I guess it'll be fine; I'll be finished by tomorow. Today a lot of my code went OH WOE IS ME, but now I know everything that it's doing.

Anyway, enough about that, I want sushi tonight, a big sushi order, but I'm 50/50 over weather I want to spend that sort of money on a mela. But I really really want it. Fuck it, I'm going to have it, 'cus I deserve it. I'm going to order it in about 15 minutes when I decide what I want. I think I'm going to get.

- 2x Prawn Tempora Tamaki
- 1x California Maik
- 1x Salmon Skin Maki
- 1x Ebi Goyza
- 1x Teryakki sauce

... and one more thing, donno what yet though.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:31, Reply)

Ebi Goyza
Sounds like an Israeli footballer.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:36, Reply)

No, fuck it, fuck it all to hell, I'm going for it, and it'll do for lunch tomo too.
- 2x Prawn Tempora Tamaki
- 2x California Tamaki
-1x Salmon Avacardo Maki
- 1x Salmon Skin Maki
- 1x Ebi Goyza
- 2x Teryakki sauce
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:40, Reply)

You've made me want sushi now!
I had a rather awesome chicken risotto cooked for me last night. I'm returning the favour with mustard chicken and noodles next week.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 17:42, Reply)

oh god it's good.

( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:53, Reply)

it has finally stopped raining
15 mins before i am going out, woo.

anyone got any exciting sunday plans??
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:07, Reply)

Playing footie in an hour or so
Always fun in the wet! Unencumbered by hangover as well which is nice :)
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:09, Reply)

I am down in Devon with the gf & her mate for the weekend. Long beach walks in Branscombe & Beer (village) so far today. Soon to be followed by beer (liquid) and a meal in a pub in Colyton.

The cottage we are staying has wireless so decided to stay a bit longer and work from here tomorrow.
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:11, Reply)

sounds ace :)

( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:23, Reply)

yes
meanwhile i will be spending tomorrow battling with the fucking tube strike. i am most jealous.

fucking fucking tubedrivers.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:23, Reply)

the tube strike is one of the reasons we are staying another day plus this is the nearest I have had to a holiday for two years.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:34, Reply)

i swear to god
bob crow is the only human being on the planet i could not only punch right in his smug fat face but actually love doing it.

the economy is on its fucking knees, and he is happily going to cost it millions? ffs. it should be treason!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:36, Reply)

If this was Bob Crow Cluedo
My guess would be...

Swipe, with the pink boxing gloves, in the station.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:00, Reply)

Much as Bob Crow is a massive tosser
we have no idea what's actually going on behind the scenes. Don't think that people that work on the underground would voluntarily give up their pay over something frivolous, and also don't think for a moment that without the presence of the union, that the tube management wouldn't take absolutely any and every opportunity to shit all over the workers and compromise both the service and safety of passengers.

I agree it's a pain in the arse, but to say "The economy is on it's knees" as a reason why people shouldn't stand up for the rights of workers is pretty silly. It's times like this when unions are more important than ever as unscrupulous management will use this as the perfect excuse to fuck over their workforce if they can.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:06, Reply)

no al, your logic hurts me
it inconveniences ME, and there are NO TAXIS so i have to walk from kensington to the city or take a 3 HOUR BUS RIDE.

and they do it ALL THE TIME. this isn't a one-off thing, they threaten to strike almost once a week.

somewhere between the flippancy and the genuine irritation i am going to kill bob crow, i swear. at the bare minimum i am sending him the bill for my taxis/new trainers!!!!!!

right, am i going to be in clapham by 8pm... er...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:29, Reply)

I'm roasting some lamb
And if I feel well enough, opening a bottle of wine before having an early night.

Going anywhere nice?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:16, Reply)

just over to clapham
to have dinner with a friend, although he is already texting me saying "don't be late."

i am late for EVERYTHING. i will be late tonight because i am still sitting on the sofa in a towel watching episodes of "friends" i have seen ten times already.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:21, Reply)

I'm late for everything.
Chronic lateness is a symptom of dyscalculia. Marilyn had it written into her contract. Did you master speech at an unusually early age?
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:36, Reply)

funnily enough, yeah
i could talk in sentences and practically read before i could walk.

32 years later, i still talk too much and don't move unless i have to...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:39, Reply)

I'm pathologically punctual - I hate being late, I keep thinking I'll miss something.
But I don't mind other people being late, which is apparently unusual.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:44, Reply)

^This is me

( girlinthehole, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:08, Reply)

Snap!
If we'd been born later we'd have had government grants and points added to our degrees by now. Google 'dyscalculia checklist'. It was a while ago but I did it and scored high. I showed it to my boss and asked if it afforded me late starts every day. She said "No, Roota, because I'm a hypochondriac too and I haven't found an illness that works for me, so why should you?" Oh how we lol'd.
( Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:44, Reply)

omg
that would explain sooooo much. eg why i am doing a masters at oxford in english but got lost driving back to london and spent about 20 minutes trying to work out how long it would take me to drive 15 miles at 90mph (i reeeeally needed the ladies).

my boss would, however, react exactly as yours did!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:50, Reply)

10 mins do i win a prize?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:35, Reply)

Football sucks

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:48, Reply)

how was the oiseau?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 18:50, Reply)

Nice. Can't decide if buried is brilliant or shit.
Nothing gonna happen though so fuck it I say. How was the gym?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:03, Reply)

but its with ryan reynolds
Yummy yummy
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:36, Reply)

It is either genius or crap i can't decide
He is good though only him for an hour and a half.'how you feeling sick note ?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:43, Reply)

just off kilter really
Spaced
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:34, Reply)

How did the date go this afternoon Bob?
Get a snog? Cloth tits or ever inside-tops?*

*I am Jeff and I'm 14 years old.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:01, Reply)

Not really a date just a girl i have liked for ages.
She was shit scared and held my hand in her crotch for about half an hour. So feel up ftw.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:05, Reply)

So she likes you too?
Or did she just have a itchy vadge?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:07, Reply)

Have no idea really . Nice and warm though. What you up to.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:10, Reply)

I've got a hangover.
But I am about to check on my lamb which is in the oven.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:16, Reply)

I have pork waiting and massive drugs

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:18, Reply)

How massive are the drugs you have?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:37, Reply)

I would consider myself tO be a veteran smoker
However this shit has turned my eyes grey I'm a little concerned
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:40, Reply)

You won't throw another whitey will you?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:43, Reply)

No way Jose
Watching the wire forgetting about footie for a while.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:46, Reply)

I've just had roast lamb.
It was well lush. Pork good?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:38, Reply)

oh yes
now watching alan partridge. Jurassic park!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:43, Reply)

Back of the net!
My hangover has cleared and I'm wanting cider, but this will mean going to the shops.

What should I do?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:55, Reply)

GO to the shops
and reward yourself by buying more cider than normal and a cake.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:58, Reply)

Cake eh?
any cake in particlar?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:01, Reply)

dunno don't like cake
you come across as a cake lover though. I would get a can of tizer and some jelly tots.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:04, Reply)

Ahh... Yes Bob.
Or the Bob Grooming Kit as it's also known!

I do like cake. But I don't have a favourite cake type.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:09, Reply)

you can get a remarkable amount of rohypnol in a jelly tot

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:11, Reply)

+Bob can get a remarkable amount of rohypnol jizz in a jelly tot
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:12, Reply)

You are fundamentally flawed
and a broken human being. you are bert aicmfp
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)

You don't mean that do you?
Do you?

**crosses arms and refuses to hand over a fiver**
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)

Arise
Jeff Monkey Sex
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)

Bob.
This isn't even funny.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)

go and get your cider
clear your head and when you come back we can start again and say no more about it bert jeff
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:25, Reply)

Okay.
**To the happy juice shop!**
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

How do you cope when you miss someone so much that you have a sad face now and then?
That's you and DG by the way.
( girlinthehole, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:05, Reply)

Deal with it by throwing MOAR BASHES.
Obviously.
(berk, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:12, Reply)

Aww.
The missus tried to ring you earlier but your phone appeared to be borked. (Landline that is)
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:25, Reply)

*MASSIVE HUGS*
with maximum nork-squishage :)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:07, Reply)

Hey Dr!
How do I avoid the inevitable stress now I've taken on a new job off of someone who is off ill with stress??
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 19:14, Reply)

Hmm, that's a tough one......
Know your limits and learn to say "no".
5 cents please.... ;o)
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:09, Reply)

that makes complete cents
limits are for the weak!
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

Doctor T
How do I make myself actually look for a job since I can't be bothered, as I just think they'll all say no? Or not bother saying anything at all.

I managed to have a big Sunday lunch and a big Sunday dinner today. That's definitely the way to do it.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:46, Reply)

You clearly have rejection issues.
5 cents please....
( Tourette's ( . )( . ) has a monkey hair in her fried egg, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:10, Reply)

what the fuck is cheryl cole playing at with her choices
Gamu and girl with awesome hair should have easily gone through rather than stupid peroxide bitch
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:52, Reply)

Illness has reduced you to watching the X-factor?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 20:56, Reply)

Oh dear...

( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:03, Reply)

im sick!
And enjoy shit tv
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:19, Reply)

I'm sick too.
Clearly it's a cool thing.
( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)

all the cool people are sick
I'm handing my notice in on Tuesday woo
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)

Woo!

(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:32, Reply)

I am Doctor Woo!
I shall take you all away from all this sickness.

MTFU!
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

can you take me somewhere warm

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

Like your vagina

(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:42, Reply)

Al, what you like or don't like is your own business.
But kindly remember that you're a happily married man.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

We have the heating on if that's any help.
Jump in your Audi. You may get here just before the wine runs out.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:42, Reply)

Woo indeed!
When are you moving?
( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

1st november ish
Woo yay
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:08, Reply)

Christ
You really are ill.

I never watched it (cos I was eating my lamb), but I would have done. It makes me smile when the people who don't get through start to cry.

LOSERS!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:11, Reply)

you are a massive gimp for watching that shit

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:27, Reply)

I never watched it!
I said that.*

*Was in no way watching Strictly instead. Hell No.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)

its ok jeff we can be sad together

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

Apparently I'm a massive gimp too.
A sad massive gimp.

How are you feeling TGB?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

im watching 27 dresses
I think that says a lot
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)

I'm watching the F5 key.
I think that says even more.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:38, Reply)

ok you win

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)

if you could be doing anything else right now what would it be

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)

having kinky sex with al obviously

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

I don't want that in my head
I'm already dealing with claustraphobia issues after that film. I don't need sweaty man love in my head too!
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

She's talking about herself

(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

I'm watching pictures of you and your mrs and your monkey

(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:42, Reply)

They are rather splendid aren't they?
Unfortunately I knackered my arm and couldn't do the rest of the course as I couldn't pull myself up the fucking rope ladder. Sad times.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)

Booo
I loved Go Ape when I did it.
(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

It was good.
Zip slides ftw! Unfortunately I landed awkwardley on one of the nets and pulled something in my right forearm. I couldn't extend the fucker properly afterwards, which meant hauling myself up a wobbly rope ladder was damned nigh impossible.

It's fine today though. Greek anti-inflammatories are brilliant.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:55, Reply)

Says that you have a vagina
But the fact that you can see it from space says it even louder
(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

It's like some sort of giant loud-hailer
I feel kind of bad mocking the ill one.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:42, Reply)

It's the way it makes the sound echo, it's like a natural megaphone.

(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

That's the word I was actually going for
Damn vocabulary.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

VOCABULARY...
Vocabulary... Vocabulary
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

Well, it looks like rescuing the trapped occupants
Is going to be harder than extracting a Chilean from a mine.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

four kicks in the groin

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

It's alright, the Scottish mutant has five anyway.
/Chernobyl gag.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

The only Chernobly joke I know is that one that goes...
'Why shouldn't you buy Russian underpants'
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

They are made in sweatshops?

(Bazongaloid, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

High polonium content?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

Which reminds me of a joke.
Why should you never wear russian underpants?


'cause Chernobyl fallout.

/Edit: mindpiss.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

you bothered tk put the punchline on though

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

I assumed everyone would know it, which is why I didn't include the punchline.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:52, Reply)

:(

( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:54, Reply)

IT'S A FUCKING BRILLIANT JOKE, RIGHT?

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:56, Reply)

I didn't read it.
I don't care.
I'm just seeing if I'm on /ignore.
( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:58, Reply)

Why on earth would you be on ignore, you smashing lady creature?
Who would do that to you? Who? Let me know and I'll totally do something unpleasant to them, like arrange a meeting and get the missus to fart in their general direction.
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:00, Reply)

Good grief!
I'm not sure even HITLER deserved that!
( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:04, Reply)

It's a total gas, right?
*Edit* Aaaaaah, I see now. It's OK, she already did that at teh Edinbash. I still remember the look on Badger's face as she came back into the club after a smoke...

"Your wife's just nearly killed me".

"She farted, didn't she?"

*sadface nod*
( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:05, Reply)

That was brilliant.

( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

It was a near death experience

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:14, Reply)

who would ever ignore you!??

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:00, Reply)

:(
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post891114
( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:03, Reply)

fucking bitch
Not you obviously!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:08, Reply)

Ninja editor!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:11, Reply)

So when do you become a gawd blimey Londoner?

( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:12, Reply)

around the first november
Still totally jobless ARGHGHGHGHHGHHGHH
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

You'll get there!
BTW, nag Wookiee.
If you're down here early enough on Bash Friday, he'll take you to Borough Market.
( thealternativefact, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)

I've bought him a present so my bribe power is good
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)

Is you move job dependent?
Or are you moving anyway?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)

moving anywY fuck stabilty

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:17, Reply)

I'll follow the story and how relocating goes for you
I'm thinking of making a change too.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)

I'm a badger not a guinea pig!
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:19, Reply)

Well can't you be mostly badger
With a bit of guinea pig?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:20, Reply)

guinea badger?

( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:29, Reply)

Perfect.
The Guinea Badger.

I like that.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:30, Reply)

Done and done
( TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:34, Reply)

guinea badger implies a sweet natured wise creature
I call shenanigans.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:38, Reply)

Start a new thread Bob
This one is cluttered and I've got nothing to ask the Internet.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:39, Reply)

done

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)

you're sick you have an excuse
he is a rational man. Have you got out of bed today for any significat periods of time?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

Periods.
*sniggers*
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

easy bert
got your juice?
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

8 cans of happy juice.
I've gone with Natch this evening.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

A true west country great
I have stuck with my roots also and am smoking marijuana. It's green, I'm Irish. Andy Townsend laced up his boots with less of a connection.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

You are Bob O'Marley
AICMFP

Top of the morning, bloodclot!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

No Woman
No 11 or 12 children
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 3 Oct 2010, 21:52, Reply)