I'm the cream of the crop, I rise to the top, I never eat pig because a pig is a cop.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:01, 260 replies, latest was 15 years ago)

Deep!

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:02, Reply)

Beep!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:03, Reply)

Parp

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:04, Reply)

excuse you!

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:04, Reply)

Berk!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:06, Reply)

Lampito!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:07, Reply)

Noel!

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:08, Reply)

BGB!

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:08, Reply)

Dr Scott!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:08, Reply)

Rocky!
EDIT - fuck, I think I might have to watch that now.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:10, Reply)

Janet!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:11, Reply)

Here's the ring to prove that I'm no joker.

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:12, Reply)

B-G-B-G-B I love you so!

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:12, Reply)

: )

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:14, Reply)

Adriaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:14, Reply)

Khaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!

( Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

Great Scott!

( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:02, Reply)

Lampito!
Enjoying your fb pics from the weekend by the way. Looks like some quality partying was done. What did you think of the cd?
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:08, Reply)

This weekend?
Oh man I've literally just got back. I've been sitting in the lounge watching American football, Pan's Labyrinth, and WOLVES. Had to deal with drugged friends and depressed people, other than that it was fun.

I've not had a chance to rip it, I'm sorry! I'll let you know when I have :) How have you been?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:11, Reply)

It's all good, no rush!
I'm good, not been up to very much though. No Hallowe'en parties for me this year :(
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:17, Reply)

Someone broke the roof, we almost had the police called, my flatmate fireman-lifted my friend up to her bed up 3 flights of stairs
and I got in a bad mood and smoked too much. I did spend 20 mins discussing Horatio Caine one-liners with the best looking boy on my course and the boy I sortoflike. Excellent.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:28, Reply)

Still sounds like a pretty good do, on balance!

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:32, Reply)

I just stopped drinking at around 12.
Didn't help I was having a lot of difficulty breathing, being wrapped in raw silk and steel...
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

Ah, the corset?
Yeah. I nearly passed out wearing one once, but then I had spent the evening dancing like a complete pissed up twat.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

Yeah, didn't tighten it up as far as it could go though, as a precaution.
I do love it. Even if it is the most expensive thign I own.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

I used to have several
but then I lost a load of weight and went really flat chested, so not only were they too big, but they looked fucking silly. I just have the one now, and it's padded. Corsets are awesome, but you really need boobage for them to look right.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

You see I have one and it's an underbust
as I have quite big tits anyway, so need lots of support. I wear it to get more hour-glass not to wop my tits up. Though looking at the photos my tits look well small :(
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

They really don't!

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:53, Reply)

Smaller than they used to be...

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:57, Reply)

Pfft, preaching to those who've heard it, my dear
I went from between a C-D to slightly smaller than a B. Can I get a LAME.
Yours may be smaller than they used to be but I don't think they're quite there yet! :)
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:05, Reply)

Or better yet a terminator, like Arnold Schwarzenegger...?

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:03, Reply)

Woo Berk.
How is your complicated love life. Want to swap?
( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:04, Reply)

It remains complicated
although not that complicated.
EDIT not that complicated more than complicated enough for my liking, cheers.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:07, Reply)

dont worry he'll never see it here

(PsychoChomp, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:10, Reply)

it's too late, I already have

( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:13, Reply)

Haha, an offer like that
is almost worth getting my head kicked in by Roota...
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:15, Reply)

It's alright, she doesn't know what you look like
Plus she's like a delicate, frightened bunny outside the city walls of Liverpool.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:18, Reply)

I didn't mean it like that, you big shitstirrer
/backtracks hastily
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:13, Reply)

just trying to help :D

(PsychoChomp, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)

Try and play me out like as if my name was Sega.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:06, Reply)

Diabetes, feelin' the chocolate

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:07, Reply)

I don't know the next line...

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:09, Reply)

Cos I ain't going out like no punk-bitch.

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:09, Reply)

Something something something
Dawn of the Dead?
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:10, Reply)

I can highly recommend The Horde.
Very gory.
( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:11, Reply)

Haha, I was still quoting lyrics
I'm not really in to scary/gory films, they shit me right up.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:12, Reply)

Get used to one style and I might switch it up up and around then buck buck you down put out your head then you wake up in the dawn of the dead

( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:12, Reply)

That's the bunny.

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:13, Reply)

+ boiler

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:21, Reply)

Who, me?
Unlikely.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)

Clearly you.
Very likely.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)

I am actually a little bit worried that you are serious
if so, I would like to know what gave you that impression...
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)

They always say that.

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:25, Reply)

play your ass
*mumble mumble something* sega.

Is that right? What do I win?
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:07, Reply)

A Wankety Wank cheque-book and pen!

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:16, Reply)

get in!
Seeing as it's Halloween can I have it presented to me by the corpse of Les Dawson?
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)

dubbed by Vincent Price?

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:22, Reply)

oooooh yes
and the zombie Vincent Clarke too. The synth bloke FROM ERASURE (de-ris see last thread).
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

Bluuuuuuue Savannah Song
I'm just imagining zombies lurching across the desert now (sometime in the early hours, etc)
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

:D

( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

I prefer my Hip Hop like this:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tSmbKBt1kXA
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:12, Reply)

Wicky wicky.

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:13, Reply)

or this, the best British hip hop record of all time:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHTTAyIHoIo
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:17, Reply)

Unless it's this:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=tbRpk_uf98Q
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:19, Reply)

You what Monty? Best UK hip hop you say?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yw9GNz-EYP8
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)

Pfft!
*Shakes my middle-aged booty*

www.youtube.com/watch?v=GeZZr_p6vB8
( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)

For shame.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:25, Reply)

Hahaha!

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

Evening happy.
Had a good weekend?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:20, Reply)

Excellent thank you.
Yours?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

It's been okay.
Did some class boozing over the weekend.

Did you get a day with your little 'un? What did you do?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:28, Reply)

i am going to be singing that all night now you fecker
as if it weren't bad enough being at work.

after a 5 hour drive.

because a COW got onto the m6 and decided to cavort around there for a few hours.

this sounds funnier than it was, believe me.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:23, Reply)

Get out your seat, and jump around!
Udderly ridiculous traffic issue
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:24, Reply)

no i am too stroppy for that
there was also traffic all down the m40 where there is never any traffic. how can there be traffic when all you have to do is drive IN A STRAIGHT LINE. the country is full of morons.

also my friends who drive me mad with their constant relationship crises have decided to cement it.... by getting a puppy....... i smell doom.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

When it goes wrong for them, I'll 'look after' the dog.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:27, Reply)

Jeff you nonce.
It's just a puppy!
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

quite funny though
i have to give him that. for once.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

For once?
Yeah, right.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:32, Reply)

you should just be glad that i am willing to give you one
lots of men would pay a fortune for that
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)

That's because you'll tell them it's legal advice.
Thus the MASSIVE FEE.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

the odd one gets it pro boner

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)

You being the pro, yes?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

that would make you the boner in this example

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

Cock.
I didn't think of that.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

's'ok
it was blindingly obvious to everyone else
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)

Dogs age 7 times quicker than humans, the grooming period will be very short.
18 months it'll be legal.*

*Well, dog-fucking isn't exactly legal, but don't let it be said that I don't have standards.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:32, Reply)

walkies?

( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

really sodding glad I'm journeying back from Scotchland by train
Sorry but that is very funny. Mooooo.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)

yeah well, not as funny as you fisting yourself
so off you go........
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

not in front of my pay-per-view webcam yet
I don't lube up to the wrist for less than two thousand daaahling
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)

as if
any of us believe your gaping cavern and tiny fairy fingers require lube
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

aha
that's why I have to use a prosthetic stunt anus
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

my my
a treat for the eyes and the mind
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

the internet is a disturbing place
Tread lightly all ye who enter. Pun intended.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

as a very general rule
if you have to explain your joke, it wasn't funny. if you have to say "i am witty", you aren't funny.

can we agree on this?

then maybe i will admit that you made the corner of my mouth turn up half a millimetre with that one.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

If you have to explain it, it's not funny.
Is the second rule of comedy.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:48, Reply)

the exception to the general rule
is that your audience is composed of retarded fuckwits
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:51, Reply)

Timing
Yes, I gladly concede to your comedic lesson.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:52, Reply)

good stuff
10/10 on the folding like a cheap t-shirt, would bully again
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:54, Reply)

I like cheap t-shirts
I get ready for bed every night like Hulk Hogan
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:57, Reply)

having seen bash pics
the only resemblance i can see is a hint of green skin. is that what you meant?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:01, Reply)

By climbing onto the nightstand
and leaping onto the unconscious muscle mary lying prone on the bed?
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:04, Reply)

You're close
I put on a bandana and convince myself that I'm not actually completely bald.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:08, Reply)

this is even more disturbing
than the plastic arse
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:11, Reply)

Swipey should have told the mad cow to
Mooooo-ve.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

enough of this bullshit

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:32, Reply)

I'm gonna 'milk it' for all it's worth.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:33, Reply)

pull the udder one

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:35, Reply)

... It's got bells on.
Why do cows wear bells?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

For cow herding purposes?

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

No!
It's because their horns don't work, silly.

But you knew that, didn't you?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

urgh

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

What's with the urgh?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:42, Reply)

shit joke is shit!

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

Shit joke is shit!
shit COW PAT.

I know that isn't funny in the slightest
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

I'm in the worst mood ever.
Should I just go to bed? Or should I cry and smoke and drink moar?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

Bed and gaz me why.

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:26, Reply)

You sick fucker.
Getting off on other peoples misery.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:27, Reply)

Well I have to get off on something.
Eh!
( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:28, Reply)

Wayhay!

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

: (

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

It's about 20 million things
and both my parents and I are stressed out because I had a mini panic breakdown last monday, texted them saying I was in a very bad way, felt better the next morning, forgot about it, then my mother had a bit of a panic herself. Just got off the phone from her.

Other than that, it's the usual teenage things BUT FUCK I'M NOT A TEENAGER ANY MORE BOLLOCKS
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

drink more
eat chocolate

sorted
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:27, Reply)

I have a slab of millionaire's shortbread
but I'm feeling fat so nah.

I did your pappadom-and-houmous trick today :D It was excellent!
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:29, Reply)

i told you, yay!!!!!!!!!!!
a million times better than doritos.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

Perfectly balanced in portion size, too
a pack of 8 paps covered the pot.

YES LOL FAT WHOLE POT.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:32, Reply)

the sainsburys local on fetter lane
is open until 11. i am so going to have to go and get houmous and poppadums now, damn you and all your kind.

thai sweet chilli houmous or caramelised onion houmous...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

Thai sweet chilli.
Fo sho.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:35, Reply)

am i speaking to you or not?
i can't remember
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

Don't know.
Don't care.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

lies right here ^^^

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

No word of a lie.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)

Sweet chilli. Do it.
Ooh, you work near where I...pretend to work.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

bit creepy round here at night
compared to mon-fri when it is carnage!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:40, Reply)

Oh god you're there on a Sunday, aren't you.
MADNESS.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)

yeah.......
half year end billing is a nightmare only exceeded by year end billing!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

Best of luck bbz
Don't work yourself too hard.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

muchas gracias chica

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:48, Reply)

Doctor! This woman needs CAKE, stat!
You could drink and smoke more in bed? Whilst eating chocolate? Don't cry :)
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:28, Reply)

No, don't cry.
Instead, see if you can fall asleep with an ashtray on your bed and set fire to it.

The best you can hope for following berks advice is that you'll only have to rewash all of your clothes!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

I don't like smoking in my room.
I like the calming influence of just going to sit outside.

I might plug in False Priest and have a boogie.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

You could do what I'm doing
and watch Rocky Horror. I imagine it would be quite a struggle to remain grumpy whilst watching it.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

I might end up crying.
It reminds me of my friend who I don't see that much since he became a drug addict.

I listened to the soundtrack on the way back from the party, though. It's excellent.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

Oh. Erm...sorry
perhaps something else would be better in that case? Stardust is my go-to film of choice when feeling down. Or Love Actually, although that's sometimes a little too smug and sickly.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

Hahaha, don't be sorry.
I've not seen him for the most part as he's still in Manchester. And because he's fucking up his life and his girlfriend's a psycho cougar. But ANYWAY I do love a lil bit of Neil Gaiman. But not Richard Curtis. Never Richard Curtis. I might watch the new House, or something like that.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

Trading Places is my feel good film of choice
That and Irreversible.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:45, Reply)

And I really want to see
Serbian Film
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:46, Reply)

That looks horrific.
But strangely intriguing
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

Isn't it though?

( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

I read the synopsis.
O_O

How are you, young 'un?
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:54, Reply)

good cheers hon
Nearly home. Here have a hug (it's ok I've got millions).
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:59, Reply)

Thanks lovely.
I'll be ok. I'll have a sleep and I'll feel a little better :)
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:02, Reply)

Erm...
strangely intriguing let's just stick with horrific, shall we?
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:55, Reply)

read it and thought
"wow, I've definitely found my limit"
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:00, Reply)

I just read the synopsis on imdb
I felt progressively more ill and disturbed after every - single - word. But then my tolerance for horror/grossness is pretty low.
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:02, Reply)

Fair enough. We'll watch Love Actually this weekend then
But I have to throw a shoe when Liam Neeson's stepson is onscreen.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:05, Reply)

Oh, I don't know
my usual response to scary films is to grab the person I'm watching it with and hide in their shoulder. So it's not all bad ;)
I went to see Saw 4 with a lad I fancied and ended up literally crawling in to his lap with fear.*

*NB, I nearly threw up on him too, but that's besides the point...
(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:11, Reply)

phone's about to die
so I'll just say quickly, swap 'shoulder' for 'trousers' and you've got yourself a date. I'll bring Evil Dead II.
( djtrialprice, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)

Sold!

(berk, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:48, Reply)

Stardust rocks
:-)
( zulu eh?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:53, Reply)

Is False Priest
a brand of butt-plug?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:35, Reply)

It's my album of the moment.
open.spotify.com/album/4FxK4zjh1fgvLdwgWuomDr
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

Fire up Schooly D
take some LSD and then go out looking for trouble.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=4478SMAc2qM
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

:(
I don't want no trouble.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:35, Reply)

Surely this gets ya dukes up;
www.youtube.com/watch?v=EUiKSkCyRIs&feature=related
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:38, Reply)

Can't hear it bbz
no headphones.
( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)

Just imagine
some angry darkies and you'll get the idea.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

Yay for racism

( zulu eh?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:52, Reply)

I HAVE just got back from Bermonsey...

( Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:52, Reply)

fuck hip hop
youtu.be/IeCWuN0dc5w
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:30, Reply)

Queer boy has queer boy taste in music.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:31, Reply)

I would put my entire life savings on you owning a cold play cd. Or even worse David Gray.
You're the type.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

I have previously admitted to knowing Chris Martin IRL so yes I have Coldplay CD's - his wife gave them to me.

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

I didn't know that
and now you are a double cunt for having had access to him and not slitting his nancy boy throat. And you should have kicked that yank in the cunt as well.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:38, Reply)

Yikes
no more sugary snacks for you.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

I'm not going to click on it
As it'll be the Pet-shop boys covering Jimmy Sommerville and remixed by Erasure.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

with a Marc Almond guest appearance.
Liberace on the keys, the Tom Robinson Band laying down the 'bottom end'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

and Larry Grayson "conducting"

(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

"conducting" playing a bebop solo on the spunk trumpet

/ac
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

Oooh!
Shut that door!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:39, Reply)

I thought he meant the tune by RJD2.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:34, Reply)

My hip hop knowledge consists of Mos Def and the Wu Tang Clan. Nothing else.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:36, Reply)

Mos Def and the Wu Tang Clan
Are both great. Black on Both Sides is one of the greatest hip hop records of its era.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:37, Reply)

The Mighty Mos
never topped this:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=hjfYXyAlrk8
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:41, Reply)

Mos Def is fucking great.
Do you also agree re. Silver Bullet's 20 Seconds to Comply?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)

One of the biggest regrets of my life
is failing to secure a copy of the demos for his LP. It would have been one of the best albums ever, but was delayed by red tape for two years, given a fucking terrible production job and was basically a disaster. The demo was incredible and my pal has lost his 'stolen from the studio' tape.

*cries real tears*
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:47, Reply)

you can't cry real tears!
more chance of getting of a lamb dinner at bernard matthews' house.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

If you'd heard
what should have been Silver Bullet's LP, you'd understand.

OK, imagine that 'Crazy Crazy Nights' by Kiss (your favourite song) had featured a trombone solo...
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:53, Reply)

Kiss are shit you nonce.
Silver bullet? pretty sure that's a sex toy.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:57, Reply)

You have a Kiss duvet.
A troublingly stained Kiss duvet.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:59, Reply)

Kiss are as shit as Guns n' Roses.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:59, Reply)

meh
i would have crawled across 10 miles of broken glass to suck axl rose off back when he was hot
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:02, Reply)

LIES ON THE INTERNET.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:03, Reply)

Actually you are right.
The Cheeky Girls aren't as shit as Guns n' Roses.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:08, Reply)

Music snobbery is completely pointless. You must understand this, you aren't a stupid man.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:10, Reply)

I understand that Guns n' Roses were shit.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)

Your mum

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:16, Reply)

Music snobbery is one of life's greatest pleasures.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:16, Reply)

I don't see the point myself but hey ho.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:17, Reply)

Silver Bullet?
He later did stuff around '97 as Silva Bullet IIRC.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

One of my brother's friends
taught him at school. He threw a chair at a teacher and was expelled.

His name is, I think, Richard Brown.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:55, Reply)

Did the teacher give him
20 seconds to comply?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:57, Reply)

When he wouldn't behave
the teacher requested that they bring forth the guillotine.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:04, Reply)

One of the most hilarious shows I ever witnessed was ODB in Ilford.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:43, Reply)

What a character.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)

Thanks.
What are your views on ODB though?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:48, Reply)

this joke never gets old for my dad/brother
eg we might see a woman walking a dog. and one of them will say a predictable variation of, "god look at that big hairy bastard. AND the dog."

it's an exact science, as consistent as gravity.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:57, Reply)

What are you doing down here Swipe?
This is some serious hip hop business down here. You can only join in if you can rap along to NWA's Express Yourself.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:59, Reply)

That one's more Crackhouse's area, surely?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:01, Reply)

i don't think i understand more than two words in every ten

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:02, Reply)

Then GTFO.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:02, Reply)

don't be mean
or i will just post something here about the new killer heels and red satin balcony bra i bought at the weekend, just to ruin your learned chat.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:06, Reply)

You can stay.
Just as long as you publicly announce that Run DMC were shit.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:07, Reply)

WTF!

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:08, Reply)

I've never even heard of that band.

(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:08, Reply)

You're only young.
Plenty of time to get an opinion on bands you've never heard of.
( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:09, Reply)

you see it's like that...
... and that's the way it is
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:09, Reply)

: D

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:10, Reply)

I'm sure this is a clever lyric reference.
unfortunately I have Time Warp in my head and cannot hear anything else.
(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:11, Reply)

it really wasn't that clever a reference
trust me
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:12, Reply)

*trusts*

(Poppet some assembly required., Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:12, Reply)

Run DMC were wack.
Everybody knows this.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:10, Reply)

Everybody?
You mean you and your mum.
( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:12, Reply)

They went shit
but started out excellent.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

Oddly
I watched a docu on Run DMC this morning on the Biography channel.

It was either that, or scrapheap challenge.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:16, Reply)

Eh?
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ld0ErLw83hw
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:10, Reply)

Wack.
Ultramagnetic MCs, now they were illin'.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:11, Reply)

'A Chorus Line' and 'Funky'
are two of the best records ever. As is 'Give the Drummer Some'.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:19, Reply)

You can stay.
Just as long as you publicly announce that Run DMC were shit post pictures of the bra
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:10, Reply)

I like this

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:12, Reply)

And that's the way it is.

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

HUUUUHHHH

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:13, Reply)

it'll be on the ann summers website
somewhere....
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:14, Reply)

I never thought I'd see the day when the Swipe joins in a hip hop discussion.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:14, Reply)

to be fair
i am dragging it down to the level of bras.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:15, Reply)

Is that really 'dragging it down'?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:16, Reply)

well no
it's more pushing it up into two warm creamy swells just above the neckline of my jumper.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)

*dies*

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:21, Reply)

*swells*

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:23, Reply)

oh no don't do that!
this place would be a sadder and lonelier place without you.

dozer - that was actually v quick and witty, what happened?!
( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:23, Reply)

I am an erudite and suave man.
What else would you expect?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:26, Reply)

you to move over to the left hand side of the screen like a normal human being

( rachelswipe with a fork, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)

Is that because all rappy-hip-hoppers are MASSIVE tits?
(We really need Amberl for any hip-hop conversation)
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:17, Reply)

Amberl is welcome in hip hop convos.
I'll let Monty loose on her.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:18, Reply)

Always a good level.

( girlinthehole, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:17, Reply)

Yay!
I thought you'd be sound asleep by now Blousie!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:21, Reply)

Was it you that said that hip hop just 'borrows' other people's music?
Have a watch of this.

www.youtube.com/watch?v=vPutHJ4qCss
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:22, Reply)

It was me
I think I also described one of the bands that was recommended as a 'black take that' - So my view isn't a valid one.

So the bloke in that video with the record player, did he record both of those records, or is he just nicking sounds from them both?
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:25, Reply)

'Nicking sounds'?
Do you understand the skill involved in what he's doing?
And it's no more 'nicking sounds' than a guitarist playing a G chord is nicking a sound.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:28, Reply)

Dozer.
We've been through this before, and I thought we'd agreed to differ!
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)

Oh Jeff.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:29, Reply)

But it's SO easy Monts.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:32, Reply)

Jeff, check the second half of this then. It should cure your 'nicking sounds' misapprehension.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqvWrK_jf3w
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:35, Reply)

This almost made me pack up my styluses for good:
www.youtube.com/watch?v=wbQiQEEVY1A
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:27, Reply)

sound asleep friggin yourself off to oblivion
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 22:23, Reply)

My hip hop knowledge consists of Mos Def
My hip hop knowledge consists of Mos+s Def Bros FM
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:44, Reply)

My hip hop knowledge consists of Mos+s Def Bros FM
(lkjshaglkasjdhglkhjz lkcvl; g;aodh;owih, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:49, Reply)

Was he like vanilla ice?

( zulu eh?, Sun 31 Oct 2010, 21:50, Reply)

Let me introduce and try to sediuce while you sat all recluse with your trousers all loose.
Name's P.Pop's and I'm the under dog who ends up pulling that girl you wanna snog.
I just do my thing, so surreen, chilled out with no need to shout 'cus I got the clout to not get tickets from a tout.
Just hanging about, always ready just like a scout, dib-dib dob-dob, what was mogley* waffalin' 'bout?
Although I'm makin' cash I act all brass 'cus a man will take ya' down if you flash 'round the pound like you're a don.
You ain't no don, a don is the head of a firm or family, you're a mug not a trooper, the rest say you're a fuckin' looser and they'll use ya'.
Use ya' to do time, you reckon you'd be out by a quater to nine, that's right, in five to six years time, was it really worth knickin' that bag full of dimes?
You'll walk it 'cus you're the big ting but the ting you don't know is when you're welcome to hell with bare man threatenin' sexual acts ya' don't even know.
So think twice when you wanna test the man with the big chest 'cus you'll end up under arrest and no man is buying it was self defence.
You'll be the next man's abigel, so pray and tell, sitting in a cell, wondering how you end up in hell.
Laying down tracks like it's a matter of fact when you lay down a rap and some guy is threatenin' to push in your crap, you made this trap and now you'll end up with the clap.

* I'm pretty sure scout leaders name themselves after jungle book people.
( G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Mon 1 Nov 2010, 7:56, Reply)

This is quite simply magnificent.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Mon 1 Nov 2010, 8:19, Reply)