b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 977458 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

« Go Back | See The Full Thread

THE CASTLE IS HERE!
It looks ace.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:32, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)
Can't you send a link or pic?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:33, Reply)
Pictures!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:33, Reply)
sorry to ask a really girly question
but. how are you going to wrap it? is it in a box?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:34, Reply)
Gayest of all the questions. ^

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:34, Reply)
it's practical ACTUALLY

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Well if it's been delivered already
Then at some point, it will have been wrapped, probably in a box filled with packing paper.

Therefore, it'll be a easy enough to wrap the box.

Alt - you put it IN a box and then wrap that.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:39, Reply)
erm
now who looks TOTALLY GAY?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:44, Reply)
You?
I just applied some cool male logic.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)
It's a little-known fact
that Monty is capable of spinning a fine silky substance from his lower abdomen, much like a spider, which he produces in long strands that can be used to cover practically any object.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:35, Reply)
Is that what he told you it was?
He was spinning a web of deceit.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:38, Reply)
Well, I assumed that's why he said we were playing a game of "spiderman"

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:39, Reply)
I thought 'Spiderman' was where you jizzed into your own hand
Then threw it at your missus' face shouting 'Go web go!'

Or is that just me?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:41, Reply)
Who's got that Rainer Wolfcastle pic?

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
He also does that "pre-web" thing.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
I LIKE THIS

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:46, Reply)
Spak doesn't

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)
I shall wrap it in its box.
I shall also wrap the furniture and figurine sets I also bought separately, so as to add to the SHOCK AND AWE of my gift.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:42, Reply)
it's a really really brilliant present

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:44, Reply)
Indeed, pictures!

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:34, Reply)


(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:41, Reply)
Holy fuck
Your floor is coated in coke!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:41, Reply)
...and who IS that little hottie?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:42, Reply)
That's NOT your daughter?
Oh thank Christ, I was feeling guilty

*unzips* Our Father...
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Oh christ.
It's Pink.

I trust you ordered one for Swipe as well?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:42, Reply)
They do a grey one too
but it looked too boyish: I tookk a vote from colleagues and was emphatically told NOT to get the grey one.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:44, Reply)
Well order another pink one for Swipe.
She'll get all upset if she sees other children get pink things that she hasn't got.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:45, Reply)
[something about monty and his pink thing]

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)
Swipe wants Monty's mighty pink turret?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:50, Reply)
this is hardly newsworthy stuff
my drawbridge is always lowered for monty
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I'm sure that Monty will unleash his 'boiling oil' in return.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)
Don't forget to clean your moat beforehand.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)
I don't think he'll ever reach the keep
He's obsessed with all things Moaty remember?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)
That's excellent.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:54, Reply)
Although not taking it to its somewhat extreme conclusion...

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:54, Reply)
I do hope you remember to raise your portcullis...

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:58, Reply)
haha
you lot have made me laugh with your castle-y puns.

he can breach my ramparts too if he insists.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
Oh, I insist alright.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:02, Reply)
You can fuck her, too.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:04, Reply)
BEST SUBTHREAD EVER.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:00, Reply)
come on then
show me your battering ram...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:03, Reply)
It'll be a good 'knight' for Swipe.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:04, Reply)
*reveals 'siege engine'*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:05, Reply)
*polishes helmet and mighy lance*

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:07, Reply)
*admires splendid lance and mighty jousting style*
*swoons*
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:07, Reply)
*bums castle*
*possibly doing it wrong*
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:09, Reply)
jesus crow
that is a child's toy

what is the matter with you? someone always has to go too far and ruin it...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:10, Reply)
You think the castle's ruined?
You should see what the splinters have done to my John Thomas...
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:14, Reply)
If it's in runies it'll become a tourist attraction and they can charge people to see it.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:14, Reply)
The castle or my penis?

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:15, Reply)
Gasp in amazement as Monty unveils his trebuchet jizz-laucher.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:08, Reply)
Hahaha! Wow!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:42, Reply)
Yup, as does the furniture.
I bought the lot.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
oops! deleted question.
Did you get dragons?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Nah but knights on horseback,
a jester, squires, prince, princess, king & queen.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:45, Reply)
It's huge!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:44, Reply)
I've had no complaints.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:46, Reply)
Pfft.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:50, Reply)
That does actually look like an awesome toy
(And in my colour as well!)
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
Tell me Crow.
Does your abode have air conditioning, or do you not need it because the massive flopping of your wrists creates enough of an air current to keep you cool in the summer?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)
My abode is not air conditioned
And therefore when it gets hot in the summer, I like nothing better than to head down to my nearest cocktail bar, where I can teapot around an air-conditioned venue with an ice-cold pina colada barely supported by one flopping hand, and occasionally being doused in soda water when the bar staff think I'm starting to steam.
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:55, Reply)
The mental image is making grin like a lunatic.
And teapotting is fucking hilarious, if I do say so myself.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:05, Reply)
holy fucker!
that's fucken sweet
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:43, Reply)
It's better in real life, too.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:46, Reply)
I would've shit myself if I got something like that when I was a kid.
my barbie house was a set of shelves like this, but quarter of that size, and I had to paint it myself.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)
Did you grow up Dickensian England?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
I am pretty sure she'll like it.
Plus if I am completely honest, I am well pleased that it fucking SHITS ALL OVER the spoilt girl upstairs' doll's house.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)

am well pleased that it fucking have enjoyed several Tayyabs-induced
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:01, Reply)
oh, dad

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:02, Reply)
It sounds pathetic I know,
but he buys my daughter more presents than I do and I don't like it.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:07, Reply)
what? why?

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:10, Reply)
Why does he buy her the presents or why don't I like it?
if a) my kid sees a lot of his, she's spoilt rotten and he's very rich so he buys my kid stuff so it doesn't look so bad him getting his kid a new toy every two minutes

If b) I don't agree with it. Even with unlimited funds i would still like my daughter to appreciate what she has and to learn to wait for stuff, old-fashioned cunt that I am.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:25, Reply)
GAY

(PsychoChomp, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:45, Reply)
Where do you insert the batteries?

(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:47, Reply)
IN YOUR BUM

(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)


(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
Christ,
for a moment I thought my screen had been replaced with a mirror...
(LongJohnBaldry, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:58, Reply)
I asked someone this a while ago
They told me to 'stick them up my arse'. Tell you what, that John Venables is a right twat.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)
Up the little girl's arse.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)
this is a very amateur question, gonz
i am surprised at you
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:50, Reply)
Def getting

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)
+a lob on.
You nonce.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)
Def getting One for classroom

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:48, Reply)
Is that the kids version of Def Leppard?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
It's a Pop Will Eat Itself single I think.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSxcclOd4Rw&feature=fvst
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:54, Reply)
I love the Poppies.

(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:02, Reply)
Their cover of 'Beaver Patrol' was their best song.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:04, Reply)
I diodn't realise it was a cover
until I heard the original on the radio a while back.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Fri 19 Nov 2010, 15:06, Reply)
Ooh I like that.
That's excellent.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
As inspired by the Wewelsburg

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I've spotted the Obergruppenführersaal

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)
My favourite castle of ALL TIME.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:53, Reply)
Hopefully it's got an add-on concentration camp for her next birthday
That'll give you the time to explain the benefits of the final solution
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:55, Reply)
Monty - your mission for tonight.
Play the Hendrix box-set at full volume.
Set up castle.
Make catapult using elastic bands and sticks.
Soak balls of paper in lighter fuel.
Take industrial strength MDs.
'Siege' the castle by surrounding it with your army (use album covers for regiments).
Hide behind sofa (bring wine and cheese in case it is a prolonged siege) and watch the castle using reversed binoculars.
Let the drugs kick in and the mayhem commence.
Wake up late morning full of regret and massive self loathing.
Clean up mess.
Cry/Lord's Prayer/Absolution wank.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:49, Reply)
That is the best plan I've heard since 'The Final Solution'

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:50, Reply)
Wasn't that a single by Europe?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:59, Reply)
Dr I think I love you.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:50, Reply)
GIMME THE NEWS!

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
It's like he can see into my mind/flat

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:51, Reply)
What?
No I can't.
*hides webcam*
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Fri 19 Nov 2010, 14:52, Reply)

« Go Back | See The Full Thread

Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1