About 30 years ago
I was learning to program my ZX81, and I wrote a random number generator because I had lost the dice to a board game. However, 9 times out of 10, it generated the number three.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 16:12, 13 replies)

Bognor Station
As a train arrived, the tannoy spake thusly:

"British Rail would like to inform passengers that the train arriving on platform one is on fire. You are advised not to join this service".

I love the "advised" -- the final decision is, of course, up to you.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 15:52, 7 replies)

my first experience of weird
On a warm summers afternoon waiting on West Ewell station for a train to Guildford I was just relaxing watching the world go by and watching the trains come and go (no I was not a trainspotter).
When a train pulled into the opposite platform my attention was taken by the length of time it was in the station and by the high level of noise, when the train pulled out I was greeted by the spectacle of about 50 guys in 1st Century Roman Legionaries uniform complete with swords and shields (no spears probably a bit tricky getting them on the train).
They were lined up in pairs and were matching off the platform, to this day I still wonder.
Another odd one was back in 1968 I was coming back across Parliament Hill to Hampstead at about 5am on Sunday morning when I saw a guy walking what appeared to be a fully grown leopard with a collar and lead, he even said good morning to me? I know I wasn't dreaming my mate saw it as well.
(raith50, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 15:28, 2 replies)

Can't see that anyone's mentioned it...
...but the shark in the roof of the house in Headington, Oxford.

Quite out of the ordinary when taking a bus into Oxford through Headington to see this poking out of a roof down an otherwise innocuous residential street.

And also annoying having to explain to my son everytime we go into Oxford that, no, the shark didn't swim into the roof...
(SonoraAeroClub "OH SWEET HELEN OF BALLS!", Wed 27 Apr 2011, 14:24, 4 replies)

Space ships..........
I once saw a spaceship change into random objects (or a list of fineite possible objects) the most "random" of which was Douglas Adams head...

que bashing about movie
( tim1701 I have no board signature!!!!!, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 14:11, 23 replies)

Carved into the wall
in big capital letters in a pub toilet in Cambridge:

K I N G

F A R T S
(Dr Skagra glorious glargzhem, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 13:39, 1 reply)

ive always wondered
how does a pair of shoes end up entangled with a phone line above a street.

Not only is it difficult to do, but it usually looks like its been tied on too.

Anyone else see shoes tied to phone lines?
(Dan dan dan They tik urh jerbs!!!, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 11:50, 10 replies)

I've always wanted to see a sheep stuck up a tree.
Preferably in a town.
(oneinthepink is at your cervix m'lady, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 11:15, 6 replies)

Backwards walking man - but why???
There is a man who I have seen a few times while waiting for the bus who walks backwards from the shops.

I filmed it on my phone and you can see evidence of his strange ritual here www.youtube.com/watch?v=TtrA045SQY8

Weird!
( camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 10:50, 8 replies)

Within eyesight of my flat
there is a bus stop. Nothing out of the ordinary there, except yesterday it had a rakish new addition in the form of a bicycle on top of it. Even that wouldn't be that weird normally, being as how I'm within two minutes of both a high school and a university, and if it wasn't some drunken students being ridiculous it was some school bullies stealing a kid's bike and putting where (s)he couldn't reach it.

No, what marks this out is that the bicycle in question is upright on top of the bus stop, as if parked. Someone has got up there and gone to some real and significant effort just to make people walk past and go "eh?". This sort of pride in one's work meets with my approval.
(StapMyVitals wouldn't mind a bit of that, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 10:48, 5 replies)

Half naked Tai Chi Man in the New Forest
I was having a weekend of stealth camping and hiking in the New Forest with my Dad. Miles from anywhere. We rounded a corner and found a hairy, bearded man wearing only boxershorts and glasses doing Tai Chi on a blanket by the path.
(Strangechap I look normal on the outside..., Wed 27 Apr 2011, 10:45, Reply)

And I turned the corner and there were batmen everywhere....
As I strolled to see Paul Weller do a gig in Bournemouth about 10 years ago, I walked along the cliffs to the end of the pier and stumbled across a group of at least 50 men dressed as batman.

This included old men, various shapes and sizes and there were some who had their glasses on over their masks.

And there was one Robin.

I have no idea why, what they were doing etc, but it was really really odd.
( camp freddy well, would you look at that!, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 10:43, 4 replies)

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 10:01, 8 replies)

Played a gig...
...in Southampton. We were double booked with a "Norwegian Cheese Festival" but played anyway. The place was full of drunk Norwegians. On one of the curtains a pair of socks had been pinned with a long pin with a small paper Norwegian flag on it. This was the complete sum of decoration.
(Demis CousCous, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 9:53, 5 replies)

On the grass beside the sidewalk

(Perv With A Dog had his eyes pecked out by scrub jays on, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 9:18, 8 replies)

Exchanging glances
Don't know if this qualifies, but I have a brother two years younger and we grew up in the desert, so often while in the car, we'd drive with the windows down. Once we pulled up next to a stop light next to a pretty girl with her car window down as well, in the next lane.

Still don't know why I did it, but I looked over at her and with full lungs yelled, "Hey!" My brother turned to lookat why I was yelling at the same time she looked over, somewhat startled to see why in the hell she was being yelled at.

Their eyes met. He whipped his head around and said, "Go, get out of here, drive!" The light was still red so we sat there for an uncomfortable few moments while he muttered, "bastard, bastard, bastard" under his breath.

Never done it since, but he was really pissed off at me laughing like a loon as soon as she sped away with a little chirp of her tires.
( BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 3:47, Reply)

Deal or no Deal
Thats pretty random
(insomniac-surfer oh go on then, just this once, Wed 27 Apr 2011, 0:35, 4 replies)

After a messy night out, I left my phone in a taxi.
I phoned the company and yes, they had it. My pal was up from England and he loves a bit of the old Nazi based patter whenever we meet up. Anyways, we drive down to the taxi place in Johnstone, a very tired and grim town in Scotland. It is a Sunday about 5pm and the town centre is dead.

When all of a sudden a youth of about 11/12 literally goosesteps round the corner, complete with an inch of black electricians tape on his top lip. Yes, he even had a Hitles 'tache. He Seig Heil'd his way right down the high street, he wasn't laughing, or fooling about or even put out, it seemed like the most normal thing in the world for him.

We just looked at each other in shocked glee, too cuntstruck to even take a photo.
(Cancer Joy was short lived, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 22:52, Reply)

No real story...
...so heres a dream i had a couple of years ago, i kept a dream log at that point to see if there were any pattens in the random rubbish i was dreaming at that time. There wasn't.



The earliest part i remember was being on a tour around an industrial instillation with two men who were rowing over what to have for lunch, one was throwing madelines around as he spoke. We all took notes about what we were being told up until the industrial equipment surrounding us became a supermarket. The two arguing parties started blaming each other for not making any notes so being a gent i told them i would photocopy mine, and walked out to find a photocopier.

The supermarket had employed two bouncers that i passed on my way, i mean to call out "see you next year" but it came out "i'll marry you next year". Being hard, massive bouncer types they came over to question me over what i mean while in the background a golden retriever used a rope to get up a small cliff to see its master. One of the bouncers had lost an eye and so stapled his eyelid shut.

Bit of a blur as to what happened next but i made it home, it was now the middle of the night so i walked the dog, bumped into some friends on a bridge to which the dog went apeshit and bolted across the road into the oncoming traffic that swerved about in avoidance as she did circles across the lanes. This wen't on for far too long until i realised i should do something so ran in myself, grabber her by the collar and started having a conversation with everyone about Ridley's (from Metroid) new career as a singer.

Got home, the house had become a hotel room that upon entrance had become a nicely furnished cell. The TV was on, a very fat woman was plugging her program where she looked at old pine trees with Jo Brand. I then realised i had brought a hummingbird and the massive drooping flowers behind me didn't have enough nectar for it, it landed on my hand and i wandered why it had grown by 3 or four foot.

Puzzled about what i was going to do about it, a guard inspector banged on the door, instead of talking through it tho, there was a little keyboard that they had to type in that spoke it out in Stephen Hawking's electronic voice. The message was something along the lines of me having the heating on too hot and that bugs might get in as a result. One immediately did. it had a napkin ring as a body, I threw the bird at it and it pounced at me, waking me up.
(MaxZero ZeroMax, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 21:44, 2 replies)

A Very Polite Man
walked into my school today, looked in the skip, came to reception and asked if he could have the pallet off the top. Being equally polite, I told him that he may. He balanced it precariously on his bike and pushed off. Literally.

Random!
( The Lone Groover has mal des nuts., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 21:21, 7 replies)

Every single
persons username on this website, bar maybe Rob...
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 21:11, 35 replies)

We'll never know.
Myself and my Uncle were taking a walk on the moor, seeing if we could find any creatures that were too tasty to live.

About 25 yards from the track we came across something unusual, an upright fridge freezer standing alone among the peat cuttings. Why would somebody dump an upright fridge freezer in the middle of the moor? Weird!

Anyway, we quickly did what any sane person would in that situation, we shot it about 15 times.

Before then end of the next day word got back to us that Donald McDonald, who only lived six houses away, was a furious because some vandals had destroyed his fridge. We denied all knowledge of the refrigerator shooting, despite the whole village knowing we'd gone out with our guns the day before.

The next time I saw DoDo he asked me if I knew anything about the incident. I looked him in the eye and lied. Then I asked him why his fridge was out on the moor, he paused for a second or two and walked away. A few people I know asked him the same question and the most anyone got out of him was "Oh, no reason".
( Ring Of Fire A petty, drooling belming butthurt retard., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 20:30, 3 replies)

This'll totally give away where I grew up, but
There was a woman in my home town known by the locals as Karaoke Karen who would regularly go to the town centre with a stereo and just start dancing in front of everyone shopping. At the time it was quite odd and rather random as to when she'd do it. As I've grown up I've actually grown quite jealous, I wish I was self confident and just didn't care what other people thought enough to start dancing away. There are enough nutters in my home town without adding another one in though!

Length? Roughly 3-5 minutes per song.

EDIT: Just found a video on youtube: www.youtube.com/watch?v=PLPe1grstCM
(Petite chien is going to do science to it, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 20:08, 6 replies)

As previously mentioned
I live beside the old psychiatric hospital and the residents are allowed roam free. My lovely wife who comes from foreign climes was unused to living in a small village that had a surplus of crazy peoples.

Anyways as Ireland long ago substituted public toilets with public houses my wife found herself at the bus-stop in need of some toilet relief. Popping into the local (and nice) pub she goes straight into the ladies. Upon opening the cubicle she suddenly finds herself faced with an elderly woman with a fag hanging from her mouth slouching on the toilet. To make matters worse she's wearing seven coats and has twice as many plastic bags filled with rubbish.

For that split second that my wife stands frozen the woman looks her in the eye with her beady raisin eyes and mutters around the fag, "Any sweeties?".

My wife held it in 'til she got home.
( dazbrilliantwhites has been meaning to change this..., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 19:46, Reply)

Sherlock Holmes the Dog
Driving home from the cinema with two friends, at about 11.30 at night, pitch black. On a deserted country road, miles from anywhere, walking down the road was a Basset hound, wearing a Sherlock Holmes 'deerstalker' type hat. Had to phone my mates the next day to confirm we hadn't dreamt it.
(kilt101, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 19:24, Reply)

In Guildford there is a man who has been seen in a park playing a trumpet and talking or shouting at trees(no,it's not me,i can't play the trumpet)
(The man they couldn't spang Got spanged on, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 19:13, Reply)

Only random if you're not Dutch.
I shared a hotel room with my missus early on in our relationship, and I did so in Amsterdam.
One morning she decided to do her hair and makeup whilst I stayed in bed watching TV. I ended up watching a strange Dutch TV program about some sort of priest figure and a bunch of black and white minstrels meeting some old woman and gaining some sort of approval. As a resident of the PC UK I was a little bemused by this broadcast, and mentioned it to the missus when she emerged from the bathroom.
We went out to look for lunch soon after, but found it a little tricky to get around as the streets were cordoned off and crowds were gathering.
We were standing beside one of the barriers and debating what to do when we heard a cheer from further down the cordoned-off road. Round the corner came a collection of blackened-faced people on roller skates, motorbike, bike, roller blades and various other forms of transport.
A little confused by this we made our way to a department store with a display in the window depicting a christmas scene. As we tried to read an information card half a dozen black-faced people abseiled down a nearby building and others emerged from the crowd to greet them.
Apparently we were witnessing Sinteklaas and his "companion" Zwarte Piet giving out goodies to the good kids and preparing to take the bad ones to Spain in a sack.
I've been to Spain and it's a nice enough country, but I'd rather not go there in a sack...
(Me, I'm not... in any way intoxicated, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 18:35, 3 replies)

Not random enough I fear.
I once had a dream where I woke up in bed at 9:00am, got up, rubbed my eyes, got up, rummaged around for some clothes, got dressed, wandered into the bathroom to brush my teeth, then went and sat on the couch in the front room and waited for the clock to roll round to 9:30 so I could get the bus to university.

I dreamt my entire morning routine which, ordinarily, would amount to the most mundane thing to dream about of all time. Except in this dream, I had SIDEBURNS.

Glorious bushy sideburns, stretching right down my face and joining my beard in some sort of orgy of facial hair wonderfulness.

Needless to say, I woke up and discovered I didn't have sideburns.

God, I wish I had sideburns.
( PMGT -Bacon., Tue 26 Apr 2011, 18:29, 9 replies)

Office xmas party oddness
Office xmas parties are often the cause of merriment and carnage, but this occurred right at the start, before alcohol had had time to play a part. We'd just arrived at the venue, in fact, and were on our first drink.

Now, we'd had some new people join recently, so mingling was being encouraged in order to get to know the new recruits. But it became apparent that one of them was missing. He was definitely with us when we left the office, but didn't appear to be in the bar.

After a short search he was located. He was sitting cross-legged on top of a phone box in the street outside the bar, smiling at passers-by. We never did get a coherent reason why.
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 17:40, Reply)

atdotslash's post just reminded me
driving to my mate's house last weekend, we came to a junction.
at the opposite set of traffic lights was a car, not moving, despite the green light. as we drove past it, we saw an elderly couple sitting in the front seats, having a full-on fist fight. they were really beating the crap out of each other. a younger woman, presumably their daughter, jumped out of the back seat and began running from one side of the car to the other, trying to make them stop.
i really wish we could have found out what they were fighting about.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Tue 26 Apr 2011, 17:39, 1 reply)