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Finnbar says: I used to know a guy who tattooed LOVE across his left knuckles, but didn't tattoo HATE on the other knuckles because he was right-handed and realised he couldn't finish. Ever run out of skills or inspiration halfway through a job?
( , Thu 24 Jun 2010, 13:32)
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I realise that this is true for most people in Britain, but foreign languages seem to elude me.
French was an ever present threat from my early days with my folks buying all manner of learning schemes aimed at turning me into the next Hilaire Belloc. I've tried my best to learn, I really have, but it just makes no sense to me. My French, in its entirety: Ou est le jambon? Le jambon est sur la plage. Great... THAT'LL get me out of some scrapes and no mistaking.
Then I tried German in school. Now this is a language I could really get along with as it's basically English but angrier and with longer words. I have learned one, useless word. Luftkissenboot. Unless I find myself stranded in the middle of the Black Forest in dire need of a hovercraft, this is unlikely to aide me in any way whatsoever.
Any really easy languages I could learn instead?
EDIT: Stop writing German at me! I don't understand it! Oh CHRIST! Well, now I'm just going to have to have a long sit down with Babelfish and sort this bloody mess out.
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 21:36, 29 replies)
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I developed a great relationship with a couple of austrians purely because i knew some quite unpleasant german phrases, and managed to pull a french bird with my semi-surreal pidgin-french
mind, last time i was in france, i ate only croque-monsieurs...
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 21:40, closed)
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"last time i was in france, i ate only croque-monsieurs"
Pfffffffffffffffahahahahahaha. That, my friend is an all too familiar tale. With the whole of Parisian dining at my disposal I spent a long weekend eating those feckers...
On the German front, I can actually add to that one word - Meine luftkissenboot ist windig und meine Klapperschlange ist kalt. Guaranteed to pull any surrealist German lady at the drop of a lobster.
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 21:46, closed)
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ich mochte gern dein hund sein
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 22:56, closed)
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Wo ist meiner Meerschweinschen? Ich möchte meiner Meerschweinchen!
(note: I have never owned a guinea pig, but shouting about one is a fantastic way to sound angry.)
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 13:32, closed)
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b3ta.com/questions/unfinishedbusiness/post766705
Ich mochte gern an deinen Busen rasten
Wie eine Kuh am Futterkasten
And prepare to get punched in the face...
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 23:10, closed)
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That made me giggle. It reminded me of all the pat phrases we learned for our French CSE exams. I am sure that all our essays read exactly the same.
Strange days indeed.
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 22:01, closed)
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then I realised what a stupid idea that was..
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 9:24, closed)
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I have discovered that it's difficult to type in scouse.
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 22:49, closed)
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doz i' chchome in polyesteh or nyyyyylon?
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 23:24, closed)
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airm.
'Well. airm, I know I was, airm, cchrap at the, airm, Wairld Cchup liycche, airm...'
Weeyne, airm, Rrrrrooney liycche
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 21:49, closed)
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Aber ich bin damit einverstanden; Deutsch und English sind sehr ähnlich. Es ist das einzige nicht-englische Sprache, die ich sprechen kann. (Ich hatte kein Französisch in der Schule gelernt.)
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 22:51, closed)
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Maybe all my linguistic ability was hoovered up by accents...?
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 23:22, closed)
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Don't even try. I speak french and spent 2 years one-2-one learning the Portugese language. Been there too. Dont bother, you will never get it right.
French is easier, spanish is better, but you have to have learnt latin to understand it. then you have to learn the culture. its important.
Hope this helps
Tiggy
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 23:04, closed)
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fluent Portuguese, but it took 10 years of living in Brazil to do it.
And to be honest, I still sound like a refugee from 'allo allo.
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 11:09, closed)
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haben Sie festgestellt, dass babelfish nicht mit Resultate sehr natürlich-klingen aufkommt.
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 23:07, closed)
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Speaking German can sound good as it makes you sound like a hardcase. Slovak or any other Baltic language for that matter takes it to a whole new level.
Want to woo a lady? Forget French, use Romanian. Trust me.
( , Tue 29 Jun 2010, 23:44, closed)
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As Martin Luther once said: Ich habe einen kleinen problemo, avec deiso religionie...
So there.
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 8:00, closed)
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she was single, beautiful, 25 years old and had a good job - but that story will wait for another day.
However, during my 3 months in the country, my Italian improved no end. It had to, as she spoke no English whatsoever.
Can hardly remember any of it now. Lack of use, plain laziness and it'll no longer help me get my end away.
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 9:03, closed)
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Und dein vater roch nach holunderberen
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 9:18, closed)
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Is a reasonably successful pick up line for me. Just learn some totally random and utterly useless phrase in a foreign language and you're home and dry.
( , Wed 30 Jun 2010, 19:21, closed)
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