fuck off
I go and eat foooood and this is the best you can come up with?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:51, archived)
I go and eat foooood and this is the best you can come up with?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:51, archived)
he's like the night-time baldmonkey
when he's not posting is when you worry.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:55, archived)
when he's not posting is when you worry.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:55, archived)
bored of that now
I've got a third and final interview for a job I want, and have been gardening as per the redundancy letter I recieved.
Today I chopped down a tree. What have you chopped down?
alt: Mono's bumhole.
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:22, archived)
I've got a third and final interview for a job I want, and have been gardening as per the redundancy letter I recieved.
Today I chopped down a tree. What have you chopped down?
alt: Mono's bumhole.
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:22, archived)
Did John Terry /really/ put his shin guards on to for the trophy presentation?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:26, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:26, archived)
He also rubbed some dirt onto his knees and splashed some water in his armpits
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:39, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:39, archived)
I reckon he also puts his full kit on when he's gonna shag someone elses wife or say something racist.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:35, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:35, archived)
Fuck, there's an owl outside and I'm gonna want to go to sleep soon.
How do you shut an owl up?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:47, archived)
How do you shut an owl up?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:47, archived)
and that's a long way from the most stupid thing he's ever done.
it's not even in the top 100.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:53, archived)
it's not even in the top 100.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:53, archived)
Good luck The LOVELY mr horrible.
I've not chopped down anything of late.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:26, archived)
I've not chopped down anything of late.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:26, archived)
you should try it
it's very liberating.
Though to be fair, I also planted a cherry tree near where that unsolicited monster had sprung up.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:28, archived)
it's very liberating.
Though to be fair, I also planted a cherry tree near where that unsolicited monster had sprung up.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:28, archived)
Don't encourage me.
You know that Gingezilla's not here to keep me in check anymore, it'll only end in tears and a pile of beheaded Ginges.
:D
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:30, archived)
You know that Gingezilla's not here to keep me in check anymore, it'll only end in tears and a pile of beheaded Ginges.
:D
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:30, archived)
how many times do they have to ask if you want the job?
i chopped some sniff earlier, it was over proof believe me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:29, archived)
i chopped some sniff earlier, it was over proof believe me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:29, archived)
the first time was the Operations Director sifting through CVs
the second was techie time with the IT Manager
the third is the MD having the final choice.
Peruvian flake?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:37, archived)
the second was techie time with the IT Manager
the third is the MD having the final choice.
Peruvian flake?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:37, archived)
well, it's a three interview process mongy, if you're applying
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:54, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:54, archived)
I bet he's answered an ad in a newsagent's window asking for people to write addresses on envelopes or something
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:37, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:37, archived)
the way I heard it, if you were to pull a chihuahua's bowels out and fry them in rancid emu oil then that would smell better than Jessica Alba's breath
and she has to shave every fifteen minutes or she gets 5 o'clock shadow on her tits
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:46, archived)
and she has to shave every fifteen minutes or she gets 5 o'clock shadow on her tits
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:46, archived)
I've just googled her and she looks like one of those plastic people
you'd do it, but only for pub conversation that nobody would believe because you're a fat mental with a parrot and a guitar.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:53, archived)
you'd do it, but only for pub conversation that nobody would believe because you're a fat mental with a parrot and a guitar.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:53, archived)
I'm technically still employed
but I don't have to work. And I get paid. BONUS.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:38, archived)
but I don't have to work. And I get paid. BONUS.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:38, archived)
they're paying me to fucking leave, I've taken the hint
thought I'd never get out of there.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:44, archived)
thought I'd never get out of there.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:44, archived)
three interviews means they're just fucking with you
maybe they'll ask you to sing something
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:41, archived)
maybe they'll ask you to sing something
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:41, archived)
Joking aside,
are you not a little bit pissed that they've been jerking you around? If the first two people can't offer you the job then they shouldn't be wasting your time by fetching you in for interviews. I'd be having a serious think about this shower of shite.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:55, archived)
are you not a little bit pissed that they've been jerking you around? If the first two people can't offer you the job then they shouldn't be wasting your time by fetching you in for interviews. I'd be having a serious think about this shower of shite.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:55, archived)
And then huff it and then run naked through mud and barbed wire high on your own shit and screaming?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:27, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:27, archived)
You wouldn't stand for it, I know.
The fuckers are taking the piss.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:28, archived)
The fuckers are taking the piss.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:28, archived)
As things stand I don't have a job come August.
Anyone wana giz a job?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:30, archived)
Anyone wana giz a job?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:30, archived)
see, that's another reason Moonraker's the best Bond film, someone makes a joke about "re-entry" while he's boffing some tart on the space shuttle
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:37, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:37, archived)
Roger Moore having sex is NOT a nice thought.
Although Jaws gets laid too in that one which is sweet.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:38, archived)
Although Jaws gets laid too in that one which is sweet.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:38, archived)
I bet you've got some dreamy gay drawing of Roger Moore and Jaws having manlove
and you squeeze a few drops of your watery spaff out of your winkie to it every night of the week
I bet that's what you do, you fucking sicken me you do
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:42, archived)
and you squeeze a few drops of your watery spaff out of your winkie to it every night of the week
I bet that's what you do, you fucking sicken me you do
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:42, archived)
I'm fairly certain that Jaws' girlfriend in that was an actual porn star.
And if that's not troo it oughtabe.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:45, archived)
And if that's not troo it oughtabe.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:45, archived)
"She also narrated Thomas le petit train, the French version of Thomas (the Tank Engine) and Friends."
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blanche_Ravalec
also, suck my chunks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:46, archived)
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blanche_Ravalec
also, suck my chunks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:46, archived)
That made more sense the second time I read it.
When I realised that it didn't say that she'd married Thomas le petit train.
Bed time I think.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:49, archived)
When I realised that it didn't say that she'd married Thomas le petit train.
Bed time I think.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 23:49, archived)
bored of that now
Film4, Rise of the Silver Surf ... ok, bored of that now, what film would you rather have a biro kicked down your ear than watch?
alt: haha, the big rock guy just got angry at the burny guy, that was pretty funny
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:33, archived)
Film4, Rise of the Silver Surf ... ok, bored of that now, what film would you rather have a biro kicked down your ear than watch?
alt: haha, the big rock guy just got angry at the burny guy, that was pretty funny
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:33, archived)
I need your clothes your boots and your motorcycle.
you have 10 seconds to comply.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:37, archived)
you have 10 seconds to comply.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:37, archived)
What's in the basket?
wherebadmovieslive.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/basketcase.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:20, archived)
wherebadmovieslive.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/basketcase.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:20, archived)
I don't go a lot on Michael Bay's new ET rehash, looks a bit shit tbh
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:52, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:52, archived)
they replay the blade movies on my shitty cable movie channel
what always strikes me is how easily Blade wins every fight. he efforlessly beats every single foe in all three movies. Even the boss fights at the end he only takes a few odd hits and easily triumphs. It's mostly him pounding or shooting everything in sight with perfectly executed moves and absolutely no drama or danger of him losing for the viewer.
It's the movie equivalent of playing call of duty in cheat mode where you can't be hit
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:52, archived)
what always strikes me is how easily Blade wins every fight. he efforlessly beats every single foe in all three movies. Even the boss fights at the end he only takes a few odd hits and easily triumphs. It's mostly him pounding or shooting everything in sight with perfectly executed moves and absolutely no drama or danger of him losing for the viewer.
It's the movie equivalent of playing call of duty in cheat mode where you can't be hit
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:52, archived)
I can barely remember a thing from any of those films because of this, no suspense or plot
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:55, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:55, archived)
comedies suck penguin dick, none of them are funny
except Schindler's List, that had a few good belly laughs
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:37, archived)
except Schindler's List, that had a few good belly laughs
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:37, archived)
I watched Dr Doolittle 2 with my son the other day
it was well lol because the animals could talk!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:44, archived)
it was well lol because the animals could talk!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:44, archived)
I'm watching the world is not enough, I can't remember what it's like
I don't have any biros
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:38, archived)
I don't have any biros
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:38, archived)
Roger Moore was the best Bond, Moonraker is the best Bond film, these are FACTS
F-A-C-T-S, FACTS
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:48, archived)
F-A-C-T-S, FACTS
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:48, archived)
Moonraker?
Pah.
It's ALL about You Only Live Twice Gilgy. And you KNOW IT you denty-brained parrot imaginer.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:17, archived)
Pah.
It's ALL about You Only Live Twice Gilgy. And you KNOW IT you denty-brained parrot imaginer.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:17, archived)
i just sampled 99 red ballons and 99 problems, mixed them, and deleted it, it was shit, why do i do this?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:39, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:39, archived)
FUCK OFF, I AM NOT FAT, NEVER HAVE BEEN NEVER WILL BE
MODDDDDSSSSSSSSSSSSSS11111111111111111111111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:53, archived)
MODDDDDSSSSSSSSSSSSSS11111111111111111111111111111!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:53, archived)
Victor von Doom has knocked the silver guy off his surfboard, shit's gonna get out of hand here
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:10, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:10, archived)
i've seen it, the silver surfer fella sacrifices himself, which he cant do, then they get married or sumat
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:13, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:13, archived)
seriously, how fucking shit stupid and boring is Jessica sodding Alba?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:15, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:15, archived)
I went through Didcot on Saturday.
Twice. I didn't think of him.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:18, archived)
Twice. I didn't think of him.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:18, archived)
it is appropriate that is is a disaster from beginning to end
why o why couldn't they both have drowned, preferably within the first ten minutes
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:42, archived)
why o why couldn't they both have drowned, preferably within the first ten minutes
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:42, archived)
I was shocked when the ship hit an iceberg, it was the last thing I was expecting.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:45, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:45, archived)
i fucking fed up of these motherfucking ice cubes on this boat
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:47, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:47, archived)
Impact Point
It's a disgrace to the already awful beach volleyball movie genre
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:43, archived)
It's a disgrace to the already awful beach volleyball movie genre
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:43, archived)
Cor, on the DVD cover you can see the top half of that lady's breasts
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:47, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:47, archived)
you know it's a good film when you read the cast list on imdb and you haven't heard of a single one of them before or since
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:50, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:50, archived)
I can only conclude that your Albaist attitude stems from some sort of gaymotism.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:33, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 22:33, archived)
bored of that now
so get this right, my sister-in-law bought these mini corn on the cob things for the parrot and it says microwave them until they pop so I'm like ok, in the microwave, pop pop pop this is fun then the fucking thing BURSTS INTO FUCKING FLAMES and ruins the fucking microwave and I'm giving it like lol wtf and the fan's on blowing air in and it stinks of burnt corn and I rescue one little bit of corn that looks ok and I give it to the parrot and the miserable cunt throws it on the floor, when did you last strangle one of your ungrateful pets?
alt: the muppets were shit and unfunny
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:32, archived)
so get this right, my sister-in-law bought these mini corn on the cob things for the parrot and it says microwave them until they pop so I'm like ok, in the microwave, pop pop pop this is fun then the fucking thing BURSTS INTO FUCKING FLAMES and ruins the fucking microwave and I'm giving it like lol wtf and the fan's on blowing air in and it stinks of burnt corn and I rescue one little bit of corn that looks ok and I give it to the parrot and the miserable cunt throws it on the floor, when did you last strangle one of your ungrateful pets?
alt: the muppets were shit and unfunny
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:32, archived)
you know what, if I was a parrot and my owner went to all that trouble then I'd eat the fucking popcorn even if it killed me stone fucking dead
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:39, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:39, archived)
I don't think your parrot really cares for you at all.
sorry gilgy :'(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:42, archived)
sorry gilgy :'(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:42, archived)
fuck that, I don't want burnt feathers in my tomato and marscapone sauce
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:52, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:52, archived)
Francis is holding you back, Bollocks Parrot
You should ditch him. Fast.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:58, archived)
You should ditch him. Fast.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:58, archived)
Fucking cat paw prints all over my fucking car again.
Imma plug the cunt in the mains tonight.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:35, archived)
Imma plug the cunt in the mains tonight.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:35, archived)
What's the best thing for getting burnt cat off the paintwork?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:36, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:36, archived)
I never claimed to be a professional.
srsly tho, it's getting beyond a joke. I'm going to rig something up to twat the cat fucker. I'll nail it's dripping carcass to the gate as a warning to other cats that walking on my car is not a bright move.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:45, archived)
srsly tho, it's getting beyond a joke. I'm going to rig something up to twat the cat fucker. I'll nail it's dripping carcass to the gate as a warning to other cats that walking on my car is not a bright move.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:45, archived)
see, you've got to catch them in the act or they never learn
sellotape the cat the the car then kick the living shit out of it
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:47, archived)
sellotape the cat the the car then kick the living shit out of it
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:47, archived)
I bet it's the one from next door.
I looked and there are never any paw prints on their car. Just mine. I might sit up one night with a spear gun.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:49, archived)
I looked and there are never any paw prints on their car. Just mine. I might sit up one night with a spear gun.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:49, archived)
save yourself the trouble
www.nwtrappers.com/catalog/proddetail.asp?prod=15BEAR
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:51, archived)
www.nwtrappers.com/catalog/proddetail.asp?prod=15BEAR
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:51, archived)
It might scratch the paint when its snaps shut.
I'm pretty sure I could rig something up that puts a charge through the body. I could use the outside light with the motion detector to issue 230v when triggered! Haha goodbye cunt cat!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:56, archived)
I'm pretty sure I could rig something up that puts a charge through the body. I could use the outside light with the motion detector to issue 230v when triggered! Haha goodbye cunt cat!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:56, archived)
bored now, imma go on imdb and give 1/10 ratings to films I haven't seen
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:58, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:58, archived)
He's the boss, he's a pip, he's the championship. He's the most tip top, Cunt Cat.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:57, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:57, archived)
i find forums at their best when they are thought provoking and inviting
shame
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:31, archived)
shame
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:31, archived)
nah, i'm not much of a moving water angler, i think i might of gone years ago
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:47, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:47, archived)
Yeah, he caught a 2 pound bluebottle!
That's the sort of awesome joke you get on the Muppets.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:48, archived)
That's the sort of awesome joke you get on the Muppets.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 20:48, archived)
a girl burnt microwave popcorn in a building i worked in and an entire bank was dead for nearly an hour
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:01, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 21:01, archived)
bored of that now
seriously though, if I thought I could get away with it then I'd kick a panda's face in, no hesitation, what would you do if no one was looking? other than dress up in your mum's underwear and wank in front of the mirror?
alt: blah fucking blah blah
etc etc
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:27, archived)
seriously though, if I thought I could get away with it then I'd kick a panda's face in, no hesitation, what would you do if no one was looking? other than dress up in your mum's underwear and wank in front of the mirror?
alt: blah fucking blah blah
etc etc
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:27, archived)
I'd quite like a chinese tonight
but after dihydrocodiene and diazepam I don't even give a fuck what's going on man
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:38, archived)
but after dihydrocodiene and diazepam I don't even give a fuck what's going on man
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:38, archived)
I'm listening to Alborosie
and I have absolutely no idea what he's banging on about, mon
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:50, archived)
and I have absolutely no idea what he's banging on about, mon
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:50, archived)
lol wtf, I forgot everyone here takes prescription anti-mental meds
alright Declan
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:19, archived)
alright Declan
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:19, archived)
It' not like any of these cunts are proper mental Gilgers.
How many of them have ever been sectioned?
Needy wankers.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:09, archived)
How many of them have ever been sectioned?
Needy wankers.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:09, archived)
thing is right
they ask you "would you like to stay in hospital as a voluntary patient?"
and you say "fuck off, I want to go home, I'm missing only fools and horses in here" and they say "HA! you're sectioned"
so yeah, that
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:34, archived)
they ask you "would you like to stay in hospital as a voluntary patient?"
and you say "fuck off, I want to go home, I'm missing only fools and horses in here" and they say "HA! you're sectioned"
so yeah, that
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:34, archived)
I'd kick in a Leonardo da Vinci painting.
I did once actually sneeze all over an uncovered da Vinci drawing... I hope in years to come some hopeless curator will try to explain why he used special speckled paper for that sketch.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:33, archived)
I did once actually sneeze all over an uncovered da Vinci drawing... I hope in years to come some hopeless curator will try to explain why he used special speckled paper for that sketch.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:33, archived)
are pandas interracial bears, when a polar and black bear get it on
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:52, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:52, archived)
if you've got nothing sensible to say then just keep quiet or start your own thread
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:56, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 18:56, archived)
now, y'see, I didn't want to break it to you like this
but really I am
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:08, archived)
but really I am
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:08, archived)
they deserve it, fucking aquatic shitty pretend rat beaver fucks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:35, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 19:35, archived)
bored of that now
anyone know the maximum first filter capacitor rating for a 5U4G rectifier tube?
alt: how hard do you reckon you could kick a flamingo before its legs snapped?
etc
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:29, archived)
anyone know the maximum first filter capacitor rating for a 5U4G rectifier tube?
alt: how hard do you reckon you could kick a flamingo before its legs snapped?
etc
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:29, archived)
Usually the capacitance value recommended in a tube data sheet is the maximum that should be used with a given type for good reliability. I would not go over 50uF under any circumstances and would recommend 30 - 40uF as reasonable values for the input capacitor based on my experience with this type.
Larger values may cause arcing during warm up and will also exceed the peak current rating of the rectifier. You can use more capacitance after the choke if you wish.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:30, archived)
you can use a higher capacitance with a choke input filter but yeah, about 40uF I reckon
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:34, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:34, archived)
I'd stab the young one in the face with the broken bottle.
If the bottle shatters I could probably take out the older one with my bare fists.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:35, archived)
If the bottle shatters I could probably take out the older one with my bare fists.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:35, archived)
yeah, go back to noodling on your bass like some sort of Tony Levin wannabe
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:44, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:44, archived)
your car went from white to black, it's a reverse michael jackson
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:36, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:36, archived)
I've saved up 25 years worth of Rice Krispies vouchers for some superwicked stickers.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:42, archived)
I imagine it will end up looking fairly similar to this
www.sanitaryum.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/flamejob.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:45, archived)
www.sanitaryum.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/flamejob.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:45, archived)
becuase it massively increases my likelihood of death by horrible injury
I don't want to wimp out with cancer or heart disease or any of those other pussy fatalities.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:41, archived)
I don't want to wimp out with cancer or heart disease or any of those other pussy fatalities.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:41, archived)
it'll look like this:
www.freewebs.com/mostwantedmotorsracing/me%20car!!.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:44, archived)
www.freewebs.com/mostwantedmotorsracing/me%20car!!.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:44, archived)
I love the heaps of shit you see round here
Where they've put 10 grands worth of body kit on a 300 quid Nova. And a blue light underneath. For fuck's sake.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:48, archived)
Where they've put 10 grands worth of body kit on a 300 quid Nova. And a blue light underneath. For fuck's sake.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:48, archived)
It's all about Stance these days
farm4.static.flickr.com/3355/3580517210_6b616e662d.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:50, archived)
farm4.static.flickr.com/3355/3580517210_6b616e662d.jpg
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:50, archived)
I'd much rather have a something that looks like a shit heap but accelerates very well.
And is as small as possible.
So there.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:51, archived)
And is as small as possible.
So there.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:51, archived)
now that's a fucking brilliant car, I can't imagine any car better than that
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:46, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:46, archived)
especially not Grrmachine's
I mean, his car is so shit I can't even be bothered to look at pictures of it
so that car's obviously the best
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:46, archived)
I mean, his car is so shit I can't even be bothered to look at pictures of it
so that car's obviously the best
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:46, archived)
someone told me that grrmachine loves beetles and his new car is a beetle and he spray painted it because he loves it so much
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:03, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:03, archived)
Act 16:3 Paul wanted to have him go on with him. And he took [him] and circumcised him because of the Jews who were in that region, for they all knew that his father was Greek.
I can't find any passages in the bible about capacitors I'm afraid, I don't think they'd been invented yet.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:33, archived)
I can't find any passages in the bible about capacitors I'm afraid, I don't think they'd been invented yet.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:33, archived)
Lev 12:6 'When the days of her purification are fulfilled, whether for a son or a daughter, she shall bring to the priest a lamb of the first year as a burnt offering, and a young pigeon or a turtledove as a sin offering, to the door of the tabernacle of meeting. If a pigeon cannot be found then a flamingo will suffice, once its legs have been sufficiently broken which would usually require around 50 minutes of sustained kicking with a heavy boot.'
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:38, archived)
I imagine that their legs aren't all that strong
But then maybe they are. What am I, a fucking flamingo doctor? Jesus. Do your own fucking research.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:39, archived)
But then maybe they are. What am I, a fucking flamingo doctor? Jesus. Do your own fucking research.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:39, archived)
Oh right
God, I'm sorry.
Ok, I reckon you could probably kick them about as hard as you'd kick a football if you were passing it to another player. Not too hard. Do they have hollow bones?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:43, archived)
God, I'm sorry.
Ok, I reckon you could probably kick them about as hard as you'd kick a football if you were passing it to another player. Not too hard. Do they have hollow bones?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:43, archived)
they do if you drill the middle out of their legs before you kick them
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:47, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:47, archived)
Call one of them a Pink Poof when they're on the angel dust
and they'll clean your clock
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:55, archived)
and they'll clean your clock
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:55, archived)
Is that right?
Well they look a bit like a hockey stick. I bet if you held onto their feet and swung them at someone's arm...yeah...yeah, I reckon you might break an arm. Nice work 2CC.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:44, archived)
Well they look a bit like a hockey stick. I bet if you held onto their feet and swung them at someone's arm...yeah...yeah, I reckon you might break an arm. Nice work 2CC.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:44, archived)
If anyone finds my will to live.
Can they post it back to me, or leave in a convenient location, ta.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:06, archived)
Can they post it back to me, or leave in a convenient location, ta.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:06, archived)
you know what would look good in this room, like a wooden panelled ceiling with those low voltage light things and dimmer switches
/ac
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:12, archived)
/ac
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 17:12, archived)
bored of that now
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of parrots, let us also lay aside every lung, and sin which clings so brightly, and let us run with lobsters the race that is set before us, looking to parrots, the flounder and perforation of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the crisps, despising the shame, and is seated at the right left right of the throne of God.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:13, archived)
Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of parrots, let us also lay aside every lung, and sin which clings so brightly, and let us run with lobsters the race that is set before us, looking to parrots, the flounder and perforation of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the crisps, despising the shame, and is seated at the right left right of the throne of God.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:13, archived)
Philippians 2:5-8
Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a bath tub on wheels.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:16, archived)
Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men. And being found in human form, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to the point of death, even death on a bath tub on wheels.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:16, archived)
Genesis 29:30
And he went in also unto Rachel, and he loved also Rachel more than Leah, and served with him yet seven other years.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:23, archived)
And he went in also unto Rachel, and he loved also Rachel more than Leah, and served with him yet seven other years.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:23, archived)
ikwwiiwa waakwia a awiiawkiwkk i akak kia ikiwakak wiwikaa akw awwka aa a ikkiwaakiwwkaiiwkwk wikaaaiw kai kw wkaii k i aai ka w kkaawakk k ikw iiakikiwiwaakkaiwiw aikaki wi wak aaw kwaiiwk kwaiwia a kak ikaakakaaia wwkkiia kkaw
waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in roflwaki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:15, archived)
waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl waki and also in rofl
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:15, archived)
Proverbs 20:9
Who can say, “I have made my heart pure;
I am clean from my sin”?
Bernard can. Say hello to Bernard.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:14, archived)
Who can say, “I have made my heart pure;
I am clean from my sin”?
Bernard can. Say hello to Bernard.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:14, archived)
here's something I've always wondered right
would bernard's watch stop jesus?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:15, archived)
would bernard's watch stop jesus?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:15, archived)
Let's consult the book itself:
Micah 6:8
He has told you, O man, what is good;
and what does the Lord require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
and to walk humbly with your God?
Also; Bernard's watch would only work on Jesus when he was in human mode.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:18, archived)
Micah 6:8
He has told you, O man, what is good;
and what does the Lord require of you
but to do justice, and to love kindness,
and to walk humbly with your God?
Also; Bernard's watch would only work on Jesus when he was in human mode.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:18, archived)
Leviticus 17:11
For the life of the flesh is in the blood; and I have given it to you upon the altar to make atonement for your souls: for it is the blood that maketh atonement by reason of the life. Also, ponies ARE baby horses.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:27, archived)
For the life of the flesh is in the blood; and I have given it to you upon the altar to make atonement for your souls: for it is the blood that maketh atonement by reason of the life. Also, ponies ARE baby horses.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:27, archived)
Deut. 23: 1
No man whose testicles have been crushed or whose organ has been cut off may become a member of the assembly of God.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:15, archived)
No man whose testicles have been crushed or whose organ has been cut off may become a member of the assembly of God.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:15, archived)
Proverbs 12:1
Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge,
but he who hates bdsm is stupid.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:18, archived)
Whoever loves discipline loves knowledge,
but he who hates bdsm is stupid.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:18, archived)
Ezekiel 23:19-20 NET
Yet she increased her prostitution, remembering the days of her youth when she engaged in prostitution in the land of Egypt. She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.
PHWOAR!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:21, archived)
Yet she increased her prostitution, remembering the days of her youth when she engaged in prostitution in the land of Egypt. She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.
PHWOAR!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:21, archived)
Revelation 3:20
Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat him, and he withers me.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:20, archived)
Behold, I stand at the door and knock. If anyone hears my voice and opens the door, I will come in to him and eat him, and he withers me.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:20, archived)
i've lost track, somebody press reset and leave me in the garden for a bit
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:24, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:24, archived)
Deuteronomy 21:9
So shalt thou put away the innocent blood from the midst of thee, when thou shalt do that which is right in the eyes of Jehovah. Like showing us your tits.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:29, archived)
So shalt thou put away the innocent blood from the midst of thee, when thou shalt do that which is right in the eyes of Jehovah. Like showing us your tits.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:29, archived)
bored of that now
so my brother's given me this book about Stalin and I looked at it and srsly, it's like 720 pages and I'm like woah, wtf, I might die halfway through reading that so I've looked at the pictures and now I know everything about Stalin, when did you last oh I don't fucking know, poke an iguana in the pancreas with a feather duster?
alt: he had a moustache
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
so my brother's given me this book about Stalin and I looked at it and srsly, it's like 720 pages and I'm like woah, wtf, I might die halfway through reading that so I've looked at the pictures and now I know everything about Stalin, when did you last oh I don't fucking know, poke an iguana in the pancreas with a feather duster?
alt: he had a moustache
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
I don't see why people bother with anything other that wikipedia
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:06, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:06, archived)
if you do the simple english one they are only small words though
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:10, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:10, archived)
Nothing wrong with old Stalin
had a few good ideas, had a few bad ones. No one is perfect.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:13, archived)
had a few good ideas, had a few bad ones. No one is perfect.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:13, archived)
just interviewed a woman called Fanny Ono
I'm thinking of offering her the job based on the comedic potential
{edit} here she is: wikiworldbook.com/global-address-book/Fanny-Ono
face like cartman, but she's quite a good seller
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:38, archived)
I'm thinking of offering her the job based on the comedic potential
{edit} here she is: wikiworldbook.com/global-address-book/Fanny-Ono
face like cartman, but she's quite a good seller
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:38, archived)
Alphabet, Alphabet
The nicest letters you'll ever get
From A-Z I get my fix
And my favourite number is 26!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:46, archived)
The nicest letters you'll ever get
From A-Z I get my fix
And my favourite number is 26!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:46, archived)
Do you think that in the newsletter Rob could start putting in what letters and number B3ta was brought to us by today?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:05, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:05, archived)
to be fair, it looks pretty.
but it's expensive and i was surprised to see the building owned by the software house i was visiting covered in graffiti. this was 15 minutes from bergen city centre and is apparently rife. plus, norwegians, right?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:49, archived)
but it's expensive and i was surprised to see the building owned by the software house i was visiting covered in graffiti. this was 15 minutes from bergen city centre and is apparently rife. plus, norwegians, right?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:49, archived)
I paid about £100 for flight and a week's accommodation in Bergen.
Beer Everything else was expensive though.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:51, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:51, archived)
it's up to about nine quid a pint now.
plus i ordered room service at the airport hotel and they charged fifteen quid just to bring it to my room. thank the lord for obscure receipts and a company credit card.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:52, archived)
plus i ordered room service at the airport hotel and they charged fifteen quid just to bring it to my room. thank the lord for obscure receipts and a company credit card.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:52, archived)
I stayed in my mate's flat near Bryggen
Helped keep the costs down.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:54, archived)
Helped keep the costs down.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:54, archived)
I KNOW, SIR! I KNOW!!!
i just watched super 8. it was rather good.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:51, archived)
i just watched super 8. it was rather good.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:51, archived)
Oh, I have that movie but I've not watched it
Based on this sparkling and concice review perhaps I'll give it a look.
How you getting on, love?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:54, archived)
Based on this sparkling and concice review perhaps I'll give it a look.
How you getting on, love?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:54, archived)
It's in the top issues for an incontinent prick like janet? (4)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:01, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:01, archived)
meh. scar on my shoulder has yet another infection.
husband is in southampton all week. i am BORED. but yes, watch super 8. it's obviously derivative of goonies and ET and all those criticisms but i really enjoyed it.
more news as it happens.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:01, archived)
husband is in southampton all week. i am BORED. but yes, watch super 8. it's obviously derivative of goonies and ET and all those criticisms but i really enjoyed it.
more news as it happens.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:01, archived)
Booo
Have you considered amputation? I'm not sure how you'd amputate a shoulder, but it's worth thinking about.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:03, archived)
Have you considered amputation? I'm not sure how you'd amputate a shoulder, but it's worth thinking about.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:03, archived)
I got bored within the first 20 minutes and stopped watching it.
Soz.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:03, archived)
Soz.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:03, archived)
It wasn't supposed to be
I have an healthy interest in the geography of defunct european countries.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:00, archived)
I have an healthy interest in the geography of defunct european countries.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:00, archived)
No, I'd say that's pretty unlikely, Glued
Firstly Oslo is in Norway, secondly Czechoslovakia doesn't really exist anymore. There was a terrible conflict where the country was divided into Slovakia and the Czech Republic.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:57, archived)
Firstly Oslo is in Norway, secondly Czechoslovakia doesn't really exist anymore. There was a terrible conflict where the country was divided into Slovakia and the Czech Republic.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:57, archived)
I got an email from a south american colleague called Lino Patino the other day
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:44, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:44, archived)
oh god we nearly had a crew member called:
norman jay jesus p pimping. he was like a dream come true. and those crazy thais...
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:50, archived)
norman jay jesus p pimping. he was like a dream come true. and those crazy thais...
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:50, archived)
A friend of mine happened across a child named Precious Reefer.
True story.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:58, archived)
True story.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:58, archived)
I'm listening to Vangelis.
Does anyone else want to sit in a darkened room feeling sore and bitter, drinking whisky while neon lights and Chinese adverts strobe in through the windows when they hear his music?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:49, archived)
Does anyone else want to sit in a darkened room feeling sore and bitter, drinking whisky while neon lights and Chinese adverts strobe in through the windows when they hear his music?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:49, archived)
Not really.
When I hear Vangelis I usually want to switch it off and listen to something else.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:52, archived)
When I hear Vangelis I usually want to switch it off and listen to something else.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:52, archived)
I find it ideal for working to when I don't want the sound of my own thoughts churning in my head
but don't want to listen, as such, to music.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:54, archived)
but don't want to listen, as such, to music.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:54, archived)
I've never listened to either.
Is this a recommendation, because if it backfires you'll never hear the end of it.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:59, archived)
Is this a recommendation, because if it backfires you'll never hear the end of it.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:59, archived)
Wasn't meant as such but…
If you haven't heard of either I'd say you were missing out. Depends on whether you like good ambient music I guess.
Make your own mind up- Sigur Ros; Boards of Canada.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
If you haven't heard of either I'd say you were missing out. Depends on whether you like good ambient music I guess.
Make your own mind up- Sigur Ros; Boards of Canada.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
friends of mr cairo album makes me cry.
in a good way, i mean.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:53, archived)
in a good way, i mean.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:53, archived)
it must have been a difficult birth
tears (the thigns that come out your eyes)
tears (like when you get an episiotomy or rip something)
LOL!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:00, archived)
tears (the thigns that come out your eyes)
tears (like when you get an episiotomy or rip something)
LOL!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:00, archived)
Jon's vocal are always good, apart from a few misses on Yes albums.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:58, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:58, archived)
wait, jon off of jon and vangelis is jon anderson?
mind. blown. how did i not know this?!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
mind. blown. how did i not know this?!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
'his' not 'them'.
Mind you he is Greek, so now is the time for him to form a band, as with such high unemployment he can pay low wages to a grateful workforce.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
Mind you he is Greek, so now is the time for him to form a band, as with such high unemployment he can pay low wages to a grateful workforce.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:04, archived)
Today I have been mostly quoting the Bible.
2 Kings 2:23-24
He [Elisha] went up from there to Bethel; and while he was going up on the way, some small boys came out of the city and jeered at him, saying, “Go away, baldhead! Go away, baldhead!” When he turned around and saw them, he cursed them in the name of the LORD. Then two she-bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:03, archived)
2 Kings 2:23-24
He [Elisha] went up from there to Bethel; and while he was going up on the way, some small boys came out of the city and jeered at him, saying, “Go away, baldhead! Go away, baldhead!” When he turned around and saw them, he cursed them in the name of the LORD. Then two she-bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the boys.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:03, archived)
That's a lot of mauling.
You would have thought that most of the boys would have run away when they saw their friends being mauled- unless they were part of some bear-worshipping suicide cult. Who determined they were she-bears? How difficult is it to tell the gender of a bear? I would imagine it's a tricky business if you aren't another bear and even then not without inherent hazards.
Could of course be allegorical and perhaps the number 42 has some deep cosmic significance- unlikely though.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:08, archived)
You would have thought that most of the boys would have run away when they saw their friends being mauled- unless they were part of some bear-worshipping suicide cult. Who determined they were she-bears? How difficult is it to tell the gender of a bear? I would imagine it's a tricky business if you aren't another bear and even then not without inherent hazards.
Could of course be allegorical and perhaps the number 42 has some deep cosmic significance- unlikely though.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:08, archived)
I hadn't thought of that.. maybe Elisha had persuaded the bears to do his bidding...
sexually
and that's how he knew they were female.
I think 42 was decided on as being suitably impressive but not so over the top that people wouldn't believe it.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:12, archived)
sexually
and that's how he knew they were female.
I think 42 was decided on as being suitably impressive but not so over the top that people wouldn't believe it.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:12, archived)
What is the meaning of life, the universe and everything?
Google knows.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:20, archived)
Google knows.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:20, archived)
James 4:7
Submit yourselves therefore to Cadbury. Resist the Nestlé, and he will flee from you.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 16:10, archived)
Who are you?
You're not Quinten. Who are you and what have you done with Quinten?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:05, archived)
You're not Quinten. Who are you and what have you done with Quinten?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:05, archived)
i am so the real quinten, why won't you believe me
:((((((((((((
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:05, archived)
:((((((((((((
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:05, archived)
but i was quentin before i was quinten but then i got used to quentin so i'm quentin again now
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:07, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:07, archived)
i wasn't saying i was good, i was making the sign to prove i'm me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:12, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:12, archived)
The real quinten would never have made the quinten is good sign himself.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:13, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:13, archived)
damn, rumbled
before i could get my hands on Q's loot as well
(scarpers)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:14, archived)
before i could get my hands on Q's loot as well
(scarpers)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:14, archived)
I've just seen how upset conrad quioxe was with me.
This makes me happy.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:10, archived)
This makes me happy.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:10, archived)
"oh do fuck off" is to be read in the same voice as
"in my humble opinion"
"just a thought" and
"i think you'll find"
it's the sort of thing only said by people who SNE whenever they believe they've been funny.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:15, archived)
"in my humble opinion"
"just a thought" and
"i think you'll find"
it's the sort of thing only said by people who SNE whenever they believe they've been funny.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:15, archived)
z z z
EDIT: Actually, I retract my 'z z z' in favour of a 'huzzah'.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:19, archived)
EDIT: Actually, I retract my 'z z z' in favour of a 'huzzah'.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:19, archived)
Kelly was a slag and Jessie had no sense of humour
Which leaves Lisa. She was a bit thick, but pretty enough. So I guess my answer is Lisa.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:18, archived)
Which leaves Lisa. She was a bit thick, but pretty enough. So I guess my answer is Lisa.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:18, archived)
quentin is not a comedy account, i just changed my name to be hilarious like baldmonkey
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:19, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:19, archived)
I like her.
I liked her a lot in Max Payne when she wore tight clothes. There was little else to like in that film though.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:28, archived)
I liked her a lot in Max Payne when she wore tight clothes. There was little else to like in that film though.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:28, archived)
it's not great
watch someone play the games instead. you'll enjoy that more
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:33, archived)
watch someone play the games instead. you'll enjoy that more
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:33, archived)
i liked the first one, didn't play the second one and the third one seems to be about cowboys
why is that?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:33, archived)
why is that?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:33, archived)
i liked the first and second ones and i think you might be mistaken about the third
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:39, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:39, archived)
we had a barbecue this weekend that descended into madness pretty quickly
tonight i'm hoping to play some infamous 2
what have you been up to?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:37, archived)
tonight i'm hoping to play some infamous 2
what have you been up to?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:37, archived)
Man, I love a bit of madness
Not much. Nothing good anyway. Hopefully seeing Avengers this weekend, so that's something.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:42, archived)
Not much. Nothing good anyway. Hopefully seeing Avengers this weekend, so that's something.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:42, archived)
gawd, everyone is sick of the avengers now
you're too late. go and see men in black 3 instead
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:43, archived)
you're too late. go and see men in black 3 instead
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:43, archived)
GRRR
Nah, I'm going to wait a while for that one. I want to see it, but I don't think I need to see it at the cinema.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:47, archived)
Nah, I'm going to wait a while for that one. I want to see it, but I don't think I need to see it at the cinema.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 15:47, archived)
What's the difference between something said so angrily it is sibilant, and Adam?
One is madly sissed and the other is sadly missed.
Your go. What's the difference betweens for b3tans.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:27, archived)
One is madly sissed and the other is sadly missed.
Your go. What's the difference betweens for b3tans.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:27, archived)
What's the difference between a World Of Logs labourer and baldmonkey?
One is a WOL Lacky the other is lolwaki.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:31, archived)
One is a WOL Lacky the other is lolwaki.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:31, archived)
What's the difference between a hairpiece with the fifth letter of the alphabet stuck to it with a drawing pin and a cock-munching shitterchief?
One's a pinned-"e" wig and the other's a Windy Pig.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:33, archived)
One's a pinned-"e" wig and the other's a Windy Pig.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:33, archived)
now hang on,
i'm not standing for this sort of bullying, I might go join adam on OT
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:26, archived)
i'm not standing for this sort of bullying, I might go join adam on OT
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:26, archived)
This thread is shit,
I'd start a new one, but i'm going out in like 15 mins and can't commit to it. Also you're shit, and you're music is shit, and you are a bully, and your poetry is sub-par, and your music can only be described as cacophonous, and you're face is a bit round, and I'm pretty sure you can't grow side-burns.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:31, archived)
I'd start a new one, but i'm going out in like 15 mins and can't commit to it. Also you're shit, and you're music is shit, and you are a bully, and your poetry is sub-par, and your music can only be described as cacophonous, and you're face is a bit round, and I'm pretty sure you can't grow side-burns.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:31, archived)
are you comparing BM to a baby randomly smashing it's fists on a toy piano?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:34, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:34, archived)
nah,
more like a hundred people having a watery shit into differing levels of water.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
more like a hundred people having a watery shit into differing levels of water.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
bored of that now.
you know when you stand outside a school in a trenchcoat, waiting for playtime to begin but then someone spots you and you have run to run away quickly in case they call the police, when was the last time you blah blah, etc
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:40, archived)
you know when you stand outside a school in a trenchcoat, waiting for playtime to begin but then someone spots you and you have run to run away quickly in case they call the police, when was the last time you blah blah, etc
pricks
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:40, archived)
Come to the dark side.
We're much nicer and there's 87% less baldmonkey.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:39, archived)
We're much nicer and there's 87% less baldmonkey.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:39, archived)
FUCK OFF BACK TO /QOTW YOU SHIT EATING CUNT.
Nah, you're alright really.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:41, archived)
Nah, you're alright really.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:41, archived)
As are you.
Hence the invite. y'know, if all-baldmonkly-0all-the-time ever gets fucking tedious.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:44, archived)
Hence the invite. y'know, if all-baldmonkly-0all-the-time ever gets fucking tedious.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:44, archived)
what's the difference between Veronica Moser doing a porn shoot on the Thames flood barrier and Gonzo?
one shits in a barrier shag and the other shits in a carrier bag
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:34, archived)
one shits in a barrier shag and the other shits in a carrier bag
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:34, archived)
What's the difference between a booth which is ideal for collapsing in and spangolin?
One's a slumpable hut and the other's a humpable slut.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:36, archived)
One's a slumpable hut and the other's a humpable slut.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:36, archived)
What's the difference between a bebop pub named after a group of primates and mark morrison's prison shoes?
One's a boppy inn called "Monkey" and the other is copying baldmonkey.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:39, archived)
One's a boppy inn called "Monkey" and the other is copying baldmonkey.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:39, archived)
imma gonna stop taking my pills and shout bongo at some geese now.
I PISED ON A ORKESTRA!!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:08, archived)
I PISED ON A ORKESTRA!!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:08, archived)
What's the difference between leaping at someone to deliver a light smack and mmps?
One's a pouncing flick and the other is a flouncing prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:11, archived)
One's a pouncing flick and the other is a flouncing prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:11, archived)
what's the difference between amelia earhart and baldmonkey
one's a dead flyer and the other is a fucking liar.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:16, archived)
one's a dead flyer and the other is a fucking liar.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:16, archived)
What's the difference between trying to jump over a massive wheat yield on a motorbike and mmps?
One's a croppy stunt and the other's a stroppy cunt.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:23, archived)
One's a croppy stunt and the other's a stroppy cunt.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:23, archived)
what's the difference between a dodgy carry out and baldmonkey
one will make you sick the other's a fucking dick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:25, archived)
one will make you sick the other's a fucking dick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:25, archived)
what's the difference between a jamaican priest giving a benediction and janet?
one says jah bless and the other's a fat mess.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:31, archived)
one says jah bless and the other's a fat mess.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:31, archived)
I know, I'm not really feeling it BM.
I dunno, something about luxemburg, landlocked and dreadlocks.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:29, archived)
I dunno, something about luxemburg, landlocked and dreadlocks.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:29, archived)
What's the difference between bending your leg while waving a small flag to start a race, and Janet?
One's a Go Rag Knee-Flex and the other has No Gag Reflex.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:30, archived)
One's a Go Rag Knee-Flex and the other has No Gag Reflex.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:30, archived)
I think Baroness is hot
but this should not be a surprise to anyone.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
but this should not be a surprise to anyone.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
well, she IS a prostitute.
I'll treat you to a go on her if you like.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
I'll treat you to a go on her if you like.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
Until recently we were playing Draw Something together
Which practically makes us lovers
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
Which practically makes us lovers
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:35, archived)
what's the difference between someone letting smoke out of an indian chief and Sexface?
one deflates the smoke from Geronimo and the other fellates the bloke from Dominos
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:39, archived)
one deflates the smoke from Geronimo and the other fellates the bloke from Dominos
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:39, archived)
showing your age, giggles
what do you know about the new users, eh?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:41, archived)
what do you know about the new users, eh?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:41, archived)
what's the difference between a rubber DeLorean and baldmonkey?
one reaches 88 miles an hour then bounces, the other reaches 100,000 posts then flounces
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:45, archived)
one reaches 88 miles an hour then bounces, the other reaches 100,000 posts then flounces
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:45, archived)
What's the difference between a hamster dipped in treacle and gilgamesh?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:42, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:42, archived)
Really? You don't know? You should probably consider getting yourself committed again!
AHHAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:50, archived)
AHHAHAHAHAAHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHA!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:50, archived)
only you could be jealous of me getting sectioned
you fat fake mental, you can't even manage to be properly mental
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:51, archived)
you fat fake mental, you can't even manage to be properly mental
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:51, archived)
What's the difference between a small section of carpet that causes hills to grow in wetland and baldmonkey
One's a mat make fen tall and the other's a fat fake mental
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:54, archived)
One's a mat make fen tall and the other's a fat fake mental
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:54, archived)
what's the difference between images of daleks and tardii permanently etched into skin and a big baldy beardy bumhole?
one is called 'who tats' and the other...
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:47, archived)
one is called 'who tats' and the other...
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:47, archived)
Nice.
What's the difference between a skunk that swears so much it has to be censored and a lovely lovely person?
One's a bleepy stinky, the other is a sleepybinky
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:51, archived)
What's the difference between a skunk that swears so much it has to be censored and a lovely lovely person?
One's a bleepy stinky, the other is a sleepybinky
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:51, archived)
man, this was an open invitation for two hats to make a dramatic appearance
but he fucked it up
BOOOOOOOOOOO
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:02, archived)
but he fucked it up
BOOOOOOOOOOO
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:02, archived)
Yes I would.
But manolith pretends to like it when Jonti Veitch wanks in his eyes. And that's all that matters to the likes of "rob".
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:24, archived)
But manolith pretends to like it when Jonti Veitch wanks in his eyes. And that's all that matters to the likes of "rob".
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:24, archived)
he always sings a zany song at the point of release
makes it all worthwhile since everything that man ever recorded was a stone cold classic
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:36, archived)
makes it all worthwhile since everything that man ever recorded was a stone cold classic
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:36, archived)
oh well, keep it and play some light jazz on it.
it's what he would have wanted.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:13, archived)
it's what he would have wanted.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:13, archived)
Nice
I want to go to the museum where you have the shrunken heads. Have you been there?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:37, archived)
I want to go to the museum where you have the shrunken heads. Have you been there?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:37, archived)
Yes,
it also has a very tall Mouse. It is an ace museum. There are drawers and drawers and drawers of butterflys and moths and bugs and all sorts. I like to wander around it on my breaks.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:39, archived)
it also has a very tall Mouse. It is an ace museum. There are drawers and drawers and drawers of butterflys and moths and bugs and all sorts. I like to wander around it on my breaks.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:39, archived)
Thinking about going and taking a look
If I do I'll drop you a line and you can meet my horrible family.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:41, archived)
If I do I'll drop you a line and you can meet my horrible family.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:41, archived)
That would be an absolute delight,
you can meet my lovely ladypigfriend, she is much nicer than me, and will eventually leave me.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:42, archived)
you can meet my lovely ladypigfriend, she is much nicer than me, and will eventually leave me.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:42, archived)
do you know how they make those?
i know how they make those cos i saw it on QI or horrible histories or that
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:40, archived)
i know how they make those cos i saw it on QI or horrible histories or that
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:40, archived)
Indeed I do
But that's only because I read about it today. There were headhunters providing these things during the 1930's!! Crazy stuff.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:42, archived)
But that's only because I read about it today. There were headhunters providing these things during the 1930's!! Crazy stuff.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:42, archived)
i'd like to skin your head and stretch the skin around some pot pourri and leave it at the bottom of my bed
i'd kiss you every morning and make you watch when i was having my special time
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:44, archived)
i'd kiss you every morning and make you watch when i was having my special time
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:44, archived)
what's the difference between batman tripping over and baldmonkey
one's a bat fallbag and the other is a fat ballbag.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:56, archived)
one's a bat fallbag and the other is a fat ballbag.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:56, archived)
What's the difference between someone lacking good manners while using their OAP ticket on a bus and Grrrmachine?
One's uncouth with pass and the other's a poof with cars.
Or something.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:01, archived)
One's uncouth with pass and the other's a poof with cars.
Or something.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:01, archived)
What's the difference between the expression of a person who just won the "choking noise" competition and Quentin?
One's an Uck King face and the other is fucking ace.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:18, archived)
One's an Uck King face and the other is fucking ace.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:18, archived)
What's the difference between frightening everyone in a harbour building by determining the total number of bottles of German wine and wormulus?
One is a wharf scaring hock count and the other is a scarf wearing cock hound.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:22, archived)
One is a wharf scaring hock count and the other is a scarf wearing cock hound.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:22, archived)
How come all of these brilliant jokes I dun aren't on the popular page?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:26, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:26, archived)
birds made of lego
the avian kind, not the make-up and fannies kind
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:55, archived)
the avian kind, not the make-up and fannies kind
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:55, archived)
What's the difference between someone who thinks a lot about units of liquid measurement used by ancient Hebrews, and a qotw-er?
One likes to ponder hin, and the other one of its legs are both the same.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:30, archived)
One likes to ponder hin, and the other one of its legs are both the same.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 12:30, archived)
I'm so bored and tired I am struggling to keep my eyes open at my desk.
I mean this literally not figuratively. I keep trying to read stuff on my screen or from printouts and my eyes go wobbly and then close themselves for a few second.
They just did it then while I was typing. It was a right mess. What gives?
How would you combat it?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:30, archived)
I mean this literally not figuratively. I keep trying to read stuff on my screen or from printouts and my eyes go wobbly and then close themselves for a few second.
They just did it then while I was typing. It was a right mess. What gives?
How would you combat it?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:30, archived)
Go for a little walk out in the fresh air, and have a glass of water.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:35, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:35, archived)
Didn't work.
I work right by a major sewage works. There was no fresh air.
There are no cups or glasses left in the kitchen to put water into.
So no coffee either.
PANIC.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:43, archived)
I work right by a major sewage works. There was no fresh air.
There are no cups or glasses left in the kitchen to put water into.
So no coffee either.
PANIC.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:43, archived)
i think you should try Manoliths suggestion,
of giving up, rolling over and waiting to die.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:48, archived)
of giving up, rolling over and waiting to die.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:48, archived)
What's the difference between a glove that fell off and manolith?
One's a mitt shod and the other is a shit mod.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:44, archived)
One's a mitt shod and the other is a shit mod.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:44, archived)
What's the difference between a sound engineer who dropped one of Green Day's master tapes and had to put it back on the reel and manolith?
One's wound Dookie and the other is a downs wookie.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:50, archived)
One's wound Dookie and the other is a downs wookie.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:50, archived)
What's the difference between a festive duck and manolith?
One's a Christmas quacker, the other is a fucking prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:52, archived)
One's a Christmas quacker, the other is a fucking prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:52, archived)
Well, the highlights would be
£50 to spend at HMV - dunno what on yet
A Korg Monotron Duo
Assassins Creed Revelations
and cardboard box painted bright colours with elastic bands on.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:57, archived)
£50 to spend at HMV - dunno what on yet
A Korg Monotron Duo
Assassins Creed Revelations
and cardboard box painted bright colours with elastic bands on.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:57, archived)
It's pretty good actually.
I spent a good hour playing on it with some finger picks.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:08, archived)
I spent a good hour playing on it with some finger picks.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:08, archived)
do hmv do weird musical widgets?
is it a voucher you can use online or only in stores?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:02, archived)
is it a voucher you can use online or only in stores?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:02, archived)
Stores probably.
It'd be lovely if they stock the Korg Monotron Delay.
But it'll probably go on a PS3 game.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:07, archived)
It'd be lovely if they stock the Korg Monotron Delay.
But it'll probably go on a PS3 game.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:07, archived)
shame, there are better prices on the website
still a nice gift though. more than you deserve.
what games are you looking at?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:23, archived)
still a nice gift though. more than you deserve.
what games are you looking at?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:23, archived)
what sort of thing are you after?
do you want hours and hours of content? do you want something you can play with your kids? WHAT? TELL ME!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:35, archived)
do you want hours and hours of content? do you want something you can play with your kids? WHAT? TELL ME!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:35, archived)
What's the difference between a financier in a gun fight and manolith?
One's a warring banker and the other is a boring wanker.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:55, archived)
One's a warring banker and the other is a boring wanker.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:55, archived)
What's the difference between a special rod used to put decorative holes in leather and manolith?
One's a pinking stick and the other's a stinking prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:03, archived)
One's a pinking stick and the other's a stinking prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:03, archived)
sorry, for that to work, you'd need to use either prinking or strick
here you go:
dictionary.reference.com/browse/prink
dictionary.reference.com/browse/strick
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:06, archived)
here you go:
dictionary.reference.com/browse/prink
dictionary.reference.com/browse/strick
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:06, archived)
Don't stiffle my creativity, guy.
This is waking my brain up so it is.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:08, archived)
This is waking my brain up so it is.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:08, archived)
nah, i don't need to appeal to the ones here who think being nasty is funny
luckily the good people like me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:02, archived)
luckily the good people like me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:02, archived)
What's the difference between a special hat to wear while doing metal inert gas welding and manolith?
One's a M.I.G. beanie and the other is a big meanie.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:06, archived)
One's a M.I.G. beanie and the other is a big meanie.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:06, archived)
What's the difference between a mouth ulcer that is on some wrapping paper for some reason and manolith?
One is a wrap canker and the other is a crap wanker?
Doesn't really work for silent letters though, is it.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:17, archived)
One is a wrap canker and the other is a crap wanker?
Doesn't really work for silent letters though, is it.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:17, archived)
What's the difference between a panda that has skin so hard hypodermic needles cannot penetrate it and manolith?
One's an unprickable bear and the other's an unbearable prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:23, archived)
One's an unprickable bear and the other's an unbearable prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:23, archived)
i might stop now
and
i'll start a new thread that will generate dozens more of these
very different things!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:29, archived)
and
i'll start a new thread that will generate dozens more of these
very different things!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:29, archived)
oh god, now this post is going to cause some hideous rip in space and time
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:04, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:04, archived)
lol it's just a post manolith, you been watchin too much star wars
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:12, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:12, archived)
dance naked round the office, spraying all and sundry with a joyous stream of urine
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:27, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 11:27, archived)
Morning
I visited a house with a baby at the weekend, if it wasn't eating it was trying to eat it's hand.
Stupid fat shit.
you?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 7:48, archived)
I visited a house with a baby at the weekend, if it wasn't eating it was trying to eat it's hand.
Stupid fat shit.
you?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 7:48, archived)
Dun a little bonfire in the garden last night.
Had tea and lemon cake next to it.
so yeah
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:04, archived)
Had tea and lemon cake next to it.
so yeah
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:04, archived)
that stuff is far too complicated for having with a hangover.
I mean, what do you use a knife or a fork?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:16, archived)
I mean, what do you use a knife or a fork?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 10:16, archived)
I get bored of "What's the best cure for a hangover?"
Because it comes up all the time and reads as "TEE HEE! I GOT DRUNK LAST NIGHT! AREN'T I INTERESTING!".
I also get bored of "How do you poach an egg?" and "How do you pronounce scone?".
"What's you favourite cheese?" isn't much better.
And people who type "h" prounced "haitch". IT'S "AITCH" FUCK NUT.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:40, archived)
Because it comes up all the time and reads as "TEE HEE! I GOT DRUNK LAST NIGHT! AREN'T I INTERESTING!".
I also get bored of "How do you poach an egg?" and "How do you pronounce scone?".
"What's you favourite cheese?" isn't much better.
And people who type "h" prounced "haitch". IT'S "AITCH" FUCK NUT.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:40, archived)
best cure for a hangover
poached egg on a cheese scone with haitch from steps
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:06, archived)
poached egg on a cheese scone with haitch from steps
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:06, archived)
Alright Grrr,
Found this beast parked outside my house yesterday, thought it was right up your street.
www.flickr.com/photos/64196717@N06/7239894948/
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:23, archived)
Found this beast parked outside my house yesterday, thought it was right up your street.
www.flickr.com/photos/64196717@N06/7239894948/
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:23, archived)
If it helps,
The back window said "travelling Zumba instructor" and it had seemed to have won some sort peugot 206 award. It sounded like a heap if crap.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:52, archived)
The back window said "travelling Zumba instructor" and it had seemed to have won some sort peugot 206 award. It sounded like a heap if crap.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:52, archived)
I love a chavvy car
there's a lime green citroen c3 around here with full skirts, spoiler, blacked-out windows, the lot around here. I want it so bad.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:55, archived)
there's a lime green citroen c3 around here with full skirts, spoiler, blacked-out windows, the lot around here. I want it so bad.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:55, archived)
You could totally sew giant fabric triangles along the middle.
And marker pen pupils on to the head lamps.
DINO-CHAVCAR
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:05, archived)
And marker pen pupils on to the head lamps.
DINO-CHAVCAR
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:05, archived)
That's it; I'm never thinking about you sitting on my face when I masturbate again.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:09, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:09, archived)
Yeah, you make out like you don't like it, but EVERYTIME I imagine you sitting on my face while a masturbate, I imagine you having a great time.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:13, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:13, archived)
why, am I playing pokemon at the same time?
I like pokemon. Or watching TV?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:14, archived)
I like pokemon. Or watching TV?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:14, archived)
Sometimes you get out a Weepingbell vibrator and pop it in your botbot which makes your bum cheeks wibble on my chin a bit.
If that's what you mean.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:16, archived)
If that's what you mean.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:16, archived)
Friend had a bonfire down by the river on saturday night,
Sat talking and playing guitar till 6am. Felt like a right filthy hippy. Was a nice weekend though.
You should probably not breed, due to being a bit broken, you know what I mean?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:17, archived)
Sat talking and playing guitar till 6am. Felt like a right filthy hippy. Was a nice weekend though.
You should probably not breed, due to being a bit broken, you know what I mean?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:17, archived)
You're probably right.
The missus hassoriosis sorocis skin problems too so all in all not good.
I also have some other things wrong with me like sebacious cysts, they're harmful but annoying and both sides of my family have them.
Oh and the possible schizophenia that I sometime wonder if I have.
I'd probably spawn a mutant
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:20, archived)
The missus has
I also have some other things wrong with me like sebacious cysts, they're harmful but annoying and both sides of my family have them.
Oh and the possible schizophenia that I sometime wonder if I have.
I'd probably spawn a mutant
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:20, archived)
schizophenia? are you sure? better stab someone to make sure.
LOL!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:31, archived)
LOL!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:31, archived)
I hope Adam returns to us this week.
I miss him and still want to apologise to him.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:41, archived)
I miss him and still want to apologise to him.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:41, archived)
I'm off for a shit.
Tell him not to go anywhere if you see him.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:42, archived)
Tell him not to go anywhere if you see him.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:42, archived)
this weeks qotw seems to be bringing out the best
In that lot. Reet creepy.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:04, archived)
In that lot. Reet creepy.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:04, archived)
it's everything QOTW should be
lies, sex and massive drugz.
the only thing missing is accord justice.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:08, archived)
lies, sex and massive drugz.
the only thing missing is accord justice.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:08, archived)
They're pretty funny.
But yeah, they're not going to be doing anything really cool any time soon.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:57, archived)
But yeah, they're not going to be doing anything really cool any time soon.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 8:57, archived)
crying, eating, shitting itself.
why bother with the sleepless nights when you can log on here and get the same thing.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:05, archived)
why bother with the sleepless nights when you can log on here and get the same thing.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:05, archived)
you'll have one, one day
it'll be cheaper for you than most people as you won't need to buy any baby clothes... *obvious punchline*
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:08, archived)
it'll be cheaper for you than most people as you won't need to buy any baby clothes... *obvious punchline*
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:08, archived)
no I won't
I've made that very clear. Babies are for people who don't know what to do next in life.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:09, archived)
I've made that very clear. Babies are for people who don't know what to do next in life.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:09, archived)
i know you have
i just wanted to make a shit joke then gave up half way through
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:10, archived)
i just wanted to make a shit joke then gave up half way through
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:10, archived)
i didn't visit a house with a baby that when it wasn't eating was trying to eat its own hand, no
we had a barbecue and i got very angry about our hot water not working
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:05, archived)
we had a barbecue and i got very angry about our hot water not working
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:05, archived)
don't get angry manolith
get even
next time the water wants you to be hot, don't bother.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:07, archived)
get even
next time the water wants you to be hot, don't bother.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:07, archived)
our fucking landlord doesn't ever get professionals to fix things in our tumbledown shack
he does it himself. which would be fine but he's not very good at anything
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:09, archived)
he does it himself. which would be fine but he's not very good at anything
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:09, archived)
sorry mongy
we had a nice gas man in at the weekend to fit our new hob. He was telling us all about our boiler.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:24, archived)
we had a nice gas man in at the weekend to fit our new hob. He was telling us all about our boiler.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:24, archived)
i see, so instead of giving work to a forum chum, you pay a stranger, sadtimes, its no wonder i live in my car :(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:30, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:30, archived)
BONGO BONGO BONGO BONGO
I DUN A BLOG ABOUT BIRDS THAT I FARTED ON!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:15, archived)
I DUN A BLOG ABOUT BIRDS THAT I FARTED ON!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:15, archived)
Speaking of which, did you see the woodpeckers I got at the weekend?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:20, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:20, archived)
yeah I did.
instead of all this effort just go to a natural history museum, they have loads of stuffed birds in them.
couple of hours and you'd have tons of pictures.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:22, archived)
instead of all this effort just go to a natural history museum, they have loads of stuffed birds in them.
couple of hours and you'd have tons of pictures.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:22, archived)
Yeah. Now maybe people will appreciate the skill that goes into be an unbearable prick.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:26, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:26, archived)
Cheers, bro.
I always think of a cunt as a prick with character.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:30, archived)
I always think of a cunt as a prick with character.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:30, archived)
if you were a prick then you'd just be Adam
he's not coming back :'(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:32, archived)
he's not coming back :'(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:32, archived)
HOW AM I MEANT TO DELIVER THE HEARTFELT APOLOGY I SPENT ALL WEEKEND WRITING IF HE NEVER RETURNS?
:'-(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:35, archived)
:'-(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:35, archived)
you've cried wolf too many times, man
he'll never trust you again
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:36, archived)
he'll never trust you again
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:36, archived)
he gaz'd me last week and I reckon he cuts himself at night about this.
it was a well sad gaz too. poor mite.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:41, archived)
it was a well sad gaz too. poor mite.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:41, archived)
Aw man.
I was only joshing with him. I think he's super really.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:43, archived)
I was only joshing with him. I think he's super really.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:43, archived)
OT is the best place for him, as long as he doesn't act llike a prick
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:45, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:45, archived)
i know you put a lot of time and effort into it
you can't just start insulting people and expect to be taken seriously
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:35, archived)
you can't just start insulting people and expect to be taken seriously
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:35, archived)
I'm good at what I do. I pride myself on that.
It upsets me when haters be hating. Hopefully pricks like this will open their eyes to how lucky they are to have me and my skillz.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:37, archived)
It upsets me when haters be hating. Hopefully pricks like this will open their eyes to how lucky they are to have me and my skillz.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:37, archived)
whatcha tryina do to me, i said THINK
THINK-THINK
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:27, archived)
THINK-THINK
R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:27, archived)
OKAY!
*puts the russ abbot album on*
*hands out the party poppers*
LET'S DO THIS!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:19, archived)
*puts the russ abbot album on*
*hands out the party poppers*
LET'S DO THIS!!!!
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:19, archived)
COME ON EVERYONE! It's the northern ratafarian song! we all love that!
*moshes*
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:22, archived)
*moshes*
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:22, archived)
i got a batmobile yesterday and some ninja dude today
not bad for 30p
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:44, archived)
not bad for 30p
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:44, archived)
I got the bat thing and the bat thing from sat and sun
the smiths across the road don't have the minikits though wankers.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:47, archived)
the smiths across the road don't have the minikits though wankers.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:47, archived)
My son did get me some Marvel Lego for my birthday yesterday though.
It had wolverine, magneto and deadpool in.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:28, archived)
It had wolverine, magneto and deadpool in.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:28, archived)
I know, I posted on your facebook wall
like a true internet friend
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:50, archived)
like a true internet friend
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:50, archived)
Yeah.
But on Friday.
Then chocolate cake on Saturday and Lemon cake on my birthday.
Pretty good haul.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:42, archived)
But on Friday.
Then chocolate cake on Saturday and Lemon cake on my birthday.
Pretty good haul.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:42, archived)
Nah. Look. Everyone is getting confused.
My birthday was yesterday. Today is just a day.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:51, archived)
My birthday was yesterday. Today is just a day.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:51, archived)
i like a party with a happy atmosphere
all those other parties is shit
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:22, archived)
all those other parties is shit
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 9:22, archived)
hangover cure..
eat whatever paulypopS iS eating
cum in your mouth
or
raw egg with own piss afterwash?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:48, archived)
eat whatever paulypopS iS eating
cum in your mouth
or
raw egg with own piss afterwash?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:48, archived)
Ice cold Irn Bru.
Or ice cold chocolate milkshake.
'Ning The LOVELY Rigby.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:51, archived)
Or ice cold chocolate milkshake.
'Ning The LOVELY Rigby.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:51, archived)
pick from the list..
irn bru works for you?
and i'm not in anyway lovely..
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:53, archived)
irn bru works for you?
and i'm not in anyway lovely..
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:53, archived)
I'm not going to pick from that list because it smells of povvo.
*Ruffles hair*
Awwww you're such a cute little rigby when you pretend you're not LOVELY.
:D
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 1:21, archived)
*Ruffles hair*
Awwww you're such a cute little rigby when you pretend you're not LOVELY.
:D
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 1:21, archived)
Alright rigby
There is no such thing, only time will cure a hangover
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 2:47, archived)
There is no such thing, only time will cure a hangover
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 2:47, archived)
I don't know what to do. can't be arsed to go and make a cuppa,
but can't lie here for another 6 hours. FUCK IT.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:49, archived)
but can't lie here for another 6 hours. FUCK IT.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:49, archived)
ok i forgot.. sorry
lie in a faceward position and don't scream while i enter from the back
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:59, archived)
lie in a faceward position and don't scream while i enter from the back
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:59, archived)
*braces*
I am self-pity central. husband is in Southampton til Friday. cat is ignoring me. I have ANOTHER infection cooking in the scar from my latest surgery. i WILL NOT tidy my bedroom. nobody understands me. imma listen to MCR and make shallow cuts on my upper arms to demonstrate my angst*
* fuck that shit I am WAY too old for that nonsense. does anyone have a spare valium?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 1:05, archived)
I am self-pity central. husband is in Southampton til Friday. cat is ignoring me. I have ANOTHER infection cooking in the scar from my latest surgery. i WILL NOT tidy my bedroom. nobody understands me. imma listen to MCR and make shallow cuts on my upper arms to demonstrate my angst*
* fuck that shit I am WAY too old for that nonsense. does anyone have a spare valium?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 1:05, archived)
if you have mor e than 4k in cash ready to go
i will not enjoy our holiday in hot climes
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 1:21, archived)
i will not enjoy our holiday in hot climes
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 1:21, archived)
ooh. I might put a sugar in it.
living the motherfucking dream, right here :(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:55, archived)
living the motherfucking dream, right here :(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:55, archived)
i think WHO
are totally against world health.. they just propogagte the international bank and fuck people over
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:50, archived)
are totally against world health.. they just propogagte the international bank and fuck people over
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:50, archived)
I am, The LOVELIEST Sidekick EVER.
*Panders*
Ain't got much time to be on here tonight though. Busy shift.
:(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:50, archived)
*Panders*
Ain't got much time to be on here tonight though. Busy shift.
:(
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:50, archived)
HELLO LOVELY STUJ.
how the hell are you? how's them sexy penguins doing without the Penguin Master?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:53, archived)
how the hell are you? how's them sexy penguins doing without the Penguin Master?
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:53, archived)
I'm sure it is average, and it doesn't matter anyway
you only really notice the first couple of inches into sleep
( , Sun 20 May 2012, 23:52, archived)
you only really notice the first couple of inches into sleep
( , Sun 20 May 2012, 23:52, archived)
Robin Gibb has died...
The jokes have started already...
www.sickipedia.org/joke/view/1294174
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:04, archived)
The jokes have started already...
www.sickipedia.org/joke/view/1294174
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:04, archived)
I found out about it because staying alive was trending on Twitter
lol, etc
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:38, archived)
lol, etc
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:38, archived)
Russel Howards eyes appear to be too close together.
Also he is a poor comedian.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:11, archived)
Also he is a poor comedian.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:11, archived)
I like it when he does that funny voice because he's run out of things to say 5 seconds into his act
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:14, archived)
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:14, archived)
I'm watching his good news show.
It's just someone commentating badly on /links.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:15, archived)
It's just someone commentating badly on /links.
( , Mon 21 May 2012, 0:15, archived)
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