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morning

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 8:45, archived)
Morning

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 9:20, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:30, archived)
alright

(dozers You big spazzer!, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 9:26, archived)
fuck off dozers

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:31, archived)
good morning

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 9:38, archived)
and isn't it a looovely morning?

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:31, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 9:42, archived)
yo

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:31, archived)
6 Music keep telling me that Kendrick Lamar is brilliant.
Rarely have they been more wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 9:52, archived)
he has his moments
but largely, you are correct.
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:32, archived)
Radio 6 is shit and for cunts
Should have shut it down when they were going to, bloody whiny millenials with their social media campaigns
(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 12:52, archived)
horbs
*nods chin up*
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:45, archived)
Morning Horbs
Stonker up here like
(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 10:50, archived)

t k n
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 12:17, archived)

r?
(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 12:54, archived)
Eveninh

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 0:22, archived)
morninh SSG
whatcha doinh?
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 0:55, archived)
I'm going to start a thread, I've nothing to share with you, I don't think I have an online opinion on much, I'm just me, but I like a row, so go on let's have it

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:20, archived)
Bill and Ted or Wayne's World?

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:22, archived)
wayne's world obvs

(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:33, archived)
WRONG

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:35, archived)
them's fighting words

(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:39, archived)
It's genuinely criminal how Wayne's is held in such high regard compared to B&T

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:41, archived)
bill and ted is all very well if you're 10 years or under

(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:44, archived)
wut

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sat 2 Sep 2017, 1:02, archived)
What channel? Makes a big difference

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:44, archived)
Bogus Journey is better than Excellent Adventure.
There, I said it.
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:48, archived)
And WW2 is shit.
Makes you think.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:04, archived)
You can wee without doing a poo, but you can't do a poo without doing a wee.
Really makes you think.
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:05, archived)
lol poo

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:10, archived)
Lol

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:13, archived)
1048576, bottom get

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:25, archived)

bottom spawny
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:27, archived)
This is a spreadsheet joke, at 9.30 on a friday night, w/y/h

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:27, archived)
"joke"

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:28, archived)
sympathy reply

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:30, archived)
The only thing worse than no-one clapping is one person clapping, loudly and slowly

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:32, archived)
And then I got off the bus, ahh.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:35, archived)
Fp this

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 21:45, archived)
your mum

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:00, archived)
Alright horbs
Welcome back
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:01, archived)
Judge Judy
Is fucking ace innit?
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 18:23, archived)
dunno what that is soz

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 18:33, archived)
Ignorance of the law is no defence. That's five years in the Cubes, creep!

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 18:50, archived)
You're a fucking gay prick and everyone hates you, especially your tranny kid Noah.
Just sayin.
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 19:09, archived)
Hahahahahaha
You sad pathetic mong.
(I helped save b3ta! spanishfly is so fucking sexy people impersonate him, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 22:40, archived)
Lol

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 23:00, archived)
judge judy and executioner?

(I helped save b3ta! sock more tea vicar?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 20:15, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:02, archived)
Hey

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:03, archived)
hullo

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:07, archived)
no, he's still alive

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:09, archived)
I'm really bored.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:14, archived)
I ate a big lunch, and now I'm really sleepy.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:15, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:18, archived)
Clapping out of time to music should be punishable by death
Hello!
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:20, archived)
ait

(I helped save b3ta! mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:21, archived)
Yet again, it has managed to start lashing it down with rain just before I have to go home.
Second day in a row now. W00t!
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:24, archived)
Autumn is coming.
[Game Of Thrones on a shoestring budget]
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:32, archived)
They're going to swap those IKEA rugs for pound shop ones.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:37, archived)
Haven't seen any GoT since series 4 (I think).
Bit worried that I'll be sent into an impotent rage over how much it's diverged from the books, and how they've got [important scene / character] wrong.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:47, archived)
Ha, I didn't make it past the first half of season 1.
Then again I'm not a massive fantasy fan, despite liking LOTR. If George R. R. Martin could write a historical drama, with all the intrigue but none of the constant over-the-top murdering and raping and dragons, I'd watch the shit out of that.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:53, archived)
Good morning

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:29, archived)
alright mgt.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:31, archived)
o/

(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 16:15, archived)
Has dozers fucked off yet?
alt: fuck off dozers.
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:14, archived)
I fucking hope so
alt: alright mr h, you still in brum?
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:16, archived)
no, tangers. I have moved to The North.
Flat cap and whippets for me now.
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:17, archived)
ONE OF US, ONE OF US

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:36, archived)
SUCK UPON MINE PENUS, FOR IT IS THE PENUS OF THE LORD

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:17, archived)
alright Two Hats
How's the lawn?
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:18, archived)
Not bad
The rain has helped
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:19, archived)
Ger, think I might go out for a wander

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:20, archived)
alright mongy
It's a nice afternoon for the juicer.
(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:21, archived)
Yeah will have a couple , got my kids tonight tho

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:26, archived)
Dunno, dun'care.
He could contribute 70% of the content of this board and I still wouldn't see it.

I cannot wait to sod off home today. I'm applying for a new job over the weekend but it'll take 5-9 months to know whether I've got it.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:23, archived)
Are you a caterpillar
And have you applied to be a butterfly?
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:21, archived)
got what, a baby?

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:56, archived)
This site is more tolerable if you put everyone on ignore.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:23, archived)
it did wonders for fucksocks's's mental state

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:30, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:49, archived)
alright

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:25, archived)
I'm really busy and it's really annoying.
Friday shit wank.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:29, archived)
^

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:36, archived)

busy and it's really annoying.
iday shit w
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:38, archived)
That is not true.
Colin just told me "some nig nog has drowned in the river, probably trying to steal a boat"
I don't even know where to start sometimes.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:41, archived)
oh my goodness
Well, I love you.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:42, archived)
Might not do any more work today. What do you reckon?

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:46, archived)
Nearly 2:00 on a friday afternoon?
Yeah, no point starting anything important. Can you make yourself look busy?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:56, archived)
I'm just gonna go and sweep the workshop.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:19, archived)
That'll fuck the fishing up for a bit

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:45, archived)
Will it?
They had police divers and firemen trawling the water and so on. Will it scare the fish off a bit?
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:45, archived)
Yeah that swim will be fucked , although you could ask the old bill to find some nice gravel patches and bait them

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:47, archived)
I'm not speaking to plod.

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:18, archived)
Colin is a cunt

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:09, archived)
Oh, yeah

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:23, archived)
Yello are cunts too

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:08, archived)
I've never met a Colin who wasn't a cunt

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:48, archived)
Come to think of it, the Colin at our work was a bit racist as well.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:50, archived)
My aunt used to go out with a guy called Colin.
He was alright.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:55, archived)
I heard he used to pressure her in to sex when she didn't really want to after he'd had a couple of shandy bass

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:58, archived)
I heard he used to tell her that her arse looked fat while really it was just pleasingly plump

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:04, archived)
i dated a Colin once
he had a second set of teeth behind the first set. put me right off.
also, he was a tight-fisted cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:01, archived)
Was he a shark?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:11, archived)
pretty sure he wasn't
the whole lack of gills thing was a bit of a giveaway
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 15:13, archived)
I'm in Morley.
It is well shit.
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:05, archived)
if he hasn't, do you want me to shank him?
need to get rid of a bit of aggression
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:08, archived)
I ent scared of u

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:09, archived)
i just got done over by the social
imma kill someone by the end of the day
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:13, archived)
Lol poor

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:14, archived)
poorer than i thought
they stung me for £834 they say they've overpaid me. that works out at around £139 a month they want to take off me, not counting the money they want repaying. that with the £75 tax hike because carer's allowance is taxable means i'm going to be worae off than before, with the added bonus of having to deal with a mental.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:17, archived)
That's a bit rubbish.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:29, archived)
Just tell them you spent it.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:34, archived)

you spent it it was just resting in your account
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:39, archived)
Then raffle off a Rover Vitesse to reclaim the funds.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:55, archived)
careful now

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:55, archived)
Horbs xx
Where have you been, you miserable cunt?
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 14:20, archived)
Guys?
This is a 'no negative vibes' thread, yeah?
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:12, archived)
peace
off

lol
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:19, archived)
lol

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:21, archived)
I know

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:22, archived)
There is no remedy for love but to love more.

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:21, archived)
you can't hug a child with nuclear arms, m8

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:21, archived)
I didn't spread my horseradish evenly, it seems
and I just hit a big blob of it. Nelly.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:22, archived)
well you've really fucked it up now
just smash it into your anus
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:25, archived)
don't tell me what I already know, m8
I know how to eat horseradish. Jesus.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:26, archived)
I really hate to see Richard and Gary fighting :'(

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:21, archived)
it makes me soft downstairs

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:24, archived)
+ like Alan Bates and Oliver Reed in 'Women in Love'

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:25, archived)
Reed had a wank just before they filmed that scene so that his wanger would look bigger.

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:26, archived)
That doesn't sound right but I don't know enough about Reed's wanger to dispute it.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:34, archived)
So you're a cock expert eh?

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:35, archived)
I said I didn't know enough to dispute it.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:36, archived)
^ cock expert

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:37, archived)
I had to read Women in Love when I studied Modernism.
Fucking hell, Lawrence was a tedious windbag of an author. Like Grry but pre-internet.
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:44, archived)
Cheers, yeah?

(I helped save b3ta! Cheers Cheers, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:24, archived)
Alright Cheers

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:27, archived)
cheers indeed

(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:39, archived)
You are a knob
But I'm not 100% sure you have a knob
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:25, archived)
Not that not having a knob is a bad thing
Some of my best mates don't have knobs
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:26, archived)
U don't have ne m8s lol

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:28, archived)
The loneliness of being a serial killer

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:37, archived)
Chill with the negative vibes, man

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:38, archived)
No m8 u r teh knob

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:27, archived)
PLOT TWIST!

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:33, archived)
Lets fuck

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:28, archived)
I'll observe and make notes

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:29, archived)
I'll make sandwiches

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:30, archived)

notes high-pitched shrieks
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:31, archived)
*chuckle*

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:31, archived)
please don't upset me online

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:32, archived)
Alright psychochomp, nice to have you back

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:38, archived)
archived

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:39, archived)
Harassment.

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:40, archived)
STOP DOZERS STOP

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:41, archived)
See you in court m8

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:43, archived)
Hiya

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:30, archived)
To the rhythm of the honky tuck, stick a red nose on your cuck

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:52, archived)
Done, now what?

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:54, archived)
Snapchat

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:58, archived)
my pulse is a general 50-55 bpm
so I'm a laid-back, mellow, zen-type of fellow
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:42, archived)
fuck off dozers

(I helped save b3ta! mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:52, archived)
kill yourself

(I helped save b3ta! 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:55, archived)
Then I shall be fucked off in a positive way

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 12:57, archived)
fuck off dozers
dozers fuck off
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:14, archived)
to the tune of hang on sloopy

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 13:15, archived)
morning

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 7:28, archived)
Hello m8

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 7:35, archived)
I'm barely alive right now

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 7:39, archived)
I'm feeling good.
Except the bike seems to have lost some air in the rear tire so riding in was a bit wobbly.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 1 Sep 2017, 7:44, archived)
'member 'The Presidents of the United States of America'?
They were fucking abysmal.
(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 7:40, archived)
that is so uncres

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:29, archived)
^lingered last in line for brains

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:49, archived)
I will survive in my Mach 5! YEAH YEAH YEAH!
That was an alright song.
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:43, archived)
Sunshine plays a major part in the daytime, peace to mankind, Grry carry a black 9, nilla

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 7:54, archived)
this sounds like the sort of shit rappers come up with to try and sound hard

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:30, archived)
happy Veteran's Day

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:03, archived)
Alright dribble

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:04, archived)
$$

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:17, archived)
curing our cats and dogs since beasts were domesticated

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:30, archived)
morning
I just tried to reverse the car into the drive while the other car was still in it, hmmmnnngggghhhh
(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:09, archived)
did they touch?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:30, archived)
mongy

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:16, archived)
not funny any more m8

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:30, archived)
Hello, you lovely, lovely people.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:21, archived)
fuck off michael stipe

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:31, archived)
Morning.
There was a bloke at the bus stop this morning wearing a full-length bright orange leather trenchcoat. It was like The Matrix, sponsored by Fanta.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:24, archived)
maybe he bleached it and it went that colour just like so many people's haircuts in the 90s

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:31, archived)
that was me m8

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:55, archived)
hello forum chums

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:50, archived)
hello you

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:51, archived)
I'm not keen on this 'keep clicking the image until all of them have gone' thing

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:03, archived)
you should try being more trustworthy then

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:06, archived)
this constant testing is causing me to wonder if I am really a robot after all

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:14, archived)

tangles, yesterday
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:35, archived)
Ian.

(dozers You big spazzer!, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:53, archived)
Tom.

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:04, archived)
yeah buoy

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:57, archived)

youtu.be/jfGPQIDxA1A
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:06, archived)
It's amazing he's still alive

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:08, archived)
i have a headache

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 8:51, archived)
are you sick, or have you over-indulged?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:09, archived)
the former

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:13, archived)

i.imgur.com/w4wUNTI.png
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:29, archived)
not the most glamorous way to go but i'll take it

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:41, archived)
Morning
Run out of caster sugar so my coffee has palm sugar in it.
(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:04, archived)
I'm imagining two office chairs having sex doggy style
so the wheel base of one is tilted up and the wheels are spinning and the receiver is moaning "oh yeah, gimme some of that castor sugar".
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:08, archived)
are you?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:11, archived)
well, I was
but it was only a fleeting image that took far longer to describe than to actually imagine.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:18, archived)
I think it might do you some good to occasionally get outside and talk to real people not in your family face to face

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:12, archived)
^^^

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:14, archived)
why?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:17, archived)
why?

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:14, archived)
because it's easier to imagine than two trolleys having sex
because they just slide into each other with no foreplay
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:15, archived)
Reading this makes me feel normal

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:20, archived)
hello

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:11, archived)
m'laddy

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:12, archived)
how's them new gnashers?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:15, archived)
very good, thank you
Speaking and eating is now causing fewer issues than before.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:18, archived)
do you still have that cute lisp?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:21, archived)
I have to put it on

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:51, archived)
FFS.
It will never cease to amaze me how one phone call can fuck up your morning. Apparently some people can fuck things up on a daily basis and it doesn't matter, but if you put one single foot wrong then it's the end of the world.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:12, archived)
what have you fucked up now, spazzy?

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:14, archived)
Underquoted a client by €70,
which is really going to impact the lives of my two bosses, one of whom's just come back from a fortnight's holiday in Germany and the other of whom has just gone on holiday to Canada for three weeks.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:17, archived)
don't know how that could have happened
b3ta.com/talk/8111132
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:26, archived)
lol
It's a mystery to me, m8.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:28, archived)
the trouble with being good at your job
is that the moment you're not, all hell breaks loose because the house of cards that everyone else's roles are built upon all comes crashing down.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:16, archived)
This is part of the problem.
I'm excellent at my job; it's when I have to start doing other people's jobs (in which I have virtually no experience) that things feck up.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:19, archived)
what a load of shit

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:34, archived)
he should stick to the office chair slash fiction, really

(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:37, archived)
not sure how slashfic would work
I suppose they'd just tape knives to their handles and spin round and round like a whirlwind of slicey death.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:43, archived)

he'
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:47, archived)
the artist clearly needs to get outside and interact with real people

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:53, archived)
I guess you'll never know

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:44, archived)
Morning
The new LCD Soundsystem album doesn't disappoint. Hurrah.
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:46, archived)
Friday, yeah?

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:49, archived)
*checks notes*
It seems so.
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:50, archived)
I ordered a full wiring kit for one of my guitars
and the .22uf capacitor is missing. I have never been so furious, and disappointed. And aroused.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 9:58, archived)
is there still a maplins on Fratton Road? They'd have one

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 10:06, archived)
No
and the one on Kingston Road's gone too. There are other places, but I'm not sure I have the time.
Also, I might already have one in a box somewhere. BUT IT'S THE PRINCIPAL.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 10:27, archived)
Listen to this, it's too good to miss
Da-da, da-da, da da *farts*
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 21:31, archived)
hi whigfield

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 21:44, archived)
Lol

(dozers You big spazzer!, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 22:30, archived)
I'm serious as cancer when I say dinner is a dansak.

(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 22:37, archived)
alright 'Lata Mangeshkar'

(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 1 Sep 2017, 1:03, archived)
A bit more choke and she would've started

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 22:57, archived)
:D
"Someone's been tinkering with Herbie"
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 23:28, archived)
mongy

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:08, archived)
mongy

(dozers You big spazzer!, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:13, archived)
*nod*

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:27, archived)
my phone's finally done a monster munch
leaving it here as tribute
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:14, archived)
Mongy

(I helped save b3ta! Smash Monkey 2 The damp spastic, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:19, archived)
cheers

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:27, archived)
mongy all

(I helped save b3ta! H.B.Mupps, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:25, archived)
I am the alpha and the omongy

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:28, archived)
my name is ozymongdius, king of kings
look upon my works, ye mighty and... dunno
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 11:15, archived)
Guyrim

(dozers You big spazzer!, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:46, archived)
Alright

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:54, archived)
yer you?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:58, archived)
guybrush

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:57, archived)
threepwood

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 7:59, archived)
Artood

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:31, archived)
in the middle of arstrood

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:34, archived)
mongy

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:07, archived)
sweet as

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:10, archived)
Hey hey, we're the mongys.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:10, archived)
accusations of mongying around are entirely without merit

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:11, archived)
I'm afraid I'm too busy monging
to put anybody down
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:13, archived)
Can’t believe it’s been 20 years since that slag was smashed into the tunnel it still freaks my nut out to this day.

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:13, archived)
Proof that getting pregnant with a Muslim's baby really pisses off the lizard people, eh?

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:18, archived)
If only James Bond had stepped in
we'd have Di another day
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:19, archived)
Ah, thanks
You've reminded me that it's my mates birthday
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:03, archived)
*shakes head*
my birthday is in october, man. come on
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:09, archived)
Munging

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:31, archived)
disgusting

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:36, archived)
good mongy grrrmachine
good mongy everyone
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 8:52, archived)
I think this mongy is off to a good start

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:04, archived)
HEEEEEEEEEEEEEY YOOOOUUUUUUU GUUUUUUUUYYYYYYYSSSSSSSSSS

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:00, archived)
I imagined you more like his mum tbh

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:05, archived)
*throws from the train*

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:17, archived)
Cracking bit of filly

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:19, archived)
I'm on my way to London
I hear the streets are paved with gold
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:18, archived)
and spunk

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:20, archived)
If you mean discarded Ferrero Rocher wrappers, then sure.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:20, archived)
Hey

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:51, archived)
mongy

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:54, archived)
you're like the beetlejuice of b3ta now

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 9:57, archived)
b3taljuice

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:05, archived)
I said mongychops, mongychops, mongychops
but nothing happened.
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:07, archived)
I can't really remember the plot to Candyman, but probably that.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:08, archived)
That was pretty good, if memory serves.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:11, archived)
Yes
It had all the ingredients of a terrible film, but for some reason it worked. And they can put that on the poster, if they like.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:28, archived)
Everything's better with Tony Todd.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:32, archived)
good mongy
aha ha, great Thursday!
(I helped save b3ta! Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:03, archived)
it's off to a cracking start

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:11, archived)
I doubt anyone will top this thread today

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:27, archived)
+ themselves over

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 10:30, archived)
shows what you know!
*suicides*
(I helped save b3ta! manolith hooray for me, Thu 31 Aug 2017, 11:10, archived)
Blimey, today's dragging on more than Conchita Wurst.
What's a good thing to do with a bag of potatoes, since I bought a bag when I already had a bag?
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:59, archived)
make clocks
www.wikihow.com/Make-a-Potato-Clock
(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:02, archived)
Alright, GladOS.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:05, archived)
shove them up your chuffer

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:04, archived)
Maris (Shit)piper

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:05, archived)
hash browns

(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:29, archived)
eat them, you fucking prick
what else are you supposed to do with spuds? Use them as the foundation of a short-lived currency?
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:04, archived)
$pudcoin

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:05, archived)
cut them in half, carve rude images on them
and go on a bansky-inspired stencil rampage around your neighbourhood
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:05, archived)
Cor, I haven't made potato stencils since primary school.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:06, archived)
stick googly eyes and lips onto them and pretend you have some friends round your gaffe for the first time in your entire life

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:05, archived)
I've actually got some googly eyes knocking around at home; we can make this happen.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:08, archived)
Make cocks
https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=potato+cocks
(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:06, archived)
Some of those are surprisingly realistic.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:07, archived)
carve them into racehorses and pretend they're like that potoooooooooo joke that's on reddit every fucking week

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:06, archived)
too much effort m8

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:10, archived)
taunt Irish people with them

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:07, archived)
Just make a fucking load of really dry roast potatoes and see if the homeless want them.
See if they're really struggling and hungry enough to eat shit roasties. Anyone that turns you down is obviously a scrounging bogger and wants a slap.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:07, archived)
Maybe I should bake them hard enough that they can be used to stone people to death.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:08, archived)
string them up on shoelaces for a pre-conkers warmup match

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:07, archived)
shove them up the exhaust pipes of your hated neighbours' cars

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:08, archived)
Tip them out and wank in the bag

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:09, archived)
It's a string bag; I wouldn't put much stock in its fluid absorption capabilities.
Although I could pretend it was a pair of yellow fishnet tights, I suppose.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:10, archived)
Take your top off and wear the bag instead
and introduce your Gallic chums to the charms of Rab C Nesbitt
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:19, archived)
As long as I don't have to go the method acting route and knock all my teeth out.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:20, archived)
peel them all, wear their skins, take a selfie
then use the photo to set up a facebook account called King Ed Gein
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:10, archived)
carve them with a curly fry cutter machine
then glue the two ends together, cook them and sell them to hipster twats as Möbius fries for fifteen pounds each.
(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:12, archived)
You're brimming with ideas today.
Get on Kickstarter while the going's good.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:17, archived)
settle down with one of them and make it an honest potato

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:13, archived)
lost my shit writing this one, tbh

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:13, archived)
This is a Bash St reference

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:26, archived)
It'll be a beautiful marisage

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:28, archived)
I have teeth!
I finally have teeth
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:29, archived)
Did you not previously have teeth?

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:31, archived)
Well, only two missing
Sorry, I deliberately misled you
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:35, archived)
Are you going to go around biting people now?

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:43, archived)
As far as I'm concerned, I don't think I have any other choice

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:49, archived)
It's the only socially acceptable way to get your money's worth.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:57, archived)
new dentures grandad?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:31, archived)
Yeah!
Finally got the replacement bridge that I've wanted for the last few years. This has made me very happy indeed.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:35, archived)
That chicken dentistry finally paid off, huh?

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:39, archived)
ba-gock

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:41, archived)
String them together with some twine
And then use them as organic arse-beads.
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:33, archived)
It's a good job they're new potatoes.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:34, archived)
They'll just be like beans rattling in a tin to some round here

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:37, archived)
Welly, Northumberland Street, etc.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:41, archived)
Bodger and badger tribute act

(Roger McGough-Pipe, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:13, archived)
Hmm, might have bangers and mash for tea
although it'll more likely be bangers and chips.
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:19, archived)
Mash for tea,
bubble for breakfast.
(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:34, archived)
have a really short game of cricket

(I helped save b3ta! Major Turd for tonight only, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 15:30, archived)
This is definitely true
www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFPBijvBJFk

What ELSE is definitely true?
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 11:52, archived)
That you, and me, we were always meant to be!!

(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Aug 2017, 11:55, archived)
Pig, you know it's true
Ooh ooh ooh, I love you
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:06, archived)
that you are a gay spaz who likes it up the bum from other gay spazzes

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 11:59, archived)
inconvenient truth

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:06, archived)
finger nails grow four times faster than toenails, fact

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 11:59, archived)
Woah now. What?
Have we got a source for this?
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:01, archived)
yes

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:04, archived)
Ok good.
I bet this comes up in a pub quiz soon.
(I helped save b3ta! Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:04, archived)
I wonder why that is

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:05, archived)
the general idea is that nail growth is affected by use, so the more the nail gets worn down it compensates by making the nail grow faster, some say it is because the hands are closer to the heart, but those cunts are fucking bent

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:07, archived)
no question

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats I saw someone eating M&M's with a spoon, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:12, archived)
It's because hands are closer to the heart.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:17, archived)
Asian womens vaginas go from east to west

(I helped save b3ta! broadsword w⚓, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:13, archived)
which side is the clitoris on?

(I helped save b3ta! Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:17, archived)
It's in the middle, like on the Japanese flag.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:24, archived)
the what?

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:30, archived)
the American Jewry

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:59, archived)
Sounds like a statement off QI.
It's definitely going to be the braderie this weekend, i.e. time to stock up on old games consoles, vintage furniture and whatever this year's emblematic item is (one year, wooden giraffe sculptures were all the rage).
(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:16, archived)
not sure

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:30, archived)
That every man if they don't go bald upstairs, they go bald downstairs

(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:41, archived)
I've gone bald on the mezzanine.

(I helped save b3ta! monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:49, archived)
That Richard McBeef is a whiffy bumskull.

(dozers You big spazzer!, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 12:54, archived)
being a young conservative is cool
#activateuk
(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:02, archived)
it's also a gateway to untapped conservative muff

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:07, archived)
ann widdecombe?

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:13, archived)
now we're talking

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:17, archived)
louise mensch y/n

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:19, archived)
N, she looks like Prince William in drag.

(I helped save b3ta! .Yeti. El amor en los tiempos del cólera, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:26, archived)
phwoar

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:30, archived)
N, she has re-invented herself on Twitter as some type of anti-Trump crusader
Although she is not smart enough to actually do proper background checks on the material she is pushing.
(I helped save b3ta! keybo was imtypingonakeyboard, now I'm not, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:30, archived)
non

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:54, archived)
Hahaha, fp this now

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:08, archived)
the b3ta blog will bring down theresa may

(I helped save b3ta! tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:12, archived)
it's already destroyed donald trump, i can't see him getting re-elected, till 2020

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:17, archived)
all hail HappyToast

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:17, archived)
I'm surprised that no-one has thought of combining Trump with Star Wars yet, imagine how funny that would be

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:22, archived)
ah man!

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:24, archived)
if anyone can ruin something, he can

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:25, archived)
YOU'RE NOT OBEYING THE RULES!
RULES!!! RULES!!! WE MUST HAVE RULES!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:54, archived)
your my friend so i will front page this, even tho it is fucking shit

(I helped save b3ta! mongychops, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:56, archived)
thanks magic donkey

(I helped save b3ta! $$ ✅, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 14:04, archived)
This much

(I helped save b3ta! drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Wed 30 Aug 2017, 13:12, archived)

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