b3ta.com board
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Messageboard » XXX » Message 10703479 (Thread)

# Allo, all. What should I draw the'day?

(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:25, archived)
# Genie: I want to sexy earthworms.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:27, archived)
# you want to sexy earthworms?
good for you!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:29, archived)
# Genie: Yeah. I hope it.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:37, archived)
#
y
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:47, archived)
# Do you just sit there lurking until he posts or what?
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:30, archived)
# well, someone has to do it i guess
cenaris became sloppy
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:34, archived)
# Ha, true enough.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
# sloppy cenaris?
Is that like a sloppy sloppy giuseppe, I see those on sale in sainsburys
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:52, archived)
# So we've got some sort of mole drill sergeant with a massive rack and a worm fetish.
Okay.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:31, archived)
# Genie: I have green pineapple.
B-)
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:43, archived)
# Yes, the tattoo of a hand grenade. ;D
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:49, archived)
# I think you may have a secret admirer bourbon.
Is the girl a fox moggy?
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:52, archived)
# Bah
She's a mole.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:54, archived)
# *phew*
I thought I'd be waking up with a dead fox's head on my pillow or something.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:00, archived)
# Tit for tat.
:P
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:31, archived)
[challenge entry] every bloody time
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:32, archived)
#
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:04, archived)
# I like this.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:34, archived)
# Great ending! \o/
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:01, archived)
# Cuts, cuts and yet more cuts
When will this moggy end?
(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 3:36, archived)
# Oh fuck me nobody cares, JJ doesnt care, go away and come back with something funny
you're obviously a talented guy, so do some funnies.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:34, archived)
# The hat could be a character on its own ...
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:34, archived)
# hello Dave
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:36, archived)
# Sexy hermaphrodites
isn't that an oxymoron?
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:38, archived)
# only if you can't find a good hole
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:58, archived)
# You might want to stop thinking about worms and get clothes that fit properly.
Also, while we're at it, can you grant me three wishes?

1: Pay off any present and future student loans.
2: A lifetime supply of mint chocolate ice cream.
3: MORE WISHES.
4: Fuck off.

kthxbai
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:38, archived)
# are you taking requests?
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:42, archived)
# If I got times.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:46, archived)
# genie being ass-raped by a dinosaur
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:48, archived)
# Ohh nice idea. :D
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:15, archived)
# yeah, i knew you'd like that
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:38, archived)
# Innit, bruv.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:48, archived)
# Do a 3 panel cartoon strip
the rule is it must be funny in Japanese and English.

If you can do this, I'll give you Jolly Jacks' home telephone number.
(edit: I do have a Japanese friend who will be able to confirm it's funny in Japanese).
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:49, archived)
# Ok, I got
But Even If I got it, Can I what to do? ^^;
Idea is good.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:18, archived)
# You are not Jolly Jack, who invites requests and recieves them and abuse in equal measure.
You think of something funny and you make it. That is the b3ta way. Otherwise you must flounce in dishonour.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:31, archived)
# a power flounce is also the way of b3ta
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:47, archived)
# Internet funnyman Rob Manuel, dressed as a woman
Plying his trade on the dirty streets of Camden in order to finance his crack addiction
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:51, archived)
# bindun
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:27, archived)
# Godzilla crushing the Yasukuni shrine
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:52, archived)
# You, fucking off.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:02, archived)
# ^ or that
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:04, archived)
# Where's the silly self portrait
You said you would do?
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:49, archived)
# O.O
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:11, archived)
# Think first...then type.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:42, archived)
# woah hold on, that might be going too far
I don't want to do thinkmaking before I type, the very idea is scary
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:48, archived)
# I know...I should follow my own advice. Ha ha ha!...<o>
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:13, archived)
# hehe
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:33, archived)
# a tyrannosaurus rex playing strip poker
with a mammoth
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:28, archived)
# I had a dream that I met a real mammoth a few nights back
it was awesome
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:30, archived)
# I'm currently writing and illustrating a children's book for a uni project.
The main character is a banjo playing mammoth named Dave.

Uhh... yeah, children's books are not my expertise.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:32, archived)
# Bin dun.
:P
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:33, archived)
# NOOOOO!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:42, archived)
# did you brush its fur?
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:32, archived)
# I read that as 'met a metal mammoth'.
Awesome just got awesomer.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:32, archived)
# \m/.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:34, archived)
# METAL MAMMOTH
20 tracks of glacial cool speed metal!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
# met a metal mammoth smoking meth
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
# The mullet a metal mammoth could manage
would be mental
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:41, archived)
# Vincent Tabak buying crisps, beer and rock salt for a cosy Christmas night in.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:30, archived)
# The prince of Wales stalking the highlands
whilst wearing an ass-hat. Up ahead Camilla is rooting in the heather for wild haggis. In the style of Gainsborough, if you please.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:33, archived)
# A maid with Rapunzel like hair cleaning a kitchen...
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
# ...using her hair as a mop
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
#
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:51, archived)
# That is fucking beautiful
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:53, archived)
# Fucking hell, that's good o_O *clicks*
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:53, archived)
# *throws down pencil*
*takes up poetry*
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:55, archived)
# Your stuff is far too good for
the likes of us.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:00, archived)
# pfft!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:08, archived)
# Fantastic amazing detail :)
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:02, archived)
# Good enuf!!!!!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:11, archived)
# *sound of jaw hitting floor*
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:20, archived)
# Shitting HELL.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 15:44, archived)
# Wow.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:15, archived)
# holy several lightyears of pigeon fucking!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 16:53, archived)
# Wowza!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 17:24, archived)
# Great Giana Sisters!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 18:58, archived)
# Hoe-lee shit
I think you just levelled up.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 20:35, archived)
# Ha ha...there is now a Level 0.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 21:08, archived)
# woah!! that's just.. just... downloaded \o/
Kevin O'Neill for starters
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 21:49, archived)
# A burglar stealing a horse in a wheelbarrow
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
# I love the smell of a threadwaste in the afternoon
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:35, archived)
#

(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:40, archived)
# LittleMaria: what's doing now Jack? :D
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:49, archived)
# Lemmy Kilmister of Motorhead doing some light gardening.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:37, archived)
# Bulky Waste Collection
with tits
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:37, archived)
# Two lady weasels in full plate mail riding salamanders and jousting with strap-ons
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:39, archived)
# YOU LOOKED IN MY BOOK DIDN'T Y-
I mean uhh... n-nice idea. Heh heh...
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:40, archived)
# We must subscribe to the same periodicals
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:14, archived)
# Yes, Medieval Mammal Mammary Madness.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:20, archived)
# That's the one!
Week by week you collect the parts to build your very own furry knocker hurling mangonel
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:40, archived)
# I missed out an issue or two, the whole thing fell apart when I put it together :/
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:47, archived)
# the queen mother laying a faberge egg.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:40, archived)
#

(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:44, archived)
# ...and the rest is history
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:47, archived)
# I like this.
I cannot think of a Spider and Scorpion strip that I did not love.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:54, archived)
# There are few situations that cannot be improved...
...by judicious application of the phrase "And I am naught but tongue."
(, Wed 29 Feb 2012, 17:37, archived)
# This is wonderful :D
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:03, archived)
# haha o,O
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:04, archived)
# A perfect circle.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:43, archived)
# Sir Jimmy Saville suddenly awakes, tied securely to a workbench in a room deep underground.
He glances around fearfully, only able to move his head, his eyes taking in the vats of bubbling green liquid and other chemicals of reanimation. With horror he realises that he is naked, stripped of both tracksuit and bling.

From behind a curtain at the end of the room steps Lisa Riley, also nude, with a wicked glint in her eye. Strapped around her pelvis is a huge, cigar-shaped phallus, the tiny Post-it® note stuck to the tip reads 'Welcome back. Now get your laughing gear around this, chum'
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:45, archived)
# This could be a late night sitcom.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:48, archived)
# Starring David Schwimmer.
Of course, we'd have to kill him first
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:55, archived)
# Lisa Riley has to play herself though
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:59, archived)
# This has promise
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:48, archived)
# Saville attempts to scream like a girl, but his cries are stifled by the mouthful of sap-bleeding pine.
Tears begin to prick his eyes, as his cheeks are pummelled from within and jagged splinters force their way into his gums. He gags as the rough wooden member slides back and forth over his tongue, yet his stomach seems to have been pumped, leaving him with nothing to bring up. Then through his water-blurred eyes, he becomes aware of someone watching silently from the shadows ...
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:02, archived)
# Ooh, a cliffhanger!
*waits with bated breath*
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:10, archived)
# Suddenly the wooden member is torn from his mouth, dislodging a selection of dentures which scatter like confetti over the tiled floor.
Shouting with pain, Sir James opens his eyes just in time to see Lisa Riley's gargantuan bulk tipping backwards away from him, arms flailing for purchase before her body impacts the ground head first, her pendulous breasts falling one under each arm and bouncing thrice before settling. Her eyes close and she begins to snore, with a sound like someone pulling knotted cord through the nostril of a cardboard warthog. Turning his head to one side, his eyes roam her inert body, lingering on the sexy regions before finally spotting the lasso buried in the folds of her neck. 'Thank you, oh thank you', moans Serj Aimes, as the cattle-wrangling stranger steps forward into the light.
If you think the stranger was Dave Lee Travis, turn to 43.
If you think the stranger was Ewan McGregor, turn to 75.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:25, archived)
# simply wonderful
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:35, archived)
# :D
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:44, archived)
# This is how most of my dates end.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:52, archived)
# The '®' tickled me immensely.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:06, archived)
# You can't be too careful
there might be a company rep watching and I'm sure they'd want their products portrayed in the best light :)
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:12, archived)
# Some sort of hamster thing
looking worried by what Moggy just posted
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:49, archived)
# Crickets.


sexy crickets.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:51, archived)
# Jokes are better than technique.
Come up with your own.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:53, archived)
# Assad of Syria wearing an asshat of cereal.
Or a parliament of tramps holding a kangaroo court over a pile of bound and gagged NOTW journalists who each have a nokia 3210 stuffed into their bleeding urethras.

edit/ smallbrainfield should do the first one

editedit/ in the second one, please note, no one is hiding anywhere watching and violently masturbating, I really wish you'd stop putting that in your pictures.

(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 13:55, archived)
# 3210 FTMFW
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:05, archived)
# Do I win a prize? I hope not.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:26, archived)
# Hooray!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:31, archived)
# Oh but you do
I've despatched a man to deliver it to you
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:31, archived)
# Bugger.
Did you like the weetabix eyebrows? I thought they were a nice touch given it's his thread and all.
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:35, archived)
# A very nice touch!
*touches*
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:37, archived)
# margaret thatcher falling down the stairs, cracking her head open, she slumps clawing at the wall while choking on her own blood
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:08, archived)
# Aah, a feelgood story!
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:12, archived)
# Batman spanking Catwoman with a paddle which says "I am the night"
While Commissioner Gordon finds it strangely amusing
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:22, archived)
#
amusing arousing
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:25, archived)
# He'll just park up a seat and break out the popcorn
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:27, archived)
# A pile of shit with two flies.
One fly could be named Dave. XD
(, Mon 27 Feb 2012, 14:46, archived)