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2000 Posts!

2000th post

I was going to try and be funny (for once) and post something I made and make people laugh and yell ‘woo yay’. I even thought about doing an ultra-special b3tv news report (there will be more soon, I promise).

Then I realised I needed to say something.

I’m physically old enough to be a Dad to some of the board contributors (Flanflinger and Fat Boab would say old enough to be Grandad!) and I don’t want to sound ageist in what I’m about to say so please ‘bear’ with me.

Recently, the messageboard has been littered (as in rubbish) with petty squabbles. As far as I can see these, on the whole, are the result of b3tans being intolerant of each other and newbies and in most cases avoidable…

I therefore make the following requests of EVERYONE.

Please can we get back to the days of being nice to each other and IF someone gets upset then to think twice before retaliating like with like (it’s how wars start, look East!).

If a new member doesn’t follow the board rules or read the FAQ, could the regulars point out the error nicely – I think the phrase ‘silly chicken’ is excellent!

Well that’s it. Not very exciting for a 2000th post. Some of you will mutter ‘silly old silver surfer’ but if everyone counted to 10 before reacting, the board would be a nice place again – at the moment it is in danger of losing all of what it stands for, and besides, you are all a bunch of tarts and I love you all.

Thanks for putting up with an ‘Oldie’

thebear

(

thebear is thebear, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:34, archived)

silly

chicken

(_, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:35, archived)

Ah bless

Now, do you need to go to the toilet?

*runs*

(Mattyboy, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:35, archived)

congrats on 2000 posts

I'm not old enough to be able to count up to 10 yet...

(

Jadeviper was still alive on, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:35, archived)

silly chicken!

you've just wasted a thread ;)

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:35, archived)

hey you!

fuck off!

too much text, you N00b!! :)

[edit]The temptation to delete this sub-thread now is almost... overwhelming...

(

Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:36, archived)

The board is not for insulting people

you stupid bitch

(_, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:39, archived)

This board is not for people

you silly slut

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:40, archived)

where all

sluts!

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:41, archived)

Arseholes

(

Samsonite, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:42, archived)

Your all guy

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:43, archived)

Your mum

(Monk3yspunkmop3d throws grenades, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:52, archived)

WHERE?

/hides

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:57, archived)

No sluts,

sutting sluts who slut about all day.
Here a slut.
There a slut.
Everywhere a slut, slut.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:43, archived)

You're all

cupid stunts

(

Samsonite, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:47, archived)

no. you forget.

I am a dirty hoor.

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:43, archived)

HEY YOU CUNT

DON'T CALL THAT COW A BITCH!!!

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:43, archived)

SORRY

Kitten, not Cow. Wrong animal.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:44, archived)

I'm the cow,

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:45, archived)

wouldn't you be

a bull?
*confuzzled*

(

mnb098mnb used to be here, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:47, archived)

No,

I'm a strange breed of human male cow.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:48, archived)

as I have just pointed out

Bovine is a strange breed of sheep

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:51, archived)

Why sheep,

what does a sheep have to do with it?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:53, archived)

you're a sheep in a herd of cows. You've lived there for that long you just think you are.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:48, archived)

Now I'ma sheep?

Bah!

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:49, archived)

You're actualy a strange breed of sheep.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:51, archived)

A cow.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:51, archived)

Yeah

but you go BAH and not MOO. Plus you can work a computer and walk on 2 legs, but not in public.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:53, archived)

Are you suggesting that

Sheep are capable of using computers yet cows are not?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:54, archived)

NORMAL SHEEP CAN'T

But you're a specail sheep.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:56, archived)

So,

you're saying that I'm a computer using sheep that thinks I'm cow becasue I'm special?

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:57, archived)

You think you're a cow

cuz you've lived with them for so long. You're specail because you can use a computer and walk on 2 legs. Why do you need me to tell you this? Can't you see for yourself?

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:00, archived)

I'm going home

because you are deranged.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:01, archived)

See ya later

I'm not deranged, just different. You see, I'm a dog that thinks he's a cat and has this special knowledge that lets me know when other animals think they're something they're not.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:11, archived)

As his vet and lover

I can confirm he is 100% cow

(

thebear is thebear, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:53, archived)

Thank you,

darling.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:55, archived)

You're a rubish vet then!!!

I can tell from here he/she isn't a cow.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:57, archived)

I have letters after my name that prove

I am a very good vet.

thebear vgvet

see

(

thebear is thebear, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:01, archived)

I wan't to see

evidance. Not just some silly little letters you've typed in to try and make me think you're telling the truth.

I think this is the most in depther conversation I've ever had on this site

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:13, archived)

Well that would be fun come milking time

(Mattyboy, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:45, archived)

You silly old chicken,

we love you.

(

bovine I'm so old, even my old is old, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:36, archived)

Well said :)

And 2000 congratulations!!

(

Dr. Mercury, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:36, archived)

Hear hear...

...if I wanted to be nasty to people and have vicious arguments, I would stay in real life.

btw - stop fucking wasting threads eh? :)

(

Mystery_Bob, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:36, archived)

Seconded too. Let's all be friends eh?

So what's all this about thread wasting? Is there a limit to how many threads there can be?

(pattybutty and chips, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:40, archived)

Yup

20 per page, and then they drop offf into the time spazz

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:46, archived)

you can only fit 20

threads to a page, the old ones slunk off into the archive. it's generally better to post a pic to start a new thread.

increase the peace!

(

munkt0n, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:46, archived)

There can only be

a maximum of 20 threads visable on the board at once. So when someone wastes a thread with crap not realy say anything important then it will push someones masterpeice off the board...Unless it's pushing a wasted thread off the board anyway.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:47, archived)

the board can only hold 20 threads at a time...

...before they are pushed back into the spazz.

It can be slightly annoying if your photoshop masterpiece slips off the end of the board when someone posts something like "I'm having sausages for tea".

I was only joking btw Mr Bear - your post was good thread usage if I may say so.

(

Mystery_Bob, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:48, archived)

At this point

I would like to point out that they do not get pushed into me. I'm a different spaz. I'm spelt different.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:50, archived)

Extremely Disturbing Image

cheers for that.

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:52, archived)

Well it was kinda confusing me.

the thought of all the old threads being pushed into me. I don't keep them...it's fnord that must keep them cuz he's the only one that can ever find them.

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:54, archived)

I think he keeps them tucked into his bosom.

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:57, archived)

I wouldn't mention bosoms

I just got slated for making a joke about them...

when someone finds the remainder of the boards sense of humor can they let me know? I'm off back to my hole

(

Samsonite, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:05, archived)

Ta very much y'all

So (asking with the innocence of a three year old asking why the sky is blue), is the spazz infinitely massive or is there a restriction on that too? (can you tell I've not been around long yet?)

(pattybutty and chips, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:08, archived)

Depends

on which one you are referring to.
The Time Spazz is infinite, Az the Spaz is finite.

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:11, archived)

What do you mean?

There's no end to the lenght of me;)

(

AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:15, archived)

Now

you're getting confused. You Az, not Spazz. Spazz infinite, Spaz finite.
There, that should clear it up.

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:19, archived)

Seconded

And have this for your 2000

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:36, archived)

as a relative newbie..

..i dont know any of you peeps but HELLO! and congrats to you monsieur bear on this your 2000th post.
may your next 2000 be as enjoyable.

(

MrHaze likes to poo, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:38, archived)

HELLO!

(

Dr Drink, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:41, archived)

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:42, archived)

Wotcha cock

(might trip over it)

(Mattyboy, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:48, archived)

Especially next to bacon slicers

oof!

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:49, archived)

Arraight

mush

(_, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:58, archived)

*hug*

That is all.

(

Samsonite, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:36, archived)

congrats

you silly old chicken :)

(

Dr Drink, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:37, archived)

nicely said

have a werthers' original

(

butchbint, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:37, archived)

shouldn't he be giving you one?

(

Dr Drink, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:40, archived)

snigger

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:41, archived)

can't remember

the first time, sadly

(

butchbint, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:45, archived)

Start worrying

when you can't remember the last time.

(

GR33DY, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:59, archived)

nor can i

(

thebear is thebear, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:03, archived)

Who's the Grandad now?

at least, that's what I say...

(

dr_fonz, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:45, archived)

and a werthers original too

fnarr

(

Monkeyboy, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:47, archived)

Congrats on being 2000!

Still no thoughts on where to go for beers tomorrow night?

(Glis, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:38, archived)

there speaks

the voice of raisin. congrats old fella.

(

stouffer, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:39, archived)

well said

that elderly gent! ;)

(

munkt0n, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:39, archived)

congratulations old boy

keep up the Kofi Annan work there.

(

Fat Boab of dailyreckless.com fame, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:39, archived)

*wipes tear from eye*

This is quite possibly one of the best uses for a celebratory post I've seen.

(

Ijon Tichy, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:42, archived)

Quite right

you speak sense. 2000 posts ahoy. congratulations sir.

(

Monkeyboy, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:42, archived)

I proclaim that message to be

(

brainstuff can eat a whole shredded wheat, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:42, archived)

congrats

and ta for the wise words.
/tokes

(

iamhyperdog, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:48, archived)

thanks gramps

see wisdom does come with age

(

Pootle, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:49, archived)

well done

I'm too old to be here too, I feel like I'm going to be arrested for b3tan fiddling.
Keep on keeping on anyway

(

cr4, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:51, archived)

The oldies united

will never be defeated.

Right on, man.

(

Cassidy : Vissi d'arte, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:51, archived)

AAWW BLESS

the senile old duffer has gone soft in his old age or so his missus says, but he has some special little triangly blue tablets to help with that ;o)

If you want to have a petty childish argument then use m3ss3ng3r, but don't copy the sodding world and his wife in on it sheeeeesh

Oh and you old chap were gonna ring me back yesserday, I've been sitting by the phone now for 23 hours and my incontinance pants need changing

Woo for having grey hair...or no hair at all sorry boab :o)

(

FlanFlinger 🥧, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:54, archived)

sorry

my bathchair broke and it was the nurses day off and I couldn't get to the telephone

t'morrow =:>)

(

thebear is thebear, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 16:58, archived)

b3ta is good people.

as is bear.

you silly silver surfer.

I missed what happened that caused this, but that's probably better that way.

(

zog why change it now?, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:04, archived)

No problems Bear

Sound advice, if only the world had more of you in it peraps we wouldn't been in this blinkin mess. Tis why sometimes I prefer to lurk and just read coz people can get the wrong end of the stick. Silly Chickens, that's such a great slogan. I'm gonna teach it to my younger chaps here at work as swearing really gets my goat. Respect dude. Keep the news coming it's fab !

(whore-monger Thermal rotating gimbal sprockets !!, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 17:10, archived)

1...2...3...4...6.

That'll never work ;-)

Nice post, and happy 2000'th!

(

discostu oh my, its back, Tue 21 Jan 2003, 20:10, archived)