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New Keyboard

I have been cleaning and tarting up an old keyboard. It has mechanical keys. They go click.
I am just wondering what would die the main body plastic.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:20, archived)

Red food dye

That stains ANYTHING

(Mrs Trellis GIN, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:21, archived)

Blackcurrent

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:22, archived)

Good idea

I like it.
But what if I don't want it red?
(Thought RED is now growing on me)

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:22, archived)

Pour red wine on it

Turn it purple

(Mrs Trellis GIN, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:26, archived)

I was thinking

of taning it like leather.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:31, archived)

creosote!

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:33, archived)

can't get real creosote

the liberals were crying about the fumes making people high, so it is now early learning safe

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:34, archived)

Which is

why I stockpiled in the 80s.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:35, archived)

thank god for solvent cement

that stuff is a god send some days

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:37, archived)

that explains why the price of creosote spiralled out of control...

you may even be responsible for the current GLOBAL FINANCIAL CRISIS(TM) as a result.

(

mutster101 fell over, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:03, archived)

inject yourself with smack before painting the fence

that should sort you out

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:36, archived)

I just sniff solvent cement at work if i need a high on a shit day

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:38, archived)

what do you do if you need a shit on a high day?

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:43, archived)

don't put the glue on my arsehole

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:47, archived)

wise words there mate

(

mutster101 fell over, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:08, archived)

i've got red wine by my keyboard right now

but i'm pouring it down my throat instead - much better idea :)

(

kingsuperspecial is in an audience, wanking furiously, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:33, archived)

As Mrs Trellis mentioned, dye should do the trick

I have read articles on using clothing dye to color (oops, colour) plastics

(

PedroHin Come along & ride on a Flantastic Voyage, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:01, archived)

Amiga 500

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:22, archived)

I have to

I have to die the body plastic with an Amiga500? Does it come in 250ml bottles?

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:23, archived)

it looks like an Amiga 500

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:24, archived)

yes

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:24, archived)

Hmm

a little I suppose

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:27, archived)

lovely :)

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:28, archived)

That is probaby a

mechanical keyboard there too

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:30, archived)

I wish I still had mine

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:33, archived)

you can have mine

(for five million pounds)

(duketh *raises rifle* everyone loves muffins!!!!!!, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:51, archived)

You have have mine for 4 million!

(Pandemonium in my underpants, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 18:47, archived)

that kezboard is german

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:36, archived)

it also

loves to be spanked.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:37, archived)

with powerful german Schpaank padles

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:39, archived)

and hairy legs

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:41, archived)

shouting things like "OH GOTT! JA!!! OH JA!!"

and that

like on mary poppins

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:43, archived)

I think you mean shitty shitty bung bung

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:44, archived)

OH JA!

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:46, archived)

Whilst weargin

Lederhosen (sp?) and garters with the plushy head of a big friendly bear.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:41, archived)

This is all good, and completely obligatory for Germanyland

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:42, archived)

that

and I suppose eating bratwurst and being really good at shit.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:49, archived)

you can't beat a good knockwurst!

for sure

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:51, archived)

certainly can't

knock it.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:53, archived)

I'm not sure what you mean by

mechanical keys. What's that?

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:23, archived)

a robot comes in and presses the key you think about

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:24, archived)

Is it Bender?

Or that bendy-armed fuck of off that old show?

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:27, archived)

metal mickey

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:30, archived)

Oh fuck no

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:31, archived)

the other monkey

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:36, archived)

Tweeky? Robbie the Robot? Dusty Bin?

no it's a very pointy robot that jabs away like an old type writer

It's shit really, but people say wow that's like steampunk and so retro cool and I say "yeah, you twats"

and they laugh

so I call them twats again until they stop and finally fuck off

its harsh but they do need telling

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:33, archived)

You could build a robot to do that for you.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:35, archived)

now that's a fucking plan

I will design it now

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:37, archived)

may I be the first to say

FP THIS NOW!

:D

sorry, I'm too exciteable

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:39, archived)

colour it in your wankers!

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:43, archived)

fuck yeah!

:D

*unzips*

I'm gonna lacquer this fucker good!

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:44, archived)

aim for the eyes!

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:45, archived)

ahh, country style

good idea

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:46, archived)

Sneak attack critical on Twat-Bot!

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:48, archived)

*CASTS +10 OCCULAR WEE BLAST*

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:49, archived)

Personally

I can't wait for alternative-energy-driven punk to get popular.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:47, archived)

personally I can't wait for efficient implementation of convential scientific and engineering paradigm-punk

it'll be totally generic, man

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:48, archived)

Eco-Punk

smashing the system with root vegetables and chunky knit sweaters

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:49, archived)

cave-punk

I am waiting for 70s-IBM-Punk.
www.squareamerica.com/ib.htm

everything styled like this.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:52, archived)

a mechanical twatbot

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:37, archived)

only mechanics can use it

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:24, archived)

My repair skill is 80

but I'm level 20 now so I'm pretty much stuck with it.
Sometimes I think it would be better if I hadn't left the Vault at all.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:26, archived)

hamz

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:27, archived)

I think he means they have microswitches instead of leaf switches

(

mugatu, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:26, archived)

leaf switches tend to give up and fall off at this time of year though

(

HappyToast Groat froth, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:34, archived)

...which is why this season is known as

switch.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:36, archived)

I have maniacal keys.

The bastards have little bitey teeth.

(

Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:26, archived)

They click

click like clicky bastards

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:29, archived)

There are three kinds of

Keyboard mechanism:
Mechanical - Each key is a seperate switch. They last longer and click when pressed.
Membrane - Rubber sheet with little contacts underneith. Used in most keyboards. Cheaper, lower profile. Not as clicky.
Scisor Keyswitch membrane - It's like membrane, but with some plastic stuff. Laptops use this alot.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:27, archived)

You are not too clued

up on the properties of plastic then?
Check the faq and see if it says anything about computer modding. Then check google maybe?

methinks you need paint and lacquer.

(

Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:29, archived)

or a computer hardware modding site

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:32, archived)

What?

Nonsense. Why do that when it would be perfectly acceptable to go on b3ta and say "Stop what you are doing, I have a 15 year old keyboard and it's important that you all see it".

(

Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:34, archived)

blam

the point is made twice.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:37, archived)

thats what google is for

it also has ham on it

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:40, archived)

I also wanted to show people what I did.

I needed a large group of people who were likely to say something in response.

I like the paint and licking idea.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:35, archived)

Sniffing is the way to go.

Then your keyboard will be all sort of colours.

(

Kamikaze Stoat £4.09, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:37, archived)

Especially if

I use car paint.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:39, archived)

properties of plastic?

I am not sure plastic owns any particular abodes. However the proceeds from plastic probably do. Especially as they are tied to oil. There is lots of money in that.

Computer modding, this isn't computer modding. It's dying a keyboard. And cleaning. I think you and I need to talk semantics.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:33, archived)

I hate jews and like to use the wrong words for things

I am antisemantic.

(

Mystery_Bob, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:39, archived)

I had to read that a coupld of times

so good work

(even though the joke doesn't work....semanticly)

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:41, archived)

you crazy pendant, you and all the other pendant's will drive us to ruin!

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:42, archived)

I think you need to stop being concerned with semantics

and figure out why press-moulded polypropylene is going to be able to absorb a dye now that it is no longer liquid.
As I said, you need to understand the properties of plastic.

(

Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:40, archived)

You now come out with a

A truth I need to know. I know the properties of some things, not others. It appears that plastic is not one of them. I will need to not dye, I will need to cover it with a hardy new coating. Carpaint is my current favorite.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:44, archived)

and lots of lacquer

as the clear coat is what will give you durability.
A coat or 3 of spray paint will just start to flake and chip.

Also the plastic will need to be thoroughly de-greased with an alcohol like ethanol or isopropanol. Then you will most likely need a key coat plastic primer to go on after you have rubbed the whole thing down with a rubber sanding pad.

(

Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:50, archived)

you do this for a living. Or are just a bigger geek in more areas than me?

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:55, archived)

I was in the building trade commercially

and an arm of my business was industrial paint spraying of anything from ship hulls to the walls in about 50 M&S branches that were clad in gloss plastic.

(

Pasanonic 's been known to cause insanity in laboratory mice, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:59, archived)

fair whip crack

nice.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:04, archived)

analine dyes might do it

but as they are spirit based you might run into a few melting problems, the best you are likely to get is a bit of a tint, spray the bugger and have done with it, or stop mucking about and spray something else instead. lets face it, customised keyboards, computer boxes and such look shit.

(

god save the queen making another unremarkable comeback, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:52, archived)

I don't care if it looks shit

I am just trying to fill my life before I die. Flaking? That worried me.

Everything looks shit to someone. And these keyboards type GOOD! :)

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:56, archived)

GOOD

I just typed GOOD (eek, twice) on my keyboard

THIS IS MY FUCKING KEYBOARD

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:58, archived)

it looks

It looks like you have very small travel on your keys there. I have about 4mm travel on these keys. You have 2mm most. :)

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:02, archived)

it's an ok keyboard to type on

I can get a decent speed

unlike most keyboards in this style, which suck donkey-horse

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:04, archived)

oh, I didn't notice this post :)

therefore, spray it, then lacquer the fucker is the way to go :D

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:40, archived)

Spray paint

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:32, archived)

Car paint

BRILLIANT. That is the kind of idea I was looking for. There is a car paint shop thing down the road a little bit. :)

Cars have lots of colours I have heard.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:39, archived)

just rember to write the letters back on

(~MMD and where dose one what this so hard?, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:45, archived)

I have also

already coloured out the letters.
I can take the case apart - spray that and put it back together. Could do top one colour and bottom the other. Then I would win big.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:48, archived)

You might need

to use some sort of etching primer - car paint is not particularly good at sticking to things that have not been prepared the right way.

(

Mystery_Bob, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:52, archived)

I ponder this also

unless someone tells me better

cheerful choice of spraypaint + white/black letraset as appropriate and then laquer the fucker

because "laquering the fucker" just sounds cool

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:38, archived)

In the film "Hackers" some kid sprays a camo pattern on his keyboard

(

epiphany coming live from sweden, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:41, archived)

this is known as "camoing the fucker"

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:43, archived)

that is fucking sad

(

Duke Otterby you pre-verts, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:43, archived)

hahahahaha

yes

it's not possible to add to this statement, so I'll just laugh

:)

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:45, archived)

...and then he can't find it any more.

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:45, archived)

it probably plays auld lang syne when he whistles

and like, lights up

and shakes

fucking shaking keyboard

vibration white finger

baadda a fofofofororrroor ttptptpypypypiyigiignnngnngng

and then limbs drop off

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:47, archived)

FASTER!!

(

mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:49, archived)

flflfhlafhlhlahahahaohasss s assttht ththehrheherlrelhaeh i/rehlafelasef.f.

*POP*

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:50, archived)

what colour would you like it

im sure some one will photo shop it

(~MMD and where dose one what this so hard?, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:43, archived)

Well

A graphite version might be cool.
Wood effect?
Granite.
Cammo.
Vagina.
Beard colour.
Polyethaline.
Craola brown.
Mothercare.

(beard looking less like a homeless everyday, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:46, archived)

what about all purpose rhubarb colour?

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:49, archived)

what a cool colour this would be

graphite-Wood effect-Granite-Cammo-Vagina-Beard-Polyethaline-Craola brown-Mothercare

any one got the hex code for that?

(~MMD and where dose one what this so hard?, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:50, archived)

yes

it's 0X3

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:51, archived)

(~MMD and where dose one what this so hard?, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 16:53, archived)

no worries

(

discomeats This canoe, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:01, archived)

is that a derivative of the IBM model M?

original IBM M keyboards can fetch a fortune on eBay uk

/sold two, for lots of munney :)

(

Haku Orange Whip? Orange Whip? Three Orange Whips., Sun 16 Nov 2008, 17:48, archived)

Hammerite paint

(

Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 18:00, archived)

Turmeric

(

Parmesan Quality b4 Quantity, Sun 16 Nov 2008, 19:34, archived)