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# bloody Royal Mail and damn Amazon for entrusting urgent weekend deliveries to them
No knock on the door, no doorbell rang, so at 4.36 pm, I decided to walk the ten feet or so to my front door to see if I could spot a delivery van.
Poking through the letterbox was a ‘Sorry, you were out’ card, time stated 4.35 pm.
If there is a next time, I'll be prepared.
(I helped save b3ta! beaubodor blogless, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:12, archived)
# they are
without doubt
completely useless cunts
(I helped save b3ta! SiX and his hat, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:13, archived)
# I once got a £30 book left leaning on my door.
They couldn't even be bothered to fill in the card. I live in a housing association
flat where theft of post is common.
(I helped save b3ta! Bela Lugosi's Dad, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:30, archived)
# postman pat epic fail
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:13, archived)
# Postman Twat!
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:20, archived)
# Pfffffffffffffft
(I helped save b3ta! elephant rider property shark sighted!, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:20, archived)
# haha good one
fuck why didn't i think of that, what a nob
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:20, archived)
# you want a nob?
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:22, archived)
# im begining to think it maximises my chances by increasing the sample size,
but it was an unfortunate typo, corrected so you look silly mwhahahaa.
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:25, archived)
# *sedates*
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:29, archived)
# No...
"k3b/-\b Nob" does not sound as good as "Postman Twat"
(I helped save b3ta! Wobbly Bloke Hello, did I miss anything on, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:28, archived)
# Hahaha brilliant!
I get this all the time with the posties here in Barcelona.
(I helped save b3ta! slight yoinks!, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:14, archived)
# Fucking hell.
(I helped save b3ta! NinjaBadger hides in the bushes and gives you TB., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:14, archived)
# Cnuts!



(I helped save b3ta! Mstandot I suppose I should post more often., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:14, archived)
# Indeed! I think we' ve all been there!
Had a terrible time getting a big heavy parcel once, exactly this occurred twice, then on the third arranged delivery I literally sat myself right by the door in total silence all morning and caught the bastard sneaking thru the gate, the look on his face as he held his 'sorry you were out' card was only bettered by the one he was pulling when he had to go all the way back to his van (parked around the corner out of sight BTW) and carry the big weighty box all the way over to my house, I even made him come up my garden stairs with it and plonk it right onto my carpet.

Cnut...
(I helped save b3ta! ..wil, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:18, archived)
# I like this ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:19, archived)
# ha!
you should have kicked his arse on the way out
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:19, archived)
# Haha!
I was just glad to get it, it was a Robosapien V2 a couple of years ago when they were new and amazing things, and I got an amazing deal on an ex shop display model sold unseen online (£20!)

It was a tad tatty but worked fine, BTW, but it did weigh a ton as for some reason it had the batteries in it!

Best bargain I ever got, tho I never dared take such a chance before or since...
(I helped save b3ta! ..wil, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:26, archived)
# hahaha ownt!
(k3b/-\b Peace man., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:22, archived)
# the only thing you could have done to top that off would be to take a picture
nice work
(munzor in the jungle, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:32, archived)
# ParcelFarce
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:18, archived)
# Arf!
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:20, archived)
# pfft!
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:25, archived)
# I hate to think how many times I've had that happen to me.
This demands to be made into a sticker or something...
(I helped save b3ta! Matazone has new icons, but is keeping this one, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:18, archived)
# I'd love to do that
But I guess the posties would assume you were an arrogant tw@t and smash up your goods.

Sigh, it's a no win.
(I helped save b3ta! elephant rider property shark sighted!, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:20, archived)
# Oh God, this

but Mushroom is right too, I've had just about every parcel delivery company pull that one.

I once had a postie leave a card and get up the road/out of sight in the time it took me to walk downstairs and open the door- he must have pre-written the card then bloody run for it, there's no other explanation!
(I helped save b3ta! Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:18, archived)
# *fondles inappropriately*
Hello lovely!
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:21, archived)
# Hello!
*return fondles*

Sorry to hear about your fall, but glad you didn't get any serious injuries!
(I helped save b3ta! Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:24, archived)
# actually not sure I didn't
going to get an x-ray on the morrow....
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:25, archived)
# Eep!
*careful fondles*
*crosses fingers*
(I helped save b3ta! Jessie © needs pirate name suggestions, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:26, archived)
# 'kinell, your website is amazing.
Loving your work. *Saves to computer*

Don't forget your 10,000th post!

:)
(I helped save b3ta! elephant rider property shark sighted!, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:18, archived)
# Royal Mail?
There should be something under the Trades Descriptions Act to get them on that name.

Feckin useless bastuds
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:19, archived)
# utter arseclowns... I've had exactly the same problem
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:22, archived)
# *at home, in pyjamas LOL*
'arseclowns' - brilliant....
(I helped save b3ta! J Peasemould Gruntfuttock Alpha Mike Foxtrot, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:24, archived)
# It's in Office Space I believe.
Now I can't hear the name Michael Bolton without thinking of the same word.
(I helped save b3ta! M3rx likes the Asian ladies, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 15:58, archived)
# often they don't even carry your parcel to save on space.
or so I have heard.

they are also controlled by shapeshifting reptiles.
(I helped save b3ta! arrangedletters, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:26, archived)
# controlled by shapeshifting reptiles - the parcels, or the postmen?
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:31, archived)
# us all
just ask David Icke.

also something mumbled about how if we could harness the power of pyramid crystals we would solve all the worlds problems.

videos on crystal power on youtube are hillarious :D
(I helped save b3ta! arrangedletters, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:42, archived)
# hahaha! It's almost depressing to hear about that sort of thing. It's as bad as all this creationism nonsense.
(I helped save b3ta! theoriginalsteve <this space intentionally left blank>, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:44, archived)
# I had DHL do this to me when I'd taken the day off work.
It then took a week, seven or eight phone calls and three visits to the depot to recover my parcel.
(I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:36, archived)
# Our postman is called Bob and has been fully instructed as to what to do
if there are no cars on our driveway.

If there are cars knock like knocking is about to be banned in 30 seconds time.
(I helped save b3ta! Quijibo Esq. BSc. May contain traces of nuts, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:41, archived)
# This
Happens all the time to me. The other thing is that the post never turns up at (roughly) the same time every day, so it's pot luck if you catch the postie, unless you stay in all day.
Wankers.
(I helped save b3ta! VandenPlas can't think of anything clever - no change there!, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:45, archived)
# or my best being the day i came home
to find my (quite obviously a) PS3 game i'd orderd simply sat on my step propped against the front door, which is 3 paces from a gate on the MAIN FRIGGIN ROAD. God knows how i got away with that one, it must have been there all day.
(I helped save b3ta! Victor Meldrew, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:59, archived)
# it is not just royal mail
Scottish gas did it to me when I was waiting in for them to do a safety check on our boiler
(I helped save b3ta! Bobby Bob Bob also available on http://jbobw.deviantart.com/, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 13:50, archived)
# our door bell button is huge, and in the middle of the door, and at eye level...
...and they still sodding knock.
(I helped save b3ta! ms morbo lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 14:03, archived)
# I am tempted to print this out
and stick it on the front door
(I helped save b3ta! WOLF .™, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 14:09, archived)
# At the risk of sounding like everyone else
YES. This often happens here too. Must be company policy to be as half-arsed as possible.
(I helped save b3ta! Tribs 🦇 ↓ dn ʎɐʍ sᴉɥʇ ↓🦇, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 14:35, archived)
# the postman stopped seeing if i was in
after i had a go at him for forcing a parcel through(and breaking) the catflap instead of knocking
(horrid, Mon 2 Feb 2009, 15:24, archived)
# a case of "see also"...
www.flickr.com/photos/kingsuperspecial/527686534/

Grrrrr :S
(I helped save b3ta! kingsuperspecial is in an audience, wanking furiously, Tue 3 Feb 2009, 6:50, archived)