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I've just had a great idea

Just thought i'd let you know.

(

Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:40, archived)

I've thought about killing everyone I know

too.

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:43, archived)

Ooh that's a good idea

I'd only thought of killing everyone I didn't know till I saw that.

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:47, archived)

Well

I'd thought of killing everyone that Rob knows, but I don't know who Rob knows...

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Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:43, archived)

they tried to clone a horse but...

you know the rest.

(que, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:35, archived)

that is really

frightening

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:47, archived)

I need

THIS for a movie!

(FoxA / DannyWeinkauf, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:18, archived)

i'm afraid

his bags are packed for the glue factory. but for the right price...

(que, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:39, archived)

Hmmm...

Now that "Which is better?" is dead, how about "Which was better?" where you can scan through the database of results from when it still worked?

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Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:22, archived)

I was thinking the same thing in the shower this morning

Luckily I grabbed the database before it all collapsed.

There is enough stuff in there for it to metasearch its own database and give a result anyway...

You'd get bored pretty fast just leafing through the entries - there are 55,000 of them.

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:27, archived)

You keep your database in the shower?

That's very cool.

(

mrbrong, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:46, archived)

or very wet

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:59, archived)

What are you going

to do now your shower has all collapsed?

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:05, archived)

So you're dangling

from the database now then, above the wreckage of the shower?

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:10, archived)

I rise above

this idiocy

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:49, archived)

In which case

we will call you names and steal your dinner money.

Ner ner ne ner ner!

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:56, archived)

Is the database

full of helium then?

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 10:13, archived)

in a salad-powered fit I've

stuck me desktop on SUYDT..... dunno why :)

(

witchy is covered in BEES, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:22, archived)

Thanks Nacho

That was a fine explanation. I now fully understand women and their shoe obsession. In light of this revelation I have decide to go into the shoe business:

Available mail order for only £129.99.

(TommyTheMuff is a new dad and luvvin it, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:09, archived)

Put me down for a pair

size 4

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 15:23, archived)

ooh la larvae

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:03, archived)

they look luvly

can you send me some over please?

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:25, archived)

Surely that should be

Larvae Balaclavae :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:28, archived)

Ha. Yes. Surely they should be.

On the subject of larvae clothing, I invented this a few years ago. One day I should go back through all that old stuff and do images for them.

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:34, archived)

there is

certainly a gap in the market - the larvae enthusiast pound is worth a lot.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:43, archived)

Yes

the pink pound is so yesterday. The switched on marketeer is aiming for the pupae pound these days.

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:50, archived)

buy your own

(kieranw, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:01, archived)

please expalin this:

www.conclaveobscurum.ru

(russellsprout, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:32, archived)

Just the thing to end my day with

In spite of the fact that its 9am here ;)
That has got to be about the most unique web interfaces I have ever run across. The inside of that guy's head must be a very scary place indeed.

(

Whiffert Support the Free Balogna Movement!, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:49, archived)

Reminds me of...

...another guy with a big head.

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pabulum, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:32, archived)

Stunning...

That site should be geiger counted!

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Kaiser, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:58, archived)

stunning

is there audio too? (my pc is deaf)that how to fly thing was incredible

(

wangolini, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:59, archived)

the audio

is even scarier - get your pc a hearing aid

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:03, archived)

Er... Yes

Very peculiar.

Try Tool's site for more oddness...

(Hairy_Chris, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:05, archived)

Eh?

Tool is indeed Lord Mayor of Odd City (pop. many, and counting)

(

CarlosTheJackal, protector of innocence, taker of liberties, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 9:24, archived)

scary

but brilliant

(

bazman, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:36, archived)

Possibly the lamest gag I've ever made (requires sound)

What do you want for dinner kids?

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:29, archived)

ah. you liked the page I found.

well done joel.

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:49, archived)

Sorry Kids!

I thought you said you wanted a...

Groan!

Deli Llama!

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:14, archived)

Have a go...

(

Kaiser, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:22, archived)

I was watching the curlers last night

I loved the way they slide with the puck. Very cool.

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:11, archived)

I wonder

if you could use one of those similarily shaped kettles instead of the proper curling stone?

And a rake instead of a brush?

And polar bears instead of people?

Hmmm.... :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:18, archived)

Do I sense...

...that something is on its way? *

(

Kaiser, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:30, archived)

No promises

I'll see... :)

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:34, archived)

AndyK with Rob's eyes and Nacho's hair

Bee-yaow-ti-ful

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:00, archived)

a b3ta composite

uber person. we will all meld, eventually.

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:03, archived)

See, this is what happens when you're too skint to

go out shoe shopping at lunch, and you have to sit infront of a PC and entertain yourself.
I've just put AndyK's eyes and mouth on a lizard and it looks extremely female.

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:12, archived)

I've never met

a woman who wasn't an Imelda Marcos in the making. What is it with you lot and shoes?

(TommyTheMuff is a new dad and luvvin it, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:19, archived)

Shoes are great. Trainers, boots, high heels, kitten heels, slingbacks...they're great.

They're great cos a new pair of shoes makes your outfit look different, and no matter how much weight you put on, they still fit you, which is why bags are so great as well.
And when you've got a face like this, it's best to try and get people's attention towards your feet...

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:28, archived)

B3ta-Lo

When you look like this your arse needs to be that great.

(TommyTheMuff is a new dad and luvvin it, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:52, archived)

Stop it!

You look like Tara Palmer Tomkinson...

(TommyTheMuff is a new dad and luvvin it, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:12, archived)

The one of Crab Bloke with Andy K's eyes

looks frighteningly like one of the blokes in my office.
I just showed him. He wasn't too impressed.

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:16, archived)

i clicked a link, and it generated about 5 popups... including

this. It's best with the sound on.

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:00, archived)

Anybody got the original

Kitty on Landmine image ?

People keep asking if I know where to get it from since it go posted on "Show Us Yer Desktop"...

(

flibz, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:55, archived)

there was a point a week or two back when I was

getting 5 emails a day about it. very odd.

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:58, archived)

Yeah,

I'm going to add a forum thingy to "Show Us Yer Desktop" so I can let it handle itself maybe...

(

flibz, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:00, archived)

The original was by

board member NoneMoreNegative, I believe, and I've stuck it Here

(

witchy is covered in BEES, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:39, archived)

my morning

completed whilst on hold..

(

wangolini, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:43, archived)

The same could be said

for blueyonder customer services. They have a strange idea of how long a 10 minute queue is...
cool animation though!

(

E.S.Blofeld, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:49, archived)

looks interesting, but I can't read the text

suggest slowing it down, and putting text onto a black block background.

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:07, archived)

better

now?

(

wangolini, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:17, archived)

Did they ever answer?

Yesterday arrived at the office to find fibre optic modem for phones dead. No phones, faxes or emails.

6 hours wating to even report the fault (by mobile, of course).

Eventually reported it because on of my partners nieces works for them. Yup, we NEVER got through to support to report that our 50 phone lines were dead.

10 o clock last night got phones back. 14 hours later.

Well done Telemar Rio de Janeiro. When you lose your momopoly, you're fuckin' dead!

(

Not Pineapple anymore, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 10:03, archived)

Meet my friend Jody...

cin you giss who it is yit?

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:40, archived)

Nothing particularly funny

But I love this policeman
And would gladly go to prison just to meet him

(

MartinH, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:36, archived)

Ummm...

You're scaring me now...

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:41, archived)

I'm sorry

Here is a picture of an old lady going mad on a golfcourse with a lightsabre
I hope this makes up for it in some way

(

MartinH, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:10, archived)

Much better yes.

It reminds me of an mpeg clip that I saw once (dunno where it was now), of a kid opening up a christmas present and finding a real lightsabre inside, which he swings around and chops his grandads head off etc. etc.

It was quite a funny clip... wish I could remember where I saw it now...

(

Lumpbucket tekcubpmuL, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:26, archived)

MTV?

I think it was them. ifilm might have it...

(

mrbrong, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 8:43, archived)

Yeh

who's the only 15 stone man to have ridden a Derby winner?
Lester Piggot's cellmate.

(

pabulum, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:48, archived)

He's good at this you know

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:55, archived)

is that Chief Wiggum

from the simpsons?

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:00, archived)

one

cops song of joy and love to his beautiful, beautiful penguin...........

(redifusion, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 7:26, archived)

crab bloke - look what i found

a list of model shops in the uk, that sell... rockets! woo!

(

pep, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:22, archived)

you can but these in Camden? wow!

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:29, archived)

I bought one (in Camden as well)

for my dad for his birthday.

He's very excited, but a bit miffed cos it said 'skill level: 2' on the side of the box.

Supposed to go to 500ft...

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:34, archived)

when is planning

to launch?

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:35, archived)

Dunno - He has to build a launch platform

first out of some bits of metal.
He's outside London - planning to launch on Chobham Common.
(which is nice as this is where the martians land in War of the Worlds)

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:37, archived)

Woo

I received a new stuffed penguin yesterday. He is the Penguin of Opportunity. Maybe he should be given the opportunity to be launched in a rocket.

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:47, archived)

right I know what Im upto for lunch

(

breel, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:36, archived)

(

Kaiser, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:09, archived)

The Pox

(the guys who did the pygmy shrew) have got a series of cartoons on the beeb site Just watched one, it was funny.

(

crab_bloke), Wed 20 Feb 2002, 5:47, archived)

i watched the first one

it was pretty good. but a team of about 15 people made it!

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:00, archived)

what was

the pygmy shrew?

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:01, archived)

try

here

(

rob, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:03, archived)

that's really

good.

(

monkeon schmonkeon, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:09, archived)

Worrying increase in ape-people in public

(

AndyK, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 5:38, archived)

Andy, I know EXACTLY what you mean...

(Nacho, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:36, archived)

Let me guess

you hadn't shaved that morning?

(

chthonic, Wed 20 Feb 2002, 6:40, archived)

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