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# My toaster exploded at the weekend.
Funny thing is, it made the toast that was in it, the most perfectly browned toast i have ever had. It was a crap toaster until it exploded, and reached the pinnacle of its toasting.

I have since replaced it with a toaster remeniscent to a limousine.

I thought you guys would care the most.
(stevkay, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:16, archived)
# You are correct...
When kitchen appliances turn poetic... ahhhh.
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:17, archived)
# I broke mine
by poking the red hot glowing bits with a knife because it made a funny buzzing noise...i dont even know what drew me to do it the first time, but all i know is it went REALLY bright then made a bit of a bang and smellt a bit
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:21, archived)
# Pretty much what happened her.
But mine had a nice jet of flame coming out of it!
(stevkay, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:29, archived)
# we care
much more than the others. oh yes!
(I helped save b3ta! freshlegs, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:31, archived)
# COOL
I didnt have flames

I had no bloody toast either come to think about it
(I helped save b3ta! AzToTheRescue The arsehole formally known as Az The S slur, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:32, archived)
# ooh
that happened to me with a hairdryer once.
(I helped save b3ta! the triple legendary unicorn, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:33, archived)
# I did that once in my boarding house at school
I somehow short-circuited the whole landing, so all the lights went out and it was very cold. Everyone was cross with me.

It's not like I meant to do it. :(
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:53, archived)
# "It's better to burn out...."
If my whole purpose in life was to toast and I finally produced that masterpiece of perfect toast that could never be surpassed, I would also choose to go out in a blaze of glory, kind of like Sid Vicious or Kurt Cobain or the Queen Mum.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:57, archived)
# mmm.
(I helped save b3ta! jiva nearly always up for a game of scrabble, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:16, archived)
# woo
really nice :)
(lostpixel, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:17, archived)
# haha!
fab!
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:21, archived)
# The Bert Conspiracy continues...

S is for Saddam, who's good enough for me.
(lsd4all, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:09, archived)
[challenge entry] The mistake that ended WWII
Yeah, yeah. Better late than never!

(CasualGovtObserver, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:04, archived)
# lol
DOH!
(BakeSnake, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:06, archived)
# since when
did Syd Little get involved in militaristic decision making.
(I helped save b3ta! itzpirate ~ walking the plank, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:39, archived)
# syd little
hehe made me laff

(and the original image of course)
(Harry Monk, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 22:11, archived)
# World's strongest man discovers new planet

Dat's nice, it'z prenounced KWAH-o-ar
(lsd4all, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:59, archived)
# Uuunnnnhhg!
Look what I pulled out me bum, ma!
(CasualGovtObserver, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:09, archived)
# i really really can't at the mo


so a themed repost!
(I helped save b3ta! popt_art, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:22, archived)
# blimey
he is having trouble!
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:28, archived)
# Damn Cafepress!
Does anyone know a similar company that will print on black t-shirts?
(Dogsdinner, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:52, archived)
# No
.
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:04, archived)
# i do i do!
If you live in glasgow. But i bet you dont. But anyway, its right outside kelvinbridge subway station, if u dont go up the big excalator, and they also do 1 off prints. which is nice.

Just trying to help. But not trying very hard.
(stevkay, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:11, archived)
# WOW! Is that place still there?
If it's the place I think, it was there when I lived down that way 10 years ago...
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:19, archived)
# ye meen
ye wis a weejiie, ken?
(I helped save b3ta! bananaman, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:23, archived)
# lived there a few years...
but not a fully fledged soap-dodger.
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:24, archived)
# Wow. How nice of you all to make fun of a poplulation of 5 million.
if anyone else did it i'd be angry.

And yes, its still there.
(stevkay, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:28, archived)
# sorry
i'm not massively familiar with scotland, but i picked up on the not liking glasgow from reading trainspotting
(I helped save b3ta! bananaman, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:30, archived)
# Actually... I really enjoyed Glasgow for a long long time...
and I still do whenever I head back. No offence intended.

Although what is it with the cities whose people pride themselves on their "great sense of humour" and take the piss out of everyone so well (glasgow, liverpool)? They turn fucking psycho when anyone takes the piss out of them...

(not necessarily your good self, of course)
(I helped save b3ta! chaotic_illuminator proud spacehopperist, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:33, archived)
# i think we take it pretty well,
considering the amount of shit we get :P
(I helped save b3ta! the triple legendary unicorn, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:37, archived)
# eh! eh!
carm down!
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Phil Kitten, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:58, archived)
# Britney the Bruiser

The toughest bitch on the streets.
(Dr Wadd, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:45, archived)
# Yike!
That's scary...

(techsmurf, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:48, archived)
# Please add your Nohands pics!
www.bakesnake.com/b3ta/nohands/

Thanx :o)
(BakeSnake, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:44, archived)
# splendid idea
well done that cooked serpent
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:50, archived)
# by the way
i put all i could find up, but havnt asked permission, so if anybody wants theirs down, i will oblige of course
(BakeSnake, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:59, archived)
# nice,
but how is it that around a third of the images are greater than 30k, when the upload file size max is 30k? are you taunting us?
(I helped save b3ta! freshlegs, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:09, archived)
# Unfairness
I didn't realised he was called no-hands kittten, I've always called him mind piss kitten. I shall get an f in my GCSE in b3tanese.
(I helped save b3ta! 100% kitten better than ever, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:17, archived)
# he was dubbed
mind piss kitten here. but the picture on ratemykitten was entitled "no hands". hence the confusion/double identity. hello!
(I helped save b3ta! freshlegs, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:21, archived)
# phew
he's not just using his mind-piss on me then. And hello you!
(I helped save b3ta! 100% kitten better than ever, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:23, archived)
# has anyone got the original mindpiss animation
I'll have a look
(I helped save b3ta! Professor Fnord Regius Professor of B3ta Chronology, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:35, archived)
# thanks
i forgot to set that. max size now is 256 kb, 800x600 pixels
(BakeSnake, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:28, archived)
# wheee!
(I helped save b3ta! freshlegs, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:33, archived)
# now I can't find my animation
booooooo
(I helped save b3ta! 100% kitten better than ever, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:41, archived)
# New Prodigy album?
(I helped save b3ta! Devious ...what?, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:37, archived)
# pwa ha ha ha
It looks like he's being absorbed by mind piss
(I helped save b3ta! mrbongo sweating like a formicophiliac on I'm a celebrity, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:42, archived)
# and very surprised by it too
w/y/h
(I helped save b3ta! the triple legendary unicorn, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:07, archived)
# a hat full of woo
and a metric cartload of yay!
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:51, archived)
# That is "3 Kilos"
of Woo, I say.
(Myrpok, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 23:20, archived)
# this isnt a racist joke... hes just a fool.
groups.msn.com/_Secure/0OgAAADkVfmF9kHV3dd4D9aMFWhpKFWBfSQciG*Aode7SUsy0xzGEvXXCqauwirwQqFxnzeX1H!HQCwoRqFyQes9zw*cXMi!8/MAJ.jpg" width="250">
(Ash_Pow is now available in extra medium, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:35, archived)
# Deleted the pic
but I did that last week. Woo yay!
(I helped save b3ta! Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:36, archived)
# She's actually a real person.


You can click here for a 213 KB animation of this that I think is pretty cool. (But again, I must remind you that I don't get out much.)

Edit: I've uploaded a possibly less-headache-inducing version, using the same file name.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:34, archived)
# who she
great post btw
(Mattyboy, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:36, archived)
# .
She's a friend of mine who's a med student. If you met her you'd never dream she could look like that. (She's really cute, of course, but in a waifish kind of way.) I'll see about making the animation smoother, by the way. I'm still learning.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:41, archived)
# feel free
to post the original picture ;)
(I helped save b3ta! rogan, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:08, archived)
# Thats quiet artsy, me likes very much,
but the anim would be less... Er... Headache-y if the animation was smother, insted of "FLASH! FLASH! FLASH!".
(techsmurf, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:36, archived)
# kinda
reminds me of the swirly colour thing you could do with that art package on the old amiga...
(I helped save b3ta! Tyronne Get To Falkirk, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:42, archived)
# .
Yeah, I'm using some really old software. All these effects are really simple tricks.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:47, archived)
# does anyone have a picture of that
downs syndrome guy that everyone was usin t'other day
(I helped save b3ta! EdibleVomit, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:33, archived)
# Him?
(I helped save b3ta! Kaiser, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:36, archived)
# close
but no
(I helped save b3ta! EdibleVomit, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:38, archived)
# hahahahahaha!
;)
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:55, archived)
# Right here.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:39, archived)
# Now you mention it
he does look like a bit of a drooler
(I helped save b3ta! mrbongo sweating like a formicophiliac on I'm a celebrity, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:44, archived)
# someone
help me please...
(I helped save b3ta! EdibleVomit, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:49, archived)
# Help?
Press F1.
(techsmurf, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:55, archived)
# arf!
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:55, archived)
# This was easy to make.

I just pressed the "Warholize kitten" button on my animation program.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:29, archived)
# Woo & Yay!
YOu have a talent for making Strobecats.
(techsmurf, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:32, archived)
# It really was easy to make.
I admit I had to press more than one button, but it's all a trick.
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:36, archived)
# That's Ace!
it is.
(I helped save b3ta! Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:32, archived)
[challenge entry] What Nostradamus really saw..............all this time he lied to us!

(I helped save b3ta! Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:22, archived)
# hehe
nice, took a minute. Is he all hopped up on glue or pixie sticks?
(I helped save b3ta! Allanon, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:24, archived)
# .

edit: not you personally, of course!
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:32, archived)
# Sadly
I know........
(I helped save b3ta! Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:34, archived)
# nooooo! not really!
all is well, and i see a great future stretching out in front of you. on thursday you will have great luck. you will have an idea soon which will change your life for the better. chocolate is your lucky food and pasta will bring an ill wind. beware of people with more than one i in their face, as they can count. a thorny problem can be solved with superglue
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:41, archived)
# Beans always bring
ill wind for me...
(techsmurf, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:44, archived)
#
(I helped save b3ta! bumblebee.. I am not a number! I am a free snail!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:16, archived)
# haha!
yes!
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:18, archived)
# wooooo
superelvisman!
(I helped save b3ta! Allanon, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:19, archived)
# he's filled his top
with boigers.
(I helped save b3ta! Jay, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:20, archived)
# wossa
boiger?
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:25, archived)
# think max from hart to hart...
"when these two met, it was moider."
(I helped save b3ta! Jay, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:28, archived)
# and they drank
supoib qwaffe
(I helped save b3ta! bananaman, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:29, archived)
# oi get ya
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:34, archived)
# woo yay etc
(I helped save b3ta! littlebean, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:45, archived)
# superb!
everything's great tonight!
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:56, archived)
# there's been a shortage of applicants lately
(I helped save b3ta! rogan, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:14, archived)
# woo you!
I'll join the dark side
(I helped save b3ta! mrbongo sweating like a formicophiliac on I'm a celebrity, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:24, archived)
# Vader really
needed to make that poster...
(I helped save b3ta! Kaiser, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:29, archived)
# Your lack of
resumé disturbs me
(The Flux Ox, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:31, archived)
# haha
(I helped save b3ta! rogan, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:41, archived)
# .
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:08, archived)
# Is that real?
.
(I helped save b3ta! Allanon, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:10, archived)
# you know your dentures, you do
well done!
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:17, archived)
# scarey fucker
i'm spooked now.

woo
(Mattyboy, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:11, archived)
# is that scary?
i thought it looked quite cheerful
(I helped save b3ta! spacefish bong!, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:17, archived)
# well i'm scared
and i'm rock hard me.
;)
(Mattyboy, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:25, archived)
# looks like he should be saying
'aha!'
(I helped save b3ta! the triple legendary unicorn, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 21:05, archived)
# happy chap!
looks like he should be doing jazz hands
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:57, archived)
# Okay, so he took ONE hit of acid, back in 1968

And he's still having flashbacks?
(I helped save b3ta! Bob Scene, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:01, archived)
# yay!
I love trans-dimensional cats, the best sort
(I helped save b3ta! munkt0n, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:03, archived)
# woo!
the only sort.
(I helped save b3ta! bananaman, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:14, archived)
# ha ha ha
ha
(Mattyboy, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:07, archived)
# W/Y/H
to the strobe-cat.
(techsmurf, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 20:09, archived)
# Hooray! I have a website! Woo!

Clicky! Woo!
(I helped save b3ta! EvS, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 19:48, archived)
# Wow...
That's from inside my head this morning...
(what will there be on the site?)
(I helped save b3ta! Kaiser, Tue 8 Oct 2002, 19:51, archived)

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