Bullied became a bully
I used to get bullied all the time. Even by geeks from the computer club. I (for some reason I forget now) had always promised myself never to hit someone. I'd just leg it, hide or sometimes just take it. One day the fattist, ugliest cunt in the year started on me again.

It was really quite odd. I could see my arms
punching him madly in the face then his head being smashed against the classroom door. But all the time I felt strangely serene and calm. Until afterwards when I went all shakey.

After that I must have liked the feeling and got into lots of fights, kicking the shit out of a few of the kids that had bullied me.

Shame you can't settle things the same way at work. My boss is a jumped-up little midget bastard control freak. A good kicking would do him some good. It would be like providing a service wouldn't it? huh?
( kirkbear2, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:26, Reply)

I went to a naughty school in gravesend
after getting thrown out of grammar, there were fights at grammar but nothing would prepare me for the fights at my new school

because only girls fought at my new school

every thursday or friday in the car park behind the netball court two of our chavilicious bulldogs wouls await another to storm onto the arena amongst cheers and heckling and they would then proceed to explode together in a flurry of scratching, swearing, screaming, hairspray and shoes, to be eventually broken upo by either a VERY brave female teacher or a policeman, usually the latter

sugar, spice and all things nice these girls were not composed of, the boys just didnt seem to fight at this school, they probably felt emascualted as i can assure you all us male viewers did, but WHAT A SHOW!

after going to grammar the idea of mixed school really excited me, but i´ll tell you this was the holy biscuit

god it turned me on
( SickRik float like a camembert sting like a brie, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:19, Reply)

Indestructible.
A lad at my high school, who was a good 2 or 3 years older than me (let's call him Simmo) took an unusually big disliking to me. It was odd because a lot of the other lads in that year I got on with ok, not mixing with my own year all that well.
Anyway - months of taunting from him and occasionally slapping me round the head just pissed me off - even though some of the other lads did point out that 'he's done nothing to you - leave it.'
He eventually challenged me to the dreaded "Outside school, end of the day."

I figured this was the only way to settle things and when one of my own year asked me "You going to fight simmo?" I replied with a "Yes. He's a poof anyway."

This bold statement on my part caused an upswell of interest - to which a large crowd gathered - including simmos sister who was my age.

His face was bright red when he saw me, having clearly been taunted by all for picking on a younger lad who in turn had no fear of him. He wanted to instill fear in me - that was the way it worked.

He walked right up to me and punched the side of my head. I blinked, licked my lips and said
"Nah - you're still a fucking poof."

this enraged him even more, causing everyone to be overawed by his attempts to pummel me.

He knocked me to the floor with a fair blow to the forehead. I shook my head, stood up:-
"Fuck me Simmo, can't your sister fight me instead?"
This caused everyone to burst out laughing and he kicked me squarely in the nuts.
Wanker.
That hurt.
( Razor What the fuck - a sig?, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:16, Reply)

yum..
not really a fight but i remember having to sit on the naughty chair when i was in nursery for biting a boys ear

that will teach him for trying to kiss me

bastard
(lola_fish, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:15, Reply)

Who nose?
Fights were aplenty in my school, some racially motivated, some between teachers, some over girls and lots of petty disputes like during a game of wallies.

'My pound coin was nearer the wall than yours, I won, you gay bastard!'

Ah the good old days; The best fights were between the fifth years or sixth formers - when you're a little 12 year old new to Big School they seemed like proper manly roll your sleeves up fisticuffs kind of affairs.

I was a little bastard at school, I'll admit it. There were four of us in our gang, in all the same lessons, all mad keen on football. We all had a laugh together, but one lad had a clear dislike of me. To be honest I didnt like him that much either. We were always poking fun at each others mums and taking the piss generally. Sometimes it would get tense but never amounted to anything other than handbags at dawn.*

One day I found out my nemesis had spread a rumour that I had only got one testicle. Oh yes, very witty, but I was gutted when some of the fittest girls in the year came up and asked me my sum chuddy total.(was and still is 3). After that, things got serious.

One lovely lunchtime we were all playing football and he kept carrying out snidey little fouls on me and challenging me. Then after a foul that knocked me over the red mist swallowed me up. I flipped and hit him in the face three times, the third of which seemed to go *squish*. I hadnt aimed any punches, I was on complete automatic, mind full of rage. I steeled myself for the comeback - it didnt happen. The crowd dispersed, I was caught by a teacher (you cant help looking guilty after a fight) and suspended for two days...

I came back from suspension to find out i had broken his nose. Sinus trouble seemed to be his middle name after that...

Apologies....

*she didnt mind though.
( prem1um is full of life, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:15, Reply)

Foghorn Leghorn and Bricks Bricks good for your Head.
There was a lad at our Junior School (who incidentally is a regular poster on here but ill let him make himself known)that used to get in a fight, or attacked by a passing bee or wasp make the loudest fucking 200ft Oil Tanker Horn Scream known to man. I hope he doesnt do it anymore, his missus must think he is a right cunt.

Another story, the school softie at same school was being picked on as usual, during our Thursday afternoon football match. Well this particulair afternoon was different he was close to breaking point, just then he snapped and lobbed half a brick right into said bullies head. Claret fucking everywhere im telling you.

And he got suspended. The bad bad cunt.
(hoogie Original Cunt Horse Author, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:14, Reply)

Not so much a fight as random spontaneous violence
I never did get into a proper fight but did surprise myself by lashing out at stuff that shouldn't bother me.

Example 1: Playing some obnoxious little, ADDesque turd at pool. Sadly I got soundly beaten, usually this wouldn't bother me but he was being a gloating git about it. So I took the executive decision to twat him over the head with the pool cue that I was holding. Luckily I didn't bother reversing my grip to get some more weight behind it, just caught him over the head with the brass tip (he still went down). One visit to the school nurse for him and a bit of a talking to for me.

Example 2: Idly skateboarding around one of the school rooms, I rolled up to a semi-friend of mine who put his foot on the front of my board and shoved hard. The effect was to throw me off the board into an arm-waving stumble that nearly dumped me on my face. Briefly seeing red I again made a very well thought through decision to finish my stumbling with a full-blooded uppercut to his solar-plexus. Some crying for him and excessive guilt for me.

In fact I'm amazed by how dangerous some kids were. I once saw a fight in the changing rooms that escalated into one lad taking a full swing at another lad's head with a hockey stick. Luckily it was semi-effectively blocked. Having said that I went to a school full of elitist tossers who could probably have done with a bit more violence in their lives.
(flimflam_machine, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:13, Reply)

My brother (white) was getting lip from another lad in his year (black)
so I offered to have a word, group of mates went over and intimidated him verbally, along the lines of 'stay away'.

Get hauled up before the head of year for being racially abusive (WTF?)

The little shit had turned around everything I said, and invented his own version of events, even though I had 5 or 6 witnesses testifying I had said nothing racial.

I then got MASSIVE racial abuse off his sister for being white. Would the school do anything about that? Would they fuck. double standards i tell thee.

No violence ensued, but misery in class as I can't hit a girl, and if I say *anything* back I'll be in deeper shit.

I lamped the lying little shit a few months later for a late tackle during a football match. The shit.
( Moonraker isn't the droid you were looking for, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:12, Reply)

It could have been a lot worse
When I was about 14...

One of the "hard lads" at school decided he didn't like me because his mate didn't like me.

He stopped me in the street, with his gang of tattooed fucktard mates and told me he wanted a fight.

I told him I didn't want to, I knew I been beaten to a pulp. Called me a shit, punched me in the side of the head and walked off.

I got away lightly. He stabbed someone I knew to death six months later.
(Yellow Car is now red, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 12:05, Reply)

p4wned
I certainly wouldn't describe myself as a bully, I normally sorted other peoples bullying issues out, but there was one kid at our school, let's call him William, cos that was his name, who was frankly weird as fuck and was often (continually) on the receiving end of a lot abuse.

You knw that old adage grown-ups give to bullied kids?: 'just hit them back and they won't bother you again'? He chose me to try his theory on and, wouldn't you know it, caught be totaly off balance and sent me sprawling in spectacular fashion with the weakest-wrist punch evr. Me: laughing stock Him: Gained a modicum of respect from his peers, so in the end, Im pleased it worked out that way.
(kidcamel is due to call your mum at, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:59, Reply)

I won my first fight in playschool
According to my parents:

Some other kid stole my plasticine, so in true WWF style I clobbered him over the head with a plastic wheelbarrow.
(Minty Hit, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:58, Reply)

not me a friend of mine
he was my best mate form primary school and we gotr on well, he was a big lad, living on a farm and subsequently very strong. He did carry alot of weight and that meant younger gobby pupils would give him jip, he just ignored it mostly. However one day a particularly obnoxious little shit, who had 'older brothers and sisters to defend him' he was a cocky little shit and no-one retaliated for fear of his brothers and sisters who were alot older. Anyhoo, come one breaktime me and said friend are about to leave the toilets when aforementioned gob-shite and his minions barges in pushing my mate out the way, 'OI' my mate quite rightly replies, to which el gobshite launches a full range all effort right hook onto my mates chin, WHACK!!! nowt, happened my mate stood there, it didnt touch him, it was then the gobshite had that' oh shit' look in his eyes. My up till now gentle friend then proceeded to beat the absolute shit out of this lad and three of his friends, putting two of them in the pissy overflowing urinals. And the best thing of all, he seemed to manage to do it with only one hand whilst the other held his bag. I would have held it for him, but i now fear he might have actually killed them. after said beating he smiled as we walked away pleased in knowledge that shit-bag aint gonna be annoying us again. His older sister tracked me and my mate down later and actually thanked us, she said he was a cocky little fuck who needed taking down a peg or two. PS My mate is still hard as fuck, just fatter!!
(lankynyack, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:51, Reply)

Boy Band Battle
I'm too much of a wimp to get into fights myself. However, I do vividly remember the day that two of my friends had a fight during break time (just before Biology in case you're interested) - lots of pulling of hair, scratching of faces, gnashing of teeth and kicking of shins. The reason for the fight? They were arguing over the relative musical and aesthetic merits of Take That and East 17. If I remember correctly the East 17 representative won.
My friends were so cool.
(tallulah kittiwake, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:50, Reply)

Legendary? More like Leg-End-Dairy.
I got a black eye off a girl when I was about seven. It was most embarassing. We were playing hop scotch or something and we bumped into each other. She just lamped me. I couldn't hit her back as we all know that blokes can't hit girls. So I had to go home with a note to my parents saying why I had a black eye. My very hard and well respected older brother wanted me to regain my pride so dragged me out of the house and forced me to start a fight with an older kid I was friends with. He beat the crap out of me aswell. And I think it was then that my brother realised that the family name was very shakily balanced on my shoulders. :)

Still, all's well that ends well. I grew into a big bugger and when pushed in secondary school I soon lost it and showed people why you really shouldn't wind people who are bigger than you up. I wasn't a bully, infact far from it, I just don't take much crap off people.

One of my fondest memories of school was during GCSE's. My best mate was a lad called Lamby, we were both into grunge at the time. I was just t-shirt wearer but lamby went the whole hog with the hair etc. The trendies took offence to this so he used to get pushed around a bit. Which was out of order as Lamby wouldn't hurt a fly. It was after the last exam though that they decided to take things further since there'd be little the school could do. I was hanging around in a class with a teacher I played rugby with when a lad crashed in shouting 'sir, sir, x,y, and z* have got lamby in the sports hall and are battering him'. He legged it out of the door but knowing my friendship with Lamby he locked me in the class room. The swine! :) So I climbed out of the window and legged it there myself. My young legs and the window exit giving me a short cut made sure I got there first. And I beat the living crap out of all of them. I even gave a few people who should have known better who were in the baying crowd a slap aswell.
It was a top day. Exams were over, school was over, and small minded, small town idiots had got what they deserved.
Lamby and I lost touch soon after as you tend to do once school finishes.

*And I can't remember for the life of me what their names were.
( Evil Bastardo, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:47, Reply)

My Brother
Occasionally posts on here so I thought I get this one in before he does.

My bro was in the army and this meant that he regularly had to uproot his kids and move them to his new posting. On one move, Barry his eldest came up to him for a talk. Barry was worried about starting at a new school the next day as he thought he might get beaten up for being the new kid. So Steve put him right.

"What you've got to do, Number 1 son, is to find out who the *2nd* hardest kid in your year is. Don't go for the hardest - he'd probably murder you - but find the 2nd hardest and try and give him a good kicking. Even if you lose people will leave you alone after that"

So armed with this knowledge (and remember this was the guy who told me as a kid that to stop a dog attacking you you should ram you hand down it's thought and grab it's tongue..) Barry went confidently off to school.

About three hours later Steve got a call. From the headmaster who demanded his immediate attendance at Barry's school. So Steve shot off there and was ushered into the headmasters office where he was given the biggest dressing down he'd ever had in his life. 35 year old and been bollocked by a headmaster!

Turned out that Barry had found out who the second hardest in the school was. Tracked him down and brained him without warning with a half-brick. When he was dragged off and taken to see the headmaster he was asked why he'd attacked somebody without warning on his first day.

"My Dad told me to do it......."

Cheers
( Legless Mister Stabby - shanks for the memory, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:36, Reply)

DingDing
It's so long since I was at school I can't remember them. I was once attacked by a schoolboy when I was a bus driver so it's nearly on-topic.

He and his mate couldn't be arsed to get up in time to let me know they wanted to get off so I took them past their stop. The boy hero gave me a load of lip then swung one at me; so slowly that I was able to grab his arm and pull him towards me. After I'd scraped his face back and forth across the top of my - very hard knobbly plastic - change machine several times and bounced his head off the windscreen we'd arrived at the next stop and they got off. They didn't say thanks for the good manners lesson or anything! I stopped the service for the night, called the fuzz then went home to bed. Because I was a victim of a crime I got paid my full shift; result!

Mind you, these days he'd get counselling and I'd get banged up.
(The Jannie, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:33, Reply)

Hollywood/Bollywood
I went to boarding school. Not lardy-da boarding school, it was a state school with a boarding house which had a lot of kids whose parents were in "the forces".

Anyway, joining in the second year didn't help things greatly and the fact that being taller than most people stood me out as a challenge.

In some kind of weird Street fighter-esque competition I had to fight the other kids in my dorm to see where I fell in the hardness pecking order.

Well not even going to start glamorising fighting as invariably people think that it will be some Hollywood style punch up before scrabbling on the floor with a bloody nose.

However, I had got myself up "the ranks" and now had to fight an Indian kid who was considerably smaller than I was but second-hardest out of the fifteen or so of us. All was set up, ensuing baying crowd, us circling one another - but we didn't fight. There was no point and we had nothing but a stupid "who's hardest" thing to fight about. None of the "weaker" mob were going to start a fight with us individually, and the "hardest kid" wouldn't start on us both at once.

We are still friends fifteen years on.

Don't get me wrong, there are times when people push you to a point where it is better to do something, but don't let anyone force you into fighting for the sake of it.
( @><|= w0nu!) or cunt to my friends, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:24, Reply)

racist?
I only had one fight at school. I went to one of those schools where half the kids are white and half are asian. Meaning fights aplenty...

One of the asian girls who was renowned for getting us 'whiteys' in trouble for being racist came up to me at playtime (Wish we had playtime at work... ) and without a word punched me in the face. WTF?! I promptly took a swing back and asked her what the badgery-fuck that was about. Back came the reply "You don't like me because I'm black". What was my response? The mature, sensible thing of ignore her? Noooooooo

My response was to spit in her face and say in a psychotic manner "i.. don't ... LIKE... you.. because... you're... a... CUNT"

Yep. That told her.

Until her and about ten of her mates humillated me a few days later with a royal kicking and hung me by my rucksack on a water pipe and left me there. :o( The shame.
(The Apeface Cherub is not a cunty-uber-cunt, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:21, Reply)

two in one day
i was always a bit of a brawler in high school, and gave now legendary performance when i was about 14.

the eternal trigger "it was over the post!" argument during a game of (jumpers for goalposts) football soon escalated into what was dubbed by the watching prefects as "fight of the century", between me and my now best friend john (it happened years ago). being in a particularly sheltered area of our school playing fields the scrap went on for quite a while, until one final crushing left uppercut brought john to tears - the universally accepted equivalent to a TKO - the fact that i myself was covered in blood mattered not.

anyway, riding high on a sea of adreneline i bombed it straight to the sports hall (followed by the baying mob), where a fat kid called simon who'd stuck his boot in during the original fight had run to tell the teacher (and possibly hide). having cornered him on the basketball court i set about pummelling him, but having already punched myself out and bleeding from a smashed up nose and split eyebrow i soon succumbed to his weighty blows.

thus ended my short stint as "cock of the school", winning the St James "fight of the century" only to be beaten up by the fat geeky kid in the sports hall minutes later.
(idioteque., Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:18, Reply)

I was a late starter ... in more ways than one
I was at Oxford Poly (I am all of teh old now) and out on a 'date' with a prospective girlfriend. On the way walking her home, we passed some local townies on Magdelene Bridge. One of them said something terribly rude about my date, I said something equally rude back then he knocked me out. I had 3 stitches that night and lost my virginity at 3am the next morning. I think I won that fight on points.
(Freegan Bikefascist, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:17, Reply)

stabbing and fire
best one was when this kid about 2 years younger than me was gagging for a fight, you know the type. the kid who is in "that family", anyway i wouldnt fight him because of the age difference etc and one day on the way from school he stabbed me in the back with a fishing type knife.

luckily this only went into my back a centimetre or two so there was no life threatening damage, just a big hole.. that was it.. forget the two year gap this bastard has just stabbed me!

i was 16 at the time and hadnt really fought since primary school so i really didnt know my own strength, i punched him once square in the face which i was later told broke his nose, once in the chin which again, i was later told knocked out 2 teeth, then when he fell on the floor i kicked him, which i was later told cut his ear.

one of the family then tipped petrol over me one day and threatened to set me on fire.

nice family those guys were.
(pickefoo, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:12, Reply)

standing out from the crowd is a bad thing
when you move from Australia to a small northern (UK) town when you're 13.

I was in a *lot* of fights. Mainly just getting beaten up by kids older and bigger than me.

Thinking about it, I really did get beaten up quite a bit. My nose still doesnt look quite right.

Most of those kids are now either in the Army, getting shot at in Iraq, or on the dole, still in that little northern town. I run my own record label, have a beautiful girl who's in love with me, and get paid to play my music all over Europe. So fuck you, losers.

I make no apologies for my length & girth, its genetic.
(Mildred is a slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:11, Reply)

I've only ever been in one fight at school
and I'm not proud of it. I always kept quiet and out of the usual scraps that went on, but eventually got sucker punched to the side of the head by the year retard meathead, only to be told that I was a 'fucking loser' (I used to have long hair and and made the mistake of wearing a Lawnmower Deth T-Shirt on a non uniform day). I went absolutely mental, full red misty and everything. When they pulled me off him his eyes had closed up, teeth broken, bruises everywhere. I'd hit him so hard I had 3 broken fingers. Got left alone after that, he even offered me a cigarette when we were waiting outside the headmasters office a week later.
( The Beast can't help looking at womens breasts on the tube, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:11, Reply)

Witnessed some pure class
Mate of mine, Kev, was being hassled by some guys 2 years below us at school.

All the usual tripping in the corridor, name calling, etc went on. However it all came to a head one day, when between classes my mate was going down one of the tight narrow stair cases when the main protagonist was coming up.

This twat decided to push Kevin on the way past, then leer over the open balustrade at him. So Kev reaches out grabs the guys tie through the handrail and pulls down hard. Cue twats face and highly polished woodowork meeting at speed, with force.

No more trouble
( Fire & Forget it's the only way to be sure, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:09, Reply)

Aaah the playground
I grew up in Edinburgh, then moved down south and ended up at a school in a class full of soft handed flossers.

Our year, and the year below would play football on the same pitch at the same time in lunch breaks. I was in goal for one game and the headmaster's son (my nextdoor neighbour) was keeping the same goal for the different game. Naturally we'd get in each others way a bit, but due to the tense nature of the game the year below were having this was more of an issue than normal. It all got a bit pushy in goal and the headmaster's son got wound up to the point that he hit me in the mouth. I saw red and went for him, he knew he was going to get a battering so legged it. Determined as I was to catch him and drag him round the playground by his legs scraping his face on the tarmac, we got grabbed by a dinner lady and marched to the headmaster's office.

The headmaster asked what happened, so I told him, he asked his son, who, fair play to him, told it as it was. I got excused, and could hear the bollocking the headmaster dished out all the way down the corridor to my classroom.

I guess being connected pays, but being too conected gets you in more shit than it's worth.
(ralphseviltwin, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:07, Reply)

Enough of my school yard whining.....
Yeah I have been involved in several fights.

Decided to blow kisses at the biggest skin head at school when he called me a "poof".

Thing is, although he just came up and nutted me and I staggered back he then went to put the boot in, my Ninja like reflexes went in to action and I caught his boot at the ankle and lifted his leg beyond his waist then......

let go.

*BANG!* he hit me again, probably to teach me a lesson for being stupid.
( Fire & Forget it's the only way to be sure, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 11:01, Reply)

Stalemate
The only truly epic fight I ever had was like the Secondry School version of the “The Quiet Man”.

It started just outside the front entrance to my School for some stupid reason, lasted a good 5 - 6 minutes, had an audience of at least a hundred, and ended about 200 yards away in a ditch full of mud!

We swung, jabbed and kicked our way to total exhaustion until we both stood up panting and facing each other like two titanic heavyweight boxers...

“Your Dead!!!! I’m going to get my brother onto you!” My opponent declared

“Yeah come on then!!” I retorted in defiance.

We turned, both bleeding and covered head to tow in mud and went home.

Bit of an anticlimax really.
(Minty Hit, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 10:55, Reply)

i used to beat up
all the people who beat me in line :'(

heh, only had one 'scrap'. basically some kid at collage always bullied me and another geeky chap - kicking us every time we walked past and generally being a cock. one day he was sat on a table and kicked me below the knee (really kaned) - i literally snapped - put my hand on his face and pushed his head onto the desk. then bashed his head up and down onto the desk, pretty hard. all his 'mates' just blanked him, ignoring his pleas of help.. he left collage the next day, crashed his car that week, and was dumped by his gf for a 13 year old (she was only 14). rocks!
(5lab, Fri 10 Mar 2006, 10:52, Reply)

I had my head kicked in
because of my little brother. There were two other brothers in my school, Carl and Neil, and Neil kept picking on me. Until I hit him with a chair, then chased him into the playground and gave him a good hiding. Unfortunately, as retribution, his older brother attacked my younger brother walking home from school the next day.

Being the hero I undoubtedly am, I went after him and got battered good and proper. Big swollen eye, hurt fingers etc etc.

Happily, however, I and my friends later caught him alone in the park and rubbed his face in dogshit.

The ginger bastard. That taught him.
( disasterprone "Pyjamas caused the Holocaust", Fri 10 Mar 2006, 10:52, Reply)