Magpie
As my husband reminded me, I collect all sorts of uesless crap, such as:

*Bizarre religious paraphernalia like Chick tracts, recordings of sermons and Virgin Mary icons, despite being a complete nonbeliever.

*Vintage film equipment, specifically Bell and Howell. Cameras, lens attatchments, projectors, editing machines, films, the lot. I've begun selling them off, though.

*First editions of children's books, though I have no offspring of my own.

*Random autographs; I have Beck, Stephin Merrit, Deb Googe(gorgeous eyes), Kath Gifford, Alec Empire, Tommy Lee and all of Kitchens of Distinction, along with others.

*Odd records, the weirder the better. This includes children's songs in Japanese, Ping-Pong Percussion, Czech folk songs, Chinese opera, sound effects of everyday items and recordings of heart murmurs intended for the education of medical students, plus a few hundred more.

*Teacups, saucers and cream and sugar sets, no particular pattern.

*Antique and vintage buttons. I have thousands of them.

*Harry Potter-related merchandise, but only the illustrated pieces, not the ones with the actors on them.

*Vintage pornography. I have a John Holmes 8mm film and yes, it's all true. Also, few things are quite as unintentionally hilarious as gay porn from the 1970s.

Reading over this, I'm a bit impressed that there's actually enough space in our house for us among all my things!
(louveciennes , Volvospotter, Sat 13 Jan 2007, 0:34, Reply)

I collect my knob cheese in a jar...
...and have done since the age of 12. I've now almost filled a jam jar full of my smegmary goodness, and am due to start on a pasta jar sometime in the summer

This story is of course not true, however was once told at great length and with extraordinary detail by one of my friends at a house party I was due to attend, and with further corroboration from some of my other friends was eventually believed by the entire house. Sort of makes you think about what other people think about you when they're ready to believe something like that.
( Furness, Sat 13 Jan 2007, 0:28, Reply)

Um
I have fairly average DVD and CD collections if it's quantity you're after. Much of it is compeletely normal and possibly even tasteful - world cinema (e.g. 'Italian for Beginners'), lots of good comedy (e.g. 'Black Books'), some cosy dramas (yay 'Doc Martin'), decent recent albums (The Feeling, Captain, David Gray).

But look closely and see my twin obsessions..... Garth Brooks and 'Doctor Who'.

My bestest Christmas present this year was a talking TARDIS money box.

Hang on a sec whilst I check something...
Yep. I'm still single.
(cisco, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 23:49, Reply)

I don't Collect them, i Just can't throw them away...
I have a lot of (low end) specific equipment. This means if I want them to work together I have to use lots of cables.
Like most people I (used to) have a large box or drawer into which I would shove all and any cables into it. It didn't matter if they were coiled, or even individually vacuum packed, because you only had to close your eyes for the time it takes a Chav to purchase a Burberry hat before they become one homogonous lump of frustration. You know how you Gran used to love disentangling wool and stuff? That’s because she was insane, if she hadn't have done that she would have been the next Hitler.

There's no way I’m going to end up with a bobble hat, breasts that warm my knees and a compulsive tendency to invade Poland because a few cables. So, sacrificing a wardrobe given over to bobble hats; I used the clothes rails to hang cables.



They are in order of function. For example, top right you've got mobile phone cables and Ethernet data cables (organised by Cat5, Cat5e and Cat6), bottom right are printer, serial and parallel cables). Top left are power cords, organised by socket terminator (IDC, Figure8 and Compaqfuckinganoyyinglywierdlaptoppowersupply) and then subcategorised into US, UK and Australian Mains plugs.

What me? Anal? naaaaaaaa
( KittyWaste lives at Sleepingplanet.com, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 23:49, Reply)

Cuddly toys.
I mus have hundreds of the damned things. Everything from cats, dogs, 'normal' bears, to a sheep complete with interchangable clothing and a bear half as big as I am (names Henry, infact). It's silly, and I really should stop as I'm running out of room, but hey, nevermind.

Got a thing about dragons, aswell. I only have a few sofar, including two tops, 4 or 5 figures and a wooden model I made from a kit. Love dragons, me =)

Me and my mate are working on the My Little Pony army, and we are planning to take over the world. We only have 5 so far =) Some army.

I'm a fan of CDs, aswell, but since the age of mp3 dawned i haven't bought anywhere near so many. 30 on display, and probably around the same amount that I don't display (out of self-respect). Pathetic, I know, but when you class that our house is home to ALOT of CDs...

My mum collects badges. They're not on display at the moment but she's got hundreds of them. Been collecting them all her life. Nutter.

*girth joke*
(Steg isn't drunk enough yet., Fri 12 Jan 2007, 23:25, Reply)

Mental images...
...of women in nice lacy hot pink ‘Brazilian’ knickers that show their asses off!
(Guinness2702 Meh! Do I look like I care?, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 23:20, Reply)

t-shirts. i've got hundreds of odd and great ones
appropriate, but utterly unfunny. sorry
( monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 22:55, Reply)

Knickers, panties, call them what you will…
I have far too many pairs….

Lacy ones in white, black, hot pink, purple, turquoise….

Simple cotton ones with spots, stripes, days of the week, rude remarks, flowers, cartoons…

Satin ones with polka dots….

See-through ones in black and white….

Sexy ones with cute ties and bows at the side…..

Ones that lurk at the bottom of the draw that are uncomfortable or only for ‘bedroom’ use….

Huge Bridget Jones ones, M & S Magic knickers with so much lycra that they hurt to wear them….

And the best ones? A nice lacy hot pink pair of ‘Brazilian’ knickers that show my ass off!

.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 22:33, Reply)

Cars. I collect cars.
More specifically, old Citroëns. I don't have a full set because my gf would kill me. I have had, however, in alphabetical order, an AX, a BX (briefly before it was stolen from my workshop and vandalised), two CXes (still got one), a Dyane, two GSAs (still got one of those, too) and about four or five XMs. I haven't had (but would like to get) a 2CV (any variant, although some would argue you need one of each), an Ami. a DS, a GS (different to a GSA, slightly), an H-van, an ID and *maybe* a ZX (but only a Volcane, in black).
Apologies for the green oily stains on the driveway...
(gordonjcp, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 22:01, Reply)

Cacti
I collect and grow Cacti.

and I really like it actully.

mmm, nice normal teenager, that's me!
( Lizzy_Bee is a mac user now, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 21:35, Reply)

Well not so much a collection,
as a quest, to find the worst MySpace and MySpace rip off, sites.
This one takes the cake however.
www.summertweed.piczo.com
It's got to be fake (most the guestbook signings definitely are). If its not I've lost all faith in humanity.
( Paedosmile service with a grin., Fri 12 Jan 2007, 21:22, Reply)

I collect tickets from display cabinet labelling conventions
...and they're all nicely recorded in my database of tickets from display cabinet labelling conventions.

Meh! Do I look like I care?
(Guinness2702 Meh! Do I look like I care?, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 21:14, Reply)

I have a collection...
Of well kept pubic hairs.
They are displayed on and around my collectors edition penis.
(Good Looking Deity Grew a magnificent beard on, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 21:03, Reply)

i collect receipts, then fail to do my tax return and end up with plastic bags around the flat stuffed with them
does that count?

on a slightly, but not much more, serious note, i collect the stubs of every bad movie i go to, stick them to a sheet of A4, then have a good rant about how crap it was, before filing it away in my 'ideas' folder. i suppose i like the irony. or possibly am just a bit bipolar.
(niceandwarmandhot vive la résistance, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 20:51, Reply)

I have a few collections.
China figurines, special 50ps and paperclips.

Not sure why. I've collected the china since I was 7 or so.

I know I could just BUY the paperclips, but that defeats the whole objective of collecting them.

I don't have many, but I keep them by the computer.


( Rev. Cleo still alive, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 20:37, Reply)

i collect semen
with my mouth yummy
(branflakes, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 20:25, Reply)

I've started collecting
Sailor Moon merchandise. And the Animal Crossing figurines.

It's not very interesting.

Though I have been to the London Expo, and am going again in May.

I went as a catgirl. And next time I'm dressing up as a cat from Sailor Moon.

Enough said.
( Bats, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 20:20, Reply)

Books.
Faasands of 'em. Perfectly organised by author (fiction pbs) or subject/size (everything else), though the rest of the house is a shitpit. Oh, and tarot decks. Not because I believe in any of that psychic arse though, I just like the designs.

And the weird and embarrassing one - cat's whiskers. Yes, when I spot a whisker on the floor I pick it up and put it with the rest (in a shot glass on the shelf). I must have at least 100, which from 2 cats is, let's face it, pretty... impressive, is that the word?
(littlesunshine licked your blinky diodes on, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 20:08, Reply)

Numismatist
Mr Workboresme is a numismatist, he collects old coins. He will tell anyone who asks about his vast collection of Morgan Dollars, and also anyone who doesn't ask.
He has the ability to wax lyrical about his coins forever, and even showed all of them and explained their ratings to our 4 year old nephew.

Thank god he has some redeeming qualities, 'cos otherwise he's a right boring old fart.
( Batshitmentalist is sane for once, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 19:59, Reply)

Radioactive Rocks
I once took a tour of Trinity Site, the location in New Mexico, USA, where the first atom bomb was detonated. After the blast, the whole ground surface was covered with a patina of Trinitite, a greenish glass made from the molten local sand. The greenish glass has long been shattered by military vehicles, however, and mixed into the sand.

The military authorities announced: "under no circumstances should you pick up the Trinitite," since the rocks are still radioactive. But I couldn't just ignore the Trinitite, because what were the odds of ever returning? But I didn't want to put them in my pockets, right next to my tender gonads. So I picked up pieces of Trinitite and slipped them into my socks. The pebbles rolled under my sole and thenceforth I hobbled around in great pain.

Then I noticed that EVERYONE was picking up the Trinitite rocks, military folks too, and putting them in their pockets. So I retrieved the pebbles and put them in my pockets too. It's remarkable how quickly one can get comfortable with the idea of inflicting genetic damage on untold future generations, in order to avoid minor foot pain.

Using a Geiger counter, we were later able to compare the radioactivity of the Trinitite with naturally-occurring Columbite ore collected from a mine in northern NM. The natural stuff was much more radioactive than the Trinitite! So, the miners have more to fear than the soldiers!

I need to expand this collection of rocks. I wonder how easy it is to smuggle them through airports these days?
(Perv With A Dog had his eyes pecked out by scrub jays on, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 19:46, Reply)

I'm collecting tickets/wristbands/etc. from gigs I go to.
I have ones from RHCP, Placebo, and the BBC Proms.

Not very interesting, but I haven't been to many gigs yet.

This is a serious answer, and therefore will not get onto the 'Best' page. So imagine that there's a silly, hilarious answer contained within this same post.
( ArthurTheRat, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 19:46, Reply)

beer mats
my brother collects beer mats. I have no idea why, but he used to sort out all his pocket money into towers of coins on his desk too. Towers of 2's and 1's....

Nutter
(mr-lizard Hell's teeth man!, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 19:36, Reply)

Collections eh?
Upon mustering the energy to turn away from my monitor, it appears as though I am collecting Pizza boxes. This is due to my unrelenting laziness and outright refusal to cook anything for myself, added to my insistence that cardboard is biodegradable and will therefore eventually clean itself up.
( Furness, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 19:17, Reply)

Collectable geek
I thought I was bad - books, ornaments, cuddly toys. Boxes and boxes of everything that I've collected and have never thrown away have moved house with me quite a bit over the last few years.

And then I met my boyfriend, the owner of 5000 cds, a couple of cabinets of Land Rover models, filing drawers full of brochures, boxes of Robot Wars toys (ok, that one's got a reason as he did build a competing robot) - the list probably goes on. He buys clothes so he doesn't have to wash them so often. Calling him a geek just gets shrugged off - he knows he is. One day he said to me "I think I might be a bit obsessive." I looked around me and rolled my eyes.

We've just moved house and yes, the new one's much bigger just so we can fit ourselves and our stuff in it. I despair...
( Bozo the Clone will work for chocolate., Fri 12 Jan 2007, 19:12, Reply)

I collect Lego... and build quite a bit, too.
Gaze in wonder at my Sandcrawler:
www.bloggerheads.com/images/lego_sandcrawler.jpg

I also collect jokes about penguins... but only after a few pints.
( Manic can teach you the secret of fire, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 18:29, Reply)

I used to have a brick collection.
For some inexplicable reason, I collected a brick on the way home.

I then promptly had my ankle broken. To make up for it, my housemates started bringing me back a brick every time they went out drinking, to make up for the nights I couldn't come along.

I was with them the night they tried to steal a paving slab from the square in Bournemouth.

That may have been going a little far. Especially when they broke it.

In hindsight, trying to take one of the huge green hanging plant stands may have been going too far. Especially as all three of us were dressed as Mexicans at the time.

Yes, we'd dressed up especially for it.

It landed on my head.
( gone, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 18:25, Reply)

I have collected . . .
Various things over the years, but have never had a complete collection, these include . . .

2-6 yrs - Lego
5-8 yrs - He Man/Transformers/Airfix/Badges
8-10 yrs - Panini Football Stickers
10-12 yrs - Parker Pens
12-16 yrs - Penknives/Zippos
16-20 yrs - Beer Bottles of the world
16-Present - All of Ian Flemings Bond books!

I have collected CD's and old Cinema stubs since I was about 13-14 yrs old.

I think hoarding is in the genes, every member of my family has their random collections, my Ma collects Magazines and Recipes, my Aunt collects Make Up, Shoes and Handbags, some date from the 1950's. In my experience it all stops once you have 'completed' your collection, to start a new one!

*edit* yeah, I kept the balls from ink catridges too, to this day, I don't understand why?!
( 42 Loves Teh Funphenschnaffles, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 17:29, Reply)

Liar
You just shit yourself most nights because of all the filthy women you've had!
(eurrrrrggggggghhhhhh Cunting /talk, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 16:19, Reply)

Various Women Stains...
On my bed sheets.
(Kid_Blunder, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 16:18, Reply)

When I was little
I collected dirty old stones, convinced they were precious jewels or something. I had them all categorised in a little wooden box.

I also collected the little balls out of fountain pens at school. And gel pens (but everyone did).

And a load of other things. It seems all the things I tried valiantly to create collections of just sort of stopped being a collection after a while.
(Marmite Omelette ...but I feel better having screamed, don't you?, Fri 12 Jan 2007, 16:14, Reply)