I think this here pea-roast was my first ever QOTW tale.
And it never actually happened, d'ya hear me?
IT DIDN'T HAPPEN.


thought long and hard before posting this...
because i'm still not sure how i feel about what i did...

and i apologise in advance for the length...

many moons ago, whilst betrothed to the 1st mrs blaireau (we eventually got divorced, i'm married again and totally happy with 2nd mrs blaireau and nearly 5 year old wee blaireau), she and i took it upon ouselves, whilst visiting her mother for christmas, to meet her estranged father (neil) and his whore (carol) for a "bridge building pint"...

what a fucking mistake that turned out to be!!!

leaving the pub in jolly mood we accepted their invite for a nightcap chez slapper. and things deteriorated rapidly from there...

once back in her own territory she turned feral and mental in equal measure, instigating a barney of large proportions which resulted in neil (a 40 year old hard-working, hard-drinking, hard-fighting brick shit-house of a farmer) using my body as a battering-ram on the back door. quite literally!

so we left. duh.

and as we slunk off down the road i silently vowed revenge. well not so silently actually. i screamed "i'm gonna get you, you psycho cunt".
and believe me, dear reader when i tell you that i did...

6 or so months later the future 1st mrs blaireau's mother had got her divorce through and we went to help her move out of the family home to make way for the happy couple to play at families, giving blaireau (a plumber and hero of this tale) the opportunity to exact his revenge.

a wee bit of house sabotage was NOT carried out, specifically...

1) a bag of bones and offal in the loft (courtesy of the workers at the slaughterhouse where i did my meat-inspection training when i was a student eho years ago).

2) took all the lightbulbs into the garage and smashed them against the inside of the door. also took all of the fuses out of all the appliances (including the alarm system).

3) pissed (6 times in total over 1 1/2 days) all over 3 or 4 boxes of business and personal papers.

4) loosened the electrical connections in the 2 electric showers. this would cause arcing and possibly fire!! or at least premature unit failure.

5) closed all the radiator valves so tightly that most of the spindles sheared off. none of these valves would ever be opened again. also removed the bleed-valve screws from all the rads. also sheared off the spindle of the mains stop-tap under the sink and the one in the street outside before filling the hole in the pavement with neat cement.

6) drained the hot water and central heating system before loosening all the check-nuts i could find, so when refilled a million leaks would magically appear.

7) removed screws from door hinges before carefully shutting the door. a wee present for the next person to open the door...

8) sprinkled salt inside the expensive recessed light fittings in the 2 bathrooms. salt is hydroscopic and ionic i.e. it draws water from the air leading to lots of corrosion.

9) took the washers out of all the taps.

10) super-glued all the locks (including the alarm system, again) (5 tubes!!)

and the one that clinched the deal...

11) pulled the sky dish cable through the wall about 4 inches, cut it with pliers and glued it all back in place with a nice blob of mastic, ensuring the cable ends were pushed hard up against each other so there was at least some signal, but not a whole lot.

as it turned out neil "bit the big one" a few months later, from a heart attack, whilst watchin tv.

from the day he moved back into the house he had apparently complained about the shitty reception. i'm sure there was a connection...

that fooking well tought him, aye???

length? more than he could handle, it would appear...

if you think i went too far then click "I like this"
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 12:21, 147 replies)

Gosh.
Where to begin...?
( splorp ®, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 12:38, closed)

At the beginning?
It was a long time ago and I'm not exactly proud of what I did...
That said, the bloke was an utter cunt.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 12:51, closed)

I suppose a psycho cunt...
...deserves an utterly psycho revenge.

I suppose.
(AgeingGeek Father of Two, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 12:55, closed)

Describing yourself as "plumber" and "hero"
Made me imagine you doing all this with a red hat and overalls, jumping with a vrrrp! noise and picking things up with a gling! noise.
( Photoshop Bitch 2014 edition, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 12:56, closed)

Hahahaha, I'd never thought of that
Thanks
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 13:58, closed)

Neil beat you up,
because Carol is mental?
( monster munch person, man, woman... camera... TV?, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 13:20, closed)

Was.
But yes, that was part of it.
He also was.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 13:58, closed)

2+2=5??

Hmm.
(skgorsky, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 13:46, closed)

Oh, god yes it was an over-reaction.
Hence how I felt about it afterwards, and still to this day. A little.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:06, closed)

so you were so upset about being beaten up
you caused potentially hundreds of pounds worth of damage, committed various acts of criminal vandalism and potentially endangered the life of another human being? All because you weren't man enough to let it go?

I'm not calling you a liar blaireau69, but you definitely don't seem like a well-adjusted person
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 13:46, closed)

It was probably thousands of pounds.
And no, I don't think you quite grasp it, but never mind.
To make a statement like that about me now, when the events happened about 14 years ago?
Are you the same person you were 14 years ago? Did you handle things as well then as you do now?
Have a think about that then shove your pompous, judgemental response up your fairy arse ;)
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:04, closed)

you can't be that different now, if you're still not sure how you feel about it

( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:13, closed)

Actually that line is from the original post, 4 1/2 years ago.
I think that when I wrote that what I meant was that I still had mixed feelings about it. A perfectly normal thing, I would say.
I am actually a very different person now. As I'm sure you are too. 14 years is a fair old time.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:19, closed)

I'm not drastically different to how I was four years ago
I'm not some kind of mental
( glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:22, closed)

No, of course you're not.
And it was 14 years ago, not 4.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:24, closed)

well, durr. you said yourself that line is from when you wrote the post, four years ago.
thicky.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:43, closed)

You just continue to play to your strengths, petal.

( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:47, closed)

what, like being able to understand the correct meaning of a sentence?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:55, closed)

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:04, closed)

hurry up...
I've been sat here for ages
(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:00, closed)

Nice.
You could have just hired a hitman.
( The Mock Turtle ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:05, closed)

LOL
;)
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:06, closed)

wow. you suck.

(Mortal Wombat - he's just an excitable boy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:11, closed)

It was a long time ago.
But I don't deny what I did.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:13, closed)

Good thing it didn't happen then.
Cause that would make you a cunt.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:14, closed)

Would have made me a cunt.
If you don't mind.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:20, closed)

Not really.
I'm happy with my original assertion.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:24, closed)

So you're saying that I'm a cunt now?
Over something that happened 14 years ago?
You cunt.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:27, closed)

Pretty much, yes.
I'm glad you think time is a factor here, especially as you seem quite proud of what you did.

Basically all you have done is say "it was 14 years ago" as if that makes it okay for you to act like a cunt and not show the least bit of contrition for your actions.

Classic cunt behaviour.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:31, closed)

Obviously time is a factor. I can't change what I did and it gave me cause to have a good look at myself.
Proud? No.
Cunt? No.
Personally evolved over the last decade and a half? Yes.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:35, closed)

Perhaps you should re-read your replies to others.
Or indeed the original post you came out with. You seem quite chuffed at yourself, you may not see it but that's how you come across.

I wasn't calling you a cunt for the hell of it.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:38, closed)

No, I think you've decided I'm a cunt and are interpreting my posts on that basis.

( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:42, closed)

Ahahaha you are such a tool
Admitting you did that, going 'LOL ;)' and then pissing and moaning when people call you out for being an utter fucking moron.

LOL
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:46, closed)

Not really.
I read your post with no pre-conception of who you are, not having interacted with you on b3ta in any way shape or form before.

Your story, your whole attitude in responding to others, has led me to believe you are a cunt. It also appears you didn't read my last reply properly either. You said that you're not proud of what you've done, I'm glad to hear that. I only pointed out that you gave no indication of that anywhere else.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:47, closed)

Recalling a cuntish thing 14 years ago and not thinking you're still a cunt = Cunt with added Moron

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:38, closed)

Recalling past cuntery and seeing the true distance between then and now=evolution.
Not realising that one series of actions 14 years ago don't define an entire person now=retarded.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:45, closed)

Less cuntery, more 'it happened ages ago so it's okay LOL ;)'
Boy oh boy are you special
LOL ;)
( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:48, closed)

I'd stop trying to provoke him if I were you
he might glue up your locks, ruin your heating and water system and attempt to electrocute you in the shower, because he's clearly not man enough to just walk away from a fight
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:38, closed)

oh, don't be silly. he wasn't trying to KILL anyone. everyone knows that messing with the electrics of a shower is just a harmless prank.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:44, closed)

Do you know much about showers?
Didn't think so.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:45, closed)

you said yourself that you could have caused a fire
that's pretty mental
(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:47, closed)

You're making Truthbert look good, that's a pretty impressive feat.
You might want to just let this be and move on from this thread.
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:06, closed)

But it's brightening an otherwise boring Friday afternoon.
Watching the mongs react in such a predictable fashion.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:10, closed)

OK.
*buys more popcorn*
*eats more popcorn*
*feels thirsty*
*Finishes large Fanta*
*Needs toilet*
*Goes to toilet*
*Misses middle of film*
*Gets confused*
*Asks friends what is going on*
*Gets told off for talking in film*
*Sulks in seat for last half hour*
*Doesn't enjoy the cinema at all*
( scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:23, closed)

Of course time is a factor. I did plenty of things in my youth that I'd not do today, including pulling the wings off insects and shitting myself in public.

In any event, anyone who resorts to physical violence following a verbal disagreement deserves some form of consequence - it's generally accepted that such behaviour may lead to some form of financial outlay/loss of liberty if dealt with by the courts. Potentially-fatally rigging the shower is quite possibly overkill, granted...
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:51, closed)

LOL!
U SHIT UR PANTS!!!!!!

LOSER!!!!!!!
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:21, closed)

Not that I recall - but I have it on good authority that I shat my nappy on many occasions, and there is photographic evidence (ie, a largish bulge) proving without any shadow of a doubt that I shat my swimming trunks on a moderately crowded beach.

You can't hold it against me though, it was three months ago.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:25, closed)

LOL!
UR IN2 SCAT PORN!!!!!!!!!!!

etc.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:30, closed)

oh come on
we've all come home from primary school at least once wearing the special knickers.

Haven't we?
( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:30, closed)

LOL!
U SHIT URSELF IN PUBLIC!!!!

LOSER!
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:32, closed)

this wouldn't be nearly so bad if you weren't the maths teacher.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:32, closed)

tru.

( Moon Girl Technologies horrendous beanbag, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:37, closed)

"This one time I did a massive rape. But it was over a month ago, so you can't hold it against me."
It's a classic watertight defence.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:17, closed)

This is how prison works
The judge looks at the crime and determines the amount of time required for you to stop being a cunt. Then he locks you up until all cuntery has been drained from your systems.

Some people though never stop being a cunt, and we keep them locked up frever :(
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:43, closed)

It's the only sane way to carry on.
How do they determine whether the cuntery has definitely left your system?
Does the system take into account how long it has been since you last bragged about it online?
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:48, closed)

Parole boards
If they said "you dun a rape" and you go "lulz", they have specific government guidelines and flow charts that point to you still being a cunt.
( Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:52, closed)

unless you've atoned for it.... yes

(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:49, closed)

also... what length of time is required for the status of cunt to be rescinded?
were you a cunt yesterday?
were you a cunt 6 months after the even?

I just don't know :(
(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:50, closed)

Yes, I've atoned for it.
In the period following my outrageous actions I went on a real emotional roller-coaster ride.
I'm still not happy about what I did, but neither can I change it.
And to deny that I did it would hardly have helped me change.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:58, closed)

See, now this makes you not a cunt.
Had you merely expressed this in your post, or earlier on, then I wouldn't have called you a cunt.

But your post, and many replies, smack of pride in your actions.

I'm glad you are a more stable person now.

Edit: You're still acting like a cunt now though.
( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:02, closed)

Yeah, I'm glad you felt really bad for not turning yourself in, too

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:05, closed)

There's a difference between "not denying you did it" and "bragging".

(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:16, closed)

DING DING DING!
CORRRRRECT! That was the secret answer we've been looking for... what do we have for her Johnny?
(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:20, closed)

I don't even own an Johnny.

(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:22, closed)

AN I PAYING FOR THIS CARP!

(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:22, closed)

Re-posting a 4 1/2 tale on B3ta hardly constitutes bragging.
And at least I'm contributing something to the content of the site.
Unlike most of the /talk waterheads.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:26, closed)

ahh... so you're saying the post is 4 1/2 years old?
so the first time you posted it was less than 10 years ago?

is that enough for you to be a cunt?
(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:32, closed)

It's bragging.
You know it's bragging.
You're bragging.
LOOK AT THE CLEVER PETTY REVENGE I DUNND AFTER I INSULTED SOMEONE IN HIS OWN HOOME!!!!!!!!
Well done you. On being a petty minded prick.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:33, closed)

Not petty, but yes it was revenge.
And no, it wasn't in his home but that of his partner.
That was abundantly clear in my OP, were you able to read and understand English.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 0:32, closed)

And what the fuck is this "contributing" argument.
I could post the word SPUNK on all the boards over and over. That would be contributing. It wouldn't make for a good website though.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:34, closed)

Preciceleleley.
Thanks.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 0:30, closed)

Haha yeah I wish I admitted to criminal damage in a public forum, too

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:18, closed)

you can't cause much damage with a small plastic disc

(Quinton had to abandon other account as i broke it, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:19, closed)

Indeed
I think they should re-open this cold case right away.
(bROKEN aRROW PUA HVI Master, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:38, closed)

DEAR INTERNET USER
THANK YOU FOR ALERTING ME.
(INTERNETLAWYERMAN, QC ACE ATTORNEY, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:42, closed)

I didn't go to the effort to read this...

(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:46, closed)

Oh, come on. Do it.
There's a whole bandwagon here waiting for you to jump on.
Unless that's not your style.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:50, closed)

read it
*sees bandwagon*
*jumps on bandwagon*
(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:51, closed)

so, your story is 'i am a bitter prick who can't let anything go'?

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 14:57, closed)

If you want to read it that way then go ahead.
Oh hang on a minute, you already did.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:00, closed)

if it wasn't written that way i couldn't interpret it that way.
you bitter prick.
( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:05, closed)

Oh do fuck off.
You pride yourself in being annoying.
You chose to interpret it the way you did just so you could post what you did.
Transparent retard is transparent.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:09, closed)

haha. You're special.

( Two Hats 🎩🎩, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:10, closed)

To be fair, you are a bitter prick who can't let anything go.
So she does kind of a have a point.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:10, closed)

I was right to begin with. You are a cunt.

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:17, closed)

angry prick.

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:28, closed)

To be fair, it's probably the tight bike leathers that's cutting off circulation to his thinking-organ

( Frisbee TeaBoy, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:30, closed)

I didn't get burnt on an internet forum
and I didn't get angry online, at all.
( WormuIus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:58, closed)

Well done on being a cowardly prick.

(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:05, closed)

Sounds fair to me.
Guy was clearly a wanker.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:31, closed)

Yeah! He invited his son-in-law to his home for a drink and then objected when the little prick insulted him in his own home.
Thank heavens for petty-minded pricks saving the world.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:36, closed)

Yeah, seems a pretty reasonable reaction to me
More people should be this way, the world would be a better place.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:39, closed)

It's just a shame that he's lying because he wouldn't have the balls to do any of these things.
On account of being a spineless, petty minded, frustrated little prick.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:44, closed)

That's a shame
I had hoped he'd actually handed out some proper justice, ahh well, at least his heart's in the right place.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:45, closed)

I like seesaws better than the swings.

(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:47, closed)

You
are a retard.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:50, closed)

I MEANT "I LIKE SWINGS MORE THAN SEESAWS".
Please love me.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:09, closed)

no.

( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:10, closed)

ROUNDABOUTS FTMFW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:11, closed)

www.b3ta.com/questions/notme/post1356144
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:13, closed)

haha

( WormuIus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:52, closed)

The levels of autism in this thread are quite spectacular Comrade.

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:46, closed)

Damn right.
I reckon B69 shoulda knifed the cunt.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:53, closed)

I''m not really a stabby kind of guy.
But the cunt would've deserved it.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:45, closed)

*shurgs*
It is the way we do things in Puerta Nueva de la Cruz.
( CQ Knows the truth, all of it., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 17:30, closed)

haha
I'm not proud of what I did

I'D BETTER TELL THE INTERNET
( WormuIus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:40, closed)

TO THE MAGIC BOASTING MACHINE!!

( janet aylia y'all motherfuckers need jesus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:44, closed)

There are, apparently, only two options available to him:
1. Post about it on the internet.
2. Deny he did it.

THERE ARE NO OTHER OPTIONS.
It's not bragging. Honest.
(PERSONALITY HORSE Graham Tapes - free download album - coming soon, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:45, closed)

*pulls up chair*
*watches action from afar*

*awaits Riot Van*
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 15:53, closed)

This one's dead in the water.
On account of none of it being true.
( WormuIus, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:02, closed)

Aye, that's quite obvious enough
Still, fun watching him squirm :)
( Jeccius Steam Borderlands 2 junkie, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:19, closed)

it's part of my rehabilitation
:(
(likeajackhammer, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 16:00, closed)

i realy think this reply section should win regardless of the original post

( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Fri 16 Sep 2011, 20:37, closed)

I'm gonna fuck your on-line credibility here by agreeing with you.
Pure gold.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 21:02, closed)

You did some shitty things but don't think it was shitty to do them?

"i'm sure there was a connection..."
& I hope to fuck that someone can ensure that Carol gets a copy of this thread somehow.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 22:33, closed)

Have you read ALL of my responses?
If you have then you'll appreciate that I know what I did wasn't right.
Yes, he was a proper cunt (for more reasons than I've mentioned, trust me on that).
Yes, I have atoned for what I did.
Yes, a whole lot of self-righteousness has been evident on QOTW today.
Don't forget that you only have a very small snippet, a vignette perhaps, of what was a long and draining period.
Don't be too quick to judge.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Fri 16 Sep 2011, 23:14, closed)

A couple of points:
- at no point in your post or replies have you expressed either remorse or sorrow for what you did, your only defense is that it happened a long time ago and you feel that you have changed as a person since then.
- the property you damaged wasn't even Neils (according to you it was his new missus Carols) so even tho you may have affected him in some way you actually caused his girlfriend (as the home-owner) real financial pain.
- many of your responses come across (I know it's all relative) as defensive, angry and even belligerent. See my 1st point.
I hope I haven't offended you or upset you, but then when you read this a few minutes at least will have passed since I posted it and I was a different person back then...
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 3:58, closed)

Learn to read, or at least work on your comprehension skills.
It was not Carol's house. Presumably matrimonial is too big a word for you.
Yes, I felt remorse about what I did, I point to that a number of times.
Get off your high-horse, prick.

LOL I've just read your sig! Out of the mouths of babes and innocents! Haha you fucking illiterate wanker ;)
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 15:33, closed)

Ooops.
There's that belligerence now.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 22:14, closed)

Do you even know what belligerent means?
Since when did sticking to the facts constitute aggressive or warlike behaviour?
You really are a fucking retard.
Any chance you could respond to the points I raised? Or would that be too much for you?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 23:07, closed)

You refer to Carol as Neil's "whore" not his wife. At no point have you stated clearly that they were married. But as to it being his home or not you did say this -
"And no, it wasn't in his home but that of his partner." Who I'm guessing was... Carol? Apparently that was abundantly clear.
"that fooking well tought him, aye???" doesn't really come across as remorseful. I see nothing to suggest in your OP or responses that shows you feel you may have done something vaguely wrong and feel bad about having done it - lots of "It was a long time ago & I've changed since then" but that's all.
Most of your responses (to me at least if not others) do seem a bit antagonistic.
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 23:52, closed)

Carol was his whore therefore not his wife therefore the matrimonial home was not the home of Carol.
Very, very simple.
Almost as simple as you.
But not quite.

Either stick to the point or fuck off back to mong-ville.
You fucking retarded fucking idiot.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 18 Sep 2011, 0:16, closed)

'king hell, I'm off to bed. I'm sure rembo will provide some entertainment for me tomorrow.
Have education standards slipped so far that a word like matrimonial is now confusing?
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sun 18 Sep 2011, 0:22, closed)

I'm really starting to enjoy this now.
*runs off to find a stick to poke the rabid doggy*
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Sun 18 Sep 2011, 0:22, closed)

Did you atone by paying to sort out the damage you did?
Or just by deciding in your own brain that you've atoned
(Kazza , loathing myself so you don't have to, Sat 17 Sep 2011, 11:18, closed)

Neither.
You fucking Winnet.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 15:34, closed)

I like how you edited it later to say I was a winnet
you feckless cockend
(Kazza , loathing myself so you don't have to, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 22:45, closed)

YOUR ALL GAY

(Bababoon, Sat 17 Sep 2011, 11:08, closed)

Don't listen to all these kill-joys
You did good!
(TheManWithThePlan cussed your mum on, Sat 17 Sep 2011, 15:35, closed)

;)

( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 17:08, closed)

i feel perhaps an early evening spot
on itv's arseholes from hell may be less damaging to your good self and what remains of your tattered perception of right and wrong regardless of time passed.

i will bet that as a child you shit in an other child's toy box when he said you couldn't play with his toys
( fluffybunnykiller Is feasting on the clitoris of life, Sat 17 Sep 2011, 18:10, closed)

Wanker.
Maybe we should start a prog for people who Sellotape other people's eyes shut?
Ever show any remorse?
You fucking Winnet.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 20:26, closed)

I don't know if B3ta is a barometer of society or not...
But there's really quite a marked difference between how this post was recieved originally and now.
Who could know how the common psychi would change over 4 1/2 yrs?
And the number of respondents who can't even read the OP correctly and have made such cocks of themselves with claims like I damaged Carol's house or whatever.
And how many high-horses this week? More than I can count.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 19:49, closed)

Christ on a fucking bike....
Are you guys STILL arguing?

He's a cunt. Let's leave it at that, hey?
(Mao's stepson is doing his bit for East/West relation's, Sat 17 Sep 2011, 18:25, closed)

Ok, so you've changed since you acted the cunt, yeah?
But I'm not allowed to?
Ok, dude.
No double standards or anything.
That's cool.
You fucking Winnet.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 20:19, closed)

I think that should read...
"You fucking win it", though it's still not a terribly graceful concession.
(ubergeekian, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 21:19, closed)

This is probably gonna front page.
Just like it did first time round.
Job done, you muppets.
BTW thanks!
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Sat 17 Sep 2011, 19:32, closed)

WELL DONE CUNTY

( mark morrisons prison shoes I love Willie, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 1:09, closed)

Wow
Just wow - to everything!

I wonder why people didn't get so up in arms to the guy who wrote how he used to break people's side view mirrors for fun. That seems a lot more cuntish to me than this does.

Not that B69's actions are examples of goodliness.

I think we all must have done things in the past that we're not proud of and B69 does actually say that he regrets having gone to the extreme. However the creativity on display here is quite something! Perhaps that is something to brag about? I don't think I can ever come up with such vindictive schemes of revenge.
(Smysha Tra la la!, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 1:28, closed)

It certainly shows some imagination
Me, I'd skip all the plumbing sabotage and settle for an old mobile phone (with a PAYG SIM), a phone charger, a relay across the vibrate motor terminals and a 60W bulb going from Live, through the relay to Earth, all hidden under the floorboards somewhere and connected with the charger on the lighting circuit and the bulb/relay on the ring main. Any call or text, day or night results in the light coming on, tripping the RCD and knocking out all the sockets, cooker, shower, etc. in the house. Nothing like a flashing 12:00 on the clock to wake you up in the morning...
( eXOBeX, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 2:34, closed)

Can you actually do that?
I read the words but they didn't make sense. I got the gist of it and what would happen but I wasn't sure how you'd make it happen. If you could then that would be AMAZING. Lots of revenge and none of the wankery.
(Smysha Tra la la!, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 22:57, closed)

The *really* scary phrase in that post...
"nearly 5 year old wee blaireau".

The thought that an utter bell-end has managed to reproduce does not inspire me with hope for the future.

Gawd help us.
( electric_goat, Sun 18 Sep 2011, 9:03, closed)

I'm confused.
Did this happen in reality, or didn't it?

If it didn't, why're you roasting it, and why're you disputing the cost of the damage in the replies, and saying that it did in the replies? If it did, why are you (apparently, and notwithstanding your assertion to the contrary) apparently so proud of yourself and trying to mitigate your actions by castigating the people on the receiving end, and saying that it didn't in the OP?

DAMN IT, WE NEED CONSISTENCY.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:42, closed)

I'm with Enzyme on this
We need to know whether you're just a bit of a bellend, or a complete and utter psycho. Though, going by your replies, I strongly suspect the latter
(Godwin's Lawyer is more evil than Hitler, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 15:59, closed)

I have to say
I'm proud of you for not deleting this post and taking the criticism like a man. A whinging, cringing, politician of a man, but a man nonetheless.

Right or wrong, you've got a sack on you. and that sack contains some pretty sturdy balls.

but you're still a cunt, albeit a ballsy one.
(CactusZack Shaved his coin purse on, Tue 20 Sep 2011, 22:17, closed)

It's all these cunts, you see.
They bring out the cunt in me.
( blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Tue 20 Sep 2011, 23:25, closed)

Yeah, balls of steel this guy,
slinking away from a beating and tackling the confrontation by surreptitiously sabotaging someones house at great expense to them.
Then posting it on the interwebs (in a braggy kinda way), pearoasting and failing to show any remorse or sorrow when he's utterly lambasted for his actions, justifying it all by simply saying it happened a long time ago and he's changed since then and subsequently becoming rude & abusive to many of the respondents to his OP.
[sarcasm]Makes me feel proud to be a fella, he does.[/sarcasm]
(Misery McUglywife an attention seeking sociopathic fuckstain., Thu 22 Sep 2011, 6:46, closed)