I've just read...
A brilliant article written by a guy called Tim Worstall.

His sarcasm is almost b3tan in nature, and he makes very good points.

Linky - www.theregister.co.uk/2009/01/04/worstall_s3x_trafficking/
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 6 Jan 2009, 13:10, 1 reply, 16 years ago)

Yay! Postman has been.
And delivered my post-christmas present to myself from Amazon, including The Regional Accounts Director of Firetop Mountain which I shall be playing for the rest of today.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Jan 2009, 12:01, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Sixteen Word Stories
Here's something to amuse yourselves with for five minutes. Write a short, concise story using only sixteen words, in the following format:

One word
Two words
Three words
Four words
Three words
Two words
One word

My example in the replies. Have fun!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Tue 6 Jan 2009, 10:21, 59 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Morning all.

( wanderlust, Tue 6 Jan 2009, 7:57, 406 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

So, wanna see what I made?
s78.photobucket.com/albums/j120/tucatz/Stained%20Glass/

One pic is of my parents' Christmas present. One is an overview of a set of windows I did for a friend. One is a detailed view of one window. And the other is a piece I finished last night.

The other two are of the top of a hiking staff I did with the Lunatic Artist a while back.

More to come later.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Tue 6 Jan 2009, 0:27, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Writing Nazi
I like to go on hotornot and mark down people who are over 21 and have an introduction that reads like it was texted in by a remedial 8-year-old. Honestly, the number of people who enjoy "travling"... Although sometimes there's some refreshing honesty.

Conversely, I mark up people who can spell and use grammar and finish a sentence with only one punctuation mark.

I know it will accomplish nothing in the long run, as I can't tell them *why* I do it. But I do it anyway.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 6 Jan 2009, 0:14, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

wank bank
What do you all like to withdraw from the wank bank when having a menage-a-moi?
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 23:19, 5 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Daydream
Someone suggested the QOTW to be what do people daydream about.

Recently, I've been imagining the fun of a time-pause device thingy which would allow me to freeze time while I go about my business, but with none of the plotholes that would be associated with this (gravity only applies when I want it to etc).

Not least the advantages of free shopping, but all the other interesting mischief one could get up to.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 23:17, 4 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Icon
Is my browser playing up or has facebook nicked B3ta's logo.?


( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 22:31, 3 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Am I just not bothered enough?
or is there a way to find out if someone has responded to a comment you made on somebody elses QOTW reply?

I occasionally see people practically carrying on conversations in comments threads. Are they just refreshing a lot?
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 20:47, 13 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Ok I admit it.
I eat bits of food I find dropped down my cleavage after dinner.


What do you own up to?
( girlinthehole, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 20:34, 15 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Time for a fact methinks
Documents recently released by the government reveal that Queen Victoria’s youngest son, Leopold invented the “Stop me and buy one” ice-cream bicycle.
( sandettie light vessel automatic New Twitter - @bollocksreally, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 18:19, Reply)

Time for a Evening Thread I feel


Was my first day at work today.

The real test is tomorrow when the children come back!
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Mon 5 Jan 2009, 18:15, 68 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

As we all know, they're shutting down QOTW.
But when the day comes to up chips and move on. Will you head to:

/Board?
/Talk?
/Links?
Or will you have a big loud tantrum on all three, and storm off. Only to return a week after?



Let's have big fat poll.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Mon 5 Jan 2009, 15:43, 18 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

101st Grand Prize Draw
Well, after thirty-three years, Reader's Digest have finally caught up with me.

Today I recieved my first ever fake cheque for £250,000.

Hell knows how they found me - only Inland Revenue and DWP know I live here, so someone's on the make.

But that's besides the point. What I want to know is, is it worth me responding for the chance to win money? Or is it just an excuse to send me even more junk mail?

Run my life for me, Off Topic!
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 15:38, 10 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

TMI? Perhaps..
...But I just want to share this. I have had the flu, and as a side-effect, have currently lost my sense of smell.

I just wanted to say what a total let down having a poo is when you cannot smell the results

That is all.
( bentalls In my head, I am a ninja, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 15:13, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I'm considering going broadband.
Does anyone here use the Post Office? Is it any good?

What should I avoid? I'm only interested in broadband and phone packages.
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 13:48, 13 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

YAAAAAAA!
www.ticketmaster.co.uk/event/1F004193A20031A5?artistid=975530&majorcatid=10001&minorcatid=200

Cannibal Corpse are coming to Manchester! Brutality!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 12:54, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

So, what are your thoughts on the Gaza conflict?

(__, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 11:32, 20 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Start the year as you mean to go on...
ignoring work, hanging around in today's Home Sweet Home.


( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Mon 5 Jan 2009, 7:58, 304 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Tomorrow we decide.
www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post336347




This may be the most important vote you will ever cast in the history of voting..........or not.
( girlinthehole, Sun 4 Jan 2009, 19:06, 14 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Let's have a Sunday thread,
just in case anyone's about...

( thealternativefact, Sun 4 Jan 2009, 11:02, 137 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

My folks bought me an electric toothbrush for chrimbo.
It's such a shame tongues can't have orgasms.
( Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Sat 3 Jan 2009, 23:05, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Food for thought.
So we all know that digital rectal massage cures hiccups. The medicos know it, we know it.....hell most of us have probabally tried it.

What I want to know is how was this discovery made? At what point in having hiccups did someone think to themselves, "You know, I could really go for a finger up my bum right about now." Was this someone who was just so in need of sexy time they couldn't even wait for their hiccups to end?

Or was this someone so desparate for the end of their hiccups that they were trying everything they could think of. "Let's see, tickle between my toes. No, hiccups still present. How about lick my knees. Nope, still hiccupping. Hmmm...finger up the bum..... Eureka!"


And how long did this guy (I'm assuming here) sit on the new discovery before embarassingly admitting that he discovered the ultimate cure but, with cheeks aflame, it involves privacy and lube. And how many people dismissed his claim as pure perversion before trying it themselves....only to be far too shame faced to stand up and say, "My name is George and I too find that fingering my bum cures hiccups.....erm..please excuse my erection."

Someone please enlighten me. Just how was this discovery made?
( flirting with badgers What? It sounded good at the time., Sat 3 Jan 2009, 22:01, 9 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung
grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung grung LOL WAKI!
( baldmonkey a frothy foul-smelling vaginal discharge, Sat 3 Jan 2009, 20:21, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

For those who worry
I did not rebreak my collar bone on the skislope today. Didn't even make it twinge. So hurrah!
(darras jeg har en grevling i hodet. Grevling, grevlang, Sat 3 Jan 2009, 20:13, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Help me with a question please
I have a 'life size' 3D cardboard R2D2 that I want to sell on e-bay. But I have no idea what the starting price should be.

What would you pay?
( Mrs Entity is in hiding., Sat 3 Jan 2009, 17:18, 7 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Don't try this at home!
Last night I had a splendid evening getting slowly twatted in one of Sheffield's less salubrious establishments. Many pints of Mulled ale, Rockin' Robin & many other pints of beers which names presently escape me.

I pottered off home and after a nip of scotch to keep out the cold, admitted that sobriety was no longer my bedfellow and hit the hay. I awoke to the feeling that something was seriously wrong and then suffered that sinking feeling ............ I realised that I was stood in the corner of our bedroom, cock in hand and was pissing all over the plugged in stereo which was faithfully playing the World Service.

I had even lifed the lid to expose the CD player (possibly thinking it was the bog seat) and my missus slept soundly through the whole sorry affair.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Sat 3 Jan 2009, 10:40, 8 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Whats worse
than being raped by Jack the Ripper?

Being fingered by Captain Hook.
(Lord Chode, Fri 2 Jan 2009, 19:43, 2 replies, latest was 16 years ago)