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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Where d'ya live?
...Oh yeah? How d'ya get to work?
...Petrol or diesel?
...Can you claim that back?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:45, 235 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
In Milton Keynes
In Milton Keynes
Walking
no but if I cycled I could.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:46, Reply)
The East End of that there Londinium.
Bus then tube then walk.
No thanks.
I wish, my Oyster card is £152 a month.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:48, Reply)
hmm
you say londinium, i say londinium

does this make me a younger version of you?
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:23, Reply)
Leverpoyl
Walk
?
No but if I cycled I could get a bike loan.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:49, Reply)
You should get a bike.
Then you can shoot children playing outside pubs on your way home.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:51, Reply)
Convenient

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
i do not live in Crockie

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
You could "cycle-by" there though

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)
Bet they're all drinking bottles of pop and eating packets of Smiths Crisps with the little blue bag of salt
Ah...happy days waiting for your pissed parents to stagger outside.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)
Salt n Shake.
*wonders if they still make them, I've not had a packet in YEARS*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)
They do.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
This is good news.
I might have to find some. From memory the crisps were really bland and the salt never stuck to the crisps, regardless of how well you shook the bag.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)
Lick the crisps first

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
That might work for you, what with all the licking practice you get from windows, but it isn't going to work for me.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
When my wife was a little girl she was in the pub with her parents and their friends
She licked the flavour off every crisp in a pack, her mum's friend then ate them all before complaining that they were a little bland...
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)
Is your wife 'of Romany stock' by any chance?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
The licking is why he is married to her

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
Or else two crisps would be so salty you couldn't eat them and the rest
bland.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
But you could always wash them down with a nice glass of orange and pineapple Quash.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)
Orange AND pineapple?
My, you were posh. We only had orange. Or nun flavour.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)
We were double posh.
We always started the morning off with a glass of 'Rise n Shine' powdered orange juice.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)
I was lucky if I got a cup of tepid tea

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)
I was allowed Um Bongo
They drink that in the Congo, you know.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:10, Reply)
Way down deep?

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
Blue Nun isn't nun-flavoured.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
That's because it's white
If they made Red Blue Nun, it would be. Or possibly altar boy flavour.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)
In the sticks
Car
Depends which one I take
No
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:50, Reply)
Hello gorgeous.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:51, Reply)
Hello yourself!
How's life?
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
Moderate, thank you.
How's life in the countryside?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)
Fecund
And the city?
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)
I like that word
But I like you more.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
I've decided to start calling you Klaus.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)
Kinsky?
Or Santa?
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)
Barbie.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
I was always a Sindy girl myself.

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)
Me too!
Sindy rocked! Now she just looks like a cheap Barbie knock-off.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
You're right
The original Sindy was ace. My first one had a cool mini fur coat with a Russian style hat to match. She looked like a 1960s model - Jean Shrimpton I think.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)
May I ask why?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
The butcher of Lyons.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:03, Reply)
I can't see what I've done to be likened to a war criminal
My torture and murder counts are nowhere near his top score.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)
This is very witty
And I'm assuming refers to Rory.
What did you do Labs? Puncture him with your massive mohawk?
I'd pay to see that.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)
Yeah, my massive 'mohawk'
I bet you'd pay to see that, you pervert.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
*winks*
*trigger fingers*
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:10, Reply)
It refers to Lab smashing both his legs in by running into a barbecue, or 'barbie'.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)
Only one leg, but both tib and fib
And I'm in a good mood today, so I won't post a certain picture...
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:13, Reply)
go arn, go arn, go arn, go arn

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)
A picture?
I'm intrigued....
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:17, Reply)
It makes Monty shit himself
Even this vague description is probably making him sweat and look around nervously.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)
Please....don't do it.....

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:22, Reply)
Does it make you both sweat?
*pervs*
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:24, Reply)
Profusely.


But the sweat is stone cold. Cold, like the eyes of a KILLER.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:29, Reply)
Well, that's stopped me from feeling frisky

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)
And now I'll not feel frisky whenever there's a full moon

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:45, Reply)
Foetid.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
That's a good word too
After the fecundity it all goes foetid.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
Enough of this tomfoolery
I must get up and do some work. Or drink coffee.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:51, Reply)
So why, pray tell
are you still lounging in bed surrounded by cats? Hmmm?
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:18, Reply)
It's nearly an hour since you said you were getting up
Why are you still lying there?
You have to be in town in three hours. At this rate you'll be late.
Slattern.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
And don't use comfort as an excuse
They're cats; you're not.
Get your lazy arse out.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)
It varies
Drive
Diesel
You bet baby, all through the books
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:50, Reply)
Backworth, near Whitley Bay
Convenient Metro station at the end of my estate. 20 mins into Newcastle. I believe it is powered my magic string.
Work subsidised Metro pass - £29 a month
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:50, Reply)
You have some magic string powered by the Metro?

We need to have words about this lying, I think. It's getting out of hand now.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
Damn my ketxsbgdoard skillz
I need a coffee now and a beer at 12
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)
I want a magic string
Where can I get one?
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
He doesn't fucking know. He's one of those internet fantasists.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:57, Reply)
Fuck.
Not another one.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)
Yup.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
Everyone is moy freind

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
Tod
Car
Petrol
I don't pay for my fuel
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:51, Reply)
Your car is powered by AWESOME!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
The only think I pay for is my road tax.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:53, Reply)
Thief!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
Northants
Car
Petrol
Nope
(I helped save b3ta! Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
IT'S A NOOB!!
ARE YOU FEMALE ????
(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
*prays it's a single male*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)
SSSH or you'll frighten it away

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:54, Reply)
Is it too far away though?
Logistics. Logistics!
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)

a e
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)
A single mele?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
I was going for "preys"
but I accept this was not up to my usual standard. Please accept my apologies, internet.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)
You are in so much internet credit you have a good ten more of these in the bank.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
Who cares they've got a name a bit like snack food
they'll be popular.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
No, male and married.

(I helped save b3ta! Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)
Well, at least you won't be perved on by the boys.
Except one, obviously.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
Just one?

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
Are you responsible for a blog bemoaning the lack of ketchips?

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
We love bloggers round here

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)
Damn right we do.
I was only just tweeting about how much I love bloggers, just a minute ago.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:12, Reply)
That's a lie
You don't tweet.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:18, Reply)
It's a fucking gigantic lie.
I most certainly do fucking well not 'tweet', neither do I 'blog'.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:23, Reply)
I do both
but then I also Facebook.
I'm just an attention seeking flibertygibit.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:25, Reply)
No blog about ketchips.
I remember them fondly but that might just be nostalgia.
(I helped save b3ta! Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
Do you have crisps though?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
I've got some Seabrook Salt & Vinegar for later

(I helped save b3ta! Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:03, Reply)
I just had some baked cheesecake, sooo good

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)
Damn!!!!
You're all fucking married.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
Fuck off bert
*hugs a little too tightly*
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:57, Reply)
No grinding

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)
*bumps but does not grind*

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
That's not what I'm seeing from here

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
You don't see the bump and grind
you feel it's eroticism
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:05, Reply)
Believe me,
from this angle I can see EVERYTHING.

Please put your pants back on.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)

ok, sorry
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
Thank you
Now the horses will calm down. Finally.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:19, Reply)
Barnes in that there london
Drive
Petrol, 1 litre of awesome power
Nah, unless I use the car to get to clients
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
Straford-upon-Avon
Car or bicycle
Petrol or burgers
No and no.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:52, Reply)
But don't you take the Bardcycle?
I'm on fire today!
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:56, Reply)
*chucks bucket of water over Madame Poulet*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
Now I'm all wet!

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
PHWOOOARRRRR

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:13, Reply)
Engage the Pandatron
NOW!!
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:19, Reply)
All those slings and arrows cost a fortune in tyre repairs.

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:01, Reply)
You ought to try a bit of hubbling and bubbling
That should sort the tyre out.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:03, Reply)
I'm too busy holding my peace

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)
Is this a cycle path I see before me?

(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
It might be if cunts round here didn't park in the damn thing

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
With your outrageous fortune?

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
I long to go once more unto the breach
Until then, the play's the thing.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)
Well, if all the world's a stage..

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:12, Reply)
I'm sure "Shakespeare's logic told me I could do it"
Is not a good defense in a public indecency case.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
If that bloke shagging bicycles could get off
then there's no reason you shouldn't either.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)
Did he get away with it?

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)
The prosecution punctured his defence.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:24, Reply)
*clicks*

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:26, Reply)
What you need, mate, is a horse.
And it just so happens I've got a spare knocking around, all it'll cost you is a kingdom.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)
That's the second time I've heard you say that. Have I missed a meme somewhere?
Weston super Mare
I live at work innit
Diesel, when I go on buying runs
Yes. I have a very nice accountant.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
Fighting Talk meme from my future husband.
Your brother knows it too.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)
Right then
I still have no idea what to get the miserable bastard for his birthday. Do you think I could get away with a cup of tea and a manly handshake?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:17, Reply)
Cup of tea and a hand shandy?
Is that you, Miss Monkeysex?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:25, Reply)
Vouchers.
He hates everything we buy him anyway.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:26, Reply)
yeah, he gets that from dad
or from being a bloke.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:27, Reply)
Germany
15 mins on the tram. Always get a seat. Costs €55 a month which includes travel to towns within a 50km radius of where I live.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:55, Reply)
But you're surrounded by Germans.
So it isn't that good a deal is it?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:57, Reply)
Germans are great, what are you on about?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)
I was just trying to get a reaction from you.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:02, Reply)
How very dare you!
Germany is a lovely place to live. Once you get past the beaurocracy, that is...
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:59, Reply)
There a re too many Jews there these days. That's my only gripe.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:00, Reply)
Jews?
You mean fucking Turks, surely?
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:03, Reply)
He lumps all semites together.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)
I think most of the German Turks I met were Muslim
They tend to be not that keen on the Jews.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:08, Reply)
They are still racially semitic
Just different in the religon department.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
My brother's ex is a journalist for the Juden press,
and once wrote an article called 'Are The Taliban Jewish?'


(yes, apparently)
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)
But are they kosher?

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:22, Reply)
Elephant and Castle
Bike
Diesel fumes mostly from buses
Subsidised by Cycle to Work scheme
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 10:58, Reply)
have you seen the ghost bikes chained at junctions? they make me worry about you

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:09, Reply)
Ghost bikes?!
Er, nope! I do know someone who has an outrageous crush on a barrier on the Walworth Road, keeps leaving flowers and cards there :/
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:12, Reply)
hahaha!

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:13, Reply)
Hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
As a non-cyclist I find this amusing, well done

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)
It's probably that bird who married the Berlin Wall.
She cheated on it with a fence, so she clearly gets around a bit.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)
The dirty slag.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:19, Reply)
And she had a fling with the Eiffel tower
Some women are never satisfied.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)
The Eiffel fucking tower?
I feel inadequate.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:42, Reply)
An aqueduct you say?

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:46, Reply)
there's a few at busy junctions painted white to symbolise people who died on the road
There was an article on them in the evening standard yesterday
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:19, Reply)
Ah no, I haven't seen that :(
Lots more accidents happening though, big thing about trying to get trucks larger than Lutons to stay outside the inner ring road.
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:25, Reply)
this is why I worry

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
I saw one of those ages ago
It had been 'adopted' by the family and friends of a person who'd died and they'd all decorated the bike.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:27, Reply)
yeah that's the ones I mean

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:29, Reply)
In Wroclaw in Poland
there's a bike all crushed into some cobbles with a pair of glasses.
It's a memorial to the Tiananmen Square massacre, and a tribute to protestors. Or summat.

Spooky.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
In Trafalgar Square, there's a half-eaten roll in a bin,

It's a memorial to Bella.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:39, Reply)
hahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:48, Reply)
Wotcha.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)
you coming to the pub tonight?

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)
I am looking after my daughter, I'm afraid.
Toy Story 3 and a book about bears for my Friday night entertainment.

I'm most sorry. Have an internet pint from me. I know it's a bit early, but fuck it, eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:18, Reply)
that sounds quite nice actually

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)
I cannot lie, it'll be brilliant.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)
Pub?
Where, when?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:25, Reply)
They're everywhere, Jim lad.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:27, Reply)
multiplying by the minute
Like mongs
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)
Damn those randy mongs. Damn them to hell.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)
NO MONGS

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:27, Reply)
don't worry al'll behave

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)
He never behaves around my fiancé
They can't keep their balls off each other.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)
dit won't be there to egg him on. saw him and flim last night instead

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:34, Reply)
I am jealous of where they are going. I won't say where in case she don't know.

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:40, Reply)
Bristol
Walk, train, tube
Petrol in the noddy car
No (Edit: I get London weighting, so it's subsidised to an extent)
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:04, Reply)
We have a tube in Bristol?
I was not aware of this fact!

In other news, I saw your wedding article on that website thingie. It was very nice. As a fellow married-on-s-shoestring-er, I approve greatly.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)
I think it starts at the bear pit roundabout in the centre

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
There's definitely an underground smell there, yeah.

(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:17, Reply)
nah, I have a 250 mile round trip to work.
Cool, thanks very much - there've been over 16000 views on the flickr page, which freaks me out a little, but it's probably just the 15,999 times my mum viewed them, and then you.
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)
gazzy linky?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:18, Reply)
I think everyone on here viewed my wedding pictures yesterday.
That freaked me out a tiny bit. Then I got over it.

Today I have a massive fuck-off spot hatching right in the middle of my bastard chin. I am not amused. However, there is no photographic proof, so that's okay.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:20, Reply)
I haven't seen them. Now I want to see them.
How do I see them?
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)
i just gazzed you innit?

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:28, Reply)
Ooh, lovely.
Awesome cleavage!!
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)
I now have a photo of that cleavage on top of my sideboard.

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)
So do I.

/Creepylolz.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:36, Reply)
You could use it to frighten the little'un

(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)
Oh I don't need any help with that.


/Creepylolz
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:38, Reply)
apparently
that's the general concensus. I'm not a fan, myself.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)
this
there is a tube in bristol?
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:26, Reply)
Not unless they've extended the Central line past Ealing Broadway, no.

(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:28, Reply)
aah
well it does mean i don't have to commute with poor people
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:31, Reply)
The Bristol 'underground'
www.cliftonrocksrailway.org.uk/history_06.htm
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)
Oh aye, I forgot about that.
Plus the Severn Beach line goes under the downs.
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)
they open that every now and then dont they?
on open doors day, there are also a lot of caves that would be good to explore in the centre
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
Luton
Car
Diesel
Company mileage can be claimed back, but the commute to work is classed as private mileage by the tax man, so if you claim it back your tax bill will be mega. Basically, wave goodbye to your personal allowance.
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:06, Reply)
zone 5
Car or walk downstairs depending on which surgery I'm at.
Diesel
I don't pay
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:07, Reply)
Hiyaaaaa

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:11, Reply)
ello lovelyface
What time are you getting into town today?
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:15, Reply)
Sadface
Wish I could make it.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:17, Reply)
that's cos you're rubbish innit
No offence
(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:21, Reply)
None taken
I'll be coming down soon though.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:23, Reply)
Just after 7 :)

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:29, Reply)
yay :)

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)
:((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((
I want to come.
But can't.
Again.
Fucksocks.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)
I'll pour some liquour on the floor for you

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:40, Reply)
Al'll lick it up

(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:49, Reply)
Gawd he will as well

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:51, Reply)
bugger, next time lovely

(I helped save b3ta! fuck shit up the best you never had, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:43, Reply)
Naaaaaaaarch
Walk. Takes about 20 minutes.
Pardon?
I really don't know what you're talking about. Is this something to do with those new-fangled horseless carriages?
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:10, Reply)
Tottenham, innit.
I travel via Bob Crow's Network of Greed.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:12, Reply)
Guildford
Yup, driving.
Petrol.
£300 per month of non-reclaimable expenses. Yay free market economy!
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:13, Reply)
Macclesfield
Tytherington
I get a lift, then walk home
Nope
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:14, Reply)
Alright, Aggers?
Telling any lies on the internet today?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:16, Reply)
He told me that he's not an transvestite emo earlier

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:19, Reply)
'Jackie Chan wants what?'
I love Kenny Senior in Phoenix nights. He's the patron saint of internet liars, you know.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)
I believe Jackie Chan wanted the tins of paint.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)
Chuck Norris wanted woodchip wallpaper.
Genius.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
"Ever smelt burning flesh, son?"
"Yeah."
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:44, Reply)
No, Neil and my brother sat me down, and said I can't talk about them anymore
After Neil was terrified by someone running up to him in the street, screaming "I know who you are" in his face.

He nearly had a fucking 'art attack.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:26, Reply)
Hahahahah

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:28, Reply)
brizzle
work in oxford (for another week) so car
diesel
no, but did when i was contracting

from the 3rd of may
work in brizzle so cycle into work which will be nice and cheap
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:24, Reply)
I don't know how people can cycle in Bristol
It's like a fucking death trap round that bit in the centre. It terrifies me, and I'm usually in the car when I'm there.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:30, Reply)
Bristol was (I think) the UKs first cycling city.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:32, Reply)
Flying city?
What are you on man?
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:33, Reply)
Bob Martins, I think.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
One of my sons had some of them once
I telephoned the Poisons Department of a famous London Hospital (I didn't know they had a poisons department either, I assume I was one fat bloke in a white coat). When I read out the active ingredient they laughed at me.
Who knew that cat worming tablets are just the same as human worming tablets? But they did tell me his nose would be damp for a few days.
(I helped save b3ta! chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:42, Reply)
It's the hills that get me.
I seem to live at the bottom of every hill in Bristol.
(I helped save b3ta! crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:35, Reply)
i made the mistake of cycling to work in clifton from hanham
on a massive downhill bike. it sucked.

i have now got a road bike/commuter which is much easier to use, though only one speed so the hills will hurt as ever
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:37, Reply)
According to your sig
There are always a couple of Bristols finest hills just in front of you
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:40, Reply)
hence the term
nice bristols
(I helped save b3ta! zulu eh?, Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:42, Reply)
Aus.
car.
petrol.
no. :(
(Poppet some assembly required., Fri 15 Apr 2011, 11:24, Reply)

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