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Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Dead thread appears to be dead.
Facebook keeps suggesting that I look at a photo of berk taken on her birthday when her boobies are rather prominent.

When did technology last suggest something useful or inappropriate to you?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:35, 162 replies, latest was 14 years ago)
My facebook keeps suggesting I look at holiday pics of my mate topless
I'm not a big fan I think someone might have changed my sexuality on there again.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:37, Reply)
Actually saying that then reloading has shown me a friend and some random in bikinis.
It's becoming self aware.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)
Now it's showing me labs.
It's like an explosion in a chin factory.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:41, Reply)
Facebook alerted me to the fact that the Sisters are playing in Camden in November.
Woo for technology.

And yes, I know the photo to which you are referring.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:39, Reply)
Keeps offering instant weightloss adverts
which can fuck right off.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:41, Reply)
Facebook keeps suggesting I try a face cream that's a miracle worker.
Or that I join the lesbian dating site.

How does it fucking know?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:42, Reply)
It detects sensible shoes and dungarees when you upload a photo.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:45, Reply)
But how does it detect the desperation?
Must be the eyes.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:46, Reply)
how many times you say "I'm desperate" in your status updates.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:47, Reply)
Ah! of course.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:47, Reply)
I get a bit freaked out by the fact that it does that. I get offered Belgravia Hair Replacement Therapy all the time and it can only be through scanning photos of me that it would know to do that.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:48, Reply)
People on the internet keep saying that I'm shit at art and my name is a rude word.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:43, Reply)
People must say that to you in real life as well.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:43, Reply)
The word which is written and pronounced differently to my name I think must be quite new because I've only heard of it in the last year or so
as for the art, I only ever really talk about art with people who know quite a lot about the subject. I've never really had that sort of reaction to what I make, then again, people I think feel quite differently about it when they see it in the flesh (and realise how its been made).
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:49, Reply)
You use an etch a sketch and a porno mag don't you?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:50, Reply)
How passe!

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:52, Reply)
I use porn as reference material and I use a computer to make those images, so yes sort of.
I've changed them recently to make it slightly easier for people to 'get' how I make them. Lots of people see the prints and assume they are photographs or are photographs with a filter on them or something.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:54, Reply)
Given the above, I can't think of a single reason why anyone might think that your art is shit.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:01, Reply)
Jealousy I imagine.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:08, Reply)
maybe it just is
really shit?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:09, Reply)
Vincent Van Cock?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:43, Reply)
Cuntstable?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:45, Reply)
cuntstubble more like

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:05, Reply)
I think they're cunningly referring to
www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=winnit

which has been around for ages in Viz.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)
Facebook keeps suggestion I add work mates
I have no idea how it even knows about them, that are not even friends on my 'proper' FB account, unless it's somehow getting stuff from my Skype account, it's rather disturbing.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:44, Reply)
My LinkedIn recommended I add Chompy
Aside from on here, I've had no contact with him at all. I still find that a bit odd.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:51, Reply)
Only because you share B3ta mates on FB.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:52, Reply)
My LinkedIn and my facebook aren't linked either, not even by email address

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:55, Reply)
I'd be much more successful in life
if I had the same 'never back down, never give up' attitude of LinkedIn, because I haven't used it in about 6 years and I still get bi weekly emails asking me if I want to review my contacts.

People have been arrested for stalking for less harrassment.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:53, Reply)
Mine was a random sales guy I do not socialise with.
I have him on Skype, because we use it at work. I don't even thing my skype is associated with the same email account as my FB.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:53, Reply)
I can't fucking stand LinkedIn's policies, they're the only major social network that gets away with spamming your entire email without ovbouse prior written conditions.
Searching through contacts is not the same as contacting contacts.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:02, Reply)
If you read the terms and conditions on facebook
You will see that you have agreed to allow them to search through your computer, email accounts, etc. if they choose to find out more about you. It is a bit naughty, I think.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:01, Reply)
Hey Tangles.
Sorry to say I shall not be able to make your gig as I have been asked to have my son tomorrow night. Let me know if you have another one in the same sort of area and I'll try to make that.

I'll have a look at the Ts&Cs.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:06, Reply)
No worries Quey
I'll let you know of any others, although we are not the exactly hardest working band...
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:08, Reply)
No probs
I'm not a hard working audience member.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:10, Reply)
Wait, what, proper account? you have two and i'm only part of one? SAD TIMES

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:01, Reply)
I have one in my real name that I never use.
My son and ex-wife are on it, so I can't swear or talk about anything interesting, hence why I do not use it and can't close it without grief.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:08, Reply)
I reckon Superman, Batman and Spiderman all have different accounts for their two identities, too.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)
Can you imagine the lols
if they got pissed one night and forgot which account they were using? It would be like people on here flitting between normal and sockpuppet accounts and then forgetting which one they were logged in as. With hilarious consequences.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:21, Reply)
*Spider-Man
Trust me on that.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:39, Reply)
Geek.
I knew that as well
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:40, Reply)
I learnt humiliatingly and publicly:
www.b3ta.com/questions/irrationalhatred/post1147017
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:44, Reply)
?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:45, Reply)
It's Spider-Man, not Spiderman.
Not that I care, but see above for why I know.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:46, Reply)
Facebook keeps suggesting I attend an appearance by Danny Dyer at my local nightclub
How does it know I own a well-sharpened axe ideal for use on just such an occasion? How??
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:54, Reply)
My ex-wife is still on my friends list on FB, although I have my account privacy set so that she can't see very much
But I frequently get asked to suggest friends for her. I think that's quite funny 'cos she doesn't have many friends in real life, never mind on fucking Facebook.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 14:55, Reply)
Do you still have the odd crafty wank over her photos?
Just for old times sake, you know.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:03, Reply)
Haha!

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:08, Reply)
You missed
'or is that just me?' off the end of your question, I think.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:08, Reply)
Haha
You must be joking, she's a huge biffer these days. One of many reasons why she is the now ex-Mrs Fister.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:12, Reply)
The word biffer is not used enough in everyday conversation, I feel.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)
Average number of friends I have in common with Facebook's "suggested friends": 10
Number I actually know IRL: 0
Perhaps I am missing great networking opportunities here, but I am too unsociable/socially awkward to add these people.
Also, if we would make such great friends, then why haven't they added me?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:04, Reply)
I'd add you if I knew who you were.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:09, Reply)
You can go and "like" Tailor and the Crow if you wish
you might find me then.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:10, Reply)
work work work
are you the beardy one?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:13, Reply)
We both have beards from time to time
I'm the less good-looking one
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)
This was the joke.
Are you the one from Coventry or the one from Dublin? Actually fuck it, just friend me if you feel like it, I'm easy to find.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)
I'm the one who just "friended" you
And it has been pointed out before that I am rather slow on the uptake in the afternoons...
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)
Use more lube

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:21, Reply)
Will do

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)
I've just realised
I'm the bloke who said I didn't know who you were the other day.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:13, Reply)
Huh?
my FB name is Comrade Quixote FFS. I swaer at the next bash I'm wearing a name badge...
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:14, Reply)
That was just before I'd come back to OT, (coincidentally the day Noel flounced, although the two are not connected.)
for the first time in years, so I hadn't made the backward connection until this conversation reminded me.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)
Wait a minute - it's your fault Noel flounced??

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)
Well I did come back about half a day before he fucked off
but I'm trying not to take it personally.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:28, Reply)
ahh, right.
SO you're Noel's sock then. Got it.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)
I read that as suck noel's cock.
I'm a bad girl.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:24, Reply)
You are mental looking

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:20, Reply)
Yes, yes I am.
It's a pretty accurate picture.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:24, Reply)
You look like you should be 'protesting' against something by clogging up my city with your hemp tousers and bongo drums

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)
Yes, this is totally me.
Well, the bongo drums anyway.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:31, Reply)
I suspect you have a didgeridoo tucked away at the back of a cupboard somewhere too...

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:33, Reply)
hehe!
at the back of the cupboard in your pants.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:35, Reply)
In my defence it was a present and I cannot play it.
I periodically try to give it away.

What a digeridoo?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:43, Reply)
Things that an aborigine don't?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:51, Reply)
+n

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:55, Reply)
Fine.
Thinngs that an Aborigine don't.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:57, Reply)
Haha
None of the people I have seen with a didgeridoo can actually play it.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:51, Reply)
People keep giving me instruments even though I can't play them
it's odd, I must look musical.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:55, Reply)
http://www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1358274

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:59, Reply)
well, yes..

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:10, Reply)
a couple of losers in america give out my email address instead of their own
hence the fact that i get lots of emails about black 50+ singles in the new york area, and messages from 50+ black men in the new york area who want to date me. the poor real rachel swipe must wonder why she is getting no responses...

..... and i got 137 emails on fri from the other dickhead and all her friends who have been to VEGAS yay VEGAS on a HEN DO and it was SO EXCITING and if they don't take me off the loop i am going to fly over there myself and garrotte the lot of them.

anyway, maybe as a consequence of this, i get millions of spam emails offering me granny porn, to browse topless pics of 50+, and viagara.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:08, Reply)
the phrases 'spam' and 'granny porn' should not sit next to each other

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:11, Reply)
Because it's not Spam when you've signed up for it?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:12, Reply)
because it makes me think of granny spam purses

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:14, Reply)
*makes spam and cheese toastie*
*peels apart*
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)
Yeah, some idiot in the US uses my email address as well.
I get very specific medical details and home addresses of people in her prayer circle.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)
Fun times.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:16, Reply)
I might wait for them to go into hospital then go round and burgle 'em.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:17, Reply)
Most of the email I get is spam.
An alarming amount of it is for breast enlargements. Coincidentally, the missus gets emails about penis enlargements.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)
Well we know for sure that one of them is not needed.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)
Sadly it's not the one Davros was hoping it would be.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:22, Reply)
She just made an enquiry
She's not committed him to anything yet.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)
I know.
I mean, I'd like for them to be a bit bigger but she's perfectly happy with them as they are, and who am I to ask her to go under the knife purely for my own gratification?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)
This is why I've given up checking all the time.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)
Can I suggest that everyone looks at this?
webfe.sickipedia.org/sys/wormuluscam/
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:13, Reply)
You've linked this several times, an unfunny moving picture TOP INTERNET what would we do without you

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:18, Reply)
Interesting, I count twice.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:20, Reply)
You're good value AA.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)
What can I say, I come from good stock.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:27, Reply)
It stops being funny after the 89th watch.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:19, Reply)
I disagree.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:22, Reply)
It was really funny when cr3 made that about 2 years ago.
Still makes me smile but maybe you're just feeding the troll now?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)
Tis very true
It appeared in a search I was doing last week, I'd completely forgotten about it.

Made me laugh, so I thought another airing wouldn't be too offensive. Will let it lie now, methinks.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)
Some pretty impressive asteroid pics
www.theregister.co.uk/2011/09/19/dawn_vesta_imagery/
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:21, Reply)
Are those actual film images from the probe or Computer Generated images from data obtained by the probe?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:25, Reply)
Hurr hurr hurr.
You said 'probe'.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:25, Reply)
hurr hurr hurr
He said it twice.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:26, Reply)
*shrug*
edit: I'd say it's probably been touched up, but I think it's actually the photos.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:27, Reply)
Very good, although I didn't feel the voice over added much

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:25, Reply)
I have my computer on mute so I didn't even know it had one.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:30, Reply)
I'ts an annoying American lady describing exactly what you can see for yourself

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:31, Reply)
Astrophysics chicks are usually super hot.
Late 90's films taught me that.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:32, Reply)
state your sources

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:32, Reply)
Deep impact and that,
dunno throwaway comment don't grill me too much.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:34, Reply)
Now FB is telling me I should give single dads a chance.
Why? what have they ever done for me?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:23, Reply)
Fingerbangs

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:27, Reply)
Ok, apart from fingerbangs, what have single dad's ever done for me?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:28, Reply)
spread their oats away from your womb

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:29, Reply)
Anal?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:42, Reply)
Ok, apart from fingerbangs, not get me pregnant and anal, what have single dad's ever done for me?
Monty Python lols!
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:44, Reply)
Kept you company on B3ta?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:05, Reply)
That particular picture has attracted a worrying amount of attention
I didn't think they were that on show, you know? Perhaps I'll detag it.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:36, Reply)
QUICK, AL, LINK ME BEFORE SHE DOES.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:46, Reply)
But then what will Al look at?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:57, Reply)
You?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:02, Reply)
He is bulimic

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:11, Reply)
fuck me this is cheap
www.ebuyer.com/251310-extra-value-desktop-7873-1036
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:38, Reply)
ought a zoostorm laptop that was also good value, although it didn't come with office which is annoying
as now I have to buy it or torrent it, but I'm scared of torrenting software
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:41, Reply)
Use open office

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:42, Reply)
wassat then?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:43, Reply)
Free office program from Sun Microsystems
compatable with Office files and fairly easy to use.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:44, Reply)
^this
tis good.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:44, Reply)
It doesn't have an equivalent of Outlook does it.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:45, Reply)
Never use outlook and I use open office for very basic needs.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:47, Reply)
Thunderbird/sunbird
Thunderbird I use and it's good. Not used sunbird but memory tells me it does the calendar bit.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:52, Reply)
I use Thunderbird for my personal mail account
but if I were a business user I wouldn't be able to put up with it's limitations.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:56, Reply)
Not that I disagree, I don't use it for business
but I'm curious which limitations.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:07, Reply)
I'm sure it's down to me not needing to use it very much and therfore not bothering to learn how it works
but I just find it harder to use and for some reason it appears to have eaten my archive of old messages, fortunately they were just calender reminders.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:11, Reply)
I find the constant updates annoying
But that could just be me.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:13, Reply)
That said, I've just discovered that you can export messages as individual files
rather than relying on Outlooks annoying .pst format.

Hmmmm, this might require looking into further.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:15, Reply)
Thunderbird also allows you to manage several email accounts at once
Usually good at auto-detecting the settings for work email and gmail these days (though hotmail reminds a dysfunctional nightmare in this respect)
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:56, Reply)
It is also great for getting teenagers drunk

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:03, Reply)
That sounded quite noncey
/not a nonce
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:03, Reply)
I remember, that and Mad Dog 20/20
Hawaiian Blue being my Favorite.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:05, Reply)
Cool will look into it, thanks boys and girls

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:46, Reply)
Having no OS preloaded on there does save a shitload of money.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:42, Reply)
You'd think but Dell pay £7.50 for windows per pc.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:42, Reply)
Sorry, I meant when you buy a PC with no OS on it, you save a shitload.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:43, Reply)
But then you have to buy yourself an OS, which most manufacturers would sell included at a lesser price.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:45, Reply)
I tend not to buy them, as I'll already have a cracked copy.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:49, Reply)
I tend to buy one every few years
but make sure it's OEM and I can install it on another PC if I upgrade.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:51, Reply)
This is probably a better approach than mine
I did buy XP OEM (I think), but I haven't bought any since.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:57, Reply)
What does OEM stand for?

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:58, Reply)
Original equipment manufacturer.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:59, Reply)
Oooooo, get you Blousie.
If I come round, can you tell me all about computer specifications while I wank over your tits?
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:01, Reply)
Why buy, when you could download one for free?
xkcd.com/456/
/answers own question
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:54, Reply)
Well, if you want to be able to use your PC for all the things most people use their PC's for, I don't think Linux is a good idea.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 15:57, Reply)
'Linux' always reminds me of the smelly boy from Peanuts.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:06, Reply)
Really? It always reminds me of Linus.
(sorry)
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:08, Reply)
HAHA.

(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:12, Reply)
it's fine for viewing porn and posting on facebook.
Actually come to think of it I could put Linux on my laptop without loosing anything, can't see that' I'd gain though, other than smugness.
(, Mon 19 Sep 2011, 16:09, Reply)

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