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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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The MP for vauxhall in London, in the wake of this helicopter crash has said "the river is the motorway for helicopters" What the Fuck does that mean?
I just had a guy bring the pub and, without introducing himself or anything just said "got any jobs mate?" and when I said no, no he just hung up. Chances are he's one of those benefit scroungers making no effort. Tell me a story about you applying for a job. Try and at least make it vaguely interesting.
Alt: what is your favourite?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:05,
181 replies,
latest was 12 years ago)
Alt: Performance starring Mick Jagger(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:08,
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I'd imagine he'd mean the helicopters are like cars and the river is like the road but the cars are floating in the air above the road and the road has a whale in it(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:08,
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Thanks glued. I can always rely on you. It's also a woman, not a man.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:10,
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Kate Hoey.The only pro fox hunting Labour MP IIRC.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:11,
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good knowledge. 10 points.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:11,
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If I met her I would say 'oi Kate Hoey, give us a blowie'(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:13,
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She looks like Peter Frampton(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:17,
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she looks like she's mid wink. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:19,
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I'm mid 'wink' myself IF YOU GET WHAT I MEAN AND I THINK YOU DO(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:20,
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I don't know, I'm pretty good at telling the differenceI almost never get my parent's genital mixed up
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glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:11,
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^^^thisflying visually, following the river and/or whales.
Some expert on the news said pilots had been told about the crane being there last week, but fog may have prevented the pilot seeing it.
Not 100% on this but aren't helicopters not allowed to fly in cloud or something? Was mentioned in that James May model glider programme I think?
(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)
The pilot was expecting to see one of these
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:18,
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I see, Report does say the pilot asked to divert to somewhere due to the weather, so very possibly.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:18,
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I think it means he is drunk.Alt. Our favourite what?
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:09,
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just your favourite please Jason. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:11,
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Oh, ok...
None of them, thanks. Send 'em all back.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:12,
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It means lots of helicopters fly down itso that they don't crash into cranes.
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Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:10,
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That's what I thought, but my local has a new barman, and he was always there before he worked there.To be fair he was a barman at the thearter next door.
(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:12, Reply)
If he was a barman nearby and popped in occasionally for a beer maybe, But of he was one of the sit at the bar and chat to the lads types then no. Not worth the risk. Drinkers loyalty is always to their mates.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:16,
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Absolutely no danger of them drinking all the profitsand giving free pints to their drinking buddies.
I therefore assume that you're a racist.
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Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:13,
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You're so much better that sleepy, dock and the othersI mean what the fuck is dock anyway?
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:16,
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'Doc' you blithering imbecile x(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:19,
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It's Doche's the only dwarf who got his PhD.
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:19,
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It means you can pull over onto the hard bank and have some dirty helicopter sex with that prozzie you picked up I once got an interview for a position at a bank and found myself completely unable to answer the question 'why do you want to work here?'
Sorry that wasn't interesting
Can I have a job?
Alt: EVERYTHING
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Theoban What of it, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:14,
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I think even the most pure woman in the world would put out if you flew her through london on your helicopter.(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:15, Reply)
I miss q. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:18,
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but why would you when you can have dirty prozzie sex?THINK chomples, c'mon, THINK
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Theoban What of it, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:19,
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I was told once 'if it floats, flies or fucks then rent it'.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:20,
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never buy a duck prostitute, is what you're saying then(
Theoban What of it, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:21,
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I dunno, I've heard duck fannies are like tiny labyrinths(
glued eel /questions/questionsyoudliketoask/post1648081, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:23,
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david bowie's lurking at the back playing with his balls?(
Theoban What of it, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:24,
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He said "david bowie's lurking at the back playing with his balls", sweetheart.(
Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:35,
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theyb are spiral shaped, some clockwise, others anticlockwisethat way only the mallards with the correctly twisting cocks can mate with them. Mallards get explosive erections as well...
scienceblogs.com/notrocketscience/2009/12/22/ballistic-penises-and-corkscrew-vaginas-the-sexual-battles/ NSFW if you are a duck
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:26,
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is that not the weirdest video you've ever seen?actually don't answer that
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:39,
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*something about please kill yourself*(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:40,
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LutonWP nicked it during the riots and moved it to Oxford.
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:27,
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Ahh, one of those set-Free Houses.(
JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:33,
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typo lols. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:32,
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It means that most helicopter pilots think that IFR and VFR mean I Follow Roads, and Visually Follow Roads.Except London has FUCKLOADS of roads which makes it too confusing for them, so Cockney helicopter pilots change it from Roads to River.
They just don't go South of it at night.
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stuj (^(^;;^)^) GO TEAM SPIDERS!(^(^;;^)^), Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:28,
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Sounds like they shouldn't go south of the river in the morning, either.(
Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:32,
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what does vfr really mean? You're a man of the skies, how hard would it be to not see the crane in the fog at that height?
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:36,
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Visual/Instrument Flight Rules.I learned that when I was in the military.
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Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:38,
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Surely for you it means, "Very Fast Retreat"?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:39,
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sorry about this thread guys. Also, the the lack of job stories makes me think you really are unemployed house whales pretending to be people.
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Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:37,
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I think getting a job is fundamentally pretty boring that's all(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:40,
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I have been successful in gaining every job I have ever applied for, I think.Nothing amusing or out of the ordinary has happened to me, or the people hiring me during the application process.
Soz.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:40,
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QOTW is not the place for honesty tangles(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:40,
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Well there was the time I worked as a talent scout for Select Models.But you don't want to hear about my hiring and firing experiences there...
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:42,
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We all got jobs at 14 and have worked here in the steel mill ever since(
Theoban What of it, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:41,
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How are you getting on with persuading Kroney to help you with your technical issues at home?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:44,
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I don't mean the whole 'servicing your wife' thing btw.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:45,
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i've given upthe french prick is too selfish to even pop over band plug in a wire or some shit
he's dead to me
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:45,
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I think we are all grateful for that.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:44,
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Nah' man, I just kick ass at what I do, so never had a problem finding a job.I once worked for complete and utter scum of a cab office though, if they firebombed the building with me and all the staff in it, even I would chawk that up for a win for humanity.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:45,
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I certainly am.Honestly, I come in here to escape from the tedious monotony of jobhunting, to find THIS.
Damn you, Windy Pig. Damn you to Hell.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:47,
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Your mum woke me up with her elephantine snoring.(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:50,
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That wasn't snoring. She was straining out a shit in to your cunt.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:52,
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You try getting a turd out of a prolapsed ringpiece. Oh actually, you know all about that already.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:56,
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awwwww, you're such a sweety. (
Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:45,
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I was once interviewed for an admin type job with the Filth.The two po-faced old biddies conducting the interview asked me what I would do if I was alone in the office with two policemen and they started telling sexist jokes.
In hindsight, I guess my answer of "I'd probably join in, I know some good jokes" was not what they were looking for.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:49,
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Google Glass might be coming out this year, if it is, I'm sooo getting one of those.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:50,
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HE SAID GOOGLE GLASS MIGHT BE COMING OUT THIS YEAR.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:54,
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Glasses with a little screen, a camera and a whole bunch of sensors.(
G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:55,
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There are loads of practical applications for it.- Have a little arrow pointing directions to where you want to go if you don't know the route.
- Have a little pop-up to tell you when a text-message / important email arrives.
- Take a photo/video without getting your phone up.
- See little floating statuses when you look up.
- See some piece of information in a crowded room that you don't want anyone else to see.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:00,
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- making you look like a flid(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:01,
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I donno man, it's pretty unobtrusive.www.google.co.uk/search?q=google+glasses&aq=0&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=tqT2UOPDB-uW0QXso4HgBg&biw=1529&bih=866&sei=t6T2ULH7Ia-a1AXhhIH4AQ
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:01,
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But more obtrusive than those bluetooth headsetsthat makes everybody look at you and think "Christ, what a cunt" if you wear them out in public.
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Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:04,
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They tend to make me think'Is that bloke talking to himself? What a nutter'
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:08,
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Not as bad as they could be, I suppose.Chompy will get one so he can play 'Star Trek' with his 'gaming' pals.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:05,
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My housemate started a facebook group called "The Milton Keynes boardgame club" last night.Classy eh?
(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:16, Reply)
No not classy, the other thing...fucking tragic (
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:18,
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To be honest I don't see a problem with getting some beer and wine and playing a board game with your mates on the weekend.Cheaper than the pub, more fun than watching a film and it start hilarious arguments.
(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:26, Reply)
I only like Scrabble and Escape from Colditz.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:27,
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Settlers of Catan is good.Escape from Colditz does the rounds as does Axis vs Allies, but that takes like a whole day.
(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:29, Reply)
There is a Noggin the Nog game but it's super rareBeen trying to get it for my kid and cannot find it anywhere.
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:30,
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Looks like it's not been made for 10 years, unless you find it at a car boot, you'll be lucky to ever be able to buy that.(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:35, Reply)
Although, printer card and some time and you can make it using thesewww.smallfilms.co.uk/noggin/games.htm
(, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:39, Reply)
I like how he mentioned this to you in the hope that you would be able to find something on the internet for him.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:40,
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We quite often do boardgames or cardgames of an eveningYour own booze, you can smoke indoors, you can schmoke indoors...
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The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:40,
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Tim Cook might have a bit more to say about it.Apple might come up with a new watch this year that'll be pretty cool.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:56,
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I have decided I hate my iPhone 5 and want a Nexus 4.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 12:57,
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sounds like a job for...PHONE CHAT(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:00,
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I'll be honest, I ain't 100% behind my iphone 5, the reception is well choppy, but it could be because i'm running beta software.I love the look of Umbunto Mobile, that looks like the next big thing.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:01,
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GOD HE'S SO THICK NO WONDER EVERYONE HATES HIM(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:07,
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I'M SORRY THAT I CAN'T QUITE REMEMBER A TWENTY YEAR OLD ADVERT(
Kroney, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:08,
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They drink it in the Congo - that's what I heard, anyway.(
Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:07,
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I heard an hippo took an apricot, a guava and a mango(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:08,
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+ stuffed them up your mum's prolapsed anus(
b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:12,
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before shitting them in to your cunt.(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:13,
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PAGING JEFFwww.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-21011778
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Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:13,
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mr b3th has just sung me the song of 'I was right'with two extended choruses of 'you're obviously an idiot' and 'your friends agree with me'.
I truly am WTN. I shall go away and think about what I've done.
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b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 16 Jan 2013, 13:40,
Reply)
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