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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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long thread is long
what makes you nervous or fearful? do you have any crazy superstitions?

alt: what do you do if you can't sleep? yeah yeah, and after that?

altalt: what word should all non-english speaking people be taught?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:09, 218 replies, latest was 13 years ago)
I have a weird superstition about avoiding being the first to respond to a new thread.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:11, Reply)
Ah shit!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:11, Reply)
like being the first person to be buried in a new graveyard?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)
Oh no, I'd be fine with that.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)
hahahahaha
i heard that it was because the devil will take the first soul buried there. so i googled it.

death.findyourfate.com/superstitions-graves.html

this claims that being the first to be buried there is "unlucky". you're fucking DEAD. how much more unlucky can you get?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:28, Reply)
You could be Asian.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)
or muslim and end up with 42 virgins from on here
*shudders*
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:38, Reply)
no greggs hat chat bebbeh

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:39, Reply)
Thta'd be like an eternal version of bursting the foil seal on your coffee jar

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:27, Reply)
are you talking about anal sex?
because it sounds like you are talking about anal sex.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:28, Reply)
*stores euphemism for later use*

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:31, Reply)
Nothing specifically makes me nervous
alt: I can always sleep

altalt: gunt
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)
*gunt high-fives*

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:18, Reply)
more of a low slap

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:20, Reply)
Alt: I shove her and tell her to stop snoring.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)

er im
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)
He doesn't snore.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)
its not so much a superstition but:
I do greet magpies, its like an automatic response
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:15, Reply)
That is a superstition and we all now know that you are some kind of idiot
hth xx
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:16, Reply)
It does...
thx bbz
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:18, Reply)
Alt:
I used to have bad insomnia, to this end I got a prescription for Nitrazipam which were great after a pint or two.

alt alt Tmesis
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:17, Reply)
Heights make me nervous
I climbed up the lighthouse down at the coast with the kids and nearly shit myself at the top

Alt:
Think about stuff that needs sorted out

AltAlt:
GUNT
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:18, Reply)
Oh yeah I shit myself dealing with heights
Went up a tower once, only got to the top on me hands and knees. Such a massive pussy, me. Innit.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:47, Reply)
haha, "lighthouse"
like those are real
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
im afraid of the dark, generally
Especially now that im babysitting, its in the middle of the woods, creeps me out at night
alt usually toss and turn, weep a bit
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:18, Reply)

now that im babysitting, its in the middle of the woods, creeps me out at night when I'm in a park
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:21, Reply)
don't you like toast?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)
Well I find it preferable to seeing a ghost.
That's the sight I fear the most, you see?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:27, Reply)
oh, life

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:28, Reply)
It's not the dark you are afraid of, it's the murderers, creepy clowns, mutant zombies and milton Keynes rapists hiding IN the dark that scare you.
hth xx
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:21, Reply)
be fair
the dark helps some people get laid
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)
if you taste shit you've gone 1 fold to far

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:26, Reply)

laid raped, mudered, robbed, made into a human handbag
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:30, Reply)
2013 spring/summer's must have accessory

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:33, Reply)
earring made from actual ears!!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)
flesh tunnels made from actual flesh!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:38, Reply)
Heights
Bumrape (lack thereof)
Ballroom competitions
Badmons
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:19, Reply)
*glares*

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:21, Reply)
*soils pantaloons*

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)
AltAlt: Fellatio
Assuming they're fit
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:22, Reply)
how do you expect them to say that with their mouths full?
or are you saying they'd have plenty of room left?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:24, Reply)
I can easily speak whilst flossing

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)
If they can't pass that test
they don't get to live here
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:28, Reply)
I donno if it's a good idea me sayin' on here 'cus people will post pictures of it and I'll never be able to come back.
I can only sleep when I'm not supposed too.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)
Poor Kronely, forever alone aside from the moths in his mind

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:25, Reply)
hahaha i forgot about the Moths

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:26, Reply)
is it cheese

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:28, Reply)
probably Polo mints
or anything else that has a laxative effect
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:29, Reply)
I aint finished yet...
But you could be on to something
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:30, Reply)
is it spiders

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:29, Reply)
is it tramps

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:29, Reply)
is it monkeys

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:29, Reply)
is it gypsy rose lee

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:29, Reply)
is it gifeltefish

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:29, Reply)
is it little ring pulls on cans of Tab

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:30, Reply)
is it fibre

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:30, Reply)
is it having to touch yourself every time you post?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:32, Reply)
leave him alone, he's just pushing the turtle head back in

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:35, Reply)
in that case
yourself cloth
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)
using a compass

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:52, Reply)
i reckon it's CLOWNS

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:40, Reply)
I reckon it's Masons

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:54, Reply)
Burr

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
altalt: clopper

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:26, Reply)
Fuck this shit.
CP and awaaaaaaay.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:30, Reply)
Crazy superstition I inherited from my mum
"See a penny pick it up, all day long you'll have good luck" only works if the penny is heads up, so if it's tails up I turn it over and leave it for the next person.

I am aware this is weird.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:31, Reply)

5.9.83.79/questions/offtopic/post1877989
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:31, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1838661
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:37, Reply)
if this is bullying I'm going to be upset...

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:41, Reply)
DAMN YOU YOU FOPPISH FRENCH FUCK!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:41, Reply)
:D
This is doubly amusing because as you have to copy/paste they don't turn purple to tell you they've been clicked on already.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:45, Reply)
imma not clickin dis
but imma hopin it's i love burgers
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:48, Reply)
That's way beyond Nakers' IT knowledge level anyway

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:48, Reply)
I've made a note of the post number

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:50, Reply)
Good job there haven't been loads of people calling you names then!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:51, Reply)
where?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:52, Reply)
nothing, no, get out of bed and have a cup of coffee, shitcunt

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:33, Reply)
next thread please

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:35, Reply)
get the parrot to do one

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:40, Reply)
he's busy chewing a plastic bottle top to shreds

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:45, Reply)
POIDH

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:47, Reply)
OK

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:48, Reply)
Why don't you shit down into your coffee?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:35, Reply)
d00d
srsly
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:46, Reply)
I'm frightened of breasts

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:33, Reply)
Alt: shout out 'oi, stop pissing on the floor you fucking savage'
Altalt: DEPORTATION
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:38, Reply)
altalt: BENEFITS

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:39, Reply)
I am in SUCH a good mood Lighty.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:50, Reply)
I ate too much cake and now feel a bit sick :(

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:55, Reply)
\o/
Good-oh.

I do fancy trying those burgers at the Sebright Arms at some point very soon.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
You all know I'm afraid of moths and butterflies
but that also extends to all manner of flying insects. Even the tiny little wee ones. I'm pathetic.

I don't walk on clusters of three drains, despite drains being utterly incapable of affecting my fortune.

alt: drink until i pass out

atalt: ballbag
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:39, Reply)
what about greenfly?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:40, Reply)
ok, I'm not THAT pathetic.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:45, Reply)
what about waking up to find 100 greenflies all crawling on your face and stuck in your beard?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:47, Reply)
+ anal

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:49, Reply)
oh man, those anal greenfly are so delightfully itchy

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:50, Reply)
After that, I'd probably find them scary.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:52, Reply)
I know someone who woke up with a MASSIVE cockroach on his face...he screamed like a little girl

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:53, Reply)
strikethrough roach
lulz
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:54, Reply)
i knew someone who when at the school before the one we were at woke up because a strange boy was pushing his penis in the chaps ear.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
I am also aware of this story
it wasnt a school in essex was it?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:57, Reply)
Nah, prep school in Oxford. The victim moved onto the same public school as me

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:59, Reply)
why did you do that?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:57, Reply)
if you had a penis you've put it in all sorts of things

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:59, Reply)
BEING ALIVE
alt: I usually get angry at not being able to sleep which stops me from sleeping so I get up and do something else

altalt: GUNT
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:46, Reply)
yes but what else?
WHAT ELSE? WE NEED TO KNOW, WHAT IS THIS BIG SECRET THING YOU DO IN THE DEAD OF NIGHT
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:48, Reply)
Dunno anyfink innit

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:49, Reply)
why won't you come clean about this?
what are you hiding from us?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:49, Reply)
I'm really not sure about this guy, your highness.
He's up to something
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:51, Reply)
he's being properly fucking evasive about it

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:51, Reply)
look I don't appreciate this prying into my secret business
I don't ask you about your budgie do I?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:52, Reply)
blue crowned conure

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:53, Reply)
aratinga acuticaudata

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:54, Reply)
psatticus imaginarius

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
oh yeah, right, the imaginary parrot thing, are we still doing that?
yeah

ok then

...

yeah, soz, don't know where to take that joke

other than behind a barn with a shotgun
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:58, Reply)
if anyone has any suggestions on how to make that joke funny again then I'd love to hear them though

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:03, Reply)
you could always staple your cock a few times and then post pictures of that instead?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:06, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=t6RLuUnRbIM
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:13, Reply)
real or imaginary that shit is cute
i saw no staples though
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:23, Reply)
you did see a cock though
a big green one
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:30, Reply)
oh yeah
i liked that video
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:31, Reply)
Momo is the best bird
www.youtube.com/watch?v=E-gG1jBsIwI
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:49, Reply)
the innocent have nothing to fear
and all Momo facts are fully disclosed under the freedom of information act
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:53, Reply)
Alright fine
I get up and watch telly usually or read a book
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
HAPPY NOW?
MY SECRET SHAME, EXPOSED
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
well ok then

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:56, Reply)
which book?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:57, Reply)
Reading Rebus books at the moment
Just finished Mortal Causes
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:58, Reply)
yeah, I don't care, soz

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:59, Reply)
You're my favourite

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:00, Reply)
yeah, I don't care, soz

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:04, Reply)
Mwah xxx

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:05, Reply)
I don't think this is the full story.
There's something you're not telling us.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:00, Reply)
There's loads I'm not telling you shower
International man of mystery innit
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:01, Reply)
you just called theoban a wanker
we all saw it
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:49, Reply)
wanker

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 16:49, Reply)
don't call me a wanker swipe lady
I ehn't done owt to you
Don't start all bullying on me just cos you a high powered lawyer and I'm a pillock on the internet
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:00, Reply)
I'm starting to wonder whether the REAL wanker here is Swipe herself.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:03, Reply)
Ol Lady Onan herself?
No way, can't be
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:04, Reply)
Onan the Bra-barian MORE LIKE!!!!! GEDDIT?????

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:07, Reply)
i've had worse

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:05, Reply)
sorry
i just wanted to fit in with the cool kidz
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:04, Reply)
Actually the only thing i really make me nervous is something happening to baby badmons

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:03, Reply)
why, in case they blame you for smothering it?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:05, Reply)
This is about Al's level of humour, I can only assume that you are therefore a fat, bald cunt

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:07, Reply)
whoa
fat and bald is one thing. but comparing me to AL??

too far man. too far.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:07, Reply)
soz

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:09, Reply)
that's ok
i'll defend you when they haul you away for smothering it with your anal beard of love
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:10, Reply)
I take that back i'm not sorry at all you horrid little Al-a-like

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:11, Reply)
:))))))))))))

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:11, Reply)
I just spoke to my kid and I am over the pissing moon about it.
/life story
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:06, Reply)
:))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))))

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:07, Reply)
She's as excited as me about Sunday
CHRISTMAS IS BACK ON WOOOOOOOOO
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:08, Reply)
i wish i could have Christmas in march

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:09, Reply)
You can.
No one is keeping your kid from you.
Have Christmas three times a week, if you want.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:21, Reply)
good
and the fucking evil bitch will see how excited she is. maybe she will learn that her child is a person with her own loves and life, NOT A PAWN.

sorry, the last bit was shouted by the pig that just flew past...
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:11, Reply)
Probably a good job you don't do family law eh?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:13, Reply)
i am not known for my sympathy

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:21, Reply)
There's something really fucking weird going on.
I've had two rational, logical emails from her today - I think someone's had a fucking word and in some crazy twist of fate she's listened.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:14, Reply)
Yeah, i threatened to pound her stupid face in
no one fucks with friends of Badmons Dukaz!
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:16, Reply)
YESSSSSS

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:17, Reply)

threatened to pound her stupid face in am a bent spastic.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:18, Reply)
Maybe her solicitor's said to her
"You've been going through lawyers like jamrags. This is because you're onto a loser. You are not looking sane. If you carry on like this you will lose your child."

We can but hope.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:17, Reply)

said to her
"You've been going through lawyers like jamrags. This is because you're onto a loser. You are not looking sane. If you carry on like this you will lose your child."

We can but hope.
written them for her
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:21, Reply)
Oh right, yeah.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:24, Reply)
Hmmmm

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:33, Reply)
i would say it's 90% likely!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:34, Reply)
I know her BF has a barrister mate, possibly they've had a hand in it.
The thing is the emails are really personal, they read like her own words which the letters she's been sending to my solicitor have not.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:36, Reply)
Possibly on some new medication.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:37, Reply)
i do that all the time
client writes it, i then rewrite it, so that it doesn't sound legalistic, but has been pruned!
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:39, Reply)
The way it reads to me, there's been a major reality hit home.
I might be wrong - maybe it's just my kid saying she misses me - but I think it's dawned on her that she's about to look like a massive cunt in front of a court. I am still extremely suspicious.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:50, Reply)
Good stuff
I picked the offspring up from nursery yesterday and when she saw me squealed with excitement and ran full pace across the room with her arms in the air for a hug.

best part of my day :)
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:08, Reply)
it's exactly how i pictured you in the office with the cake earlier

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:11, Reply)
There isn't a feeling like it in the world.

Except maybe when you complete a dangerwank in the cafe in Ikea, Edmonton.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:12, Reply)
I know, i loves it I do

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:15, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1869971
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:15, Reply)
this is a different link...

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:16, Reply)
Fantastic innit.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:14, Reply)
Fearful: not having any money. Something bad happening to my daughter
Altalt: Shed.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:07, Reply)
Are you putting money ahead of your daughter?
for shame Battered, for shame.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:10, Reply)
Oops. Nope. Reads like that though!

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:11, Reply)
Interesting
www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/booknews/9883106/Museums-hidden-treasures.html
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:13, Reply)
Dear Diary,
Today I learned that the word "interesting" can also mean "shit boring", imagine my surprise!
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:20, Reply)
I didn't know you had a blog diary
no wait, yeah I do, it's full of mental
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:21, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1864992
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:22, Reply)
I'm not clicking these any more

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:24, Reply)
You should click that one though.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:26, Reply)
are you saying I'm Frank?

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:26, Reply)
you Kroney, whomever

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:28, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1869971
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:30, Reply)
AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:30, Reply)
lololol

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:35, Reply)
if you don't stop bullying nakers
i'll post a moth grot shot
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:39, Reply)
Post one anyway.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:40, Reply)
Haha look at Nakers
having to get a girl to fight his battles for him. What a poofter.
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:41, Reply)
YEAH!
Are you charging me for this?
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:44, Reply)
lol

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:26, Reply)
no.

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:28, Reply)
altalt
'sorry'

it's the word the english are most famous for
(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:18, Reply)
Not in India it's not - that's 'Amritsar'

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:18, Reply)
I did a home time thread

(, Wed 27 Feb 2013, 17:45, Reply)

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