Morning.
I don't feel anywhere near as bad as I should for some reason. When was the last time you got away with something you really shouldn't have?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:00, 180 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

You do realise that this will lead to Kroneys speeding tale once again
Why should you feel bad this morning?
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:03, Reply)

Monged off his tits last night, probly.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:06, Reply)

He may have set his Ex. up as a drug dealer and just happened to have a samurai sword to hand

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:10, Reply)

Joss Stone isn't his missus?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:15, Reply)

When I beheaded a drug dealer with a samurai sword.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:10, Reply)

Mindpiss

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:11, Reply)

I had a hash brown on my plate
but as it was under the toast the lady at the till didn't charge me the 12p. I feel guilty about it every day.
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:20, Reply)

This is worse than anything Barryfromeastenders ever did. You should feel ashamed PJ. ASHAMED.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:24, Reply)

I may have to kill myself

( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:25, Reply)

Stunned and Jeff will take care of that.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:27, Reply)

I may very well be meeting MrDogFucker in 2 short weeks

( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:28, Reply)

The challenge when meeting Jeff is to see if you can beat the record he and I set; 12 pints in 12 pubs by 12am.
Others have tried. None have succeeded.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:29, Reply)

You cheated by driving to each pub

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:30, Reply)

That's the good thing about Brizzle; lots and lots of pubs within walking distance of each other.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:32, Reply)

sounds like York

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:33, Reply)

Or any other large town/city just saying

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:34, Reply)

Not Coventry :(

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:36, Reply)

troo
But York is famed for its large number of pubs. A lot of them are shit tho.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:36, Reply)

i thought halifax had more pubs per square mile than anywhere else in the uk?
although most of them are shut now
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:44, Reply)

Others may have tried
but I won't be. I have a train to pastyland the next moring
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:49, Reply)

Poofter.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:56, Reply)

I'll have to be in bed by 11
Tell you what I'll make up for it by having 13 pints in 13 pubs before 11pm
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:57, Reply)

Good lad.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:58, Reply)

Since I've completed both the Monopoly and the Circle line pub crawls
The Circle line one twice

then I can safely say "done"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:31, Reply)

It is the honourable thing you can do.
Remember: it's down the tracks, not across the road.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:28, Reply)

I'd rather do something dramatic
You know like the cheese wire round neck bungee cord superglue your hands to your ears thing so you are left swinging with your decapitated head in your hands. Why people don't do this all the time I don't know, it would be totally amazing.
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:30, Reply)

you wouldn't be swinging, though, would you? Your head would have come off, leaving you unattached to anything.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:45, Reply)

Thats where the bungee cord comes in
LEARN TO READ LIC!
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:46, Reply)

Driving to work today I wore my sunglasses
In honour of our fallen brother Barryfromeastenders

In honour of our fallen brother Barryfromeastenders

Because the sun was in my eyes TRUSTORY
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:27, Reply)

Who is Ory? and Why should I trust them?

( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:28, Reply)

I had a dream last night that my mum was dead and I was going to die soon
and it dawned on me that its fucking boring when people talk about their dreams.
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:26, Reply)

Martin Luther-king Jnrs latest rousing speach wasn't quiteZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:28, Reply)

Morning.
I never get away with anything, my face always betrays the truth.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:26, Reply)

Did anyone else forget to have their post vasectomy check done because I did!
I could still be fertile. But don't worry kids, I spunked up in a pot and posted it through the doctors letter box this morning. I forgot the fill in the label on the pot but I did wrap a note around it with my name and date of birth so hopefully they will work it out, either that or call the police.
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:27, Reply)

So your story is you had a wank this morning?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:28, Reply)

Yes, in to a pot
the hardest part was finding pictures of YM online
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:47, Reply)

You should have gazzed one of us - there are loads available.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:04, Reply)

Ultra wide-angle lenses are pretty rare.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:05, Reply)

I haven't had a vasectomy
but I do post pots of my semen to people anonymously.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:31, Reply)

Tangy

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:45, Reply)

I break into people's houses
and anonymously give them vasectomies.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:46, Reply)

I thought I woke with less pubic hair and more scars than usual.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:05, Reply)

alright yo
I have got away with a hell of a lot in my time.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:32, Reply)

I seem to have got away without a hangover this morning, which is nice
However, my guts are fucking awful this morning, had to leave my desk after dropping a nasty one before.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:44, Reply)

Alright Monty?
What was it you got away with then?
( Peej, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:48, Reply)

I snuck into some random house and gave the occupant a vasectomy.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 8:57, Reply)

WITHASPOON !!1111!!

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:02, Reply)

Real answer: I got absolutely wankered yesterday and by rights should be in pieces this morning.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:08, Reply)

I was feeling quite pissed by 8pm, mind you, Stunned & I had started at 3.30...

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:12, Reply)

Hey London people
I'm going to the Olympia on Monday.
Is there anywhere decent to drink near there, or am I better off heading back into the centre?
Your suggestions/abuse please.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:09, Reply)

It's fucking gash round there.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:11, Reply)

Not only is there nowhere to get a drink
it's also really tricky to get to in the first place.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:11, Reply)

Yeah that District Line is really hard to find and in no way runs all the way from Richmond to Barking.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:12, Reply)

Yes Monty, but not many trains actually go to Olympia AKSHERLLY!!!!!
AND ITS THEFT AKSHERLLY!!!!!
(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:14, Reply)

You can walk it from Earls Court
AQQU'TCH'E'WHIRLLY
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:15, Reply)

I NO THAT AKSHERLLLY!!!!!!!
But my point was that it's a bit of a trek. There is a pub on the way though. It looked a bit shit though.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:16, Reply)

Can you two just come to some sort of agreement as to how I'm going to get there please?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:17, Reply)

Don't care, soz

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:38, Reply)

PS I'm very worried about you Al
www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2013/04/130403200156.htm
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:17, Reply)

I can't believe that actually go published
it's such a bollocks conclusion.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:39, Reply)

...you hope, YA BALDY BASTAD

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:49, Reply)

It's a crap area to drinking in

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:12, Reply)

Yeah, this is what I was expecting.
Any recommendations for good places to drink, not too far from Euston?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:16, Reply)

Yes, the lesbian pub we went to on the other side of the road.

(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:17, Reply)

Can you narrow it down a bit?
Google doesn't seem to be much help: www.google.co.uk/search?q=lesbian+pub+on+the+other+side+of+the+road+from+euston&rls=com.microsoft:en-GB:IE-Address&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid=ie7&rlz=1I7GGHP_en-GBGB442&redir_esc=&ei=yoheUY3YBILx4QTlh4CgCw
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:19, Reply)

Yeah, it's on the other side of teh road
and it's been used before as a B4SH venue.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:20, Reply)

Oh THAT lesbian pub on the other side of the road.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:22, Reply)

"The Swan with two Ladydads"

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:26, Reply)

Try using www.beerintheevening.com
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:19, Reply)

Yes, but there are quite a lot of pubs in London, it would be far simpler to get a recommendation from you lot.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:23, Reply)

i know at least three really shit pubs near there

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:24, Reply)

Cool cheers m8
I'll gaz you about a secret bash, yeah?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:26, Reply)

yeah always left out me, Dozer had a secret bash in oneills opposite kings cross only last week and no one else was invited :((

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:27, Reply)

That seems a bit shit, put in rotherham, top rated pub has been shut for over a decade

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:28, Reply)

The Bree Louise is just round the corner, and meant to be excellent

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Looks pretty good
Thanks AA
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Hey does anyone know if I stay in a hotel in Shoreditch will I get stabbed I heard londoners like to stab thanks for answering xx love you all

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:16, Reply)

They hate Irish round that way and they're going to cut you into tiny pieces.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:16, Reply)

Cool I could do with losing some weight

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:18, Reply)

I live round there.
The worst you'll get is an unexpected vasectomy.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:18, Reply)

The womenfolk of the world would sigh in relief at the news that none of them would have to carry my demon child

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:19, Reply)

Which hotel?
I'm guessing either the Holiday Inn on Old St or the RE on Hackney Rd?
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:34, Reply)

Holday Inn I think

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:37, Reply)

If you don't meet me for a pint I shall be frightfully hurt, seeing as that is my 'manor', as we cockneys say.
I'd probably be too upset to eat chicken ever again.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:44, Reply)

Yeah man I'm TOTES UPSO for that
In fact I made a calendar thing for being over in London but it's super vague and possibly on the wrong date and everything

ORGANISED
( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:48, Reply)

YESSSSSSS

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Every day my serfs fail to rise up and overthrow me, despite me being a despot and the worst kind of gluttonous king

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:10, Reply)

I thought Chicken Thursday was a rousing success.
Today seems a little flat in comparison.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:11, Reply)

Y'know I was thinking the same thing
Woke up this morning, felt like something was missing. Couldn't put my finger on it until you mentioned it
( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:13, Reply)

Worst blues song ever.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:21, Reply)

WOAHAHAHAAH I GOT THE CHICKEN THURSDAY BLUES
COS TODAY AIN'T CHICKEN THURSDAY ANYMORE AND THAT DAY IS PRETTY GOOD IF YOU ASK ME SORRY IF YOU DISAGREE BUT I QUITE LIKE IT
WOAHAHAHAHAH THE CHICKEN THURSDAY BLUES
( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:22, Reply)

Better.
Inscription on a blues player's tombstone.

"Din't wake up this morning' "
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:24, Reply)

Eat that chicken
www.youtube.com/watch?v=ovaY1KlQRi4
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:30, Reply)

Alabama 3's less succeszzzzzzzz

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:32, Reply)

badger? you ok? oh god badger! DON'T GO INTO THE LIGHT, STAY WITH US

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:33, Reply)

But it's beautiful...... so pretty....

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:35, Reply)

Get off the track, there's a train coming!!!

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:36, Reply)

woah. close.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:41, Reply)

Second only to Threadrush Thursday.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:19, Reply)

Has anyone been watching "It's Kevin"
I like it, it's sort of quietly funny.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:28, Reply)

Is this about your new television?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:32, Reply)

No, I wasn't talking about my new television. If I was talking about my NEW television you would know I was talking about my NEW TELEVISION

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:33, Reply)

I watched one of them, and I thought it was all mildly amusing at best,
with the exception of one sketch which was the audio recording of the Sex Pistols on the Bill Grundy Show where he'd reenacted it with Amish people. That was fucking hilarious.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:33, Reply)

I quite like his Hitler.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:34, Reply)

I haven't

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:34, Reply)

I can dismiss other things if you like too

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:34, Reply)

Please dismiss George osbourns car being photographed parked in a disabled bay ty xxx

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:37, Reply)

what, because we somehow needed more evidence he's an awful cunt?
Anyway, his cuntiness is a mere sideline. It's the fact he's chancellor and wouldn't recognise economics if it bent him over a table and fucked him up the arse that's the issue.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:40, Reply)

it's not like disabled people ever use those bays in the first instance, stop riding him like a horse

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:42, Reply)

I'm not, I don't care where he parks. It's irrelevant to his ability to do his job.
His total inability to do his job is, however, relevant to his ability to do his job.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:44, Reply)

your beef is wiv the treasury then innit, George is only their mindless marionette

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:46, Reply)

not at all.
The opposite. Most chancellors, even those economically qualified and skilled, take their advice from the Treasury. Osborne refuses to on a number of key issues because "he and the conservative party know better"

So not only can he, economically, not find his arse with both hands, but he refuses to take advice from the people who are specifically employed and ideally skilled to offer him an arse-map and some hand sat-navs.

It's a big part of the reason my missus chose to leave the treasu.... but I'm not supposed to talk about that
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:50, Reply)

well yer, there has to be some 'steerage' on where they're going. But if George wholesale refused to follow their lead there'd bee a lot more leaks on what a fucking prick he is

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:52, Reply)

How many leaks do you need?
Remember the budget before last?
(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:53, Reply)

What're you, some kind of Welsh vegetable dealer now are you?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:55, Reply)

IM SORRY BUT I DONT READ THE LIES IN THE GUARDIAN

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:58, Reply)

You don't need to leak what is common knowledge.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:54, Reply)

I'd just like to leak that you are a fucking WOMAD Kershaw yurt prick.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:55, Reply)

www.b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1923842
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Essentially the treasury have to do what they are told
so, Osborne and his team say what they want. The treasury tell them it's idiotic. They ask for it anyway, and the treasury have to work out a way to do it.

Most chancellors defer to the treasury on most things, except key pre-election promises, but obviously the treasury are geared up for that, as in the run-up to elections they work out how the key policies of all the parties would work, just in case they get elected.

Osborne defers on very little, but the treasury's hands are essentially tied. Ultimate decision rests with the chancellor, which is why having a chancellor who is both an economic idiot and unspeakably arrogant is a really, really, fucking bad idea. The fact he's Tory is really neither here nor there, this is apolitical. It's the fact he's George Osborne that is the major problem.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:58, Reply)

yeah, but he runs a very successful family business. he's got a proven track record, he's not just a career prick in the treasury

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:03, Reply)

yeah but he's just saved us from a triple dip recession so it's all good yeah?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:54, Reply)

So he's so incompetent it's taken him three goes to massage the figures so they're no longer negative?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:58, Reply)

would you rather someone gave up at the first sign of trouble?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:01, Reply)

I'd prefer him to think further than the next election
but no politician ever does that, or what's in the country's best interests.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:05, Reply)

To be fair, he doesn't massage the figures so much as ignores them.
The figures are produced independently.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:03, Reply)

To be even fairer, shut up, no-one cares about your worthless vegetarian opinons

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:09, Reply)

Gaz me for recipe tips, yeah?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:11, Reply)

Put on a black coat and go and lie on the M4 at midnight, yeah?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:13, Reply)

There's been lots of talk about him activley ignoring treasury advice.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:50, Reply)

NO NO GEORGE IS ACTING ALONE
JUST LIKE WHEN TONY BLIAR DECLARED WAR ALL ON HIS OWN WITHOUT ANY APPROVAL OF ANYONE JUST HIM IT WAS HIM.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:51, Reply)

They get all the best parking

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:45, Reply)

i've paid for a few bays and have to watch em being used by remarkably well abled people for like all of teh time

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:48, Reply)

Yeah you're like Atos with your assessment of their disabilities though, right?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:50, Reply)

I'm not really expecting them to roll out of the car and crawl up the road using ropes and crampons.
But it's not that difficult to qualify for a council blue badge, especially with the majority of people on the sick not really qualifying in any real sense. Aaah my back, being a good entry point.
Most of the badges are also used by family members with the qualifying person not being in attendance.
This is just personal experience mind, from the bays that I've had to pay for.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Waaah yellow paint is soooo expensive waaahhh
man up
(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:57, Reply)

Nah this is bays innit, you can park for three hours on the single and double lines
its not for me but people who genuinely need em, but cant because of teh 90% of pricks with unwarranted badges. Such as people in vans and stuff like that.
( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:01, Reply)

Al is such a cunt

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:04, Reply)

I had been wondering why my mirrors had been kicked off :((

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:05, Reply)

disabled shouldn't even be allowed to drive anyway, too dangerous

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:51, Reply)

they're not really disabled Ben, I'm sorry to break this news to you

( Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:57, Reply)

:-O

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Yeah I didn't care about that, his driver will get a bollocking/poss sacked, case closed
Gideon's an awful cunt but that's a separate issue
( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:42, Reply)

He wasn't driving though so not really his fault is it?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Maybe he was a little tired and meant to park 20 miles away.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:44, Reply)

Yeah maybe!

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:45, Reply)

Being chancellor does not make him blind.
"erm, mate, you've parked my car in a disabled space. best move it, eh?"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:45, Reply)

"The Mirror are going to have a field day"

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:46, Reply)

"imagine if you were a labour politician
you'd be able to hear the Mail journalists ejaculating into their undergarments from here"
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Maybe Gideon said something prick like to his driver.
And this was the drivers revenge.
(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:52, Reply)

to get himself disciplined?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:53, Reply)

To be honest, with the nonsense he was on about yesterday with the Philpott stuff, I'm perfectly fine with a Mirror fitup today

( Theoban What of it, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:59, Reply)

I enjoyed the one I saw.
Although I wasn't convinced it would go a whole series.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:43, Reply)

The one with (Close personal friend) Adam Buxton in was good.

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:47, Reply)

I got away with TWO speeding infractions. Two!
Totes because of my amazeballs driving skillZ!!!
( Kroney, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Don't you mean the incompitance of the system?

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:48, Reply)

Ironic spelling lolz

( Kroney, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Or your incompetence at spelling

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:52, Reply)

BING BONG, IRONY CHECK IN AISLE FOUR PLEASE

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:59, Reply)

YESSIR MISSER BRITASSS

(Bazongaloid, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:13, Reply)

haha

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:13, Reply)

No, cos speedos over-read and the police allow 10% as well.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:52, Reply)

And if you suck on a teaspoon then that knocks off 5%

(PsychoChomp, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:53, Reply)

No, that lowers breathalyser readings by half.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:55, Reply)

It also helps if you're driving a big Merc and in Poland

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:13, Reply)

*FACEPALMS*
I WARNED YOU MONTS, But did you listen to me.....

Did you fuck now look what has happened
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:12, Reply)

You want to watch your back, son.
I'm a wanted man in two counties.
( Kroney, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:15, Reply)

Have you found your new ride yet?
I saw a wicked Lancia Integra for sale the other day
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:17, Reply)

Honda Integra, or Lancia Integrale?
The two are easily confused.
( Kroney, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:18, Reply)

Whoops the second
the Honda can go suck donkey balls
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:23, Reply)

My boss has an Integrale.
The steering wheel's on the wrong side, leading to some *hilarious* 'I got into the driver's seat' adventures.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:23, Reply)

I was taken around part of a rally track in one in the early 90's
That scared the fuck out of me
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:25, Reply)

I also could feel a lot worse this morning
however I just got an extra sausage in my Full English because I had to wait for the beans. As if not being at my desk for an extra 5 minutes had somehow made me unhappy.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Pretty sure this is gay slang

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 9:53, Reply)

Pretty sure you'd be right about that seeing as you talk gay slang all day fucking long so you're a fucking expert.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:05, Reply)

What I'm saying here is that you yourself are gay, in case I haven't made that clear.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Look, are you going to meet me on Hampstead Heath or what?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Sure, it's a five minute walk from Olympia.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:10, Reply)

Bloody hell! What happened yesterday?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:27, Reply)

Himjim introduced him to their new line of buttplugs

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 5 Apr 2013, 10:32, Reply)