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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Bucket list
what do you really want to do that you never have? I'd love to do some freefall and get a ride in a two man spitfire and drive an F1 car etc etc

alt: 50 mins till hime time!
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:10, 187 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
I want to log in here one day to hear the news that you died in a hilarious way and spend the whole day mocking your memory.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)
well that's not very nice is it

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)
Ideally you would have died in a supermarket. Or some sort of industrial email printing accident.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)
do you want my daughter to grow up without father?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:13, Reply)
Your wife will remarry.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:13, Reply)
oh, good. i'd hate for her to be alone

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:15, Reply)
What's she look like, mate?
It'll be awkward and everything, but if you cark it I'll totes be your bro and smash one up it.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:17, Reply)
you're a good friend, similar sentiments for you and OG
i'll even give your housemate one as well, then raid her bank account
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:18, Reply)
hang on
those can't be similar sentiments. because your proposal means that your wife has to cark it as well as kroney.

would they have died together in some tragic square car-related incident?
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:23, Reply)
look, I don't do deatils
I leave that to minions
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:26, Reply)
if killing your wife and kroney is a "detail"
what the fuck is at the top of your to-do list!?
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:29, Reply)
world domination

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
She doesn't currently have a bank account, but otherwise go for your life.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:25, Reply)
lol, 3rd world fat mate

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:26, Reply)
If I don't laugh, I'll cry.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
a most offensive typo
and also an unusual one, given the content
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
have you not seen the bellies on Ethiopian children?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:33, Reply)
She won't be wanting for male company.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:14, Reply)
She is a beautiful little girl, probably a bit early for dating though

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:15, Reply)
Whoah! Who said anything about dating?
I'm only in it for the sex.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:19, Reply)
Your wife's a slapper or something blah blah blah

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:16, Reply)
+forest moon of endor

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:17, Reply)
Dont talk about his 3rd born child like that

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:58, Reply)
Have intercourse with a lady

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)
/natch

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)
As a matter of fact
a hot lunch is laying a piece of clingfilm over somebody's mouth and then shitting on it. I don't believe you actually eat the lunch.

Though I could be getting confused with a Cleveland Steamer, here.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:12, Reply)
thanks for clarifying mate
boy could my face have been "red" tonight at the scat orgy
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:13, Reply)
Listen, don't worry, mate.
You'll own it.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:16, Reply)
I've been eating curries all week, to give my guests a spicy "surprise"

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:17, Reply)
A Cleveland Steamer is when you drop one on someone's chest
....I imagine.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
where's swipe when we need her?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:23, Reply)

fire roast
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:13, Reply)
YM

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:13, Reply)
There are lots of ancient sites I want to visit.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:16, Reply)
something something your mum something

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:16, Reply)
yeah til the muzzas blow them all up

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:18, Reply)
How you feeling, love?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:20, Reply)
I'll pull through

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:23, Reply)
You need a cloth through you from one end to the other?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:25, Reply)
Follow through more like

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:26, Reply)
Yes. I'd love to see Macchu Picchu (spelling)

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
Not really a big Pokemon fan tbh

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
unlikely monty reference for the day

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:32, Reply)
What's a machu picchu?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:35, Reply)
About ten pounds an hour?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:41, Reply)
*applause*

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:44, Reply)
lol

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:46, Reply)
Sarah Jane Honeywell

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:20, Reply)
Hells bells

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
Warning: Everyone in the first 3 rows WILL get wet

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:23, Reply)
Got a thing for pigtails, have we?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:29, Reply)
There are other hairstyles available
but sure, why not?
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
blah blah hurty animals blah.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
Look, as long as she doesn't talk, we'll be fine
She's also a vegan, which would NOT work with me.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:23, Reply)
well you want her to ingest some meat dontcha

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:25, Reply)
If by 'ingest' you mean 'put into her vagina' and by 'meat' you mean 'my penis'
Then yes
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
Although I would also do her mouth and bum

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
She's not all that.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:26, Reply)
I'm sure she'll be devastated to hear this, Stunned

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
floods of tears

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:29, Reply)
now, see, i don't get this
surely that just means MOAR bacon for you?
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
While that is technically true
I'm sure she'd object to me eating meat in front of her. I don't need to be lectured about my eating habits.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:32, Reply)
You do eat like a pig though

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:33, Reply)
BE THAT AS IT MAY
I wish to engage in the physical act of love with Ms Honeywell, and nothing more.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:35, Reply)
Well look, I'll put a call in to her agent.
But I'm not making any promises and it's up to you to clear it with Mrs Hats.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:37, Reply)
We have already discussed this at length
And in the unlikely event that I'm presented with this opportunity, I have been green-lit to do so.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:38, Reply)
she loves the pork sword.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:32, Reply)
TH's Sweetbreads™
You'll wish you'd tried 'em years ago!
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:34, Reply)
Go to Australia and New York (not unachievable)
Go deep sea diving.

Sleep with Tom Hardy

Alt. Im here til 5. I have however bought myself a new wok so will be doing some friend noodles with chicken and prawn for tea. Nice.

Wok n woll
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:20, Reply)
you like em buff eh?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:21, Reply)
Not really one for celebs and that but he is a treat to the eyes.
I like em with personality but obvs not a minger.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
you should watch Bronson, he gets his willy out a lot

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:25, Reply)
Seen it :) haha!

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
great film that

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:29, Reply)
^ ghey ^

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:35, Reply)
Tea?
Pleb.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
Northern at that

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:25, Reply)
Northern

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
'friend noodles?'
Chandler Mein? Hot & Joey? Chicken & Monica?
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:25, Reply)
Noodly appendage, I suspect

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
Sicko!
9 1/2 reeks
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:36, Reply)
Way to many to mention...........
alt: I've got just over three and a half hours to get through.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:22, Reply)
I've always wanted to peer into a active volcano and throw stuff in.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:24, Reply)
I'd throw you in

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:24, Reply)
i'm sure i remember seeing a video when i did geography at school about some idiots trying to ride a boat down lava
not surprisingly... they died.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:26, Reply)
That's a fucking manly way to go.
Well done, them.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
This is nuts, but apparently faked.
www.boredpanda.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2013/07/photographer-kawika-singson-caught-on-fire-while-shooting-lava.jpg
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:40, Reply)
Rihanna and Katy Perry.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:26, Reply)
cunts to a man

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
Rihanna's chin looks like quit a few balls have already smashed hell out of it

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
That's so hot

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
By balls I mean Chris Browns fist

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:29, Reply)
Well she could suck my Chris Brown's fist any day

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
She's no Noémie Lenoir

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:33, Reply)
didn't she slit her wrists
apparently some internet prick was stalking her
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:35, Reply)
it was HH.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:36, Reply)
TTJ

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:37, Reply)
Oh my
Yes, she is beautiful
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:36, Reply)
he's a fucking prick

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:31, Reply)
Yes

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:31, Reply)
Two Hats, not Chris Brown.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:34, Reply)
I won't deny this

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:35, Reply)
i really want to go white water rafting
and i'd love to sail a really fast boat, but the maths totally defeats me.

and i want to go on one of those mad mabel things, i've only ever done a banana boat.

basically, a lot of water sports.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
hur hur

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
^ I get this

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
maths? Do you mean you're too heavy for the boat to go fast/float?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:31, Reply)
If you add her to the boat, it sinks.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:35, Reply)
That's not a maths problem, that's a lard problem.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:41, Reply)
whatever happened to fat bobby?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:27, Reply)
Flounced

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:28, Reply)
bobby was on here the other night
so hh is lying to you. i don't know why he would do that, al. i really don't.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:29, Reply)
Shut it, Iron Bru undercarriage

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:30, Reply)
"Made in Scatland, from girders"

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:33, Reply)
I've always wanted to write a bucket list, but have never got round to it, so I'd like a go at that please

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:36, Reply)
why not do it right here in this thread, I'll start you off:
Row a coracle to Ireland
Learn to realign chakras
See the sun rise at stone hence at midsummer
Bum a lama
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:38, Reply)
I thought the idea was to plan things you'd never tried?

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:39, Reply)
well clearly I was guessing

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:40, Reply)

a The Dalai
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:41, Reply)
This fucking curry seems to be about 50% cardamom pods.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:38, Reply)
they are right cunts those pods

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:39, Reply)
50% catfood.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:39, Reply)
Take them out, then go back to where you bought it
and spit them, one by one, at the cunt that sold it to you
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:39, Reply)
this is the kind of consumer advice I can get behind, Twosie for Watchdog presenter

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:40, Reply)
Anne Robinson can kiss my bellend

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:41, Reply)
mmmm leathery

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:42, Reply)
and so is Anne

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:43, Reply)
I fuckin will as well

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:42, Reply)
Don't take any guff from these savages
They want to cook in our country, they play by our fucking rules
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:43, Reply)
BITE THE CURB BITE THE CURB !!! TEE HEE !!!! MAKE HIM BITE THE CURB !!!

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)
Write the great American novel

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:40, Reply)
I'd like to fuck 'shitpants' Nugent, in 2013

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:42, Reply)
Who wouldn't

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:43, Reply)
Shave my pubes

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:48, Reply)
thanks for that chompy

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:48, Reply)
haha!
Like Cthulu and Medusa had a baby, aborted it, then stapled it to the shapeless lardy body of an autist from the Home Counties.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)
Not unless you say please

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)
Please
Balls in your court now
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)
ok

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)
I'd like a perm please
No Arthur Rimbaud though pet.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:55, Reply)
To meet someone who's genuinely had their arm broken by a swan

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:50, Reply)
Also: To meet someone whos put a duck in a cave and not heard an echo

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:51, Reply)
To try a really good seafood curry

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:52, Reply)
I had a great thai green currey with fish once

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)
I've had OK seafood curries
but I'd love to have a brilliant one
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)
I've had a nice Thai seafood curry, and nice Tikka fish, but never a nice fish curry.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)
My "local to work" Indian does an amazing king prawn/spinach curry

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:02, Reply)
prawns aren't fish though are they you IDIOT

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)
I had a cracking Monkfish Masala at Purnell's in Birmingham
And a disappointing one at a non-Michelin-starred place.

Think you're going to have to shell out for it, TH.


EDIT: www.catererandhotelkeeper.co.uk/articles/27/5/2009/327915/glynn-purnell-masterclass-monkfish.htm
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:31, Reply)
To be a film noir private detective

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:53, Reply)
*blacks up*

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)
Alright, Sam Spade

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)
Not a black dick, you numpty

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)
to have sex with the Wee Papa Girl Rappers

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:54, Reply)
We ruuuuule, Wee Papa rule the dance
and so on
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:55, Reply)
They ruled at being fucking munters

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:57, Reply)
Haha
A dubious honour
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:59, Reply)
To find a wristwatch that I enjoy wearing

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:55, Reply)
You might find mine up YM. I lost it up there last night.
God I loved that watch.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)
But if you were up my Mum, that means.....
UH-OH!
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:06, Reply)
Two Hats, I am your father.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:48, Reply)
To see all seven members of S Club reunited

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)

reunited stitched together a la "the human centipede"
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:57, Reply)
Dafney and Celest must be legal by now.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)
to have sex with Monty Boyce.
Top or bottom, I don't mind, I'd go switch for MB.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:56, Reply)
I'm a Power Top
Born and bred
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:57, Reply)
Gladiators' final series tried to expand it's appeal to the LGBT community

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:58, Reply)

Can you feel the power, of THE GLADIATORS
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:59, Reply)
In Pakistans first ever homegrown animated show Burkha Avenger,
a villain tries to blow up London and Paris but is foiled by not being about to get a European Visa.
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:57, Reply)

to get a European Visa my bins
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 13:59, Reply)
MARRvellous

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:00, Reply)

being staying
to get a European Visa. from their bins
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:00, Reply)
To dance in stilletos in the snow

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:01, Reply)
Si, Barone.

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:11, Reply)
To see a new thread started that will keep me entertained through the final hour of the working week

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:02, Reply)
Never happy, you

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:02, Reply)
But my neighbour's grass IS greener than mine

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)
I'm really rather fond of his oxen as well

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:04, Reply)
Woah
easy
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)
They certainly were, the fucking slags

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)
To learn a dead language

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)
I'd like to fuck YM up the nose
I've been to the pub. I had Tiger beer

It was good
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)
To kill a language

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:03, Reply)
I'd like to burn a gypsy
rn not m
(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:04, Reply)
Take a couple of bottles of blue WKD to the next fair that comes to town

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)
lollers

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:04, Reply)
To meet a nice south african

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:05, Reply)
^ not surprising mon ^

(, Fri 26 Jul 2013, 14:06, Reply)

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