I am on the verge of having to empty my colostomy bag.
And seeing as my hands are shaking this is going to end badly.

When was the last time you woke up on the sofa after two hours sleep and made it to work on time?

Alt: should I have the stewed cheese as a starter at lunch today?

Alt alt: Pork or Lamb chop?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:37, 204 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

alt:alt: Footchop?
Hey look at this you couldn't make it up
metro.co.uk/2013/09/06/model-helicopter-slices-teenagers-throat-in-freak-accident-3952349/
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:39, Reply)

What a prick.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:41, Reply)

Yeah but what about the helicopter guy?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)

What helicopter guy?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:43, Reply)

:(

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:43, Reply)

teenager my arse
he looked about 29 in that picture
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:48, Reply)

That is the best thing that can happen to an Eastern European teenager.
Did his Mum take a day off from being on the game in England to go to his funeral?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:41, Reply)

SO STEWED CHEESE OR NOT?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)

I've never even heard of Stewed cheese before
It really doesn't sound nice
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:43, Reply)

recipe for ye
Put 3 spoonfulls of water, & ye yolk of an egg, & a lump of butter, beat up, at ye bottom of a pewter plate. Slice yr cheese in thin small bits upon it, yn stew it on a chafing dish of coals wth an other plate over it.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:45, Reply)

I’d rather have an omelette

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:46, Reply)

ghey

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:46, Reply)

Ha ha this-a-way, ha ha that-a-way, ha ha this-a-way, my oh my
Ha ha this-a-way, ha ha that-a-way, ha ha this-a-way, my oh my
Ostagazuzulum, that was the magic word
Ostagazuzulum, my oh my
He can do magic, magic, magic!
Magic a rabbit, eight feet high
Ha ha this-a-way, ha ha that-a-way, ha ha this-a-way, my oh my
Ha ha this-a-way, ha ha that-a-way, ha ha this-a-way, my oh my
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:40, Reply)

Color u peach and black
Color me takin aback
Crucial, I think I wantcha
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:41, Reply)

Really? That was the magic word?
Blimey.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Now that's magic!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Alright Gonz?
After the christmas party 2 years ago, all day drinking 5am bedtime, 7am wake up.

alt: why would you stew cheese?

altalt: Different meats for different needs
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)

I often used to do this
Was out almost every Thursday until 4am for many years, scraping through Friday (though I originally typed scarping, which seems more appropriate)

Alt:
Yes - that can only end well

AltAlt:
Lamb - tastes nicer than pork
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:42, Reply)

Thank you, Sporters.
A nice big Barnsley chop may just be what the butcher ordered.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:44, Reply)

I'd struggle through until lunch then fuck off out for a dirty chicken kebab or something

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

Chop house lunch.
The best of all the Friday lunches.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

I have a few idea of what you might have been up to last night.
alt alt: chops, needoo style innit.
( wanderlust, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:43, Reply)

GET OUT OF MY HEAD!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:45, Reply)

Kylielolz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:46, Reply)

OK "Billy Ocean"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:47, Reply)

HROA

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:47, Reply)

And a bit more this morning to get you to work on time?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Hans, booby!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:48, Reply)

knees and toes
knees and toes
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:56, Reply)

HRAIN

( wanderlust, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:49, Reply)

x

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:51, Reply)

www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xVp1mauGnU&feature=share
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Bit early for me love,
thanks though x
( wanderlust, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

Used to do the old 'sofa wake up' at my old job years ago. Me and co-workers used to go out midweek, and turn up half cut/half dead...
and were of no use for the day. But seeing as there were about 20 of us all doing the same thing, there wasn't much the management could do about it.
Alt: No
Alt:alt: If there's a choice, lamb every time brother.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:44, Reply)

I love this kind of thing.
"We were all fucking useless at work, and there was nothing the management could do".
Of course they could do something, you were just lucky you had shit management.
(Bazongaloid, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Alt alt: What's the vegetarian option?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:45, Reply)

Stay in the office.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:46, Reply)

kill yourself

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:46, Reply)

i suspect the stewed cheese may be it
in other vegetarian news, my order of 30 tasty tasty packets of tasty chickpeas arrived today. i have bombay fire, thai sweet chilli, or tomato, garlic and herb, all for just 88 calories and 1.2grams a massive packet, and tonnes of protein and fibre. in your face, pork chops.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Try not to eat them all at once eh

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:56, Reply)

you couldn't
they are really really filling
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

No *I* couldn't
But we're not talking about me.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

oh right, it's a rachelswipe is fat jibe is it?
you are indeed the king of coventry comedy
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:56, Reply)

not surprising after 2 hours' sleep at your age

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

1.8 grams a packet?
they can't be that massive. Unless they are made of air.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:30, Reply)

Today.
Alt: yes
Altalt: karate
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Hai Karate.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:49, Reply)

The scent of men

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

I'm talking to someone on IM at work, but I need to go and poo
what's the correct etiquette?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:47, Reply)

Is there a poo emoticon?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:48, Reply)

sadly not

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:51, Reply)

Poo on the keyboard and send a photo.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:51, Reply)

brb, poo

(Reverend Fister "a disciplined fuckwit", Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:21, Reply)

more regularly than i should, but a lot less than i used to. luckily i only need a few hours' sleep to function
there were times when i went to my previous job on zero sleep. turns out toilet roll makes quite an effective pillow on the disabled toilet floor.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:47, Reply)

mops up spunk efficiently too

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:50, Reply)

so does your hair

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:51, Reply)

tell me about it, stud.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:52, Reply)

there was a pic on reddit last night (just his face with a caption, nothing gross) called "hairy people's woes"
and it said, "like trying to scrub peanut butter out of a shagpile carpet".

this simile will haunt me forever.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

Whose face?

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:02, Reply)

god knows
some hairyass mo'fo'
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Altalt: ym

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:50, Reply)

Pork or Lamb chop, my mum?
You haven't even done the most basic of research.

SHE FUCKING LOVES SAUSAGE!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:53, Reply)

So does your daddy.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:55, Reply)

saucy

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:02, Reply)

Now, the world don't move to the beat of just one drum,
What might be right for you, may not be right for some.
A man is born, he's a man of means.
Then along come two, they got nothing but their jeans.
But they got, Diff'rent Strokes.
It takes, Diff'rent Strokes.
It takes, Diff'rent Strokes to move the world.

Just sayin
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Wotchu talkin about, Monty?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:53, Reply)

fuck
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:54, Reply)

pfft

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

What you talking about?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:54, Reply)

Fucking black kids wasting all his money on drugs and hip hop and trainers.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

YEAH WHAT CUNTS

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:58, Reply)

HAT OG
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

POTD.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

POTW and quite possibly Y

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

I'm pooping as I write this.

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:53, Reply)

Alright, "Curly"?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

You know we belong together
You and I forever and ever
No matter where you are
Your my guiding star
And from the very first moment I saw you
I never felt such emotion
I'm walking on air
Just to know... (just to know)
You are there... (you are there)
Hold me in your arms
Don't let me go
I want to stay forever
Closer each day...
Home and away

Just sayin
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:57, Reply)

That's beautiful.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Thanks, I just made it up, just then.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

I've recently decided that kings of Leon are my favourite band. Just sayin

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

You have chosen.......poorly.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Shut it Templar shite, they speak to me!

( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

bullshit mr han man

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Do you want to buy a load of their early singles at a vastly inflated price?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

He used to give me roses
I wish he could again;
But that was on the outside,
And things were different then.

We'd built our world together,
With a love so clear and strong;
But that was on the outside.
Where did i go wrong?

On the inside the sun still shines,
And the rain falls down;
But the sun and rain are prisoners too,
When morning comes around.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

There's a voice that keeps on calling me
Down the road, that's where I'll always be.
Every stop I make, I make a new friend,
Can't stay for long, just turn around and I'm gone again

Maybe tomorrow, I'll want to settle down,
Until tomorrow, I'll just keep moving on.

So if you want to join me for a while,
Just grab your hat, come travel light, that's hobo style
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

I had this as an earworm a few weeks ago

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

It's a great song.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

A *true* classic

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

Jamie! Jamie!
Jamie and the Magic Torch.
Down the helter skelter, faster and faster,
Towards Cuckoo Land.

Wordsworth! Wordsworth!
Following hard behind.
Ready for adventure, always there to lend a paw
...or hand!

Mr Boo and all the others too,
The strangest people you've ever seen.
And the torch with its magical beam -
If I hadn't really been there,
I'd think that I was dreaming!

Jamie! Jamie!
No two nights are the same.
Life is one long glorious game,
with Jamie.
Jamie and the Magic Torch!
[Yeah! Switch On!]
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:58, Reply)

T.U.N.E.
The powerchords when it kicks off are fuckin MENTAL MATE
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

It's good, but it's no Chorlton and the Wheelies.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

What is?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Your mum

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

textbook

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)

Alright, Vinegar Tits?

i used to give her roses,
I wish i could again;
But that was on the outside,
And things were different then.

We'd built our world together,
With a love so clear and strong;
But that was on the outside.
Where did i go wrong?

*******************
CHORUS
On the inside the sun still shines,
And the rain falls down;
But the sun and rain are prisoners too,
When morning comes around.

*******************
VERSE 2
Last night i dreamed we were together,
Sharing all the love we've known;
Til i had to face the nightmare,
Of waking up alone.

*******************
CHORUS
On the inside the sun still shines,
And the rain falls down;
But the sun and rain are prisoners too,
When morning comes around.

On the inside the roses grow;
They don't mind the stoney ground;
But the roses here are prisoners too,
When morning comes around.

*******************
He used to give me roses,
I wish he could again;
But that was on the outside,
An things were different then.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Haha
MARRS MUTHAFUCKA
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

In your own time, gammytoes.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Mine was on before his although they are timed the same.
Copycat cunt.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

history will tell a different story

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:05, Reply)

And there was no reference in the title.
Coz he isn't into "Prisoner" the same as me.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

What's on TV Bea?

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Better.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)

I still remember coming in from the nights clubs wrecked out of your head
and then watching "cell block H"
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Wrecked out of MY head.
No wonder I look so old. You were taking my head out on the lash!!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

This is the main reason I still have my boyish good looks

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)

New series on Channel 5 called 'Wentworth'
I haven't tuned in yet, it won't be as good as the original.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:00, Reply)

It's brilliant and I love it.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:03, Reply)

www.yorkshireeveningpost.co.uk/what-s-on/arts-entertainment/tv-previews/tv-interview-danielle-is-bringing-favourite-prison-drama-back-to-life-1-5981671
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:01, Reply)

Look down there's Tickle town, and there's the River Tum
Tickle on the what?

Just sayin
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:04, Reply)

Christopher Lillicrap.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:06, Reply)

Do you like to sing songs?
Do you like to hear rhymes?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Do you like to take small children to see the puppies in the woods?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Just the good ol' boys
Never meaning no harm
Beats all you ever saw
Been in trouble with the law
Since the day they was born

Straightening the curves
Flattening the hills
Someday the mountain might get 'em
But the law never will

Making their way
Any way they know how
That's just a little bit more
Than the law will allow

I'm a good ol' boy
You know my mama loved me
But she don't understand
They keep a showin' my hands
And not my face on TV, verse from the movie
Just the good ol' boys
Wouldn't change if they could
Fightin' the system like a true
Modern day Robin Hood

Just sayin'
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:07, Reply)

And with Waylon Jennings, I think we have our winner.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

^

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Any friend of Johnny Cash is a friend of mine.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

NOW YOU OWN IT, SHITFOOT

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:08, Reply)

*grabs mop and sprays Febreeze*
When I worked in the bar trade there were several times I'd wake up on a sofa somewhere after a night of partying, despite having a day shift. hair of the dog sorted that out.

Alt. Wouldn't this just be cheesy water?

AltAlt. STEAK

Anyone seen the Robocop reboot trailer? Looks fackin awesome!
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:09, Reply)

Robocop does indeed look good

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

Working on the site,
From Morning 'till night,
That's livin' alright,
That's livin' alright,

Then a pint with the boys,
In a bar full of noise,
That's livin' alright,
That's livin' alright,

Working all day,
For a pittance of pay,
Then blow it all on Saturday night,

And you kiss the dames,
But you don't ask their names,
That's livin' alright.

Working in the sun,
Drinking Schnapps having fun,
That's livin' alright,
That's livin' alright,

Then a night in the town,
Spreadin' it around,
That's livin' alright,
That's livin' alright,

Working all day,
For a packet of pay,
And send a little back to the wife,

Still you keep a little here,
Just to keep you in beer,
That's livin alright.

Yeah you play the game,
Then it's Auf Wiedersehen,
That's livin alright.

Telling the lie,
With a glint in your eye,
'Cause tommorrow you'll be back on the site,

And you kiss the dames,
But you don't ask their names,
That' livin alright.

Yeah you play the game,
Then it's Auf Wiedersehen,

That's livin' alright,
That's livin' alright,
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)

Joe Fagan penned and sung ^

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)

Looks a bit like Bear Pookie
www.youtube.com/watch?v=gJsz07A3wpw
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

Huh, now lookie here, people
Listen to my story
A little story 'bout a man named Jed
You know something, that poor mountaineer
They say he barely kept his family fed

Now, let me tell you, one day he was shootin'
Old Jed was shootin' at some food
When all of a sudden right up from the ground, there
Well, there came a bubblin' crude
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:10, Reply)

how has nobody mentioned how their life got turned upside down yet
because of trouble in their neighbourhood
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:11, Reply)

I have no idea what that one is

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:12, Reply)

I think she is making it all up double H

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

Fresh Prince of Bel Air you oaf.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

Sorry never heard of her

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)

She's the fat feminist AA rolled home

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)

and click

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)

I *think* he's joking you massive bellend

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)

unlikely

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)

if you think he is capable of cracking a joke
then you obviously haven't read many of his posts
( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:26, Reply)

what???

( rachelswipe with a fork, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

OIL THAT IS.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

BLACK GOLD

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

TEXAS TEA

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)

That'll teach me for reading the thread and then deciding to reply without refreshing.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)

Black gold

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:17, Reply)

MASSIVE CLANGER!

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)

This is the planet earth...

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:22, Reply)

I've got that and all
www.trunkrecords.com/turntable/clangers.shtml
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:26, Reply)

Yoffy lifts a finger, and a mouse is there
Puts his hands together,
and a seagull takes the air
Yoffy lifts a finger,
and a scampi darts about
Yoffy bends another,
and a tortoise head peeps out
These hands were made for making,
and making they must do."
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

Trunk Records released an album of the music from this last year:
www.trunkrecords.com/turntable/fingerbobs.shtml
It's well good.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)

I have an LP called Playschool Breaks which has some great stuff on it inc
www.youtube.com/watch?v=nklV0vFAddE
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)

I'd rather listen to USA for Africa.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)

Is that Toto's latest offering?

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:23, Reply)

Yeah thanks for that, I'm now browsing ebay for children's records :(

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:25, Reply)

lols for "and a tortoise head peeps out"

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:15, Reply)

I may have rolled in about 9:25 this morning
and then immediately gone to the canteen and had an emergency Full English. And a cup of tea. And a pint of water. Now I'm wondering if it would be taking the piss to book the afternoon off.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:13, Reply)

^ beer mouse ^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

Not at all.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:14, Reply)

I was expecting Sporty to post this one
Come here me little Jackie
Now ’av smoked me baccy
Let wer hev a cracky
Till the boat comes in.

Dance ti’ thy daddy, sing ti’ thy mammy,
Dance ti’ thy daddy, ti’ thy mammy sing;
Thou shall hev a fishy on a little dishy,
Thou shall hev a fishy when the boat comes in.
( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:16, Reply)

You forget
That due to sporters being a northerner he wouldn't have had access to a TV during his youth. If documentaries are to be believed he would have spent all his time with other children in some sort of grove
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)

Having worked near Byker for 17 years I fear for any child who had the misfortune to grow up there
Grim
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:22, Reply)

It was a fairytale?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:25, Reply)

More like a teary fail

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:26, Reply)

I fucking hate that song

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:21, Reply)

haha *Sets to ringtone*

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:23, Reply)

You can run with us,
We've got everything you need, Run with us,
We are free.
Come with us,
I see passion in your eyes,
Run with us.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:16, Reply)

God that show was shit

( Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)

Chocky's Children
amirite?
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:18, Reply)

Racoons man!!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:21, Reply)

If you want to I'll change the situation.
Right people, right time; just the wrong location.
I've got a good idea: Just you keep me near. I'll be so good for you.

I could be so good for you. I'm gonna help ya!
Love you like you want me to. I'll do anything for you . . . I'll be so good for you.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:20, Reply)

Battered = Halfa Daily

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:22, Reply)

I said it's got twin cam
And turbo charge
And it reaches some hairy speeds
He said I tell you what I'll give you 1200 sovs
I was laughing all the way to The Leeds.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:24, Reply)

I don't understand this thread

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:24, Reply)

And the one last night made any sense?

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:25, Reply)

YES!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:27, Reply)

Dashing and daring
courageous and caring
faithful and friendly with stories to share
all through the forest
they sing out in chorus
marching along as their song fills the air.
( Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:24, Reply)

'Theme from Jethro', right?

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:25, Reply)

Yaaaarrrrp

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:27, Reply)

That was Gloucestershire
He plays Clegane in Game of Thrones don't you know
( Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:29, Reply)

( Peej, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)

One for all and all for one.....

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:26, Reply)

YM and her sisters.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)

Or 'The musky hounds' as they are known locally.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:30, Reply)

this is really very good.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:32, Reply)

Oh come with me,
To the rolling sea,
While the weather's calm and still.
And we'll have some fun and laughter with
The Adventures of Portland Bill.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:28, Reply)

seaman stains

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:29, Reply)

Roger the CabZZZZzzzzzzzzzz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:29, Reply)

The heat is on, the time is right,
It's time for you, for you to play your game.
'Cause people are coming, everyone's trying,
Trying to be the best that they can,
When they're going for... going for... Gold.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:29, Reply)

YOU'RE BACK IN PLAAAY!!!

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:33, Reply)

" I' m a story teller , and my stories must be told . ..
I have many stories , tales for both the young an
old.. .
I have many voices to describe many places,
many names have I, and many faces . ..
In Russia I am Ivan, in Sweden I am Jon. ..
In Germany I' m Johan , in America I' m John. ..
From my many travels I have gathered these
tales.. .
To teach good sense, where all else fails . ..
Sometimes there are tears , sometimes there is
laughter. ..
But always , a happily ever after. .. "
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:32, Reply)

Am I too late?
From Gangreen's lab come forth each week.
The ripe red monsters of which we speak.
Except when he has a security leak!

Tomatoes! Tomatoes!

Oh, isn't it..... (??)
Tomatoes eating the city
Can no-one stop these mutant fruits
Where will we find our brave recruits?
Can Wilbur get rid of that dumb parachute?

Tomatoes! Tomatoes! Tomatoes!!
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:32, Reply)

ripe red monsterlolz

( hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Fri 6 Sep 2013, 10:55, Reply)