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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Injury time
Give Swipey some love after her fall xoxo Then do a Rory and steal her thunder by telling the group of your worst injury woes.

I'm thankful that I haven;t had any serious injurys. I did get knocked out by a bouncy castle when I was about 8 though (gay).
It was on a beach with a playgroup. The wind actually blew it in the air and I fell off onto the sand and it landed on top of me.

Alt. Lunch.

AltAlt. Good times ahead?
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:03, 162 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
I once got hit by a falling burger from a tower, I think it knocked me out, all I know is that I slept
for at least 14 hours, it was shocking
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:07, Reply)
I'm not getting the reference here...

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:08, Reply)
Shitting hell

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:15, Reply)
NUUURRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH NNNJJUUUUUUYRGGGHHHHH

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:11, Reply)
is this your answer to all 3?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:11, Reply)
NUUURRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH NNNJJUUUUUUYRGGGHHHHHH

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:17, Reply)
NURSE! Up the meds!

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:18, Reply)

meds! Khyber
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:23, Reply)

Khyber BUM!
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:26, Reply)
What a carry on

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:30, Reply)
Shitting hell, that's shocking.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:11, Reply)
I broke my thumb a few times playing rugby
and punctured my foot with a blunt bit of metal. I think I may have even posted the photos on here before.

That's as serious as I've got thankfully. *touches wood, winks*
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:12, Reply)
I thought this was an ok question.
So fuck y'all.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:13, Reply)
What was the question again?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:15, Reply)
Injury woes

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:17, Reply)
A/S/L?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:24, Reply)
I cut the end of my finger off in a bench saw.
And badly cut my wrist putting my hand through a window.

Got a nice scar on my leg from a barbed wire fence and on my shin from a brick wall.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:15, Reply)
what happened to your face?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:18, Reply)
I smashed out my front teeth while pissed, after getting out a taxi to be sick.
After lying unconscious in the road for a while, once said taxi driver had stolen all my money and left me to die, I was found by some do-gooders who stopped to help this poor man (me). In a bizarre twist of fate these do-gooders happened to be two sets of my friends parents, so that wasn't embarrassing.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:19, Reply)
ooof
did they put them back, or do you have a blowjob gap?
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:29, Reply)
New ones put in.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:32, Reply)
*cancels visit to Folkestone*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:33, Reply)
*Appreciates correct spelling*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:35, Reply)
All I want for Christmas is my two front teeth

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:31, Reply)
And I got them! Thanks Santa!

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:32, Reply)

from a barbed wire fence and on my shin from a brick wall. where my foot used to be
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:19, Reply)
I'm having two Zinger Tower burgers for lunch.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:15, Reply)
I ET my lunch 14 hours ago

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:15, Reply)
I GET THIS REFERENCE!!!
Bit plane though aren't they?
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:17, Reply)
HA! Dunno never had one.
I stole this from Twohats and passed it off as my own.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:21, Reply)
Classic B3ta!

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:24, Reply)
The ideal senario would be to have one zinger burger only with two towers and a side of hotwings.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:24, Reply)
last night was about as dramatic as it's ever gotten for me too
i had lasik when i was 21. that was some scaryass surgery.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:18, Reply)
Oh yeah
I had mine done in 2002
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:18, Reply)
Ha Ha
Pair of Bonk Eyed Flids

Points and laughs
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:20, Reply)
Not any more
*glares with 20/20 x-ray vision*
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:21, Reply)
"Bonk-eyed flids" is excellent.
I shall be stealing it and using it and claiming it as my own.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:27, Reply)
i think it's a monty expression

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:28, Reply)
I have used it for many years
But it is not beyond the realms of reason that 2 people could have been influenced by the same thing many years ago
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:31, Reply)
Bit like those children eh

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:29, Reply)
IT'S BEEN PROVED IN A COURT OF LAW THAT I DIDN'T TOUCH THEM!
What?

Oh.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:33, Reply)
Classic B3ta!

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:29, Reply)
*bows*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:34, Reply)
2 kids were killed by an inflatable thing at Chester-le-St a few years ago
I broke my scaphoid bone in my wrist, falling over a dog when drunk

Alt:
Extra spicy tuna sandwich

AltAlt:
Maybe
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:18, Reply)

an inflatable thing at Chester-le-St a few years ago by me in a bath
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:20, Reply)
That's Soham last year

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:20, Reply)
Oof.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:25, Reply)
I used to have a relative in Chester-Le-Street
Even as a child visiting him felt like visiting the 1930s
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:20, Reply)
Nothing has changed
The castle and cricket ground are nice though
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:21, Reply)
Never had a serious injury, never had a broken bone, never had surgery
Just a few cuts and bruises, I'm like Bruce Willis in that film
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:20, Reply)
Yippi-ki-yay

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:20, Reply)
You're really dead?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:21, Reply)
Whoa what's with all the threats?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:21, Reply)
Hudson Hawk?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:21, Reply)
*would you rather be a fish*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:22, Reply)
*shudders*
Sandra Bernhard was in that
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:23, Reply)
It truly was an awful film

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:24, Reply)
Shhhh
I quite like it,
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:30, Reply)
but dont tell ANYONE ok?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:30, Reply)
haha
*starts Chinese whispers*
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:31, Reply)
^ racist

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:34, Reply)
Checks laces

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:35, Reply)
Death Becomes Her?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:34, Reply)
I broke my wrist skateboarding.
I was a relatively good skateboarder - got up to catching a couple of feet of air off halfpipes, and nearly successful at handplants.

The thing with breaking my wrist was that it was after a session, and I was just trundling along at 0.5mph, and hit a tiny little stone, which was enough to stop the board dead and make me stack it forwards, breaking my wrist.

Which was crap.

Alt: homemade chicken wrap by Mrs Vagabond because she loves me - NOM.

Alt: drinks on Friday with mates, but the post-holiday blues are proving hard to shift.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:22, Reply)
That was my wrist woe
11am-3am drinking session. Wandering home with mate, not watching where I was going and tripped over his dog
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:27, Reply)
^ Lightweight Limpwrist ^

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:28, Reply)
trufax

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:35, Reply)
Best of all the stagenames.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:37, Reply)
I stabbed a garden fork through my foot once, right through, shoe, foot, bottom of shoe. Yes I was that hungry.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:24, Reply)
Are you my Mum? She did this.
Or are you just both morons?
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:27, Reply)
Tidy your room

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:39, Reply)
When ever I see people doing gardening type of thing in flip flops or sandles I shudder

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:27, Reply)
What is a sandle?
Is it like a sandal?
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:28, Reply)
yes only made from wood

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:29, Reply)
Like a clog?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:30, Reply)
No like a sandal DO KEEP UP

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:30, Reply)
What's a sandal?
It it like a sandle?
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:31, Reply)
Vandles wear them

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:32, Reply)
Do Vandle's sandles have handles?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:37, Reply)
For candles?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:37, Reply)
*shakes fist*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:38, Reply)
*Boom Boom, shakes the room*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:47, Reply)
There are a version of sandals for night-time vandals that have candles on them.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:38, Reply)
No
But vandals sandals have handals
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:38, Reply)
>:(

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:33, Reply)
OW!
There used to be this little Scottish lass living next to me (NO SCOTCH CHAT). When she was 9 or so, she stood on a plank of wood with a rusty nail that went right through the middle of her foot.
She didn't cry once.

Nails.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:33, Reply)
Irn bru for blood

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:45, Reply)
accident prone?
knocked myself out when the lid of the slow cooker bounced off my head. stapled my finger. trod on an upturned plug. slashed leg on barbed wire.nutted a lampost when tiddly when trying to get up off the floor..got my toe stuck in a rainwater gully after doing a dog avoidance dance and sprained my ankle. the list is endless....

Alt: I made Imam biyaldi last night and have some leftover...
Alt alt: might have a job soon
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:33, Reply)
Upturned plug fuckin kills!!

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:33, Reply)
this^
Also Lego
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:36, Reply)
Also see Stubbed toe

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:37, Reply)
See also; Cutting own head off

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:40, Reply)
Nothing Compared to Man-flu

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:45, Reply)
Sinéad O'Connor's ZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:46, Reply)
it's been seven hours and fifteen days
Since you commenced your torrid affair with your ex.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:47, Reply)
Can't be me I've slept fot the last 14 days

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:51, Reply)
OK "Billy Joe Armstrong"

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:18, Reply)
it left a nasty bruise
and made me swear a lot.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:51, Reply)
Alt: Did it make you swoon?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:34, Reply)
a couple of months back I walked into a lamppost while pissed
I've had the obligatory skateboarding injuries and I once managed to run over my own finger while skating. It hurt quite a bit.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:38, Reply)
Alright Brian Harvey

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:39, Reply)
I'm really alright

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:45, Reply)
Worra fucking idiot he is.
*No baked potatoes were harmed in the making of this reference*
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:45, Reply)
I win
b3ta.com/questions/matron/post660624
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:51, Reply)
NUUURRRRGGGGGGHHHHHHHH NNNJJUUUUUUYRGGGHHHHHHF

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:54, Reply)
You're on form today.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:55, Reply)

form gardening leave
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:56, Reply)
OHHH NO HE ISN'T

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:57, Reply)
\o/

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:01, Reply)

tee hee
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:02, Reply)
What if this is a cry for help?








*shrugs*
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 12:58, Reply)
I think he's constipated.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:19, Reply)
I was just doing some household electrics bodging (I know, get me)
when I started coming over a bit swipe. Then I realised that I hadn't eaten anything yet today, therefore:

Alt: a sandwich.

AltAlt: my life will begin in three months and three days. I'm quite looking forward to that.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:08, Reply)
oooooooo

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:10, Reply)
It's shitting shocking!

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:11, Reply)
39 in Cowville this year

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:16, Reply)
+M

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:11, Reply)
*gets horn*

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:16, Reply)
(sh)udders

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:25, Reply)
I'm debt free at the end of November...
Just in time for a mega expensive wedding next year :(
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:15, Reply)
The servers today are almost as slow as Dozer.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:17, Reply)
Slowzer

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:18, Reply)
What have I missed?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:19, Reply)
6', by a long way

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:21, Reply)
this one time one of my ribs was sticking out of my chest,
after i fell off my skateboard, down a flight of stairs on a railing thing.
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:37, Reply)
Well fuck me sideways with a bollard
Its only WP, showing us that the unemployed can get up before 2pm
(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:48, Reply)
I've been up since 7.

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:52, Reply)
You went to bed at 5?

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:52, Reply)
A boys gotta get his 14 hrs

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 14:00, Reply)
Probably shat the bed after a night spent drinking tennants super in front of the poker channel

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:59, Reply)
Darn tooting

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 14:00, Reply)
<-- NEW THREAD

(, Wed 11 Sep 2013, 13:53, Reply)

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