Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
« Go Back | Popular
Little things that annoy youalt: little things that make you smile
altalt: bit gay
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:26,
328 replies,
latest was 11 years ago)
Odd socks.Alt: The budgie
Altalt: Mens 'Small Item' Bags
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:31,
Reply)
Women bitching about leaving the seat upNot putting stuff in the dishwasher, but on the bench next to it
Kate Bush
Alt:
Gay dog
People showing off and hurting themselves
Jurassic Park Melodica
AltAlt:
Not at all, no
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:33,
Reply)
Check out the 20th Century Fox fails(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:42,
Reply)
EverythingAlt: ugly people's misfortune
Altalt: Dozer.
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:47,
Reply)
now the sun is out there is some rank flesh on dispely(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:48,
Reply)
Yer I know - and people go a bit bonkers, too.Last night, we saw some besuited prick PROPER screaming at a barrier guard at the train station, DEMANDING to be let through because his Oystercard was OBVIOUSLY FUCKED, ISN'T IT and he HAD TO GET THAT TRAIN!
Then on the way back to our flat, a bloke just openly leaning over and leering at a young woman who was forced to shove him away.
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:50,
Reply)
I blame ignore 2.0.(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:00,
Reply)
I hope the train guy crossed his arms and stared at the guy silently until he went away.(
Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:04,
Reply)
maybe he had tyo get home for an emergency insulin injection?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:05,
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Then he'd better put a tenner on his Oyster sharpish and stop wasting time, hadn't he.(
Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:07,
Reply)
i bet you'd prefer it if people had to buy loads of little single journey tickets(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:07,
Reply)
^And the union members made to wear silly suits and stand at the sides and wave and say Thank You to all the commuters as they went by.
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:09,
Reply)
Tories
Chuggers
Buskers
Vegetarians
Muslims
People wearing flip flops with jeans
Wearing sunglasses on the tube
Those cunts who hand out papers and magazines at tube stations
Women drivers
Pious non smokers
People who don't drink booze
Apple fans
People who ask a cashpoint for a receipt but then don't take it
Wine snobs
Romanians
UKIP members
People dress their kids in matching outfits
The cunt who runs my local dry cleaners
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:48,
Reply)
Walk to the other side?(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:52,
Reply)
Fucked up one of my cashmere jumpers. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:54,
Reply)
Did he think it had shrunk during washing and tried to pull it back to normal size?(, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:58, Reply)
cashmere?what about all the poor people? why don't you buy a cheap jumper and send the difference to them?
tory cashmere wearing prick.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:32,
Reply)
I have several. All of which were gifts from my former in-laws. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:36,
Reply)
Football fans who say 'we' when referring to 'their' team.
Bus drivers pulling out in front of me
Mick Hucknall
Kroney's cardigans
Cyclists
Reality TV watchers and participants
People who put lists on the Internet
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:54,
Reply)
I have to agree. Football fans who support a team from a town or city with which they have no fucking connection whatsoever.
Man Utd, Liverpool and Chelsea fans especially.
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:56,
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I hope it gets lost when you move. I bet your bird does too. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:24,
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Shut up, you love it.If it's not too hot I'll wear it next time I see you. You'll like that.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:26,
Reply)
If you do. I will set fire to it. Whilst you're wearing it. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:27,
Reply)
12 angry men is a great film, Why haven't I watched it before?
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:51,
Reply)
I bet grace doesn't come out with any contented little squeaks when that happens. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:58,
Reply)
I bet grace is the giver in their relationship. He's probably had a strap-on harness especially made for her.
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:00,
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I still reckon you make her wear a strap on. That's well gay.
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:06,
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Anal sex with a man is a bit gay?Surely fucking a soft, gentle, sweet smelling woman is more gay /nickedfromstevehughes
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 13:58,
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How difficult it is to find decent removal men.I want some nice, professional working class types. Preferably with those brown coats on. Instead it's all Essex wideboys calling me "mate" and the mrs "love". Ghastly, over-familiar guttersnipes.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:13,
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You don't have a man-servant to handle that sort of business and deal with the lower classes? How shit!
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:14,
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Unfortunately the family fortune went to Australia with some distant great-aunt.Dashed inconvenient, what?
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:15,
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In other news a massive Travis Perkins lorry has stopped at the lights by the pub. Window down. Music blaring. The song; 'You're beautiful' by James Blunt.
WTF?
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:13,
Reply)
BATTERED IS BEAUTIFUL ON THE INSIDE ALRIGHT(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:18,
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In that case it should have been the b-side. 'You're a short angry prick'.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:19,
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the original lyrics (tune remains the same)battered fucking stinks
he fucking stinks, it's true
i've smelt his breath
and it smells like death
now i don't know what to do
'cause he really smells like poo
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:48,
Reply)
WE HAVE SUN**non-angry obv.
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:23,
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\o/I have yet to see this tattoo
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:32,
Reply)
It is sacred.By sacred I mean 'fucking shit'
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:33,
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Can't find a pic, thought I had one somewhere(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:49,
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I dont even have a tattoo yet(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:46,
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Not a single one, nor a piercing(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:51,
Reply)
he posted a cartoon version of it a while agobut never the the actual beast
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:35,
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I'm backing up a guys laptop just found a bunch of pics and vids of his girlfriend naked and masturbating. Not bad for a Thursday
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:35,
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Prettier than the lass who was giving her bloke a blowy in the library(
Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:04,
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Well you have gone suspiciously quiet...taken the laoptop to the bogs have ya?(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:40,
Reply)
No need nowThey are downloaded onto his phone
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:41,
Reply)
seriuosly though PJ's been gone a whileI hope he hasn't choke wanked himself to death
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:44,
Reply)
Oh sorry no,I was still watching 12 angry men. and being paid for it.
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:03,
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I found a CD of granny porn in a work laptop, once.Gave it back to him. Told him the next one I found I'd give to his boss.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:48,
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I've found a lot of porn on work laptops both homemade and internet grotand I just give in back without saying a word. I would never consider grassing the poor wanker up to his boss.
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:04,
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Neither would I, really.Doesn't mean I want to see it, though.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:05,
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There was only one occasion where I grassed a guy up and it still makes me fucking angryWas fixing his laptop and needed to open a file again, clicked open resents and a list appeared with things like "12yrs-old-lolita" "hardcore-cp.jpg" etc etc. I shut the lid took it straight to my boss who took it to the police. A week later it came back. I was given it back and told to finish the job as no kiddie porn had been found. I browsed to resents again right clicked and info. He was viewing them from a USB key or DVD. I discovered another guy had found loads in his recycle bin a few months previously but he restored it and the dates on the files changed, he kept quiet because he was scared that it would look like he put it on there to set the guy up. 4 years later and the nonce still works here. Came into my office this morning, makes my fucking skin crawl.
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:10,
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The police obviously didn't take that as worth following up.He just walked in to the office again so I'm going for tea.
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Peej, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:12,
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Unpleasant.I once had a copper march into my office and demand that I took copies of a website. Seems the girls in the school across the raod were taking photos of themselves, sending them to the boys in the school I worked at who put them online. None of them were over 16. Dunno what happened with it after I handed the disc over.
Not a nice day at work.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:13,
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Shit angry sun complete with highlighter coloured in face for reasons which escape me.
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 14:57,
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Yeah it, like totally means life and spirituality and, like stuff yeah? I'm so deep and individual (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:00,
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i saw a middle aged man wearing "gap yar beads" yesterday(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:01,
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i bought him something from hotel chocolatthat is all i meant. honest.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:04,
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sometimes i dosometimes he buys his own meat. even though he is outnumbered by vegetarians 2:1.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:09,
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he's just jealous because on him it would be knee height(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:03,
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as you know, if i cared what people thought i wouldn't have posted it(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:04,
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Frog is probably the last person on this planet to be jealous of. Folkestone, fat ginger gf, manky tats, etc. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:05,
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maybe he could go to a soft play centre to perv over other people's wives instead(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:08,
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i see why you whisked yours out of the way(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:09,
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it's oki've bought you some pocket sized binoculars for your bbq!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:14,
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I want to invite Kroney but I don't want you two spoiling things by having an argument. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:16,
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he'll turn up so late we'll probably have gone by then anyway(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:18,
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I take it by the way you've worded that you assume Frog is invited as well?he is BTW.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:20,
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no, i meant everybody elseyou'll like frog. monty and stunned have adopted him.
which is great when he rolls in at 2am totally out of his box.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:20,
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It's not official until you have touched the tips of your cocks together(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:30,
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are they still bich fighting?Why not simply give thema platform to fight it out, maybe take bets
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:18,
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I don't want blood stains on my patio. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:18,
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poor kroneyIt's weird when people fall out and are too stubborn to make up
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:20,
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Particularly as I like them both IRL. Don't tell either of them that though. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:24,
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It's on the 8th, right?I'll be moving house that weekend; thanks for the thought, though!
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:22,
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I thought you were moving the weekend before?(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:24,
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I'm moving out of my current place next FridayThen I'm on holiday for a week and moving into the Chiswick gaff that weekend.
Couldn't have timed it more aggravatingly if I'd tried.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:25,
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You're moving to Chiswick?That's my old neck of the woods
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:28,
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Surely you'll be done by Sunday afternoon?(
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:32,
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Dunno, mateDepends on how draconian the mrs decides to be over unpacking. I coudln't give a fuck if stuff stays in boxes for a couple of days, but you've got to help out!
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:33,
Reply)
We shall discuss this nearer the time. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:41,
Reply)
If I'm going to be under one of your thumbsI'm going to choose the thumb attached to the boobs. Soz, mate.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:43,
Reply)
You haven't seen mine recently darling. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:47,
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I've not seen his missus, but I would hope hers are better than yours(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:48,
Reply)
Does it glow under ultraviolet light? It looks like it should...
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:06,
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I haven't had a new tattoo for 16 years, now is the time!!(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:10,
Reply)
Get one of your budgie* * not a euphemism.
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:11,
Reply)
I feel the same about tattoos as you do about marriage - never again.The difference being I *could* get another tattoo
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:12,
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You could have your cock coloured in with glow in the dark ink. That'd be fucking awesome!
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:13,
Reply)
it'd be like one of those sticks that they use to wave aeroplanes down the runway(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:15,
Reply)
Even better... Could you imagine a power cut on a tube train? You could help restore order. With your cock!
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Muns, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:18,
Reply)
Like one of them fluorescent tubes*dinkdinkdinkdink DINK*
*screams*
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:28,
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I'm very easy-going and hardly ever get annoyed.Alt: When kids fall over and hurt themselves.
Altalt: *winks*
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:22,
Reply)
ask me about how benefits should be calculated (
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:23,
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You'd bother calculating them?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:23,
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out of my fucking bonus, it seems60% tax.
SIXTY PERCENT TAX. what's the point, eh?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:26,
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We should return to the 95% rate of the 1960s(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:27,
Reply)
Removing the upper limit on NI contributions was a sneaky move. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:28,
Reply)
it's one of those stupid reverse loopholes, like if you earn £100 - £120k, you pay a higher rate of tax than someone who earns £120,001 upwardstypical fucked up labour policy that makes no sense.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:32,
Reply)
That awful Labour partyLuckily the Tories removed it when they came into office four years ago, yeah?
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:35,
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which bit of that do you think is incorrect?www.telegraph.co.uk/finance/personalfinance/consumertips/tax/10828657/Tax-system-flaws-leave-professionals-paying-60-per-cent.html
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:36,
Reply)
the 'higher rate' is only on the 20k between 100 and 120.Someone on, say, 140 will pay 20% on the first 42 or so, then 40 on the next bit up to 140 (assuming no pension conts). At no time is 60% the marginal rate or even the rate on whole income.
The telegraph are misleading you.
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:41, Reply)
but they still earn more and yet pay tax at a lower percentagethis is the bit that does not make sense.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:51,
Reply)
How does the 40% you got to keep compare with the minimum wage?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:28,
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it was earned by working my arse off, sometimes 7 days a week, giving up nights out, holidays, weekends...(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:31,
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I'm sure it was, but that wasn't my question(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:32,
Reply)
Well we need some figures mate, what does the average minimum wage slave get as a bonus?(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:32,
Reply)
I would assume that if you are on minimum wage, you are unlikely to be receiving any bonusesApart from the bit of swipe's that goes towards your housing benefit
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:33,
Reply)
Oh, well I would say in comparison it's better.(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:35,
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So what is she moaning about?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:38,
Reply)
I'm guessing: with a fucking enormous bonus(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:29,
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absolutely not, i am not a bankerit was a very generous gesture on the part of the firm to reflect some really hard work, but a few thousand. not a six figure silly level bonus like some people get.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:31,
Reply)
Not a partnership though, is it?(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:32,
Reply)
Should've thought of that when you kept both X chromosomes, instead of converting one to a winning Y(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:37,
Reply)
there is nothing more depressing than getting your bonus letter, getting excited and then seeing how much you've been raped i tax(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:37,
Reply)
I imagine opening a letter to see you've had your benefits cutbecause somebody on more yearly salary than you're likely to see in a decade has lobbied to have their tax rate cut, would be a bit of a downer, too. Especially if it means you can't keep your six guaranteed-to-turn-out-as-car-thieves children in Iceland frozen burgers.
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Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:40,
Reply)
yeah, but seriously though I wanted to go skiing(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:50,
Reply)
Get paid via Cyprus. Just sayin'. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:42,
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i need more details on this for future plans(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:50,
Reply)
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. * pauses for breath *
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
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Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:37,
Reply)
Because you'll never make partner in your current firm. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:39,
Reply)
it's perfectly possiblebut not at my level, i'm still too junior
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:55,
Reply)
But it must take your overall pay bracket somewhere between 100,000 and 140,000so you're not exactly hard done by are you.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:38,
Reply)
Didn't you read?She works REALLY hard
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:40,
Reply)
I've never understood this argument.It's as if nurses don't work hard, or that if someone cleans the streets really, really, really hard they ought to be paid 500K a year.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:51,
Reply)
even you can't think that this policy makes sense(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:46,
Reply)
No, you're quite right - you need the money more(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:47,
Reply)
No I don't, I'd rather they simplified the system and said up to £10,000 tax free, up to £50,000 20%, up to £100,000 40% up to £1,000,000 60% and maybe above that 65%, or possibly not bother. But also make it apply to any income regardless of whether it's shares, or paye or earnings from renting out your property or whatever.
The complexity is where it is possible to fiddle the sums to pay very little tax when earning obscene amounts. It's wrong when someone earning a million pays proportionally less then someone 40K.
But equally, if your take home pay in a year is over 100K, you're doing pretty fucking well and shouldn't complain too loudly.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:50,
Reply)
40% is finei don't have a problem with that. and i agree with most of what you say re any income.
but 60% is demotivating. who would want to work that hard when they are giving 2/3's of it away?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:54,
Reply)
Exactly how much harder does someone earning £500,000 work than someone earning £35,000?I imagine they probably sit in an office, probably a nicer office, and have someone to bring them coffee, probably nicer coffee too.
The job they do may be judged to be worth that much more, but what are they actually doing that is so much harder that it deserves a near exponentially greater (I'm being figurative here) degree of reward?
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:02,
Reply)
It's more to do with the level of responsibility the job carries, be that responsibility for securely employing others, shareholder return etc. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:04,
Reply)
it's not just about working hard, and you know it, although that is a part of ityou get paid for your skills too. not everyone can be a brain surgeon. that is why the top consultants earn so much money.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:07,
Reply)
They do, they earn very high salaries and pay a reasonable proportion of that back in taxWhat they have left allows them to live a very nice lifestyle, not rich beyond the dreams of avarice, but very comfortable and without many worries, assuming they don't have gambling habits or crack addictions.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:11,
Reply)
but it's earnedit's not given. eg today i should really be in bed, but i'll be here til about 9pm, and i was at my desk by 8.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:54,
Reply)
but then some pricks nicks more than half of itdoesn't seem fair really
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Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:00,
Reply)
Are you suggesting that Swipe has paid over £50,000 in tax this year?Because if you are, I might remind you that you are a bent spastic.
And wrong to boot.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:03,
Reply)
personally i would make bonuses under £5k or so tax freethey are incentives. bonuses for bankers etc are part of their salary, and should be taxed accordingly.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:08,
Reply)
And so is your bonus, so it is taxed accordingly.Don't think of it as a 5K bonus, think of it as a 2.5K bonus. 2.5K you say? Wow, that's a lovely big sum of money. I could go on a really nice holiday for two weeks with that kind of money. An unexpected two week holiday all paid for? How lovely, what a bonus!
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:13,
Reply)
or GIMME BACK MY WEEKENDS AND EVENINGS, IT'S NOT WORTH ITnext year i might not work them. then nobody gets anything. well done, government. way to motivate people.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:28,
Reply)
You seem unhappy in your job.You should probably have a good look at your life and think about doing something that actually makes you happy.
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:29,
Reply)
i like my job v muchbut it's extremely demanding. maybe everyone with demanding jobs that pay well should chuck them in. the country would do just fine then.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:34,
Reply)
Are you not well paid for your demanding job?You seem to be, maybe if you don't feel you are well paid enough you should work harder, or move to a job that's better paid. That would seem the sensible thing to do, right?
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Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:38,
Reply)
maybe i should shit out 3 crotchfruit and hold out my hand instead?
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:50,
Reply)
Do you have any idea how hard it is looking after kids?(
Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:54,
Reply)
imagine if you put in all that effort, all those late nights and missed social occasions and everythingand someone took 60% of your kid's love and thought you should be damn grateful to get the remaining bit. what would you think of that person then, eh?
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:57,
Reply)
that does not answer the entirely serious question that i posed in any way(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 17:05,
Reply)
I think it says a lot about you that the comparison came so easily to you.(
Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 17:08,
Reply)
Also, as I'm leaving London in the next couple of months, are you ever going to come for burritos?(
Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 17:09,
Reply)
YES!!! get it sorted.clendrix should come too!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 17:12,
Reply)
and when you build in council tax, VAT, fuel duty, alcohol duty etc etc it probably will be more than 50%(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:04,
Reply)
But why would you do that?I mean, the only reason to try and tie in a series of totally unrelated issues would be to try and cover up the ridiculous assertion you made with distorted figures right?
(
Bazongaloid, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:09,
Reply)
well of course that can happen, but it's relatively straightforward to plan one's affairs to minimise personal taxes and maximise tax free allowances.No doubt your IFA can advise you on this for a fee.
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:12, Reply)
there's an effective 60% rate on earnings between 100k and 120k, due to losing the personal allowance by £1 for every £2 earned over 100kYou can avoid this by making gross pension contributions of the amount in excess of 100k, which will then receive tax relief at 60% while your tax remains at 40% in that portion.
You're welcome.
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:34, Reply)
Yeah, might place you on ignore for an hour or so(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:35,
Reply)
you have the power to delete all of this man, and deletion is for winners(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:40,
Reply)
It's all about the timing though(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:42,
Reply)
good, did i see al pipe up a moment ago? it's close....(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:42,
Reply)
Yeah, he's on my sideI'll wait 'til we've reached maximum NOT UPSET
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:43,
Reply)
I've actually got loads of work to do somewhere else, but I can't be bothered to get up(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:45,
Reply)
I'm going to the pub shortly, but would happily stay to help decimate the majority of this thread,(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:47,
Reply)
You love a bit of lolitics(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:48,
Reply)
I'm not so sure about it now, Al has just made a really good point.(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:52,
Reply)
I've been in the pub for nearly 3 hours. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:48,
Reply)
I have a 2nd viewing on my house this eveningthen I'm off to the pub
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:50,
Reply)
my dad started going on about this but i can't spend it until i'm about 55 at that rate. fuck that. i want a holiday. i need it, because i work such fucking long hours!
(
rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:36,
Reply)
you get preferential treatmentYour contributions attract at least 40% relief but you'll probably become a basic rate taxpayer in retirement. Do the maths, yeah?
(, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:38, Reply)
Get Frog to knock you upYou'll get a really long holiday then.
(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:39,
Reply)
I read it as "I can't afford a holiday on the other 100 grand I earn, despite having no real outgoings"(
Kroney, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:41,
Reply)
You cant spend it at all now thoughIts fucking gone
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:43,
Reply)
You can't handle yurt roof(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:50,
Reply)
Really? Nothing for this?etc.
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:00,
Reply)
I forgot to buy the Daily Mail for the free Lego:o(
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:51,
Reply)
Does whatever a spidertwat can(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:18,
Reply)
i was reading about this the other day, but you siad it better than i ever could you debonair financial copyeriter you(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:36,
Reply)
I, for one, am squeaking contentedly having read this. (
Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:38,
Reply)
The waaa is strong in this one(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:56,
Reply)
i've got some chocolcate fudge cake to celebrate(
Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:57,
Reply)
We keep getting cake deliveries from our implementation teamcoconut and jam!
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:00,
Reply)
hIYA!Im still busy and very important.
Might have a scan through these thread later.
Missed much?
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:08,
Reply)
TAX CHATNew job going OK?
(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:08,
Reply)
Yeah, cheers. Very busy and stressful.This week seems like it's lasted for 2 and I dreamt about work last night :(
Still, got myself a nice pay rise for my troubles.
(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:36,
Reply)
UPSET^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 15:57,
Reply)
I am so upset I'm leaving the Internet and going for a pint to calm down (
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Thu 15 May 2014, 16:09,
Reply)
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