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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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HSH Wednesday


Come on, come all, to the hump day Home Sweet Home thread.

Just don't step out of line, or...

Well, nothing much'll happen really.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 7:29, 312 replies, latest was 17 years ago)
Hey LiC
just got home.

I'll have tea then come back. Behave yourself now y'hear?

How are you anyway you jolly chap? let me guess...... hungover?
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 7:36, Reply)
I'm off to work early today
So I can maybe get something done before I'm in a meeting from 9:15 to 12:30, after which I've got the afternoon off.

Should be a productive day...
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 7:39, Reply)
I never drink two nights in a row VC
That would be bad for my liver.

See you in a bit!
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 7:39, Reply)
*crickets chirp*
*tumbleweed rolls past*
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:39, Reply)
Oh you're back then are you?
good to know.
I'm feeling like such a bogan right now. Trackidacks, big woolly jumper.... comfort bliss....
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:41, Reply)
Good moaning
You here by yourself Light?

I have to do some web design today, but I'm going to try and get out of it because it's boring and I don't like the woman I'll have to work with.

Edit: bogan?! Trackidacks?! Speak English!
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:42, Reply)
sorry User
(I have a feeling you might be mr Devil Tightly).

Bogan - someone who is more concerned about comfort over style,

Trackidaks - umm polyester tracksuit pants? I don't know how to describe them.
www.comparestoreprices.co.uk/images/unbranded/s/unbranded-sloe-joes-trackies.jpg
that's a basic pair of trackdaks.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:47, Reply)
morning tkic, vc and user...
got building control coming to site at 9.30 to check out my stairs...
and i have a k cider hangover...

bleh.

have a nice day,

B69 x
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:48, Reply)
good luck to you mr bazzer
hope it all goes well. Darn hangovers.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:49, Reply)
i are absolutely certain that the stairs are cool...
after all the work etc! you knows it x
(I helped save b3ta! blaireau69 , the Cumbrian Travis Bickle., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:51, Reply)
Morning All
I'm waiting for a cab to King's Cross to get the train to Brussels yet again.

Good news for you guys though, I should have a nice quiet day of posting to HSH tomorrow as long as none of the kit dies.
(bill, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:52, Reply)
Brilliant
just what I need - another person to help distract me from chemistry study.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:54, Reply)
Heh, I guessed what you meant
Just like a bit of casual racism over my first cup of tea in the morning.

Why do people think I'm DiT?? I'm not...

Morning bill & blaireau.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:54, Reply)
It's like magic
The moment you draw attention to the quiet it gets noisy.
Morning all!
I have 3 hours of Computer Misuse Training this morning. I'm assuming that's "preventing" rather than "getting away with".
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:54, Reply)
then who are you?
stop making my head hurt. You're as bad as my chemistry text book.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:56, Reply)
Telling you who I am would defeat the purpose of setting up a new account!
Suffice to say you'll know my previous name, definitely. I just fancied being incognito for a bit.

Sounds joyous Light, hopefully you will pick up some tips on how to misuse them as well!
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 8:58, Reply)
Morning gentle folk
I'm on annual leave and rather than fester in bed I was up by 0800, why you may ask?

Because the motherrfucking cat demanded feeding and licks, shoves his nose in your face and eats the wife's hair until someone - Anyone will get up a feed him.

I shoulda got a gerbil. Anyhoo - How be tricks?

Ps - A bit late now but thanks to the magic of Ross Noble I was aware of bogans :)

Edit: www.youtube.com/watch?v=qGPyFy8JOWw
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:02, Reply)
Morning all
User I think you may be BK, I'm sure you are male!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:02, Reply)
well
I'm a country girl. I was born in the city but I belong in the country - cities are okay for a few days but they're so noisy!

I've been resisting as long as I could but I officially give in to the power of trackiedaks and big fluffy woolen jumpers.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:04, Reply)
Male: yes, BK: no.
Where is he though? I haven't seen him for ages...
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:04, Reply)
he's been around
conveniently enough when you're not here :P
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:07, Reply)
Off to see
an orthopaedic consultant shortly. Hopefully my seriously fucked up wrist will be sorted out. It's been cacked for 16 months and counting. Fucking ligaments. At least it isn't lumps on my bollocks.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:14, Reply)
could be worse
you could be stabbed..

you're weird

how'd you hurt your wrist?
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:15, Reply)
Morning fuckfaces
Today is my Friday and then I have 6 days off! (inc the weekend...) WOOOOO time off WOOOOOO and picking my car ramps up later! woo woo woooooooooo

I'm very excitable today
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:15, Reply)
Best of luck Porky
A working wanking spanner is all a gentleman needs :)

Edit: Morning TBG - It's like having Tigger come bounding in except on speedballs
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:16, Reply)
Oh not BK
Then I think you may be not English.

Chemistry Vampy, just remember don't look at the flame when burning magnesiun in pure oxygen, it hurts.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:17, Reply)
but it's fun
and I like damaging my retinas. It can't hurt more then reading some of the posts on b3ta.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:18, Reply)
Morning all...
How are we doing?
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:18, Reply)
Thanks Spunky
If I was on speedballs now I would be running around the office going WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:19, Reply)
Good thanks PB - And yourself?
That'd be a sight to see - A speedballed up TGB, mashed off her tits and doing train impressions ;)
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:21, Reply)
My train impressions are awesome
*writes Virgin on her side for a cheap laugh*
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:22, Reply)
Some bunch of cocks
tried to hack my mail server last night.

What a bunch of retarded script kiddies try to get root access with the username of "michael"?

Meh, otherwise I'm all good.

How are we all? Much happening in the land of B3ta?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:22, Reply)
I'm good
Despite the fact Mum is going into hospital this morning for major surgery. And VC- isn't bogan a racist term for an aborigine?

Whatever you do though, don't turn into a dole-bludging hoon :P
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:23, Reply)
TGB
you're funny. I like you lotses. you make me smiiiiiile. :)

EDIT: eerrrr no - not that I'm aware of? Its just a derogatory term for lazybuggers here as far as I know of.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:23, Reply)
Morning Ethelred.
@TGB. Is there an announcement instructing people to 'Mind the gap'?
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:24, Reply)
@VC
Wrist was injured when I fell over running for a bus. All 16 stone landed on the one wrist. Split the scaphoid and mangled most of the ligaments. It was 06:30 though so no-one saw.
Except the bus driver.
He laughed cos it wasn't the bus I wanted (he wasn't in service). Damned Jedi bus drivers.
FML.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:27, Reply)
Morning Spunkybub
Has anybody got much planned for today? (Other than TGB's ramps)
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:27, Reply)
Spunky
Yup then I shout all aboard. The punishment for not having a ticket is quite severe though
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:29, Reply)
Retina damage is funny
It's why I now need to wear glasses.

I was watching a thing on V about Honey Badgers last night, they can nuetralise viper venom, stuff that would kill a man, they just sleep it off for a couple of hours.

Honey badgers are AWESOME.

EDIT I'm sure I had a ticket somewhere Badger.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:29, Reply)
All badgers are awesome
FACT
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:32, Reply)
Badger
You are allowed to keep Eurasian Badger as pets. How AWESOME would that be!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:33, Reply)
TGB's ramps?
Are we being naughty?
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:34, Reply)
Are we ever not being naughty?
Aww I'd love a little badger, I'd call him badger badger and teach him to maul my housemate
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:37, Reply)
Oh yes indeedy!
Naughtiness abounds like abounding naughty stuff - I saw a link on those honey badgers too ... Mean lil bastards they are.


Hope your Mam's OK PB.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:39, Reply)
Badgers are cool, they're hard as fuck!
I got attacked by one once when I was walking home pissed up, it was pretty dark and it was in a hedge so I didn't see it. I think it'd been run over or something, it was already covered in blood and feebly (although still quite strongly) sank its teeth and claws into the bottom of my jeans and my leg.

Fortunately I had a knife on me so I was able to put it out of its misery. Quite sad though, I like badgers.

I ran one over once as well (different badger to this one!), looked in the rear view mirror and saw it ambling off to the side of the road looking pretty unconcerned. You should've seen the dent it put in the front sub frame!
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:41, Reply)
For the record,
Username1 is not me.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:42, Reply)
hahaha!
Although I recall someone else once telling that story... argh who was it who was it who was it

Oh wait I don't care because I'm getting some ramps getting some ramps *dances*
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:43, Reply)
I will confirm that I am not Kaol
Although I am another country boy that likes knives.

I don't go round torturing animals for fun btw, putting it out of its misery was honestly the best option. It was completely fucked, poor bastard.

Edit: I'm pretty sure I haven't told that story on here before. Someone else may have had something similar happen, but this definitely happened to me.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:44, Reply)
By jingo,
I think I've got it!

EDIT: Might've been my story about killing a cat that got hit by a car so bad it looked inside out?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:45, Reply)
Yeah
They'll attack anything, including big cats.

Don't know where you'd get one, I'll have to look into it, I wand a couple of skunks next, or a Racoon, but I can't have one of those :(

Yeah Kaol, we know you're not User, I think he's Scottish.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:45, Reply)
I've
never seen a real badger.
Or a squirrel.
EDIT:- or a skunk
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:46, Reply)
I can't seem to
shake the feeling that username1 is the artist previously known as Son of Sam-i-am
(I helped save b3ta! rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:47, Reply)
Vampy
That's terrible. I used to go to school with a bloke who had never seen a cow other than on TV, and also never been outside of London! Poor sod.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:49, Reply)
VC
You should be extremely glad that you've never seen a real squirrel. Evil little bastards that they are...

www.b3ta.com/questions/animalsattack/post32578/

Completely true BTW...
(I helped save b3ta! rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:50, Reply)
rubberduck
Kaol just gazzed me saying that as well; it's certainly not the case!

And I'm definitely not Scots either Dok :P
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:51, Reply)
Yeah...
sam had a badger story... User I am going to call you Sam now whether you like it or not. So there.

DUCKIE! Where's my oranges?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:53, Reply)
Good morning everyone.
How are we all?

The only kind of badger I've seen in real life is one that's very fond of good grammar.

I did see a wombat once though and felt the need to screech "MORTAL WOMBAT" and "FINISH HIM!"

People gave me funny looks :(
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:55, Reply)
they always seem so cute in pictures
/grins

aha ducky that sounds so bad!
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:56, Reply)
TGB!
When I got back from Seville I unloaded them into a corner of my workshop, planning to pick them up the next day.

It seems though that my night shift felt the need to stave off the scurvy. The bastards ate most of them before the next day :-( I got the last laugh though - they all got a serious case of arse-gravy.

I've still got a few though...
(I helped save b3ta! rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:56, Reply)
Call me whatever makes you happy!
:P
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:57, Reply)
I don't think I want any
if they are going to give me arse gravy :(
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:58, Reply)
I
think it was the quantities involved that caused the looseness...
(I helped save b3ta! rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 9:59, Reply)
smoke time
WOOOOOOOOo *runs around*
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:00, Reply)
The 10.03 train to Leamington Spa
is now departing.

All aboard.

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO :)
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:02, Reply)
Now Badger
Has turned into a Steam Train.

Oh not Scots, mmmmmm I'll have to put my thinking cap on.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:02, Reply)
Oh my god!
I really wanna listen to that, but I'm bloody at work *shakes fist*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:03, Reply)
Kaol
Listen to what?
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:11, Reply)
Oh not again!
It vanished.
*frowns*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:13, Reply)
I'm not going mental
I promise :(
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:14, Reply)
aww kaol
have a hug.

/huggles.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:15, Reply)
Not completely anyway
I see'd it too
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:15, Reply)
Cool!
T'was obviously deleted for a reason, so we shall say no more on it.

So... Everyone ready for the new Kaol Black story tonight?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:18, Reply)
Yes yes yes!
I'm also ready for my cat to stop chewing on my arm.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:19, Reply)
I haven't read
the last two or three :p
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:19, Reply)
I wouldn't mind a honey badger as a pet (otherwise known as raatels)
Or failing that a couple of meerkats. I could have hours of fun comparing them in a Russian accent.
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:21, Reply)
That's because you're a little retarded...

(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:22, Reply)
That's because they
are so dull my brain tries to forget they exist
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:24, Reply)
Haha!
Yeah, that too.

*plots*

I wonder if you can spike a drink with 'em...
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:26, Reply)

I'm confused now...
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:27, Reply)
*pats head*
It's ok lad, everything will be fine.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:30, Reply)
Good good.
I FUCKING HATE ASP.NET!

Just thought I'd share that with you all.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:31, Reply)
Er...
I'm imagining a mesh made of vipers now, thanks for that :|
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:32, Reply)
Ha, I'd never thought of it being a snake
I always pronounce it ay ess pee, as it's an acronym. Don't even know what it stands for though, all I know is it's fucking gay and I hate it. I don't like making websites.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:34, Reply)
Well, there ya go,
A tiny glimpse of the world as I see it.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:35, Reply)
So, username1
has IT roots, or footing.

Are you Labia?
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:36, Reply)
No,
He's not.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:36, Reply)
Lab isn't lame enough
to change his name
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:37, Reply)
I'm not Lab
I am a developer and database tech, although I sometimes get roped into updating the company website. I try and avoid it though.

I code in Pascal using Delphi, and most of my databases are FoxPro, if that gives you any clues? :P
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:39, Reply)
Are you Spak?

(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:39, Reply)
Nope!
He's more of a web monkey isn't he?
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:40, Reply)
Er, I dunno.
I know he does "computerating-stuff".
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:41, Reply)
Hmm
*Dons tin foil thinking cap*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:43, Reply)
Why do you all care!?
We obviously didn't like him in the first place if he had to change his name! Which is why my first thought was he was the stig :p

hahahahah
*offers internet cake to the stig*
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:44, Reply)
*is extremely offended that anyone thinks he's that prick*
Nah, you all love me under my other name!

I still post using that but not as often as I used to, posted a few things using my main account yesterday if anyone wants to play detective...

Just fancied being anonymous again.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:46, Reply)
If you're offended by that then
you really shouldn't be here :p
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:46, Reply)
I'm quite hard to offend
But being mistaken for a misogynistic egotistical cock on the internet will do it every time!
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:49, Reply)
Well I can confirm
It isn't me. However, username1 is not the stig, the posting style is all different. And it isn't Woodside, as it's not northern enough.
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:52, Reply)
Oh Noes
It's Al or JMG!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:52, Reply)
yeah
cuz posting stylez are well hard to change
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:53, Reply)
JMG? Woodside?
Sod off, you think they care enough?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:55, Reply)
I'm a /qotwer, not /board or /talk
Don't know why I'm giving you clues if I want to remain anonymous though!
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:56, Reply)
Yes I would have to agree
With The Grammar Badger, it is very easy to change your own posting style.

I have done it on many occasions during my life with the Thrill Kill Kult.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:57, Reply)
'cos you
Loooooooooove the attention.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:57, Reply)
Fuckety fuckety fuckety fucksocks!
This morning I decided that the hair was too unruly and I should stop procrastinating and lop it all off so last night I charged the clippers and this morning set to work.

Then the cunting clippers stopped working. I'm now sat here with an 1/8th of a skinhead and the rest is sideshow bob hair.

My lovely better half has taken pity upon me and made a mercy trip to Argos for a replacement set. But not before hooting with laughter.

Nicky Clarke and his inferior clippers can suck my fucking balls.
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:57, Reply)
Hmm
who is a big ass attention whore...

Well I am but it's not me....
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:58, Reply)
It's easy to change for a time
Like adding smileys to the end of sentences. Eventually though you end up lapsing back into your old style.

Although I am concerned about what will happen here when /talk closes. Should be interesting!
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:58, Reply)
Bert.
Or Al.

EDIT: Piston you mongo, /talk isn't closing!
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:59, Reply)
/talk isn't closing
that's a big pile of wank
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:59, Reply)
@username1
Are you me?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 18 Mar 2009, 10:59, Reply)
Proof:
b3ta.com/talk/6004325
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:00, Reply)
Yes he is PJM
I know this because he is not me.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:01, Reply)
Nah it's not PJM
the rants aren't eloquent enough.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:02, Reply)
Yes PJM
I am you! What would you like for your prize?
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:02, Reply)
*checks self*
No, it's okay. Just a false alarm.

Prize? Hmm....

*ponders*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:03, Reply)
Badger
It is not, because they would all just migrate over to here. Just think of the carnage that it would cause.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:04, Reply)
What?
what? Dok what are you on about
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:06, Reply)
@username1
Have we at any point exchanged bodily fluids?
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:07, Reply)
If
/Talk came over here Badger, very messy it would be.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:08, Reply)
FFS,
/talk isn't some black pit of illiterate 12-year-olds.

I don't understand the weird rivalry, most of 'em are ok, most of you are ok.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:09, Reply)
Only about
1% of talkers annoy me which is probably less than the amount of qotwers...
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:10, Reply)
it's messy enough here as it is
what with the lesbian chocolate custard wrestling, TGB flirting and motorboating Al, and well just mentioning Al seems to say it all...
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:12, Reply)
Hmmm
Is Rob lying to the /talkers then? Well, apparently he was. Hehehehe.
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:14, Reply)
Well...
Lying =/= throw-away joking comment.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:16, Reply)
PJM
Exactly how many /QOTWers have you exchanged bodily fluids with?!
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:21, Reply)
Morning children
*Adopts stern parental tone*

Stop arguing over whether /talk is closing. It's not worth it! Otherwise I'll take your pooters away.

*wags finger*
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:21, Reply)
*dances*
I'm going to have a subway for dinner

DG I was being good can I keep my pooter pweeeaaaaaze
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:21, Reply)
@ Spunky
That sir, rocks mostly.

I did indeed laugh at your misfortunes.

'lol' is needed here.
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:22, Reply)
DG,
It's not. I proved it.
Anyway, I like /talk, it's funny.

So... Question Of The Day!

What's the greatest invention in the history of mankind?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:23, Reply)
Ning

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:23, Reply)
ning to you clennymajig
*doffs hat*
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:24, Reply)
@username1
Erm... Definitely more than one, possibly more than three...

*blushes*
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:24, Reply)
@Kaol
The bicycle.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:25, Reply)
*Pats Badger on head*
*Good Badger, you can have a lolly*

/Talk may be funny, but any time I go over there it doesn't seem to be, unless al or MM are having a sparring match.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:25, Reply)
those
little half ball things you turn inside out then they pop up into the air and you go WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

Oh a wowwypop fwank oooo mr davros sir
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:26, Reply)
@Kaol
Panty liners with wings. FACT!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:26, Reply)
PJM
The irony of your two consecutive postings!

Mwhahaha!
(Ethelred is watching cheese grow, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:26, Reply)
Bicycle?
I'm gonna go with "knives".
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:26, Reply)
We need names PJM!
Maybe I've exchanged bodily fluids with someone you've exchanged bodily fluids with. That'd mean we were practically related.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:27, Reply)
I'm going to go out on a limb
and say PJM has exchanged fluids with Kaol as Kaol has a tendancy to snog men at bashes
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:28, Reply)
Planes
Namely cos they let you visit far away places.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:28, Reply)
And as for great inventions
I'd say electricity, or the generation of it, since it was discovered rather than invented really.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:28, Reply)
Not with me he doesn't!
I'm practically old enough to be his Father! The very thought...
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:29, Reply)
For the record,
I haven't snogged PJM.
EDIT: Yeah, or you, DG.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:30, Reply)
Sounds like you're
jealous you haven't had some Kaol lurvvvin DG ;)
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:30, Reply)
In response to Kaol's QOTD
It's obvious. The answer's b3ta.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:30, Reply)
Really?
I'd rather have a knife than b3ta.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:31, Reply)
Jealous?
Moi? Never.

Besides, if we did our flappy coats would intertwine and we'd probably trip and fall over. Best not to take the risk for fear of looking uncool.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:31, Reply)
@ Ethelred
I actually have a photo which I may be obliged to add because even I found it rather amusing.

The good lady wife has phoned to say clippers are en route - Woo!
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:33, Reply)
My coat's in retirement
At the moment, got a gigantic hole in it.

And I can't sew.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:33, Reply)
I did offer to repair it...

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:35, Reply)
Yeah!
Then I got drunk and lost the needles and thread :\
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:36, Reply)
haahahahahahahahaaaaaaaaaaa
www.whichisgayer.com/compare.html?w1=kaol&w2=clendrix
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:49, Reply)
Still no nearer to uncovering username1's alter-alter ego
username1 isn't me.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:34, Reply)
PICTURES
or it didn't happen Spunky
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:34, Reply)
Kaol
that's very sad. Where's the hole? Lining, or coat itself?
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:36, Reply)
Er,
Join in the leather.
It's fixable, I'm just massively lazy.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:37, Reply)
Phew
The loss of a beloved flappy coat would be a trauma too hard to take!
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:43, Reply)
I think it's more
your giant sausage fingers which make it impossible for you to thread needles
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:43, Reply)
Yeah, t'would.
*looks at time*

Fuck it, I was expecting about 12:30.

EDIT: Hahaha! You love my giant sausage-fingers.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:44, Reply)
*winks*
what girl wouldn't
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:50, Reply)
Woo!
There's wavy lines coming off the car outside my office window.

If it's like this in 3 weeks time I'll be a very happy bunny!
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:53, Reply)
Sausage fingers and no fingernails
Kaol opening a can - hahahahaha

I forgot to add this to the Kaol list the other day.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:53, Reply)
What Kaol List?
*panics*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:54, Reply)
I wondered why he
always bought bottles...
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:55, Reply)
Well...
no sense of direction
fifteen minutes to send a five word text
can't open cans

what use are you?
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:55, Reply)
Oh wait...
you're fucking good at hugs
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:56, Reply)
And
he's gayer than you clenders. Don't forget that.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:56, Reply)
Greatest invention/discovery ever?
Simple. Clunge.
(I helped save b3ta! jim_bob can herd cats., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:57, Reply)
Kaol
The answer to the QOTD is Soap!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:58, Reply)
Oh my god!
Soooooooooooooo much gayer!
I only just saw that!
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:58, Reply)
DG
You're right! The Internet said so :)

I'm, like, not gay at all. Haaaaaaaaahahahaha.

^Info further up...
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 11:59, Reply)
Night folks
love you all
/huggles everyone just slightly too long.
(Poppet some assembly required., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:07, Reply)
Does everyone agree it's entirely reasonable
To go and (as slowly and painfully as possible) murder the person who is sending me emails in 14pt pink Comic Sans?

It's making my brain hurt. And she's sending me lots of emails.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:19, Reply)
Hmmm...
Easy solution.
You're colour-blind.
Tell her that you need them in black.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:21, Reply)
Kaol,
giving easy solutions in preference to inflicting pain? Are you alright?

Afternoon all
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:26, Reply)
There's an even better reason
which is that if you have to print these emails out, the light pink they're written in comes out as a very light grey on the black & white lasers we use, and makes it virtually impossible to read. After multiple demonstrations of this fact she still refuses to believe the truth of it.

And it's Comic Sans, for the love of God! It must be stopped! Probably with FIRE, it's the only option guaranteed to succeed.

Edit: afternoon flesh...
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:27, Reply)
I'm fine.
Just on probation.

EDIT: Cave her fuckin' skull in with a house-brick.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:27, Reply)
oooh
I'm telling Clendrix on you!!
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:29, Reply)
Go on then.
She can't stop my awesome GAY POWER.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:29, Reply)
gay power?
something you WANT to be celebrating?
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:33, Reply)
Might as well.
*shrugs*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:34, Reply)
well
in that case, gay power it is.

btw - any more recommendations for music?
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:38, Reply)
Er...
You liked Monster Magnet, yeah?

I'm not sure, I've been listening to lots of Soundgarden, Pearl Jam and Faith No More lately.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:39, Reply)
Monster Magnet yeah
I've had the latest Metallica and Motorhead on my MP3 pretty much constantly lately, but need something new. Soundgarden and FNM I'll check out I think
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:41, Reply)
@Kaol
Monster Magnet, aren't they a crunchy corn snack.




Oh hang on. I'm thinking of Monster Munch : )
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:43, Reply)
Good stuff.
I'd recommend "Superunknown" by Soundgarden, and "King For A Day... Fool For A Lifetime" by FNM.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:44, Reply)
The identity of username1?
*Strokes beard thoughtfully*

Veering slightly off topic, but I think that username1 might be Son-of-Sam-I-Am.

It was the coding reference that made me think that.

*EDIT* or Axai... could be Axai.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:44, Reply)
Monster Munch
I found them in a supermarket here, and was incredibly disappointed with them. Nothing like I remembered, not even the pickled ones
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:47, Reply)
Pink Comic Sans?
An abomination!

I got a mate this poster, but in colour for Christmas. He was well chuffed.

Afternoon peeps! I am back from my training and fired up to hit my previous employers and anyone else I can think of with Subject Access Requests under the Data Protection Act.

Check out www.ico.gov.uk !
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:48, Reply)
Kaol is King of the Gays
I shall take him to Hampstead Heath over the summer and let him play with his friends.

edit: flesh, really? They were exactly how I'd remembered them.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:53, Reply)
perhaps
it was cause they were imported, and thus a lesser product.

either way, not worth the money
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 12:59, Reply)
I had some a while back
and they were as I remembered. Except smaller.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:02, Reply)
^sizeist

(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:04, Reply)
Yup
Sue me
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:07, Reply)
bit slow keeping up
And I can't be arsed to find out what the original request was but Superunknown and King for a Day, Fool for a Lifetime are two of my favourite albums.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:19, Reply)
Lazing on a Wednesday afternoon
Woo! Afternoon off! Yay!

*off to make an epic sandwich*
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:27, Reply)
not quite the same
but I'm having Wednesday *evening* off. I have absolutely nothing scheduled - it's going to be blissful, lying on my ass time tonight!
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:32, Reply)
I have tomorrow off
I hope the weather will be as nice as it is today it's luuuurvly out
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:34, Reply)
jesus
have you ever turned your keyboard upside down to shake the shite out of it?

I did just now, and have almost a sandwich worth of crumbs - it was fucking full of stuff.
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:36, Reply)
Jesus just called
and said no because he has a fancy keyboard that doesn't have gaps between the keys.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:38, Reply)
I don't have any time off
between now and Easter, but I hope it's this glorious in 3 weeks time...
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:43, Reply)
damn you jesus
and all your fancy technology

*shakes fist*

Jesus, where do I get one of them there keyboards
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:45, Reply)
Being a carpenter by trade
He probably made one out of wood.

Mahogonay, I would think.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:51, Reply)
Jesus
has this it's ridiculously cool

He's moved into the 21st C DG!
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:55, Reply)
Jesus.
Did someone call me? Dammit, people why don't you use the JesusSignal!

UPDATE: I've now been invited out for a company paid meal and alcohol. Aaaaaargh, I wanted an evening in to recover from several consecutive late nights not to add another one!
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:55, Reply)
Blimey!
It floats as well.
(I helped save b3ta! Davros' Granddad a voice of calm reason in a world of spastics., Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:57, Reply)
Indeed
I walk on the waters.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 13:59, Reply)
So...
You taking the free booze option?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:01, Reply)
I've turned it down
but I will probably be able to change my mind later on this afternoon if I get a second (or even first) burst of energy.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:05, Reply)
Ah, free booze
I might actually not get drunk tonight.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:07, Reply)
You're a far stronger man than I.
Free booze is my biggest weakness.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:08, Reply)
Followed by
cheap booze
followed by
inexpensive booze
followed by
reasonably priced booze
followed by
pricey booze
followed by
expensive booze
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:09, Reply)
Free booze is pretty high up my list too
I have no shame in absolutely caning it in front of colleagues. Which will lead to a hangover and it will lead to another night of not getting to bed before 1am.

Internally my body is slapping the beer loving part of me and saying to it, "Don't you fuckin' dare say a word!"
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:11, Reply)
Er...
Yeah, actually.

Although you missed "bullets" and "cheap cigarettes" from the list.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:11, Reply)
mmm free booze
my boss handed me a bottle of Wolfblass Shiraz earlier woot woot
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:14, Reply)
I was going to mix in something non-booze related
but couldn't think of anything appropriate
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:14, Reply)
TGB
Isn't that half-price at the moment?

*checks*

Oh no, that's the Cab Sauv. Carry on.

Is it the Platinum Label? That's quite nice.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:17, Reply)
"appropriate"?
This is b3ta.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:18, Reply)
Chains if you can afford
300 squid bottles of wine I'll marry you tomorrow
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:20, Reply)
@badger
I can afford a £3 bottle of Bucky. Does that get me anything?
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:21, Reply)
Er...
Gut-rot?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:22, Reply)
^hahah
You can have an internet kiss *kisses*

Wow don't you feel special
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:25, Reply)
TGB
It's £300 for *6*

So one bottle is only £50. Much better.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:28, Reply)
Afternoon all
I've been busy rebuilding computers here at work. This is being done on the sole understanding that these computers will find there way into peoples houses. Not started on any of the portables yet mind you.

If anybody has a way of bypassing the Windows Logon could they tell me, it's really pissing me off!
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:29, Reply)
@s
Kaol - hahaha.
TGB - whythangyeverrverrmuch. I'm special :D
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:29, Reply)
Be careful there...
Many varieties of "special".
Hope that you've not got the "cross-eyed, wanking aggressively at old ladies on the bus" kind.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:32, Reply)
oh
I just saw 300 and went ARGHGHGHHGGHGH and then closed the page.

And yes you are DJ. With your lovely flowing locks and lovely thighs
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:32, Reply)
awwwww
Thanks TGB.

*has a cross-eyed wank in celebration*
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:34, Reply)
Have a spunk covered hat

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:45, Reply)
OH COME ON HSH
Very slack today. Soon I will be MIA for two whole weeks - I expect more than this to remember you by while I'm gone.

What's your favourite body part (your own, Kaol, not one you've ripped off someone else)?

Mine is my thumb.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:51, Reply)
well, it was quite an aggressive one
and directed at an old lady. Very worthy of a thread kill.

Fo' real.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:51, Reply)
Clendrix
eschewing the obvious rejoinder, I'll choose my tongue because I like the taste of stuff.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:52, Reply)
my boobs
obviously
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:53, Reply)
i guess
I can't answer that then clendrix - none of my body parts are mine - I'm a walking transplant factory
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:53, Reply)
My brain.
Flawed though it is, it makes exciting things happen.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:54, Reply)
I have two
My legs and my bum, they are what I concider the best parts of my body. Other people do as well.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:55, Reply)
I think the favourite bits should be donated to make one b3tan.
flesh, you'll just have to choose a random bit :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:56, Reply)
A sup3rb3tan?
Hmm... Dok I'm going to pass on your ass it doesn't compliment... well anything...
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:58, Reply)
I like my teeth

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:59, Reply)
Haha!
A superb3tan with my brain?
Good luck, Earth.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 14:59, Reply)
Dok
Assuming you mean XP, if there is only one user and no password defined for them you will not see the logon screen, it will go straight into Windows when you boot. But only if you're using this sort of logon screen.

If you've got the classic logon prompt like this (quite likely if the computers have been part of a network) then you will still see it even when there's only one user, with no password.

So you need to set it back to the default XP 'my first logon screen', I can't remember how to do this though and can't see any of the relevant options on this PC since I'm part of a domain. If you're running XP Pro I think you can do it through the group policy editor. It should also be in Control Panel/User Accounts but my User Accounts page looks completely different and the only way I could get back to the default one would be by leaving the domain, which would be a pain in the arse...
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:00, Reply)
You ARE Sam-I-Am

(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:01, Reply)
I'm not!
My computer fu is far superior to his :D

Oh, and my favourite body part is my large Jewish looking nose.
(username1, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:02, Reply)
Thanks User, I'll have a look at that.
Badger, that is you perogative, though many have commented on how nice it looks in tight trousers.
(Herr Doktor Lemminge Is bored, so cheer me up!, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:04, Reply)
well, in that case
I'll pick my rather fetching ladies fingers
(bamboozled Can hear you getting fatter, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:05, Reply)
Your fingers
Have killed the thread.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:24, Reply)
those
thread killing fingers

ooh great minds chains ;)
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:24, Reply)
*passes on the slightly messy hat*

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:28, Reply)
Bonjour Avec Bruxelles!
Hopefully means what I think it does.

I've just finished installing a new video encoder at the EU council building and have checked into my hotel. 1/2 an hour to kill till happy hour in the bar so I thought I'd swing by any say hello.

Hopefully all your days are going well.
(bill, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:29, Reply)
hello with Brussels?

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:31, Reply)
Hello with Brussels!
Best of all the Christmas Veg.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:31, Reply)
hiya bill
*waves excitedly*

avec is 'with' I think. Isn't it sur or dans for 'from' or 'in'.

That I'm not certain highlights exactly how worthless a 2 in Standard Grade French is.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:32, Reply)
bonjour des brussles
I think...
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:34, Reply)
Think it's "a" or "aux".
Aux. 'cos it's plural.
I think.

*shrugs*
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:35, Reply)
I think the phrase Bill is looking for is
hello you twats.
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:35, Reply)
Isn't there a b3tan
called Bruxelles something? Maybe he's out there banging her or him.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:35, Reply)
Afternoon Bill
I am someone's sockpuppet account, I just came up with the name and wanted to try it out.
(The Light in Chain not really, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:37, Reply)
I think
the phrase I'm looking for is
shut the fuck up Kaol a country is not a plural
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:37, Reply)
Nice name Om Nom
I agree with whoever suggested "Aux". But I got a C in O-level French a looooong time ago.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:38, Reply)
Hmmm...
Valid point.
Think it's still "aux" though.
Well... YOUR FACE IS A PLURAL NOUN.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:39, Reply)
I'm putting money on....
HLT
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:42, Reply)
Why, god-fuckin'-dammit,
Won't my office stop vibrating?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:46, Reply)
But the "Daddy"
implies it's a bloke, doesn't it? Or am I being slow?
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:46, Reply)
I chose to ignore that bit
and you are slow Chains. go read your special book with the colourful pictures and big letters
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:47, Reply)
Ethel The Aardvark Goes Quantity Surveying!
Woohoo!
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:48, Reply)
R is for "Retard"?
I love that book.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:48, Reply)
I'm off to the shop
for some wine. I just have to figure out something else I need so I don't look like a filthy wino when I just buy wine.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:49, Reply)
Pasta!
Then it looks like you're cooking a romantic meal.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:51, Reply)
Get me some washing powder

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:52, Reply)
Washing powder?
Nah, that's dull and more expensive than pasta.

Just get wine, painkillers and a pack of rubber gloves.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:56, Reply)
but I need it :(

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:57, Reply)
Hello again sexyfaces.
Soooo
How many b3tans are going to be in New York tomorrow?
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:57, Reply)
That's a good idea
not the pasta, that's a stupid idea.

But washing powder - it's not like it goes off or anything. I could have an extra box no problem.

Ooh, kitchen roll, same principle.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 15:57, Reply)
*wanders back in*
Lusty!
By Friday we'll be so far apart I won't know what to do...
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:01, Reply)
SHUT UP.
THE PASTA IS THE BEST IDEA EVER.
Why do you ask for advice, then shun it?

Hi Lusty!
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:01, Reply)
so my French sucks!
I guess I deserved that E grade for GCSE.

DJTP, I'm not here with Brixton Bruxelles* although that is almost exactly the journey I made today.

*named after a musician's cat, can't remember who's.
(bill, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:01, Reply)
@The Light in Chains
Gannets! I don't like them, they wet their nests.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:01, Reply)
I'm going to be in NY tomorrow
*stalks*

¬_¬
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:03, Reply)
Bill
you suck.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:04, Reply)
Sometimes TGB,
Depends on what and how much I'm getting paid.
(bill, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:07, Reply)
Clendrix,
Don't you worry your pretty little head.
Our love will cross oceans.
Everytime I look at the stars I'll think of you and take comfort in the fact that we're still under the same beautiful sky.

Except when I'm off being penetrated by Mounties covered in maple syrup, because then I'll probably just be thinking about how nice it is being penetrated by mounties covered in maple syrup.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:08, Reply)
@bill
You're definitely shagging someone in Brussels though, I can taste that specific musk in the air. I think we all can.

I'm on to you.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:09, Reply)
Lusty
Fairy Nuff
:)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:10, Reply)
*wipes tongue*
eww so that's what that is

Lusty I put a little camera in MiniTGB so I can be with you all the time
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:11, Reply)
DJTP
Unfortunately not, maybe someone else on the thread is giving off the scent.

*Looks around suspiciously*
(bill, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:13, Reply)
Nobody else in here
Is in Brussels though...
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:16, Reply)
TGB
That's very sweet and not at all creepy.
(I helped save b3ta! wanderlust, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:16, Reply)
Kaol
Do you do a new comic every Wednesday?
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:18, Reply)
*stokes beard pensively*
I have a beard again. I'm sure you're all excited to learn this.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:18, Reply)
Thanks Lusty
that's what I thought
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:18, Reply)
Yeah, why?
Well... I missed a few weeks for various reasons.
The new story starts tonight though.
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:20, Reply)
I'm doing one
Just figured if you do Wednesdays I'd do a different day to avoid being trampled beneath a horde of squealing Kaol groupies.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:24, Reply)
I think most of those screaming people
are running away from Kaol...
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:26, Reply)
Well, I do Wednesdays,
And post 'em about 2am Thursday morning.
To be fair, it only gets about four comments each week, and one of them will be bert saying "this is shit".
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:27, Reply)
I made a blogspot
and put one comic up already.

I'll probably give the address out Friday.

(although it might not be that hard to find).
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:29, Reply)
I'm going to go explore
It feels a little too early to go to the bar so I'm off for a wander around.

Catch you lot later.
(bill, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:30, Reply)
wow wait
Did Bill just say it's too early to go to a bar?! You've changed bill *shakes head*
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:31, Reply)
I don't always remember to comment on the comic
but I always read it and I've saved them all :)
(I helped save b3ta! thealternativefact, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:33, Reply)
Those blogspot things,
Are they easy to do?
And can I have my own fonts on 'em, or would I have to stick 'em in as images?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:33, Reply)
haha
this is easily my fav Charlie Brooker rant so far

www.guardian.co.uk/commentisfree/2008/jun/23/fashion.monarchy
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:33, Reply)
It's easy to make a blogspot account
and then there's lots of built in templates.

I just uploaded my comic as a png (there's 1GB of space so I should be alright for a while).
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:35, Reply)
Why a .png?
I'd just have mine as a thumbnail link to the image on b3tards, due to the image dimensions. That'd work, right?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:37, Reply)
I don't see why not
But this way I upload them on the blog and that's it. You can choose to display it as a small, medium or large image *and it automatically displays that size as a link to the fullsize image*.

Writes code and shit. I dunno, I don't really know much html. I press the Image button on the WYSIWYG post editor.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:40, Reply)
Hmmm...
I'll give it a go.
So... what's your comic about?
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:42, Reply)
It's about a super sexy
badger who fights injustices against grammar
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:43, Reply)
...
Bet it isn't, TGB :P

.ǝɯoɥ ɟɟo ʞɔnɟ uɐɔ ı 1ıʇ, sǝʇnuıɯ 51 ...ɯɯɯɥ
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:44, Reply)
The Grammar Badger says without pictures it never happened
I direct you dear folk to the Off Topic front page.

>Awaits ridicule<
(SpunkyMcSpunkbubble Diddled your nubbin on, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:47, Reply)
Well, if you look at
Red Meat, it uses cut-and-paste a lot to cut down on the artwork. A friend copied a lot of the images and wrote a site to allow you to make your own Red Meat comics.

Ideal for me because I cannot draw at all. Plus it's necessarily a very structured format - three panels, one or two characters per panel, who can only say one thing per panel. So you have to really think to turn an idea into a comic. I've got a load I've done over the years, almost all original gags.

So it's about a bunch of disturbed people who live in a disturbed town, hopefully a lot like the Red Meat strips linked above but also with a lot of me in them.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:48, Reply)
5:00!
¡ʇɥbıu
.ʍou ǝɯoɥ buıob ɯ,ı
¡ɥɥɐɐɐɐɐɐɐɐɐɐɐǝǝǝǝʎ
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 16:59, Reply)
Kaol
Why the upside down? I wish it was backwards then I could be like "stop being so backwards"
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 17:01, Reply)
'cos it's cool :p
Bye!
(I helped save b3ta! Cawl, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 17:02, Reply)
cya Kaol
I suspected everyone is off home. Except me, I've been home for hours and hours!
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Mar 2009, 17:26, Reply)

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