I agree with willennium
so I'm starting a new thread.

I can't think of a question that doesn't involve public nudity, so make up your own.

Alt q - ever been nude in public?
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:22, 193 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

Nope. I'm too shy.
I added "go to a nudist beach" to my bucket list in the hope that it might prompt me to man up and do it, but really I just thought I'd put it off for a very long time.

However, I told my bloke about it and he's 'discovered' that the resort we are staying in in Tenerife in September has 2 nudist beaches right next to it, so I might have to put my money where my mouth is sooner rather than later.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:31, Reply)

Ha!
I think most places in Tenerife have nudist areas, from what I'm told. I've done it once, although there was nobody else on the beach at the time, so it wasn't really 'in public' per se. And it was only briefly, to find out what it felt like.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:33, Reply)

Wiggy insists that it's liberating and awesome
I just don't want everyone to see me naked! He said that people don't go to a nudist beach to look at naked people, but you can't not look, so that's bollocks. Plus with camera phones being so tiny nowadays I might end up on someone's sodding facebook!

He's an exhibitionist, he got out of the shower and was thrusting his nudity in my face so I ignored him and told him to go outside and water the plants, which he did without putting clothes on. We live in a block of flats...
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:38, Reply)

It's an unusual feeling
It feels quite normal, except for the fact that you can feel the breeze on bits that normally don't get the breeze! And that in itself is quite pleasant.

As for looking at naked people, remember that everyone looking at a naked person is naked too, so it's a level playing field. I'm not sure I'd feel comfortable though.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:40, Reply)

I always just think that people will be all "eurgh"
even though there are plenty of people fatter and saggier and pastier than me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:21, Reply)

Mark's the same
I have to force some clothes on it before he goes to the balcony naked every morning.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:12, Reply)

I wouldn't trust nudist beaches on Tenerife
they're more like mixed beaches, if you want, you go nude, if you don't, you keep your clothes. They can be full of pervs.

Go at night, when it's dark, and hava a swim naked. There's no better feeling like that, specially if your boy is doing the same and you get to hug him.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:11, Reply)

Wiggy said there was a mixed nude and a private nude beach near the resort
I reckon they'll be full of pervy old men trying to see young women naked.

EDIT: ooh, I like the idea of midnight skinny dipping, that's on my list too
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:24, Reply)

Yep
I've been in plenty of mixed nude beaches and I always keep my clothes. Girls usually do, and it's only guys that get naked. It's a bit disturbing to see them playing beach bolley or tennis like that.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:35, Reply)

meat and veg swinging in the breeze

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:49, Reply)

So damn sexy
or not... no, really... when it's all flaccid is not nice.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Public nudity for me, means I take off my Crombie.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:36, Reply)

And your scarf?

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:44, Reply)

Only in winter

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:52, Reply)

Not in full public
But I've developed a habit of walking round pretty much naked whenever I'm drunk at house parties. I've had people take my underwear off too, only to be shocked when they discover I don't care.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:36, Reply)

*makes mental note for next bash*

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:39, Reply)

To not go near me?
As I said, house parties.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:06, Reply)

The last bash was a house party at BGBs, did you get naked?

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:25, Reply)

Nope, I managed to control myself
When I say house parties, I should have said parties at mine, whoops!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:30, Reply)

fair enough, it's your house

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:34, Reply)

I bought a slow cooker
and I've cut up a load of meat and veg and stuck it in with stock and everything else I could think of. I've got the afternoon off so I can check it then. Unexplored territory for me!

That's my make up your own main question.

altQ: I guess the gym changing room doesn't count. So no, except in those really horrible dreams.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:36, Reply)

I thought you had to start the cooking in a normal pot and then transfer it to the slow cooker.
I have a feeling you are going to be eating warm botulism this evening.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:38, Reply)

Surely that defeats the object of a slow cooker?
As I understood it, you bung everything in there in the morning, go to work, come home to delicious tea.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:41, Reply)

The heating element is only about 100W, and in some cases is a lightbulb.
You get it boiling and then sling it in the slow cooker. The tiny heat keeps it just simmering.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:43, Reply)

fair enough
I don't actually know anything about them.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:49, Reply)

That's not true
You get it proper boiling, but it takes time, and you shouldn't open the lid often. Usually it has two settings, the strong one at the beginning if you're in a rush, and once it starts boiling, you can put it down.

I use it all the time, it does boil. And I'm not dead.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:15, Reply)

Thanks, slow cookers have improved since I had one then.

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:18, Reply)

I love mine
and food tastes soooooo good.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:35, Reply)

Depends on how hot the slow cooker gets
If it's 70° or above, then it should kill most bugs, I think. And I can't really see it being much less than 90°C.

But I'm willing to be corrected.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:41, Reply)

I know you are smart K2k6, but the problem is getting it up to that temperature.
The heat energy is barely enough to maintain temperature against the heat losses.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:47, Reply)

Oh I see
I've never used a slow cooker, so didn't know the mechanics of it.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:48, Reply)

I guess if TLIC is posting tomorrow, he can tell us if he is shitting his ring or not.
He's gone very quiet, even now.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:50, Reply)

Botulism kills quickly...

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:51, Reply)

Should we start a collection for some flowers or something?

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:53, Reply)

*buys wreath*

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:56, Reply)

*forgets to chip in*

( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:13, Reply)

I was travelling to work
Most things said just to bung it all in. Certainly not to have it boiling first.

I'm worried now.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:18, Reply)

Aberracion will take responsibility for your death so get cooking
Perhaps try something without meat first.
( Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:22, Reply)

Just give it plenty of time
Don't expect it to be ready in less than 4-5h. Mine usually starts boiling after 2h, although I use boiling water some times, if I'm on a rush. If you can, let it cook overnight, while you sleep. Lunch will be so nice.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:51, Reply)

Too late!
But I'm going to freeze most of it so I'll just have a small portion and see how I feel.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:54, Reply)

I hate gym changing rooms
it always seems to be really fat hairy women who like to spend as much time naked as possible and they sit on the benches with their legs apart, lifting up their gargantuan breasts to dry underneath them, it's horrific.

I was getting changed once and the cleaner noticed I dropped my membership card and picked it up for me, then she started chatting to me and was standing closer than normal people do, whilst I was trying to get out of my bikini without flashing her.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:40, Reply)

A German colleague of mine
once expressed surprise that when she went swimming there were so many women (primarily the young, fit ones) who would do their best to cover up in the changing rooms. This struck her as odd, as Germans seem to have no hang ups about this sort of thing at all.

Edit - the cleaner obviously wanted to have a good close look at your tits.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:44, Reply)

Sometimes I wish we didn't have such an embarrassment over nudity
but it would have to be a mass revolution, otherwise I would just become the person who everyone was uncomfortable around because of my brazen nudity.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:51, Reply)

I'm not uncomfortable with other people's nudity
and I like wandering round in the buff myself. I'm just not sure I want to put the two together just yet!

Changing rooms are an odd exception. I've found myself in the nude having a conversation about science with an equally naked colleague without discomfort.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:54, Reply)

There was a programme a bit ago about a load of people going to work naked
I do NOT want to see my colleagues naked. Well, maybe the office junior, she's pretty hot.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:59, Reply)

I imagine it would make for a pretty awkward working environment
And would possibly result in little work getting done.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:02, Reply)

I would just be really cold. I'm cold now.
A woman has just returned from maternity leave and she always insists on having the fucking window open, even if it's winter. I want to say to her "you're only warm because you're so fucking fat!"
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Lucky you
My office is at over 30°C most of the time because the heating's knackered and is stuck on full blast. Were it not for the social acceptance factor, I'd be more comfortable working unclothed.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:06, Reply)

Is this the one that you thought might steal your desk?
If so, did she steal your desk?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:08, Reply)

haha yes that's her
she tried. She said "I want that desk back" so I made out like it was a huge hassle to move and made out like she wouldn't like this one because the sun shines right onto you and makes you really warm. She said I can stay here for a while until she's 'decided' which desk she wants. Hmph.

I was out of the office yesterday morning and I was worried she would steal it when I wasn't there so I made it really uninhabitable. I put loads of really heavy boxes that she wouldn't be able to lift around it, I left loads of papers lying all over it and I moved the shelf so it created a tiny gap to get through, which I can fit through but she can't even get an arm through. I'm so passive aggressive :D
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:17, Reply)

I like your moxy, kid
You make sure to keep up the good fight/petty desk-based fight.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:19, Reply)

Petty fighting gets me through the day
When she was away she had all her emails forwarded to me. Since returning she has forgotten to turn this off. I haven't said anything yet. The longer I leave it the more trouble I'll be in for not saying anything, do you reckon I should?
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:28, Reply)

But the longer you leave it
The more fun you could have too...
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:30, Reply)

exactly
I could find out some juicy information if I leave it, but I could also get really bollocked for it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:35, Reply)

It's a fairly serious breach of privacy
Flag it now.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:36, Reply)

dammit.
fine. You're right, I know.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:44, Reply)

only if she's using her work email for personal use
which you're probably cautioned against in the email and internet policy for your company.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:59, Reply)

well she's now taken over again as the practice manager
so she could be having private email discussions with the partners about things like people's jobs and stuff so it is pretty naughty of me.

She's doing my head in, she's only been back 2 days and she's already bossing me around, forgetting that I've done her job for a whole year by myself.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:14, Reply)

probably just insecure about her job
Now that you've shown she's not indispensable.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:25, Reply)

There's only one or two around here I'd like to see in the nude
The rest are male, old, ugly or combinations of the preceding.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:03, Reply)

Invasion of personal space while mostly naked
Lovely. Yet another reason to avoid gyms.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:44, Reply)

yeah, also the crippling exercise

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:49, Reply)

Damn that exercise
I still mock people who drive to a gym, then do nothing but go on the treadmill.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:56, Reply)

I always wonder about exercise bikes
Why not just buy a proper bike and get out on country roads with it? Assuming you're not a townie, that is.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:57, Reply)

I can't do the exercise bikes, I get tired within minutes
but if I'm doing real cycling I can go for ages, plus the up hill down dale thing is much better exercise.

Running scares me, with all the joint pounding, I worry it'll ruin my knees and ankles. I liked the cross trainer though. There are also those weird machines where you stand on the two paddles that move independently from each other and it kind of looks like you're skiing. I can't work those either, I can't get the rhythm right so I just end up spending the whole time trying not to lose my legs out from under me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:02, Reply)

I can't do running really
As my knees start to get sore after not very far. Plus you get somewhere far quicker with a bike.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:04, Reply)

Oh, that's what a cross trainer is!
I've never been to a gym. I prefer swimming as my form of exercise.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:04, Reply)

the skiing thing isn't the cross trainer,
although I suppose it is a bit like skiing as well, so my description is rubbish. The skiing one I was describing goes out to the sides rather than forward in an elliptical motion. It's supposed to tone your ass, but I just can't work it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:20, Reply)

Imagine you're at glastonbury
wading through shin-deep mud. I think that's how ypu're supposed to do it, I know those women you sometimes see doing it really fast are doing it wrong.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:02, Reply)

really?
there was a bird in my old gym that used to do it lightning fast for the whole time I was there, she was always sweating buckets. I thought she must be hardcore.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:15, Reply)

compare with slow sit-ups and fast sit-ups
slow ones are much harder so you end up doing the same amount of exercise for a given time. But doing it superfast makes you more injury prone.

Aim for a solid slog.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:28, Reply)

oh yeah that's true
I do slow ab crunches, they're way more difficult. And the bastard plank. IT WILL NOT DEFEAT ME!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 11:01, Reply)

I got bored as fuck in the gym
yet find swimming clears my mind and I can just concentrate on technique without getting bored.

gyms are full of wankers anyway. or if not, you perceive that they are wankers so they may as well be.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:51, Reply)

I love my slow cooker
Just throw everything in, and go to do something else. When you come back, food is ready and delicious.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:13, Reply)

At a party at my house I managed to convince everyone to get in the shower`
and then managed to convince all the ladies to remove their tops. Then I convinced them to pose for photos. Do I win five pounds?
( Peej, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:56, Reply)

Only if you post the photos.

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 8:57, Reply)

B3ta rules say no porn and no shock sites
and one of the girls was a bit fat
( Peej, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:04, Reply)

You could post a link marked NSFW...

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:05, Reply)

they're always the first to strip, tut.

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:29, Reply)

When on holiday in Greece with some friends in 2000
we were lying on the beach in the blistering heat, when Lee (who's a girl, a hot girl) turned to me and asked "Do you mind if Emma and I go topless?"

It's difficult to shrug and acquiesce in a "whatever" type way when your drool is forming a small lagoon in the middle of a Greek beach.

Not a story about me being nude in public, but I'm confident that you'll all prefer this one
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:02, Reply)

I would never go topless in front of my friends
as I wouldn't expect them to do it either, I don't want to see my friends naked, even if they are hot.

I still haven't decided if I dare risk going topless on holiday with Wiggy to prevent triangle boob tan.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:03, Reply)

I agree with the first part
But I do have some seriously hot friends and I'm not allowed to see them naked any other way
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:09, Reply)

Tbh, I've seen most of my mates naked anyway, so it doesn't bother me

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:38, Reply)

How strange
I've slept with about half of my female mates, and seen quite a few more naked.

Why is it weirder to see someone you know naked, but not a stranger?
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 11:04, Reply)

Bear...woods...shit?

( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:04, Reply)

I've been nude at night, on swimming on the beach
It's a great feeling.

I wasn't nude, but had sex at the Rock Wall in Manchester; I don't know if that counts.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:09, Reply)

naughty naughty!
I've never had sex in public, I'm so vanilla.

EDIT: I just realised I'm lying, I had sex in a pub toilet once and I'm so horrifically shamed by it that I must have repressed it. The guy was a twat.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:29, Reply)

was aruined my

I've not had full public sex, tried to in a cubicle in the mixed sex changing rooms of a water park. Couldn't get the right angles, heights all wrong.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:33, Reply)

He did ruin my twat for a while because he shoved it in before I was ready!!
I hate him. The next morning when I gave him a lift back to his car he punched me on the arm and said "cheers for the lift chick".
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:36, Reply)

Ouch
For the first bit. You should have pushed him back and told him to sort himself out or learn some manners!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Exactly!
What's the world coming to when men are no longer courteous or gentlemanly?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:39, Reply)

he was such a massive clunge
I'm still quite bitter about it.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:42, Reply)

You should probably just forget about him
You have a non-clunge guy now, what's the point in dwelling?
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:43, Reply)

I don't dwell on any of the other clunges
I think it's because he utterly humiliated me at work (he was a work colleague) for the few weeks that I was dallying with him, so my pride was hurt.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Poor Kitty's Pride
That's a massive dickmove though, be glad to know that he's currently very unhappy.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:49, Reply)

Don't worry
She can take care of herself
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:51, Reply)

Thanks for using my setup ;)

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:56, Reply)

I thought you'd appreciate it!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:06, Reply)

I like that

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:16, Reply)

Sorry
he was I now have
+I can challenge TGB
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:43, Reply)

haha my vag is self healing
my virginity grew back after that to protect me.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Haha, fair enough!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:52, Reply)

He's a smooth operator

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:38, Reply)

Haha
I once had sex on the stairs to my parents home. I'm so embarrased now of what could have happened! They live in a block of flats as well!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:37, Reply)

I had sex on my boyfriend's parents' kitchen table
because they're quite houseproud.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:41, Reply)

I tried it on my parents kitchen table
She couldn't get comfy, and the thing was swaying so much it made me nervous
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:42, Reply)

It wasn't particularly brilliant sex, it was more to make a point
that they won't ever know about.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:47, Reply)

Same
Also done it in their bed, and their en suite, they'd really pissed me off.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:52, Reply)

I've only had sex in my parents house once
And that was in my bed at the time. Hmm, I'm rather vanilla it seems.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:42, Reply)

Very good!
I've never done anything like that at my parents; my father has a peculiar timetable and therefore there's always someone awake at home
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:48, Reply)

The rock wall?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:39, Reply)

Yes, it was a great club
Closed now :(
It had a lot for dark, hided corners :))
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:40, Reply)

Ahh, fair enough!
You filthy minx, you!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:41, Reply)

After a couple of beers I can't stop myself
and Mark is soooooo sexy!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:46, Reply)

Terrible!
You did seem fairly unwilling to keep your hands off him at BGBs
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:53, Reply)

Had I found a dark, hided corner...

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:54, Reply)

Should have used the cellar

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:56, Reply)

I should have I should
I didn't trust the cats, though!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:02, Reply)

I think they were busy with Crowsephine that morning

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

Yes, but I didn't know until the next day
Had he told me he was going to keep them busy...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:15, Reply)

Then both Mark and Crowsephine would have had their fair share of...
No, too obvious.
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:22, Reply)

He was sleeping/passed out at my feet
And she was getting a bit feisty with him, kissing and all that. I did my best to feign being asleep.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:55, Reply)

He wasn't
Not quite... almost... but not quite...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:03, Reply)

I was just hoping you stopped after a bit of a kiss
My poor gentlemanly English mind would not be able to take it if you rode him senseless at my feet.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:05, Reply)

Again, I apologise
at my feet instead of me
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:07, Reply)

That too

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:09, Reply)

Jajaja!
I don't think I would have done it. Although I had a lot of sangría... But we only kissed a couple of times, only. I remember looking at you and thinking "maybe he's sleeping and can't hear"
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:16, Reply)

I wanted to be asleep
I felt like I was invading your privacy by being awake.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:17, Reply)

It's ok, it's ok
it wasn't your fault.

We had just had a bit of a row and I wanted to sort things out before sleeping. He wanted to sleep and that would sort them out.

Men, you know nothing.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:22, Reply)

And wanking, while crying and screaming the Lords Prayer

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:22, Reply)

I like walking around my flat naked
(with the blinds/curtains drawn), but hate being naked in public, like gym changing rooms. At the local swimming baths, if it's busy, I have to do that awkward pulling-your-shorts-down-while-the-towel's-wrapped-around-you dance.

I'd go skinny dipping if there was nobody (except SO) around, but wouldn't go nudey on a beach, especially not in front of friends! Hell, I have a hard time being shirtless in front of friends.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:29, Reply)

I agree with this wholeheartedly
I won't take my top off in front of humans if I can possibly avoid it. I used to love swimming as well, but the prospect fills me with a healthy degree of abject horror nowadays
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:32, Reply)

Really? Why?
Boys' chests have nothing to hide!

I love sunbathing top-less. It feels sooo good and warm and soft.... mmmm... I'm going to Tenerife in 1 week and I can't wait!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:39, Reply)

I am not as trim/firm as I'd like to be
Therefore am too embarrassed.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:40, Reply)

I'm not firm at all
But I don't mind. The feeling of the sun on my skin is too good.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:41, Reply)

I'll go topless on holiday on the beach
Menorca for 7 days, in just under 2 weeks time!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:42, Reply)

Are you going to the pretty places
or only beach?

Ask for "sobrasada" once there!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:45, Reply)

That's a sausage, isn't it?
We're staying in a quiet-ish resort near Cuitadela, because I hate the Anglicised big resorts, and Cuitadela looks to have a bit of history. We'll do some beaching, and some sight-seeing.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:47, Reply)

Not quite
It's like spreadable chorizo, on toast, with melted cheese on top. Ooooh!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:55, Reply)

And that looks like a great plan
I wouldn't want to say that any of my friends is a proper guire, all red, socks and sandals, stupid hat and beer on hand 24h.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:56, Reply)

No fucking way am I a 'guire'!

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:57, Reply)

Oh, sorry
I misspelled that one, it's guiri.

For what I saw of you, you didn't look like one, but some British change over during the flight, and land as proper twats in Spain.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:02, Reply)

Never ever ever
When I visit a country I try to speak a bit of the language, try the food, see the sights etc. My idea of Hell would include being stuck in a holiday resort that was all English/Irish pubs.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:04, Reply)

I would agree
I have a healthy dislike of resorts which are favoured by Brits.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:05, Reply)

I went to Puerto Del Carmen last year, that was fantastic
No wideboys to be found!
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:08, Reply)

I always tell my friends where to go in Spain to avoid the guiris
and then I fear they'll tell their friends, and the friends of the friends, and so on, until that pretty place is no more a no-guiri place.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:13, Reply)

Don't do it Labs, that's Spanish for buttsex

( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:47, Reply)

Oh man I'm totally getting me some of that!
Que te den por el culo!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:50, Reply)

Jajajaja!
Very good! Careful when you say it, though!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:56, Reply)

I found a site that has swear words for all languages.
www.youswear.com
Most of the ones I've browsed seem alright.

Me encanta tu culo ;)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:58, Reply)

If you want to sound more Spanish
forget the "el" and just say "que te den por culo"

I'll look at that website from home.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:01, Reply)

I'm going to try and pluck up the courage to go topless
but it might take a few cocktails!
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:40, Reply)

Well
Nobody knows you there, what's the worst that can happen? Almost every woman in Tenerife goes topless as well. We don't like sun marks.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:42, Reply)

I have a surprising amount of male friends who don't want to take their shirts off on the beach
and most of them are because they think they're too skinny and pasty. Then I know a couple of guys who work pretty hard at the gym so they take their shirt off at the drop of a hat. If I had a six pack I would do that too though.

I usually get stared at on the beach or in a swimming pool because of my tattoo, but I always think it's because I've got my arse hanging out or a nipple on show or something.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:40, Reply)

If I had a six pack
I'd flaunt it fo' sho'.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:41, Reply)

Honestly, guys
The beach is to enjoy yourself, not to show your bodies! Just relax, enjoy the sun, the breeze, the refreshing water!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:44, Reply)

Oh I'll definitely do that
But if I had a six pack I'd enjoy it more.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:46, Reply)

tru dat
also, if I wasn't a tubby bitch with a really hairy chest and a slightly hairy back.
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:48, Reply)

+getting married to

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:53, Reply)

harsh man, harsh

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:58, Reply)

Sorry, just too easy

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:59, Reply)

Bah, you said you'd lost weight!
Plus I have practically zero chest/back hair, so if I did have a good tan and six pack I'd be sorted. Fuck you, metabolism, fuck you!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:54, Reply)

But that's so wrong!
You weren't fat when I saw you? Why is it imperative to have a six-pack? A non-chubby, healthy figure is very sexy too. Would you think of telling a good looking girl not to go with her bikini to the beach only because she doesn't have perfectly fit muscles? If she's a whale, maybe, but being healthy looking, why?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:59, Reply)

I am kinda exaggerating
But I am fatter than I'd like to be. And I'd never dissuade a good looking girl from wearing a bikini ;)
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:01, Reply)

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:09, Reply)

GTFO
you are a ridiculously long way from being fat.
(berk, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

You're far too kind!
I hide it well is all.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:13, Reply)

I quite agree
I've not got a perfect body by any means, but going around in shorts in the swimming pool doesn't bother me at all. I don't tend to do it so much on the beach (unless I'm swimming) because I burn so easily. But this doesn't help my brilliant whiteness. People have been dazzled by the sunlight reflecting from me!
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:03, Reply)

I have
it's still an ongoing process though

actually, having a hairy chest doesn't bother me, I feel bemused by it
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 9:59, Reply)

I'd be bemused if I suddenly woke up with one
As it stands, I'm glad I don't, even though some women prefer a hairy chest.
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:01, Reply)

I've got a hairy chest
and back, shoulders and pretty much everywhere else too. It doesn't bother me either way.

Fortunately the Mrs likes it.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:04, Reply)

yeah, fortunately my mrs likes it too
and the hair!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

I don't like hairy
At all, appart from head, arm pits and a trimmed bush, the less hairy the better.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:08, Reply)

*waggles eyebrows*
Well hellooooo!
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:08, Reply)

ok, ok
I knew I was missing something. But well kept eyebrows, I don't want a single one, but 2 perfectly differenciated.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

Yes, mono brows are WRONG

( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:14, Reply)

I'm firmly with Labs on this one
Unfortunately all the running and sit-ups in the world aren't going to give me the stomach I really want unless I give up beer and chocolate, and this is clearly not on the cards
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:02, Reply)

As I said to Labia
You wouldn't consider a girl unsexy just because her muscles aren't perfectly fit. Why are you so hard on yourself?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:09, Reply)

Pfft
'Hard on'
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

Hurr hurr
"hard on"
( Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

boys... you're so simple...

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

Yep!

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:11, Reply)

^ this
my bloke moans about having a (small) gut and man boobs, yet he's perfectly happy to overlook my flaws. I've told him the only time I'll care is if his tits get bigger than mine.
(berk, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:12, Reply)

I'm the other way around,
I bully Wiggy for not being fit and healthy, eventually he joined the gym at work. In return he calls me a fat whore at every available opportunity. It works for us.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:44, Reply)

you frequently eat whole apple crumbles and cheesecakes and stuff....

( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:45, Reply)

Jealous?

( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:54, Reply)

if by jealous you mean aroused
then yes
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:56, Reply)

hell yeah
I do work pretty hard to balance it out though.

I might make some kind of cheesecake with a crumble topping.
( Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 11:03, Reply)

that sounds awesome
bring me cheesecrumblecake!
( Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 11:06, Reply)

Chocolate is easy
Ale is the difficult one to give up
( Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:09, Reply)

I could give up beer instantly
I don't like it that much.

Chocolate is a different matter however.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:55, Reply)

I like my beer belly
I can rest things on it whilst I think.
( SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Wed 18 Aug 2010, 10:10, Reply)

I tried it and liked it
... there was a hot tub at a club / party / festival thing in the arches under Kings Cross... I saw a room full of naked rave chicks and thought, "why not?". Possibly due to the massive drugs, of course, but it was fun and I'd like to go public again. It's tremendously liberating!

I'm no adonis, but I'm also not ashamed in any way. I don't expect perfection in others, and don't offer it in myself!
(moon monkey is busy making memories worth repressing, Thu 19 Aug 2010, 11:11, Reply)