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(

rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)

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Tuna omelette with a bit of milk, nutmeg and parsley
and a couple of slices of serrano ham. That's my lunch for today and I can't stop thinking about it. I'm not even hungry, but I want it now.

What do you have in your head that's driving you mad?

Alt Q: Right, ok, I suppose I'll have to... What do you have for lunch today?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:10, 204 replies, latest was 16 years ago)

I have a song
stuck in my head. 'Waking up in Vegas' by Katy Perry, who I think is shit.

Alt Q: no lunch today, unless I can be bothered making some
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:12, Reply)

I hate when those awful songs get stuck on my head
I had the Buttercup song for a while, and I couldn't sleep.

No lunch? Really? How do you do it?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:14, Reply)

I don't really like lunch
if I stopped buying easy to eat food, I'd lose so much weight since I'd never bother enough to cook
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:17, Reply)

Yep
Starvation is a good way to lose waight :) I think we talked about that alredy here, with AA and TGB
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:18, Reply)

tisn't
not eating slows your metabolism down, so that when you do eat your body stores the energy as fat, because it knows you won't eat again for a while. Plus it makes you tired and ANGRY.

/fattyblog
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:39, Reply)

^this
if you want to lose weight just drink less booze and eat less crap. it's not hard.
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:44, Reply)

and exercise a little bit more, but I don't know if you're being intentionally harsh here
some people have slower metabolisms than others
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:57, Reply)

only a little bit
I was a lolfatty for years, and am now not so much.

while all my friends are gaining guts and losing hair, I'm getting thinner and am growing a massive shaggy mop of hair to taunt them.
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:00, Reply)

It's a vicious circle though
Become thin and smug.
Eat lots of croissants.
Become fat; no more smug.
No more croissants.
Become thin and smug.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:02, Reply)

Hahaha

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:08, Reply)

it's tricky
but I'm coping
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:09, Reply)

If the answer is to be smug and to eat croissants
then, from now on, that's the only thing I'm going to do. Right, where are the croissants, scum?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:10, Reply)

The Cat Hater
missed irony completely.

I like my new diet, I lose weight and I'm happy.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:44, Reply)

I only missed the irony because I'm not Fe -ling very well

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:13, Reply)

I suppose you'll get to know me
But I'll tell you because I've seen you doing it a couple of times now. I don't understand word games in English. They mean nothing to me. If I know the word, I'll pronounce it as I was told at school, no accents on it. If I don't I'll pronounce it like in Spanish. Therefore, they usually don't sound like anything else and, for your interest, they're not funny to me.

You're going to have to try harder if you want to amuse me.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:17, Reply)

Ok, I'm taking notes just in case
'Fe' is the periodic table symbol for Iron though, just so you know
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:19, Reply)

Yes, I know that
Then I don't understan. You are not Iron -ling very well?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:30, Reply)

Before you come with the
Iron - Irony explanation, that I do understand, I want to note again, that I read that as Feling, which doesn't mean anything, or Ironling, which doesn't either. Now, I see what you wanted to do and I get the game, I just can't find it funny.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:33, Reply)

oh he crashed and burned
go Aber, go Aber!
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:42, Reply)

Oh, no
You make me sound meaner than I am :)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:43, Reply)

you sound really mean!

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 13:07, Reply)

Does "the running man"

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)

This deserves more credit!
golf claps!
(

sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:18, Reply)

thanks, I'm beginning to think I'm too high brow for this place, my maths joke didn't go down very well yesterday either

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:20, Reply)

I approved

(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:36, Reply)

*makes more notes*

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 13:08, Reply)

unhearit.com/
(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:22, Reply)

NO NEED TO THANK ME

(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:24, Reply)

Despite your gracious objection
thank you anyway
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:25, Reply)

No problem sweet tits

(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:32, Reply)

b3ta.com/links/520898
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:26, Reply)

I'm very disappointed, that's really sticking in my head currently
Alt Q: Depends what the Sandwich Woman has today, if nothing then I'll get a 6 inch BMT on Herb & cheese bread, with lettuce, onions, peppers, gherkins and southwest sauce.

Your lunch rounds far superior, even though I can't quite get my head round a tuna omelette...
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:16, Reply)

How is the house hunting going?
Any luck?

Tuna omelette is superb (can tuna, not fresh)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:19, Reply)

None so far
Viewed a lovely room last night, but it's in a family home, next to the 10 year old sons room. Didn't fancy that at all. I'm still asking round though, as one of the lads I work with is in a house share, and thinks there should be a room coming free soon.
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:23, Reply)

Mmmm
Not a very good idea, eh? Sharing house with a 10yrs old...

I'm sorry I can't help, I don't really know anyone... wait a second... does it have to be Manchester or can it be Chorlton?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:27, Reply)

I'm looking to stay in Macclesfield really, my life is here now
Just wish this was a little easier :-(
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:29, Reply)

Then no, sorry
I don't know anyone living in Macclesfield.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:34, Reply)

my sister lives on a boat in Smacklesfield
but there's not much room.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Cool!
Really? I thought nobody really lived on boats.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:58, Reply)

Aye, she'll be just up the road from me
I know others who live there too
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:01, Reply)

I wouldn't want to live on one
but when I become a dragon I'll definitely have a yacht or two.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:03, Reply)

You're going to have to explain me what a dragon is
Because I thought it was a joke, but you keep saying it, and it's scary now. You don't really think you can become a dragon, do you? With fire and wings and that. You probably won't want a yacht by then, either.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:11, Reply)

oh sorry
there's a programme called Dragon's Den where people pitch their business ideas to four millionaires and try and persuade them to invest. Duncan Bannatyne is one of them, he became a millionaire around 30 from running his own business, he now has several businesses and is worth about £130 million. I intend to do that, so when I say I'm going to become a dragon I mean when I'm a millionairess.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:33, Reply)

Ok
But it was kind of cool to think I'd have a friend in the future who could fly and spit fire.

Can I visit you in your yatch?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:36, Reply)

That's a bit forward isn't it?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:37, Reply)

You have to think about your future, young man
Or it'll catch you with your bottom on the wind

(I think this sentence doesn't have the same power in English)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)

yes definitely
I'm going to invest in b3ta when I'm a dragon so we can all have outings on my yacht.

I'll be able to afford surgery to make me fly and spit fire as well so maybe I will become a real dragon.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Fantastic!
I want to see that. Will you be fighting against villains in your dragon form? Or only against people who you don't like that much?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)

mostly the latter
I wouldn't use my powers for the greater good, just for selfish and petty revenge.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)

I fear for Chompy, then

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:59, Reply)

I know two boat-dwellers

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:08, Reply)

you know
bottom-dwellers. There's a difference
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:13, Reply)

I know a whole website full of bottom-feeders

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:54, Reply)

If you ever pay her a visit and fancy meeting for a pint, let me know
Yes, I'm aware it's likely this will never happen, but there's no harm in being polite.
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

oh it's ok, she's a hateful creature.
I jest, she's not that bad.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:34, Reply)

You dropped this
-Cum-Hardy
(

Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:38, Reply)

no one calls it that.

(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:56, Reply)

I fucking well do
What if the taxi takes you to Chorlton on Medlock instead eh, eh
(

Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:02, Reply)

Really?
I've never heard anyone, least of all the people who live there, call it Chorlton Cum Hardy.

Do you live in Manchester?
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:04, Reply)

Years ago, but still there from time to time
You can see Old Trafford from my Crib, and still got my season tickets. /Chorlton Badboi
(

Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:08, Reply)

I live in Old Trafford on the edge of the city centre
I have friends who are so snobby about Chorlton that when they've moved they still claim to live there. One is in Whalley Range and the other is in Stretford, so apparently Chorlton now covers most of South Manchester.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:35, Reply)

Meh, it's alrite
But only having Morrisons is fucking pikey, and the Hoxton Heroes and Indy Cindys need to be stabbed in the face. Whalley Range used to be good back in the day for lunchtime shootings in Alexandra Park.
(

Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)

Oh grim, tuna is rank.
I think tonight in going to poach smoked haddock and onions in milk, then reduce the milk, and have that on mash with a fried egg on top.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:16, Reply)

Pfff
You know nothing. Tuna is the food of gods, and I eat a lot of it every day.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:19, Reply)

I have a tuna sandwich today

(

TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:46, Reply)

Then, you are a god today
Congratulations.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:59, Reply)

With Mayo or Salad Cream?

(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

yuck, yuck, yuck.

(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)

Bloody right Gonz, tuna is like having a cancer in your mouth

(

Theoban What of it, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:27, Reply)

Even barbecued, rare tuna steak?
Are you sure...?
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:42, Reply)

Or just marinate it with lime and coriander
overnight, then freeze it (to kill the bacteria) and let it unfreeze slowly. Eat it like that, not cook. Better if you have a good knife and can cut it as carpaccio. Mmmmm.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:46, Reply)

Indeed so. I like the cut of your culinary jib, young lady.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:49, Reply)

I can also recommend searing a tuna steak in sesame oil
and serving with stir fried leeks seasoned with five spice and soy sauce infused mashed potato.

that's my signature dish
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:50, Reply)

Mmmm
Sounds great!

I can't have the mashed potato with my diet now, and I'm not sure about the sesame oil, but as soon as I finish, I'm trying this.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:53, Reply)

I tried it at a Japanesse
and the next day we bought 2 massive steaks of tuna from the fish monger. They didn't last as much as we thought they would :)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:52, Reply)

I just bought Original Source Lime and Sweet Chilli showergel
it's weird.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:56, Reply)

I imagine you'd smell
like dinner afterwards. Their mint one is nice though
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:58, Reply)

I use the mint and tea tree stuff exclusively and have for years

(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:58, Reply)

snap
not exclusively, but in preference
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:14, Reply)

I did until my balls had had enough of tingling in the morning.
Stick with Lime now.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:35, Reply)

They did a chocolate one for winter
't was da bomb..
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:02, Reply)

yeah I've got the chocolate one now, it's dead nice.
They're usually all really good so we decided to try this one, but it just smells like those air fresheners that claim to be 'woodland forest' and other such shite.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:05, Reply)

Nice
I'd love to eat some food smelling like that*

*It might not be true.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

Urgh.
I have some hair putty stuff that smells like nice fudge. I find that confusing enough without bathing in tuna marinade.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:11, Reply)

Erm, you do know when you freeze something, it doesn't nesersarlly kill any bacteria, it just makes it dorment.
You need sashimi-grade tuna and let the citric acid in the lime 'cook' it.
(

G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:47, Reply)

'High Horse' by Jim Jones Revue - literally all. the. time.
Alt. something light and healthy - as I have a 'lady friend' coming to dinner and have a blockbuster 4 course meal with grotesque amounts of boozes and doogies ahead of me.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:20, Reply)

I hope you scrubbed and rinsed your bellend

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:20, Reply)

I thought they only rented out videos.
I never knew they did food as well.
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:21, Reply)

1/10 - and I'm being generous

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:35, Reply)

It wasn't that bad?
Was it?
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:36, Reply)

Arguing with the referee, eh?
*reaches for top pocket*
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:41, Reply)

hahaha

(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:42, Reply)

put the whip away Monty
'chastisement' is not necessary
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:45, Reply)

Thank you.
He worries me you know, what with his rages.
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:47, Reply)

You know Jeff, what happened ...
it's not your fault.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

I feel a bit responsible though.
What with me going out, wearing short skirts and low-cut tops.
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:15, Reply)

You old dawg you!
Let's hope this one isn't mental-mental-chicken-oriental
(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:22, Reply)

Mmmm
Blockbuster meal? I want to imagine that you give that name to some take away food that you eat while watching a film, rather than food prepared by Blockbusters.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:24, Reply)

I mean
a culinary extravanganza, lovingly prepared by my own fair hand.

No takeways, no films and no DVD rental companies involved at all.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:36, Reply)

Ok
That's better. I thought you were going to be eating 4 buckets of popcorn.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:46, Reply)

great song
sounds like a pleasant evening

is the ladyfriend Crowsephine?
(

Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:32, Reply)

Fortunately not.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:40, Reply)

A tumour

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:20, Reply)

Nice
Is he your friend?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:24, Reply)

I call him Cesc
and he tells me when to be good and when to be naughty.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:25, Reply)

It's good to have friends like that
Do you play anything together?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:26, Reply)

He is pretty much pulling all the strings.
I like to touch girls bums and blame it on Cesc
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:29, Reply)

I'm sure the girls understand
It's not your fault that the tumour is a bad one.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:36, Reply)

That explains A LOT.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:28, Reply)

Am I wrong to find this HILARIOUS
www.mirror.co.uk/news/weird-world/2010/09/09/champion-killed-in-bird-raid-115875-22547883/
(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:30, Reply)

Chav losing possessions - funny
poor little budgie being raped and killed - not funny
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:34, Reply)

Yes! That's really sad, poor budgie.
There was an article yesterday about an ocean liner that got caught in a really bad storm off New Zealand and they showed the CCTV to illustrate THE HORROR. However, watching people skating up and down the ship as it rolled back and forth was hilarious.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:34, Reply)

(PsychoChomp, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:38, Reply)

You utter cunt
*cries*

Magnificent work.
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:40, Reply)

I saw that
It was brilliant! That bit in the cargo hold though, where that guy narrowly avoids getting nailed by the forklift, that could have been horrific.
(

Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:41, Reply)

I just watched the bit upstairs in the dining room where people were trying to run to safety
and that piano kept nearly taking out the waiter.

And I nearly choked on my coffee when that woman who was struggling uphill to grab onto the pillar then started running towards it at high speed when the waves shifted and she faceplanted it.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:00, Reply)

The woman going face first into the pillar is just brilliant

(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:47, Reply)

yes, this!
so funny.
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:00, Reply)

You are probably wrong to
But I did laugh when I read "7 later died from shock".
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:37, Reply)

Not by my standards, that's cracked me up.

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:39, Reply)

same haha
it's the look of stolid old person combined with perky budgy
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:44, Reply)

I have the song River Phoenix by Trip in my head.
I'm going to have beans* on toast for lunch.

*Obviously with a generous slug of Lea and Perrins thrown in for good measure. It's the only way to do it.
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:21, Reply)

Any cheese?

(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:23, Reply)

It remains an option.

(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:25, Reply)

I like Edam cheese on my beans on toast as an alternative to Cheddar

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:25, Reply)

Did you know that Edam cheese is made backwards?

(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:27, Reply)

I BET HE DIDN'T!!!!!

(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:28, Reply)

Yeah, what a spazz
*belms*
(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:38, Reply)

That's my dad's favourite joke.
And the what cheese can you hide a horse in joke.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:40, Reply)

Mascarpone!
Best read in a Brian Blessed voice
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:48, Reply)

He needs to be knighted.

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:54, Reply)

A PONY IS NOT A HORSE

(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:48, Reply)

Details Schmetails

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:55, Reply)

Dad?

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:28, Reply)

I used to eat beans on toast with grated cheese on top
but now I find the sight repulsive
(

Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:25, Reply)

That's because they should be mixed in!

(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:29, Reply)

Having fully considered your post of 11.23am
I pleased to announce that I WILL have cheese with my beans.
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Good man!

(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:34, Reply)

Or finished off under the grill
/student
(

Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:44, Reply)

I also applied to your comment earlier but didn't see it til the thread had died
Synopsis = I am well, is your mum still interfering? How are you x
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:21, Reply)

Oh, hello!
I'm glad to hear you're well. I had a long chat with my mum yesterday and she promissed she wouldn't do it again. *Sigh*
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:25, Reply)

Happy days. What happened about the mini bus episode?
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:26, Reply)

We agreed we're going to see how many people needs it
and then decide.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:38, Reply)

good for you for sticking up for yourself.
I would have just sulked then whinged on the day.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:39, Reply)

I can't do that
I can't sleep if I'm upset with someone. We talked it very slowly and well, she's right as well that only 5 out of the 100 people of my family that I've invited are coming, so well, 16 of her friends aren't that many after all...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:42, Reply)

Whatever happens the day will be awesome
And you will wake up as Mrs Spanish Lady Mark Von Aberracion.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:44, Reply)

Hahaha
I'm trying to convince him to change our surnames and keep both, but dobble barred. I'm not changing mine for his, for sure, but I want our kids to have both, like in Spain.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:48, Reply)

Do it,
He gets to pick the country you're kids need some heritage.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:51, Reply)

Mmmm... I don't know
I'm not sure were I want to raise them... And he's going to choose Maccesfield or something like that.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:56, Reply)

Spanish name conventions
are pretty awesome. Wouldn't work well in English, mind.
(

Kroney, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:03, Reply)

Because you're still keeping those misoginistic (?) laws
I like the way both surnames are kept in Spain. I'm not losing mine, and it's going to be pass to my kids for sure. I carry them in my belly, I give birth to them, but now daddy gives his family name to the family. No way!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:14, Reply)

Geri Haliwell will have a hard on right now

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:16, Reply)

So will BobbyTheSeahorse

(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:18, Reply)

I always have a hard on
Builders where steel capped boots, I wear steel fronted pants.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:21, Reply)

I'm happy to make her happy
But it's a bit old school and unfair, eh? The fact that as a woman, you go from being the daughter of Mr Smith to the wife of Mr Roberts. Very, very unfair.

And the kids are more mine than his, so they'll have my surname for sure!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:20, Reply)

totally agree with this
I wouldn't change my name on marriage.
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:23, Reply)

Well done!
As we're marrying in Spain it won't be even a question (in fact, they're asking him why he's got only 1 surname, not 2)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:38, Reply)

A colleague of mine took his wife's name when they married
because he's Danish and he has a very common surname they were encouraged by the authorities to help diversify the pool of surnames in Denmark a bit. It confuses things when most people in the country have one of about three surnames.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:30, Reply)

I just think
Dave John Smith Jones Watford wouldn't sound too great, that's all.
(

Kroney, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:17, Reply)

That's a lot of surnames
We only keep 2
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:21, Reply)

Oh?
I read somewhere that it was Given Name, Second Given Name, Parental Surname 1, Parental Surname 2 and sometimes the town or region was tacked on, too. I quite like the idea of having a huge flowery name, but British names aren't often all that great on the ear.
(

Kroney, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:22, Reply)

Oh, well, if you're going to go posh
You can have tons of names. The given names of one of the princes here is Felipe Juan Froilán de Todos los Santos (that's without surname)

We usually go for 1 given name and 2 surnames.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:40, Reply)

Woo!
Three b3tans in Macclesfield, haha
(

Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:55, Reply)

did she disinvite her friends?

(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:27, Reply)

She offered
But I told her not to, as it'd be to put her in a bad position... so they're still invited, but I don't know if they'll come.

I'm a bit dissapointed with my family, as none of them are coming. Can you believe that? 28 years living in Tenerife and they never visited my parents, while we've gone at least once per year to visit them. And now, they all come with "Tenerife is too far, you know?" type of excuse.

We invited around 200 people and only 40 have confirmed, mostly friends coming from several parts of Europe.

People.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:40, Reply)

That's really disappointing
on the plus side, you'll have the people who've made the most effort and who'll be determined to have a fun time.

Now to find a polite way, to ask your mother to ask her friends to lay off the alcohol
(

Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:43, Reply)

I already did that
She promissed they'd behave, and they're bringing partners who will keep them under control :)

The good thing about the family not coming is that, as soon as they confirm they're actually not coming (or if they don't answer at all before the end of the month) I'll start inviting all the friends I wanted to go but didn't tell anything as I couldn't afford it. I think it'll be a good party!
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:50, Reply)

I can't get the Conan The Musical out of my head
www.youtube.com/watch?v=OBGOQ7SsJrw

And today is Chicken Thursday, so KFC. Like a healthy boy.
(

Theoban What of it, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:26, Reply)

The music in my head
It's not always the same song, but there seems to pretty much constantly be some sort of music. Currently, it's Peanut Butter Jelly time.

IT'S PEANUT BUTTER JELLY TIME!
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:33, Reply)

Actually I have Black Sheep by Metric
in my head. Which is no bad thing it is ace.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:34, Reply)

Racist.
What is wrong with white sheep and imperial measurements?

Can't we all live in this world in harmony? Is it too much to ask? Is it?
(

JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:37, Reply)

They're Canadian
they hate everyone.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:38, Reply)

matter of hours
pshshshspshshshs :D
(

Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:52, Reply)

I find myself jealous of you
and I've seen it. You are going to have such a good time. It's kept me grinning for two days.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:53, Reply)

I STILL DON'T KNOW HOW IT ENDS I'VE NOT READ 6 YET

(

Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:56, Reply)

OMFG!!!!!
LIKE WHY CAN'T TIME MOVE LIKE FASTER OR SOMETHING!!!!!!!! *EXPLODES*
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:58, Reply)

or i could go to an earlier showing, like
it's not like I have anything to do.
(

Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:00, Reply)

I have watched the same film at the cinema twice in a day before.
You could be as sad as me.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:03, Reply)

I think in a past life I was a potato
what were you in a past life?
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:37, Reply)

The sperm that made you
I was on massive disability benefits
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:38, Reply)

if you were the sperm that made me then you would be me, are you me?

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:39, Reply)

No you're Bert
I'm Ernie

wanna play with my rubber ducky?
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:41, Reply)

rubber ducky, you're the one
rubber ducky, lots of fun
rubber ducky, I'm awfully fond of you
(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:41, Reply)

so let's fuck?

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:43, Reply)

yes

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:57, Reply)

you have my address
I will be waiting. Bring a mop, a parasol, two dozen brown eggs and some pritt stick.
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 11:59, Reply)

ok

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:11, Reply)

Oh and Bert....

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:14, Reply)

Mmm?

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:16, Reply)

bring your daughter

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:18, Reply)

sure, anything else?

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:21, Reply)

some dvds for her to watch whilst we get it on?
(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:23, Reply)

alright, what about drinks, lube, board games etc?

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:24, Reply)

You win, I'm bored.

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:26, Reply)

ok

(The Cat Hater punch a cow for the planet, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:27, Reply)

do you need a hug?

(

SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:32, Reply)

Pepperami
with a slice of processed cheese wrapped around it.
(Errorist, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:12, Reply)

oh man you're sick!
SICK
(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:17, Reply)

Its a guilty pleasure of mine.
I learnt how to prepare this cornershop delicacy from a guy at uni only known as The Ambassador.
(Errorist, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:23, Reply)

The Ambassador
That is a great nickname! *steals*
(

sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:27, Reply)

Wish I knew where he was now
He did have a certain presence about him.
(Errorist, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:28, Reply)

And he was always good for a Ferrero Rocher

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:35, Reply)

TINY GIRAFFE!!

(

Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:37, Reply)

Wut?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 9 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)

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