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This is a question Public Nudity

Naked people in public never ends well. Ever let your dangly bits go on show? Ever witnessed something dreadful?

Suggested by Spanish Fly

(, Thu 17 Jul 2014, 14:19)
Pages: Popular, 3, 2, 1

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East Kilbride
I was once passing through East Kilbride. In my popular Japanese car and there standing naked in the middle of a busy roundabout was your Mum playing with her massive hard-on.

The vision of her anomalous appendage turned a streak of my hair white and knocked all notions of heterosexuality right out of me. I think it was the girth that was scary.

And like sir cliff is to operation yewtree im now on the run from the CSA and an angry wife.

tldr; yer mums got a massive nob
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 9:22, 18 replies)
that's right
your mother's got a penis
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 9:46, closed)
Don't bother next time.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 9:58, closed)
Struck a chord
Ah, you must be one of the mutants from East Kilbride
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:56, closed)
Best of all the mutants.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:09, closed)
Standards must be maintained
And hors d'oeuvres must be obeyed at all times.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:53, closed)
Wouldn't want to commit a fox pass needlessly
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:44, closed)
Hello new person
I think its great that you are contributing.

Unless you are Baldmonkey...or Frank.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:06, closed)
Thanks nice to feel welcome.

Im none of the above. I take it those two have been punted a few times?

Been waiting a week to post that. chalk one up on the lame board
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:54, closed)
they are gods on here

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:08, closed)
Bit rude.
Where are the mods, when there's genuine abuse to be stamped out?
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:22, closed)
Was it your Mum then?
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:55, closed)
You'll never know.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:07, closed)

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:46, closed)
Hello indeed
nice to meet you
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 10:56, closed)

Click for bigger (82 kb)

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 16:37, closed)
alright baldmonkey Boudicca marshmallow fairholme

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:17, closed)
I liked DVDfever best

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:18, closed)
He's still got to be the undisputed King of Butthurt.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:35, closed)
I like how he looks like the offspring of Richard Littlejohn and Jabba the Hutt

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:06, closed)
Those pricks got no style

Just you wait and see what I can get up to behind your bins
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 11:53, closed)
Stay about from my bins.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 12:17, closed)
I would expect nothing less from the porridge wogs.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 12:48, closed)
Tad racist
But its our country that made yours great so I will let it slide and chalk that comment up as jealous rage

You'll need a passport to get up here after September when we delouse ourselves from the westminister parasite
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:33, closed)
bit needy

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:37, closed)

We didn't sell our NHS to Richard Branson. Will be beating you knuckle dragging simpletons back with a shitty saltire in a few months when you come clambering over the border to escape the tory cluster fuck.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:38, closed)
As anti-Tory that I am, rather 30 years rule of Toryism than one second of the pariah Salmond.
I usually like all the fish.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:41, closed)
Salmond is a slimy wee spunkbucket

Would love to set him on fire. We don't need Salmond or the SNP but we do need to take a step away from westminister regardless

To be clear I do not support the SNP or any other scumbag politician theyre all legalised crooks

My ideal would be to copy the Icelandic model and appoint a government from the general populace with the backing of 30 normal people being the only requirement. Defo not as it is here where they pick from the pot of pedo's and sex pests to make sure theyre all in the 'gang' and newbies wont upset the status quo
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:49, closed)
the general populace?
the flaw here is that the general populace in any country is made up of morons and cunts
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:48, closed)
Sad but true
That's why they keep getting fucked
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:55, closed)
From those houses we can see what we are missing.
Scotland truly is a land of plenty.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:48, closed)
Gem in the crown
East Kilbride is a wee slice of paradise
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:50, closed)
The Scottish are not a race. When your deloused, see you with your begging bowls in 5 years time.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:39, closed)
What are they then?
no bowls required only balls
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:51, closed)
Scottish is a nationality.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:43, closed)
The scottish are something else though
Porridge wogs apparently
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:56, closed)
To be honest anything that Cameron is in favour of, like the genocide in Palestine for example, im the opposite

The fact that he is behind the together campaign is enough to sound alarm bells all over Scotland.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:54, closed)
It's all a front
The conservatives would love you to be independent, it means with the lost votes we'd normally get from Scottish labour and lib dem votes etc we would be looking at a perpetual tory government. They would have won out right in 2010 without these votes.

We definitely don't need the Scottish cash, but we need you in the UK.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:35, closed)
what scottish cash?
they'll have to hand back all their pounds and think of something else... disney dollars, maybe...
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:38, closed)
The joy of independance
Means we can use any feckin currency we like. Bitcoins doing not bad at the moment

p.s. pounds belong to the bank of England PLC not the treasury.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:42, closed)
pretty sure you don't just get to pick a currency and say, "i'll use that"

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:47, closed)
As Dozer proved, you know nothing about money and such like.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:49, closed)
More than you obviously
If you think pounds belong to England and not a PLC
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:51, closed)
It is nothing to do with individual pounds,
And everything to do with control of the currency.

"The pound" isn't anybodies, but is controlled by a set of government institutions, from which Scotland would be separated if they went independent.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:23, closed)
Highly inaccurate

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:30, closed)
you think dozer proves anything???
hahahaha. now do piss off, you pissy little queen.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:51, closed)
That was easy.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:53, closed)
much like you, eh?
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:53, closed)
Miss Glasshouses throwing stones.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:55, closed)
well if you missed them, what's the problem?

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:55, closed)
eh? Banana split, chortle.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:01, closed)
Sure are you?
What makes you sure?
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:49, closed)
no idea, i'm just really bored and making it up

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:51, closed)
Like your style
Canny beat a good bit of shit stirring
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:01, closed)
In her case, any shit is well liked, especially in sex play.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:04, closed)
Bit of a copro?

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:11, closed)

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 16:00, closed)
Rougly speaking
they contribute 106bn out of around 1383bn, it would affect our GDP obviously but not that badly....And yes currency is going to be a big issue and I think they should take your idea about Disney dollars, it's more plausible than the current options.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:24, closed)
Never thought of or intended this site to be a forum for political debate so im nailing the coffin shut on the politics chat.

Will say this before I go however;

Replacing WMD - £100BN
Aircraft carrier with no planes - £62BN
New railway for England - £64BN
London super sewer - £4.2BN
Un-Elected house of lords - £153M
Westminister MPs expenses - £91M
Illegal wars in afgan and Iraq - £57BN
National debt - £1.3TR
National debt interest - £42.6BN

Being able to make our own choices and not pay for any that shit - PRICELESS
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:48, closed)
Just picking one of these randomly
Aircraft carrier - £6.2Bn, not £62Bn. But what's a wee decimal point when you're a havering fuckwit?
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 16:32, closed)
Its all just bollocks off the interweb anyway chief
So bite my banger
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 18:48, closed)
Fit like?

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 13:43, closed)
Shes a hound. From east Kilbride not aberdeen
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:00, closed)
Just testing.
I think you're a sassenach working undercover.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:10, closed)
Not the case
Im defo of the peely wally variety
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:39, closed)
I want to hear about wobbly bits on this thread not wankers so lets leave the political chat at the door
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:54, closed)
I made some jelly they other day
it had fruit in it

phwoooooaaaaaar eh? phwoooooaaaaaar
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 14:59, closed)
Always gets my blood boiling
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:02, closed)

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:31, closed)
jelly pron

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:48, closed)
You're the one who started talking about it, you disgusting Scottish person.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:13, closed)
Backup and read it again dicknut
I didn't start the dick slinging

Go suck your mums cock
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:22, closed)

You started the chat about independence/politics - go and check. Jesus - at least the average IQ of the rUK will jump up.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:32, closed)
they will sting us on tartan, shortbread & jimmy hat export charges you mark my words

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:42, closed)
So its only fitting that i end it then
Now crawl back under your dads pissflaps and begone
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:46, closed)
Feeling that jealous rage burn?

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:27, closed)
Thanks B3ta
For letting me into the community

I have successfully done fuck all at work today and instead have had a right old laff chatting on the site.

Pure quality
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:21, closed)
and you bagged a fartbelm as well

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:39, closed)
pardon ones ignorance
whats a fartbelm?

Does it lose its edge if has to be explained?
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 15:50, closed)
needy ozzie prat who had a breakdown and got banned
he had no edges ... he was dim as fuck and approximately the same shape and consistency as a rotting conference pear
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 16:44, closed)
I'm troubled by how familiar you are with his consistency.

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 17:58, closed)
imagine grabbing a fistful of his greasy old jowls and frightwanking with them.
Go on. Imagine.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 19:09, closed)
'Fright' is definitely the word.
If I grabbed him hard enough he might start sweating into that saltwater pool of his.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 19:46, closed)
I was ashamed to be in Australia when all that kicked off.
Merely by proximity, I felt ashamed.
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 19:54, closed)
No breakdowns from me chief only banter
Guaranteed. Im lucky enough to have regular attention from actual people and don't live a virtual life on that interweb.

Only here for shits and giggles
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 18:51, closed)
Considering you are au fait with every other meme I am surprised you ask. Obvious double bluff
bart flem!
(, Wed 23 Jul 2014, 18:30, closed)
Think i bagged a couple

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 18:52, closed)
you've found the edit button then

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 19:50, closed)
The one marked delete?

(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 20:05, closed)
no deletes no regrets fuckface
minor edits permitted just to make my Honda accord sound like a 2ltr
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 20:21, closed)
cant polish a turd but you can roll it about in glitter
(, Tue 22 Jul 2014, 20:19, closed)

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