>_<
I joined this great website, great daily QotW's then suddenly someone made a huge gaff.

They asked about other peoples gaffs on other social websites.

It bombed, then I posted.

Think that's my gaffe...
(Helo, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 15:26, Reply)

I used to enjoy reading responses...
written by the deviants and social reprobates on a certain bulletin board, but my gaffe was to assume that the moderators would listen to the repeated requests for a question that wasn't banal and based on a self-indulgent anecdote....

The questions on that board used to promote interesting responses, not numerous calls for it to be pulled down. When did it jump the shark?
(Chad, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 14:59, Reply)

please for the love of god
can we have another qotw
( rofl harris, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 14:49, 7 replies)

Well
My social networking gaffe is to remind everyone that they are playing the game......sorry
(mon bison powered by magnets, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 14:27, 14 replies)

Don't get me started...
Hot or Not is bad enough for time wasting, but has anyone else encountered those bloody things that spam your MSN inbox for contacts and then email all your contacts saying "XYZ wants to chat to you - please join" - I'm thinking of Where Are You Now (WAYN), etc. No-one I have ever spoken to about it ever actually joined - they always got a request from a "friend" who, when asked says "oh, I got a request from someone I knew and it then contacted everyone I know". What exactly is the point, other than creating a lovely verified-email list for Spam-mongers. Twunts the lot of 'em...
(Chad, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 13:44, Reply)

Slating
After reading everyone slating Facefuck...Spamspace etc, I wonder how many people thought it was fun to upload their photo to 'Hot or Not' and join the B3ta pool group?

Not a fan either but the flash games can relieve the boredom at work.
(never-right -getting it wrong since '78, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 13:33, Reply)

reading all this shit
inspired me to log in to spunkbook for the first time in a while. Saw this:

and decided to cunt the fuck out of there. Seriously - is that normal? I have like 70 "friends" on there, most of whom I met at a wedding once.
( I have run out of coke is a little sweaty, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 13:16, 2 replies)

Lies, all lies.
Due to a hilarious series of accidents, coincidences and misunderstandings, I became friends on Facebook with a young Taiwanese scientist. Her profile pic was stunning, her English impeccable, and we used to chat long into the night. She was involved in research into recycling and sustainable manufacturing and such - her team was trying to design and build an entirely organic pen. It would be environmentally friendly and completely biodegradable, and the patents would be worth a fortune.

I ruined it though, like I always do. I comitted a terrible faux pas that ended up costing her job. I'd expressed an interest in her work and she'd emailed me something she was working on at the time, showing how often the textured vegetable protein connecting the ink reservoir to the nib gave way, resulting in a leak that inevitably stained the writing surface. Stupidly I posted it on my blog where it was noticed by someone she worked with, and the rest is history. We don't talk any more.

All because of a soy-seal note-wrecking graph.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 11:39, 5 replies)

Social Networking Gaffe No.1...
Letting this QoTW drag it's limping carcass on any longer - surely it's time it was put out of its misery?
(Chad, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 11:39, 8 replies)

My boyfriend Ed...
...made the terrible mistake of accepting a Facebook friend request from the odd bloke at work. So far he has received a slippery nipple, a baby monkey and a dolphin. I think Ed is his extra special friend, and enjoy reminding him of this fact.
(claireyfairy There's a smell in here that will outlast religion, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 11:35, Reply)

a real-world one...
The conferences I go to have both talks and poster sesions. At poster session, you stick up a poster explaining your latest results and how exciting they are; then people wander past and maybe start a discussion with you about it. Or they start one with the guy next to you, and you stand there looking lonely.

Anyway, wind the clock back some years til when I was just a grad student.

So I was by my poster, which natuarally contained some really quite exciting results (which was why I didn't get a talk) and two big cheeses (let's call them JR and EG) walk by, then stop, look at my poster briefly and start talking to each other quietly.

So I wait. No questions for me? Why are they discussing my poster without me, when I'm right here? But I wait some more.

After a bit I gently interrupt them and suggest that they ask me about my poster, rather than each other.

"Well", says JR, "Actually we were talking about something else, but do tell us about your work anyway..."
(haberman is singing in the changes, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 11:09, 2 replies)

Holiday Gaffe
I was going to post a Madeline McCann joke but can't summon the effort

For Johab:
Recently went on a singles holiday but couldn't find the right girl. One night I'm out in the local villa and run into this cute little blonde thing! She was petite and cute! I just couldn't resist so I decided to take her out.

I was doing ok till one of her mum's mates saw me and told the Portuguese police...

Yrs

R Murat
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 10:55, 2 replies)

Advice to girls writing online dating profiles
A few years ago I did the online dating thing - it was good fun. Although I didn't end up in an LTR with anyone from the site (I found one elsewhere), I had some good times and even made some new friends who I'm still in touch with now, 3 years later, which is always worthwhile.

However, one thing I saw a lot in female profiles was comments like:
"I'm looking for an HONEST man"
"Players and head fuckers need not apply"
And so on.

I mean, seriously, people. If you're going to write that in your profile, why not just make sure you have VICTIM stencilled onto your forehead in your picture?
Don't do it. Really.
(davywavy, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 10:50, 3 replies)

B3ta's Social Networking Gaffe...
was this QOTW.

There's been nothing new posted in over 12 hours. Surely that's not normal?
(Half of Stephen Fry's right buttock pissed on your dog on, Thu 18 Sep 2008, 10:44, 3 replies)

10 poin ts ofr observation
umm am i the only person that hasnt noticed the difference between the 'new' and 'old' facebook?

i use it that rarely i really dont understand what the fuck is different about it!!
(Serbitar Has a furry shit canon called Whitey., Wed 17 Sep 2008, 21:22, 5 replies)

Work Facebook vs Personal Facebook
I work for one of those companies that pretends to be a person. We've got about 2500 friends and most of them are from our main customer base (the students of the town I live in).

Unfortunately, every so often whilst clicking through messages and adding friends etc. I forget exactly which account I'm logged in on.

This has proven to be the source of many an embarassed moment in our office.

Not least of all when you realise that the nice message you've just got from a really really hot young girl who apparently "had the best time ever last night, thank you, thank you, thank you, I can't wait til thursday!!! XXXX" isn't commenting on us (alcohol having killed all braincells) but rather just on the nightclub I work in.

Bubble = Burst, Reality = Back in.
( Ril3y is a brit abroad.. bring on the Stella / Asahi, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 18:42, Reply)

When Blackberrys go bad
First of all, I hate people with Blackberry phones too. Some us of have to have them. Bear with me.

On the day I was given a Blackberry, I scribed an email to my girlfriend. It was of the 'thanks for last night' kind.

I began to type her email address, and magically, the little bastard guessed her name for me. Correctly, like it had her email address saved from my sim card.

It was actually a girl in my company with exactly the same name. That was great.

Length. short but delightfully off topic.
(whitehorse, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 17:34, Reply)

I think I'm spending too much time on b3ta
I just moved house, and put my status on facebook as

'Vitamin C has just moved, gaz me for my new address'.

got a few messages asking what the fuck a gaz was. oops.
( ascorbate, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 17:10, 10 replies)

I'd just met my current girlfriend
we were both 21 and I and was thoroughly enjoying showing her off to friends and family - I even made a facebook account for her (expressly so that my own page could reflect my own 'in a relationship' status) and uploaded a super-sexy profile pic for her.

I showed her and she wasn't thrilled. After commandeering the account she added her favourite photo of herself (to her otherwise empty profile) as her new profile pic - and that is how I came to be in a relationship with an eight year-old.

I'm massive.
(jubilantjeremy yes please, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 17:09, 5 replies)

Oh yes, this one from a couple of weeks ago!
And yes, it's another one about FaceSpunk. And yes, it's another one about having added a parent to it.

First of all, DAMN YOU STATUS UPDATES!!! DAMN YOU TO HULL!!!

OK, a couple of weeks ago, me and the lass went out for some boozing for a good gaggle of mates. As you do, while drinking, you tend to need to go for a piss. So... of to the bogs I pop.

Literally seconds before I manage to close the door, the lass comes barging in to the bog with and locks the door. Now this is what your thinking now is exactly what all our mates thought at the same time.

What really happened at the time was the lass needed the bog too, but could wait for the other loo cubical to become available (both of the toilets in question are small rooms, rather than segregated mens and womens toilets). So we just did our doings and both returned to our friends to many peoples jaws lying on the ground.

Personally, I didn't twig at first, but it became apparent that everyone thought we'd been for a quickie in the loo's. After about half an hour, people shut up about, but still didn't believe us.

Fast forwarding to the following day, both me and the lass received many a message on FaceSpunk along the lines of "What were you two up to last night in the bog?".

Without thinking a head, I posted in the status update rather than replying to many individual messages.

The exact update was: "Shaun obviously can't go for a piss without people thinking he's shagging in the bogs! Honestly, people have such a low opinion of me!!! Bastards!"

This proved to be the beginning of many jokes and questions from my father (whom I forgot was also on FaceSpunk). Even two weeks on, I'm still getting the brunt of his jokes... mainly when I go to the toilet :-(

I think I may be developing a complex now...


Length? About 2 days since I last pissed...
(ShaunyBoi has been surviving fires since, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 16:24, 1 reply)

Right. I'm puzzled.
Mike woz ere has prompted this - it's not directed at him or anyone in particular. But...

*deep breath*

There's been a number of stories here about people posting photos of themselves from theme parks/ status updates reporting hangovers/ whatever else along those lines... on facebook while they were supposedly off sick.

And this makes me wonder: just how thick do you have to be to do that?
( Enzyme is powered by sunlight, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 16:10, 11 replies)

Sometimes they don't realize their gaffes.
Take this one for instance: richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/843636860.html

(Worksafe, but will make you chuckle.)

I mean, come on. After reading that, the LAST thing I want is for her to open her box!

The scary part is that she's not really one of the worst ones I've seen. I go cruising through there now and then for the same reason that people slow down and look over car wrecks.

Let's see...

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/843830660.html I spent several minutes trying to decipher this one before I gave up.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/842320842.html Nothing says class like hanging out in gym shorts on your front porch. Especially in a new subdivision where the land still looks wounded.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/842131092.html I'm pretty sure I don't have what it takes.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/841271476.html I thought that prostitution was illegal here...

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/839664480.html I think she needs to speak up a little.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/837305049.html Must like fleas and enjoy having your underwear devoured.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/838584977.html I bet she wears a flannel nightie buttoned to the chin and doesn't even wrinkle the sheets.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/830476767.html Yeah. Good luck with that. Every man wants a 19 year old single mom, especially if he's hott. Im sure u wan 2 gett 2 no her. I know I do, just so I can swat her upside the head and teach her to spell.

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/830229835.html Okay, see that big dust cloud moving away from you at high speed? That's every man in the city, running as hard as he can.

Honestly, people- do you even read what you're writing in these ads?!?

EDIT: I especially like this exchange:

richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/844852989.html Original post
richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/845002457.html Response (not by me).
richmond.craigslist.org/w4m/845480768.html Rebuttal! (Doesn't she sound charming?)

Oh SNAP!
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Wed 17 Sep 2008, 16:10, 16 replies)

Having several colleagues as friends...
and then posting photos of me at a theme park on my sick day.
( mike woz ere 7442200 & 7696970 getter, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 15:56, 2 replies)

Fucking Facebook Fucking Applications
Got back from the pub one night and went through Facebook (never do this kids, it's the same with texting. Never do it drunk) and someone had sent me an application called Like, Love, Marry or somesuch.

I started marking off people thinking that it was jolly good fun in my inebriated state and was happily liking, loving and marrying away into the wee small hours.

Next day I look at my newsfeed...

It's gone and fucking told everyone what I put... that was slightly fucking awkward! Fortunately a quick status change fixed it all (I blamed the demon drink)
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 15:42, 1 reply)

I must be the only web monkey who hates FaceBook...
I work in T'internet related fields, I use the net for a large proportion of my leisure time and I still loathe Facebook. And Myspace.

I think the problem is that Facebook especially promotes a level of narcissism that is rarely seen outside the realms of a Hollywood Diva. I mean, why should I give a toss what a friend-of-a-friend-of-a-friend-of-and-acquiantance-of-a-work-colleague is up to? I barely give a toss about what I'm doing, so what in god's name makes you think I care about your sad, trivial existence?!

And the applications. Oh god, the sodding applications. In one week, I've been sent Care Bears, Pirate names, a Pillow fight, fifteen quizzes, four crap games and the option to find out how kinky I am. Why? For the love of god, why? Don't poke me. If you aren't actually my wife and you poked me in the pub, it'd end badly for , so why do people think it's ok to annoy to shit out of me online?

I don't want a constant drip-feed of your activities - "barry is taking a shit", or "sandra is having a PMS day", etc - if I care enough to give a rats' ass about what you're up to, I'll call, or meet you, or email you and ask - that way we can have what we in the human race call a "conversation".

I'm tired of the inanity and I am glad that more and more workplaces are banning access to facebook. If they can only work on stopping ignorant mouth-breathers from playing music on their phones on public transport, I'd be a happy man!

/rant

p.s my Social Networking Gaffe is that whilst hating the pointless vacuity of Facebook, I firmly advocate the use of forums and social networks for groups of people with an actual interest to share (i.e fan sites, etc) - it's the lack of actual interesting content on Facebook that drives me insane...
(Chad, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 15:19, 13 replies)

The new Facebook...
...can go cunt itself in the fuck.

Apologies for extreme vexation (and brevity).
(Holloway_Girl To err is to be human, to be a fool is to believe, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 14:19, 15 replies)

Never own a Credit Card if your gonna be drunk!
This is a simple fact of life... if your gonna be drunk on a regular basis... never have a credit card to hand!

This takes place in 2003, shortly after starting my first proper job. Being my first proper job, I found myself having a large amount of funds every month, compared to only my £50 a month outgoing. And what would any other self-respecting young 19 year old lad do in this position? That's right! Go out and blow it on partying and boozing... which I did... in copious amounts :-)

This was all good at the time, and have many good memories from the time when money knew no limits.

Anyway, around about the same time, I had acquired a credit card for "emergency" purposes, and kept it on my person for "emergencies".

So, one particular night out, I was "having it large" as they say, and really putting back the drink. Lager, shorts, shots, the lot. Not helping to the matter was the fact it was a student night out, and drinks were about 80-90p a pint.

That night seemed to go on forever, and I eventually got home around 4:30am, and the next thing I know I'm waking up in bed, still fully clothed, with a very heavy hangover. After many hours of receovery, I make it over my PC (being only 2 foot away from my bed, you'd imagine this would be an easy take). First thing I checked was my emails, but two of them stood out for me, big-style!

First email was from FaceParty, telling me that my new account had been successfully been set up, and was ready for me to start filling in. This was no big deal, the account was empty except for a couple of details which had been misspelt (obviously the drink at work).

The second email was a bit more dubious. Turned out that in my drunken state when I had rolled in, I had gotten my credit card out and paid for the Adult Verification for FaceParty for some reason. Although, with a major upshot to this right gaffe of mine, I did now have full access to all the hotties "private" pictures on FaceParty. Some of these photos were fully nude photos, even some pictures of full on action, or even possing with "toys being placed" about their bodies.

Out of an absolute gaffe costing me £30 at the time, I had actually got myself a nice little bonus out of it for a year.


Length? About a years worth of nude hotties...
(ShaunyBoi has been surviving fires since, Wed 17 Sep 2008, 13:34, 1 reply)