welcome to...
When in a car passing from one county to another, I must begin whispering the name of the area currently being occupied (eg: Monmouthshire) repeatedly, gradually reaching a crescendo when passing the sign heralding the new county at which point I scream the name of the place I am now entering (eg Cardiff) at the top of my lungs and clapping my hands in glee. Started my brother on it too now.

I also have to put my fingers in my ears when flushing aeroplane toilets, and run out of my downstairs toilet at home. But only late at night. The flush has an air of menace.
(schnuff, Sun 31 Jul 2005, 10:22, Reply)

White Rabbits again
Aha. We had a similar first day of month tradition, where remembering it was the cue for a punch-fest. "Pinch-punch/First of the month/White Rabbits" would be the war cry, and if successfully executed would render the pinch-pincher immune from first day-related hurt until noon when the usual house rules about "no assaulting siblings" would be brought back into force.

The thing was, you had to get the whole saying in, otherwise an older, wiser sister (YOU KNOW WHO YOU ARE) would take the opportunity to inform me I didn't get it right and proceed to punch and pinch the living daylights out of me on the grounds of loopholes I didn't grasp as a seven-year-old.

The other year I emailed her one first of the month with that rhyme and nothing else. It made her cry.

Funnily enough that's what it did to me when I was seven.

So I... er... win. Yeah? *Shuffles uncomfortably*
( sp3ccylad carries on breathing all the way up to, say, Sun 31 Jul 2005, 9:25, Reply)

Good times
We had a great game on the school run when I was small. 1 point for every Banham security van spotted (there were loads), 5 points for some random little girl who used to walk with her dad to school, 5 points for being 10 minutes early, and -5 points if the Mothercare lorry was blocking one of the roads we used. Grr, that damn lorry, I still have an irrational hatred of Mothercare.
(donksta, Sun 31 Jul 2005, 0:59, Reply)

The buggies...
It appears many people are missing half of the punch buggy tradition: if you see a beetle, you say "Punch buggy [color of buggy]". The punchee can then reply with a rhyme to mitigate the puncher's ardor. A prime example:

-Punch buggy black!
-Punch you back!

Off course, to add some spice, it is set that the reply must come within 0.06 seconds of the buggy announcement or the puncher has full authority on the punch's effects and/or side-effects.

Here's another tradition that my entire family has entertained for as long as recorded history has been recorded: whenever one of us is visiting Loughborough, we go "Pardon me, but where's Loogabarooga?" It makes the locals feel good about themsleves seeing them yanks are sooo focking stewpid... My family is a kind bunch.


And my family's length is bigger than your family's length.
(st0pid, Sun 31 Jul 2005, 0:20, Reply)

My Climbing club has a few.
Including getting the new chairman to hang upside down and down a pint; before he is allowed to be chairman official. The the new and old treasurers have to try to remove each others socks. We have a climbing helmet of doom(tm) which is passed down to the perpetrator of the biggest epic of the year.

Games of secret charades are played on the first trip in October and human pyramids are built out of the freshers too.
(el_meerkat, Sun 31 Jul 2005, 0:07, Reply)

Another one
My mum used to wake up us kids on the first of the new month, and get us to say:
White Rabbits
White Rabbits
White Rabbits

Apparently if this is the first thing you say at the start of the month, you will have good luck the whole month?

Should I also mention that she is a devout Christian, and this kind of sounds a bit unGodloving? Hmmm.
( sheraloonytunes, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 23:55, Reply)

Dumbasses in cars
I picked up a strange tradition/habit from a friend a few years back. Whenever I see a really nice car or even a shit car that tries to be nice, I yell out "Sorry about your penis!". This statement is regardless of gender, and was spawned on the theory that guys with nice cars are compensating.
(chaoticmatter, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 23:30, Reply)

Not funny
Every Sunday lunch, ever since I was about seven or something, my dad always tries to hide a sprig of mint from the garden in my dinner. He tries to find ingenius ways of hiding it, like piling the meat on top of it so I 'don't know it's there.' He then spends the duration of the dinner looking at me and chuckling to himself, the chuckles getting louder and louder when I go near the hiding place, until finally bursting out into fits of laughter when I discover said treat. It's been over ten years and he's still doing it, and it's still not funny now. My dad's a bit mad.
(Funty, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 22:41, Reply)

Shit, i can't believe I almost forgot this!
Every time we pass the RAC building on the (m5? m6), well, passing Birmingham- we always salute it as we drive past. ALL MY LIFE WE HAVE. I don't know why, especially since we're on the AA now.

Coming back from holiday a week or so ago, my sister drove home with her boyfriend first. She rang as we were passing the RAC "boat" (hence why we salute), and I asked if she had saluted. SHE HAD NOT. the bitch. Don't worry though, 'cause she saluted from home and I saluted EVEN HARDER THAN EVER HAVE DONE BEFORE. It made me feel warm inside.

Aaaagh, i'm too drunk and i'm typing like a palsey or a 4 year old.

Well, that's my life. Enjoy it, you never know what's coming next.
( Naive Amoeba Bored Cig, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 22:31, Reply)

If we're out driving
and me or Mrs Nobody need the loo, it's tradition to sing to the tune of the William Tell Overture (Lone Ranger Theme):

Wanna wee wanna wee wanna wee wee wee,
Wanna wee wanna wee wanna wee wee wee,
Wanna wee wanna wee wanna wee wee wee,
Wanna weeeeeee!
wanna wee wee wee
( NobbyNobody 21 years a b3tan, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 21:53, Reply)

"Turn your camera off"
Around a year ago, me and a friend were attending the local picture-theatre, to see Shrek 2 I believe. Anyway, when the anti-piracy no-cameras-allowed warnings popped up, some "joker" behind us decided to show off his rapier wit. "Better turn your camera off!" he remarked, no doubt with a huge grin on his face and the hope that some comedy-scout from the BBC was in the audience.

We spent a good five minutes containing ourselves, and have made the same comment at every film we've attended since.
(slotbadger, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 21:41, Reply)

it really works

Whenever at a campfire and smoke blows in your face, repeat the mantra "i hate white rabbits" uh, repeatedly, and the smoke will leave you be.

Disclaimer : you do not actually have to hate white rabbits in order for this to work. you just have to say it to placate the smoke god. not sure if hating white rabbits helps, but i'm going to try my best to hate them and see if that improves the mantra.

i hate white rabbits.
(goorf, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 21:03, Reply)

Hampster Squared:
I keep losing the game
(Chom, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 20:52, Reply)

THX
Whenever THX does the sound promo thingy at the beginning of a movie, my Mum, brother and I MUST-MUST say,

"THE AUDIENCE IS NOW - DEAF!"

(Quoting a line from a movie called "Tiny Toons Summer Vacation)

My mum insists we say it, no matter where we are, or how embarrassing it will be. I even have to say it while I'm fast forwarding through the previews, although then it sounds like,

"THEAUDIENCEISNOWDEAF!"
(Arctix, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 20:25, Reply)

Wierd? You tell me.
When I was a wee kid (About 2 years ago) I started to sleepwalk. And really sleepwalk, as in 'down the street, into the local YWCA and sit down in the lobby' sleepwalk. To 'focus' myself, a helpful friend told me to always fall asleep with one hand over my left eye, so I could focus, apparently, on not sleepwalking.
I just remembered that's why I do that, now.

Wierd?
And now most of my friends've started too. I told them it's to make you more intelligent.

Obviously, they need it.
(ZooLurker is an angry chick with a mullet!, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 20:18, Reply)

fentruk
You win a disabled parking badge.

Aquire it from the next mongkart you stumble across.
(Daveh, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 20:06, Reply)

beginning of LION KING [pernickity correction not a tradition at all}
I DO BELIEVE the first word of the song is not 'pensylvania' as previously quoted, but is, in fact, the name of the Arsenal manager.. listen....you KNOW im right...
(wogansbitch, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 19:22, Reply)

Punching One...
When ever me and my mates see a yellow car we punch each other, except one lunch time this evolved into yellow anything, i tell you tho the bruises totally worth it!!! I love some traditions.


All the depth you could ever need
(Bhougal...hang me upside down from a banana tree and call me BERTTIE BHOUGAL>>>Oh Yeah...!!, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 18:13, Reply)

Kettles
I find I tend to stand on one foot while filling the kettle. Then when it's switched on, I feel compelled to salute it. This makes it boil faster.
( Ysol ab abl blap, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 17:54, Reply)

Also, one of the villages next to mine
does this

and if you tie your shoe laces in the wrong order, the witches steal your shoes. since i've lived with pagans i know its true - they steal them and hide them in the freezer.

My hamster has an odd tradition too, when we feed her she never goes straight to her food, first she goes to the opposite end of the cage and up the ramp, then to the back, then over the bridge back to her food. Recently she's also added waiting for me to give her a hand over the bridge. It makes me wonder if its a tradition or a belief system she's created for herself
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 17:41, Reply)

Saturdays when i was a kid
Breakfast: dad would make porridge, upon making this he would take a bowl into mum shouting "MOTHER!" which me and my brother would then copy, while running into the kitchen to get our own.

NOTE: one must be dressed before getting porridge and that INCLUDES SOCKS.

Lunch: Chips from the chippy for lunch, but for some reason we had to warm the plates in a bowl of hot water

Afternoon: Whether the TV was on during the day or not, it would be put on at the end of Grandstand. For unknown reasons me and my brother would feel the need to jump up and down to the music

Tea-time: Hotdogs for tea (well sausages wrapped in bread) while watching dukes of hazzard

Nowadays on the trip from Swansea to Derby it is imperitive that we scream as we're going through tunnels and point out the 'green tree' (a normal tree but lit up green.

Traditions such as these are very comforting
( Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 17:16, Reply)

severn bridge
Every time we cross the old severn bridge I point out the old nuclear power station that I went to on a school trip. Every time I mention it the the wife reply gets more irate. I even point it out when its foggy and you can't see it. If the wife's driving she purposefully takes a different route avoiding the bridge.
( nikdude, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 16:27, Reply)

.
I'm at a certain college in Oxford, and every time the clocks go back, all the students, and anyone else who can get past security, walk around one of the quads, backwards, for an hour (2a.m. til 2 a.m.), in an anti-clockwise direction, spinning at the corners, and drinking port straight from the bottle, while wearing sub-fusc (suit, white shirt, white bow-tie, gown and mortarboard) to conserve the time-space momentum to stop the world from ending, because it's a tradition, of about 30 years.

Also I'm one of the landy wavers, but you also get waved at, and should wave, if you're in a 7 type car, as long as it's not a caterham or westfield, and in Subaru Imprezas.
(Oily, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 16:13, Reply)

Daveh
Is it because its the name of the "special" person from southpark?

What did I win?
(G.Eusebio ...Fentruk from the long past..., Sat 30 Jul 2005, 15:46, Reply)

The EastEnders trumpet
I find it impossible to listen to the EastEnders theme tune without providing a trumpet flourish at strategic moments: but I don't play the trumpet so I use my mouth instead, like this.

If I don't do it, I fear the moths will get me. Fluttery, powdery tradition-upholding bastards.
( sp3ccylad carries on breathing all the way up to, say, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 15:26, Reply)

Sporky!
Did a ginger guy called aleks be involved with this? Cos apparently he did this looking for me (Dave,) I remember him getting well excited telling me about it once we'd found each other. In a skankin pit.

Also a few years ago at festivals the shout was 'Timmmaaaay' rather than bollocks. Prize for anyone who remembers why.
(Daveh, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 14:23, Reply)

Bah...
...I detest my new Assistant Commissioner at work.
He's a proper little nazi bastard who really believes he "is touch with the troops." The tradition I have started and spread is that you must scratch your nose with your middle finger when you see him. He doesn't realise that we are all flipping him the bird.

We even have our officer in charge doing it to him.
(emadex thinks the world will end on, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 14:15, Reply)

two ducks
i live on this stupid little island in the middle of nowhere with millions of stupid little traditions. Probably the most random one is, if ever the queen comes over, she has to be presented with two dead stuffed ducks on a plate.

Haven't got a clue where the tradition came from but its bloody funny seeing her face when they give the plate to her, and then she even has to carry it for a while looking bemused and a little scared at these two brown oddly happy looking ducks staring back at her.

They probably just end up as corgy food when she gets home anyway
(Calmallama Is keeping this short and sweet, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 13:17, Reply)

Peas
My mum's a stickler for tradition.

Every time a pea falls from the plate, she's the first to announce that someone's 'peed on the floor'.

We live in a rural area, and there are a few signs bearing the legend 'CAT'S EYES REMOVED' to which she invariably replies 'BASTARDS!'
(dungeoneer, Sat 30 Jul 2005, 11:59, Reply)

Another new tradition...
My ex-wife is an extreme worrier. Especially when it coes to travel- it takes almost nothing to freak her out.

Turns out that when I was taking the kids on the ten hour drive to New York she was convinced that something dreadful was going to happen and that we would all be killed. So my middle kid hears this and says, "You know, we need to start telling each other when we leave for a trip, 'Don't die!'"

So when she had them on a trip that involved air travel, I spoke to the kids just before they got on the plane, and told my oldest to tell his brother that I said "Don't die." He relayed this message, which prompted a torrent of obscenities from their mother as she was fighting down the panic prior to flying.

And thus a new tradition was born. And she still doesn't think it's funny in the slightest.
( The Resident Loon Not a demographic. Do not measure., Sat 30 Jul 2005, 11:29, Reply)