Boo hoo
My best mate has gone for 6 months. Thing is, he's pretty much my boyfriend, and, even weirder, the father of my child.

We went out last night, got sloshed, and he went early. I broke down into what can only be described as...HYSTERIA! An inconsolable mess, I was in floods of tears, telling any of my mates that would listen how my best mate, boyfriend, the father of my child and the love of my life were away for six months. [one girl got confused and thought I was a gamer...]I couldn't leave the bogs for half an hour with poor mate Steph trying to make me feel better.

Just give me the razor blades now... *full certified emo*... well I was last night. I'm alright now, save for the fact I'm STILL bastard hungover!

And I'm sure yas don't even care anyway :(
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:30, archived)

I present this evidence to the court .
Women are fucking emotional timebombs.

The prosecution rests.
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:32, archived)

tut
pregnant women are.
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:33, archived)

And you arent married?
*tuts*
( Mykeyboy A massive, salty filing cabinet, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:35, archived)

It looks like we're going to have to have another stoning.

( Lightguy hail satan, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:37, archived)

*buys beard*

( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:46, archived)

buys marries
( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:47, archived)

does he know he is the father of your child?

( flurokitty 3, 2, 1 lets jam! (+.[___]·:·), Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:38, archived)

Hang on, you got horrifically drunk and you're pregnant?

Good going on that.
( Fictional Emma, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:43, archived)

misogyny friday?
oh wait. it's misogyny day every day.
( Whythebigpaws?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:33, archived)

What the hell does mysogny mean?

( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:35, archived)

i spell like a retard.

( Whythebigpaws?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:37, archived)

Typical fucking woman.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:40, archived)

I rephrase my question
what does misogyny mean?
( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:40, archived)

it's someone
who examines japanese soup at an odd angle
( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:42, archived)

( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:44, archived)

The hatred of women.
“Every organized patriarchal religion works overtime to contribute its own brand of misogyny” (Robin Morgan).
( Whythebigpaws?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:43, archived)

Morgan Johnson

'night all, going home now
( Gizmo.mp3 does not exist, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:49, archived)

Someone that hates women

( Fenris temporary Lazarus, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:43, archived)

paws what are you wearing?
how will i recognise you in the pub?
And what time are you getting there?
( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:37, archived)

i shall be wearing brown knee length shorts,
a green top and will be carrying my wicker bicycle basket.
i will most likely be covered in paint too.
time depends on the electrician man helping me connect up the motor on my piece of art i'm making. i imagine about 8ish. what time are you thinking of getting there?
( Whythebigpaws?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:41, archived)

a motor in a piece of art??!
photos! details!
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:45, archived)

oh, i will bore you all with photos when it's finished.
i promise.
( Whythebigpaws?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:51, archived)

please do.
i'm intruiged.
( spangolin - the odds are good but the goods are odd, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 17:11, archived)

i shall be there just after 7 but can only stay for an hour or so.
i hope i don't miss you!

*hopes*
( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:45, archived)

oh ok.
well i shall make a special effort to nag the electrician man to hurry up a bit then.
( Whythebigpaws?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:47, archived)

Shut your face and darn my socks
bitch.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:41, archived)

hahahaha
YES!

Another correct assumption from our correspondent in Oxford.
( Jam Master Geordie Hero of B3ta., Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:35, archived)

Women are fucking emotional timebombs. cunts
( Hankster, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:41, archived)

The lesbians are
not sure about the straight'uns though
( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:44, archived)

Who the hell are you?

( Bob Todd whee, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:32, archived)

Where's he going?
I bet he'll still miss you like fuck and be dying to get back to see you again anyway
( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:33, archived)

Scotland somewhere
I;'m in Middlesbrough.


Other person: I'm sammi, i been using b3ta talk a while now
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

oh
so not that far then ;)
( flurokitty 3, 2, 1 lets jam! (+.[___]·:·), Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:40, archived)

How come he's going there?
That's not that far, a train will get you to within a decent distance of him, and you're pretty far north already, you could say get the train up and stay with him for the weekend once a month and he could do the same for you once a month so you'd see him two weekends a month, that way the 6 months would fly by
( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:42, archived)

Working there.
With dogs.

/has a fresh, worried look on the situation
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:55, archived)

fuck a hole in the head
see you rut your sister ragged
( Edd: The Unfunny Try-Hard Edgelord, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

No, not really

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:33, archived)

Well you're completely right at least once in that post.

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:33, archived)

To go drinking while pregnant?
More of this.
( Flapjack I spay a little mare for you, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:38, archived)

Right. Well. Now then.

( Fictional Emma, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:34, archived)

ahoy

(rnuk http://flickr.com/rnuk, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

Hello

( Fictional Emma, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:39, archived)

awww *hugs*
6 months will fly by and he will be back before you know it :)
( flurokitty 3, 2, 1 lets jam! (+.[___]·:·), Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:34, archived)

6 months
Ach it'll fly by. Besides, nowhere's that far you couldn't travel if you really wanted to.
( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:34, archived)

Don't fucking bet on it.
/not helping
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

In 6 months
you can get to most places and back. Unless he's been posted to a war zone.

Edit: Scotland to Middelsborough? That's hardly anything, pah.
( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:38, archived)

I thought she meant she wasn't going to see him AT ALL for six months?

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:44, archived)

She seems to think
Scotland is the end of the Earth.

Here be dragons.
( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:46, archived)

I wish MY other half lived as near as Scotland! Fucking hell...

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:49, archived)

I spent a year
with someone who lived in North Wales - now that was a challenge ;)
( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:50, archived)

On the basis that you might run into Sprinkles or SSG?
Jesus...
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:53, archived)

Yeah
I escaped that fate.

*shudder*
( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:57, archived)

Who's SSG?
And what are they like?
( Bobson I who milks the milkmen?, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:58, archived)

Sir Sand Goblin.
And, a wanker.
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 17:08, archived)

Eeeeeeeeeeemooooooooooooooooooo
:-)
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:51, archived)

When she finally gets back here,
I'll think of you as I'm sliding it in, and smile...
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:57, archived)

GAYER

( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:59, archived)

Yup.
As gay as they cum. :P
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 17:09, archived)

Incorrect placement of vowels there

( bloobloo, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:46, archived)

Indeed
In wrote Middelsex on something earlier today too.

Spakcy fingers ;)
( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:47, archived)

Tee hee,
you said sex!
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:51, archived)

it's not forever
buck up, you're only down because you've chosen to be; chose not to be
( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:35, archived)

Oh yes this

( Dekazer, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

*pats* Poor dear.
Does he know that you're interested in him beyond his abilities as a sperm bank and friend?
(s0WmVHAwZgpG, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:35, archived)

He asked me out last night
I said I'd see... I mean 6 months away isn't the perfect start to a relationship is it?
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:39, archived)

Is he on Shetland or in Barlinnie Prison?
Why can't you go and visit him? Scotland is less than two spits and a swallow away from middlesborough.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:43, archived)

What you need
Is a bit of cock.

*offers*
(bobda rocking round the clock since, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

here are
all the people that care
( Grrrmachine the indifference engine, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

Drunk girl becomes hysterical... Amazing.
*is amazed*
( TN, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:36, archived)

I've never gotten hysterical in my life
except last night. I used to silently cuss hysterical girls. Soddit
( Methylene Blue - electrohead, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:43, archived)

Can't imagine why he's going away for 6 months...

( Undulating Tentacles of Love getting fun down to acceptable levels, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:44, archived)

He's leaving her
because she doesn't wear matchng socks.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:47, archived)

and gets pissed while carrying his baby

( Clairebare Back once again with the Ill behaviour, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:50, archived)

That's a relief.
For a horrible moment I feared he might just be doing a runner because he'd accidentally got an emotionally unstable teenager pregnant.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:51, archived)

That too.
But the one black, one multicoloured sock thing is the most worrying.
( Lonewolf - O R'lyeh? Ya R'lyeh!, Fri 16 Jun 2006, 16:57, archived)