morning

(Runcorn shitty limits, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 6:29, archived)

Yes

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 6:45, archived)

morning

( broadsword now that's fresh, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 6:48, archived)

go fuck yourmilf

( MiseryCunt, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 7:24, archived)

morning morning

( Cheers Cheers, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 7:35, archived)

Joyeux quatorze juillet !
to our French boarders
( $$ ✅, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 7:35, archived)

don't you fucking threaten me

( MiseryCunt, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:03, archived)

Bollocks

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:05, archived)

Es ist Freitag!

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 7:51, archived)

es donnert in der ferne

( MiseryCunt, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:04, archived)

Ou est le poubelle?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:05, archived)

la

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:27, archived)

at the end of le cock de le homosexual

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:36, archived)

l'

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:46, archived)

Wee

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 9:30, archived)

Hi

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:05, archived)

HOT CANADA SHITPIPE ACTION

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:06, archived)

Not right now mate, just had some.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:44, archived)

The sunsets were yellow and yellow and yellow and on fire, and the wildfires would put the yellow everywhere

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 10:17, archived)

I said 'kiss me, you're yellow, these are truly the last days'.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Fri 14 Jul 2023, 11:15, archived)

ARSEHOLE

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:06, archived)

/calendar is that way -->
oh no wait, carry on.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 8:06, archived)

All salutations taste the same.

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 9:08, archived)

Morning

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 9:24, archived)

Sure is bellend

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 9:32, archived)

Cheers

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 12:55, archived)

evening

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:21, archived)

Evening.
For anyone who was wondering which hospital Huw Edwards got admitted to for emergency paedo treatment: b3ta.com/talk/8377137
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:25, archived)

I'm certain he's booked into the priory, pervs been liking tweets all week, much breakdown , still got a phone . No mh hospital I know allows that.

( mongychops, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:42, archived)

Well yeah, if I had loads of money and wanted to hide from the press whilst pretending to get urgent treatment for a severe mental illness that made me buy naked photos of teenagers a luxury private hospital bed would be the obvious place.

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:57, archived)

I'm glad you've thought it through, for your kids

( mongychops, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 22:03, archived)

Yeah I always think of the kids

(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 22:13, archived)

morning

(Runcorn shitty limits, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:40, archived)

Please watch this link.


youtu.be/4VXKhJfRQ7k
(Oooh_cuntroversial Where have I been?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 22:25, archived)

* PAEDO ALERT *

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 22:27, archived)

As a dog returneth to his vomit, so a fool returneth to his folly.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 0:33, archived)

No.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Fri 14 Jul 2023, 6:03, archived)

Pushing that prick down the board

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:02, archived)

bit rude

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:15, archived)

Not nearly rude enough

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:32, archived)

yeah 'prick' isn't even a proper swear word
where was horse slasher when we needed him?
( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:49, archived)

Out slashing horses would be my guess.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:58, archived)

what a mare!

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 20:11, archived)

Ouija+

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:23, archived)

Bless you

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:33, archived)

Oocha hoor.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:26, archived)

arseboon dilbaro

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:33, archived)

FYI, Dan Wotton will be under the media spot light soon, and cliff ' call me kitty' Richards will happen this year I think

( mongychops, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:41, archived)

get down to william hill and put a tenner on
add a few more, make it an accumulator
( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:53, archived)

Bookies won't take those odd bets , Sunday on here I outed Hugh, can't bet on it tho

( mongychops, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:06, archived)

yeah i know. bunch of wankers.

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:10, archived)

What's Wooton been up to then?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:58, archived)

Perversion, sexual exploitation, bullying, abuse of power, getting people removed from jobs, ndas, it'll all come out, his boyfriends are outing the repellent cunt

( mongychops, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:05, archived)

is he an MP or something?

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:14, archived)

a repellent cunt, can't you read?
also Wootton has made appearances as a show business presenter on the ITV Breakfast shows Lorraine and Daybreak. From 2015 to 2018, he was also a regular contributor and panelist on Big Brother's Bit on the Side.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:19, archived)

oh. thanks.

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:55, archived)

That Dan Wooton is a proper weird cunt

( $$ ✅, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:17, archived)

Reckon he posts on /links?

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:19, archived)

absolutely

( $$ ✅, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:21, archived)

Weird, I was just thinking about Cliff Richard today, and that thing about the "other untouchable" after Savile

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:20, archived)

You mean queef, not cliff

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 20:13, archived)

that thing about the "other un able" after Savile ing myself
(Agent Pr1ck llǝɯs ǝɥʇ sʇI ˙ǝɔɐld sᴉɥʇ ǝʇɐɥ l, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:16, archived)

Well I'm too old for Cliff, allegedly

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:22, archived)

Dan Wooton was mentioned on Popbitch
Cliff will get away with it he is too well connected
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 20:16, archived)

Read that as "Dot Cotton"
To be fair to me I'm ill at the moment and everything is a bit blurred. Also wouldn't be the least bit surprising to me if Dot Cotton turned out to be the next Rolf Saville.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:05, archived)

Saville Rolf
ooh very posh
( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:20, archived)

Getting hard to keep track of which celebs have been outed, is there a version of that dead or alive website but for paedos?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:07, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/
( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 21:50, archived)

Good evening

( $$ ✅, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 19:24, archived)

I AM DEAD NOW GUYS. I AM A FUCKING DEAD CUNT
RIP SPANISHFLY
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:09, archived)

thank fuck

(sticklebrlcks that's Mr Bricks to you 🍎, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:18, archived)

Alright dozer

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:53, archived)

Ok laterz

( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:21, archived)

Join hands again everybody
OOooOOOooh spirits of the nether regions... Is there anybody else there?
( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:32, archived)

Does this mean I won't get my anal beads back?

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:40, archived)

you can have them back but they'll be haunted to fuck
you could make a sequel to the Exorcist tho... the Sexorcyst
( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:50, archived)

Would watch
+ wank
(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:56, archived)

I am not your fucking little sister mate

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:52, archived)

I'm telling mum

(( * )( * ) ( . Y . ) (○¥○) ( ͜ₒ ㅅ ͜ ₒ), Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:56, archived)

not
( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:01, archived)

IS THAT PRICK SPANISHFLY DEAD YET?
I FUCKING HOPE SO, THE SPASTIC
(sticklebricks, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:01, archived)

Alright mate. I really love the fact that you post about me.
To know I (as the cool kids say) “live rent free in your head”
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:14, archived)

Oh and ya nans got a skin fade.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:14, archived)

North Face Chat.

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:20, archived)

Mate I will slap ya nan and jizz on ya dog. Pipe down.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:23, archived)

rth

Simon Weston put his vest on
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:33, archived)

haha, Stump were great weren't they?
I love pitiful attempts at surreal comedy music, it's always brilliant!
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:35, archived)

plus the singer looked like Gareth 'Gaz Top' Jones, which is seldom advisable
unless, of course, you have the good fortune to be Gareth 'Gaz Top' Jones, in which case it's pretty much mandatory
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:37, archived)

calm down dozer ffs
/ac
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:33, archived)

I think he may need some kind of help

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:36, archived)

the kind of help you can only get in Switzerland

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:40, archived)

I was thinking a cia black site
But your idea works too.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:42, archived)

brb etc

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:43, archived)

I remember brb vaguely. Was he a racist Cunt?

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:46, archived)

i think he's the only black member of the kkk

( MiseryCunt, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:24, archived)

Bit racist

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:44, archived)

A real “American black site” is just a prison over there isn’t it?

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:47, archived)

Haha
I'll donate for the air fare
Or housebrick
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:43, archived)

Fuck of

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:38, archived)

Best Star Trek character ever

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:47, archived)

Nuclear wessles

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:49, archived)

I don’t think he was in Star Trek m8

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:52, archived)

new queue lear

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:15, archived)

Jean Luc Picard
Is this how it works?
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:40, archived)

FUCK

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:50, archived)

YOU

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:50, archived)

It's not like he has an excuse like Isaac Arthur with his speech impediment,
he just says it as wrong as it's possible to be. Nuculear, ffs. What a cunt.
( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:54, archived)

then Anton Yelchin felt he had to continue with the stupid accent, and he's dead now.
HAPPY, KOENIG?
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:10, archived)

Whooosh

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:42, archived)

just found this classic in the crates
lyrics are fantastic, lovely beat too
#www.youtube.com/watch?v=S42JwsplT_A&ab_channel=dbhoy07
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:58, archived)

Afternoons
What telly 'celeb' do you want to be touted officially as a creep?
I'd go for Rachel Riley
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:42, archived)

I googled her and she sounds interesting
The sort of person you could actually spend time with
( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:45, archived)

Good to know 👀
twitter.com/RachelRileyRR/status/1675832616774254593?ref_src=twsrc%5Egoogle%7Ctwcamp%5Eserp%7Ctwgr%5Etweet
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:11, archived)

I'd go for Rachel Riley too.
What was the question again?
( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:47, archived)

Who would you send to a certain death other than Boris Johnson

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:48, archived)

I should have paid more attention

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:49, archived)

Too late :(

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:12, archived)

That billionaire who's injecting himself with his son's blood to live forever.
Everyone else already has a certain death.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:50, archived)

I read an NHS transfusion booklet last week
It said that blood from relatives is definitely not advised
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:57, archived)

Yeah well most people can't afford it see

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:13, archived)

Fucking stupid fucking cunts

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:42, archived)

speaking of which, I just found a note from spanishfly's doctor in the CD vault.
At least now we know what he was pestering him for, "it's for my polyps", aye right
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:54, archived)

lol

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:58, archived)

11 blowies in an afternoon saving up the money for one of those bad boys, ooh my po lyps

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:35, archived)

Fuck Tha Po Lyps

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:36, archived)

What's spanishfly's favourite style of Caribbean music?

Polypso
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:43, archived)

As a committed Bokononist this offends me
"Verse 1: All of the true things that I am about to tell you are shameless lies.".
.
"She fired me. I shall never forget her. She believed that God liked people in sailboats much better than He liked people in motorboats."
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:50, archived)

OK then, what's spanishfly's favourite part of the red teletubby's body?

Po lips

Yes I know they don't have lips, and I realise it's almost identical to your punchline up there
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 15:46, archived)

Yes but... what is 10% cocaine in solution legitimately used for?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 15:48, archived)

"It is used as a surface anaesthetic but, because of systemic adverse effects and its abuse potential, its use is now almost entirely restricted to surgery of the ear, nose, and throat." - Martindale

Most of that batch we made last year went out of date, we only sold about 30 of them. I suspect we won't be making it again, there are plenty of licensed alternatives available that don't have the same problems with potential for abuse.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 15:59, archived)

Yeah, that last point is why I asked, there are so many alternatives. I was wondering if there were some unique qualities to coke that overrode concerns about its abuse.
I'm guessing it's really just a relic?
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:08, archived)

In a nutshell, yes.
The unit I work in makes unlicensed medicines, which includes things that no big pharmaceutical manufacturer can be bothered to make anymore because it wouldn't be profitable for them. These days, it's difficult to imagine a scenario in which cocaine would be more clinically appropriate than any of the alternatives.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:14, archived)

Sorry, I meant to say Mate I will slap ya nan and jizz on ya dog. Pipe down.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:26, archived)

You stupid fucking cunt

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:31, archived)

Christ, I'm reading all that shit you type

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:55, archived)

It's always a bit unsettling when an actual conversation breaks out on here, innit

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 18:08, archived)

Jamie Oliver.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:04, archived)

What about you Huw, with your made up name and your shameful mental illness and your bitch snitch wife

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:15, archived)

It’s short for Huel

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:17, archived)

ok then fuw is short for fuel, I GUESS

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:19, archived)

Gimme fuw gimme fi gimme that which idesi

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:28, archived)

Best of all the pickpockets

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:25, archived)

Most celebrity chefs tbh
James Martin first
Ainsley and his crew came to our pub when they were filming nearby for lunch
Very nice bloke did all the selfie stuff and skinned up in the car park
Dunno what he's like as a chef though
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:18, archived)

Yevgeny Prigozhin?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:21, archived)

Don't diss my mate
He makes a mean Sunday roast
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:30, archived)

Roast what, exactly

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:36, archived)

Mister Tumble
I hate that cunt
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:14, archived)

George Clarke
fucking cunt. Absolute shower of of shit. I'd like to brick the fucker up behind the wall in my home, happy to sacrifice the space and put up with the stink just for the pleasure of the desperate screaming and tapping of the bastard as he dies.

Architects. Pieces of shit the lot of them.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:26, archived)

But without them we'd have nowhere to live, like cave persons

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:28, archived)

INTENTS

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:30, archived)

That's a sacrifice I'd be happy to make

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:02, archived)

He has a really silly voice

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:13, archived)

no i do not

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:25, archived)

That idea is appealing to me more and more

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:07, archived)

I tried to keep it inclusive

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:24, archived)

Yeah I could live here
www.italyheaven.co.uk/basilicata/matera.html
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 15:47, archived)

Oooo, so could I

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:22, archived)

it's on my 'absolutely must visit' list

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:27, archived)

I visited a place like that in Southern Spain years ago, cannot remember where exactly, the atmosphere got much heavier after dark, we fucked of

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 17:07, archived)

Chris Evans dating a 17 year old, remember?

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:23, archived)

Of course they were out for revenge once Hydra gave them a super powerful metal arm

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:30, archived)

Leslie Grantham, murderer, sex pest, still working in TV up to his death

( mongychops, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:30, archived)

It's fine as long as he didn't take any indecent photos of her

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 15:30, archived)

John 'national treasure' Peel married a 15 year old in 1965

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:18, archived)

12:35, stick your cock in a beehive!

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:35, archived)

12.42 nooooooh you!

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:43, archived)

That was 12.43 you fucking stupid fucking cunt

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:43, archived)

When President Putin's watch is slow, we change all the clocks

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:17, archived)

12:46 shit stains in yer knicks

( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:46, archived)

12:47, sewage in Devon

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:47, archived)

12:48 shut up m8

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:48, archived)

12:49, I fucking decline

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:49, archived)

12:51, do it in my bum

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:51, archived)

Bun is admissible here, bum is clearly not

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 13:27, archived)

Your nan’s bum is admissible

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:39, archived)

If you can pay the entry fee

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 15:17, archived)

morning

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 6:43, archived)

morning

smeggy smeggy smeg, I mean
( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 6:47, archived)

Hullo
Guntshit, I mean
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:44, archived)

hi

( $$ ✅, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 6:55, archived)

Dollarz

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:44, archived)

morning

( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:03, archived)

Yes I

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:44, archived)

Queef Richard's

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:11, archived)

Wood-o

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:44, archived)

all over your *boink*

( broadsword now that's fresh, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 8:16, archived)

Stop hogging that boinker!
/board in-jokes from 12 years ago are never pp'd
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 8:41, archived)

You fucking stupid fucking cunt

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:59, archived)

Shit in my bollocks, I believe

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 7:50, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Thu 13 Jul 2023, 8:18, archived)

Not huw

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 8:48, archived)

Morning

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:02, archived)

Alrite
Picking the missus up soon the ripper will be in hospital another week or so
Then paternity leave a few weeks of fishing...
No sorry looking after wife and little one
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:06, archived)

-h +t

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:10, archived)

I saw what you did there

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:20, archived)

Lol should read nipper
Def not Peter or Jack
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:19, archived)

Hi Barbie

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:13, archived)

You fucking stupid fucking Kent

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:45, archived)

Barbie sequel
Barbie pegs Ken
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 9:54, archived)

vg

( Woodkovsky ☹️➝🚻➝🚽➝😣➝💩➝🧻➝😁, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 10:31, archived)

Stop the lorries

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 10:58, archived)

They keep coming over in boats

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:11, archived)

They're hauliers

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:28, archived)

France really should do more to stop them leaving

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:43, archived)

Why don't we just send all the lorries to Rwanda?

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:51, archived)

Too big for either the seats or the overhead lockers

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:58, archived)

Stop the floats

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:32, archived)

My doctor says it's too much fibre

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 11:44, archived)

Stop the oats

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:24, archived)

Alright Daryl Hall

( Cheers Cheers, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 12:30, archived)

Daryl Hall Jona Lewie's dieting horse
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 16:31, archived)

Right. I'm going to bed.
Then having a shower, then going to bed again.

Goodnight. I'd like an alarm call please, and some toast.
( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:49, archived)

You fucking stupid fucking cunt

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:58, archived)

arseboon dilbaro!

(arseboon dilbaro arseboon dilbaro, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:58, archived)

You fucking stupid fucking cunt

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:58, archived)

idgi

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 23:11, archived)

evening

(Runcorn shitty limits, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:12, archived)

Evening
My cat has just hooked my top lip with a claw. it was accidental, but it still fucking hurt.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:19, archived)

For fairness I've just started up a Mumhammer

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:21, archived)

Some photos might encourage new sign-ups, does anyone know where I can find pictures of women being encouraged to have a good time with small plastic figures?

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:24, archived)

Love Island

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:33, archived)

Lourdes

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:03, archived)

The "size doesn't matter" aisle in Ann Summers

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:10, archived)

We all know they only say that so as not to hurt the feelings of men with small pæñïï.

( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:48, archived)

Not a single emvee mention, your mother and I are VERY disappointed

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 1:18, archived)

MILH

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:07, archived)

#ianrush

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:24, archived)

inspired

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:32, archived)

Choke on a chaffinch’s chode

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:34, archived)

Hi

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:14, archived)

Huws at Ten

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:25, archived)

HUW EDWARDS!?!.!.!

(Smug Bastard LOL, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:47, archived)

Yes m8, we know.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:49, archived)

I met him once
he never asked me for pics 😪
(Smug Bastard LOL, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:51, archived)

I sent him pics of my bumhole but he asked for a refund

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:04, archived)

That fucker
I'm glad he's dead
(Smug Bastard LOL, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:14, archived)

I was ambivalent about him until I saw him on a Mary Berry programme, in which he came across as fucking wanker

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:52, archived)

also, I'm vickying my flind as I type this

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:53, archived)

You think you know someone

(Smug Bastard LOL, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:14, archived)

I couldn't care fewer, but the BBC have had this GRIPPING MYSTERY top of their front page for about a week now.
At least it's not What Meghan Has Said Now.
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:56, archived)

Whatever keeps Johnson’s WhatsApps off the front page

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:01, archived)

and yes that’s a euphemism

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:02, archived)

Predictions for what the next distraction will be?

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:07, archived)

Gordon the Gopher’s meth habit

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:10, archived)

I know the joke is always about Schofield fisting him
but I think all the puppets were operated by another person sitting under the desk. Maybe doing year 10 work experience.
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:16, archived)

I’m sure Scofield’s well versed in doing year 10 work experience

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:17, archived)

"Andi Peters: 'Some of my best years were spent with Edd the Duck'". www.telegraph.co.uk. Retrieved 2023-06-28

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:23, archived)

The first two Parkins look like "Ninj" has been at them
web.archive.org/web/20120204122437/http://www.the-broom-cupboard.co.uk/page4.html
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:32, archived)

lol

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:51, archived)

hahah good to see Andy Cranerolling everyone

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 20:47, archived)

<s> work experience
's
(Smug Bastard LOL, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:18, archived)

Whuw?

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:02, archived)

Yeigh

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:07, archived)

Top shagger
stuck him in a loony bin, disgusting
( $$ ✅, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:28, archived)

Didn't mongy call it several days ago?
He's like b3tas very own clairvoyant
( broadsword now that's fresh, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:40, archived)

Clair Voyant
Is that the girl he bought the pics from?
(Smug Bastard LOL, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 19:42, archived)

Well he's a grumpy old mental anyway
boring. I was hoping for Alan Carr.
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 20:15, archived)

Y/N/O?

( brb Monkhouse Stampede, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 20:30, archived)

Buonasera, dickstain's
How's it going
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:52, archived)

Our trainee GP Dr Virk has finally left today which is a relief.
Hopefully I can now stop thinking about that They Might Be Giants song that's been stuck in my head for the past 6 months.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:54, archived)

it is of considerable relief to me that I only know one of their records, because dear god it's shit
they're like if 'The Big Bang Theory' was a band
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:16, archived)

They do the theme tune, not even lyin.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:49, archived)

Oh ffs

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 20:20, archived)

You're a cunt

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 22:39, archived)

Virk somewhere else

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:28, archived)

Huw Edwards

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:01, archived)

that's libellous. You might want to reconsider that post.
You can't go round calling b3ta users paedophiles
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:10, archived)

Not any more it ain't

( Invisible Wizard - 12th Level Errorer, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:46, archived)

Huw, Huw, Barney McGruw

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:13, archived)

no real names plz

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:18, archived)

Huw's not a real name, duh

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:28, archived)

fucking is
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huw_Lloyd-Langton
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:49, archived)

Richard Hugh "Huw" Lloyd-Langton
You see the quotation marks in the middle there? That's code for, "This is a silly made up name I would ask my friends to call me, if I had any"
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:11, archived)

Our 3-woman team at work is down to 2
One quit and they've said they're not replacing her. This is fucking everything up for us.
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:10, archived)

shiv the bitch

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:34, archived)

shank the skank

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:51, archived)

Not bad, might bugger a beagle later

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:15, archived)

good thinking m8
I interfered with an ibis earlier

it was gr8
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:17, archived)

I figure I'd find it fun to firmly fuck a Fennec fox

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:32, archived)

I am going to whisk a weasel. When I get chance.
Anyone got Huw Edwards number? I have some photos for him.
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:21, archived)

yeah me, I have
I got it off Paul Gambaccini yesterday
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:51, archived)

I saw that post. Well done you. Gold star.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 21:04, archived)

alright

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:33, archived)

New chat bot! claude.ai!
You're right, I made a mistake earlier and contradicted myself, which understandably comes across as inconsistent and untrustworthy. As an AI, I do not actually have a personal analysis to offer or any ability to lie. However, I understand how my previous comments about Withnail and I falsely implied subjective viewpoints and interpretation. I should not have stated those things, and I apologize.
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:23, archived)

Dadhammer Support Network.
No Partner Shaming Posts
While many of us have partners and sometimes we can all get a little frustrated within our relationships, this isn’t a place to degrade them or make light of them. This does not stop you from making posts asking about what to do in situations which you need advice but at all times please be respectful to them.
No Sexually Explicit Mon Dad Content
This includes sexual focussed memes and models. This does not stop Dad focussed questions about relationships, sexuality, gender etc.
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:33, archived)

Dad, why you such a flake

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:34, archived)

Hey guys, first time poster here. Just realised I painted my most recent Daemonette Of Slaanesh to look exactly like THAT FUCKING BITCH, do you think I should get some help?

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:39, archived)

This isn't really the forum to talk about THAT FUCKING SLUT

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:55, archived)

Dadhammer sounds like a gay porn site

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:08, archived)

I'm wielding my dadhammer right now iykwim

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:53, archived)

And my dadaxe

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:53, archived)

Fucking cunt Wanker doctor spunk face didn’t sign my fucking prescription did he the fucking cunt

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:53, archived)

Can't imagine why

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:58, archived)

Cos he’s a fucking prick doctor that’s why.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:07, archived)

You remind me of the raging ned in Glenrothes about 20 years ago who was screaming at me because his doctor hadn't prescribed him as many Fortisip as he wanted to sell to the other junkies.

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:14, archived)

Fuck off you fucking prick

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:21, archived)

Yep, it's uncanny

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:22, archived)

lol

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:01, archived)

I'll sign pretty much anything for an easy life, don't have time in clinic to worry about what I'm prescribing these days.
Only the most gigantic bellend asking for ludicrously inappropriate medication would get turned down.
( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:41, archived)

Was it for your Tourette syndrome medication?

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:37, archived)

Nah. Nasal polyps.

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:01, archived)

A+ sa
( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:22, archived)

ENT only deals with those if you are dozer.
As he has his head stuck well and firmly up his fucking arse
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:31, archived)

Oh. If the consultant had previously suggested steroid drops / tablets then I'd usually be happy to reissue for a few weeks

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:37, archived)

YOU FUCKING JAKEY SPASTIC

(sticklebricks, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:05, archived)

Might get a job in the Cayman Islands.
If only to get a doctorsexpress.ky e-mail address.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:20, archived)

C G
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:31, archived)

rim+

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 17:44, archived)

wanker

( 2 Can Chunder Word to your mums, I came to prod bums, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:33, archived)

prick

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:58, archived)

AFTERNOON OFFICE TYPES

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:22, archived)

fuck off then

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:30, archived)

Ain't no officers here

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:41, archived)

i bet there is

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:04, archived)

They have to admit it if you ask them directly

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:26, archived)

Are you a chatbot

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:28, archived)

ai can't answer that

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:35, archived)

when will you be famous?

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 20:06, archived)

lol
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:40, archived)

B&

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:42, archived)

Filing that under Posts I have absolutely no memory of

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:43, archived)

There's an even more apt grrrmachine post from 6 May 2016 if you search for HE's name.
Can't link it because search is broken, and I'm not digging through the archive for it.
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:45, archived)

strikey Two Hats 2013

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:47, archived)

cowfoot 2009

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:49, archived)

b3ta.com/links/929969
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:49, archived)

so many names
so little time (probably)
( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:59, archived)

www2.b3ta.com/host/creative/99401/1689166940/noit160307.jpg
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:02, archived)

we've all been there

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:05, archived)

He must have been emailing his bum crack pics in 2007,
impressive dedication
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:30, archived)

and there we were thinking roy castle was dead

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:39, archived)

b3ta.com/search/talk?q=website+arse+trumpet
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:17, archived)

Sort by: oldest
b3ta.com/board/588336
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:20, archived)

b3ta.com/board/5435966
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:20, archived)

b3ta.com/board/6503316
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:21, archived)

ha. i actually remember that last one

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:49, archived)

I clicked that, and it thanked me

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 15:38, archived)

I am at St Helens hospital.
It’s a really nice place to die I think. Lots of colour
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:50, archived)

I refuse to believe that anywhere in St. Helens is nice

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:52, archived)

The hospital is really fucking nice to be fair.
The rest of the town needs fucking carpet bombing.

I have a few exes here…
(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:54, archived)

i hope the carpet bombs miss everything else
and thoroughly shagpile that hospital with you in it.
( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:58, archived)

One of mine moved there
Last I heard, he lost his job and got heavily into crack
( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:59, archived)

Was his name spanishfly?

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:06, archived)

it wasn't his mother's first choice but his dad insisted

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:22, archived)

No, Tony

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:47, archived)

= Nony

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:14, archived)

oh. have you puked everywhere?

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:56, archived)

nope just a routine ENT spooky

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:06, archived)

Today just gets better and better!

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:57, archived)

Just routine pal. To assess the rest of the damage done to my sinuses over the many years of MASSIVE DRUGS

(Fucksocks Put ‘em on, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:07, archived)

Damn.

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:09, archived)

Cocaine-induced heart attack after being roped into the egg 'n' spoon race?

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:12, archived)

o a
into during
( Mr. Tea 'ulmmm'/'mmneurgh', Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:01, archived)

Are you one of those people who check in to a Hospital on Facebook for attention?

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:23, archived)

u ok hun, I mean

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:25, archived)

This new reaction option is known as a care emoji and it is a way of expressing, in these tough times, that you care for something. A hug in an emoji, in effect, as it is a face holding a heart.
It is depicted in a cartoon style, since a realistic human face with arms grafted over the earholes and embracing a bloody internal organ might be disturbing for some users.
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:33, archived)

I can't remember the context but this was important back in December.
www2.b3ta.com/host/creative/100121/1672357835/chickenshug.jpg
( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:37, archived)

What have we learned?

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:01, archived)

Sage and onion is the better choice, if you value your oven.

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:03, archived)

Bang bang chicken?

( Smash Monkey 2 Anyone know a good therapist in South Africa?, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:15, archived)

+the mighty

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:29, archived)

‘As a result of my fashion side hustle, our journey to becoming parents is going to happen sooner than we thought …’
Fancy a quick journey?
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 11:58, archived)

Milan Kundera RIP

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:03, archived)

Milan GONEdera

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:06, archived)

I hope he fell into a volcano, so we can say Milan CALdera, more like!

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:21, archived)

oh man, I loved That 70s Show

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:10, archived)

I used to like when they sat around the table smoking, the ugly one and the unfunny one and the rapist.

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 12:59, archived)

b3ta b4shes, you mean

(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 13:05, archived)

back in the day you'd have needed pluralisation on all of those
now you could probably delete at least one of them
( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 14:07, archived)

Unfortunate side-effect of hiding /calendar, the Flickr Pool is also hidden by proxy.
Shame, now it takes more than one click to see HappyToast giving a cheque for £2,300 to a Covid-denialist anti-vaxxer Brexiteer conspiracy theorist with a "PhD" in homeopathy
(The Porcupine From Purgatory we of all lost both have them, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 16:09, archived)

What you can't really appreciate there is that their little legs end just below the frame

( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 18:14, archived)

On the plus side, he had a few cats.

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Thu 13 Jul 2023, 14:01, archived)

morning

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 7:05, archived)

alrite lizard lips

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 7:11, archived)

Hi

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 8:04, archived)

morninh

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 7:24, archived)

Cheers

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 8:04, archived)

Shove it up your ringpiece

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 7:29, archived)

and mine

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 7:57, archived)

And my axe

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 8:25, archived)

Already on it

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 8:04, archived)

Not again

( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 8:07, archived)

Yeah

(Smegg Wallace The O.G. Q.R., Wed 12 Jul 2023, 8:10, archived)

Good morning
The sun has got his hat on!
Or its hat on if we are being woke non genderist liberal wishy washy Guardian reader
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 9:48, archived)

their hat on

( Cheers Cheers, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 9:59, archived)

And my axe

( mr horrible up yours, dickface, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:14, archived)

Is it a nice axe?
Or a horrible one?
(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:15, archived)

Apologies grammar Nazi

(President of the lighthouse Organised the Trumpton riots, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:14, archived)

Herman Himmler
or should that be Theirperson Themmler?
( garold you're on mute I SAID YOU'RE ON MUTE, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 10:29, archived)

fuck work i'm having a day off.
morning.
( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 5:24, archived)

Right. I'm going to bed.
Then having a shower, then going to bed again.

Goodnight. I'd like an alarm call please, and some toast.
( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 2:40, archived)

evening

(Runcorn shitty limits, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 21:53, archived)

Tip-top!

( Turtle Power & Knuckles, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:01, archived)

shove a guava up your pee-hole

( Cheers Cheers, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:04, archived)

onlyguams

( MiseryCunt, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:07, archived)

Just digging in the acid crates
youtu.be/VfMvZjFe8Yk
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:32, archived)

Hold tight
youtu.be/Z4ZqGN-RBao
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:43, archived)

Get in
youtu.be/VggabFGw4zQ
( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:49, archived)

+to bed you senile old cabbage

( Queef Smegwin U r a 🔔🔚, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 22:50, archived)

Err some of us are tripping here, it ain't bedtime

( mongychops, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 23:22, archived)

This is scarier than back in the day, cunt , I was just 'I'm the child' then. Now it's sinister
youtu.be/bOxAykvWNJ8
( mongychops, Tue 11 Jul 2023, 23:58, archived)

youtu.be/Bu7Hyk14s0g
( mofaha ┐( ˘_˘)┌ ʅ(́◡◝)ʃ, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 2:02, archived)

i like it

( MiseryCunt, Wed 12 Jul 2023, 5:26, archived)