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MOR-NINNNNGGGG

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 7:15, archived)
Just saw my old Muslim pal on the bus, haven't seen him in over 10 years
Just apologised for being a white man with a shaved head, shouting at him on public transport.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 7:50, archived)
^ rejected Harry Enfield character

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:12, archived)
I'M CONSIDERABLY MORE RACIST THAN YOW!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:13, archived)
...David Yow from The Jesus Lizard, obvs

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:14, archived)
Idly wondered what he looks like these days,
and the answer is: Thom Yorke's dad.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:15, archived)
Silverfish interview on The Quietus right now.
Of interest to fans of early 90s noise rock.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:16, archived)
I'm going to see Therapy? on the Troublegum 30th anniversary tour in Edinburgh,
wonder if they'll manage to wheel out Lesley Rankine for Lunacy Booth
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:20, archived)
She's gone full mental on FB about Gaza and Rachel Riley

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:22, archived)
imagine someone going full mental online, eh

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 11:48, archived)
-ental +ongdaddy

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:40, archived)
Silverfish and Ruby both deserved to have been more successful than they were at the time.
Salt Peter is a classic album.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:23, archived)
I had one of their singles
and liked it.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:18, archived)
They were pretty good.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:19, archived)
Just don't mention wanting a brown baby, you'll trigger half the board.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:14, archived)
You mean a poo, right?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:17, archived)
Triggered by a brown baby but not a raped baby
The board is fucking sick then. Just like you. Scum.

Boo hoo. Mummy I'm being bullied. Boo hoo. Put on ignore because I can't handle it.

You can dish it out but you can't take it can you? Limp
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 9:55, archived)
Let it go, bou. Let it go and your mental issues will partially dissipate.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 9:56, archived)
I'm not fucking bou
Wait. That came out wrong.
Oh wait. That also came out wrong.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 9:58, archived)
You're not fucking anyone, are you?

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 9:59, archived)
Low hanging fruit

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:06, archived)
Accurate fruit.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:08, archived)
He's not flouncing
Probably at his till
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:25, archived)
You are really, really, cripplingly shit at this.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:26, archived)
Cool
You ass creeper
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:46, archived)
LOL ass

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:47, archived)
Sycophant

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:49, archived)
I'm glad you're enjoying your time on /talk

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:50, archived)
Fuck off

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 11:03, archived)
You're having this conversation with yourself.
Probably best all round (not least for your own sake) if it continues like that.
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 11:07, archived)
Shut up and make my lunch, love
You bent, crippled nignog
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 11:42, archived)
The half I can't see apparently, mainly brb alts I think, similar situation to board where I don't see half the posts or replies due to LS18 ignoring me

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:37, archived)
just incognito/private it if you really want to see, it'll probably get deleted in a minute anyway

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:40, archived)
Ok so I just gave that a try, it turns out I'd missed one comment that made me properly laugh:
ocsp, "It says there's a typo. Is there supposed to be a dot between dull and spastic?" which I think sums up the forum pretty well.
The rest is just brb I think?
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:47, archived)
pretty sure it's bou, that's not to say it can't be either/both though.

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:54, archived)
I think they may be the same person, not sure obviously, it amuses me to think so though

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:56, archived)
Ffs, I fucked my dates up. I'm not on holiday till 27th. Got next week off anyway. What a div

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:04, archived)
Whoops

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:42, archived)
hahaha i love a smoke me

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 13:30, archived)
Morning

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:33, archived)
Hi

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 8:42, archived)
It's all birthdays here
My best friend's birthday tomorrow, the baby's first birthday Monday, my other mate's birthday on the 28th and my dad's on the 30th
(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 9:04, archived)
Sounds expensive

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 9:55, archived)
You're not kidding

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:05, archived)
Halllllooooooooowwwwww

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 10:14, archived)
Ere e is!

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 11:43, archived)
I’ve got a new musical instrument arriving today
What have you done to annoy your partner/carer/probation officer recently?
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:06, archived)
Made up some obvious bullshit about 'the mongdaddy'.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:10, archived)
no real names plz

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:29, archived)
Sean CMMMMMMMMMNGS

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:46, archived)
What about deeveedeefeeever

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 22:51, archived)
What about bollocks

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 23:55, archived)
dvdfuvur

(, Wed 17 Apr 2024, 6:38, archived)
is it another bass? or something different?

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:25, archived)
Yes. It’s one of them
A cheap Chinese one. Could be great. Could be shitpoo.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:30, archived)
They raise them in overcrowded fish farms and its cruel

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:31, archived)
Well. Yes.
That and the fact it will report all my secrets to the Chinese Secret Police!
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:46, archived)
You have secrets?
I thought you brainfarted every passing thought on here.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:47, archived)
Shhhh.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:53, archived)
Sometimes you can be really funny and then I warm to you
But then remember that you're a sick asshole who jokes about raping dead babies and it goes away
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 17:47, archived)
He'll be devastated at this scathing yet insightful character assassination

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 18:07, archived)
LOL ass ass

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 18:08, archived)
Oh, is this another bou account?
Off you fuck.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:10, archived)
You're so incredibly stupid.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:50, archived)
Haha yeah, 'jokes'

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:12, archived)
b3ta is a website that spawned a sick joke book
and a spin off website that descended very quickly into abject racism misogyny and ableism to the point that rob sold it.
So, getting huffy about one fairly innocuous joke on here suggests that this might not be the website for you.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:54, archived)
Where's the website that descended into racism
Misogyny and ableism?
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:06, archived)
I daren't give you the link
you might get upset
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:15, archived)
Go on
Live dangerously
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:22, archived)

www.fuckoffyoudullspastic.org
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:55, archived)

It says there's a typo. Is there supposed to be a dot between dull and spastic?
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:18, archived)
I bought a fat silver chain for £1150
in fairness it didn't annoy her, she just doesn't like it
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:27, archived)
For her or you?

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:30, archived)
me
it weighs 650g and is 2cm wide, not really one 'for the layteez'
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 16:18, archived)
fnur fnur

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 18:23, archived)

Hang a big clock on it.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:16, archived)
- l
etc...
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 22:19, archived)
you probably doomed it when you called her "a fat", to be fair

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:34, archived)

That's certainly how I read it.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:18, archived)
+Yasser Ar

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:39, archived)
I'm sure she'll get used to it and presumably you unchain her when you're at home.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 18:22, archived)
Ooh what new instrument?
I'm tempted to get an acoustic bass.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:48, archived)
This
www.thomann.de/gb/harley_benton_hbz_2005fl_nt_deluxe_series.htm
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:54, archived)
Can't argue with that price (literally the same price I paid for my Dean in the 1990s!)
and it looks lovely. Reviews suggest you might need to do some sanding and rewiring though.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 16:08, archived)
Pink oboe

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:09, archived)
Skin flute

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:10, archived)
let me play you the song of my people

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:41, archived)
Meat bassoon

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:13, archived)
Big veiny throbbing spunky cocktrumpet

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:22, archived)
It's just my snoring
It's really bad.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 17:42, archived)
Breakwater 4/20 sale started
peanut butter jelly time
Peanut butter breath is 38.58% this time, the highest credible numbers I've ever seen.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:31, archived)
yow
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⠈⠙⡖⠁⠀⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⣿⡟⣿⣿⡄⢨⠀⠁⠀⠀⠙⣷⣿⠀⢰⢠⡕⢳⡄⢻⡇⣴⡇⣷⠀⣿⠀⡟⢳⣥⠈⡔⣴⣿⠛⠀⠀⠀⠋⢡⠈⣾⣿⣷⣿⡆⢸⣿⠀⠀⠀⢠⠙⢲⠁
⠈⠱⠰⠁⠀⠀⠄⠘⣿⡖⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣷⣶⣶⣶⣬⣧⣦⣮⣵⣬⣧⣸⣧⣵⣘⣼⣧⣿⣤⣵⣢⣽⣶⣤⣥⣤⣾⣶⣷⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢋⣿⠿⠀⠀⠀⠂⡉⠆⠀
⠀⠀⠣⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⠘⢿⣎⣿⣿⣟⠛⢿⣿⣿⣿⡈⢭⠉⠙⢻⡏⠛⣿⡿⠟⠻⣿⣿⠿⣿⣿⡿⠻⢿⣿⠛⠛⣿⠛⠉⢹⡇⣸⣿⣾⡿⠟⢛⣿⣿⣏⣼⠋⠀⡀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠀⠀
⠐⠈⠀⠡⢀⠀⠀⡥⢁⢠⣿⡿⣗⠀⢀⠀⠈⠙⠻⢿⣿⣧⡀⣼⠇⠀⠘⣧⠀⠀⢹⡇⠀⠈⣿⠀⠀⢸⡟⠀⠀⣿⡄⣠⣿⣿⠟⠋⠁⢠⠀⠀⠸⣿⢿⣇⠈⡡⠀⢀⠀⠐⡈⠐⠀
⠀⠘⠠⢍⡢⣄⡀⠀⢳⣟⢣⠐⡌⠀⠀⠀⠀⠰⣄⠀⠙⡿⣷⣿⡆⠀⠀⣻⠀⠀⣼⠇⣀⢠⣿⡄⠁⣼⡁⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⠋⣀⠀⠰⠀⠠⠀⠀⢸⢋⠜⢿⡷⠀⢠⢠⣉⠦⢁⠌⠀
⡀⡌⢆⢢⢳⡽⣿⡃⢸⣟⣢⠑⡄⠀⠀⠀⡁⢀⠙⣾⠀⠻⡾⣿⣿⣷⣷⣿⣴⣶⣿⠿⣿⡿⢿⣷⣶⣼⣿⣶⣾⣿⡿⢺⠀⢼⢤⡁⠀⡁⠀⢀⣐⣸⣬⣿⢁⠘⣶⢯⡞⡤⢃⠄⡄
⢽⣒⠀⢂⠣⣟⣿⣧⠈⠉⠡⠉⢀⠀⠀⡀⠀⠈⠀⠈⢂⢅⠳⡘⣧⣿⢻⣿⣿⣴⣿⣷⣿⣷⣿⣧⣾⣿⡻⣟⣭⡆⢥⠛⣧⠰⠀⠛⠆⢀⡴⠋⠈⠙⢉⠁⠂⢸⢿⣯⠜⡁⠂⢸⡷
⠀⣠⠐⠤⠊⠌⣾⣿⠄⠀⠻⠖⠈⠄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠬⠠⢇⠈⣽⢸⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⠿⣭⠀⣼⠿⠄⠀⠀⠀⠠⠀⡀⠠⠱⠾⠂⢀⡽⣷⡈⠆⠁⢒⠀⡠
⠀⠀⢀⣠⠐⣈⠣⡝⠊⠁⣶⡄⠌⠑⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠀⠛⠈⢻⡑⢆⡩⣿⣛⢿⣿⠟⣭⠻⣿⡿⢟⣻⡧⢘⣾⠟⠒⠠⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⠁⢂⣤⡔⡄⠈⢝⡡⢃⡀⢰⣀⡐⢀
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 21:48, archived)
Hi guy's, it's me, the Mongdaddy, hows it going
Sputnik, Cauliflower, Wibble Jib-Jib!
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:36, archived)
Weather doesn't look great for my holiday, hopefully the carp like it

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:38, archived)
looks like dry but a bit chilly in Vienna, that's good for sightseeing I think
hope it's not a total washout for you
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:41, archived)
Looks dry ish, just a bit chilly

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:08, archived)
they'll be hungry

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:14, archived)
Fingers crossed, could have gone all inclusive to barbados for the amount its costing

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:24, archived)
all you'd catch there is crabs

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:36, archived)
To be fair, it is a very convincing imitation of all people with mental illnesses.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:38, archived)
it's pretty much verbatim what my grandma said during her final phase of dementia

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:42, archived)
It's even more convincing than Rowan Atkinson with pencils up his nose

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:01, archived)
Pretty sure the residents in the nursing home dementia unit I just reviewed are all faking it.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:42, archived)
pretending not to like it up them?

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:03, archived)
Needless to say, you very much got the better of those awful, imaginary, lager-swilling working class people.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:46, archived)
What the fuck are you on, mate

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:56, archived)
high on life, m8,
high on life
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:07, archived)
I am now doing a small jig on the spot.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:14, archived)
KLAXXXONNNNNNN

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:16, archived)
And with that they walked away.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:20, archived)
^ had the last laugh

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 14:26, archived)
morning

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 6:55, archived)
Fuck you, Jadzia Ashton. Fuck you.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 7:38, archived)
120 an hour mate.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 7:40, archived)
I'll pop over at lunch

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 8:08, archived)
'Beans' on 'toast'

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 11:28, archived)
Blimey that's fast!

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 10:09, archived)
Alright boobs

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 10:15, archived)
Watcha

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 12:16, archived)
I hope this is true
*click*
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 7:55, archived)
Didn't happen.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 7:56, archived)
Some people are very rude
that's my opinion.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 9:19, archived)
Have you ever been on /talk?

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 9:24, archived)
I'm aware of his work

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 9:40, archived)
Bollocks

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 10:14, archived)
ARSEHOLE

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 11:18, archived)
morning
looking to recruit a few people, check out this guy's profile description:

'My name's [redacted]. I am good at my any type of job.i am really punctually about my time.i remain calm of any serious situation as well as can handle my customers needed things goodly.'

It reads like a parody, jfc
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 10:30, archived)
That's me, looking forward to working with you.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 11:42, archived)
probably forerign you horrible racist

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 12:52, archived)
or AI

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 12:52, archived)
I comes professionally

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 12:54, archived)
Well
I don’t stay calm. As I get older I flip out more and more frequently. I had a full on meltdown like a 2 year old yesterday when I could not find any second class stamps. It’s probably dementia.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 15:05, archived)
Gobbo was also involved in foiling the Tomato Tins drug syndicate

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 11:39, archived)
big comes

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 12:54, archived)
my feet hurt

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 13:09, archived)
What's your favourite IRBM?
I'd have to say mine's the Hyunmoo-5.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:56, archived)
Are you black?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:36, archived)
You simply must be Bou.

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:04, archived)
I don't mean any offense by the question.
I'm just curious.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:44, archived)
Do you keep a black deathlist too?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:21, archived)
Huh uh huh huh black death

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 23:11, archived)
I don't know what you're on about
I just wanted to know if you're black 🖤 and I don't think it's racist for me to ask. It's just that you react so vehemently to racism on a website that trashes basically everything that it makes me suspect that you are either black or a closet racist. Just an observation.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 17:53, archived)
there's a third option
he's a fucking dick
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 19:49, archived)
I think he has you on ignore

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:49, archived)
Didn't mean any offense then.
If that's what you think b3ta is, and if those are your 'suspicions' then you truly are a stupid cunt.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:43, archived)
Ah! Closet racist. Got it.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 20:48, archived)
Just curious then.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 22:34, archived)
Inter-rectal ballistic missile?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:34, archived)
Launched from one rectum into another?
Well, I'm aroused.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:13, archived)
A fascinating concept, butt to butt warfare.

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:17, archived)
-istic +bag

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:34, archived)
The Beastiezzz

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:35, archived)
An accurately flung custard pie

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 22:46, archived)
Prevening

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 17:48, archived)
7th wedding anniversary today
We're celebrating by being in different countries, it's gr8
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 17:51, archived)
next year celebrate by being in different people

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:02, archived)
^ posting from Wales

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:35, archived)
fuck you and fuck everyone you came in on

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:03, archived)
I think we're past that now

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:32, archived)
I'm well up for it

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:36, archived)
you can fuck off

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:38, archived)
Here's a Doctor Dyslexia qotw post for your pleasure ok
Friend of mine was walking down some sidewalks with a tie on his head like a bandana and a squirt gun.
and a girl yelled at him "what the hell is wrong with you"
He replied cleverly "I RAPE CATS FOR GOD SAKES!"
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:07, archived)

A few months ago I was out drinking with a couple of mates and we found ourselves in the outside area of a large pub. It was quite a busy evening; there were no tables free so we were stood up by a small outside bar, chatting and smoking, keeping a look out for any tables that happened to be vacated. As I glanced towards the table opposite where we were stood, I saw two males sniff what was probably cocaine off of a card and up into their noses. I quickly looked away; it wasn’t any of my business, but I was surprised at how brazen they had been. I didn’t say anything to either of my mates, but looked over again and realised that both of the males were now approaching me.

As they neared, I remember thinking ‘He we go’. They were ‘proper lads’. You know the type; love boozing and chatting up the ‘birds’, three-styles-in-one haircuts, both dressed in attire usually associated with Jeremy Kyle guests and were walking like constipated apes. Proper-fucking-lads.

“What the fuck you looking at, mate?”

He was quite big, so I pretended I hadn’t seen him.

“Oi, mate. What the fuck were you looking at?”

I turned slowly round to face them.

“Me?” I started, pointing at myself. “Nothing”.

“You fucking what?”

“Nothing”

This went on for a couple of minutes; them asking me what I was looking at, and me responding with the same answer. My mates, ever helpful, stood and watched, sipping their drinks slowly. Eventually the two lads got bored with asking me the same question,

“Right, you little cunt, what’s your fucking name”

With that, the larger of the two grabbed me by my collar and tried to pull me towards him. I stood my ground and for some reason, my Granddad’s (RIP) only ever words of wisdom came into my head – ‘If you’re ever in trouble, act like you’ve got a mental illness’.
Before I could process this thought completely in my head, I felt my mouth open and I started speaking in a posh gentleman’s voice,

“They call me The Mongdaddy, boys. It’s a pleasure to meet you. Sputnik, Cauliflower, Wibble Jib-Jib!”

I extended my hand to the lad who wasn’t trying his best to remove my clothing.

“Mongdaddy? What the fuck are you on, mate”

“Why nothing fellow”, I carried on. Still I kept my posh voice. My mates now had their backs turned to us and were slowly sidestepping away from the scene.

”And it’s The Mongdaddy, parp, parp”.

With that, I pulled my hand down like you do when trying to get a haulage driver to sound his horn. I felt the grip on my collar loosen and the big lad stepped back away from me.

“Are you fucking nuts?”

“Oh God no, treacle pie. The Mongdaddy is perfectly normal. Hoopla-Hoopla, come and play the hoopla! Whistle. Flute. Hairy Biscuit”

I was now doing a small jig on the spot. Out of the corner of my eye I could see a few people watching me. I must have looked like an absolute nut-job.

“Hoopla?” The lads sounded as confused as I was.

“Five attempts for a pound, my dear. Get in the cockpit and roll out the kipper”.

“Fuck off, you freak”

And with that they walked away. I returned to my mates, necked my pint and left for somewhere different.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:20, archived)
You know the type: love lying and chatting up the 'b3tans'
Who wrote this btw? I almost never went there, this is why really. I'm almost embarrassed to read it.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:24, archived)
"# Minty fresh and full of yeasty goodness. I used to work with children on a housing estate in London"
"work"
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:11, archived)
I quite liked the idea of qotw initially, share some funny life experiences, naive of me

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:29, archived)
I preferred it when it degenerated into trying to find the most laboured Pato Banton pun ever,
shame rob canned us all before we found it.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:35, archived)
rob went from permissive host to content vampire at some point, I think someone at the mirror group bit him
'content vampire', you saw it here first
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 22:04, archived)
contire, maybe yours will catch a blood-borne disease

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 22:50, archived)
I didn't read it then, won't read it now. Qftw was weird. I understood the making pictures in photoshop but I never got those cunts. Hope they are all dead. Unfunny wankers.
There .
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:58, archived)
Clickin this

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 21:14, archived)
I just looked up the original out of idle curiosity.
The only thing more embarrassing than this post was the credulous replies it got. Fucking hell.
(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 6:28, archived)
Legless on classic form

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 6:31, archived)
This caused me physical pain to read.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 0:36, archived)
It's appalling on many levels.

(, Tue 16 Apr 2024, 6:32, archived)
Fuck off etc...

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:35, archived)
^ the mongdaddy

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:10, archived)
I'm worried
Too many wars
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 11:27, archived)
I'm knackered
woke up at 3:20am and couldn't get back to sleep. Too much whizzing around in my head.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 12:04, archived)

zing around
head japper
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 12:05, archived)
The night before last I dreamt I found an old bottle of beujolias
that was way past its best but I opened it anyway. Absolute nightmare.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:01, archived)
Early waking can be a sign of depression
Or maybe you just napped too much yesterday
Or were too inactive yesterday
If it happens regularly ask Putin
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:15, archived)
most likely the first one, given the shit I've been through in recent years
I'm not a napper and I did an hour's high intensity exercise every morning Fri-Sun.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:26, archived)
Maybe chat to Putin about it
Gaz him. If it's a once in a while thing I wouldn't worry but if you're getting depressed, its better to nip it in the bud and get some counseling. Trust me I know.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:34, archived)
move to the southern hemisphere
fewer people, fewer wars
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 12:18, archived)
Then I have to go back to South Africa
No thanks
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:13, archived)
Or perhaps
not enough?
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 12:51, archived)
What do you mean?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:14, archived)
We need one really really big one.

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 16:47, archived)
This is fine

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:13, archived)
War is fine?
No m8y
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:14, archived)
Yes but it's fine for you to be worried about it.

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:24, archived)
Ok. Yes and I am. Very very worried.

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:31, archived)
How many currently ongoing wars are acceptable, would you say?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 14:46, archived)
None

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 15:07, archived)
how many ongoing chat accounts are acceptable?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:05, archived)
Well I only have 1
🤥
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:51, archived)
I'm well up for it

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 16:10, archived)
you can fuck off

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 18:05, archived)
Up for war?
No it's horrible.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:24, archived)
i have actively avoided all news since the Ukraine thing started
I've never been happier. If the nukes hit I'll worry for as long as the flash takes, other than that I'm not giving a hoot.


I did jury duty last year and nobody believed i didn't know who the current prime minister was, i didn't know, i didn't care
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 17:08, archived)
That's one way to handle it but
Sometimes you can save your life by being informed
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:26, archived)
P.s. its Rishi Sunak
And he looks like Alf
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:28, archived)
This is fake news, I know 2 Alfs & the prime minister doesn't look like either of them

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 19:42, archived)
+Garnet

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 20:36, archived)
morning

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 6:27, archived)
bou bou dolls

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 7:13, archived)
Bollocks

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 8:38, archived)
Morning and goodbye.
Cheers
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 7:41, archived)
Finally got round to playing the Resi 3 remake.

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 7:47, archived)
he said goodbye, are you deaf?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:22, archived)
Well sink my ships and call me scuttled
it's Monday!
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 9:00, archived)
Clearly an Alestorm fan

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 9:27, archived)

Excellent.
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 10:10, archived)
that has to be some kind of euphemism, there are no real fans surely

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 11:29, archived)
This is the first I've heard of them
I wonder if they have AVAST back catalogue?
(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 12:49, archived)
no

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:22, archived)
Help ma boab

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 9:27, archived)
Please don't post in my threads

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 9:28, archived)
Post

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 9:32, archived)
lovely sunny day here, forecast says high of 78f/25c, might sit indoors with my hoodie on

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:52, archived)
roll call

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 22:10, archived)
bun holler

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 22:21, archived)
bap broadcast

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 22:25, archived)
croissant callback

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 23:54, archived)
muffin missive

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 0:40, archived)
OJ Simpson to be cremated and no plans to donate brain to science, lawyer says

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 0:56, archived)
oh that head banger syndrome he got from banging broads

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 4:29, archived)
broads? how are things back there in the 50s?

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 13:21, archived)
Crumpet confirmation

(, Mon 15 Apr 2024, 8:33, archived)
Have you got any antiques at home
that you'd be willing to take to Antiques Roadshow?
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:19, archived)
Alright fiona bruce

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:27, archived)
The only thing in my house as old as me is my cooker

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:37, archived)
aww

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:34, archived)
My house is pretty old, does that count?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:41, archived)
is it a counting house?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:26, archived)
It has a right count living in it

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:40, archived)
Count Willies
i hope
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:42, archived)
Your mother's mum's wank cunt shit bollocks fuck a horse slasher cunt twat fucking shitcunt occasional table

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:44, archived)
ooh look it's signed underneath, it says your mother's mum's wank cunt shit bollocks fuck a horse slasher cunt twat fucking shitcunt

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:27, archived)
unfortunately it's got a big crack down the middle

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:39, archived)
occasionally

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 22:54, archived)
No

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:47, archived)
Lots.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 20:48, archived)
got my grandfather's morse code key from ww2 (he was in the signals)

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:16, archived)
Was he blue or red

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:16, archived)
white probably

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:18, archived)
what are the options

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:27, archived)
arsenic or strychnine

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:32, archived)
not those ones

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 22:55, archived)
no, soz

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 21:46, archived)
Acon, beacon, seacon......MNNEURGH!!!
ah that takes me back. Might dig out my old copy of Tongue Tied: Fifty Years of Friendship in a Subnormality Hospital for a cheeky nostalgic wank. It's worth nearly a oner now, kinell
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:22, archived)
Fall Out on Prime is a bit good
but you didn't ask me anything about that
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:24, archived)
I like violent revenge films and crime capers, ideally set in London
I'm classy like that
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:26, archived)
have you seen going in style?
not exactly violent, but quite clever and amusing
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:09, archived)
Just watched warm bodies
Loved it
Thanks!
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 18:46, archived)
looking that up, I'm afraid I am unable to watch anything featuring an actor named 'Walton Goggins', I'm sorry
but I do have a related question: why should you never buy Russian underpants?
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:28, archived)
might crack a Herald of Free Enterprise, Shuttle disaster or 'Ethiopian' gag next
I like to keep things topical
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:30, archived)
"Herald of Free Enterprise", how much clearer can an omen be?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:50, archived)
Wally Goggs
He is brilliant in it! Claxon etc...
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:37, archived)
because you don't want to expose your eastern front?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:40, archived)
BECAUSE CHERNOBYL FALLOUT!!!!!!!!!!
of course now we all know it's actually in Ukraine but I felt I should stay true to the 80s
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:41, archived)
in that case
can you get me a can of quatro and a spira?
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:47, archived)
quatro was the fucking business eh
Texan bar ruled the roost for my brother and me. A man's gotta chew, what a man's gotta chew.

Things have gone a bit 'Peter Kay' here, whoops
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:11, archived)
quatro was awesome

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:29, archived)
also, bit harsh
nobody here is quite up to peter kay's level of unfunny beakering shitcunt
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:36, archived)
I am.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:51, archived)


(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:57, archived)
I ordered a book for my fishing holiday . Looks a good biography

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:34, archived)
oh aye, whose bio is it?
you must be off any day now right
Vienna for me Weds, got a few things booked, wine tasting, day trip, fancy dinner etc
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:44, archived)
Have a waltz
A good hard solid waltz
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:52, archived)
I'm having a waltz aszzzzzz

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:12, archived)
Friday I'm off. Enjoy your holiday
www.lawrencetierneybook.com/
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:29, archived)
ace
have you read any of edward bunker's books?
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:35, archived)
I'm trying to stay awake
fucking hate the week before I get my B12 jab, always end up shattered
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:41, archived)
are you more, or less likely to have a sleepwalking incident when you're knackered or when you're not
or does it make no difference?
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:46, archived)
tiredness seems to have no effect
stress makes it worse, which is why it's calmed down considerably since I blocked the mental. only let myself out once in the last 6 months and I'm pretty sure I went 2 weeks last month without a single incident
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:49, archived)
I went to see Back To Black
I give it a solid 3 out of 5.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:04, archived)
Awwww I was hoping for more
60% is not enough for me to venture to the flicks
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:06, archived)
What was the last thing you saw at the cinema?
(and don't say Grease).
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:10, archived)
Oppenhammer
How ever it is spelt/spelled
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:25, archived)
was never really a fan of hers
so I will give it a miss
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:08, archived)
she was OK
but if she'd have been around in the time of the singers she was copying were, she'd have sold fuck all records. The dude who ruined her life owes a mate of mine two grand, fact fans. Unless he's now dead obv
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:14, archived)
Probs did an OD

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:26, archived)
I don't agree she would have sold fuck all records
She had an amazing voice and would have been just as big back then.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:26, archived)
oh, I'm not denying she had talent
just not my taste
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:28, archived)
Pished, aye?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:53, archived)
You will be glad to know The Daz Man has finished cleaning up, and also had a pre match bowel movement
Life is sweet
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 13:57, archived)
Danny Baker or Shane Richie?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:04, archived)
I prefer the talent that is Guy Richie

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:19, archived)
i've not cleaned up but i have had a sticky shit

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:13, archived)
I hope you wiped well
And washed your hands
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:19, archived)
i wiped my bum with someone else's bum

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:28, archived)
Good lad

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:49, archived)
That was mine m8

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:22, archived)
It's all that NUTELLA
Stuff comes out looking the same as it went in
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:51, archived)
it's so delicious tho!
less so coming out
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:26, archived)
no it isn't
it's far too sweet
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:53, archived)
busy day so far here
exercise, cleaning, made a ox cheek and brisket stew which will be ready to eat at 7
might go pub or watch a film whilst the fucker cooks
might not, jfc why all the questions
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:28, archived)
I have also been at stool, but the experience was somewhat disappointing
keyword: loose
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:30, archived)
Mine was the other extreme
Took yonks
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:54, archived)
Prithee, whilst.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:45, archived)
Hey nonny nonny

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:55, archived)
I'm done cleaning and I'm exhausted
This place is not big but it was filthy.
Sis. It is sparkling now though. I even washed the dog.
Anyway...
Have had some nice food and some chocolate and now I will watch some Amazon Prime
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:43, archived)
which parts of that were euphemisms and which were innuendos?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:46, archived)
None and none
You may take all of that literally
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:50, archived)
hitler

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:51, archived)
Goebbels

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:52, archived)
Lol in u end

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:56, archived)
Anything good on?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 14:57, archived)
I like science fiction apocalyptic stuff so I am scouring the site for it
I seem to have watched everything good
Any suggestions are welcome
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:16, archived)
warm bodies is good
zombie version of romeo and juliet
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:40, archived)
Ah thank you!
I'll go and find that
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:41, archived)
if you fancy a bit of Austen
pride and prejudice and zombies is another good mashup
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:52, archived)
Thank you!

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:12, archived)
I'm 'washing the dog' as I type this

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:25, archived)
fyi
you were marginally less shit as president putin
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:00, archived)
you were marginally less shit before you joined

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:08, archived)
zing

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 17:37, archived)
I was going to give it my all
but I gave it my some and just did the dishes and put a wash on
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 15:45, archived)
Tomorrow is another day.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 16:12, archived)
mornring

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:30, archived)
Morn Ring to rule them all

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:31, archived)
sore ring to poo them all

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:33, archived)

Bum Ring to poo them all,
Bum Ring to push them.
Bum Ring to shit them all,
And in the toilet flûsh them.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:42, archived)
One does not simply walk into Turdor.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:09, archived)

I only ask for the strength to defend my peep hole.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:23, archived)
AND MY ASS

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:31, archived)
POO-TAY-TOES

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:32, archived)
YOU CANNOT PASS

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:40, archived)
-p

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:13, archived)
Morning

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:31, archived)
mornring no 2

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:33, archived)
Is it Poo Conversation Sunday?
Morning
Family back this afternoon I need to clean the place up:(
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:12, archived)
i know how you feel
there's shit everywhere
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:18, archived)
I have to sort this place out, too
I spend so much time cleaning up after other people that I have no time or energy to clean my own home
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:29, archived)
i just can't be buggered

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:30, archived)

Through God all things are possible.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:57, archived)
I was thinking of asking /chat ladies to push the Hoover round a bit
Ladies like cleaning stuff u no
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:21, archived)
No we fucking don't

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:54, archived)
I fucking hate it

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:07, archived)
me too and i'm a bird

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:14, archived)
Bless 'em
Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:16, archived)
I also have to clean today and I am procrastinating
I hate cleaning but this place is a tip. I think I'll get the broom and sit with it a while until inspiration strikes.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:41, archived)

That's how people get accused of witchery.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:59, archived)
Hahaha! Well I'll try not to ride it.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 11:21, archived)
Poo

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:10, archived)
morning

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:22, archived)
Morning

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:17, archived)
poo

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:22, archived)
Morning!
I'm off to watch that new Amy Whinehouse movie in a bit.
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 10:40, archived)
she dies at the end, just sayin

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 11:26, archived)
so does everyone

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 11:36, archived)
apart from hardcore, obv
hardcore will never die
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 11:38, archived)
yes johnny

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:15, archived)

Well you know the score
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:55, archived)
Oh noe
Deaded?
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:19, archived)
He's lying, it just fades to black at the end

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:29, archived)
Darth Vader's Luke's father
Spoiler alert
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:53, archived)
Poo poo willy willy bum drawers

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:53, archived)

youtu.be/e5MAg_yWsq8?si=rXN8k2GhlVgTxl1_
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 0:43, archived)

senior prom dancing with my wife to be , now dancing by myself remembering you my love , rest in peace my love Judy
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 0:54, archived)
no-one could blame you for digging her up for a chat
'chat', also, senior pron lol
(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 1:40, archived)
Nice

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:47, archived)
I'll have that in my head all day now.

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:49, archived)
air?

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 12:17, archived)
Yeah so anyway.
Alright.
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:00, archived)
Bollocks?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 21:46, archived)
Saturday night's all right for bollocks

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 21:52, archived)
Don't mind if I do.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 22:08, archived)

one ball each
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 22:12, archived)
I do love me some Vic Berger
www.youtube.com/watch?v=OE55TgY0deM
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 22:35, archived)
No thanks, I've just eaten.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 22:25, archived)
nothing wrong?
you mean apart from the online stalking, harrassment and all the other deeply disturbing shit you type?
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:17, archived)
ah shit
that didn't work
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:17, archived)
should never have logged out to read her bullshit

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:17, archived)
she's not even going to see it anyway

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:18, archived)
sadface

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:19, archived)
Of course he will :)

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 19:14, archived)
alright mofs, what natural phenomenon next, you've done earthquake, eclipse? I can't think of any e left

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:02, archived)
poonami

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:16, archived)
we had the brood x cicadas a few years back too, we've been flooded out before, there was the recent plague
thinking about it, another 4 years of trump might qualify
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:42, archived)
We need an e , eruption? Any active shit ?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:44, archived)
Just my bowl right now

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:45, archived)
didn't read question proply soz

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:52, archived)
You should be disappointed in yourself for failing .

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 21:08, archived)
it had to happen sometime, i suppose.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 21:23, archived)
now you can relax

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 21:48, archived)
yeah i can stop worrying about it now. feels nice.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 21:50, archived)
Well it shouldn't. You've just doubled the pressure. Raise your standards, you are letting us all down.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 22:01, archived)

Take away everything if it feels fine
Catch a shape in the circles of my mind
Make me feel like I belong to you
Make me feel it, even if it ain't true
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 22:29, archived)
no you've gone fucking weird now pull yourself together

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 23:12, archived)
i feel like i'm a pair of curtains!

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 0:09, archived)
well the light was on

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 1:41, archived)
but that was my best friend's room!

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 2:05, archived)
Jamaica

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 3:54, archived)
no that was her parents

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 8:31, archived)
it's perfect

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:17, archived)
hello

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:17, archived)
yo

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:17, archived)
did you try to reply to bou 3000?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:18, archived)
yeah

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:19, archived)
Bustedzzz

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:10, archived)
Hi

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:21, archived)
sup

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:26, archived)
Tina Guo y/n/o

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 18:49, archived)
she's tiny

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 19:08, archived)
hold me closer tina guoy/n/o

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 19:11, archived)
I like petite women

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 19:56, archived)
tiny hands are the only way to make your cock look normal sized

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:16, archived)
Exactly.
Plus, they look just the right level of underage.
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:21, archived)
alright spanishfly

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:27, archived)
alright

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:30, archived)
If all else fails, jews did it. Got form.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 19:58, archived)
says the catholic

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:17, archived)
Exactly

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 20:45, archived)
‘A jaw-dropping must-see’ (Cinablend)
CIVIL WAR! In cinemas NOW
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:56, archived)
Still better than a ‘Bou’ post
Regardless, do fuck off you spamming cunt
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:59, archived)
Fuck you Cheers alright?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:00, archived)
Please delete your account

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:01, archived)
Fuck you

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:01, archived)
^ upset

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:02, archived)
Yes I'm in a bad mood and I'm sick of it
I've done nothing wrong now leave me the fuck alone
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:03, archived)
Paul McCartney’s rejected lyrics for Yesterday

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:05, archived)
Cheers

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:30, archived)
Stop bullying me

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:01, archived)
Ok

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:02, archived)
Thanks :)

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:05, archived)
I’m the spammer?
Have you ever read the shit you type? Would not recommend

Oh Cheers, cheers fuck me
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:17, archived)
Why are you promoting a film here?
It's hardly the right place.
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:26, archived)
probably thought we'd have nothing better to do than watch it
i'm watching it now
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:28, archived)
alright brb

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:27, archived)
Hi

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:33, archived)
clickin dis

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:27, archived)

b3ta.com/talk/8409243
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:29, archived)
had to fucking log out to read that

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:36, archived)
he meant spanner

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:27, archived)
Just read about that today. Looks good.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:59, archived)
You read about it and it LOOKS good? You’re not the Bou I know

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:04, archived)
Who are you?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:05, archived)
it'll be Bou~ by next week i expect

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:09, archived)
Just stop it now ok?
It's not me
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:10, archived)
and after that, you can listen to the excellent musical treat that is I glued my balls to my butthole again

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:50, archived)
lol

(, Sun 14 Apr 2024, 9:56, archived)
Go fuck yourself.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:52, archived)
defo bbq weather today
might spatchcock a chicken lol
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:22, archived)
DJ PALL Nice

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:28, archived)
Oh no really?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:53, archived)
judge him Queef!

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:23, archived)
Yay for summer
Says the Mighty Bou
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:29, archived)
Daz Man says thumbs up for Summer

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:48, archived)
It gets very hot here. 40° and higher
But I love it
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:50, archived)
Cock lol

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:47, archived)
he never said that you're cheating
no wait he did my bad
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 13:20, archived)
Pissing down here, sad times

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 13:04, archived)
Boo

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:53, archived)
Too cold for a bbq here

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 13:24, archived)
they warm up

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 14:53, archived)
21 here, shorts and t shirt

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:54, archived)
so like, 20 shorts and 1 t-shirt?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:25, archived)
Not the best Beastie Boys tune, that.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:47, archived)
20 turntables and a microphone

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:54, archived)
not going outside i'm comfy

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 14:36, archived)

omf unt
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:47, archived)

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Exploding_head_syndrome
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 14:39, archived)
BANG!

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 14:52, archived)
Yeah I sometimes have that
It's a bit annoying
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 14:53, archived)
I've experienced something like it a couple times in the dim past, there was no sense at the time that it was not real
Do you ever see a flash or anything?
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 14:58, archived)
- a
+e light
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 15:30, archived)
i can't make any sense of that I'll just assume you're calling me a cunt

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:10, archived)
why are you calling me a cunt

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:12, archived)
if the dick fits

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:26, archived)
oh it's fit all right

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:40, archived)
Fleshlight
You sausage faced dozer friend
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:42, archived)
i think he got it

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:53, archived)
How is face sausage? You know nothing.
yeah I've tried to laugh this off but I'm not happy.
I'll tell you what Daz, I didn't want to stoop to your level but the sad truth is you're not a very good rapper and everyone knows it. Ok.
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:03, archived)
Yeah sometimes
It's just really sudden and quite jarring
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:51, archived)
weird

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:59, archived)
0/10, doesn't even alliterate.

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:00, archived)
spaniel

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:09, archived)
speckled sparrow

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:11, archived)
bird brain

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:14, archived)
Check your email

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 16:55, archived)
Ooh, new tunes!

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:03, archived)
...to listen to while you look at the pics he sent, hmmm?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 17:28, archived)
Morning
I'm feeling rough as, so no shouting please?
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 7:34, archived)

rough as a sandy gulch?
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 9:52, archived)
Rough as a robber's dog

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:18, archived)
hard to gauge

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:23, archived)
OK

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:14, archived)
How's Scouseland?
It's the dog food derby today innit
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:19, archived)
Yeah
I don't really follow any kind of sports, but plenty of people I know do. Been invited to a grand national party, but I'm not big on day drinking, fucks with my sleep routine.
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 11:48, archived)
swed

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 13:31, archived)
ALRIGHT

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:15, archived)
Ssshhhh
Grownups are talking
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:20, archived)
Which ones, 'DazSampson'?

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:45, archived)
The Daz Man says yeah

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:55, archived)
not great here either
I'm now at 'productive cough', very tedious
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:16, archived)
Try not to die
Hot toddy does it for me
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:20, archived)
Moribund phlegmsite

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 10:22, archived)
Halls mentholyptus sweets work great
Only the ones in the black wrapper, though
(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 11:50, archived)
Good afternoon

(, Sat 13 Apr 2024, 12:29, archived)

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