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[challenge entry] Because there's no such thing as 'too soon'


*EDIT* - now with some frames removed, which may make some of the thread a bit confusing.

From the New Theme Parks challenge. See all 182 entries (closed)

(songsforeveryone, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:32, archived)
# No...
(Dooley, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:33, archived)
# that wallpaper is fucking horrible
(I helped save b3ta! mictoboy shitting in your cunt since, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:33, archived)
# well, it's well done, but...
(I helped save b3ta! plentyofants more ghee, vicar?, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:34, archived)
# I can only agree with the message behind this
and the surprised yet confused look on his face
(Northern Lovely, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:35, archived)
# He's checking out the Specials Board...
...but he's left his kids specs at the apartment.
(Grandpa Flump Wee wee wee all the way home, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:37, archived)
# I don't give a shit what anybody says
Yes, I'd like the kid to come back and not have been fucked through the eyes for the last few weeks.

But if she does, social services should get her the fuck away from those two. Stupid, stupid idiots.
(songsforeveryone, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:37, archived)
# wouldn't the word 'unharmed' have been a slight improvement here?
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 17 May 2007, 15:38, archived)
# Hands up anyone here who
thinks she's been playing on swings and watching cartoons for the last few weeks?
(songsforeveryone, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:39, archived)
# I think that I might speak for all parents on here when I say
that I would prefer to think that until such time as it is proved otherwise that she has been taken in order to fulfil a motherly void in somebody else's life.

Life's just a bit easier that way.

/quite aware of the harsh realities of life blog


edit: I am also aware that b3ta is not the place to be if one is easily offended by anything.
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# I'm surprised abducted by Aliens hasn't been suggested
Until now
(I helped save b3ta! Barbarossa is not my real name, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:43, archived)
# of course
it's been staring us in the face all along

she's been taken by alien for probing.

i'm not sure if that better then the paedos or not?
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:46, archived)
# depends on the alien
(I helped save b3ta! swaza I'm bad, I'm bad. You know it. I'm bad., Thu 17 May 2007, 15:48, archived)
# I still like this
(I helped save b3ta! Big Ian has stopped changing his sig, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:55, archived)
# or dingoes
(I helped save b3ta! discomeats This canoe, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:47, archived)
# haha
cunt
(I helped save b3ta! Grundlebiscuit, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# *insert swinging on something else joke*
here
(I helped save b3ta! SiX and his hat, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:43, archived)
# I think she woke up and went out to the beach
and she's sharkfood, tbh.
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:44, archived)
# Pffft :)
(I helped save b3ta! Bohica Anne Frank's Bukkaki Tentacle Storm, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:40, archived)
# no
social services should smack them around a bit, but should not take the children away from them. cunt
(cs192 is sucking on a Koala at, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:40, archived)
# What's the difference between Social Services and a pit bull terrier?
You're likely to get at least part of your kid back from the pit bull terrier.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# now, this is funny
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 17 May 2007, 15:44, archived)
# I have two young dughters
i dont let them wander 5ft away from me when out and when there playing in the garden i check more frequently that 30 bloody minutes.
(I helped save b3ta! Gumuman practising surprise sex on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:44, archived)
# I bet you
eat meals with them too - thats what I don't get, every family holiday I went on we all ate together.
(I helped save b3ta! SiX and his hat, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:47, archived)
# Exatly
Holidays and time together is suposed to be the high points in parenthood
(I helped save b3ta! Gumuman practising surprise sex on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:51, archived)
# ^THIS^
Most definitely this.
(I helped save b3ta! RiffRaff lurking like a lurky thing, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:03, archived)
# Because as shocking as it may sound,
it takes less than 30 minutes to abduct a child*.




*probably.
(Slurpy The Frog, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:48, archived)
# Exactly my point
I bet the leash is even tighter when you're somewhere unfamiliar, too.

"They were only 100 yards away".

100 yards away from where I'm sitting is the A1. Any parent round here wouldn't let kids that age out of their sight for 30 seconds, let alone 30 minutes.
(songsforeveryone, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:50, archived)
# one of the theories for why man have a better spacial intelligence than women
is that girls are never allowed to wander by themselves by (over)protective parents.

You must realize that checking on them every 30 min is as efficient as a liquid ban on airplanes (i.e. it only makes sense under the assumption that all wrongdoings are "casual" and never properly planned)
(I helped save b3ta! Your watch is BACK, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:20, archived)
# The line that made me wince is
"feck her to death with her nonce friends".
It's too graphic because that is what might be happening now.
I think I will stand up and be counted now.
*stands up*
This has upset me.
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:39, archived)
# It may well be
I hope it's not, but it might me.

That's why you don't leave your kids alone when you go on holiday.
(songsforeveryone, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:41, archived)
# Gingerly raises hand in agreement
Gingerly as in slowly that is, but that one is just too far, and shame the main message is right.

(I helped save b3ta! The Tig and me, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# Me too
I hate to say it but I might have to stand up next to you as well. Well, actually I don;t hate to, I do it freely.
(I helped save b3ta! jon_tanner, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# it was slightly harsh
but it is an underlining unspoken subtext.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# I agree with you about the unspoken subtext
and I realise that if I was easily offended (trust me I'm not!) I wouldn't be here.
No way would I shout at the OP, I just felt the urge to stand up and state my opinion.
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:46, archived)
# Tis your right to do so
(I helped save b3ta! cooler_king That's no moon!, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:48, archived)
# tis your right as well
and duely noted.

hows things with you and the shop?

do you still have the tardis?
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:52, archived)
# The shop is going OK and the Tardis is still intact
but we took off the sound effects due to it driving everyone insane after a short while :)
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:05, archived)
# hahaha
i hope no-one flipped out.

mayeb you need some daleks to guard it.
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:20, archived)
# Also
Hope it isn't FP just cos of the subject. FP should be for talent/humour the last one that FP'd wasn't that clever at all

(I helped save b3ta! The Tig and me, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:46, archived)
# so FP has nothing to do with being a mods friend?
(I helped save b3ta! prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:51, archived)
# You just leave the cash
in the envelope, and hey presto!
(I helped save b3ta! The Tig and me, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:00, archived)
# "Jokes are better than technique."
I think that's a subtle hint to include humour in posts.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:41, archived)
# ^THIS^
(I helped save b3ta! wotofco pissing in your swimming pool, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:43, archived)
# tell that to my wife
(I helped save b3ta! Gumuman practising surprise sex on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:55, archived)
# it's wrong

but it right.

i WOO but society makes me feel a small amount of shame.

damn you society!
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:41, archived)
# oh dear
that's quite low...I see what you're saying and i agree...the rule is though; the lower you go the funnier it has to be, and although this is fairly funny, it's not funny enough for the subject. in my opinion...
(I helped save b3ta! Grundlebiscuit, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:41, archived)
# pish
this is b3ta dear man - your rules of decency left when you signed up (well myne did, I feel violated now)
(I helped save b3ta! SiX and his hat, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# dont get me wrong
i have no decency, it's a matter of whether something is funny or not
(I helped save b3ta! Grundlebiscuit, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:50, archived)
# am
damn good point there sir. Indeed it is borderline funny.
(I helped save b3ta! SiX and his hat, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:53, archived)
# I
like this

but then I'm quite sick
(I helped save b3ta! SiX and his hat, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:41, archived)
# Don't ask me why
But that just crosses the line somehow.

But then again, what do I know, I'm the person that made a Cho Seung-Hui video a couple of days after the Virginia shootings.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Propps, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# but that was funny
(I helped save b3ta! Griffin Saver Something, something, 2006, something., Thu 17 May 2007, 15:45, archived)
# Thank you.


(I helped save b3ta! Monty Propps, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:46, archived)
# ^This
(I helped save b3ta! Flowerpot No longer has the vapours thanks to DTH, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:51, archived)
# And thank you, too.
:)
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Propps, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:57, archived)
# No
Unless you can see the fine line I wouldn't try to walk along it.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:42, archived)
# I think
the line is about here somewhere...

www.b3ta.com/board/7197314
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:46, archived)
# That's awful. :(
But funny :)
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Propps, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:47, archived)
# I noticed it, it's out of my head now
And I probably won't do any more.

There seem to be lots of occasional b3tans who stretch to do something like this because they think it's funny just to do something sick. I reckon there's loads of them out there who see something like this on the news and, instead of any sort of empathising, think, "Great! Now I can do a picture on b3ta!"
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:50, archived)
# To be honest, although I don't post that much
The whole story has just pissed me off from the start. I did this out of anger as opposed to fishing around for a FP.

Obviously, it's terrible that someone has run off with this kid. The little attention that's been paid to how stupid the parents were in leaving them has just baffled me though.

And £2.5m in reward money? There are missing kids ads that have been on the wall of my local Budgens for over 12 months, and I've not seen Richard Branson and David Beckham speak up for them.
(songsforeveryone, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:59, archived)
# Now that was funny.
See, fine line.

It's why I don't attempt.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:49, archived)
# There is no line
(I helped save b3ta! Hamster Trippin' aka Mr. Titts, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:51, archived)
# There are all sorts of lines
between love and hate, genius/madness and especially funny and not funny.

I agree there's probably not a line between acceptable subjects for humour and unacceptable subjects for humour though.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:55, archived)
# I think there is.
But I'm being very unreasonable today.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:55, archived)
# He's probably getting mixed up with spoons.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:59, archived)
# Yes, I was trying to be all zen, an' shit :)
whilst making a semi-serious point
(I helped save b3ta! Hamster Trippin' aka Mr. Titts, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:02, archived)
# Over the line!
Bullshit, Walter. Mark it 8, Dude.
Smokey, this is not 'Nam. This is bowling. There are rules.
(I helped save b3ta! Hamster Trippin' aka Mr. Titts, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:59, archived)
# I wouldn't argue with him
He's massive!

Jesus cracks me up.
(I helped save b3ta! Captain Wow currently being a cunt in Infamous, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:03, archived)
# Don't fuck with the Jesus, baby!
Love that film :D
(I helped save b3ta! Hamster Trippin' aka Mr. Titts, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:10, archived)
# Pfffft
*clicks*

more of this please
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:43, archived)
# Teehee.. Reminds me of the Unflustered Parents sketch on Jam...
www.youtube.com/watch?v=jLBtO6diixU
(I helped save b3ta! nel Roland Rat and Kevvviiinnnnn, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:48, archived)
# Pfffft
not seen that for ages

top stuff
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:54, archived)
# Ah, see
Now THAT was funny. It was finely crafted humour.
(I helped save b3ta! Afinkawan Yes I can hear you Clem Fandango, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:57, archived)
# hmm contraversial
on one hand you are right to mock the clearly inferior parental skills and seeming total lack of surprise of that couple, on the other hand the fate of 'Schrodinger's Maddie' as I like to refer to her, is a bit of a touchy subject for some who'd rather not think about the possible treatment of said infant.

Anyway have a woo, because in a about 2 weeks the media will have stoppped caring and the collective social conscious will deem it fair game.
(Absynth&Cheese Have you tasted my Jesus, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:51, archived)
# 'Schrodinger's Maddie'

Pffffffffftttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttt!!!!

*tea flies everywhere*

Arf!
(I helped save b3ta! Thor_sonofodin has done things, terrible things on, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:59, archived)
# great phrase
(I helped save b3ta! emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 17 May 2007, 16:19, archived)
# sick
but true.
(get on with it Über alles in der Welt, Thu 17 May 2007, 15:51, archived)
# hehe
The scary thing though is that whilst everyone now says "I would never have left my child asleep for 30 mins!! What idiots! It's their own fault!", I bet millions of people do it and have done it before but obviously won't own up now.

Still... hopefully it won't happen again.
(petebaldwin, Fri 18 May 2007, 2:54, archived)