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This is a link post I wonder if Francis Maude will deign to comment on this?
Yes, it's another fuck-me-this-government-are-all-bunch-of-fucking-cunts link.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:14, Reply)
This is a normal post Woman ignores common sense and unfortunately burns herself horribly
I've been reading about this and how many people are blaming the government. Don't people feel that they take responsibilities for their own stupid actions anymore?
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:21, Reply)
This is a normal post +1
Fuck all to do with the government.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:22, Reply)
This is a normal post Apart from
Apart from the fact that it was a government minister that advised her to store petrol in her house
 (banizdaymov A wig and a lager, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:28, Reply)
This is a normal post When did they say that then?

(I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:31, Reply)
This is a normal post Earlier this week
www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-17545258

"The government made a mistake in advising people to store petrol in jerrycans at home to prepare for a possible strike by fuel tanker drivers, a transport minister has said"

No shit, Sherlock!
 (banizdaymov A wig and a lager, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Although if you read that article you have linked to
you will find it says, very clearly, 'in your garage'.

It also was a statement which said 'do not panic, beyond topping up your tank and maybe having the jerrycan in your garage (I always have a jerrycan in the garage)' so the misreporting of it is far more to blame.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)
This is a normal post So your position is
that this woman would have been fucking about with petrol in her kitchen in the absence of this advice?
 (banizdaymov A wig and a lager, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:38, Reply)
This is a normal post If those creatures hadn't have died millions of years ago and been turned into oil, she would have never got burned
Fucking irresponsible cunts
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:39, Reply)
This is a normal post
b3ta.com/links/772686
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)
This is a normal post OK
so I'll grant that the advice said "garage" not house - fair enough. But there's a reason why the fire service criticised Maude for his advice: it's because shit like this happens, because people are morons, as evidenced by them fucking about with petrol in their kitchens with the bleeding oven on. Claiming that somehow this incident is entirely unconnected to government advice about stockpiling petrol is just daft.
 (banizdaymov A wig and a lager, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Of course it's not unconnected
But it's not their fault either. Morons are morons and need to learn by their actions rather than being fucking spoon-fed and wrapped up in cotton wool everywhere. "The contents of this cup are HOT" "These peanuts contain nuts". Severe scalding and a face like a ball of dough will soon show you what's what.
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:03, Reply)
This is a normal post You could argue as.......
the government treat us like a bunch of fucktards, they should think about making silly statements, or at least run it by the relevant (or 'know what the fuck they are talking about') authorities first. ;)
 (Spin Its a thing., Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:55, Reply)
This is a normal post "at home" is slightly different to "in her house".
I've got petrol at home (for my lawnmower) and it's in a proper container in the garage.
 (I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)
This is a normal post I am sorry,
if that is true I will withdraw my comment.

But it isn't, is it? You just made it up.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Care to withdraw your comment then?
See link above
 (banizdaymov A wig and a lager, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Q. Are you
A) A troll
B) a fucking idiot?
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:37, Reply)
This is a normal post I'll have a "B", Bob.

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:53, Reply)
This is a normal post No they didn't advise people to store petrol in their house
They also certainly didn't advise people to decant petrol in their kitchen next to the cooker and the pilot light

Don't get me wrong, I'm no fan and the whole petrol panic buy thing is a fucking disgrace, but let's get some perspective
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)
This is a normal post Dude
If she hadn't been told to store petrol in her house then she wouldn't have been fucking about with it in the kitchen!
 (banizdaymov A wig and a lager, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)
This is a normal post It was an advice given, "dude", not an instruction.
And again, with the "told to store petrol in her house" thing.
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Okay,
Let's have a new rule. Until you can find the quote where a government minister said to store it in her house, stop saying it happened.

K?

K.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)
This is a normal post
So presumably you took the advice yourself and filled your spare bedroom up with 400 gallons of unleaded?
 (Jimmers, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:54, Reply)
This is a normal post No-one else managed to fucking burn themselves!

(I helped save b3ta! Extinct Jesus Dossier "...I think it counteracts Hitler's magic...", Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:32, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh god, I agree completely.
Sadly, he must realise that there ARE many people in this country with chuff-all common sense; so suggesting decanting petrol into billycans is just retarded.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:33, Reply)
This is a normal post No,
storing fuel in a Jerrycan is fine.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:37, Reply)
This is a normal post On reflection, if I'd've anticipated this shitstorm just by posting this bbc story then I'd've posted a dog video.
You're right, he DIDN'T suggest that people decant petrol in their kitchens, but I do believe his comments were massively irresponsible. This country is populated by idiots. I'm amazed this woman has managed to survive to her 40s.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:46, Reply)
This is a normal post That was very irresponsible of you.


;)
 (I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:49, Reply)
This is a normal post tbh, I am regretting posting this link,
almost as much as some of the late-night, drunken internetting I used to do.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:53, Reply)
This is a normal post Put the kettle on.
*passes biscuits*
 (I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:59, Reply)
This is a normal post *remains tight-lipped*
*has trouble eating biscuits*
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:05, Reply)
This is a normal post This is no shit-storm
This is fucking brilliant

/links at it's best surely?
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:05, Reply)
This is a normal post even more irresponsible
is that fact that he suggested we store large quantities of petrol in our kitchen
 (I helped save b3ta! frox, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:57, Reply)
This is a normal post Unfortunately I think
that Elf & Safety are retarding genetic evolution as dumb people aren't removing themselves from the pool
 (skintagain, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:38, Reply)
This is a normal post ...not just that-
dumb people aren't known for their responsible attitude to contraception.
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:52, Reply)
This is a normal post I read something about taxi drivers filling up wheelie bins with petrol
and being surprised when the bottoms melted and leaked. Might be a crock though, but I wouldn't be surprised
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:38, Reply)
This is a normal post Happened 12 years ago in the fuel crisis. Melty bins all round. Someone also got stopped from trying to fill up a water butt in the back of their car.
Some people are just fucking stupid. Why on earth would you need to listen to the government for advice constantly? Read a newspaper, take sensible precautions based on your personal needs. It's not rocket science.

If some thick bint can't see the dangers in decanting flammable liquids into unsuitable containers next to a lit oven it's hardly the responsibility of anyone else but herself.

What is truly terrifying is how someone so stupid managed to get a driving license in the first place.
 (I helped save b3ta! Draconacticus Reject shampoo. Demand real poo!, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:41, Reply)
This is a normal post You're right
I distinctly remember him telling us all to decant petrol in open containers in our kitchens, while the stove is on.
 (I helped save b3ta! evil_andy Stick stick stick stick sticky sticky stick stick, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:23, Reply)
This is a normal post The government have really done their best to appeal to
the pasty-eating driver this week, I must say.

Yes, this woman is a fuckwit. But there's a lot of fuckwits in the UK, and the government doling out this type of advice only encourages them to do stupid shit.
 (I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)
This is a normal post Oh do fuck off.

(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:27, Reply)
This is a normal post Good morning Pedantichrist! :D
I'm in no way saying the government is responsible for this woman being thick, but they certainly haven't helped the situation, that's all.
 (I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:29, Reply)
This is a normal post They just said 'Don't worry too much about a strike, just keep your car topped up'
they did not say keep petrol in your fucking kitchen.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:34, Reply)
This is a normal post Francis Maude also said
motorists should store "maybe a little bit in the garage as well in a jerrycan". That was enough to set the idiots off, unfortunately.
 (I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:36, Reply)
This is a normal post Well, the reporting of it was - I struggled to find anyone reporting it in context at all./
Mr Maude had been trying to warn against a mad rush to the pumps just as garages in London were starting to ration supplies. He said: “As and when it makes sense, a bit of extra fuel in a jerry can is a sensible precaution to take.”

He did not say it in the context reported at all.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)
This is a normal post My grandmother read that advice and she drank 3 litres of petrol
I can't believe the government would be so irresponsible
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:41, Reply)
This is a normal post Bingo!

(I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:42, Reply)
This is a normal post The fact that people are queueing round the block for petrol
vindicates the "fuckwit" comment
 (I helped save b3ta! shitkicker, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:40, Reply)
This is a normal post It's a nightmare.
Some of us NEED petrol. So we have to queue.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:42, Reply)
This is a normal post ^This^
I've avoided forecourts like the plague this week, but will now have to join the queue of fucktards just to get my usual £20 worth of diesel.

I'm going to feel embarrassed
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:44, Reply)
This is a normal post ^^ this - in spades!

(I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:45, Reply)
This is a normal post This is why I'm glad I don't drive
although it will impact me in other ways I suppose
 (I helped save b3ta! Finite "Aardvark sorted out my shit!" on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:49, Reply)
This is a normal post There's a traffic jam near my house because of the fucktards panic buying fuel
There's not even a date set for a strike yet.

Also, the government has missed a trick here: Instead of getting everyone all worked up, why the juddering fuck don't they advise people to conserve fuel by encouraging them to walk/cycle/use public transport or car share?
So much for "We're all in this together" crap, the message they've incredibly successfully promulgated here is "Everyone for themselves". Fucking stupid cunts.
 (I helped save b3ta! P-MONKE We're all fucked, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:53, Reply)
This is a normal post ^ this, decanted next to the lit cooker
God knows what would happen if there was a real disaster in the UK. Probably a quick television speech and a "goodbye - and good luck everyone!" before climbing into their escape pods.
 (I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:55, Reply)
This is a normal post Actually,
it's a conspiracy.

The government is in the pay of the oil companies and they needed to boost their profits before the end of the tax year.

It also boosts tax receipts in the short term thus helping out George Osborne.

*discuss*
 (I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:56, Reply)
This is a normal post I tweeted precisely this
last night.

I agree.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:58, Reply)
This is a normal post I did think about this
When in the employ of the civil service, we absolutely did not sometimes sign off on contracts before completion at the end of the financial year, thereby ensuring the same level of funding the following year.
 (I helped save b3ta! P-MONKE We're all fucked, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:01, Reply)
This is a normal post Breaking troublesome unions did wonders for the tories in the 80s.
Notice how keen they were that Labour should condemn the strike before it's even happened. They're polarising the debate.
 (benito vaselini no not that one, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:09, Reply)
This is a normal post Quite true.

(I helped save b3ta! Blackdogmanguitar is out with Fat Larry's Jazz Band on, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:13, Reply)
This is a normal post oh god this
I was running on fumes, but finally got paid and had to join the queuing masses. Felt like I was one of them. I was at Morrisons at 9.30pm last night and the queues were still stretching back to the highway.

I guess the problem is in the next couple of weeks people will have holidays booked and are just making sure they're filled up in case they can't get to where they're going. The Beeb haven't helped by dispatching reporters to dozens of busy filling stations all over the place and reported on it every fifteen minutes.
 (I helped save b3ta! h3donist tryin' to play me out as if my name is Sega.., Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:55, Reply)
This is a normal post I had to queue last night
everyone else but me is a fuckwit, naturally
 (I helped save b3ta! shitkicker, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:50, Reply)
This is a normal post The cooker was on
The cooker was on

*despairs*
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:24, Reply)
This is a normal post ^ O_o

(I helped save b3ta! Michael Ellis contributes nothing, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:44, Reply)
This is a normal post Pity she's already got a daughter otherwise that would be Darwin Award material.

(I helped save b3ta! barryheadwound Mul-ti-pass? Multipass!, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 11:55, Reply)
This is a normal post
Interesting to see how the definition of "government" changes as time goes by.

It's now apparently required to be an omnipotent guardian angel to stand over us and take responsibility for every single decision we make, and to take the blame for the kind of stupidity for which you'd chastise a potato.

If you're the kind of person who needed the suffix on Maude's statement "..and please remember not to set fire to yourself", then it's pretty hard to feel any sympathy.
 (Jimmers, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:02, Reply)
This is a normal post Its good though
Because we're not responsible for anything anymore now the omnipotent guardian angels are in charge. I can set fire to myself and because no one told me not to its not my fault and I can be in The Sun looking all burned, serious and aggrieved. And then get money. Woohoo!

Pfft. "Chastise a potato".
 (I helped save b3ta! Throat And Ice Pie I see dem tatties dere., Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:30, Reply)
This is a normal post Stupid is
As stupid does.
 (I helped save b3ta! Mster Johnny Ekstrom, now that's a name, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:09, Reply)
This is a normal post The daily mash had a good go at this
www.thedailymash.co.uk/politics/politics-headlines/government-right-about-fuel-shortage-201203295075/
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:17, Reply)
This is a normal post Ha ha! I liked this one too:
www.thedailymash.co.uk/index.php?Itemid=81&id=5072&option=com_content&task=view
 (I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:50, Reply)
This is a normal post Stupid bint shouldn't be allowed to drive in the first place.
If you don't know that petrol is flammable (or inflammable can never define the two)then it's probably best you don't get to be in control of a tonne or so of metal going and 70mph.

I don't like the tories same as the next person but if they had advised people stock up on water for the upcoming shortage some prat would have drowned themselves.

And what part of the advise was bad?

If you rely of petrol, there's a possible shortage coming up and have the means to store it safely why wouldn't you?

Storing petrol in a garage is something anyone with a petrol lawnmower has to do anyway.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:35, Reply)
This is a normal post This is what happens
when people listen to a fucking Tory nonce like Maude
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:40, Reply)
This is a normal post Nonce? Francis Maude fucks kids?

(I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:44, Reply)
This is a normal post That has to be libel.
Really.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 14:43, Reply)
This is a normal post sexylibel

(I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 15:10, Reply)
This is a normal post As the thread starter you'll be held responsible too
He would never have stated categorically that Francis Maude(MP) likes to stick his willy in young kids if you hadn't given him the optionality.
 (I helped save b3ta! Cerebus Sticky! Sticky! Stick! Stick!, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 15:54, Reply)
This is a normal post I take full responsibility
he can fly out here and try to sue me :)

the big nonce
 (Ol' Ginger Bastard a role model for the children, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 17:54, Reply)
This is a normal post Yes it's all the Tories' fault that some people have no common sense

(I helped save b3ta! pixel_fucker is going to need a bigger brush, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 12:56, Reply)
This is a normal post I love this thread.

(I helped save b3ta! skeltonator Needs some new daps., Fri 30 Mar 2012, 13:17, Reply)
This is a normal post You monster

(I helped save b3ta! Tab Hunter Make this useless process end and so, begin again, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 13:25, Reply)
This is a normal post
www.b3ta.com/links/772735
 (I helped save b3ta! TownsendsPublisher is all gravy baby, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 15:45, Reply)
This is a normal post I see a clear link between gov behaviour and this incident but it's not the topping up jerry cans stuff.
It's that the Gov created a fuel panic that was utterly unnecessary as yes there is a dispute but there is no current strike, and there won't be strike until one is announced and even then the Union will have to give 7 days notice.

So suggesting it would be prudent to buy extra fuel was utterly unnecessary. And the result is people have panic bought, some have run out of fuel - including this woman's daughter who then attempted to borrow some from her mum and the accident took place.

As I see it the Gov were happy to create a flap to distract attention from the extremely serious funding allegations of the Tory party last weekend, and it's had utterly tragic and unpredictable consequences.
 (I helped save b3ta! rob, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 13:27, Reply)
This is a normal post ^pretty much this

(I helped save b3ta! wheresthefish Partly filled with wrong, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 13:35, Reply)
This is a normal post No, it was the reporting.
Basically his message was 'don't panic buy, no need, calm down - keeping your tank full or maybe having some in the garage, yes, panic buying, no' and the papers / bbc / etc all just went with the out-of context soundbite.
 (I helped save b3ta! LordManley twitter.com/LordManley, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 14:44, Reply)
This is a normal post This

(I helped save b3ta! Wasp Box like a nervous random stranger at a glory hole, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 15:03, Reply)
This is a normal post I have to agree with this
stupid as it was to decant petrol in a kitchen near a naked flame - the situation would never have arose if the Government hadn't planted the seeds of a potential Petrol Crisis in people's head.
 (I helped save b3ta! maiden is filmed before a live studio audience, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 18:00, Reply)
This is a normal post No it's god's fault for creating the earth in the first place
If he hadn't have done that, then created the dinosaurs, then they wouldn't have turned into fossil fuels over millions of years and then there wouldn't even BE any petrol to burn this womans' house down.
 (I helped save b3ta! pixel_fucker is going to need a bigger brush, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 18:41, Reply)
This is a normal post It's the UNITE Union's fault
and also the lorry drivers' fault. All lorry drivers and UNITE members should feel personally responsible for the injuries of this poor woman. Union members, lorry drivers, I HOPE YOU ARE PROUD OF YOURSELVES, YOU MURDERERS.

*EDIT* I just listened to Diana Holland from UNITE on Radio 4 squirming about trying to avoid responsibility for trying to murder this woman. What I didn't realise is that she's also treasurer of the labour party! So it's fucking Milliband's fault as well.

I HOPE YOU'RE HAPPY WITH THIS TRAGIC MESS MILLBAND! OR SHOULD I CALL YOU MURDERBAND?
 (I helped save b3ta! crab_bloke), Fri 30 Mar 2012, 13:34, Reply)
This is a normal post I broke the dam!
www.youtube.com/watch?v=AiPUjGNTi24
 (I helped save b3ta! Mster Johnny Ekstrom, now that's a name, Fri 30 Mar 2012, 13:40, Reply)