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This is a question When Animals Attack

I once witnessed my best friend savaged near to death by a flock of rampant killer sheep.

It's a kill-or-be-killed world out there and poor Steve Irwin never made it back alive. Tell us your tales of survival.

(, Thu 24 Apr 2008, 14:45)
Pages: Latest, 27, 26, 25, 24, 23, ... 1

This question is now closed.

the stories
actually related to this weeks QOTW finished at around page 19.

since then it has been loads of

LAST!
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 22:36, Reply)
C'mon b3ta
I'm on my own time now.
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 22:22, Reply)
Been away a while
but felt I should tell you my lovely, lovely rabbit, Arthur, put me in hospital.

The little bugger got behind the fridge and nibbled cables. I rescued him and accidentally touched a live wire.

I blew ten feet across the kitchen, hit a wall and was carted off by paramedics.

I adore him though.

And at least he's not a fucking kitten. They fucking suck. And are a cliche.
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 22:00, 2 replies)
Just What. In the name of yellow rubbery fuck
Is going on here?

Some of the most amusing and entertaining posters (myself not included as all I do is dribble a lot) are throwing their teddies out of the pram. Also, everyone else is getting their collective knickers scrunched.

Fucking sort it out MODs.

This does nothing for the site. The QOTW is descending into dogshite, and you are doing Jack Shit about it. Get a frigging grip.

(Sir)
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 21:49, Reply)
Bull.Fence.Puberty.......
Hmmkay, picture this. A lovely summers day on the farm and what does the (much younger) swampling like than to go and round up the cows for the evening milking.So far so good. What swampling is'nt told is that there's a fucking bull no less amongst the herd of cows BUT it's not easy to tell when your'e sitting on a wall o.k.? So down hops I to split the cows into 2 lines for the milking machine when the fucking groound only explodes with the sound of big poxy BULLS HOOVES heading in my direction :(( Did I mention the puberty at the start?
Generally it involves a lot of growth both up and down.... has anyone here tried to jump between the the horizontal bars of a farm gate at highish speed...GOD THE FUCKING PAIN! Oh hell's bell's did I check in future.....
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 21:39, Reply)
Dog Ass Assault.
The family dog of the D clan is a Bitsa of advanced years and placid temprament. In thirteen or so years he's never so much as looked at me funny.
His bottom is a different story. His bottom hates everybody and everything and wants us all to die screaming.
Take a tramp. Feed him nothing but sprouts and Campbells meatballs for a month. Then take off his underpants and feed them to a goat. Then feed the goat to a dog along with a bucketful of beansprouts and hate.
Now try to imagine this wafting under your nose with no warning whatsoever.
Even the dog tries to run away from the stench. Which means he just drags it around the room.
I love my dog. My dog loves me. His arse, however, makes me want to pull my own nose off.
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 19:52, Reply)
Uhhh
New QOTW?
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 19:39, 2 replies)
A late entry
Way back in the mists of time, I went to stay with a cousin.

He lived in the middle of some woods, and we went out exploring, and generally having fun.

One day we were wandering through the trees, when we came across a manky old football, half buried in some leaves.

He, being a few years older than me, realised what it was, and dared me to kick it as far as I could. So, young Kaol ran up to it, and gave it a mighty kick.

But... My foot went straight through it.

Bees started coming out.

Bees started chasing us.

I don't think I've ever run as fast as that...

Due to karmic balance, I didn't get stung once, but my cousin, the instigator, had to go to hospital.
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 18:56, Reply)
My sister
Was taking the piss out of my new hairdo yesterday.

and my cat walked up to her scratched her leg up a bit before biting her ankle and then coming to sit next to me looking smug us a mofo

I was so impressed I gave her some chicken as a treat

My wee sis is now scared to say anything about me in case of feline reprisal
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 18:34, Reply)
They are all at the dentist
being sedated.
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 18:31, Reply)
So, I've went for lunch (on a late shift), came back
And I see the QOTW still hasn't changed

And there's no more 'inane chatter' (to quote Humpty)

Looks like the whole 'the mods are only making us wait because people keep postin off-topic' theory doesn't hold much water after all
(, Thu 1 May 2008, 18:29, Reply)

This question is now closed.

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