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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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New thread for the win. Have you ever had your arse kicked?
Alt q: Worst fast food experience?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:31, 227 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I was at my nephews birthday party.
www.youtube.com/watch?v=S3dPXxPGbmM

That was my worst fast-food experience.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:33, Reply)
Ha I had it on mute! gutted Jeff I didn't hear the evilness!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:34, Reply)
And neither will anyone else now, what with your post.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:35, Reply)
Sorry!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:37, Reply)
Never mind.
I'll put it down to your drug intake.

You dealers are all nasty, evil types.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:38, Reply)
Ha I have found Jesus and am reformed.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:39, Reply)

r d
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:40, Reply)
I just spent a good minute
trying to work out how redormed was an insult!
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:43, Reply)
That'll be the DRUGS.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:44, Reply)
*Calls FRANK*
Hello? Jeff is bullying me.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:45, Reply)
I was just saved from a bad fast food experience
And no I've never had my arse kicked
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:41, Reply)
What did you have instead of your chicken?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:42, Reply)
nothing
I went to Tesco to buy something to assuage my hunger, and came out with black pepper, a pair of socks and cranberry juice.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:47, Reply)
well done
v healthy! esp the socks.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:48, Reply)
But I'm so hungry
that my eyes are like the dog in the Tinderbox story
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:49, Reply)
if you could be eating anything right now
what would it be?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:55, Reply)
Something with chicken
I'm hungry enough to be looking at Dominos with lustful eyes
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:56, Reply)
get a dominos with no cheese
job done!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:04, Reply)
And if you get it with no base and no other toppings it'll be the complete treat.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:06, Reply)
shush it you
thin and cripsy base, pile it with veggies and chicken, reasonably healthy snack compared to a traditional pizza!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:09, Reply)
Yeah, but you need the cheese to stick it all together
Otherwise, you've just got a warm salad sarnie, with no top.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:12, Reply)
I'll have zoop
and black pepper. Tomorrow lunch I'll have more soup. Tomorrow evening I will have dinner
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:14, Reply)
Socks?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:50, Reply)
I was unpacking
and realised that although I have loads of tights and lots of fluffy bedsocks that I neglected to bring more than two pairs of socks back with me, so I got some fill-in ones
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:52, Reply)
Yes.
/Bishop Brennan.
(I helped save b3ta! Dr Preference AjcuiVd289, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:41, Reply)
hahaha
Don't call me Len you little prick.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:42, Reply)
Don't call me Len ya little gobshite!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:42, Reply)
Depends what you mean by arse kicked
I have had someone kick my arse, and I have been hit, but I've never been beaten up if that makes sense? I have swung for other people on a couple of occasions though.

I used to work in McDonalds. I don't believe I need to elaborate...
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:43, Reply)
Do.
Were you Johnny no-stars?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:47, Reply)
Au contraire
I just hated it so much that I left after 6 months, which was twice as long as most people stuck it out.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:51, Reply)
I'm not a fan of McDonalds

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:02, Reply)
Neither am I
prefer Burger King on the infrequent occasions I feel like a burger and I can't go somewhere nice like Handmade Burger Co etc.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:13, Reply)
I'm not much of a fan of Burger King either.
Like you, I prefer to pay a bit more and have something a bit nicer.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:31, Reply)
Aye, my brother and I got jumped a few years back, had ten bells kicked out of us
Fucked me up for a while, had trouble sleeping, etc.

Alt Q: My friend decided it'd be funny to buy me Szechuan chicken, as I was pissed, and enormously hungry. I wolfed it down, before my face felt it was on fire.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:44, Reply)
That's my favourite dish from the Chinese. Although now I have steamed vegetables and egg fried rice!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:44, Reply)
I like Szechuan duck.
It's a favourite.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:47, Reply)
I'm a fan of the spicy crispy shredded beef

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:48, Reply)
I find the beef too sweet for my taste.
It's like eating sugared cow.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:51, Reply)
depends on the takeaway I think.
I'm lucky that my local one is good.

My local chippy is the fucking business too. Better than that cunt Rick Stein's one in Padstow.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:52, Reply)
thiiiiiiiiiiiiis

(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:51, Reply)
Never had that. I used to like crispy shredded beef too. Do you like Thai?

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:49, Reply)
man, I fucking love Thai food
so much it hurts sometimes
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:50, Reply)
i am always torn between a red thai curry and a pad thai
tough call. very tough.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:53, Reply)
last time I had thai* it was crab claws in roasted chilli sauce
it was fucking incredible

*aside from stuff I've cooked myself
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:55, Reply)
i don't eat crab
but roasted chilli sauce.... imagine that poured over pasta with some chunky courgettes, red onions and mixed peppers and roasted garlic mushrooms, with cubes of feta cheese and a hint of pesto

/orgasms
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:04, Reply)
is it that easy to make you come?
damn
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:08, Reply)
that wholly depends on who's trying, vipros...

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:22, Reply)
I say!
*drops monocle*
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:25, Reply)
never been in a fight
few people have tried to start, as the hardman types tend to do when they see a big bastard like me, but nothing has ever come of it.

good job really, because I'm a fucking coward. I'd be curious to know how I'd handle myself in a fight, but not enough to start one.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:47, Reply)
hey all
how is everyone???

never hit anyone/been hit apart from my younger brother.

fast food - i hardly ever have it (unless microwaving innocent veg pots count? only 300 cals, so poss not!) but last time i got a kebab the useless bastards forgot to put my falafel in the bread, so i basically walked all the way home in much excitement, only to find that i had a mountain of lettuce and garlic sauce. gah.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:48, Reply)
'ello moi luvver

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:49, Reply)
hello my little devon sexpot
how is your monday treating you?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:51, Reply)
not too bad ta
the working day went pretty quickly which was nice. Reasonably productive too.

How are you?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:53, Reply)
tired but happy
as my seminar to 50 scary surveyors went v well and they gave me bottles of wine to say thank you, phew!

how is the pool?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:58, Reply)
nice work!
pool is pretty good. Bit warmer than last week!
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:00, Reply)
Evening hot stuff.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:50, Reply)
hello you
my new flatmate is over the moon at all "the wire" dvd's, you made me v popular.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:52, Reply)
Woohoo
Happy days glad you are getting some use out of them.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:55, Reply)
i've not seen quite as many as i would like
due to stupid work but i intend to rectify this by spending an entire weekend on it in jan!!!!!!!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:57, Reply)
What a ker-falafel that must have been.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:52, Reply)
you owe me 2 new eyes
as i ripped the current ones out in disgust that they read that
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:54, Reply)
Sure.
What colour eyes would you like?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:55, Reply)
ooo ooo
pick red! red eyes are cool. I had red contacts once and people thought I was albino
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:56, Reply)
Albino eh?
Well, you can't say fairer than that!
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:57, Reply)
GET THE FUCK OUT.

(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:59, Reply)
What?
That was brilliant. I've been good all night.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:03, Reply)
Well, to give credit where credit is due...
you're still not getting any.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:15, Reply)
Well admit you smiled, and we'll leave it there.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:26, Reply)
Shan't.
you'll have to try harder than that to get a smirk out of me.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:33, Reply)
I don't want your tabs, geordie.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:44, Reply)
....I'm from the north west
not the north east.

Try again.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:45, Reply)
Well smirk doesn't sound like 'smoke' in another other regional accent.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:55, Reply)
dunno
what's the best colour for a girl to have?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:56, Reply)
Matching.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:58, Reply)
RED RED RED!

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:58, Reply)
hahahaaha
fucking goblins, man.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:08, Reply)
Green/hazel
like mine *smugs*
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:59, Reply)
green

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:59, Reply)
but they're green already!
i was thinking bright piercing blue.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:06, Reply)
what the hell is with all this green eyes thing?
do all OT girls except me have green eyes :(
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:08, Reply)
green are best
definitely
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:08, Reply)
are they now?
you need to stop telling me that you are all the things I look for in a woman
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:09, Reply)
you can see on my fb shots
if you can be arsed. i used to hate them because my stupid teacher in primary school said "all witches have green eyes. like rswipe." but i do get complimented on them, so i have come to accept them!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:21, Reply)
pfft count yourself lucky
in my primary school we read The Princess and Curdie in which the immensely ugly preternatural dog had green eyes with yellow flecks. Have a guess who got compared to it every lesson?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:24, Reply)
I recall being at primary school
and we were doing graphs or something, so everyone's eye colour was noted. People refused to accept that you could even get grey eyes, despite me wielding the evidence.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:27, Reply)
not green enough
I demand that you change them
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:24, Reply)
ha
it depends what i wear. if i am on the pull i usually wear something green, works like a charm.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:36, Reply)
I really, really don't like blue eyes on guys.
Apart from Cillian Murphy. Oh nom nom nom.

I like green eyes on anyone and brown on boys.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:09, Reply)
naa, grey is best on a guy

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:10, Reply)
I have grey eyes
and have been told they are sinister which is cool but unfortunate.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:11, Reply)
I also have grey eyes
as we have discussed before I think, and while they are quite unusual I don't think anyone has ever commented on them.

Motherfuckers.

I tell you, interesting eyes, surfing and playing the guitar do not get you the ladies.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:15, Reply)
Grey are nice.
Especially as it's quite unusual. But my preference is definitely for green/hazel.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:12, Reply)
I'm the same, but with brown eyes
I just don't like them. Blue eyes on the other hand...particularly if they are a bright, piercing blue *melts*
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:12, Reply)
I do love eyes.
Mine seem to be the go-to compliment if people want to compliment me. I'm alarmed as my splodge seems to have shrunk, I seem to rememer shouting at someone and trying to show them it and them not having any clue where it was or what I was doing.
I'm not drinking again.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:16, Reply)
Bahaha! You are a right drunken casualty sometimes.
Apparently green/hazel eyes are more prone to having splodges in, I have some but they're only little. And yeah, they're pretty much all I ever get complimented on too!
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:20, Reply)
My eyes are a bit weird
Greeny blue grey with yellowish circles around the pupil, with a brown splodge in the left one. Apparently exactly the same position as my dead grandfather's splodge, too.

I have done so many things I've regretted while drunk, I'm really not sure the pros outweigh the cons.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:21, Reply)
I don't often get shouty or argumental
when I've been OMGdrunk on rare occasions, the only casualty is me, I tend to giggle and fall over and break stuff (pint glasses, nose, clothes etc)
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:25, Reply)
Nose? Ouch.
Looking back on the things I've done, I'd want to take back about 80% of them. I have some great stories, but very little self-worth.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:27, Reply)
Haha, yeah
I did a comedy fall off the back of a bench whilst my - get this - MOTHER, SISTER AND BROTHER, who had gotten me in to that state, went to get pizza.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:32, Reply)
I'd say green
but I have an obvious bias. So go for grey
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:00, Reply)
blind

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:01, Reply)
fucking hell

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:48, Reply)
evening missus

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:53, Reply)
hola chica

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:54, Reply)
Not exactly.
I have beaten myself up rather spectacularly, like denting my tibia on a coffee table.

Alt: The salad naan Apples tried to feed me. I hate dressing on salad. Didn't help me when I started vomitting...
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:49, Reply)
these both sound like great stories.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:51, Reply)
My life is spectacular.

(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:05, Reply)
Why aren't you asleep?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:56, Reply)
Alright alright now, I'm in bed.
Seeing if b3ta's still alive before I doze off. Don't have to wake/get up til 1030, though. So might stay up til the am. Maybe.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:06, Reply)
Well if you're going to be all grumpy tomorrow, then don't come complaining to me.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:10, Reply)
I NEVER complain.
How dare you suggest I complain. It's not fair that you're picking on me in this way, it's so rude. Consider yourself ignored.
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:14, Reply)
:(

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:23, Reply)

♥
(I helped save b3ta! Lampito rise with the moon, go to bed with the sun, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:26, Reply)
*blushes*

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:33, Reply)
Not in real life
But I TOTALLY kicked the ass of a clarinet/flute duet bit in orchestra just now. I was sightreading and the only flute playing and everything.

bow down in awe
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:52, Reply)
What about LARPing?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:56, Reply)
I didn't want to bring that up again
of course I've been beaten up, there. Had my ass handed to be a number of times.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:57, Reply)
No, never.
Alt q: probably a kebab I had in Coventry. It was grim, just a warmed up pitta stuffed with mystery meat. No salad, sauces, garnish of any kind. Manky.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:53, Reply)
mystery meat?
naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaice.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:54, Reply)
Serves you right on two counts
1) being in Coventry
2) opting to buy meat you can SHAVE. Fuck's sake, there is nothing natural or normal about kebab meat.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 22:56, Reply)
i was going to say this
then felt bad for slagging off coventry.

you're totally right though.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:00, Reply)
There is no excuse for Coventry
none whatsoever.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:03, Reply)
this is true
"how many miles to coventry?
three-score mile and ten.
will i get there by candlelight?
yes - but don't come back again."
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:07, Reply)
More like -
Will I get there by candlelight?
Yes - but I wouldn't bother if I were you.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:10, Reply)
I feel I must defend the reputation of Coventry
I'm from Coventry and so is Pooflake!

OK, so not much of a defence but there's loads of good things about Coventry. There's....errm....give me a minute....Oh YEAH it's got....no that's somewhere else.


I'll think of something.
(Captain Placid 24/7 ball gags, brownie mix and clown porn, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 11:11, Reply)
I wasn't even drunk
just a bit bewildered. Coventry man ... *does thousand yard stare*
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:02, Reply)
i love a fucking donner me
its not hair love, its how you carve the meat
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:02, Reply)
heavens knows what you make of bacon

(I helped save b3ta! Sir Sand GOBLIN ^popular page dis, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:14, Reply)
I could make a hat, a brooch
or a pterodactyl
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:17, Reply)
bacon should be illegal
when i am queen/prime minister/dictator, it will be.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:19, Reply)
But why??

(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:23, Reply)
it smells and tastes like crispy salty death

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:34, Reply)
But that's part of its charm...
I love a bit of bacon every now and then, particularly in soup which is otherwise healthy.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:37, Reply)
I've never had a doner kebab.
Are they nice? They look horrid.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:04, Reply)
dont listen to food snobs
try stuff for yourself and see how you get on
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:06, Reply)
But they look horrible, which is why I've never had one.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:10, Reply)
you child

(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:15, Reply)
What? A doner kebab in pitta bread looks like a diseased clunge.
I wouldn't know if I should eat it, or give it to a gynecologist to examine.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:20, Reply)
mussels look like a bit like that too
and they are fucking lovely
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:22, Reply)
do you live on billy roll?

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:23, Reply)
What?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:36, Reply)
billy roll

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:41, Reply)
Fucking hell!
I've not seen that stuff for yeeeeears.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:44, Reply)
tasty slices of face

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:47, Reply)
why would anyone do that?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:50, Reply)
Because if you're 7 years old
it's great.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:51, Reply)
I think even at the age of 7
if I'd been greeted with that I'd have been paralyzed with terror
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:53, Reply)
I've never tried it.
Does it taste as bad as it looks?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:51, Reply)
it's just a kind of processed ham
if a doner scares you then something with a friendly face might work.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:54, Reply)
That really isn't a friendly face though, is it?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:56, Reply)
jesus you're fussy

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:58, Reply)
They are ridiculously nice after a few beers
in a "oh god I can feel my arteries clogging" kind of way
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:43, Reply)
they can be gorgeousness
but there are some shoddy merchants out there. Try and find one that does it's own bread and has a range of (identifiable) meats.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:07, Reply)
britain's fattest man on tv right now
he weighs 70stone and it costs £100k a year to care for him. er.........
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:16, Reply)
100k a year?
You're the only person I can think of who could possible afford to feed him!
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:22, Reply)
but how do these people afford it????

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:25, Reply)
They don't
taxpayer innit.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:26, Reply)
ah it just said
this tool got his ancient mother to take out a £10k mortgage to pay for his food

then house got repossessed
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:28, Reply)
WHAT?!
that awful shitcunt! I hope his own fat seeps in to his brain and gives him obesity CJD.
(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:30, Reply)
yeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeah
he is now crying about his poor survival prospects. he only has himself to blame. i think the fat has already gone to his brain.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:32, Reply)
Fuck me!
It's Jabba the Hutt.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:42, Reply)
i flicked over to family guy
did he survive the surgery?

his legs made me want to yak
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:44, Reply)
He hasn't had it yet.
Jesus. He is topless.

*Barfs*
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:46, Reply)
keep me posted

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:47, Reply)
He's now boo hooing because they're halving his £700 a week care allowance

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:53, Reply)

r k
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:54, Reply)
fuck me

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:55, Reply)
I'm not even watching it
and just from these comments I'm feeling better
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:56, Reply)
his legs are in.... folds, like giant folds of sweaty ham...

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:57, Reply)
He has leg scrotums

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:59, Reply)
I'm so glad I don't have a tv...

(berk, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:59, Reply)
It's sexy, like a binbag full of fat

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:03, Reply)
What have they just cut out of him?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:04, Reply)
They removed his leg scrotum
It looked like a bin full of flesh coloured jelly
(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:04, Reply)
And that weighed over a stone?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:05, Reply)
A stone and a half I think

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:06, Reply)
mmm ... sweaty ham

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:00, Reply)
Stand on me.
Unless you are some medical freak, there is no reason for ANYONE to be his size.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:00, Reply)
THE CAKES ARE DELICIOUS, YES

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:01, Reply)
What channel is it on? I'll tune in and make a sensible comment.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:28, Reply)
channel 4 i think

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:28, Reply)
Nope, I've always been cunning/cowardly enough never to get into fights.

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:26, Reply)
definitely not cowardly
cunts are tooled up and en masse nowadays. it ent like when my old man were younger

its bollocks
(I helped save b3ta! rosalicious i fucking love youve been framed, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:29, Reply)
Bloody Tory Youths, growing up here, stealing our dole money...

(I helped save b3ta! The Mock TurtIe ™ --- Thinks you are a cunt, on, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:32, Reply)
I've been woolled all over the place, had chunks pulled out of my hair, punched in the stomach and had the inside of my mouth scratched.
Got walloped right through infants and juniors.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:58, Reply)
Alright lar?
Were you at school with Barry Grant?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 10 Jan 2011, 23:59, Reply)
He was a poof compared to the kids I went to school with.
They knew how to do it.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:00, Reply)
Kids can be so cruel.
Have you got your own back on them all now, by laughing at them all when you read the local paper and you can see them all getting sent down?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:03, Reply)
Yep, she set them all up!
EDIT: Ah sweet, didn't realise it was my b3taday!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:06, Reply)
Happy candle day AA!

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:08, Reply)
HPCD AA

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:10, Reply)
Happiness is revenge, but I'm not arsed really.
Someone's always going get bullied, and let's face it, it was a dead cert it was going to be me. Believe it or not I spoke nice and always had a handkerchief and said things like "I love Simon & Garfunkel". Jesus, I'd have bullied me if I wasn't such a gobshite.
Some of them have gone the way you'd imagine, some of them have done alright for themselves. Meh. None of them are me, and none of them derive pleasure from life like I can.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:08, Reply)
Go Roota!
And you've got a cat.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:09, Reply)
Not just a cat Jeff, but Our Tigger!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:10, Reply)
Do you ever break up your day, when you've asked a few questions and say
'Lets go out to our Graham for a recap?'

'Will Tigger go for number 1, a shit in the litter tray? Or two, his/her water? Or 3! The nice tasty treat!'
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:13, Reply)
From now on I bloody well will!

(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:16, Reply)
Brilliant!
Does DJTP have 'the voice of Graham?'
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:18, Reply)
I'm sure if I asked him nicely and we turned the kitchen table on its side as the 'partition'...
Blimey, it would be like LWT in my flat!
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:20, Reply)
London Weekend Television!
3-2-1-tastic!

What was your favourite of the weekend shows when you were a child?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:22, Reply)
They tell me it was Seaside Special when I was a toddler.
I also liked Game for a Laugh and the Late Late Breakfast Show.
You?
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:26, Reply)
3-2-1 with Ted Rogers was always a favourite
Although I seem to recall a fondness for 'Game for a laugh' but it was the cop-shows 'back in the day' that I liked.

The Gentle Touch
CATS eyes
Dempsey and Makepeace

That sort of thing.

Beadle's About was always watched, I remember that.

I never liked Noel Edmonds. Why did you like him?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:29, Reply)
Oh you legend
The Gentle Touch
CATS eyes
Dempsey and Makepeace

They ruled.

And I dunno, Noel was BBC and everyone on BBC made me feel like I was in a gang and had friends.

Right, I'm off to sleep.
Byeeee.
(I helped save b3ta! Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:38, Reply)
Right I'm off
Off for soup and a DVD. Sleep well all!
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:09, Reply)
Sleep well Amberl.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:11, Reply)
I've been punched a few times, but I've never had my arse kicked properly
It's part of the job though, innit?
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:10, Reply)
Did the U2 crowd 'kick off' big style?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:22, Reply)
No. it's only ever happened when I've literally jumped in the middle of people squaring up to each othet
Apart from once, when a shining beacon of humanity just twatted me in the face after I told him to get out (he was barred and came in the pub when he knew it was me looking after it for the week). He's a proper cunt, and the last I heard, he had six months to live. Couldn't happen to a nicer bloke.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:45, Reply)
Rugby cunt?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:45, Reply)
That was the last time, yeah.
Happy b3day by the way.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:46, Reply)
Thank you!
What a cunt.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Jan 2011, 0:57, Reply)
Meh. I love my job.
It's just unfortunate that I have to deal with cunts sometimes.

Anyway, am off. Night.
(BelladonnaAnodyne Melissa's gonna wet herself, I swear..., Tue 11 Jan 2011, 1:03, Reply)

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