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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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National Service anyone?
I assume most here are either too old, or will be if and when it comes in.
www.publications.parliament.uk/pa/bills/cbill/2013-2014/0032/cbill_2013-20140032_en_2.htm#l1g1
To be fair, it isn't just marching up and down, being shouted at by some cunt, a la Lads' Army style, there is an element of choice.
Good, bad or indifferent?
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:14, 124 replies, latest was 11 years ago)
Good generally.
I think that everyone at 18 should spend a year working for the NHs.
(PsychoChomp, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:17, Reply)
If only to gain the knowledge 'never work for the NHS'

(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:01, Reply)
I'm the only member of my family who *hasn't* been in the army.
I don't take well to people shouting at me. Depending on my state of mind, I either start crying or shout back.

I would have been happy to do something less military when I was a student, though.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:18, Reply)
Girl.
Oh wait, you are...
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:21, Reply)
Against.
But not as against it as I would be if I was younger than 26.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:24, Reply)
How is this going to be funded, given these straitened times of austerity etc?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:26, Reply)
Bad idea.
Ask a soldier. Professional soldiers want to soldier, not babysit a bunch of lary chavs that aren't interested.

Having said that, we need some cannon fodder, and a lot of the colonies have been getting terribly uppity recently.
(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:26, Reply)
If they're bringing back anything, it should be the birch
and the Generation Game.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:26, Reply)
Its good, but its not right

(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:27, Reply)
Why couldn't Forsyth have nonced up some kids, eh?
It's not fair. We've lost Rolf, yet that stuttering cunt is still on the telly.
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:29, Reply)
Pop sensation 'Lemarr' was right all along, it seems.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:37, Reply)
There certainly isn't.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:38, Reply)
That's Catchphrase you twerp.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:35, Reply)
I can never get the conundrum bit on that.

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:37, Reply)
The Gold Run is worth the wait though

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:37, Reply)
Chutney Ferret. Put yourself on the Hotspot, please.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:38, Reply)
Who am I? I am a landlocked European principality etc

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:40, Reply)
I hated that show.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:41, Reply)
NEAUX WAIIIII
IT WERE B0$$
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:47, Reply)
Noel's House Party... Without Noel.

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:27, Reply)
Noel's House Party with Noel Fielding

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:29, Reply)
Noel's House Party with Helen Fielding.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:33, Reply)
Noel's Field Party at Helen's House

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:35, Reply)
Noel Fields Helen's Party House

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:42, Reply)
The thing that I've always wondered is...
How did they do that 'hidden camera' bit? This was the mid-90's; cameras were bigger and attached to an outside-broadcast van?

How come nobody was ever having a shit, or a wank?
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:30, Reply)
and those cunts on the Big breakfast who sent Cheggers round.
Fuck off, Cheggers.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:38, Reply)
I would be very upset if I'd been woken up by Cheggers knocking at my door.
Live on tv or otherwise.
(I helped save b3ta! Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:43, Reply)
Why the Generation Game?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:27, Reply)
Why not?

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:28, Reply)
Why not bring back the Clangers?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:29, Reply)
Why not indeed
Kids tv is wall to wall Japanese toy adverts these days

/old
(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:30, Reply)
^ Nonce

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:33, Reply)
:O

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:34, Reply)
Lacist

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:41, Reply)
Damn fine idea
Since they were knitted toys, extra employment opportunities for grannies making them.
(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:34, Reply)
I'd get single mothers, doing it.
Move them into disused army camps. Make them pay for their Godless sluttery.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:39, Reply)
Yeah cos I heard they ceremonially burned the puppets after each episode
Ensuring a constant stream of work for 'Nans' across the country
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:40, Reply)
MASSIVE CLANGER

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:36, Reply)
Combining corporal punishment and a popular game show could be good.
Baseball bat and Noel Edmonds.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:35, Reply)
Roy Walker and a crossbow

(I helped save b3ta! Two Hats 🎩🎩, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:36, Reply)
"Spankety Spank"

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:39, Reply)
Might put a bit of discipline into the otherwise delinquent youth.
Plus, Im past that age, so fuck it.
(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:27, Reply)
This looks like the best film ever made.
www.theguardian.com/film/2013/sep/10/one-chance-review-toronto
(PsychoChomp, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:27, Reply)
What could be better than the X factor than a film about the x factor

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:37, Reply)
Michael Le Vell has been found innocent.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:28, Reply)
I'm sure the subject will be completely dropped
and he will never hear any hint of suspicion about his character ever again.
(I helped save b3ta! b3th Not shit. Not mod., Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:29, Reply)
Particularly on b3ta.

(I helped save b3ta! Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:33, Reply)
I didn't know the Daily Mail was quite so blatant about running the government these days?

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:30, Reply)
If they can only make people called bill do it
I'm all for it
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:30, Reply)
Will there be buggery?

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:31, Reply)
YOU BETCHA

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:31, Reply)
Them I'm in!

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:33, Reply)
^public schoolboy

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:36, Reply)
^cotton traders shopper^

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:38, Reply)
^farts sound like a low whistle

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:40, Reply)
^ rubbish at jibes

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:42, Reply)
^ I just want to be an active part of this subthread

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:44, Reply)
^ Jibe talkin'

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:45, Reply)
^ You're telling me jibes

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:46, Reply)
^cut your jibe jaberrin, foo'

(localboy purveyor of pisspoor puns, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:50, Reply)
and out, and in and out and in.........FINISHED

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:37, Reply)
Shake it all about in your mums face

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:43, Reply)
Is it going to be enacted?

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:36, Reply)
If we got them all trained as Longbow men
the French would be shitting themselves
(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:39, Reply)
Do you want to buy a French pikestaff?
It's only been dropped once!!!
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:40, Reply)
more than usual

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:40, Reply)

usual Gonz
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:40, Reply)
Kroney, surely?

(I helped save b3ta! GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:42, Reply)
Well it's 50/50
One's French, the other's a gutswrong.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:45, Reply)
Not possible, they'd need Atlantic levels of effluent

(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:42, Reply)
I think the only one from here that'd be affected would be Barry
But he'd be kicked out within a week for 'accidentally' nicking the washing powder.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:44, Reply)
You're only 16 you'd definately have to do it
It's be great, you'd be the 'fat one'
(I helped save b3ta! Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:46, Reply)
I'm 25 now, and weigh the least I have done since I was 19.
Probably less than you, too.

In which case, shit off, you fat fuck.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:46, Reply)
yeah, you tell the popped collared lard arse

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:48, Reply)
YEAH THE FAT, BENT, SPASTIC

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:50, Reply)
How long/how many viewings of my flat without an offer before I drop the asking price, property types?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:45, Reply)
Ain't that the job of the estate agent?

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:45, Reply)
Well they'll tell me when they think that's necessary but I wondered what folks think would be long enough to start thinking this

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:46, Reply)
I really can't help you on this, I'm a bit busy doing research at "Which Tent"

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:49, Reply)
The A1 is *lovely* this time of year.
You'll be fine!!!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:49, Reply)
fuck that, the A30 has so much more to offer

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:51, Reply)
Well that's the magic of tent life - it's so flexible!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:53, Reply)
I'll gaz Rory maybe he has some tips

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:54, Reply)
And the original Yurtprick might have tips too.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:55, Reply)
How long has it been on for & how many viewings have there been?

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:50, Reply)
It's the damp patches on the carpet from Stunned last visit that is putting people off

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:51, Reply)
Carpets?
No thank you!!! I'm in the original floorboards 'cool' gang.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:52, Reply)
OAK 111!!!!1!1!1!!!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! hartley hare Just some prick who thinks it doesn't apply to him, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:54, Reply)
less than a fortnight and mebbe 10 viewings? Two more tonight and another on Saturday.
I'm not suggesting it's time now, and I am in no hurry to sell, but I've never sold before so I just wondered.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:52, Reply)
I'd give it another ten days, then have a chat with the agent; see if there are any common themes in terms of feedback from those who have viewed it.
'I couldn't live near all these blacks'.
'It stinks of piss'
'who the fuck are Electric Headfunk?'

etc.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:56, Reply)
These are already emerging:
1) short lease
2) ground floor

These seem to be the main issues.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:57, Reply)
what kind of a moron doesn't ask those questions before going round to see it?
god i hate people
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:58, Reply)
Female morons?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:00, Reply)
I don't see why ground floor would be a problem, but the lease length is understandable.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:58, Reply)
Yeah the ground floor thing has been raised by single female buyers who have 'security' concerns.
Lease, yes, I can't say I'm surprised.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:59, Reply)
Secretly, women like that WANT to be raped.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:00, Reply)
Not even secretly.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:01, Reply)
Bitches.
In other news I am interviewing a potential nanny for my daughter at 6pm.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:07, Reply)
But your ex doesn't work does she?
What do you need one for?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:10, Reply)
My ex is starting a three-year long course in a couple of weeks, Mon-Thurs mornings.
Not at my expense thankfully.
(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:11, Reply)
Oh that's alright then.
And actually, nice that you're being consulted.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:12, Reply)
I insisted.

(I helped save b3ta! Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:17, Reply)
You don't lose £56k in a year (on top of what she could account for) by sitting around doing fuck all.
No point in staking a claim on a man and then digging his gold if you're not going to spend that gold.
(I helped save b3ta! G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩&#128, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:17, Reply)
Right on, sister!

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:19, Reply)
You should get lazy people in
They like the lack of stairs
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:12, Reply)
Why'd ya think I bought it?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:13, Reply)
I lived on the ground floor in a flat and no-one raped ME
It's insulting is what it is
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:14, Reply)
Me neither,
I ended up having to rape myself in the end.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:15, Reply)
Dirty job, dude.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:32, Reply)
Trickier than you'd think, too.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:33, Reply)
If anyone etc etc

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:34, Reply)
Also how can single females afford to buy?
I assume they made off with their husbands money.
(I helped save b3ta! Theoban What of it, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:14, Reply)
The slatterns.
I suspect they are all courtesans.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:15, Reply)
Fucking Ground Floor
what did these cunts think when they went to look at a fucking Ground Floor flat.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:58, Reply)
Stupid women GOD I HATE THEM

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:00, Reply)
What she said.
with the amount of viewings its not like it is sitting dormant so if the price was too high then you wouldn't get anyone through.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 16:57, Reply)
Yeah I'm not concerned yet,
also prices round there are going up by 0.75% a month anyway, so in time it'll be a bargain (!)
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:00, Reply)
Perfect journey home!,

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:28, Reply)
No way, back already?
Mental!
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:29, Reply)
Absolutely perfect

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:30, Reply)
How short is the lease?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:45, Reply)
6 hours.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:47, Reply)
66 years
I've a statement guaranteeing a share of freehold for £25k though
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:54, Reply)
I had a beer.
And in reference to the previous thread:
Yes, Bobo the saddest clown in town *can* have a beer.
Yes, I have got on the Javelin.
No, it's not a spam javelin.
Stunned poster's implication of homosexual behaviour was far more elegant of the two hilarious references.
(I helped save b3ta! MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 10 Sep 2013, 17:48, Reply)

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