Parental threats
Did your parents ever make threats when you were a kid eg washing mouth out with soap, and did they ever carry them out?


Alt: What are your favorite bands?
(Stibbins, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:31, 213 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Hold on, who are you?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:32, Reply)

thats Stibbins tangs
new tab required /philcollinsexcelconceptalbumzzzzz
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:34, Reply)

This changes EVERYTHING Rayg

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)

Alright "Climie"

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)

Alright Fisher

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:37, Reply)

thats mr flathead to you

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)

Woah....

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:32, Reply)

too fucken right they did, cunts taught me a fucken lesson about having a potty mouth
alt: wrist
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:33, Reply)

ot ur
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:47, Reply)

purty mouth?
you flirting with reg?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)

*banjoes*

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:56, Reply)

Yes. They did. They were ALWAYS carried out.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:33, Reply)

so the wind changed eh?

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:34, Reply)

Highlights include
Being smacked to shit with a large metal ladle - she got bored of breaking wooden spoons on me (I was 4 when the metal ones started). I was often kept off school until the bruises had faded.

Having a glass milk bottle smashed in to the back of my head (aged 12).

Scrubbing my skin with a pummice stone until all the skin was gone (still have the scar) as I'd written on my arm in biro.

Need I go on?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:37, Reply)

Yeah go on, I'm almost there

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)

Yes.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)

Nose broken (aged 11).
Concussion (aged 8) from a wooden clog thrown at me.
Ribs repeatedly cracked from about 9 years old onwards.
I had to drink a small glassful of Fairy Liquid on more than one occasion.
My father also used to enjoy regularly spitting in my face (not cum thankfully). This started before I started school. Not sure exactly when.
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)

Good for you for being able to say.

( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:53, Reply)

Fuck, that's pretty horrific mate.
Still, at least you are a decent, well rounded, calm individual with no obvious personality problems now eh?
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:40, Reply)

it's a click from me!

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:06, Reply)

Sounds like a wonderful childhood.
Do you think it's affected you in any way?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)

Not in the slightest!

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:44, Reply)

well if it makes you feel better by all means
i ent saying this is the ideal forum but fuckers get their vinegars all sorts of ways
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)

And what's your relationship like these days?

( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)

Nonexistent. Not been in touch for many years.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:44, Reply)

And your father?

( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:46, Reply)

Same.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:46, Reply)

Played for and got.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:46, Reply)

Oh, I say Athers. He played that awfully late but he's got it away to the third man bondary.

( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:48, Reply)

I plotted revenge on my dadfor what he did to my mum and sister for many many years
and the cunt spoiled it by killing himself.
( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)

Well at least you avoided a prison sentence as a result.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:52, Reply)

Maybe you mind-gamed him into doing it.
Take the credit.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:55, Reply)

Is it true that you got kicked & punched to death by your dad?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:35, Reply)

my ex's mum used to tell him she was taking him back to the orphanage to swap him for a better little boy
he said she had him packing his suitcase once, he was in floods.

my dad used to get so cross when i refused to eat expensive meat that he would hold my nose until i had to open my mouth to breathe and then shove it in. it's no wonder i've been veggie since i was 13. i threatened to report him to the nspcc. he laughed and said, cruel dad forces daughter to eat filet steak, off you go...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:34, Reply)

you've got expensive meat all over your face.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:35, Reply)

nah
you're definitely tesco value
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)

i don know where to begin tbh

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:35, Reply)

hoorah
i have silenced quentin
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)

*paging sigmund sputnik*

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:38, Reply)

Just think, if they'd swapped him
you might still be together.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)

he was an idiot to believe it
she was the only person on the planet with a nose as big as his
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:47, Reply)

Who you calling Bignose?
Bignose!
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:58, Reply)

Whenever my kids tell me that I'm mean or they don't like me I tell them I'm going out to find them a better daddy
Currently it always works and they back down. However in a few years they will be packing my bag for me.
( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:45, Reply)

They didn't make threats very often, but when they did they carried them out.
A couple of wallops with Dad's belt was enough to stop me testing boundaries.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)

Did he get his colleagues to deny it ever happened?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:36, Reply)

It sounds rough, but he used to hate it, according to my mum.
More often than not it was some openhand slaps and being sent to bed without supper. He'd sneak up a few hours later with a jam sandwich. He was alright, my dad.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)

except that he produced you
which is the biggest crime committed EVER.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)

It's definitely a crime against other men. Poor bastards have to compete against me to get the young, hot ones.
As you can see, they mostly have to put up with the wrinklies.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)

you forget that i know you
and i know what you look like.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:44, Reply)

No, I don't.

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:45, Reply)

OH
time to get those new gigs tested, eh speccy?
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:46, Reply)

*shrug* I do pretty well, ain't had a wrinkly yet.

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)

God that must be so boring

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)

The problem, Tangles, is that they've got nothing to talk about.
If only I could find one who'd bang on and on about how many friends they've got.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:52, Reply)

ooooh, oooooooh, red napkins or green napkins at the christmas party?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:53, Reply)

^Making assumptions about somebody's intellect based on their looks = shallow

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:15, Reply)

who does that?
you base it on their job and how many braincells it requires.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:30, Reply)

Unfortunately this is exactly the sort of spitefulness I'd expect from somebody
well on their way towards dying a spinster's death surrounded by knitting and cats.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:32, Reply)

unfortunately someone who is only capable of choosing venues for the office party
is all i would expect from someone who chooses her based on her age and looks
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:38, Reply)

so long as your own criteria are met
don't worry about how they come across to everyone else
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:52, Reply)

I don't. I figure if somebody's judging somebody else based on their own insecurities,
that person's probably not worth bothering myself with.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:53, Reply)

which is how i feel about someone who only ever talks about how their girlfriend looks

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:54, Reply)

I rarely mention my girlfriend unless I'm talking about something we've done together.
Sure there are implications based on whatever I've said about not liking older women, but that's only because wrinkles are gross.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:56, Reply)

this goes for men too
along with neckbeards and soggy cocks that can't get as hard as they did in your 20's
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:31, Reply)

surrendeur monkey.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)

Got my mouth washed out with soap a few times,
Pushed my luck with the "if you don't stop that this instant, you'll have a red ear" and the odd "when your father gets home and sees this, the back of your legs will get tanned."
. I don't think it's affected me at all.

Alt: tough one, but the band I come back to time and time again is Clutch.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:39, Reply)

Well, there was one permanent effect:
a ea +hai
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:41, Reply)

It is a constant shame

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)

My mum kept telling me that if I kept pushing out farts 'One of these day's you'll have an accident, and I'll make sure I'm there to revel in your embarassment'.
Which was a shame, because when I did finally butter my own cheeks I simply told her I'd shat myself and my soiled undergarments were awaiting her attention in the bathtub.
( Slippery Mick ‏, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:40, Reply)

I read a lovely article in the hand-wringers a couple of years ago about two teenage girls who were found walking along the side of a dual carriageway.
They were about two miles outside town - apparently the mother got done for parental neglect or whatever, and the article was very much BROKEN BRITAIN, but it quickly became apparent that the girls had been playing up. The mother had said "If you don't cut that out I'll put you out of the car and you can WALK home!", they hadn't, so she did hahahaha

My dad used to beat me with a belt if I was proper acting up. The last time my mum tried to hit me was when I was about 16 and by then about a foot taller than her. It diffused the situation as we both laughed at how pathetic it was, as these days I could easily have my mum in a fight.

Alt: I like anything with soul and balls.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:42, Reply)

No, my dad just beat us

( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:42, Reply)

Not enough.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)

+off

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:11, Reply)

we did get smacked, but hardly ever, and it was just a tap on the buttocks
the humiliation was far more painful than the punishment. i think i only got smacked twice, but it was the only thing my brother understood. he was just fucking naughty for the sake of it. he got away with lots of shit because he looked like a little golden haired angel.

one day he was about 3, and he was pissing around in church, despite having been told repeatedly to be good. eventually he tore a hymn book, so dad slung him over his shoulder and carried him out to mete out justice in the graveyard. desperate to postpone the inevitable, my brother was frantically reaching out to everyone to shake hands, piping, "peace be with you" and trying to look as cute as possible.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)

also one day my mother got so annoyed with him throwing things out of the trolley in the supermarket that she told him she was going to smack him when they got home
and he could think about it ALL THE WAY HOME. she then promptly forgot all about it, having a million and one other things to do.

until they got home, and this defiant little voice piped up from the backseat, "I'M NOT THINKING ABOUT THAT SMACK, I'M NOT." i think he might actually have been let off that one, she laughed so hard.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:45, Reply)

he's an accountant now
look at what it did to him. LOOK AT WHAT IT DID.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:45, Reply)

Pffft.
What a LOSER.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)

My Mum tried to smack me once, but I was a bit too old then and just laughed at her.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:59, Reply)

Got spanked with a flip-flop once
that was definitely less pain, more humiliation. Not sure if that was the intent but it really didn't hurt. Top tip for the parents here, use a football boot or one of those spiked running shoes.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)

leather slipper hurts like hell too.
(Stibbins, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:23, Reply)

No idea, can't remember
probably means they beat me senseless and I have repressed it.

Or not. I'm veering towards not.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:43, Reply)

No threats, instant whacks.
But I always knew where I stood...or fell

Elbow, Mumford, Snow Patrol
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:44, Reply)

I tell you what, there's a lot of beaten children on here.
Freud would have a fucking field day. After he'd finished wanking over YM.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:45, Reply)

Only once was it sustained.
Think he had flashbacks to the sight of POWs in Japan.
Mother dragged him off and he never hit me again.
( edjogs Collared doves are shit., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)

No, my Mum was nice to me. And you by the sound of things.
Alt: Too many to have a favourite. I like that new Motörhead album. I also ordered a limited edition 1 of 100 vinyl record recently.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:44, Reply)

Limited vinyl is well cool.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)

Yes I know. I paid a hefty price for this little number. It better be good.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)

it's gonna be shit

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:09, Reply)

I have been unreliably informed it might be 'alright'

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:10, Reply)

look mate
If it ent been in the top 20, then it ent sold very well. People will only spend money on good music, therefore it's shit.

You can't argue with that, otherwise you're saying that you know better than everyone that bought the stuff in the top 20.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:15, Reply)

This, of course is unequivocally true.
But, come on! LIMITED EDITION! LIMITED TO 100 COPIES! It must be AWESOME.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:16, Reply)

^ TGGI

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:18, Reply)

Have you sold many copies of your 'music'?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:19, Reply)

Oh yeah, I reckon we'll be into double figures soon.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:20, Reply)

That bad? Really?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:21, Reply)

haha! his "drone folk" yurt hop shit?
What do you think?
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:21, Reply)

Dunno as no-one tells me who they are.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:21, Reply)

ask Rory

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:24, Reply)

is it a self-released vanity project, limited by the number of copies in the smallest batch available from the supplier?

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:19, Reply)

I don't imagine this is the case, these guys are clearly going places, and I wanted to get in early.
I mean who would do that sort of thing apart from some sort or massive wanker?
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:21, Reply)

the kind of cunt that equates wilful obscurity to high-minded musical intellectualism.
Musically about as enticing as a vegan's fart.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:23, Reply)

So, basically, best avoided. Got it.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:26, Reply)

Mrs V taught me that black vinyl is actually the most expensive
So when they do the limited edition red, blue, green versions, it's actually cheaper.

Bastards.

Still - MP3 is where it's at - much more convenient and accessible.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:51, Reply)

I got smacked a few times
Mostly because nothing else worked, I got angry rather than docile. Also my parents used to do the thing where if you acted up in the car, they'd threaten to leave you on the side of the road to walk home. This invariably backfired though because by the time they'd reach this point, I'd be in such a sulk that I'd refuse to get back into the car.

As I grow up I realise my parents had to put up with a lot and it triples my determination never to have kids.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:49, Reply)

You reap what you sow

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:50, Reply)

Exactly which is why I'm never having them
if I had me for a child I wouldn't even know where to start. Nothing worked.
( Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:53, Reply)

Based on my experiences of other peoples' children, I'd be mad to invite that sort of hell into my own life.

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:16, Reply)

The most bizarre threat, usually handed out when we were playing up in public
was "I'll take your pants down and smack your bottom". Never quite sure why the bare arse was necessary. Getting told off in front of other people was embarrassing enough. I can't remember the threat ever being carried out.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:52, Reply)

Hey - how come the other girl in the Sugarcubes didn't make it instead of Bjork?
She's prettier.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:53, Reply)

Is it because the Sugarcubes were shit?

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:57, Reply)

That's a good point.
Mind - it didn't do Bjeerrrrrk any harm though, did it?
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 11:59, Reply)

I guess stark staring lunacy has a novelty value.
Personally I think she's shit an' all.
( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:03, Reply)

She has a face I'd tire of jizzing on.

(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:17, Reply)

This wasn't supposed to happen

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:00, Reply)

Prettier than that Riddler-faced weirdo?
You don't say.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:00, Reply)

Well
1. Magga was fucking ugly too
2. She was a keyboard player.
3. Beeeeyoork was already an established artist in her own right before The Sugarcubes
4. THEY'RE ALL SHIT!
( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:07, Reply)

I don't like this thread
It's depressing.
( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:04, Reply)

I feel quite at home.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:05, Reply)

You should start a new one.
It better be good, though.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:05, Reply)

Not going to happen
I have never started a good thread, topics like fruit woes are beyond my imagination.
( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:09, Reply)

What I want to know is why Stibbso posted it and then fucked off without getting involved

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:06, Reply)

Kept on getting threatened that I'd be kicked out.
It got boring after a while so I left. Well 'ard.
( Frisbee OG wanker, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:04, Reply)

alt:
Pearl Jam, Metallica, Yngwie Malmsteen, Alter Bridge, Pendulum and The Doors.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:11, Reply)

All music is shit and you're a cunt

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:14, Reply)

imma shit in your fanny

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:15, Reply)

Didn't get smacked much but once got a elastic band flicked at my arse, really hurt. Also my mate was messing about at dinner once and his mum slapped a fork round his face.
(Stibbins, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:17, Reply)

I once had a pencil sharpened over my head
Needless to say this did not sit well with me.
I can't really remember what happened next.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:19, Reply)

You started shavings.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:29, Reply)

Also been threatened with a smack from a massive leather belt I won from a kickboxing fight
(Stibbins, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:21, Reply)

Alt: Feeder, Kasabian,, Oasis, The Twang and the Enemy.
(Stibbins, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:24, Reply)

This has to be trolling, right?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:26, Reply)

I was thinking the same thing.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:27, Reply)

Sure, everybody knows that The Fairport Convention and The Levellers are the only REAL bands

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:27, Reply)

I think it's spelt
LEV
ELL
ERS

For true hippy/crusty authenticity.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:28, Reply)

oh man I remember that from school
Also:

Some Girls Wander by Mistake.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:31, Reply)

Nothing like a band formed of public-school south coast trustafarians
for that authentic hippy/crusty vibe.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:31, Reply)

I believe BatteRed is a Levellers fan

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:32, Reply)

They are fucking awful.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:34, Reply)

I think the entire hipster attitude was summed up on B3ta a few months ago with
"I hated my music taste before it was unfashionable to do so."
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:36, Reply)

I liked it when they told people that there's only one way of life.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:37, Reply)

I liked it when they reminded us that it was the things that you do in the garden that matter, not blood sweat and tears.
Deep AND insightful.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:41, Reply)

I was watching Jules Holland yesterday.
There was a young lady on there who's song had the opening line "This beat is sick, this sound is ill."

It was very moving.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:42, Reply)

whose

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:44, Reply)

I believe her name was Katy B.
She was relatively pretty. Blonde.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:52, Reply)

I felt the same when Gwen Stefani told me all about her 'fruit woes' when she was furnished with some poor quality B-A-N-A-N-A-S

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:45, Reply)

I liked it when they claimed to be 'sick of touring' despite identifying with the 'traveller' lifestyle.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:44, Reply)

It seemed they were committing treason
By trying to live on the road!
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:53, Reply)

I was particularly amused by the 100,000 people all standing around me
at Glastonbury in 1994 singing that "there was only one way of life, and that's your own"

ironysheeplols.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:32, Reply)

No band is real unless they come from Sheffield, couldn't afford their own instruments
And spent at least 20 years in jail for dealing drugs to try and climb out of the poverty imposed on them by THATCHER.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:33, Reply)

no band is real unless they deliberately reject the hegemony of traditional instruments in favour of turntables, samplers and laptops.
Anything else is mere pandering to the traditional paradigm of patriarchal performance tropes and is tired, intellectually barren and ethically bereft.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:36, Reply)

Yeah, it's like, 2013, yeah, and people aren't making ALL music digitally. Move with the times, Grandads.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:39, Reply)

innit doe
Nobody's fooled by these hipster pricks.

Techno, house, garage, jungle and hip hop can only be made and enjoyed by black people.

Anybody else doing so is a culture tourist wigger just trying to be black.

Ditto jazz and all forms of rock n' roll. And soul.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:42, Reply)

You need to listen to Heart FM.
It's the rock n' roll radical station that's more ironic than a single spoon.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:41, Reply)

I liked their traditional English folk music inspired didgeridoo.

( Kroney, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:42, Reply)

Überlol

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:43, Reply)

SNAP!
No, wait, the other thing...
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:27, Reply)

My mate was tour manager for The Enemy when they toured with Oasis
I don't know if this is good or bad.
( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:27, Reply)

That depends, did he take the opportunity to punch the newt-faced midgets?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:28, Reply)

I think he took advantage of the free sex, drugs and rock and roll

( Peej, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:35, Reply)

Did he take the opportunity to repeatedly shit in both band's coffee pots?
If the answer is yes, then it's good.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:30, Reply)

b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post1870220
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:37, Reply)

My mate got a kick up the arse with his dad's timberlands once after getting threatened with about 5 times. Almost started crying.
(Stibbins, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:37, Reply)

That can happen if you
Don't be too quick, to walk away.
( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:39, Reply)

alrite jeffthedogfucker poster
tell me something, yeah? i ent got no celebrity connections and what with you being so fucken popular in all regards im quite sure i was wondering..when its offered up on a plate, do you lick it clean?
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:06, Reply)

ITS ALRITE GUYS I FOUND MR SKELLINGTON IN MY JACKET LINING! PHEW!!!

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 12:58, Reply)

I love you Reg.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:02, Reply)

im still gutted about my free sunglasses mind weepee but i donno shit about horse teeth and i ent got no chickens
so im calling that a win for team reggie!!
( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:04, Reply)

Koool

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:16, Reply)

i found this and think it should win etc, etc

( Reginald Donkeyfuck, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:15, Reply)

\o/

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:16, Reply)

Bit gay Reg, bit gay.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:28, Reply)

I sometimes got a belt.
Didn't do me any harm apart from my sado-masochistic tendancies and murdering.

I like a lot of synth pop / dance stuff. Not that generic EDM shit they are rolling out now. A lot of Swedish artists. More solo artists than 'bands' as such.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:01, Reply)

typical bender

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:03, Reply)

Yeah well...
Fuck off, innit.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:04, Reply)

flying the rainbow flag for individuality rather than stereotypes

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:06, Reply)

Well, it's my individual music taste. Not all I listen to.
Maybe there's something in them stereotypes.

and I re-iterate... Fuck off.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:11, Reply)

HIT THAT PERFECT BEAT

( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:06, Reply)

In a bizarre twist of fate I had to threaten your mum with the hose
Because it wouldn't put the lotion in the bucket
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:06, Reply)

Did it rub the lotion on its skin, or did it get the hose again?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:07, Reply)

   
( drimble he'd been white, he'd been black, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:11, Reply)

PUTTHEFUCKINGLOTIONINTHEBASKET

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:12, Reply)

This threads getting a bit long,
Is Stubbins in it or has she asked a question and fucked off?
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:19, Reply)

ask us another one

( rachelswipe with a fork, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:21, Reply)

I've done my bit for today.
You do it fatty.
( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:23, Reply)

It's posted a couple of answers to its own question, but not really got involved anywhere else.
Is it too soon to call cunt?
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:22, Reply)

Nah.

( Windy Pig I'm naturally quite suspicious about the moon., Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:23, Reply)

I'll do it right now then.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:24, Reply)

Fuck off, cunt.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Mon 28 Oct 2013, 13:24, Reply)