Board of that now
Seeing as a disproportionate number of offtopicers went to boarding school, I'm keen* to hear your views on this weird phenomenon.
Would you consider sending your own kids away to boarding school?
Do you think it was the making of you, or did you spend most of your time ablooblooing in your 'dorm' wondering why your parents hated you so much?
Why did your parents hate you so much?
Tell us your tales.

Alt: For the few normal people her who attended a proper school, did you ever think boarding would have been a right jolly hockeysticks laugh hahaha yeah? Or are you glad to have retained your anal virginity?


*bored enough
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 8:55, 220 replies, latest was 11 years ago)

state school prick

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 8:58, Reply)

Driving up house prices instead.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:00, Reply)

excellent
Keep the thicko proles where they belong. Renting and paying someone else's mortgage.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:03, Reply)

Nope, not at all
Although my kids are at a Catholic school this is due to it being a feeder school for Mrs Cow's school at comprehensive level

I'm glad my back doors are intact
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:00, Reply)

Did you have to pretend to be a God-botherer in order to secure their places?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:03, Reply)

I didn't but Mrs Cow is (a bit)

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:16, Reply)

No, just a paedophile.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Louis Prima's less successful....etc.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:23, Reply)

OK a geniune answer
I went to a state boarding school not a private one, it was an elected payment so had a lot of forces children etc, there who would pay a percentage of the fees. I got in due to being bright but a fucking tearaway.

At the time it provided a far better education than any of the local comps. The rules allowed me to do far better than I would have done at a comp, and yes I think that boarding schools do offer a much better education that day schools, I would welcome more state boarding schools as they are tarnished with the brush of the Eton's of the world.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:03, Reply)

you didn't learn about apostrophes though.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:04, Reply)

I'd never heard of these until now.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:10, Reply)

There used to be a few
I think that a lot of them got shut down towards the end of the previous Tory government. I know my old school is now a housing development
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:12, Reply)

There is a groundswell of opinion in some sectors that their reintroduction would be a good thing for those poor little shits whose parents are scummers.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:14, Reply)

I would tend to agree
It does provide a stable environment for kids who have potential but are let down by the local environment.
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:21, Reply)

It's wasted on pricks like you though, eh?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:29, Reply)

Oh hell yeah

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:30, Reply)

I went to an all boys grammar school. It was shit, and that's why I'm thick and have a crap job.
Although I don't honestly think I would have done any better anywhere else. I just lacked application.
And boarders get brutally raped, and I wasn't up for that. And they are all bummers.
( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:06, Reply)

So surely the raping isn't to much of problem then?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:08, Reply)

I meant that as a general derogatory term, rather than the physical manifestation of homosexuality present in boarders.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:09, Reply)

Why wouldn't you want to be away from your parents living with your friends?
Unless you are some kind of pussy mummy's boy?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:07, Reply)

Cognitive dissonance right here.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:09, Reply)

Genuinely I was never ever home sick
Prep school was awesome, pretty old school really. No computers andTVs , we made our own fun "outside" it was all very simple and innocent.

Public school is harder work, but that's teenagers for you. Still fun though, albeit with some quite severe bullying.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:20, Reply)

lly gger
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:28, Reply)

Thats the best bit

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:30, Reply)

^ This is strikethrough humour at its absolute best here

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:31, Reply)

Well played, there.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:09, Reply)

So are you planning on sending the mini-apes to boarding school?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:12, Reply)

I dunno, it's pretty expensive. Although mater and later said they'd help out
Really it'll depend on where we are living and the local schools/academy's/free schools/grammars/colleges/ and whatever else they call them these days.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:16, Reply)

I was both a day boy (GAY boy!) and a boarder.
You miss out on a lot of quite important socialisation as a day pupil. Important decisions and plans tended to be made during the evening activities, prep and after lights out - also adventures.

Alt: went to see the White Lies last night. They weren't nearly as good as they were earlier in the year at their secret gig, and their drummer needs replacing - was slowing down and speeding up all over the shop. His technique's good, but his timing and tempo are atrocious.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:07, Reply)

White Lies (Don't Do It)

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:10, Reply)

No - that's White LiNes (Don't Do It) by Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five. That was a rap record from the early 1980s.
White Lies are something of a generic rock band, very much in the vein of Ultravox and a little like some of the early Depeche Mode stuff.

DUH.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:26, Reply)

Sounds well shit

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:26, Reply)

White Lies aren't very good.
This is your problem.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:14, Reply)

They're certainly no Coldplay, but I like their studio work.
But honestly - their drummer is terrible - to the point that everyone around me was making that sort of cringy, well-this-is-embarrassing face at points.
( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:24, Reply)

A band is only ever as good as their drummer

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:27, Reply)

dr B
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:36, Reply)

This thread is shit.

( JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:13, Reply)

I agree, mine was marginally less shit, and was stomped before it peaked.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:14, Reply)

It was already petering out.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:16, Reply)

No it wasn't

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:20, Reply)

Alright Jeffers.
Please would you gaz me details for Sunday?
( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:16, Reply)

+ and then constantly refer to them in barely veiled terms on here as often as possible

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:17, Reply)

He posted the details here a while ago. I just can't find them.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:19, Reply)

^JEALOUS^

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:20, Reply)

There truly is nothing quite as much fun as socialising with a group of people who don't really know each other
and simply bond through their mutual alcohol dependency.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:45, Reply)

You could always set up a protest bash at the same place and then not turn up.

( Kroney, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:46, Reply)

Depends, are they having a bash next to one of my favourite restaurants and are my real life friends available to come and jon me?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:49, Reply)

Yeah, sure, why not?

( Kroney, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:51, Reply)

I have certainly enjoyed meeting people who couldn't even be bothered to muster up as much as a 'hello'

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:50, Reply)

Being clever and that, I got awarded a scholarship to a public school, day boy innit.
Also had boarders and 'weekly boarders' a strange breed that boarded during the week but went home for weekends. Ifelt sorry for one kid, his parents lived 2 minutes away, he was still a full boarder, they must haverreally loathed him.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:30, Reply)

Poor Nakers

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:31, Reply)

http://m.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-india-25329065
Poor Nakers.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:44, Reply)

I went to see Black Sabbath last night
They were superb. I didn't think Ozzy would be able to cut it anymore, but apart form shuffling like an old man, he pulled it off rather well.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:41, Reply)

i read this as he pulled off an old man
I prefer it this way
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:43, Reply)

Where was my invite? I had to book a ticket by myself and lurk at the back

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:48, Reply)

We were right up in the gods

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:50, Reply)

my mum hated her boarding school so much that she said she'd never send us away, even when we reeeeeally pissed her off
to be fair, a catholic convent run by nuns doesn't sound like much fun. but my friends who went to boarding school all loved it; in fact a couple of their younger siblings begged to go too because they heard so much about it.

not sure I could do it, unless my kid was a total little shit, but if they wanted to go, then weekly boarding then home at the weekends might be a good compromise.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:42, Reply)

I think it's a fucking ridiculous idea
why the fuck would you want children and then want to send them away for someone to look after unless you're a complete fucking cunt with no idea of how to be a parent?
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:44, Reply)

So your kids will be begging to go then

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:46, Reply)

officesmirk

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:49, Reply)

NO SMIRKING IN THE PLACE OF WORK

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:52, Reply)

oh man

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:53, Reply)

Its funny because of the north east accent

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:54, Reply)

haha

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:49, Reply)

The 3 'b's. Beatings, buggery and bad food.

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:52, Reply)

This is nicely sweeping well done

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:49, Reply)

You're just upset because your parents were complete fucking cunts with no idea of how to be parents.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:50, Reply)

Hahaha yeah

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:53, Reply)

maybe the kid is also a complete fucking cunt and you can't wait to see the back of it
no idea on a serious answer. all I know is, several of my friends actively begged to go, and really enjoyed it. but my parents would never have allowed it.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:51, Reply)

I have a hard enough time leaving mine at nursery in the morning.
I couldn't even imagine sending them away for 12 weeks at a time. Especially not when they're going through all the interesting ages.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:52, Reply)

Only a sick man would get hard at a nursery
I suggest you take a long look at your life choices in the mirror
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:54, Reply)

Yeah, cos it's all about you isn't it?

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:54, Reply)

But boarding schools are no better for your child than a normal comp, so the decision to send your kid off is purely a selfish one on the part of the parents.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:58, Reply)

If I had a kid, there's no way I'd send it to a fucking comprehensive.
Talk about your lowest common denominator schooling.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:01, Reply)

And yet I came out with all A's through GCSE and A level and a first class degree.
It's amazing how bad these schools are.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:05, Reply)

christ
all this shows is that you were boning an examiner
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:08, Reply)

Yes, because a sample size of one out of many hundreds is representative.
Was one of your As in statistics?
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:10, Reply)

Actually you are far more likely to get a better education if your parents are wealthy, regardless of where you go to school
That's what the statistics show.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:15, Reply)

That is possibly the stupidest thing I have seen you type (and believe me there are some contenders)

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:20, Reply)

OH NO SOMEONE ON THE INTERENET THINKS I'M WRONG.
Go on then, give me a top ten.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:27, Reply)

at 10 using the word INTERENET
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:30, Reply)

This is great. Carry on.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:31, Reply)

better than t'internet or interwebs
I want to murder people who say things like that
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:32, Reply)

do you want to murder dem wif der fwuffeh kittumz?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:37, Reply)

That's probably because children of wealthy families are more likely to be intellectually stimulated at a young age
and not just left to rot in front of the television.
Statistically, children from lower income families don't have books in the house, or do extracurricular activities, or spend time talking as a family.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:37, Reply)

Yep, that's probably about right.
Plus the parents are more likely to take an interest in their childs schooling and will often push them.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:40, Reply)

^this

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:44, Reply)

Well this is a stupid post
If you live in the catchment for shit schools then your kid is screwed, the private system allows you to choose a good school.

Maybe you shouldn't wade in discussions weighed down with your hand ringing prejudices until you have thought things through.
( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:02, Reply)

^ This ^

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:03, Reply)

psssst
he lives in barnet. he'll just be lucky if rory doesn't nick it and flog it to travellers.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:05, Reply)

Ill informed man is wrong on the internet shock

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Your kid isn't at the "little shite" age yet then

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:54, Reply)

yeah....
come back and read this when she's constantly arguing with her siblings about pointless crap and locked in the bathroom for hours squeezing spots and dyeing her hair and ruining the carpet with it and never even accidentally cleaning up after herself and running up massive phone bills and staying out late and getting drunk and sucking off teenage boys behind the pub and testing your boundaries all the time and your wife is screaming blue murder because her menopause is clashing with your kid's adolescence and the pair of them can't stand one another and it all seems to be about nothing more than a wet towel left on the floor and why can't they just get on and

LIGHTBULB! YOU'LL GO TO BOARDING SCHOOL YOURSELF.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:57, Reply)

One plus point of getting divorced; not having to put up with my wife's menopause at some future point.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Oh, believe me, you will be made to suffer it one way or another.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:00, Reply)

Some people never change.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:58, Reply)

Hahaha!
This sounds so much like the stepson's house. No wonder he's always working overtime.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:59, Reply)

I'm going to have a garage. I'm going to soundproof it and make it my own studio/games room.
I shall have a lock on the door.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:59, Reply)

and then you'll get back to it
after a long, hard day at work paying for everyone and everything, sidestepping another screaming row between wife and daughter about some sort of top that is too expensive/slutty, you get in there only to find that your son and his horrible lanky teenage mates have been in, the fridge has been denuded of beer, it's a complete mess, names like BAZ AND DAZ AND THE COCKMAN have wiped you off the high score on all your games, the king on your white chessmen is suspiciously stained and brown, and the whole place smells suspiciously... warm and stale and salty. much like the crusty tissues down the side of the armchair.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:02, Reply)

Ha ha ha!

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:05, Reply)

You enjoyed your teenage years?

(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:00, Reply)

well hell yeah
I was the teenager
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:02, Reply)

How many times did you pull the 'you're not my real mum' line?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:05, Reply)

my half brother did it a few times

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:07, Reply)

The reason I went
was because my dad was in the army, and moving schools every two years would have really fucked with my education.
There are lots of reasons people send their kids to boarding school, and they don't all involve hating them.

When I first went to uni, I was amazed how many mummy's boys and girls had never spent a night away from home before. The couldn't manage their own laundry, or make even the most rudimentary meal for themselves. That's worse parenting, right there.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:54, Reply)

Yes, it probably is.
But when I went to uni I could do my laundry and I could cook and I had spent many nights away from home before.

You're surely not suggesting that the two choices available to a parent are a) be shit or b) send your child to boarding school? Of course you're not. That would be ludicrous.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:01, Reply)

Well, obviously not.
Like you're not suggesting all children in boarding schools are unloved.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:02, Reply)

or only a shit parent could send their kid there

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:03, Reply)

But we are all agreed that Nakers' shit parents didn't love him?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:44, Reply)

I went to a good comp.
I met a few public schoolboys during my time at school and they were mostly total pricks. They were all from single gender boarding houses and it seemed that not mixing with girls that often retarded their social skills by about five years.
( Kroney, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:45, Reply)

o/

( Naked Ape call me Caitlyn, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:49, Reply)

On our field trip to Athens at 17
there was a group of boarders in the same hostel thing. They were all but openly masturbating when they saw the girls in our group.

Hardly representative admittedly, but that kind of thing burns itself into your memory.
( Kroney, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:54, Reply)

Like Bonzo, my boarding school was a state one
and most of the boarders were forces kids, like me. Oddly, most of the day pupils were from rich families, so it was the boarders who wereconsidered povvos.

I'm really glad I went, though. From the age of 11 I was able to do my own laundry, travel the Tube with heavy suitcases in hand, and basically be quite independent. Oh, and I also learned how to swear like a sailor.

And by the time I left for uni, I still had all my virginities intact, thank you very much.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:47, Reply)

What a fucking prude

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:49, Reply)

I think the words you're looking for
are 'fat, speccy, swotty, unattractive loser'.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:50, Reply)

keep......going......

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:51, Reply)

terrible bullying of the cow

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:51, Reply)

I dont even have a glasses

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:53, Reply)

Only empty ones.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:59, Reply)

I asked for Jagermeister and good red wine for Christmas

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:59, Reply)

Ace 8

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:02, Reply)

I'm asking for a week off

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:03, Reply)

ee an
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:07, Reply)

It's on the list too

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:09, Reply)

no no no
the whole point is not to give any idea about it, so that people panic and sweat and ignore the one thing you really want...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:03, Reply)

Well that's just fucking stupid.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:05, Reply)

if you tell someone what you really want and it doesn't even cost a penny, in fact it saves them money, surely not seizing on that like a fat kid on a cupcake
is the fucking stupid thing
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:07, Reply)

Depends if you know what they're talking about

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:08, Reply)

MEN
they never listen
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:09, Reply)

What?

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:10, Reply)

Have I mentioned I'm a certified Support to Stop Smoking counsellor?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:08, Reply)

no!
any literature you feel like sharing...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:09, Reply)

You can get 12 weeks of counselling support
and all the NRT bits and pieces you need, at the cost of a prescription. If you don't pay for prescriptions, it's all free.

Check out your local NHS website. Bear in mind that from next month, every man jack and his dog will be trying to give up, so getting an appointment may be a bit harder.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:12, Reply)

ah no, i've never smoked myself, i bloody hate it
I just thought it might be v useful for those who do! good on you, that's a good thing to do.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:15, Reply)

Smoking is cool
secondary smoke is a free bonus to non smokers
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:16, Reply)

^^

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:26, Reply)

Wheezing 5's

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:28, Reply)

I don't smoke

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:09, Reply)

And now you're perfectly well adjusted and dealing with life just fine aren't you.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:51, Reply)

To be fair, I think I'd probably still be a mental case if I'd stayed at home.
I'm just wired that way.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 9:56, Reply)

Did they have these posters up in the dorms?
i.imgur.com/BIl2jBn.jpg

I imagine they'd be needed with Nakers around.
( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:06, Reply)

WTF?

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:12, Reply)

Wanking for beginners

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:17, Reply)

It's for autists

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:19, Reply)

Ah so I shouldnt have printed out a copy for my office wall...

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:21, Reply)

Not unless you work in the Adolescent Autism Unit of a Psychiatric Hospital

( The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:28, Reply)

Ah...
*quietly takes down poster*
(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:29, Reply)

I don't know about anything else, but this fact certainly explains a lot.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:22, Reply)

I had to go to a meeting, so missed out on it developing
But that argument up there, that I can't be bothered to read, about the relative merits of boarding schools is precisely what I was hoping for.
Good work everyone.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:25, Reply)

Like you go to meetings

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:27, Reply)

Basically people who went to boarding schools think they're best and comp kids are pricks
whilst comp kids think comp schools are best and boarders are pricks.

Personally, I think they're all shit and everybody's a prick. Hope this helps illuminate.
( Kroney, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:28, Reply)

*votes Kroney*

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:30, Reply)

Except he's a prick

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:30, Reply)

Deosn't stop people voting for MPs
*Political boooom*
( Kroney, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:40, Reply)

I'm enjoying all the ^upset^ happening

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:28, Reply)

boarding/ private schools have their pros and cons.
As do state schools.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:30, Reply)

Why are you replying to me? I couldn't give a single flying fuck either way. I haven't been to school since 1997 and I don't want kids.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:31, Reply)

It's because he wants to touch your bottom in a sexual way

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:43, Reply)

Who doesn't?

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:45, Reply)

I only really like it touched non sexually.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:45, Reply)

Is that your excuse for not wiping properly before meeting swipe?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:46, Reply)

She can touch it, but not sexually. That's the rule.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:48, Reply)

Basically, Al doesn't earn a decent enough salary to pay for an education for his child & is attempting to disguise this with lefty hand wringing.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:31, Reply)

Wheras Battered is too fucking lazy to alienate and sexually abuse his own children and will be paying other people to do it for him.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:33, Reply)

Exactly!

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:34, Reply)

it's not all about money and nobody gives a fuck about your Al feud
Plus, the most middle class situation of all Is to be able to comfortably afford private school fees yet choose to send your kids to a state school.

Al earns over 50k, I'm sure he could find school fees.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:36, Reply)

I assume he has chosen the middle class lefty option of living in an area where the house prices are higher than average because of a good state school.

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:38, Reply)

it could be worse, he could be a renter

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:39, Reply)

Renters are scum. Sub human scum.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:41, Reply)

What feud? He's seems to be arguing with several people.

( Fucking hell Jeff I am not a robot, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:38, Reply)

Al is basically 'Chompy' if he ever 'made it'.
If he hasn't already had a disappointing fling with Swipe, it's on the cards.
( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:40, Reply)

I'm hoping so. I keep inviting her out for dinner but she never comes.
Because I have a small penis and I'm rubbish with my fingers.
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:41, Reply)

are you coming tonight?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:45, Reply)

Another secret bash I'm not invited to :(

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:47, Reply)

Me too, I'm out of the cool gang again :(

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:47, Reply)

Your novelty status has worn off
Stibbins is the hot ticket now
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:51, Reply)

it's 2 girls going for a drink
I think you'd have been out of place
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:55, Reply)

Just one cup?

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:04, Reply)

No
As he has a small penis and is rubbish with his fingers
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:48, Reply)

I have to sellotape two books together and squirt moisturiser between the covers to make a rudimentary masturbation aid.

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:49, Reply)

The Great Twatsby

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:57, Reply)

Superb

(Bonzodog29 is an unemployed sponge of the worst kind, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:58, Reply)

Nah, I had my share of our mutual friend last night. Plus I've got a baby to look after and shit.
Are you free on the 18th for burritos?
(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:48, Reply)

yep
of course, if you'd sent the kid to boarding school, like a normal person...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:55, Reply)

oh

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:56, Reply)

yes?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:57, Reply)

yeah

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:57, Reply)

yeah?

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:03, Reply)

You sure? You're not going to say you're free and then wimp out at the last minute or something?

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:56, Reply)

with work it's always possible
but hopefully should be ok that day. I have a big high court hearing at 11am so will need a drink.
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:58, Reply)

Is that in English?
Because I've read it a few times, and I got nothing.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:40, Reply)

for if read of and for us read is

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:41, Reply)

autocomplete woes

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:41, Reply)

Ah, right. Gotcha.

( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:42, Reply)

YES!!!! queen of teh popular page

( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:32, Reply)

They were both tl;dr for my tastes

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:33, Reply)

The popular page is shit

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:39, Reply)

it only takes two clicks to get on there

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:40, Reply)

Clickin dis

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:42, Reply)

Jay is currently winning the popular page with 5 votes.
One of swipe's posts is close behind with 3, as is that picture of battered.
( b3th Not shit. Not mod., Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:43, Reply)

3 clicks.
Wow.
(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:44, Reply)

I'm only there by simply typing 'gay prick' with some accents and shit. It's not a difficult page to appear on.

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:47, Reply)

Camouflage.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:48, Reply)

It's a click from me!

( MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:49, Reply)

Technically I'm on there twice
Once for Battered wishing me happy birthday
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:49, Reply)

For fuck's sake, if squeezing out of your mum's fanny is a reason for PP qualification then we should all of us get a mention there.

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:55, Reply)

Does one still qualify by saying 'Al is a cunt'?

( Amorous Badger NAKED BEA ARTHUR PHOTOS 4U, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:52, Reply)

I hope so

(Bazongaloid, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 10:59, Reply)

Yess!!
Validate me, bitches!!
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:05, Reply)

ah yes
the true queen of the popular page...
( rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:06, Reply)

it's in my nature to be popular

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:06, Reply)

I went to a comprehensive.
and I still ended up a bummer.

Go figure.
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:06, Reply)

Its probably the putting of winkies into manholes

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:07, Reply)

it's good to have a hobby!

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:08, Reply)

Get fucked Jeff, it was excellent
b3ta.com/questions/offtopic/post2165834
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:14, Reply)

A teacher has been banned from teaching for 3 years for calling kids pricks, poofs, ugly and big ears.
Catholic school lols.
(Pookie Bear had some very shiny foez, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:14, Reply)

They have to be on here...

( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:18, Reply)

There are definitely pricks, poofs and ugly people
Not sure about big ears
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:19, Reply)

I have plastic screw on ones.
I meant the teacher but TTJ
( GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:29, Reply)

TWITJ

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Wed 11 Dec 2013, 11:31, Reply)