Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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You will all be pleased to know I am getting a dude in to do my garden (jungle) (not a euphemism)Couldn't be arsed with all that cutting and weeding and trimming.
What do you employ people to do in your life?
alt. Where do you source your news from? Twitter? Red Tops, News channels?
AltAlt. dunno LOL
Just chat, dammit. How is you Tuesday panning out?
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:48,
152 replies,
latest was 11 years ago)
* sees obvious comment ** Braces *
*Ahem*
I am sure you will love getting a man in...
*looks around*
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:50, Reply)
CCCCCCC BBBBBBB EEEEEEE EEEEEEEE SSSSSSSS EEEEEEEE
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CCCCCCC BBBBBBB EEEEEEE EEEEEEEE SSSSSSSS EEEEEEEE
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:51,
Reply)
tggi^I'd fuck the crack of dawn if I was up early enough
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:00,
Reply)
For fucks sake Jase it's a bit of fucking gardening. MTFU and do it yourself.It's not like you're building the pyramids, is it? I hope your bloke wears the trousers or else you're fucking doomed.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:53, Reply)
Nah fuck it. I will keep on top of it once it's done. I just want the whole thing cleared. I will find solace in drinking gin while he does it.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:55,
Reply)
Man up and get the strimmer out.I don't employ anybody for anything I can do myself.
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Kroney, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:55,
Reply)
I ent got one. It'll cost me the same to buy all the fuckin tools.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:55,
Reply)
Whitney's posthumous offerings were shit.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:05,
Reply)
You will need 'all the fuckin tools' to 'keep on top of it once it's done' HTH(
MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:59,
Reply)
No no no. He'll be able to keep on top of it with some kitchen scissors and his faithful marigolds.(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:01, Reply)
True dat. I have shears and forks an that. It's a literal jungle. Shrubs need removing, there are blackberry vines right across it. Fuck that.
I'm getting the concrete jet washed too.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:01,
Reply)
You are able to wankAnd yet you hire 1000's of whores to fulfil this purpose, I mean I know you like to kill them afterwards but...
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:04, Reply)
^this^I bought a petrol strimmer for 80 quid and now sorting out my garden is a piece of piss.
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Slippery Mick ‏, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:46,
Reply)
Cleaner, gardener and childcare.Alt: R4 of course.
Altalt: LOL
alright
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:56,
Reply)
Hiya!That other you is besmirching your good name.
He used to be good apparently
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:03,
Reply)
I'm only really bothered about the opinions of people who recognise my user numberThe rest can get fucked
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:05,
Reply)
I'm quite enjoying the deforestation of my gardenAlmost sorted now. Didn't get a chance to buy some trees but might this weekend. Raised bed space has been cleared and foundations poured. Just tidying up the bricks to use ready for the weekend but I might need another 100 or so to get it all sorted
I employ a cleaner and a dog walker.
Alt:
BBC News mainly
Tuesday ent going bad so far. Have just Sherlocked a right problem out
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:59,
Reply)
Oh yeahChildminder too and out of school club once a week
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 13:59,
Reply)
I will get butcher with time, but if I'm earning the money, why not have someone do all the hard work?That's what I've learned.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:02,
Reply)
A cleaner, Sporters?You're married FFS. Pull your trousers back on and get her told.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:06, Reply)
My cleaner is fucking brilliantShe even takes my gay dog out on the day she comes
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:13,
Reply)
None of this is remotely acceptable unless she has enormous chebs, an Eastern European accent and sketchy moral values.(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:17, Reply)
I want you to go away and have a serious think about your actions.(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:41, Reply)
Ah, you've met my cleaner(
The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 16:24,
Reply)
I enjoied doing mine toolifted paved area, seeded lawn, used the paving (as it was nice stone) to create a patio at the far end of the lawn overlooking nature reserve... However it now looks like a fucking bombsite again as it hasn't stop pissing it down
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:07, Reply)
Once that bit is done it will be Operation Rebuild Greenhouse(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:16,
Reply)
Mine is the frontWe cleared it out but again want to get some lawn as it gets great sun and as we are out in the sticks would be good to get a table out there,
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:27, Reply)
I need to replace my lawn as its a bit boggyNo point as getting extension done next year. Will sort it after that so working from the bottom of the garden up
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:32,
Reply)
A bit boggy is an understatementas we have a cut through into the reserve we use it to take the dog out and the lawn is fucked... I am hoping that I can bring it back with a good drainage and some sharp sand. Then reseed and get the "dog piss" burns out and should be golden
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:39, Reply)
As a matter of course, I employ nobody. Mainly because I have a pair of hands and am not a flailling spastic.But I will get specific tradesman in to do a specific job that is beyond my abilities. For example, I've got mates who are joiners and sparkies who could do a job considerably better and faster than I ever could, but I can do most DIY and decorating jobs no problem. As I am not a flailling spastic.
Alt: The Daily Mail. It gets right to the nub of the issue.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:05, Reply)
In this respect, the gardener can get it done quicker and with more finesse than I.Just in time to plant some petunias.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:06,
Reply)
I'm not entirely sure whether a gardener can cut a bit of grass, do a bit of strimming and pull out some weeds considerably better or faster than any able-bodied person.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:09, Reply)
How about a gay whose DIY expertise goes up to and including "changing a bulb"(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:12,
Reply)
I'd place "changing a bulb" higher on the Spastic Difficulty Scalethan "pressing a button on a strimmer".
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Kroney, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:13,
Reply)
Whatever, this is how its going down (matron)What I lack for in DIY I make up for by my excellent cooking and housekeeping.
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:15,
Reply)
Christ, Jay. You want to get a lesbian in for all that cooking and cleaning shit.(
Kroney, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:17,
Reply)
I've gone through the wire on two seperate hedge trimmersI still had the mad diy skillz to refit the plug back onto the 10cm of wire remaining, so I'm not a total feckin eejit. *prouds*
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Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:16,
Reply)
Fucking hell Jase. How old are you? Just curious.Have you considered that actually getting out of your sequined jimjams and doing a couple of hours graft in the garden might actually do you some good?
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:15, Reply)
Yep. Once the hard work is done.Im 32, and quite active, thanks. Just can't be bothered with the gardening.
Christ, it's not like Im rounding up Jews and sending them on holiday camps. I'm hiring a gardener for an afternoon!
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:24,
Reply)
Ignore the nasty men. They are jealous because they are ham fisted baboons that cannot afford to hire help.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:27, Reply)
I see you waited for clarification that he won't kill the jews before sticking up for him(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:30,
Reply)
for what it costs to pay a gardener a few times a yearcompared to buying equipment, maintaining it, doing the actual gardening when you could be in the pub - only a spastic would do that. unless they enjoy it, of course.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:33,
Reply)
Maintaining equipment? We're talking about maybe a lawnmower and a fucking fork.We're not looking after the equipment shed at Lord's FFS.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:45, Reply)
Judging by his profile pic on twitter, I'd guess pushing 40But these poofs always knock a few years off when telling others their age.
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:26,
Reply)
I hate DIY and am shit at it - I'm an artist, dammit, not a bloody labourer.Therefore anything beyond putting up shelves involves me having to source some sort of working class-type, so that I can avoid spraining my weak wrists.
Last time I put up some shelves, they nearly killed Mrs Vagabond.
I get my news from the BBC - it's the world's most reliable news source.
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Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:05,
Reply)
I'll never understand why some people have so much difficulty putting screws into a wall.(
Kroney, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:07,
Reply)
Give me your address - I'll come 'round and show you how hard it can be.(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:07,
Reply)
SCREWS.(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:14,
Reply)
I fucking hate gardeningI leave all that to the missus.
Alt: The word on the street
Someone has come into the office with a baby. The only way this could piss me off more is if they started telling me about the dream they had last night as well.
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Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:14,
Reply)
I fucking hate it when brats get brought into the workplace.(
Kroney, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:15,
Reply)
I love bringing my brats into work and disrupting everything(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:22,
Reply)
I bet the productivity of Coventry halves when you bring your sexy kids in. (, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:26, Reply)
I don't even put on a fake cooing face or give any attention to them. I hate kids in restaurants too.
THIS IS ADULT TIME!
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GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:26,
Reply)
I once told a mother that if she tried to hand me her child I would let it fall to the floorI have been left alone when people bring in their children ever since
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:32, Reply)
I'd stick it back up her clowns pocket and staple it shut.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:36,
Reply)
Showing your lack of knowledge about female anatomy here love(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:39,
Reply)
I dunnoI have been with some pretty ropey birds and that description would probably work.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:40, Reply)
I've been potholing a few times in the past.(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:43,
Reply)
Don't do DIY, I am cack handed and so there is no enjoyment in it for me. I am quite happy to use a bathroom or kitchen without feeling the burning desire to fit it too.
I have a cleaner, no one likes cleaning so it makes sense.
Alt: many sources. Not the internet.
I have my appraisal soon so I'll let you know.
(, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:21, Reply)
A quick line in the bogs before you go in should give you all the confidence you need(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 14:47,
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He's like that dude in Die Hard.Asks for a can of Coke and BLAM! Hans blows his head clean off!
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Kroney, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:20,
Reply)
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:11,
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That took some working out(
sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:23,
Reply)
Works best if you sit back a bit(
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:24,
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This place would die on it's arse if I stopped posting(
GeordieJay Bummers are deaf, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:17,
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We have cleaners and a gardener for our house, does that count?Alt: When something appears on twitter, I'll keep an eye out for a legitimate source (if it isn't being reported by one already).
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Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:24,
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I just tend to assume all trending topics have something to do with Justin Bieberno matter how tenuous
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Bill Clay a.k.a. Claudio, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 16:04,
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MEATSNAKE Richard Hammond, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:32,
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Oh why can't we all just get along for once?!(
Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 15:57,
Reply)
Now I've got ^ envy :((
tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 16:08,
Reply)
It's to be expected reallyHe is the best one here, after all
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tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 11 Feb 2014, 16:10,
Reply)
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