Off TopicAre you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.
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rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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If you could have written any song/tuneIn the history of music, what would you have loved to have written and why?
Financial gain cannot be the reason.
Alt Q: Bacon or sausage sandwich?
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JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:49,
181 replies,
latest was 16 years ago)
I LOVE HORSES BEST OF ALL THE ANIMALS(
TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:51,
Reply)
I love horse pornBestiality animals.
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crackhouseceilidhband Fuck off back to Mumsnet, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:52,
Reply)
Anything by Oasisand then I'd keep it to myself.
And commit suicide.
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whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:51,
Reply)
I would settle for being able to writeany decent tune at all, instead of being the talent vacuum that I am.
BAAAAAAACCCCCCCOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNN. With brown sauce. Any other sauce is VILE HERESY.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:54, Reply)
Why is there such an obsession with bacon?it's not even that good.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:56, Reply)
Utter wrongness alert(
whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:57,
Reply)
You are entitled to your opinionbut I am afraid you are incorrect. Besides, I used to work in a food testing lab, I know what goes in to sausages.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:58, Reply)
You are eating the wrong bacon.Dry cured, smoked or unsmoked. Grilled so the fat is golden and the meat still pink.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:58,
Reply)
clearly I'm missing out on what is so spectacular about griddles. :((, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:44, Reply)
Grilled bacon can be superior to fried.We shall just have to agree to differ.
Cunt.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:54,
Reply)
bacon and sausage and egg and beanswith ketchup.
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:57,
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^THIS ketchup is for fucking peasants!no offence of course.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:59,
Reply)
because brown sauce is vileAnd I think the whole thing was called a Sandwedge which was awesome as it was a massive chunk of tiger bread. mmmmmmmmmm
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:59,
Reply)
I wonder what would happen if you get a fry up and a loaf of tigar bread, cut the top off the bread, scoop out the filling for dipping, fill the whole thing with the fry up, and serve.I think it would work well.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:02,
Reply)
dude I have pretty much done this in Essex with my mate Dannight after going to some pink toothbrush club or whatnot went to somerfield.
two tiger loafs
a pack of 12 sausages
6 eggs
12 bacon
,ushrooms
beans
all of this in two tiger loaves. Took a couple of hours to eat watching grandprix epic munchness!!
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:05,
Reply)
You get a sandwedgeat the low low price of around £3.49 from Cubbington bakery
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:05,
Reply)
I've said it before, and I'll say it again.Someone needs to invent Egg Yolk Sauce, basically it's just egg-yolk in a bottle, that maybe you can heat up to change the consitancy.
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G/PP 💩💩💩💩💩€, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:01,
Reply)
Egg Yolk is amazingbut I think some kind of bastardised processed bottled version could make me chuck...
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whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:05,
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please do thisand make the world a better place
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:07,
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*depants al*(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:13,
Reply)
wake up - Arcade FireYou've got a killer scene there man - QOTSA
New York I love you - LCD Soundsystem
I'm going slightly mad - Queen
Walk Hard - Dewey Cox
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 11:58,
Reply)
Ship building.Brilliant song. Political and poignant.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:01,
Reply)
Nine Inch Nails - The FragileTool - Lateralus
Bacon and cheese sandwich with brown sauce, or hot piri piri sauce.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:02,
Reply)
-(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:03,
Reply)
FUCK OFF(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:04,
Reply)
yup definitely gay(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:05,
Reply)
mayonnaise on a cheese and bacon sandwich?Seriously?
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:07,
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i secretly thinkhe has a point. Although it would be hard to pass up brown sauce on that slight chance
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:09,
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try it my friend. Not loads just a light spread.Its brilliant.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:09,
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Hmm...I think a while ago I had a baguette which was grated cheddar, chopped p bacon, pineapple and mayonnaise. That was nice.
But still, on my breakfast sandwich I want brown sauce or hot sauce!
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:10,
Reply)
that baguette sounds lovelynever liked brown sauce but hot piri piri is nice. Actually cheese and bacon is also truly scrumptious with Reggae Reggae sauce.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:13,
Reply)
Don't stop BelievingSo I could ban Glee from releasing their version which in turn would stop that awful channel five thing which seems to churn out millions of awful versions of it
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:04,
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I've never watched GleeYet I agree with you.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:05,
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I heartily support this(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:07,
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right now I want sausages(
Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:06,
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song: everlong by foo fighters(
Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:07,
Reply)
classic but brilliant shoutFriends ruined it for me for a while making it a wedding song. But secretly I think only because I would have wanted it as mine.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:08,
Reply)
did they?! eught!(
Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:09,
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I may have to defend thisit was an instrumental version on a small orchestra and it sounded awesome.
Booby is just jealous
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:11,
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ye that's trueit was beautiful but as its friends, yuck boo hiss!
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:11,
Reply)
You two going to the same wedding?Or is this a bizarre coincidence?
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:15,
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I assume they mean Friends, rather than friends(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:17,
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*redface*Well Boaby should remember his capital letters, yeah.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:19,
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pedantic gimpoid!(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:21,
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He's helping me becuase YOUR lack of capitalisation caused confusion(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:22,
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I'll apologise to you Roota but not him....................never him.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:23,
Reply)
I neither want, nor need your apologywhat is it with people getting touchy about me saying completely innocuous things?
like rosalicious yesterday evening.
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:24,
Reply)
I'm only teasing youI quite like it when you chastise me big boy.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:28,
Reply)
teasing is generally meant to be funny for someoneI wasn't chastising you though, that was my point. I was trying to help explain to Roota. When I said "I assume" I actually meant it
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:29,
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I had my funI'm sorry my lack of capitals led to this awkwardness. I will think about what I did.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:50,
Reply)
She's just a wind-up merchantBut Boaby, well, with him I think it's hatred
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:28,
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I don't hate anyone on hereand why am I now Boaby?
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:49,
Reply)
Jings crivens and help ma boab-y piratesTypical Scottish vernacular.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:51, Reply)
You should be a man of honour about this one(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:24,
Reply)
It was my weddingBobby was maid of honour but efused to shave his legs which caused a build up of static which didn't end well when he hugged Grandma
I'm sure your name used to be BoobyPirates?
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TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:20,
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grandma fucking loved it and positively creamed all over my nice morning suit(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:21,
Reply)
that was your username?!
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:30,
Reply)
he was BobbyPiresSomeone said it looked like BoobyPirates, so he changed it to that, then he was Atticus Flinch, and now he's Boaby again.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:32,
Reply)
grandma fucking loved it and positively creamed all over my nice morning suitsuits him better
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Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:37,
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^this, I'm easily led. Not sure about Boaby though(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:51,
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we both watched friends.Edit- Friends. Sorry Vipros!
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:20,
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daddy would you like some sausages(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:08,
Reply)
FTNSboth these sandwiches should be illegal.
"happy birthday".
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:10,
Reply)
Happy Birthday is a good one£185 royalty payment
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:11,
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can i have you on my next pub quiz team?ta!
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:18,
Reply)
I would be no use on the sports questions, not even the really easy ones.Q) What piece of sporting equipment do you use in Football?
a) A cricket bat
b) A shuttle-cock
c) A football
d) The Cutty Sark
"I think it's the Cutty Sark"
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:23,
Reply)
Anser: nonoe of the aboveIt was Mother Theresa
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:23,
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Mental mentalChicken oriental
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:27,
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I deleted it quick!Just as I posted it I thought "Hmm, that's too harsh on the lovely Rootz".
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:28,
Reply)
I throw myself at your mercyAnd plead forgiveness in light of the near-immediate post deletion.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:30,
Reply)
Are you doing so while nodding a littleA slight smirk on your face and filthy thoughts in your mind?
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:34,
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NoI look like a scouse mam who's purse has been robbed
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:36,
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Not in my mind you're not(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:38,
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What did he say?g'won, tell us
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:30,
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He called me a smack-addled Magistrate-fellater(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:32,
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Err...you got someone else's glasses on?(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:33,
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Touched a nerve, did I?(
Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:38,
Reply)
I have, on more than one occasionEstablished myself in a Judge's chambers.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:41,
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i am going to take this as a complimentand add "because you are sooooo amazing" on the end of it.
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rachelswipe with a fork, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:17,
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As long as bacon and sausage sandwiches remain legalI'll take the hit.
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Kroney, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:23,
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Song 2 by Blurnot because it's a good song, but because it gets sampled/used on everything. You see a trailer for a sporting event "WOO-HOO!", it's even been used in an episode of The Simpsons.
The royalty payments must be huge.
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:10,
Reply)
I would have written all of Bob Geldof's songs so that the only lyric is "Tnuk ma ya"Which I would have told him means "Save the children" in Somali.
Whereas in reality one would only need to play the record backwords to hear Bob saying "I am a cunt" repeatedly.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:12, Reply)
BothIn fact, a bacon and sausage sandwich, with egg, tomatoes and mushrooms.
Oh, I'm so hungry.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:12, Reply)
you people should stop fucking about with baconIt's beautiful on its own.
"Oh I love bacon, me!" Well if you're disguising it with sauce, you clearly fucking don't.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:18,
Reply)
A number of times I've just cooked baconAnd eaten it alone, using my hands.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:19,
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^all of the abovemy old housemate microwaved bacon the fucking Philistine.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:25,
Reply)
I didn't even knowyou could microwave bacon
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:31,
Reply)
I shall rememberthis handy life lesson
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:36,
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and it makes it minging texture and stuff(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:56,
Reply)
Madame George - Van Morrisonor Tinseltown In the Rain - Blue Nile
or Kangaroo - Big Star
Alt Q: Bacon, crispy with a bit of butter, no sauce necessary.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:20, Reply)
crispy edges, tender pink bits.(
SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:25,
Reply)
Ace. The one bit of DJing I did was at an "alternative" type place many years ago.I used to play Tinseltown In The Rain to death, and it become a tradition to end with either Kangaroo or Song To The Siren (the This Moratal Coil covers)
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:26, Reply)
Song to the SirenYes! Elizabeth Fraser did that so well. There used to be an old YouTube video of her singing it live. I think it was taken down.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:31, Reply)
I just had a bacon sandwichwith honey-mustard dressing. It was delicious, but I now feel too full
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:25,
Reply)
bulimia?twice the taste, half the calories!
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:26,
Reply)
twice the health problemsor I'd give it a shot
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Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:29,
Reply)
Just had to explain 'Turning Japanese' to my colleagues.(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:40,
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Now explain why 10cc are called 10cc(
Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:43,
Reply)
And Pearl Jamand just what is this Dutchy being passed around...
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:44,
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Neither of those have anything to do with wanking or spunk(
Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:48,
Reply)
I thought Pearl Jam didBut a Dutchie is definitely DRUGZ so shut up and that yeah.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:50,
Reply)
Pearl Jamis from hallucinogenic stuff someone's gran made, I think
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:52,
Reply)
I didnt know that!*sits corrected*
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:53,
Reply)
But nobody's said it's about 'pearl jam' either(
Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:54,
Reply)
I never considered "Pearl Jam" to sound disgustinguntil now. Thanks Roota, ya dirty minded wotsit.
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Colonel Dracula Two manky hookers and a racist dwarf, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:55,
Reply)
Birdhouse in Your Soul - TMBGI just think it's lovely. There aren't enough lovely songs that don't have the usual run of the mill rhyming couplets.
EDIT: Also, Drive by Incubus. *awaits torrent of bile from Monty*
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:43,
Reply)
I like that Incubus song.But they are rather pretentious.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:46,
Reply)
I can see why you'd think thatMy mate's sister adores them.
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:53,
Reply)
their album Science is the best onemuch heavier and more interesting than the others
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Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:55,
Reply)
AgreedAlthough I do like the song "Megalomaniac".
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Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:56,
Reply)
science is my least favourite.I suppose Morning View is my favourite
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:58,
Reply)
further evidence that you are wrong about many things(
Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 13:03,
Reply)
This ^Birdhouse is excellent! Just bought Flood on eBay a few weeks ago and loving it!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:49,
Reply)
I keep singing Particle Man all the timeit's just always stuck in my head.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:52,
Reply)
Your racist friendis my earworm at the moment!
THIS IS WHERE THE PARTY ENDS!
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sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:53,
Reply)
I think Am I Awake is my absolute favourite oneI can't remember which album it's on though. First kiss is lovely as well, it's dead soppy.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 13:12,
Reply)
Incubus are brillianthave seen them live twice now and both times all the girls went ape when brandon took his top off. Weird at that kind of gig.
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SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:55,
Reply)
As a vegetarian I often get asked if I miss bacon, which I don't.But never sausages, which are the one thing that I do buy a direct veggie version of. You can get some decent ones from Cauldron Foods now.
When hungover I like them grilled and served in a pitta bread with onions and mushrooms which have been sauteed in soy sauce and then had some soft cheese mixed just before they're served.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:46, Reply)
cauldron stuff is deliciousit pwns Quorn.
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Kitty v1.0 desperately naive, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:52,
Reply)
I don't care who laughsIt's not so much a joke as a meander. I like the idea of kitty and Duck and whoever going along to Cauldron Foods and getting things out of the cauldron, and eating a frog and saying "This beats Quorn" and curing someone's hare lip in the process.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 13:00,
Reply)
Don't laughBitchyChump will have a seizure.
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Roota zweeeeeoooooowm, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 13:04,
Reply)
Tis true.Their Flafels are yumishous.
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Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 12:56,
Reply)
Bacon FTWDy cured, grilled and served on thick-cut farmhouse loaf. NO KETCHUP OR BROWN SAUCE (it's for peasants).
As to the song 'White winos' by Loudon Winwright III.
(, Thu 12 Aug 2010, 16:05, Reply)
4'33"by John Cage...
And Bacon is the way forward... if pigs should have peelable sides so you can just grab a slice off as you need
(, Fri 13 Aug 2010, 12:05, Reply)
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