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This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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We obviously need a new thread
Following on from Monty's "ask me anything" thread a while back, I propose The B3ta Inquisition - ask a question of any B3tan in the hope that they may dignify it with an honest/amusing response. This is basically because I don't flatter myself that any of you find me sufficiently interesting to base such a thread entirely on myself.

Alt Q, in case this is as terrible an idea as I'm gradually starting to suspect it might be - What luxury item is always your undoing come payday, the reason why there's month left at the end of the money? Mine's beer.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:31, 253 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
Mine is dvd's.
and books. I have hundreds on my shelves.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:32, Reply)
Yeah Ms Foxtrot placed a DVD embargo on me
A one in, one out basis. This was to combat my urge to purchase ever film not starring Robin Williams ever made
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:34, Reply)
Robin Williams is awesome.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:54, Reply)
Syntax Error.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:56, Reply)
Beer or computer games/equipment
this month it has been a deposit, which isn't actually a luxury item.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:32, Reply)
I always have money left over at the end of the month
because I am an adult with the ability to stick to a sensible budget grossly overpaid.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:35, Reply)
DVDs
and clothes. Clothes are a massive thing
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:35, Reply)
I believe I have suggested in the past
that you wear less of them
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:37, Reply)
but then I'd have to pay
for damage caused by vomit stains as I walked past.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:39, Reply)
No you wouldn't
Do you know who you remind me of when you're so unnecessarily self-depreciating? ME. That's right. Harsh, I know, but you need to cease and desist this worrying habit.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
lolfat

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:42, Reply)
damn right
tents and kaftans
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:44, Reply)
Don't be silly
well, perhaps a boob hammock?
(berk, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)
They're only socks stuffed down my top

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
You've got massive feet.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:52, Reply)
this made me laugh

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:54, Reply)
my clothes are massive too!

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:43, Reply)
It used to be DVDs and games
But I've managed to curb that a lot in an attempt to pay off some debt. Since then I've acquired new debt, in girlfriend form.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:37, Reply)
Bike bits...
...seriously. I've got an ever growing collection of bits of anodized blue mountain bike parts.

It's not enough to have something fitted to the bike that works well, it absolutely HAS to be aesthetically pleasing too.

I'm such a nerd.
(Bicycle Repairman "you're also a bit of a wanker", Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:40, Reply)
I have a question for Al
Al, what's your best bread making tip?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:41, Reply)
Right well, I'm going to go with original rather than Alt Q:
Question(s)to Mr Darth Foxtrot.
Despite the whole internet believing otherwise, is ballroom dancing actually an excellent way to meet girls? Was your girlfriend your dance partner or girlfriend first? What led you to start dancing?
(Cave Duck, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:43, Reply)
QUESTION mark. Clue is in the name.
Do you see?
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:44, Reply)
You appear to have misread who the question was directed to.

(Cave Duck, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)
You appear to have misunderstood that I was calling you a mong for being shit at punctuation.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)
Whereas you're shit at real life.
And that can't be put right with a quick edit.
(Cave Duck, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Yes, yes I am.
Thank you for bringing that up.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)
It can however be put right with a Badger recommendation
I, Badger, confirm Wooks is more awesome than this cave duck person who I can only imagine lives in his mums basement surrounded by trains, the quite huffahuffahuff of the trains is periodically broken up by the phone ringing and his Aunt asking him if he would like to come round for tea and a good rogering by his uncle.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:58, Reply)
Hah!

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:07, Reply)
A good question
My partner was my girlfriend first, it was all her idea and now Ballroom is like my failsafe - after 6 years of practising together, she won't dump me as her boyfriend because then she'd have to train up a new partner from scratch. However yes, Ballroom is a great way to meet girls as all men who do Ballroom are either a) dragged by their girlfriends, b) there to meet girls or c) gay.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)
I'd guess at mostly c)
But I may be wrong. :-)
(I helped save b3ta! K2k6 has a proper job these days, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:59, Reply)
There's a dance class near where I work
I've seen them walking out of it and all the guys were proper mincers. I reckon it's a dead cert if I am ever that hard up.

Edit: At the girls, like. ¬.¬
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:02, Reply)

ever that up
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:03, Reply)

that able to get up again
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
At the moment
it's car repairs, at my sudden re-obsession with AV. I have been ebaying furiously recently.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:43, Reply)
I have a question for Chompy
Chompy, I am finding it hard to get hold of large (approx 5cm long) paperclips, can you recommend anywhere?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:44, Reply)

www.paperclip.co.uk/
(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:50, Reply)
I have a question for BGB
BGB, Will you be wearing your fur coat to DGs bash?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)
If it's cold enough then yes.
And if I do, you can be coat monitor for the evening : )
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:47, Reply)
WOOHOO!
I'm sure he will be wearing his dapper coat. I need amore exciting coat
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:49, Reply)
your FUR coat?
You disgust me BGB ;)
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Fake and proud my dear.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
Fake fur
Real kitten lining.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
Only Persian kitties are good enough.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:55, Reply)
do you dislike leather as well :( ?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:52, Reply)
I should do but I don't.
Fur is bred just for fashion but leather is a by product of the food industry. I have a fake leather jacket but have just bought a real leather one.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:55, Reply)
and leather is hot

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:57, Reply)
My leather biker jacket is awesome
But hot only in the sense of temperature.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:58, Reply)
...especially on Dean Winchester
Sorry, I just assumed your next sentence and typed it out for you
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:58, Reply)
it's on /ac

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Oh Dean... LESS THAN TWO DAYS TO GO

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
Tomorrow shurely?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
It's only starting in America,
So it won't actually come online til the early hours of Saturday morning.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:34, Reply)
good point
I'm undecided as to whether to try and stream it on megavideo, or wait for a torrent
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Indiana Jones
comics.

It's become an obsession :(
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)
Actually this
Payday usually sees me visiting Amazon, and getting a few new graphic novels...
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)
Well, this too actually.
But I've been buying the originals, mostly from America.

£46 quid last month for FOUR comics (not even novels) :(
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:47, Reply)
I don't trust myself with originals
So stick to collected books... slowly amassing all the Deadpool ones!
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)
I've got bags and boards and folders and boxes now
The Boys collection is comepletely up to date with every bloody alternate cover. Took me fucking ages to track it down.

I'm still working my way through the Hellblazer ones.

I'd love to get Deadpool though, any reccommendations?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:04, Reply)
Hellblazer good!
I have The Boys collected graphic novels, but none of the comics.

'Deadpool' and 'Deadpool' classic collected editions are good, different artists though.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
There's only one question I'd ever want to ask
But I'd feel a tool asking, so I'll just stick to the Alt Q

Alt Q: Booze for me, specifically Amstel from The Swan With 2 Necks, or Peroni from the Bate Hall - £3 and £3.25 respectively, worth every pennyBut
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:45, Reply)
you have to ask it now

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)
this, I want to know what it is.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)
Is it "do you think I look pretty in a dress?"

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Bitch, I know I look good.
*clicks fingers*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
OMLG
*snaps*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:59, Reply)
I have a question for Wookiee
Wookiee, how many times do you think Yamamoto will be lapped this weekend?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)
Oooh tricky,
are we talking how many laps behind the leader he'll finish? How many times every single other car will lap him? The total number of times he'll be lapped?

17, 4 and 106 respectively.

Assuming he doesn't just explode from suck.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:50, Reply)
haha I'd love to see Chandok in a peddle car over taking him

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:52, Reply)
...again.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)
PEDAL

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
Clothing which I'll never wear.
I know I'm buying stuff to make me feel good but as long as I'm not in debt I don't worry too much.

And I'd like to ask TGB why she is still single when she is fucking awesome.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:46, Reply)
I refuse to go out with anyone less awesome than you
And I haven't found anyone else that awesome yet.
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:48, Reply)
: )
Awwwwwwwww shucks!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:50, Reply)
I have a question for Lab
Lab, would you liek a hug?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:47, Reply)
I would love a hug

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:49, Reply)
*hugs*

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
We should totally make Lab into the filling of a hugs sandwich at the bash.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)
I could not agree more!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:55, Reply)
You'll be surrounded by awesome boobs

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:00, Reply)
Lol, hugmeat

(berk, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Woo!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)
Amazon and ebay will be my downfall
Particularly as I don't currently have a tv license (this means new dvds must be purchased with alarming and costly regularity) and I've lost a fuckton of weight recently, meaning lots of new clothes.
(berk, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:47, Reply)
Grats on the losing weight!
If you meant to, that is, not if it's down to some horrific disease.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
this is why e.coli
should be sold in liquid form
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:51, Reply)
Ebola Cola!

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:54, Reply)
Not quite the same thing
Unless you want to lose weight by getting rid of the majority of your blood. Through every orifice in your body.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:11, Reply)
Haha, it was intentional
I used to be a proper lolfatty. Now I am a lolaverage who has lots of baggy clothes and belts and constantly has to resist the urge to go on a clothing spending spree.
(berk, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:53, Reply)
Grats then!
I keep meaning to lose a bit, but it's lots of effort and I'm lazy and love pizza.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:55, Reply)
^this

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:56, Reply)
I'm just old and it's a fucking nightmare to shift once you get past 40.
HEED MY WORDS.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:57, Reply)
It's a nightmare for me to shift it now
After breaking my leg it all went downhill.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:58, Reply)
tell me about it :(
it's sticking
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Time for me to fire up another week
Of well-intentioned, if doomed-to-failure 'healthy' eating and exercise...
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:04, Reply)
Come swimming with me!
I've lapsed into epic fail with it
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:06, Reply)
You're not seeing me topless
And I think a diving suit would be impractical for exercising.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:08, Reply)
Hahaha!
Mankini?
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Stop thinking about me in a mankini

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
EPIC EYE ROLLING

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
Only surgery or a severe case of anorexia will shift my belly.
But if I lose too much my boobs will shrink and my face will look all shrunken too.

I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:04, Reply)

rock cock place on

Your wish is my command.
(porkylips looks better as the sun goes down., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
this is the true danger of LARPing people.
broken bones..
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:04, Reply)
A good friend of mine died at a LARP
11 years ago.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:07, Reply)
Did he die laughing as you ran into a BBQ?

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
Dropped dead
Suffered from a heart condition that had plagued him his whole life. Survived 10 years more than the doctors gave him.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:12, Reply)
oh man, don't I feel like a douche right now.
I'm sorry mate.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:15, Reply)
s'ok!
Didn't mean to be quite such a dick about it, so sorry about that.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
you weren't being a dick about it at all.
oh golly. Look at us. Being so over apologetic.

fuck off you donkey-raping, window-licking bumder. xx
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:20, Reply)
I am impressed
but theoretically opposed to boobshrinkage in all forms

Congrats thought, I know it's not an easy thing to do
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:57, Reply)
I do miss my boobs, it must be said
but it is a hell of a lot easier to buy a decent bra to make smaller tits look good than it is to buy an outfit that would flatter a beached whale.
(berk, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:02, Reply)
a thousand times this

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:08, Reply)
Ooh, I've just thought of a question
BK & TGB, did we ever discover what the rape problem on turn 9 was?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:52, Reply)
HAHAHAHAHA

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:00, Reply)
Thought you'd appreciate that

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:12, Reply)
Clothes I will never have any suitable occasion to wear.
I can't think of any questions. Someone ask one for me.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 12:59, Reply)
Am about to go to lunch so I can ask this and then run, avoiding the torrent of abuse
Why don't you want to fuck me?

*flees*
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:02, Reply)
HAHA
omg
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:04, Reply)
"Like me, like me"
"FOR THE LOVE OF GOD LIKE ME!"
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
How long have you got?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
This can be interpreted in the way you probably meant it to be.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:11, Reply)
Eh?
How did I mean it to be interpreted?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:13, Reply)
Penis length.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Oh,
That's not what I wanted to imply. There was no undertones to it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
So you don't wanna hold him, wanna hold him tight?

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I've clicked this
But it deserves a reply so you know how much this made me smirk.
A little bit.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:21, Reply)
It's better than anything I could have thought of, I may also click it.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
No,
Nor do I want teenage kicks all through the night.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:24, Reply)
Alright?

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
excellent work

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
Why
aren't you going to Lampito's birthday party?
(Himjim died a little more inside on, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:03, Reply)
I don't have the time or the money at the moment.
And I'm coming down for DGs bash with Kitty hopefully, so I shall wish her a belated happy birthday in person then.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:07, Reply)
You are?
Damn.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:08, Reply)
And what is that supposed to mean?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
That I'll be there too
And therefore your impression of my awesomeness will be shattered.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:12, Reply)
Is BK going?
If so, any issue of loss of awesomeness can be recovered by pointing out his non-alcoholic beer shenanigans
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:14, Reply)
You'll be there?
Shit! I might as well not bother then.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Probably best for you to just stay at home and think of how cool I am

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:17, Reply)
Probably.
I'll start practising now.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:24, Reply)
Good girl

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Why aren't I invited to lampitos birthday bash.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
How long have you got?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:12, Reply)
2"

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:14, Reply)
It was cold.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
I told you not to dig her up

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:23, Reply)
Just over four and a half hours.
I'm sure you could give me a summary.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:18, Reply)
Because you played hard to get.
Oh wait, no you didn't.
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:14, Reply)
Marijuana!
actually it's not my undoing. it's about the only thing I budget for.

my question is: I've been out giving a presentation and hosting a workshop this morning and have had to make the unusual step of wearing a tie. I am now back in the office. Should I lose the tie or maintain an out of character smart appearance for the rest of the day?
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Lose the tie.
Or else they will start expecting you to wear one all the time.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:05, Reply)
that's not a problem
most people don't wear them here
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
If you think you look damn good, keep it
If you feel awkward with it on, get rid and play the rebel card.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:05, Reply)
not sure about damn good
don't feel awkward though. it's a hard decision.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:11, Reply)
I usually look vaguely smart
Shirt untucked, no tie etc. Sometimes I'll come in with shirt, tie and waistcoat and look the business, but I don't do it that often, and it's always randomly.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:13, Reply)
I'm not wearing cords today for a change
have gone for some smart black trousers. I almost put a waistcoat on as well, but think that would have been too much of a shock to my colleagues, considering I normally wear a shirt and cords, and often trainers.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Do it randomly one day

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
Lose the trousers
you'll be like a newsreader, smart from the waist up.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:26, Reply)
is it wrong to get with your friends ex?
It seems to be that in my circle of friends it doesn't really matter.
But I think I like someone. And they've just gotten out of a relationship with a friend.

alt: beer
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:04, Reply)
If you're friend's properly over them
then fine. Most people won't be even when they say that they are, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:08, Reply)
yeah, I don't know, they're both friends of mine
and I'm thinking it's best to just not go there.
Maybe wait it out. I DON'T KNOW. *slams face into a wall*
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:12, Reply)
No.
Never mess with another girl's boyfriend, but exes are fair game. *has slept with two of her friends exes and got with another two*
It's hard to avoid in my group of friends, we all seem to get passed around.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:09, Reply)
haha this dumb bitch at the bar last weekend was yelling GO GREEN at my group of friends, because they like to recycle partners lolol
but really, I don't know what to dooooooooo.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:11, Reply)
How recent is 'just'?

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
this week
it's been dwindling down recently
I'm not trying to say anything to them yet, cause it's fresh.
Just thinking mostly.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:17, Reply)
Shortest I waited was a week,
Although that was a special case since a) Me and my best friend's ex getting together was completely unexpected, b) She has the exact same view on exes as me and so didn't mind and c)At the same time, she was screwing his best friend in the next tent along.

Other than this, I would usually wait a bit longer. Couple of weeks maybe? Oh, actually. Who did the dumping?
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:21, Reply)
It's good you both feel that way.
Not sure, but the one let her ex stay over and had the other staying at a friends because she was confused. This went on for a couple of weeks. Then they broke it off. Not sure who did the actual dumping.

edit for clarification: I'm interested in the one that was told to stay at a friends.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Hmm, it's not quite a sinple cut and dry,
But I say give it a couple of weeks and then go for it.
(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
coolio
thanks!
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:41, Reply)
I take no responsibilty for anything that happens as a result of taking my advice.

(Applebite Uh! A cow!, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:50, Reply)
Ask first
That's crucial. If they say no, then back the fuck off. Not worth the trouble.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:13, Reply)
"hey is it cool if I get with xxxxxx??"
yeesh, I dunno bout all that.
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
If it's just a shag, you'll be fine
But if you're actually interested, going out for a drink with just them, and saying about how you've been getting close to so-and-so, and is it alright with her if you give it a go?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
awesome, I thank you

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:41, Reply)
I tried this once and still have the scar to show for it
A friend of mine had broken up with his ex about six weeks before and one night she showed some interest in me, I put the brakes on anything temporarily and went and had a drink with him to see if he'd have a problem with it. Saying he didn't I went ahead and orgainsed a date for that weekend. On the Friday night after a few drinks the guy changed his mind and decided that the appropriate course of action would be to smack me round the back of the head with a lump of 2x4. Not his finest hour but he did end up takeing me to A&E afterwards and she turned out to be madder than a box of frogs so it all worked out OK in the end.
(bill, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 15:30, Reply)
You are young so just think with your loins.
It's the roolz.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:19, Reply)
I'm 28. I think I'm supposed to be thinking with my ovaries.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:22, Reply)
Are you really 28?
Oh forget that then you old hag.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Nah, 27, but I figure I will be 28 in less than 6 months so I might as well just say I'm 28.

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:27, Reply)
they're thinking
mmm fried or scrambled?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
over hard!

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:26, Reply)
One of my best friends
ended up living my ex (who I was with for over 7 years): it didn't really bother me - I simply wished them the best of luck. They lasted a year.

Hope this helps.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:33, Reply)
thanks, sir!

(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:41, Reply)
I have a question for Vipros
Vipros, what's the best excuse to use if you actually can't be assed to go and meet some "friends"?
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:05, Reply)
feel free to not believe me
I could've cooked up a better excuse than that if it were a fake one.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Is this the TG vs Vipros
pretend hatred or actual bitterness? Usually it's easy to tell, but she's been banging on about it for so long that I'm starting to doubt my initial diagnosis.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:10, Reply)
Often I can't tell either

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:11, Reply)
I shall in future mark all Actual HATRED posts with an +

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
I would appreciate that

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:16, Reply)
better put it in your sig then.

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:50, Reply)
No you couldn't, you unimaginative twat.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Sorry, I've fallen down the stairs and died.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:13, Reply)
I have a question
for anyone who promises not to google the answer:

A pack of cards has 52 cards. You are in a dark room with this pack of cards. You have been told that inside the pack there are 42 cards facing down, 10 cards facing up.

You have been asked to reorganize this pack of cards into two decks – so that each deck contains an equal number of cards that are face up. Remember, you are in darkness and can’t see.

How will you do it?
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:25, Reply)
with my hands.
BOOM BOOM.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
turn the light on?

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
Are the face up ones all together or scattered through?
because if they're all together you could just deal the pack into two decks.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Easy.
1. Turn light on
2. Throw cards in bin
3. Torture the twat who thought you'd do such a stupid, pointless excercise to death using techniques from the Japanese WWII canon.
4. Crack one off
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
sexy.

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
Thanks! I've just had my hair 'done'.
Pleased you like it.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
It's all about the hair...

(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Not quite all.
I've got large feet, you get me?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:41, Reply)
you know what they say about men with big feet.
Big feet, big...shoes.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
I love your reasoned response Monty

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
I'm just a one-man reasonable advice hotline.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
You are Alexander the Great
AICMFP
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Call Paul Daniels.

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:37, Reply)
...a cunt.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
Now that's magic!

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:39, Reply)
He has two sons.
One is shit TV magician Martin - the other is a derelict alkie that an ex of mine met in a pub in Old Street. Bitter and fucked up, he hates his dad with a violent passion.

Great, eh?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:49, Reply)
He sounds OK to me.
I also hate his Dad with a passion.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:50, Reply)
Is it something along the lines of
deal them into 26 piles of 2,
turn over 12?? (the bit I'm still checking) of them
add 13 piles to one half, 13 to the other.
(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
You're on the right track with turning over
but you're not constrained on how many face DOWN cards are in each pile, just face up...
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:47, Reply)
Throw away 51 cards
Tear the last card in half. Done.
(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:50, Reply)
FFS that's simple then
just flip over 10 cards
(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:55, Reply)
It took me quite a while

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 16:35, Reply)
General question:
leather or suede boots?

edit: and if anyone wants to be particularly helpful some links to decently priced leather boots (knee/calf high) would be nice
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:28, Reply)
general answer
leather

although I am wearing suede ones at the moment. That is because they were really cheap and comfy.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:29, Reply)
Leather

(I helped save b3ta! Labia Majora You keep on talking but it makes no sense at all, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:30, Reply)
SUEDE.
every single time. But only if they're ankle or calf boots. Anything longer must be leather.
(Poppet some assembly required., Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:31, Reply)
Shiny, shiny, shiny boots of leather.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:36, Reply)
I'm not sure I feel comfortable with this new happy-go-lucky Monty

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
The Velvet Underground are not >normally< associated
with either happiness or go-luckiness.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:39, Reply)
I'm aware of that
but I got a sense of jollity from your last few posts
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
Don't worry - it's an illusion.
My dark heart remains untainted.


*eats children*
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:46, Reply)
Jolly good

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:56, Reply)
Oh I dunno...
'The Black Angel's Death Song' is rather uplifting.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:48, Reply)
I've always been a huge fan of Heroin.
VU I can take or leave, mind.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:51, Reply)
*grabs viola*
*shoots up*
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:38, Reply)
leather boots are cool
but not so good on largish calves
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:39, Reply)
You're saying we should flay the hides off calves
to expose their meaty flesh whilst they are still alive?

Not a bad idea.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:40, Reply)
That's exactly what I'm saying
calfs on the other hand
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:43, Reply)
I have a pair of each
doesn't it depend what you want to wear them with? Generally though, I would say leather. Some of the high street shops (DP, New look etc) have some fairly cheap but pretty decent looking boots in at the moment.
(berk, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:40, Reply)
I have a couple of pairs of suede boots
and just bought some ankle ones. I need some new leather boots but they're hard to find a) reasonably priced and b) with a decent calf size
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:44, Reply)
You can always tell cheap leather, sadly.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:47, Reply)
It's usually worn by cheap people?

(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:49, Reply)
God I loathe the poor.
Always complaining about how deprived they are - and yet frequently really fucking fat. A paradox, don't you think?
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:54, Reply)
high calorie cheap food
cgi.ebay.co.uk/BLACK-LEATHER-WOMENS-KNEE-HIGH-BOOTS-SIZE-6-/170542967909?pt=Women_s_Shoes&hash=item27b5272c65
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:56, Reply)
those look more like boots than high calorie cheap food to me

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:59, Reply)
you're just not
thinking outside the box
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:01, Reply)
They look ok in a photo
but I'll bet you BobbyPires' liver they're shit when you actually see them.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:11, Reply)
probably
not a bad price though. I don't need fantastic ones (and can't afford them) just boots with a bit of a heel to wear with the plethora of knitted dresses and cardigans that will emerge with the onset of winter
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:13, Reply)
My boots of awesomeness.
www.next.co.uk/shopping/women/shoesandboots/11/8?extra=sch&n=women&pid=736-540&returnurl=%2fshop%2fgattcolour%2dblack%2dgattgender%2dwomen%2dcat%2dboots%2d0%3fx%3d1%26nxti%3d0%26nxtv%3d0%23736%2d540&bct=%26quot%3bShop%20By%20Product%26quot%3b%26nbsp%3b%26gt%3b%26nbsp%3bBlack%26nbsp%3b%26gt%3b%26nbsp%3bWomen%26nbsp%3b%26gt%3b%26nbsp%3bBoots

Ok they're not cheap but I got them for my birthday.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:22, Reply)
I love the straps/buckles
but I could make thigh high fetish boots look sensible and staid, so the effect would be lost on me
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:25, Reply)
I imagine I would enjoy seeing you try, certainly.

(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:34, Reply)
that's quite cheap for a nice pair of boots
they are cool
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
Thank you.
I love them to death : )
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:46, Reply)
can't beat a good pair of boots.

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:51, Reply)
I've been looking into that problem
the conclusion that I have drawn is that they are all, without exception, cunts.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:58, Reply)
:(

(PsychoChomp, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:34, Reply)
Don't have any real questions for you lot
Alt A: New clothes for uni. Dull as shit but I bought all my toys last month.

I may as well have said nothing actually.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:39, Reply)
How's my kidney coming along?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:51, Reply)
filtering lots of drugs today
you keeping my flat tidy?
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 13:54, Reply)
Nah. Just shat in the corner, next to the dead tramp.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:09, Reply)
That's ok when I move in and get rid of your corpse
in the wing back. I will sell all your records and get a cleaning crew in.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:19, Reply)
records are being split between me and Dr Tugnut I believe

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:26, Reply)
I'm loathe to sell his stash though
I assume he must have quite a good vintage clothes collection which could fetch a few bob.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 14:31, Reply)
You do whatever the fuck you like with his undies, pal.
The records and drugs belong to Vippers and I.
(Tugnut Ex of this parish, Thu 23 Sep 2010, 15:10, Reply)

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