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(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Sad evening thread for those of us with nowhere to go!
So, where would you live if you had a choice?

Where wouldn't you live?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:07, 262 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
would: Germany (Düsseldorf or Munich)
wouldn't: Liverpool
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:09, Reply)
why Germany?
When I go there things always take a turn for the wurst
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:12, Reply)
I'm with you on Munich
I'd live there give the chance.
(I helped save b3ta! Mrs Entity is in hiding., Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:14, Reply)
Why not Berlin?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:21, Reply)
I've already lived there for two years ;)

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:22, Reply)
Really?
Did you enjoy it?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:23, Reply)
It was from 1980 to 1983
so I don't remember much.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:26, Reply)
Djtrialprice: the drug years

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:29, Reply)
"Back in the day, I'd go round to Wolfgang's house to score.
He introduced me to Kraftwerk and I was all like, 'Fucking hell guys, ever thought about smiling. Or picking up a guitar.' Then I pissed myself and fell over."
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:33, Reply)
Luckily you were wearing a nappy
You are Monty AICMFP. How could I not notice?
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:35, Reply)
my friends are calling their new puppy monty!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:41, Reply)
I bet he humps your leg.

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:42, Reply)
hahahhaha

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:47, Reply)
is it as crazy as it sounds?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:24, Reply)
I love visiting Berlin
it's big but there aren't that many living there so it has loads of space for people to do the oddest things. In terms of nightlife I think it's good to have a local show you because it can be hard to find.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:33, Reply)
I visited while backpacking
it was completely empty everywhere until we found a big street party and the river full of plastic ducks

was only there for a couple of days, though
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:43, Reply)
Exactly that kind of oddness is what I like about the place.
There are loads of warehouses and churches in which people can set up odd art installations or bars or nightclubs. It's a relatively cheap place to live too.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
Would: Cold, northern climates
Wouldn't: Swansea, I hear it's a bit crap.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:10, Reply)
but it's got Welsh birds
And they sound Welsh!

Mmmmmmmmmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:11, Reply)
welsh accents get pretty squarky round
here.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:13, Reply)
Alex Jones
Mmmmmmmmmm.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:13, Reply)
"I'm walking in the air!"
wait x d
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:14, Reply)

l n air bed
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:19, Reply)
We know that
tell us something new
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:24, Reply)
I've got a shrine all around me of printed out
facebook pictures of lady b3tans
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:29, Reply)
have you stuck Roota's face onto the pictures?
I'm not going to suggest with what
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:30, Reply)
If she's reading
then yes I have
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:38, Reply)
True, the welsh accent is one of the best about
But I'd probably just end up mimicking it, which may not go down well.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:16, Reply)
I've been slowly picking it up
over the last 16 years. They love it when you copy them - ban-gin'
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:19, Reply)
where would you have got that idea from?
how north? sweden? greenland? north pole? I hear that's where penguins come from (or is it south?)
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:12, Reply)
Penguins are generally south
Somewhere nice and cold and snowy would be good. Need to take an arctic circle holiday at some point.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:15, Reply)
take a hat

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:24, Reply)
Would, Alaska, Canada
Wouldn't - Anywhere hot, I don't function in heat.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:17, Reply)
Liverpool : /
Would - Cumbria or the Scottish highlands,

Wouldn't - anywhere south of Manchester
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:20, Reply)
Woo, Scotland!

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:25, Reply)
You got room for me : )

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:26, Reply)
I asked when I was back there last weekend
Apparently we're all full up.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:28, Reply)
That's a shame : (
I love Scottish shortbread.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:31, Reply)
If you move here
Do I have to go to Manchester?
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:32, Reply)
Only if the rules are one in and one out.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:36, Reply)
generally a good rule i find

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:38, Reply)
I would live in New York, London
and I could deal with living in somewhere like Buckinghamshire or Wiltshire as long as I could commute

I wouldn't live in Lincolnshire, small town America or anywhere excessively hot
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:22, Reply)
I've lived in Wiltshire for a couple of years too
In fact, I was born there.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:27, Reply)
Take my advice
never go to Lincolnshire
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:31, Reply)
I drive through it at a frightening pace
But then I do that through most places.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:36, Reply)
If you stay too long
you develop webbed feet.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:36, Reply)
I haven't checked my feet
But I have webbed fingers.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:37, Reply)
if only you bothered to wash after wanking

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:38, Reply)
jesus christ amberl!!!!!
i don't want to spend this evening throwing up too!!!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:39, Reply)
Sorry swipey!

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:42, Reply)
you better?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:43, Reply)
still ill
but miles better thanks!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:45, Reply)
good news
sounded nasty
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:49, Reply)
oh god yes
it was quite desperately unpleasant
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:55, Reply)

born hatched
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:36, Reply)
Evening sweetness.

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:37, Reply)
hello dicklick

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:40, Reply)
a charming abbreviation
of 'delicious liquorice'
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:46, Reply)
only cola or strawberry flavoured though
none of that nasty black shite
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:52, Reply)
I had mint liquorice the other day

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:56, Reply)
mint?
how did that work out for you?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
quite tasty
it was from some health food shop
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
interesting
i shall bear this in mind for future sweet-related purchases
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:06, Reply)
id like to live in london with gonz
OH WAIT
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:26, Reply)
:D
Yay!
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:27, Reply)
Some people just find their place in life.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:28, Reply)
this is a happy story

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:44, Reply)
would: new york
wouldn't: anywhere too snowy, i hate driving/walking in the slip
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:33, Reply)
Snow is awesome. I would love to wake up to fresh snow everyday.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:34, Reply)
it looks beautiful
but driving in it? shudder.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:35, Reply)
Yeah I have access to a big 4x4 so I like it.

(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:36, Reply)
I hate the stuff
For the driving and walking through it. It also makes people behave like eejits
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:36, Reply)
do you not enjoy midnight snow fights?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:37, Reply)
See what I mean?
Eejits
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:37, Reply)
we had a snowball fight at my mates' wedding
it was wicked, we have lots of pictures of the bride charging round in the snow
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:40, Reply)
Oh God yes!!!!!

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:41, Reply)
Thank you!
They're amazing fun
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:43, Reply)
other people can still skid into you though
my silly sports car is a nightmare in snow
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:37, Reply)
Yeah my mum has the same as you, It's a beast in the wet too. I had it sideways once and shat myself
never again.
(I helped save b3ta! SteveFrench Cardio is for homo's. do you even lift bro?, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:41, Reply)
yes
i have spent some time aquaplaning along various motorways, heinous.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:44, Reply)
Would: too many to list.
Wouldn't: anywhere really isolated, I like cities or at least being close to cities.
(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:38, Reply)
i think i agree
however sometimes i think that being a nun must be amazing... so much peace and quiet!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:40, Reply)
but no sex

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:40, Reply)
You'd be the Bluest Nun evah.

(Zoz prayed for twink on, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:41, Reply)
i beg your pardon
what on earth are you implying?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:43, Reply)
cities are smelly and crowded
but cool stuff does happen in them sometimes
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:41, Reply)
Cities are ok for the young uns but there comes a time when nature beckons.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:43, Reply)
really?
I've lived in the country and it gets boring
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:46, Reply)
Lies
You can build siege engines and set fire to stuff.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:57, Reply)
And there is space to have big houses

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:58, Reply)
That too
When I was in London for that interview, I was sad at the size of the flat I was staying at, and sad for how much my friend's had paid for it.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:58, Reply)
i had a room in a shared house in London at the end of the 90s
i could touch both walls with arms outstretched. I paid £50 a week. In Swansea something 3 times the size was £35
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:00, Reply)
ally al al!
I'm so excited I could explode.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:59, Reply)
I exploded once today thinking about you
I might do it again later.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:00, Reply)
cheating on me AGAIN, ally-pally???

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:01, Reply)
You don't post sexy enough photos of yourself on facebook for me to explode over.

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
hey now
what's wrong with my facebook shots???
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:04, Reply)
There are no nipples
and precious little cleavage, and absolutely no bikini shots.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:08, Reply)
bikini?
are you some sort of masochist?!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:08, Reply)
I'd take any sort of bathing costume
Are you a tankini girl or a one piece?
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
i has both
no way would i ever ever let anyone see pictures of the evil things though!!!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:14, Reply)
Well you're only human

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:01, Reply)
^ this ^
is yet to be proven
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:05, Reply)
My knee is definitely human
But I'm still hoping that other parts of me are made of adamantium.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:07, Reply)
and i'm still waiting for you
to tell the internet what is wrong with my photos!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:08, Reply)
What is wrong with them is that you are the subject.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)
That's just rude.

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
he's just bitter
because he has never touched a real lady
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)
Swipe knows my tongue is in my cheek.

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)
because you have nowhere more interesting to put it!!!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:17, Reply)
*sad face*

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:23, Reply)
I'd rather have a small house
in a good place than the opposite
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:01, Reply)
You've never held a party then.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
location, location, location!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
That's such bollocks
It's location, house, person your living with
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:03, Reply)
but i have my flat to myself right now...

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:04, Reply)
I shall have a house to myself soon
Win. One room for the drums, and a PA system for a hifi.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:06, Reply)
Perfect opportunity to get your hand down your knickers
and pretend I'm there with you.

Just imagine, we're sitting on your sofa, your wearing a pair of black silk knickers and a white vest top. I'm wearing my old addidas jogging bottoms and an old vest with curry stains on it, I've got Match of the Day on and I turn to you and say "Put the kettle on love, and grab us another beer while you're in the kitchen".
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:07, Reply)
i was getting creeped out at first
as i am on my sofa in black pants and a white top.

but the rest of it was wildly inaccurate, so i relaxed my terror that you are in fact hiding somewhere in my flat.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
POIDH

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:12, Reply)
I'm just waiting for Match of the Day to start so I can come out from under the bed.
This vest is a bit itchy.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:12, Reply)
excellent, whilst you're there
can you get me a fresh diet coke, this one is all warm and flat now.

and a straw. no, not that one, a pink one.

thanks.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)
It's been on since 22:20

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
Since I don't watch it I have no idea of these things
I spent the evening watching all 8 Hellraiser films.

They are mostly utter crap.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:22, Reply)
I'm with you swipe
I'd rather have a small place in London, than a sprawling mansion in Lincolnshire. And I've tried both
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:07, Reply)
Ah, but the thing is, you haven't at all.
You've just lived with your mum and dad in different sized places. Living on your own, or with a partner, makes you really appreciate the possibility of having both a piano and a sideboard to put your plates in.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)

put your plates in screw your wife on
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:10, Reply)
gee, POD
thanks for that image
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
It's clearly the only reason he wants one

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:13, Reply)
maybe, but...
... eeeeow.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:17, Reply)
I find it hard to envisage
having my own proper place.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:16, Reply)
mind you...
... BOTH has to be even better!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)
also
building dens and crawling through undergrowth
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:58, Reply)
And badgers

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:59, Reply)
Also, hay to roll in

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:00, Reply)
They don't have hay in geordie-land
It might make them too warm.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:01, Reply)
They roll in nails
just for the hell of it.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:03, Reply)
They need the lovely cold steel
To cool them down. Mentals.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:05, Reply)
and foxes

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:00, Reply)
bastard foxes
make a right racket on my street, and it's bang in the middle of central london! these are no slinky country-dwelling foxes either, these are obese wheezing orange things like spacehoppers that can barely heave themselves over walls.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:03, Reply)
Out countryside foxes are nice and quiet
Booyah.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:04, Reply)
This is very true
I like countryside foxes, urban foxes can fuck right off.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:05, Reply)
my dad got home once
and there was a foxcub asleep right on his porch.

apparently henry v brought them back to england after he got hooked on hunting following agincourt, no idea if this is true or not.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:06, Reply)
We found a cow in my friend's garden once
Weren't really sure what to do with that one. A deer nearly kicked me in the face about a week later in the same place.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)
a cow??
you're really milking this countryside thing now
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:10, Reply)
what's your beef with it?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
it's just bull

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:12, Reply)
you get so tetchy
when you're leathered
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:13, Reply)
pull the udder one

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:16, Reply)
...it's got cowbells on it?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
What's the fresian for all these terrible cow puns?

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
haven't you herd?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:23, Reply)
one of my earliest memories is my mum opening the
lounge curtains and there being a whole herd of cows on the lawn
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:10, Reply)
they rape babies

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:12, Reply)
cats facerape babies
but you still love them
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
they live off of chips and fag ends, that's why

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:08, Reply)
but that's because you're a young 'un

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:58, Reply)
^this

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 22:59, Reply)
I don't have country survival skills

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:02, Reply)
can i plug in my GHD's?
if not, i'm out.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:03, Reply)
I wish I had your girl-smarts
I have no idea how to straighten/curl/whatever my hair. I'm not even sure what it's meant to be. Did you attend some kind of girl-skills class?
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:10, Reply)
i'm not brilliant with hair
mine is just below collar bone length, and i can cope with (i) straighteners; (ii) curlers; (iii) paying a hairdresser. 9/10 i resort to (iii). but make-up i love, i do all my friends' make-up for weddings etc.

i hardly wear it during the week though, i don't think it's that good for your skin/wrinkles.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:13, Reply)
these things are all beyond me
I have a hair brush and a spare hairbrush for when it goes missing. I can only do make up because I asked some dude on a counter at boots
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)
i keep meaning to do a hair blowdrying course
it would save me about 80quid a week!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:16, Reply)

hair
drying job
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:17, Reply)
i reckon she'd make more than £80

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
pffffffffffffffffffffffffffft
i wrote the book on that one, sunshine
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
You see, you like to boast a lot about how good you are at blowjobs
but I'm yet to see any evidence.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)
the evidence is swallowed usually

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)
i can't improve on this answer

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:23, Reply)
I quite liked it myself
I'm obviously on some sort of slightly sick roll
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:25, Reply)
Or on her little black dress

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:23, Reply)
I really doubt
that she would let anyone come on her little black dress. They're far too expensive for that
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)
one of the last ones
came all over my little black skirt. i had to throw it away, nothing removes that kind of shameful stain.

he was totally not worth the skirt either!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)
I'm not being funny
but as a young teenager, I would wank into any handy bit of clothing that needed washing, and I never found the stains sticking around
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)
that is a truly horrifying image
but if it's black, nothing gets spunk out. believe me. i am a designer skirt worse off!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)
You must have met someone with highly concentrated spunk

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:35, Reply)
tbh
i was whinging about it to my friend at work, and she said the exact same thing - "nothing gets spunk out".

stupid sperm.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:39, Reply)
your clothes probably
weren't dry clean only
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:34, Reply)
Firstly, this ^
Secondly, that's a horrific amount of money a week.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
it's two trips a week at 40 a trip
not sure if that makes it seem better or worse
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:22, Reply)
Much worse

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:23, Reply)
how so?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)
Well, you bother to get your hair dried by someone twice a week

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:26, Reply)
well, yes
i have a lot of work functions for which i need to look super smart!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:27, Reply)
You're an intelligent person, clearly
and yet despite watching someone blow drying your hair twice a week you haven't worked out how to do it yourself.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)
To be fair
there is a knack to it. I blowdry my hair but when a professional does it the difference is clearly noticeable
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)
Yes, the difference is that you are lighter in the wallet
to the tune of two nights in the pub.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:32, Reply)
I don't have that kind of money
and even if I did I wouldn't pay that.

I'm saying though that the difference is clear.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)
the salons around my office
are all the same price, clearly they have co-ordinated
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:35, Reply)
don't make me get all technical
let's just say it's much harder to do it on yourself. and they give you a nice head massage and everything!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:32, Reply)
The head massage is hugely important

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)
correct

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:35, Reply)
You seem back to your usual self

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:36, Reply)
bit shaky and dizzy still
but i managed to eat some plain rice and have not been sick, so i am on the mend!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:38, Reply)
*gets down on knees and thanks God*

(dozers, do fuck off ur a nob m8, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:39, Reply)
Worse if anything

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)
doesn't hair just get dryer?

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
no
a decent blowdry is better for it than straightening it. stupid curls!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
I should probably never be at a bash where you are
not that I wouldn't want to meet you, but I think comparatively I'd look like a tramp. I dry my hair by sleeping on it
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:25, Reply)
don't be daft!
i just need all the help i can get, is all.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:26, Reply)
i wear clothes I buy in supermarkets
and the last time I had my haircut was a year and a half ago (before that 7 years)
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)
I own a lot of supermarket clothes
I feel a bit bad, because I'm sure they're ethically dubious
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)
well stop buying them, then!

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)
To be honest
they are probably no worse than M&S or Next and almost certainly no worse than Gap, which are the other shops I buy most of my clothes from.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)
yeah, but I hate shopping
and have no idea, so I usually buy them when I'm really short of trouser or something and it's getting embarrassing
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)
just do what I do
make a list of what you want then spend a bit of time on the net looking for it on ebay and a standard few sites. It's handy to check sizes in the stores and know what sort of size you need- for example in GAP I wear a medium if it's any sort of top, but won't fit any of the dresses because they're tinily cut on top. Same for French Connection- size 12 or medium is fine, except for their fitted shirts where I'd get a 14. Once you know the sizes just shop on their online stores
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:40, Reply)
This is far to well though out.
My system usually goes:

1) See
2) Buy
3) Regret
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:42, Reply)
I never have any idea what suits me
I'm a fatty, so most trendy things look ridiculous and so pale that many colours make me look sick.
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:42, Reply)
You didn't look fat
in the picture of you I saw :)
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:43, Reply)
man, I forgot I posted a picture once, but thanks
I'm a size 18, that's fat enough to look stupid in most clothes
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:46, Reply)
Size 18? Really?
You looked very waif like in that purple dress you were wearing.

Unless of course I'm confusing you with someone else. You're the LARP love aren't you?
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:49, Reply)
I'm the larper
and i think the only picture I've posted is the one in my wedding frock (kinda dark red?)
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:50, Reply)
Depends how tall you are.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:50, Reply)
5ft 5 or so

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:51, Reply)
You barely have city survival skills by the sound of it

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:04, Reply)
In what sense?

(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:06, Reply)
The puddle incident from earlier?

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:07, Reply)
Thats the one

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)
I fall over quite a lot
I don't think it's lack of city skills
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
I'd love to take a city person to the countryside
And just watch them have a breakdown due to the lack of Starbucks.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:12, Reply)
Thing is, I love living in a city
and wouldn't want to live out in the sticks. But if you dumped me in the middle of nowhere, I've got mad survival SkillZ.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:13, Reply)
where am I going to get my blueberry cheesecake!?

(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:14, Reply)
I'd bring you some

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:15, Reply)
blueberry? ban this sick filth

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
We often do this thing where you buy food in advance
And eat it throughout the week. I don't know how you city boys cope.

I may have been at uni in a city for the last 5 years.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
I has a freezer full of meat as I went to the Butchers today

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
Awesome
One day at the butchers, I found myself just staring at trays of freshly prepared stir fries. I think I have a problem.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)
i would agree with your self-diagnosis

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)
but how do you know
what you will be doing every night for a week in advance or what you will feel like eating 6 nights in advance, where's your spontaneity?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)
Food keeps or freezes

(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)
or goes in the bin, in my disorganised case

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:21, Reply)
You are the reason that global food prices are going up

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)
I could start an environmental rant
But I don't care all that much at this time of night.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:24, Reply)
yeah, noone would listen
talk about sex instead
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:26, Reply)
Ok
Rachelswipe wastes bread by inserting it into her lady regions.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:27, Reply)
how can that be considered a waste?

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)
It's a fucking disgrace
There are french children starving because of the number of baguettes she gets through.
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:28, Reply)
That's how the chic French figure is maintained
she's doing them a favour
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)
yeah, enforced atkins for all

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)
the crumbs must be uncomfortable

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)
frottage

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:30, Reply)
pff!
that's also a technique used in textiles. I sniggered every time the lecturer said it
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:34, Reply)
They're like croutons
For gentlemen callers to enjoy.
(PenguinOfDeath is Scottish, and most likely angry, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)
To mop up the gravy

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:34, Reply)
i can't decide which of these is funniest
but I have had nearly 2 drinks
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:37, Reply)
I've already told you
lemon is better
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:19, Reply)
I agree with this

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)
yes, lemon
best of all the cheesecakes. although bodeans does some awesome flavours.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)
lemon-snaps
though I did have a really nice brandy cheesecake once
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:22, Reply)
toffee chesecake, mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:26, Reply)
+ pecans

(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:27, Reply)
yes
want
(I helped save b3ta! Citizen Cavy Admires your passion for conformity, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)
It's all about been there, done that and now for some piece and quiet.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:06, Reply)
Like so many things in life

(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:09, Reply)
*high fives*

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:11, Reply)
*low fives*

*chest bumps*
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:13, Reply)
If you chest bumped anyone they'd end up in the next county

(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:18, Reply)
If I chest bumped you I'd take the opportunity to squeeze your tits as they're rather nice.
How was Gonz' mixed game extravaganza?
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:20, Reply)
we had pork
The game will be for another day!
(I helped save b3ta! TGB checking Off Topic is still shit at, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:31, Reply)
And if he ass bumped them
well there's no telling really.
(I helped save b3ta! djtrialprice, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:29, Reply)
*sadfaces*
*sadfaces hard*
(Bazongaloid, Sat 6 Nov 2010, 23:33, Reply)

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