b3ta.com qotw
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Home » Question of the Week » Off Topic » Post 983192 | Search
This is a question Off Topic

Are you a QOTWer? Do you want to start a thread that isn't a direct answer to the current QOTW? Then this place, gentle poster, is your friend.

(I helped save b3ta! rob, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1

« Go Back | Popular

As comforting as it is seeing my name at the top of the page, the threads are dead.
Bit cold innit. I love it though, especially when it's sunny and much more so now my heating's fixed. We do love to complain about the weather, but all this 'oooh snow' is a bit premature when chances are 80% of us won't see any significant coverage. Have a thread to bitch about stuff.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:25, 215 replies, latest was 15 years ago)
I've had a bit of a headache all day
Consider that ^ a bitch and a moan.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:26, Reply)
That's it man, get it out of your system.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:27, Reply)
waaaaahmbulance
my life sucks. The weather IS nice though, and I love snow as long as I don't have to cycle home in it.
(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:27, Reply)
*There there*

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:28, Reply)
Thank you for your indifference
I hope your head really hurts.
(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:34, Reply)
Last night you said you wanted to meet me
Today, you wish me ill.

and yes, my head really hurts
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:38, Reply)
Oh, I'd still like to meet you
not least so that I could poke you in the head whilst laughing nastily
(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:42, Reply)
Well if meeting you means I'm going to get my head kicked in
I'd rather not bother.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:44, Reply)
Poked
I'm too short to kick people in the head.

and I wouldn't, I'm lovely really
(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:46, Reply)
I love snow too, all these miserable geriatric fucks complaining earlier this year pissed right on my snowman.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:31, Reply)
actually pissed on your snowman?
harsh, man. That's niche porn though, right there.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:33, Reply)
We had tons of it here
even I got a bit sick of it after the third week of it lingering, although normally at the sight of snow I regress to being a hyperactive 5 year old. If it snows properly again this year though I plan to actually go and DO something in it, not just look at it out of the window.
(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:33, Reply)
I did loads.
Walking, sledging, snowball fights, snowmen, the works. I know how it makes life difficult for some people but why do they feel the need to ruin my fun? *jiggles*
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:42, Reply)
Party at yours if it snows then, eh Noel?

(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:43, Reply)
Too right mate, I'll be wrapped-up like the Michelin Man and pushing a huge roll of snow around town.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
Awesome :D

(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:47, Reply)
Is that a drugs euphemism?

(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:49, Reply)
I just became sick of it because my shoes never stay waterproof
And it was at a time when I was too skint to afford any more.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:37, Reply)
Why does your life suck?

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:38, Reply)
It's boring mainly

(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:42, Reply)
But boring can be safe

(I helped save b3ta! Maximinimus you stick around I'll make it worth your while, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:48, Reply)
It's also REALLY FUCKING DULL.

(berk, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:39, Reply)
I'd like some snow
it's cold enough already so we might as well have the photo-benefit
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:27, Reply)
to be fair to me and my dying thread
it was a question with a limited shelf life!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:28, Reply)
It was better
than another thread about the cold weather. Only 3 today... it's going to get boring during winter.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:33, Reply)
christmas threads will soon abound too....
... we'll be praying and begging to know what everyone is having for lunch soon (spicy goan potato soup from EAT in my case, you?)
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:35, Reply)
I'm hoping desperately that someone here goes to Tesco

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:38, Reply)

Tesco MacDonalds

/lolsuicide
(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:43, Reply)
Nah, McDonalds is a rip off
I can get 2 spicy sausages with a roll for £2.65 from Tesco, fecking magnificent.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
I know
it's season talking time. Oh, well. I found a fork, so I can have lasagna.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:41, Reply)
I have man flu.
It's not nice.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:28, Reply)
The JeffAIDS?
Or just a bit of a man-flu sniffle?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:28, Reply)
Snot, sneezing and sweating.

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:29, Reply)
You sound like a hayfever sufferer on a summer jog.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:31, Reply)
Yeah,
Sitting in a stuffy, centrally heated room doesn't help either.
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:41, Reply)
It's Jeffatitis C.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Or
Jeff a tit is. C?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:25, Reply)
Can I bitch about the weather?
I don't like it cold. It shouldn't be this cold yet. In a week, ok, but not just yet.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:31, Reply)
My sister has agreed to be my guarantor (Woo)
She's sent over all the required details, but she was concerned that we'd been sent the wrong form. I've just phoned up, and the estate agents have confirmed this, but the woman we've had as a contact has been off all morning, and won't be in until 1.

Considering she knew to expect contact from me this morning, it's a little frustrating when she's not left any info for anyone to give to me!
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:31, Reply)
What a lovely story.

(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:33, Reply)
NEEDS MOAR WATERPROOF TROUSERS

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:48, Reply)
But at least you have a guarantor
When will you be moving?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:34, Reply)
Friday should be the day
*crosses everything*
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:36, Reply)
Good luck
I'd help you, but I'll be doing my own packing all weekend.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:42, Reply)
No worries!
I think we should be able to get everything in with only one van trip, and that's only for the mattress.

Also, I'm round Manchester on Sunday & Monday, if you're free?
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:44, Reply)
Sunday late afternoon
could be good, but I can't tell you just yet. I'll know on Sat, if that's ok.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:49, Reply)
Yeah, that's absolutely fine!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:49, Reply)
Cool
I'll give you a ring.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:55, Reply)
I'd like to complain about the fact that Ingrid Pitt, star of a number of Hammer Horror films has died.
There'll be nothing of my youth left soon.
(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:33, Reply)
The original and best lesbian vampire

(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I'lll bitch about my tiredness
that my feet hurt and that I am without a card and therefore cannot return this item I bought since I have no card to put the money back onto.
(I helped save b3ta! Amberl was stripey and dominated Europe, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:35, Reply)
I'm dead tired too.
Bad times.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:36, Reply)
I had a dream that David "call me Dave" and Sam Cam came round to a dinner party.
Dave said something offensive and then I wrote about it in my mémoires.

I'm so fucking cool.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:36, Reply)
You should have killed the waxy faced twat.

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:37, Reply)
That's why people don't come to your dinner parties.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:38, Reply)
They come to them
They just don't leave.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:39, Reply)
So you could inheret his middle class jumpers?

(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:39, Reply)
No, so I can have the pleasure of knowing he's dead.
Fucking hate the guy.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:40, Reply)
I had a dream with Gonz
he promissed he'll fix my PC, so I went all the way to London with it, then he started talking about food, and we spent the weekend eating, and he wouldn't even look at my PC, giving me excuses. I paid for everything too. I was so upset with him this morning.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:44, Reply)
What a subconsious cunt.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:49, Reply)
Isn't he?
Make me carry my PC all the way to London only to eat some sushi.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:50, Reply)
I think we should fuck that fucker up for behaving so selfishly.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:11, Reply)
Go on, let's do it
I'm going to put tuna on his sushi next time.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:13, Reply)
I found a fork! I found a fork!
(and a knife too)

Who's the luckiest girl in the world?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:40, Reply)
"Finding" them in your cutlery drawer doesn't count.

(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:41, Reply)
No, they were the only fork and knife in the whole kitchen
and were hidding on the mugs' cupboard.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:51, Reply)
That's really unironic.

(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:43, Reply)
Teela Brown

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
That's how people call me!
if only I had a puppeteer as a friend...
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:52, Reply)
Woo someone got it.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:00, Reply)
I'm your girl
*wink*
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:10, Reply)
I was sent a black handbag when it specifically said it was blue.
And I want sex again before I lose my teeth.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:42, Reply)
Ask him not to punch you as hard before he rapes you then

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:43, Reply)
Very good!

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
maybe your eyes are going.

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:43, Reply)
I'm sure some guys here would be happy to help you.
About the sex, not the bag.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
Well right now the bag is more important.
Guys here? Pfft!
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:48, Reply)
I thought Jeff was quite keen on it

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:53, Reply)
We're just mates.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:54, Reply)
You can be
fuck buddies. It's good to have sex with mates sometimes.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:56, Reply)
True

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:57, Reply)
Not really my thing.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:57, Reply)
You should give it a try
Mark and I started like that, and look. Maybe in 3 years I'll be going to your wedding (scaring you properly?)
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:02, Reply)
That's a bit sweet
Lucky bastard
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Hahaha
Well, thanks. Took him a bit more by surprise than it took me, as I had my feelings quite clear. Until very recently he's not been able to tell me that he loves me more than he's ever loved before, or things like that. He's doing very well now, though.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:05, Reply)
Don't worry, you'll break him soon enough!

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:06, Reply)
I think he's broken already
he's even started talking about having kids, can you believe that?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:14, Reply)
depends on the mate
sometimes they turn out not to be a mate at all. this is doubly not worth it if the sex was also shit!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:58, Reply)
But that's easy to know from the beginning
If he doesn't text/call you after 4 days, he's a twat. It's a good way to check if your mates are good mates or not, and provides you some sex as well.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:01, Reply)
you are absolutely right
following which the response to such a rude sack of shit is: (i) never text or call him again; (ii) never invite him to anything again; (iii) delete him from fb; (iv) warn your female mates so that they and their friends will never ever go near him or his cock either!

passive-aggression. best of all the sulks.
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:11, Reply)
And women are so good at it!
Apart from me. I'm the "we need to talk" type.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Have you ever tried to get a man to talk.
It's like pulling fucking teeth.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I know, I know
and then he gets upset because I'm pressuring him. Stupid people, men.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:23, Reply)
it's because they don't want to
because they don't give a shit about you or your feelings - friendship or anything more - in the first place.

you were a hole, you got filled a couple of times, now they have done that, you are of zero interest to them compared to fresh unfilled pussy to be hunted down or real boy-mates to go out drinking with...
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:32, Reply)
Blood hell!
You're more bitter than me and that's saying something.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)
i'm being flippant really
it's only true of the real shallow wankers!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:44, Reply)
This is not true of all men.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)
I agree!
But enough for it to be a problem.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:44, Reply)
If you can stay mates though, it's fantastic
I know one lad who received a text saying "I need a lay. Get here now" while he was in the pub. He was gone in about 30 seconds.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:02, Reply)
Was she fit?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:03, Reply)
I find her attractive aye
It's Singapore Girl
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:04, Reply)
I see
She must be attractive, then. Pitty she didn't text you instead.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:07, Reply)
She might have done
But I tend to avoid admitting to anything I've done sexually on here, as usually I'll get accused of bullshitting.
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)
I'll help..
With the bag obviously. Or is that the colostomy one?
(Bear Pookie The Frankly Challenged. Halloween is coming to town., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:50, Reply)
I want an old car. Specifically an mk2 Golf. I used to have one and I loved it.
I can't really afford to buy one without selling my current car, but my current car hasn't put a foot wrong in the year that I've had it. I can't justify selling something that's been nothing but faithful to me to buy a money pit. Especially when I'm driving 60 miles a day.

But I want one. I want one bad. Then I want to replace the engine so that it's really fast.

I miss my old car. Sadface.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:42, Reply)
you should get a VR6 Corrado instead

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
I've thought about it
but, I'd be driving it around and wanting my Golf back. Just as I have done with every car I've had since.
(I helped save b3ta! Kroney, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:46, Reply)
My bro used to have one of those.
Lovely machine.
(I helped save b3ta! Noeli overtheshoulderboulderholderthingstraplatchboobs, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:51, Reply)
*something about VAG innards*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:13, Reply)
I can't be arsed to hang around for the rest of the afternoon
I want to go home

I've only been home for 2 nights in the last 10
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:44, Reply)
Are you an owl?

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:47, Reply)
only slightly

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:54, Reply)
I'm intrigued now.
Which part of you is owlish?
(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:02, Reply)
He's a twit but not a twoo

(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:11, Reply)
very good
I can do a convincing owl impression with my mouth and hands (the sound, rather than the look or behaviour)
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:12, Reply)
Did you find a flat now?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:47, Reply)
got a room in a massive house in the country
with its own indoor pool

move in next week
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:54, Reply)
Great!
Sounds really good. I'm sure you'll be a lot happier there than in a a B&B. For how long do you need to be there?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:58, Reply)
yeah, I'm sick of the B&B already
and of eating at restaurants and pubs.

Contracted till the end of March, but the client wants me to be here longer. I'm going to fight that as much as possible.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:01, Reply)
Can't you move your wife with you?
or is she working as well?
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:08, Reply)
it's only 2 nights a week
also, she's not yet my wife ;-)

more than that though, it's a really fucking dull place to be. The reason I live in Exeter is because I love it there and have a lot of good friends down there. Wouldn't want my other half to have to leave that as well.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:09, Reply)
But almost!
2 nights a week is not so bad. Once you're in a house with TV and you can cook yourself, it'll go like flying. You can use that time for things like reading or doing those things you like and she doesn't fancy so much.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:17, Reply)
yeah
I've got to do some work towards my chartership and it is a prime opportunity for that.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:20, Reply)
Are you able to put dinners etc on expenses?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:08, Reply)
yeah, to the tune of £13.50 a day
I've wangled full board at the place I'm going to be staying though, included in the rent, so that money will be mostly going in my pocket.

I'm kind of bored with eating out as well. And, it's already been detrimental to my waistline
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:10, Reply)
I've really piled it on since not being single.
Constant dinners and less MDs are making me feel well bloated and I don't like it.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:16, Reply)
Aw! it's good to know you're settled and stuff.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:17, Reply)
It's playing havoc with my raping schedule , I tell you.
I'm running out of plausible excuses.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:22, Reply)
just get some rophynol
and a variety of disguises for her to wear and you don't even need to leave the house
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:24, Reply)
Good thinking, particularly if it's a cold winter.
Those parks get bloody freezing, even when you are hiding in the bushes with a hammer.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:29, Reply)
no amount of Sutcliffe jumpers can keep that chill out

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)
Don't I know it.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:37, Reply)
You'll have to find another hobby.
Something that gets you out of the house but that you can share with the girlfriend.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:25, Reply)
She might help out, Hindley-style

*ponders*
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:27, Reply)
hahaha

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)
I'm pleased the new place has a pool
so I can further slim down and improve my surfing fitness.

I went to the local leisure centre pool last night and while a nice pool it was so busy that a fight almost broke out. Seriously. (I was not involved)
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:17, Reply)
I love swimming but hate other swimmers getting in the way.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:20, Reply)
indeed
so it'll be nice having a pool to myself
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:21, Reply)

l to on
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:26, Reply)
officelol

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:26, Reply)
hahahahaha

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:34, Reply)
It's so weird
to imagine you not single... but I'm very happy for you.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:19, Reply)
It's fucking weird for me too.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:28, Reply)
I'm in a cautiously good mood
My tutor is going to try and help me move university. I thought it'd be like asking a Muslim extremist to help you convert to Judaism, but apparently not. She was sound about it.
This better work.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:45, Reply)
Where would you rather be studying?

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:46, Reply)
Either Bournemouth or Sussex.

(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:50, Reply)
Does your 'thieving peasant' ASBO extend to the local convenience stores there?

(I helped save b3ta! Light In Chains maker of the ikea sofa, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:54, Reply)
As if I'd ever get caught.
Too clever for that my friend.
(Barry from Eastenders is, despite the words written above, not a woman, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:00, Reply)
Bournemouth
was (and may even still be) the town with the highest CCTV coverage in Britain. Its citizens have an average age of about 82.

Less benders than Brighton, though.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:55, Reply)
Ahem, that shoud be fewer benders.

(I helped save b3ta! Bartleby A dead man on vacation, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:03, Reply)
Good Lord what was I thinking?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:06, Reply)
You were just thinking about the hot cock.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:25, Reply)
ALWAYS.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:38, Reply)
That's arthritis for you.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:04, Reply)
Why do you want to move?

(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:47, Reply)
Are you moving because all of the local food stores know to look out for you now?

(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:47, Reply)
They just want rid of you, Bal.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:49, Reply)
I'm afraid it's totally this.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:18, Reply)
I don't really have too much to moan about really.
So I'm going to lay into Bruce Springsteen instead. He's a fucking cock and his records are bollocks. 'Voice of blue-collar America' my arse. He sounds (and looks) like a baboon taking a painful shit and nothing he has ever recorded has done anything to move music forward in any way at all.

'The Boss'? Fuck off.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:54, Reply)
I saw him at Glastonbury
I left halfway through.
(PsychoChomp, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:56, Reply)
Very wise.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:56, Reply)
his music bores the hell out of me
fucking dull.

even John 'Cougar' Mellancamp is better than him
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:57, Reply)
A claim that can be made about a very, very small number of musicians indeed.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:07, Reply)
d'accord

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:11, Reply)
Needs more Honda.

(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:19, Reply)
He'll overcome the hurt caused by your attack, by driving up the freeway in a borrowed car with the girl next door type that he really loves but hasn't been able to tell as her Dad doesn't approve.
That usually sorts most things.
(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:58, Reply)
*something about a car factory or metalworking plant*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:07, Reply)
*sax solo from Big Clarence*

(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:09, Reply)
*gay gyppo headband and giant earrings from 'Little Steven'*

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:16, Reply)
*hemi-powered drones*

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:23, Reply)
I was surprised as I read this that Gonz had spelled it all correctly
until I got to the username
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:27, Reply)
i want to bitch massively about a stupid contractor
who has quite potentially blown my client's £3,000,000 claim out of the water.

but i can't.

so i will have to settle for biting chunks out of my desk and deleting expletives from my email explanation as to why her actions were INAPPROPRIATE and how i hope her professional indemnity insurance is up to date!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:54, Reply)
How many calories are in a desk anyway?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:58, Reply)
Less than her last pillow

(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:00, Reply)
Depends what's on the desk Blousie
I saw an advertisement for a 'desk light' the other day.
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:05, Reply)
This is excellent!
*golf claps*
(I helped save b3ta! sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Wow!
I do hope she's got a good insurance, too, if she's going to be fighting you.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 12:59, Reply)
ha, thank you
hopefully i will be able to fire-fight and put it off this afternoon, but..... grrrrrr. why can't everyone else do their job properly, eh?!
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Then we wouldn't need lawyers anymore
and you'd be sad.
(Aberracion Life's getting very complicated, but a lot of fun., Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:20, Reply)
and no longer able to spend £10 on a salad....
very good point
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:27, Reply)
I've already had a good bitch about various things today.
I'm afraid my mood is even on the up at the moment, so I don't really have anything to contribute.

*puts watermelon on head*
(LongJohnBaldry, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:09, Reply)
Is that a watermelon on your head or are you just pleased to see me?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:14, Reply)
Watermelons - look so delicious, taste so bland.

(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:14, Reply)
Not the ones in Kos surprisingly.
They actually tasted of something.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:16, Reply)
Unfortunately, the taste was 'tramp's crotch', but hey ho.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:18, Reply)
You would know sunshine.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:19, Reply)
I have experienced sunshine, yes.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:21, Reply)
Was it a little tablet with a smiley face stamped on?

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:23, Reply)
...from the California region...?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:39, Reply)
Watermelon with hole drilled in it and filled with 2 x bottles of vodka = party magic.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:17, Reply)

2 x bottles of vodka my dick
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:21, Reply)
ah, fruitwankpiss.

(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:22, Reply)
haha

(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:24, Reply)
hahaha actual LOL here

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)

and filled with 2 x bottles of vodka

danger fruitwank.
(I helped save b3ta! the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:21, Reply)
no
i thought we agreed the point was to juggle them?
(I helped save b3ta! rachelswipe with a fork, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:15, Reply)
RACIST

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:17, Reply)


(wellgroomedwookiee is a filthy-minded hobgoblin, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:24, Reply)
Man, Roota looks SO pissed off there.

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:40, Reply)
Loving what she's done with the hair though.

(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)
Bitch bitch
Flying out to Portugal tomorrow at 7:15am. Apparently I have to be at the airport TWO HOURS before that. Which in turn means setting out shortly before 5. Which means getting up at 4:30AM at the very latest.

Sod that, I shall take my chances with getting there for 6:15 I reckon. Extra hour in bed!
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:15, Reply)
Well, an extra half hour - you need time to pack your bomb properly.

(Cave Duck, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:19, Reply)
As long as I wait until after 7:15pm to start the timer
I should be okay to pack it the night before.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:33, Reply)
I have spent my adult life
being the cunt who turns up when they ask, only for some wise bastard to nip in the gate at the last minute. I have my father's words of 'unpunctuality is the sign of a disordered brain' permanently etched into my mind.

Bah.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:20, Reply)
^this
I hate being late and I'm a lousy traveller so I need to be on time to relax before being shunted about.
(I helped save b3ta! girlinthehole, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:22, Reply)
I am balancing my desire to stay in bed
with my brother's "paranoid traveller" persona. We're also accumulating data from people who've travelled from BINT lately about how long it took from arrival at airport to boarding the plane to spend the absolute maximum time in bed.

Get up, get dressed in clothes laid out night before, wash down 4 pro-plus with can of red bull, rinse with mouthwash, pick up bag packed night before, out door - 10 minutes I reckon.
(I helped save b3ta! The Light in Chains don't touch the Pope's boner, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:31, Reply)
unpunctuality is one of my pet hates
it's either just fucking rude, or plain stupid.

I blame my family for making me this way. They are all incapable of being on time.
(I helped save b3ta! Vipros. clever got me this far, then tricky got me in, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:23, Reply)
went out to dinner with the landlords family and it felt like everyone knew she was going to kick me out
it was well fucking awkward

also, I hate snow, unless it's a nice tiny bit, fuck off 3ft storms
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:16, Reply)
How much notice do you expect to be given?
Have you started looking around for a new place to live?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:20, Reply)
I have but everything just seems out_fucking_rageous
Not sure how much notice but I know she can't just tell me I have to leave one weekend, I think she has to give me 30 days
either way with the holidays coming up I'm fucked
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:24, Reply)
Why would she want you to move out?
Any particular reason?
(I helped save b3ta! JeffTheDogFucker Can you dig it?, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:28, Reply)
I've had to stop myself from writing because it's just too much shit to type.
it all boils down to her wanting her house to herself
(I helped save b3ta! Lisette von Falcon, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:35, Reply)
Have you tried bullying her?

(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:43, Reply)
I've got something to fucking bitch about
It's been decided that holidays for the 26th-28th April next year will be decided through picking the names who have applied out of a hat.

Now, I think this is a fucking retarded way of doing it anyway, as it should always be first come first served. However, I'm fucking fuming because I've been informed that my signed off holiday is no longer valid. So for once I do things properly in terms of holidays, getting them signed off months in advance, and now I've had them possibly taken off me, because it's 'unfair'.

Fucking arsehole boss.

/seethes
(I helped save b3ta! Agnostic Antichrist Baltimora, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:36, Reply)
Signed off is signed off, old boy.
Pretend you've booked something expensive.
(I helped save b3ta! Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Wed 24 Nov 2010, 13:42, Reply)

« Go Back | Reply To This »

Pages: Latest, 837, 836, 835, 834, 833, ... 1